MYMOON, Chapter 30:
“KhunKlai… what did you think of the restaurant we went to with Phii Fah and the others in Yaowarat that day? Was the food there delicious?”
“…”
“I’m thinking of recommending it to my friends.”
“It was delicious. I liked it. Especially the crab omelette—it was amazing.”
“Was it delicious because I served it to you?” Panli asked with a teasing smile.
Klai shook his head, smiling. “Puppy…”
Panli chuckled in his throat before looking down to tap on his phone. Klai assumed he was probably chatting with his friends about the Yaowarat restaurant.
Over the past few days, Panli had been going back to his family home more often since Phii Fah had returned from Hong Kong. He said he needed to show his face at home sometimes. Still, Panli would come to Klai’s condo and stay until late almost every day, occasionally even spending the night.
Even during the exam period, like now, Panli still came to see him every day as usual. The only difference was that he’d leave earlier than normal, wanting Klai to have enough time to study properly.
And on a day like today, when Klai took a break from studying for exams, Panli had been quietly cheering him on since morning. Klai closed his last textbook and glanced at the time displayed on his phone screen.
7:30 PM.
At this time, the two of them would usually have dinner together, after which Panli would head home. It had become a routine for them to share dinner every day. Klai thought that if one day they didn’t have dinner together, he’d probably feel like something was missing from his life.
And he wasn’t the only one who felt this way. Just yesterday, Panli had said something during their phone call after he’d gotten home…
‘We’re together every day, eating every meal together…’
‘…’
‘If one day one of us isn’t there… I think the other would be completely lost.’
Klai won’t be bad, Panli won’t be bad… because we’ll be together for a long, long time.
“If you stay with Klai, you’ll get pounced on, you know that, right?”
The simple yet heartfelt conversation, spoken from genuine feelings, caused the already overflowing love to multiply exponentially.
Klai looked at the taller man sitting across from him, engrossed in his phone. The two of them were sitting on the floor with only a low table between them. Klai’s slender hand reached out to grasp the other’s, pulling it toward himself. The owner of the large hand leaned forward, though still looking down, typing on his phone with the other hand.
“What does my naughty one want?”
“…”
“Being all clingy like this… what do you really want?”
“I want to kiss your hand…”
Panli immediately looked up from his phone screen, and Klai gave a small smile before lightly pressing his nose to the back of the large hand, kissing it softly. Panli bit his lip, as if holding back a playful urge. As he made a move to pounce, Klai quickly let go of his hand and asked…
“Puppy… what should we eat today?”
“See, this is how it is. You tease me and then quickly change the subject.”
Klai laughed before saying, “If I don’t change the subject… I’ll get pounced on.”
“You’ll get pounced on even if you change it…”
“No, no, puppy… let’s talk about food instead.”
Panli smirked and said, “Okay then.”
“I remember you’ve been craving pizza for days. So, shall we have pizza today?”
“Are you okay with that? What if you don’t like it?”
“I am fine with it~ Go ahead and order, puppy. I’ll just use the bathroom first.”
“Okay.”
Klai stood up and walked to the bathroom. It didn’t take long for him to finish his business. The man who had been reading books all day raised both arms above his head, twisting his body side to side to relieve his fatigue.
“All done…”
“…”
“Yep, I’m good.”
Klai walked over and stood behind Panli, who had just hung up with the pizza shop employee. The big puppy, sitting on the floor, leaned back against both of Klai’s legs and tilted his head up to look at him. Klai smiled at the big puppy before bending down, his slender hands gently cupping the handsome, rugged face. Then, his thin lips pressed repeated kisses onto the curved lips.
The big puppy, bombarded with rapid kisses, chuckled low in his throat with delight. Klai wanted Panli to know that it wasn’t just him who felt a teasing urge—Klai felt the same urge toward Panli.
Klai pulled back from the kiss, releasing his hands from the other’s face. “I’ve had my fill of fawning over the puppy.”
“KhunKlai… feel my heart. It’s racing like crazy.”
