SMNTCERR, Chapter 37 <110> #1.

Sangwoo was on his way back home after finishing his part-time job. Yesterday’s incident had made him feel uneasy all day, and every tired and irritating step drained his energy. As he walked into the alley in front of his house, Sangwoo genuinely felt like collapsing onto his bed.

There was a person sitting disrespectfully in front of the building, wearing gray sports pants and a bright yellow hoodie, with a hood covering their head, and chewing bubblegum. On the other hand, it looked like an arcade game machine. Bubbles popped out of its mouth before it burst loudly.

It was unbelievable that he had kissed that person twice now and Sangwoo wasn’t in the mood to talk to the other party, so he hurriedly walked towards the apartment entrance. But before he could enter, Jaeyoung, who had been sitting still without moving, walked over and blocked the door, lifting his leg to block it. Just as Sangwoo thought of crossing over, the backpack on the back of his jeans was grabbed and pulled back until he stumbled.

‘This is sexual harassment.’

Because the other party’s hand touched his hip, at this time he wanted to speak out like that, but unfortunately, Sangwoo didn’t have the right to speak.

“Just like that, where are you going? Are you crazy?”

Jaeyoung stood up and blocked the door, observing the atmosphere and demeanor of the other party. It wouldn’t be surprising if he was scolded. Sangwoo calmly looked for a loophole. If he really decided to act, he could break through, but he might get caught while entering the door code.

“Why shouldn’t you have any principles like this? If you kissed someone twice, shouldn’t you have to explain something? How is what you did different from sexual harassment?”

“…”

He checked several times to make sure the other party was really asleep.

Then how did the other party know? Sangwoo hesitated before speaking.

“The first time… I have nothing to say. I was wrong, I apologize. As for the second time, it can be considered a mistake on both sides, so let’s pretend nothing happened.”

“Mistake on both sides?”

“Well, hyung you came and touched my face first… And then spoke in a strange manner, saying it was a mistake caused by alcohol. Normally, I’m not someone who does things without thinking, but because I was drunk…”  Jaeyoung just stared at Sangwoo. When the other party smiled, his face looked lively, but when he put on a blank face, it seemed devoid of any real emotion. Sangwoo felt uncomfortable seeing the cold gaze of the person in front of him.

“Do I need to apologize?”

“Yes. Let’s apologize to each other and make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

The corners of Jaeyoung’s lips twisted into a forced smile, but his eyes remained cold.

“What should I do? I don’t feel guilty at all. And I can’t guarantee that I won’t do it again in the future.”

However, what came back was an unexpected answer. Even though Sangwoo was confident that the other party must consider this a mistake and want to overlook it, he hesitated before speaking.

“Why? What’s good about it is that you, hyung, can speak without feeling embarrassed…”

“It’s not a mistake. And why do you have to try to overlook it? Don’t you feel like I do?”

“Feel what? It’s just an abnormal sexual desire.” Jaeyoung blinked as he heard something unexpected.

“Abnormal sexual desire…?”

“The complex biological mechanism of human development has evolved into a form of experiencing sexual feelings to produce offspring of the second generation. Although I think it is an inefficient method, it is true that humankind exists and reproduces through the process of heterosexual mating and complex pregnancy. The desire for same-sex attraction is just an illusion without meaning. It does not contribute to survival or evolution at all.” Jaeyoung blew so many balloons that they turned into big ones and popped, making it difficult to tell what he was thinking.

So, did I come here to study biology?”

Jaeyoung tilted his head, seemingly not listening to the explanation at all.

“No need to talk much, answer first. Did you go up yesterday or not?”

“What do you mean, ‘go up’?”

“What do I mean? It’s your reproductive organs down there, hyung That’s the one.”

Sangwoo didn’t think he would be asked such personal questions, but he also thought there was nothing he couldn’t answer. Sexual desire is a human instinct. Even if there were mistaken pairings, sexual desire is not something to be ashamed of.

“I don’t plan on denying my own desires. If it’s with you, hyung, my reproductive organ is often stiff.”

“…Use appropriate language.”

“Then what can change? The chance of your chromosome Y changing to X is

0%, already.”

Carving with a carving, positive with positive, north pole with north pole, it’s all impossible. Sangwoo took a deep breath and continued.

