EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 17: It’s Gonna Be Alright
“…”
Thank you too.
I’m not sure if it was out of nervousness or what, but I couldn’t bring myself to say “thank you” back, and I wasn’t even sure what I was thanking him for. Thanking him for still thinking of me and caring, for not intentionally leaving me, or for never changing?
Thank you for everything, I guess.
We locked eyes for a moment before I realized and quickly looked down at the dessert menu to hide my flushed face, flipping through the pages without actually seeing the pictures or names of the items. It was just to cover up my embarrassment.
Phii Hill didn’t say anything, but it seemed like he could sense what I wanted to express…I’m not sure. That’s what I felt. I liked this warm feeling in my heart right now, as if there was no need for further words.
“Your face is red.” His soft voice came gently while he still had his chin resting on his hand, not looking away from me…I’ve noticed that as long as I’m within his sight, Phii Hill never lets his gaze wander, as if he’s afraid I might disappear. And those sharp eyes of his…they always make me feel so awkward, staring like that…who could stay calm under such scrutiny?
“Then stop looking.” I said, letting out a quiet sigh. He shouldn’t tease me about having a red face when he’s the one causing it!
“No.” He replied with a cheerful expression, turning back into the mischievous Phii Hill I knew. I don’t know if it’s because his mood changes quickly or if he’s just good at hiding his emotions.
“Then I’ll charge you for looking.” I said playfully. Phii Hill raised his eyebrows slightly and then burst into a chuckle.
“How much?” Phii Hill asked with a cunning smile, his eyes sparkling as if he was genuinely ready to pay.
“A hundred per look.”
“Hmm…” He went silent for a moment, pondering before asking, “Is there a flat rate? Like paying once to look for the whole month?”
“…” I furrowed my brows at him, knowing I was joking, but Phii Hill responded as if he was half-serious, as if he would pay if I really charged, “That’s expensive.”
“Yes.” Phii Hill said, “If I pay in cash, do I get any special promotions?” “Promotions?” I raised my eyebrows in question.
“Like…” Phii Hill said while leaning his handsome face closer. His charming smile seemed to be hiding something, his sharp eyes twinkling, causing me to instinctively move back, even though he hadn’t come that close, “…I could borrow you to cuddle at home for two or three days.”
“!!!” I had to glare at him, Oh my god, since when did he start flirting like this!! I made a face to show I wasn’t playing along anymore, which made the tall figure give an affectionate smile before looking back at the menu.
Sigh. It’s really not good for my heart…That moment he leaned in and smiled just now, anyone would be dead for sure, and honestly…me too, it felt like I died once already.
“May I take your order, please?” a sweet, clear voice from the waitress at our table asked. I hesitated for a while before ordering just a few things, while Phii Hill ordered nothing…still not fond of sweets, I guess.
But he always brings me out to eat them.
“Um…excuse me, can I…can I have your number, customer?” the young waitress asked nervously after noting down our order. Phii Hill finally looked away from me to glance at the asker, “Ah…my friend wants it.” The waitress smiled awkwardly, pointing to another female staff member standing at the counter, who waved her hand dismissively, looking more embarrassed than anything. Phii Hill didn’t respond right away, turned back to me with a half-smile as if asking for my opinion. I could only frown at him, just answer her quickly, don’t leave it to me like that!!
“…” I forced a dry smile when the waitress looked at me, why isn’t Phii Hill saying anything, T^T. She looked back and forth between us, then covered her mouth, her face turning very red.
“Sorry.” she said before quickly returning to the counter with a hurried demeanor, “They’re dating, you guys. They’re dating!” And then the other staff members quietly squealed, but since the café was empty, we heard it clearly. They seemed really excited.
“Really! So cute, one is handsome, the other is adorable, oh my, I’m so thrilled.”
“He’s really handsome, the kind that should be a national treasure, ahh…”
“Shh, keep it down, he’s taken, you know.” Wait…that’s not true at all!!
I wanted to shout a correction so badly, but I couldn’t. Phii Hill just chuckled at my reaction, what’s so funny!? “Isn’t it true?”