The big puppy, still looking up at him, placed a hand on his own chest. Klai laughed softly before reaching out to ruffle the golden blonde hair.
“With your heart racing like that, can the puppy still go down to wait for the pizza?”
“Just waiting for pizza? Piece of cake…”
“…”
“But if my heart’s racing while doing something else, I’d have to slow down a bit.”
“Puppy!”
“See… you’re thinking dirty again.”
“…”
“I meant, like, walking, running, stuff like that…”
“No need to pin the dirty thoughts on Klai. I know what the puppy’s thinking…”
The big puppy burst into hearty laughter before saying, “I’m totally smitten with someone who gets me like this.”
Klai shook his head slightly, smiling softly, then walked over to grab his phone and wallet from the long sofa. “Puppy, how much is the pizza? I need to hit the ATM at 7-Eleven since I don’t have any cash on me.”
“Five hundred and something baht, but I told them I’ve got a thousand-baht note.”
“…”
“No need for you to withdraw cash, KhunKlai. I’ve got cash.”
“Okay.”
Klai nodded, placing his wallet back on the sofa, then gestured for Panli to head downstairs to wait for the pizza. The big puppy obediently followed.
The two of them stood waiting in front of the condo for a bit when a male delivery worker in a green shirt arrived with the pizza. Panli took the white bags, holding them with both hands. Klai opened Panli’s brown wallet, which he was holding, to pull out money to pay for the pizza.
But a small, silver rectangular packet tucked next to the gray banknote made Klai frown slightly. Curiosity sparked instantly, prompting him to pull the silver packet out of the wallet.
At that moment, Klai let out a huge sigh when he saw clearly that what he had pulled out was a “condom wrapper.” Klai knew the big puppy was always ready to pounce on him, but he didn’t expect him to be prepared to the point of keeping a condom in his wallet like this.
“Puppy! Really, this far…?”
“KhunKlai…” Panli suppressed a smile as he looked at the silver wrapper in his hand, then continued, “Let’s sort this out in the room later. For now, you, pay the guy first.”
As soon as Panli finished his sentence, Klai swallowed hard and quickly stuffed the silver wrapper back into the wallet. He had completely forgotten that the pizza delivery guy was still waiting. Klai gave a sheepish smile to the young employee, who smirked as he took the money. After receiving the change, Klai felt so embarrassed his face burned because of the delivery guy’s parting words…
“Thanks a lot, sir… enjoy your meal, er, I mean, have fun!”
Sigh~
Klai didn’t want to think dirty thoughts.
But the phrase “have fun” really made his mind wander.
Panli burst out laughing before turning to him with a sly look. “Eating with this guy will definitely be delicious.”
“Puppy! You’re in for it…”
“Okay, okay, let’s go sort this out in the room.”
Klai furrowed his brows and raised a finger to scold the other. Panli, still grinning mischievously, followed him into the condo. Once they were back in the room, Klai stood with his arms crossed, turning to look at the taller man who was placing the pizza on the coffee table.
“Naughty puppy!”
“…”
“You made me so embarrassed, you know?”
Truthfully, Panli carrying a condom wasn’t strange at all, and being prepared at all times was a good thing. But the situation just now… it made Klai so embarrassed his face turned completely red.
“The puppy didn’t embarrass you at all…”
“…”
The taller man walked over to him. Panli wrapped both arms around his waist and said, “Who was the one who pulled the condom out just now?”
Klai knew… Klai knew he was the one who pulled it out.
Okay…
Klai messed up…
The one being questioned let out a soft sigh and raised his hand. “It was Klai…”
“See…” Panli said softly, leaning down to nuzzle his nose against Klai’s cheek before continuing, “…how can this naughty one say I made him shy?”
“Well…”
“Hmm?” Panli raised an eyebrow while gazing at him. Klai thought that when Panli was in his mature mode, asking questions calmly and reasoning things out, Klai didn’t seem half as grown-up as the other.
“Fine, I won’t argue… This time, I messed up.”