“If you’re going to be direct, let’s just say it like this for a while. It’s just a temporary state, it will get better on its own, but right now something went wrong and I can’t control my own desires, sometimes it might take some time, because until now I’ve been attached to you, hyung, but even so I don’t want to leave Veggie Avengers.”

Jaeyoung just laughed out loud.

“You don’t want to see my face, but you still want to use my design, right?”

“Even if we have to work remotely, it’s okay, but I want to finish it. So, please don’t withdraw. I’m begging you.”

Jaeyoung put his hand on his hood and turned around, his face devoid of words, and took a step closer, causing Sangwoo to step back.

Just look at yourself, you must have a brain structure abnormality. Don’t you think I’ll feel uncomfortable?”

“Are you uncomfortable, hyung?”

Jaeyoung stepped closer. Sangwoo stepped back.

“In a situation like this, do you still want to create games? Why are you thinking on your own, you rude kid? Shouldn’t you ask about my feelings or thoughts?”

“What are you thinking, hyung?”

Sangwoo’s face showed dissatisfaction. As the other party accelerated towards him, he quickly stepped back.

“Hey, are you doing this on purpose to tease me?”

“I asked because I genuinely didn’t know.”

Finally, Jaeyoung stopped his footsteps, his face turned away slightly, and he took a deep breath with a loud sigh.

“How can I stop now? You want me to let you off like this and continue making the game? It’s not possible anymore!”

“If you control your sexual desires. And…”

“Damn it. I can’t do that.”

“Calm down. I’m a man.”

Sangwoo spoke in that way and felt like a fool, Jaeyoung smirked. Even now,

Sangwoo thought the other party looked good. At the same time, he felt helpless.

“I don’t care about evolution and chromosomes. I’m not like you. I don’t define who I am, what I will do tomorrow. What matters most is what is here right now.”

Jaeyoung pointed to his chest and took a step closer, his shoulders seemed wider as they reflected the light from the streetlamp. Sangwoo felt a growing fear.

Whether it’s abnormal attraction or whatever. I hope it attracts me. But even so, because you’re a man, because you’re someone who breaks the rules a little, I get nervous. I pay attention to that. I’m not a gentleman, but what about you?

Don’t you know that this is not just about you, but about us?”

Finally, Sangwoo touched the wall without realizing it, his terrifying thoughts made his white brain go blank, and he had some techniques to fight against someone bigger coming into his mind.

‘When did he get this close?’

While Sangwoo was panicking, Jaeyoung got even closer, their lips were only inches apart. Sangwoo became more afraid, thinking that if it continued like this, what happened yesterday might happen again.

“You’re the one who switches on and off by yourself, so don’t tell me to stop in the middle. Who are you to…?”

‘Right now!’

Sangwoo used his elbow to push Jaeyoung’s waist with all his strength and escaped.

“Hey, crazy guy, we are still talking! Come here right now.”

He heard screams from behind but continued to run towards the building, although the distance was too short to increase his speed. Sangwoo was then grabbed by Jaeyoung and held firmly against the dirty glass door.

Jaeyoung locked Sangwoo’s neck and attempted to grab one of his arms from behind. Sangwoo resisted and fought back to free his neck from the hold. On the other side, he elbowed Jaeyoung in the stomach. The two struggled and grappled with each other.

“Let go!”

Sangwoo kicked his leg back, hoping to trip the person behind him, but Jaeyoung relied on his different body size and hugged Sangwoo tightly. They both fell down together. Jaeyoung fell on his back and let out a painful cry.

Sangwoo contemplated taking advantage of that moment and tried to headbutt the other person, but Jaeyoung had already used his legs to lock Sangwoo’s waist and flipped him over.

‘Damn it. If only I had a piece of wood.’

Their bodies were not much different in size, but it was strange that he found himself in a situation where he couldn’t exert any force. When Sangwoo regained his senses, he realized he was lying on the floor helplessly, and someone else was embracing him. Jaeyoung pressed his lower thighs tightly against Sangwoo’s calves, holding both of Sangwoo’s wrists on either side.

Sangwoo forgot his wrestling skills and fell into a deep sleep.

“What are you going to do?”

“That’s right, who’s running away? I’m talking about something important here.”