“No.” I said with a slight pout. We’re not dating, when did that happen!
“So, when will it be true then?”
“Well…” I pondered for a moment while picking up my glass of water to drink, then spoke without realizing, “Try to win me over first.”
After I finished speaking, he seemed very pleased, smiling so broadly that his eyes crinkled up. I doubt there’s any photo where Phii Hill smiles this widely; usually, it’s just a slight, charming smile, which is why he’s called ‘the smile thief’ by everyone.
But believe me,
The smile on Phii Hill’s face right now…it’s way more heart-stealing.
Would it be weird to say I don’t want anyone else to see this smile?
Well, that’s how I feel…I don’t want others to see it, but at the same time, I’m too shy to look at it for too long. Damn, Ter.
“Oh, and what about the thing you wanted to ask?” Phii Hill spoke up when there was a brief silence between us…I forgot, how could I forget? It’s supposed to be me, the one asking, who should remember.
I took a deep breath to gather my thoughts.
“About when you disappeared…can you tell me about it?” I asked softly, worried it might touch on family matters, but Phii Hill didn’t seem too surprised.
“I can tell you, but I’m not sure where to start.” Phii Hill’s face briefly showed concern before relaxing back to normal, probably figuring out where to begin.
“Um, do you remember the first time we met your grandfather?”
“I remember…” I recalled it, that day was one I consider among the worst of my life.
“How much do you want?” I stood there confused by what was happening. I was on my way back home, with a few people around, all of them looking on with interest. A sleek, black European car, the likes of which I’d never seen in my life, had stopped after honking loudly, making me stop abruptly out of confusion.
A tall, elderly man, about 170 cm tall, wearing a gray coat. His gray hair was styled neatly, giving off an air of dignity, his voice cold and authoritative. He got out of the car and stood in front of me, saying something I didn’t understand. “Would a hundred thousand be enough?” I furrowed my brows in confusion, why would an old man like this stop his car in front of a student on his way home to ask if I wanted a hundred thousand baht?
“Excuse me, what is this about?” I asked, but his stern gaze made me instinctively step back.
“You’re the one dating Hill, right?”
“Huh? …No, I’m not.” I said truthfully, indeed, I…uh, like…Phii Hill, but we’re not dating at all.
“Lies!” his voice boomed, making me jump. Did I say something wrong?
“Stop messing with my grandson.”
“Excuse me?” If I understood correctly, does Phii Hill’s grandfather hate me?
And why would that be? Right now, my heart is both scared and confused. “Nobody is allowed to mess with my grandson…”
“Especially you. I hate those who seek personal gain. Tell me, how much do you want, in exchange for leaving my grandson’s life alone?!” It seemed like my silence only made grandfather angrier; he started raising his voice until I was afraid and wanted to run away as far as possible right then.
“No, sir. I don’t want anything.” I tried to speak without my voice trembling, also trying to suppress my inner feelings. Soon after, two men in black suits got out of the car.
“Sir, please calm down.” Even though someone tried to intervene, the grandfather didn’t seem to calm down at all. He then ordered one of them to fetch a bag from the car. The grandfather took the bag and with his left hand, he rummaged inside before violently throwing a thick wad of gray banknotes at me, causing them to scatter everywhere.
“!!!” I instinctively closed my eyes, and when I opened them, I saw many thousand-baht notes scattered all over the floor. I looked at them in shock and felt a sharp pain in my temple. What on earth are you doing?!
I wanted to retort angrily, but I had to hold back…I didn’t understand what this was about, but the feeling of being insulted was even stronger. How could I be seen as someone exploiting Phii Hill in his grandfather’s eyes?
“!!” And before I could say anything, I was startled again when my wrist was pulled back and caught by someone’s arm without me even noticing.
Phii Hill…!?
I looked up at the tall figure. Phii Hill was glaring back at his own grandfather, his eyes full of anger…for a moment, it even scared me. It was a level of anger that seemed to surpass even the grandfather’s, but the one being stared at didn’t flinch.
Phii Hill gently released me from his arm, gently pushing my shoulder to turn me towards him.