Panli chuckled in his throat before planting a quick kiss on Klai’s lips.
“Normally, I don’t carry condoms in my wallet.”
“…”
“Because I prefer it raw…”
“Puppy!”
The one being scolded burst into laughter. “I’m just kidding…”
“…”
“The truth is… I really don’t carry condoms in my wallet.”
“…”
“But I think Nanny might have secretly slipped some into my bag… because I’ve been out of the house a lot lately.”
“…”
“And Nanny probably has a hunch that I’m smitten with someone.”
Klai pursed his lips slightly upon hearing this, then said softly, “If Nanny finds out that you are smitten with me … will she be okay with it?”
“I never asked about this because I saw Phii Fah dating Theerak, who’s also a man.”
“…”
“So I thought your family would probably…”
“My family’s fine with it. Dad, Mom, Phii Fah, Nanny… I believe everyone’s okay with it.”
“…”
“They’d only be upset if they saw me crying like a dog.”
“…”
“If you broke my heart… my family probably wouldn’t be okay with that at all.”
Klai let out a soft laugh before saying, “Because the puppy would probably cry a lot, right?”
“…Crying like a dog, it’d probably be pretty intense.”
“The puppy would never cry that hard…” Klai moved both hands to gently hold the other’s face, then stood on his tiptoes to gain a bit of height and planted a kiss on the big puppy’s lips. “…Because I would never abandon you puppy.”
“You said it.”
“Mm, I said it.”
“…And I’ve already fallen in love too.”
Panli broke into a wide smile before tightening his embrace. “And I love you so, so much too.”
And…
I’ll never stop loving you either.
“Puppy… are you worried?”
“I’m about to meet my father-in-law, KhunKlai…”
“…”
“There’s gotta be a little bit of worry, right?”
Phii Jeab nodded with a warm smile. “I finally get to meet Khun
Klai’s favorite person…
It’s no surprise that Klaijai is more polite and gentle than most men, since the person who raised him is so warm and gentle.
Shall we head inside?”
“Sounds good.”
Once they reached the kitchen, Klaijai let him roam freely. He wandered around the spacious room as if he’d missed it for ages, then stopped at the counter, watching Phii Jeab and his lover laugh and chat happily.
The sight before him brought Panli joy without needing to do anything. At that moment, he deeply understood his aunt’s words: “The happier the person we love is, the happier we are. But if the person we love is suffering, we suffer a hundred times more.”
“Panli… come try the freshly baked butter cookies. They’re delicious!”
Panli nodded and walked over to Klaijai. He opened his mouth to take a bite of the small cookie the smaller man fed him. Klaijai tilted his head, smiling so wide his eyes crinkled…
“Delicious, puppy?”
“Uh, delicious.”
So cute… ridiculously cute.
But he couldn’t pounce…
“You’re the first boyfriend KhunKlai has brought to try my cookies,” Phii Jeab said.
Panli nodded lightly, watching Phii Jeab as she put butter cookies into a jar. “Really… I’d like to be the last one to taste your cookies too.”
His words made Phii Jeab and Klaijai break into wide smiles again.
The smaller man turned and gave him a thumb-up, saying…
“Good job, puppy… you’re racking up points!”
Klaijai turned to flash a smile at Panli before looping one arm through his and the other through Phii Jeab’s. The small man in the middle led Panli and his favorite nanny into the house with a smile.
Panli couldn’t help but smile when he saw Klaijai laughing happily. He already thought Klaijai was incredibly cute but seeing him back in his own space— “home,” meaning family—made him even more adorable.
“When I was on the phone with Dad, he said there’s a meeting today,” Klaijai said.
“Yes… the Master left with Ms. Lin early this morning,” Phii Jeab replied.
“But just a bit ago, Dad called to say he’s on his way back,” Klaijai added.
“Ms. Lin called too, telling Jeab to prepare the dining table,” Phii Jeab said.
“…”
“And she said… Master is very, very excited to meet the boyfriend of his beloved son.”