Jaeyoung exerted force with his hands, and the person on top had the advantage. In this position, lying like this, no matter how much strength was exerted, the other person couldn’t shake him off.

“Now, do you feel like talking?”

“What is there to talk about? I have nothing to say.”

“Hey, look at me.”

“…”

“Forget it, if you can’t talk then we can kiss.”

Sangwoo raised his head immediately, his heart pounding wildly. He didn’t know if it was because their bodies were too close or because the other person’s face was too near. Although Sangwoo didn’t want to show it, his chest tightened rapidly. He thought of the Korean national anthem in his mind. While Jaeyoung started speaking earnestly, unaware of what Sangwoo was thinking.

“Listen carefully, I’ve already told you that even if you’re a man, I don’t care. Choose whether you want to start with me or end everything, including the game. And then we don’t have to meet again, no middle ground.”

“Start what?”

“What do you think?”

The light from the streetlamp reflected on Jaeyoung’s cheeks. His eyes gleamed with a special orange light, and the words of the other person were difficult to interpret. Sangwoo could somewhat guess why the person in front of him was angry and what they were about to do, but he had to confirm to be sure.

“So, hyung are you going to do that… Do that to me?”

The final words that came out of his mouth were more muffled than he had expected. Moreover, his voice was lacking and intermittent.

“Do that? What do you mean?”

“Even if I’m a man, if you, hyung, hold hands, kiss, have sex, and pretend to be like a heterosexual couple to satisfy sexual desires, what about that?”

“Pretending to be in a relationship? Is that…”

Jaeyoung raised his clenched hand and gently touched Sangwoo’s wrist, lowering his face close enough to create shadows on Sangwoo’s eyes.

“Let me ask you one thing. What do you think being in a relationship means?”

“Being in a relationship between a man and a woman to develop towards marriage. Like a trial version of a program, you know?”

“Oh, so two men can’t do it then?”

“Is that a question?”

At that moment, both hands were set free. Jaeyoung released Sangwoo’s wrists and sat down on the ground with a face devoid of words. His skin, bathed in the light from the streetlamp, cast a full orange shadow. Jaeyoung spoke softly.

“Wait, let me think for a moment. If you run away, you’ll definitely die.”

Jaeyoung spat out a cherry pit and tossed it into the trash can before pulling out a cigarette from his pocket, just as the tip of the cigarette ignited in the darkness. Smoke escaped from his mouth and wafted into the air, as Jaeyoung’s cheeks puffed up and deflated repeatedly. Sangwoo stood up, then knelt down, keeping a slight distance from the other party.

________________________________________.

   SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Chapter 36 <101>.

   ‘Let’s make a game together. I need a skilled designer.’

   ‘Um… alright, I understand.’

   Completion  according to plan.

   Sangwoo shot two birds with one stone; he obtained the most talented designer in the university and successfully pulled Jang Jaeyoung back into his life. This was the best start he could come up with. If everything went as planned, he would be able to create another game and regain control over his own abnormal behavior.

   That was an accurate analysis because the minor issues that arose when Jaeyoung disappeared slowly dissipated when he reappeared and had another encounter with the other party. The night of his determination to attend classes and read books in the library for only a few hours came back again. Sangwoo spent four hours studying and devoted all the remaining time to game development.

   Because there was a meeting in the afternoon, he felt restless in the morning.

   As the time for the meeting approached, he felt increasingly worse. In the last

   30 minutes or so, he felt so bad that he sweated in his hands and his heart raced.

   He immersed himself in the first meeting, researching the latest information and typing up necessary documents meticulously. He also stopped by the convenience store to buy various snacks and kept them unpacked. However, he was disappointed with Jaeyoung’s attitude. Being late for twelve minutes might be a habit, but his expression and tone were unusually tense. Although the other party did not appear as intimate or clingy as before, it didn’t seem like they would cooperate on the project.

   It was midnight, the appointed time. No matter how Sangwoo refreshed his email inbox, there was no draft sent according to the agreement. When he borrowed the landline phone from the neighboring house and called the other party, he heard a billiard ball sound in the background. The next day, he realized that the other party hastily sketched out the concept art. He didn’t pay attention, but it made Sangwoo feel even more disappointed.

   ‘I’ll do it again.’