“Are you okay?” His angry eyes turned into a look of concern. I shook my head as an answer. After a while, Phii Hill shifted his gaze back to the tall figure in the coat.
“Why…are you not satisfied with me?”
“Do you want me to speak frankly?” Phii Hill replied with an equally icy tone. “Huh…you stupid grandson, how many times have I told you he’s deceiving you?!” I flinched slightly as he shouted again, causing everyone around to scatter, probably not wanting to get involved in what seemed like a dangerous situation.
Phii Hill didn’t respond, instead, he gently pulled my wrist towards his car which had been parked nearby for who-knows-how-long. “Where do you think you’re going?!”
“I’m going back home to talk to Grandpa.” The tall figure said before leaving the other person fuming. From what I’ve heard, Phii Hill’s grandfather is a hothead, so it probably wasn’t far from the truth. Phii Hill opened the passenger door for me, and the luxury car quickly drove off from the area.
“What…is all this about?” I asked, not understanding.
“Nothing. Just a misunderstanding on my part.”
Hill kept pressing his lips together after hearing that. Instead of the gentle smile comforting me, the throbbing pain was still there.
If anyone else were in my shoes…they probably wouldn’t feel good either, right?
“Is it about Phii Hill’s grandpa?”
“Yes.”
“He said I was after benefits…which isn’t true at all.” I said, feeling hurt. His hand left the steering wheel to gently pat my head.
“I know. It’s okay, I’ll talk to Grandpa to clear things up.” The tall figure said firmly. If it’s just a misunderstanding, it should be fine. I hope Phii Hill’s grandpa doesn’t really hate me.
I stole glances at the driver…Phii Hill has always been gentle and kind like this, and that’s what I like about him.
A FEW DAYS LATER
“Ter…here.” Phii Hill, in his school uniform with a backpack, handed me a beautiful blue bag filled with various treats. I couldn’t help but smile widely and walked over to him.
“What’s this?” I took the bag.
“As an apology…from Grandpa.”
“Huh?” I raised my eyebrows slightly in confusion, then opened the blue bag to find it full of sweets – cakes, cookies, and other desserts.
“Grandpa understands now, and he sent these to apologize for his behavior
before.” Those words made me smile broadly again, and even the person in front of me smiled along. Good…that the misunderstanding is cleared up.
“Thank you.”
“But…you said you two understood each other. Is there anything else?” I raised my eyebrows in question, yes…because Grandpa should have calmed down by now. That’s why I didn’t understand what Phii Thanmild said about Grandpa earlier.
“Actually…I didn’t fully understand everything. We have a small agreement…” Phii Hill sighed softly before beginning to explain.
“What does that mean…you’re not dating then?” Grandpa is always like this, stubborn and never listens to anyone. I believe it has its pros and cons, but it’s not right what Grandpa did to Ter, that’s something I would never accept, even though I might agree with Grandpa on other things.
“Yes.” I wasn’t just displeased…I was angry at what was happening right in front of me. It’s not something an elder should do…shouting at someone on the street, is that supposed to be right? I didn’t want to criticize someone I love and respect, but Grandpa often does things out of uncontrolled anger.
“So you’re saying you’re just senior and junior?”
“Something like that, sir.”
“Well…from what I know, it’s not just that, tell me the truth!”
“We’re really not dating.”
“But I see you take good care of that kid…why is that?”
“I love him, sir.” I told the truth.
That made the person sitting at the desk slam his hand down hard, startling the two housekeepers standing nearby, but I thought I was used to it by now…Grandpa never changes. If he hears something he doesn’t like or doesn’t agree with, it’s been that way since I was a child.
“You…how dare you say that!”
“I am telling the truth.”
“Oh…heavens, my children and grandchildren, all gone mad!! My good son never did as I wished, and now my grandson turns out to be some kind of pervert!”
“Please retract that statement, grandpa.” The last words didn’t bother me much. It just wouldn’t be right…if it insulted someone I love. No one deserves to be demeaned this way, right?
“Quite the mouth, did my son teach you to speak like that?”