Panli shifted his gaze past the smaller figure standing between them to look at Phii Jeab. She gave him her usual warm smile. Yet, there was something clear in her eyes…
But Panli could sense it was a good feeling.
“Phii Jeab, should we take Panli to eat some butter cookies in the kitchen?” Klaijai asked.
“Sounds good…”
The one being complimented smiled before turning to look at someone who had stopped at the door. Panli noticed a maid slightly bowing as if asking for permission before speaking.
“Head Housekeeper, Master and Ms. Lin have returned.”
“Alright… Then, Joom, prepare to bring the rice pot to the dining table, and call the others to start cutting fruit for snacks.”
“Yes, ma’am…”
“Let’s go greet Dad and Aunt, then…” Klaijai said, turning to look at him before adding, “…Come on, puppy.”
“Yes, kha.”
Panli responded with a nod. He followed the smaller man out of the kitchen, with Phii Jeab trailing behind them. When Klaijai saw his father, he immediately ran to him. Panli stopped at the doorway, giving the father and son some space.
A smile spread across his face as he watched the father lovingly hug and kiss his son’s head. Not only was Klaijai the heart of Panli, but Panli also thought that Klaijai was the heart of his family as well.
Because Klaijai was the heart of everyone.
That’s why Klaijai grew up so well…
“This is it… the heart of the Borirat family.”
Panli turned to Phii Jeab, who had come to stand beside him.
“Please take care of this heart, Jeab.”
“Yes… I’ll take the best care of Klai.”
Panli replied with firm eyes and a steady voice. Phii Jeab pursed her lips slightly before giving a gentle nod. Her eyes were glossier than usual, and at that moment, Panli decided to say something more to her…
“The heart of the Borirat family will never break.”
Phii Jeab gave a faint smile, trying to hold back the clear liquid from spilling. “Jeab wishes you both love for a long, long time.”
“Thank you, Phii Jeab.”
“…”
“Thank you for raising him so well… and thank you for allowing me to take care of Klaijai.”
“…”
Phii Jeab nodded, and a clear tear seeped from the corner of her eye.
As he once told Ms. Lin…
If someone has to be heartbroken, Panli’ll bear that pain for him.
And as he told Phii Jeab…
The heart of the Borirattan family will never break.
But if someone’s heart has to shatter…
That person would probably be the son of the Pisut family.
“Well, then who’s going to take over from Auntie? Because your older brother has his own business too…”
“If everyone graduates, we’ll probably take turns looking after things… but as for taking over, we’ll have to wait and see. Because Dad said if no one wants to run the business in Hong Kong, he might sell the hotel. Then Dad and Mom will come back to live in Thailand as usual.” “Oh… so you’ve already divided up the responsibilities?” Poj asked with a smile.
“Not really divided up seriously yet. But Phii Fah has mentioned a bit that once he graduates, he’ll go help Papa take care of the hotel. And after I graduate, I’ll go help too.”
“But you’re not going to stay there permanently, right?”
“Right, probably just staying there every other week.”
“Oh…”
“Dad, why are we talking about such serious stuff?”
“Well, I have to ask now, don’t I? So I can prepare myself early. In case you have to move to Hong Kong with Panli, I won’t be too heartbroken.”
Panli smiled as he watched the father and son talk. At first, he was quite worried, unsure if he’d get along with his lover’s father. But after sitting down to eat and sharing a table with Klaijai’s father—or his “father-in-law”—those worries started to fade. The other party welcomed him warmly and spoke to him politely.
Since Panli and his father-in-law conversed respectfully, their conversation flowed smoothly as they got to know each other. He didn’t feel awkward at all. In fact, Panli felt very at ease.
“And the cookies Auntie gave you, are they finished yet?”
“Not yet, Auntie.”
“Still a lot left, right?”
Klaijai furrowed his brow, seemingly deep in thought, before saying,
“Actually, there aren’t many left. Because the other day, Panli’s friends came over to watch football at the room, and I brought out the cookies for everyone to eat.”