“I taught him myself.” came the gentle voice of the woman I love most as she softly opened the door. She is my grandmother. Despite the signs of age, her slender figure and grace could not be diminished.
“I told you to rest, didn’t I?” Grandpa’s previously harsh voice softened noticeably, his stern face now showing concern.
“I couldn’t sleep because of all the commotion.” Grandma pulled her silk robe tighter, “Hill…give me some support here.” I quickly moved to support her arm.
“What’s going on with you two, Grandpa and grandson?”
“It’s Hill…he went and said he loves some boy from who-knows-where, when
he’s just out to deceive him.” Grandpa was still angry about this but didn’t shout anymore because Grandma dislikes loud noises.
“Is it true?” The small figure of the young woman looked up at me, and I answered truthfully without hesitation, which made Grandma smile. “That’s wonderful…I thought my grandson would never know how to love.
Bring him to meet me sometime.”
“Yes, of course.” I smiled sweetly back at her. Grandma taught me differently from Grandpa; he’s a businessman who has been backstabbed so many times he’s become overly suspicious, but Grandma often falls ill, which meant I spent more time with her.
“You old man should stop being so suspicious. I bet you just said the most
awful things to your only grandson.” Grandma’s words, which seemed to see right through Grandpa, made him fall silent for a moment.
“Old people are like this, Hill, up and down. Your grandpa didn’t mean to say those things, trust me.” Grandma said. I nodded in understanding.
“You shouldn’t bring shame to our family by loving another man.” Grandpa said with a colder tone, clenching his teeth as if holding back his anger.
“I knew you, Grandpa would never agree.” I said, making the listener raise an eyebrow in confusion, “So I have a proposal.”
“What?”
“I’ll become a doctor…as Grandpa always wanted to be, as you expected from
Dad.” I decided to say what I had prepared. Throughout my life, with Grandpa’s crazy hope of becoming a doctor, when it didn’t work out for him, he pushed it onto Dad, and when Dad couldn’t do it, it all fell on me…even though I never wanted that.
“Hmm…and will you get the top rank in the exams?”
“Yes.”
“And will you graduate with top honors?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
“No, Hill.” Grandma gently shook my arm, “You can’t force someone else’s life like this. I know Hill doesn’t want to become one. Don’t force yourself to follow Grandpa’s wishes.”
“It’s okay, Grandma. I’m fine.” I said, looking into those dull gray eyes with confidence. I will be fine…as long as I just abandon my dreams.
It’s okay…as long as the person I love is still by my side.
“If you’re not dating…then fine, but I have a condition. You must follow our agreement, and you absolutely must not do anything that would disgrace our family.”
“Yes.” I agreed without hesitation, then gently supported Grandma back to her bedroom to rest.
“Grandpa is stubborn…he never changes…when he was young, he was even
worse. I don’t know what I was thinking of marrying someone like that.”
Grandma sighed softly as she slowly lay down on the bed.
“But I believe that time will prove your love. By then, Grandpa will definitely
have to accept it.” Her beautiful face smiled sweetly, making me smile too. I knew well that…changing Grandpa’s mind would be difficult. There was no use in arguing back or acting like a rebellious child unwilling to listen.
“Take some sweets to that boy as an apology, okay? Grandpa did something bad, didn’t he? Tell him Grandpa sent it, I think Grandpa feels at least a little guilty for acting out emotionally.”
“Grandma, you always understand Grandpa completely, don’t she?” “It’s always been like this for nearly forty years we’ve been together. Your grandpa’s kindness is hidden under all that suspicion. Did you notice when I entered Grandpa’s room, he didn’t shout loudly?”
“Yes.” I nodded in agreement.
“Grandpa has never been bad to me, believe it or not, that’s what makes me feel special.”
“Mean to the whole world, but kind to just one person.” I echoed the phrase Grandma used to say when I was a child.
“Yes, and Grandma has a gut feeling that her grandson will be the same as
Grandpa.”
And then, a month later, Grandma’s health deteriorated. The family doctor suggested she should live in a place with clean air, so Grandpa and Grandma moved to the North. My parents and I couldn’t move with them because of my father’s work, which led to me seeing Grandma less often.