“Oh… then I’ll bring some more this time, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Panli, which football team do you support?” the father-in-law asked.
Panli thought to himself… their father-in-law and son-in-law relationship couldn’t possibly be shaken over something like this. With that in mind, he decided to say, “Can I skip answering this one? I’m afraid my score might go negative if we don’t support the same team.”
Poj, who seemed calm, composed, and very polite, burst out laughing so loudly that everyone at the table widened their eyes in surprise. Phii Jeab, who had just walked out of the kitchen, stood frowning as she looked at her boss.
Panli smiled, knowing he’d earned full points from his father-in-law. Klaijai’s father tried to stop laughing before reaching out to pat his son’s head.
“Klai… this one, I like. I like him a lot.”
“…”
“Humorous, polite, and knows how to carry himself…”
Klaijai smiled and turned to look at him, “No one could dislike Panli,
Father… Everyone who talks to him ends up liking him.”
“…”
“Especially Klai, who likes Panli a lot, a lot.”
Klaijai is the “naughty one” who knows exactly… how to torment him.
And the naughty one also knows… how much he has to endure the torment of not being able to tackle him. Klaijai is the naughtiest of them all…
After finishing dinner, Ms. Lin invited Klaijai to help Phii Jeab make butter cookies in the kitchen. The father-in-law, Poj, then invited Panli to see the newly built koi pond from the previous week.
Panli watched the large, colorful fish swimming in the spacious pond, the water flowing from the waterfall creating ripples on the surface. He gazed at the scene with delight before turning to the man beside him, who pulled a cigarette pack from his trouser pocket. Poj smiled as he lit a cigarette.
The truth is…
His father-in-law is probably the same type as him.
Polite, gentle, and kind to those he loves.
But when he’s alone… he’s a man with a fair bit of roughness.
“Want one, Panli?” he asked, offering an expensive cigarette.
“No, thank you.”
“Do you usually smoke?”
“I do, but not when I’m with Klaijai.”
Poj smiled with satisfaction before raising the white cigarette to his lips. As the white smoke was released, he said, “Same here… I only smoke when I’m alone.”
“…”
“I built a fish pond to pass the time, you know, for when I come out to smoke.”
“…”
“…Truth is, it’s also to ease the loneliness. When Klaijai isn’t home, I feel like something’s missing.”
“I understand that feeling well…” Panli shifted his gaze from his father-in-law to the ripples on the water’s surface. “Whenever I have to be apart from Klaijai, I feel the same way every time.”
The listener chuckled softly before saying, “And now he has to stay at my place for three nights. Won’t you be terribly lonely, Panli?”
“Just three days… I can still manage. But any longer than that, I don’t think I could handle it.”
“I really like straightforward people like you.”
“Panli… can I ask you something?”
Panli turned his gaze from the fish pond to the man beside him. “Of course.”
Poj exhaled another puff of white smoke, his sharp eyes piercing into Panli’s before he spoke. “If one day… you no longer love Klaijai the same way, would you still be able to be friends with him?”
Poj’s question felt like a massive fist slamming full force into his face. Panli felt a heavy, aching pang upon hearing it. It meant the other man was still afraid and worried. Poj likely wanted to prepare himself in case his beloved son, Theerak, ended up heartbroken, so he wouldn’t lose his own balance in the process.
Panli fell silent before saying, “Honestly… I can’t even imagine that day.”
“…”
“I can’t picture a moment where I’d stop loving him.”
“…”
“I’m not trying to make myself look good… and I’m not saying this to put you at ease either.”
“…”
“But I really can’t imagine it.”
“…”
“If you asked… if one day Klai stopped loving me, could I still be friends with him?” “…”
“I can somewhat picture that question because it’s about his feelings.
It’s possible that one day he might stop loving me.”
“…”
“But even so… I don’t think I could be friends with Klai. Because I didn’t love him like that from the start. I don’t think I could bear seeing him with someone else.”
“…”
“I wouldn’t be friends with Klai… but I’d be an ex who keeps looking out for him from a distance… and still loves him the same.”