I listened intently to what was being explained before me. In truth, Grandpa still didn’t fully understand our situation; he and Phii Hill just had an agreement. That Phii Hill had to become a top doctor and graduate with first-class honors, that’s quite harsh, T^T
“Do you want to be a doctor?” I asked, knowing it wouldn’t be easy for someone who didn’t want to pursue it.
“Not exactly.” Phii Hill replied, pondering for a moment, “But I can manage.” Even though he said he could manage, if he really didn’t want to…
“But don’t you have other dreams?” I furrowed my brows, feeling uneasy upon hearing what Phii Hill had said.
To be with me, does he have to give up his dreams?
That’s not fair at all.
“I do.” The tall figure said with a deep, soft voice, lifting his hand to gently touch mine on the table, “But they’re probably not as important as the person standing in front of me right now.”
The serious glint in his eyes left me speechless. I could only press my lips together firmly to suppress some overwhelming feeling in my chest, but it didn’t work. His firm hand squeezed mine lightly, indicating that it was okay, that there was nothing for me to worry about and everything would be fine.
I stared into those earnest eyes, even though I was still trembling inside…There’s no need. I no longer believe when you say it’s nothing. There must be something you’re carrying, right?
The words “it’s nothing.” They’ve never been true.
“Don’t say it’s nothing anymore.” because when you say it’s nothing, it usually means I’m the only one who’s fine, isn’t that right?
“Excuse me?”
“I mean, don’t say it, it’s an order…it’ll become a forbidden word you’re not allowed to say.” I said, even though I hadn’t finished organizing my thoughts. Phii Hill looked at me with slight surprise as the dessert I had just ordered was served.
So, I started dealing with the cake out of frustration.
“When I say ‘it’s nothing,’ it means we both will be fine, okay?” Suddenly Phii Hill spoke up after watching me eat the cake for a while. I raised my eyebrows at him, understanding without any further explanation needed, which was good. If it were me, it would surely take another couple of days.
“Oh, uh, that sounds good.” I said, “and don’t think about hiding anything anymore, understand?” I put on a stern face, making him crack a small, amused smile.
“I never intended to hide anything. I just thought if our agreement went well, there wouldn’t be any issues…but it didn’t turn out as planned.”
“What didn’t go as planned?” I asked, curiously, preparing myself a little for the next question, “Does it have something to do with you disappearing? And with Grandma, too.” I ventured a guess, and it seemed to be right. Phii Hill raised his eyebrows in slight surprise when I mentioned Grandma.
“Did you know about Grandma too?” Phii Hill asked with a puzzled look, “You,
Jo…”
Oops…That’s bad. Phii Johan told me not to let Phii Hill know that Phii Johan was the one who spilled the beans.
“Forget it, the truth is as you thought.” The tall figure sighed heavily as if it was painful to continue, which made me hesitant to ask further, as if I was about to press on someone’s wound.
Sigh…today has been quite the day, I might as well count today as one of the toughest days of my life. Rrrrrrrrrr
“Excuse me.” Phii Hill said politely, then picked up the call.
“Yes, Mom.”
(Hill, where are you?)
“At the coffee shop.”
(In or out of the city?)
“In the city.”
(Oh…that’s bad. They’ve been out looking for you for the past ten minutes, they should be there soon. Sigh. We shouldn’t have been late, now they’ve lost us.)
“…”
(I’ll talk to them…Your dad had urgent business, he’s been on the plane since noon.)
“Yes.” I didn’t understand what the two of them were talking about; Phii Hill’s mother didn’t give details, but it seemed like they understood each other with just that.
(Can you rush back to the condo in time, or should it be now? How are we going to handle this?) The voice on the other end of the line sounded very anxious, causing me to feel a bit worried about what might happen next.
“No need to talk to him, Mom, I’ll go back and handle it myself.” Phii Hill responded before hanging up and glancing outside the cafe to see a black luxury car pulling up next to his car.
Before three men in dark suits got out of the car, walked into the cafe, and headed straight towards us.
“Young master, you are urgently requested to come with us.”
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