“…”
“…like the first day I realized I loved him.”
“…”
“But I focus on the present… I believe that everything we do now will affect the future.”
“…”
“If today we love each other enough, care for each other enough, and look after each other enough… how could we love each other less tomorrow?”
“…”
“Maybe because I think this way… that’s why I told Dad I can’t even imagine that day.”
“Ms. Lin told me that Panli seems like a very sincere person…” Poj said while looking at him, then continued, “…but I didn’t expect too much.”
“…”
“But… thank you for not letting me down.” Poj smiled and lightly patted his shoulder. “Thank you, really.”
“What I asked Auntie to tell you… I meant it.”
“…”
“I love your son very much.”
“I believe you, Panli.”
Dad once said, “If you want to know if someone truly believes what you say, look into their eyes.”
And yes… his father-in-law truly believed what he said.
After Panli finished talking with his father-in-law, he prepared to head home, not wanting to intrude on the Borirat family’s time for too long.
Everyone invited Panli to stay the night, but he wanted Klaijai to spend quality time with his family instead.
“Panli… I’ll take you to meet someone before you go,” Klaijai said.
“Okay…”
“Panli, wait for me a sec.”
Panli nodded, watching the small figure run off into the kitchen. Not long after, he came back with two garlands of fresh flowers. Panli immediately knew that Klaijai was about to take him to meet his mother.
‘His Mother,’ whom Klaijai always called ‘Angel.’
“Are we going to see your mom?”
“Yeah…”
Klaijai answered with a smile before grabbing his hand. Panli followed the small figure who was leading him somewhere. They stopped in front of a room. He guessed it was a prayer room, as the golden-brown wooden door was intricately carved with beautiful Thai patterns.
The small figure pushed the door open and led Panli inside. He knelt on the floor beside Klaijai, and together they bowed to a large Buddha statue. When they looked up, the small figure pointed to the right.
At this moment, Panli saw a photo of a woman placed by a golden urn, her smile as sweet and beautiful as an angel’s. He realized that what Klaijai had once told him was true, and Panli now knew… from whom Klaijai inherited that captivating smile.
Panli moved closer to the photo, then, together with Klaijai, hung a garland of fresh flowers on the golden urn. After that, the two of them stepped back a little in the quiet, square room, undisturbed by any noise.
Panli lowered his eyes to the slender hand that reached to hold his, before the serene silence was broken…
“Mother… today, I have brought my beloved to introduce to you.”
“…”
“My beloved is named ‘Panli.’”
At that moment, Panli turned his gaze away from the photo. He looked down at their intertwined hands again, a flood of emotions pressing heavily on his chest. Panli pursed his lips as he felt a burning sensation in his eyes.
There was no warning that he would shed tears in front of his beloved’s mother. He hadn’t expected to feel so deeply moved and overwhelmed. He didn’t know if it was because Klaijai often shared stories about his mother before bedtime or some other reason that stirred such intense feelings now, so overwhelming that he couldn’t fully articulate them.
Panli took a deep breath, filling his lungs, before nodding as Klaijai gently squeezed his hand. When he looked up at the framed photo again, Panli realized…
The long, arduous journey,
The distance we both struggled to reach the moon together, That journey had come to an end. We had reached our destination…
The slender hand released his and moved to lightly stroke his head.
Klaijai was conveying something through body language, telling him,
“You don’t need to say anything… It’s okay.” Panli exhaled as a heavy lump of emotion rose to his throat. He nodded gently to signal he was ready, then spoke…
“Mother…”
“…”
“I love Klaijai.”
“…”
Though Panli spoke only a short sentence, he was certain that those few words fully conveyed every feeling in his heart. Yet, there was something more Panli wanted to say to Klaijai’s angel.
This time, however, he could only express it in his heart…
Mother…
I will love Klaijai forever.
It might take a long time until the day I can tell your mother myself…
…that both of us are happy every day…and that we still love each other deeply until the last day of my life.
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