   However, Sangwoo couldn’t refuse Jaeyoung’s request. He regretted wasting the whole day, and it was time to start taking action. But just when he confronted the other party directly and asked for an explanation, the other party requested more time. He gave up his weekend off for that.

   Temporary names: Vegie Venturer, Veggie Venturer.

   But then, during the Tuesday meeting, Jaeyoung came with something impressive—a side-scrolling shooting game with jump action. Although it wasn’t a completely novel idea, it had its uniqueness. The concept art looked complete, as if it were already released. Moreover, the document included appropriate descriptions of all the components. Sangwoo really liked Jaeyoung’s plan.

   One of the two characters in the concept art caught Sangwoo’s attention. The character had eye-catching hair color and a cute face. If Jaeyoung became a character in the game, he must have looked exactly like this—Sangwoo thought that Jaeyoung would like other characters, but Sangwoo insisted on using this character because he believed that people would like a beautiful and adorable character like this.

   With the plan in place, the work progressed smoothly. He worried that Jaeyoung might forget this or that, but the other party’s work skills were impeccable. The problem didn’t lie with the project but elsewhere.

   “You’ve never been to Sin Gam Gwang, right? Come along, let’s go see my workspace and have a cup of tea.”

   The problem was entering that messy room. Just having a five-minute meeting without any issues would be enough, but because of his curiosity about what Jang Jaeyoung’s workspace looked like, he followed the other party. Even though he had imagined the worst, after opening the door, Sangwoo encountered the most horrifying place in the world.

   The cluttered workspace had too many things, mostly junk that even the owner himself didn’t know what they were for. In one corner of the room, there was a woman wearing colorful clothes, raising her eyebrows, wearing a neck brace, and rolling her eyes to the sound of strange music. Sangwoo felt like folding up the entire room and throwing it in the trash. How could the other party work in such a chaotic room?

   Besides having multiple personality disorders and the habit of constantly changing personalities, there were mental illnesses, sadists, and human cancers. He never thought he was wrong—his personality was garbage, lazy, selfish, malicious, attention-seeking. And this was another mess in the sewer. The only thing Sangwoo liked about the other party was their design and drawing skills. If it weren’t for their abnormal physical appearance, he probably wouldn’t associate with such a person. Sangwoo complained silently while helping the other party clean up.

   When the cleaning was done, the office looked somewhat presentable. At that moment, Sangwoo noticed the posters hanging on the wall, perhaps because he had seen Jaeyoung’s works frequently, so he saw other black and white images. Only Jaeyoung’s works stood out with vibrant colors. Now, Sangwoo was studying Jaeyoung, wondering in which year those posters were made.

   The spectacle-wearing person with a hazy gaze, who switched to a focused and sharp-eyed individual when starting work, controlled two different devices proficiently, moving them in the most efficient manner. The eyes enhanced various facial expressions. In normal times, he became a meticulous supervisor, examining the steps and results accurately. That was Sangwoo’s feeling when he realized he had entered the workspace of a true expert.

   He thought that five minutes seemed too short for a meeting. Then, five minutes turned into an hour, and one hour turned into three and a half hours. Even though he was aware of the strange reactions his body might have, he persisted. Although he had to endure the annoyance of repeatedly cleaning the space that had been pre-set to be cluttered and often had peculiar women in one corner of the room, Sangwoo began to dislike leaving the workspace.

   During the two weeks of working together, Sangwoo gathered new information and learned that Jaeyoung had a twin brother. Jaeyoung was close to his grandfather. In addition to Korean, Chinese, and English, Jaeyoung was also fluent in sign language and French. Jaeyoung didn’t like swimming. 

   Jaeyoung frequently changed the desktop wallpaper to female celebrities. Jaeyoung preferred books over comics. Jaeyoung liked movies more than comic books. Jaeyoung could tolerate everything but not eat unappetizing food. Jaeyoung preferred cats over dogs. Jaeyoung was enthusiastic about cyberpunk themes. Jaeyoung was not good at playing games and many other things.

   Sitting upright in the seat of someone who had gone through military service, Sangwoo always felt the presence of Jaeyoung. He absorbed information from the other side, secretly recorded and memorized it. His ears stored the replay of the sounds before going to sleep. Every day, he would glance through, around, and directly at Jaeyoung’s face, observing him without being noticed. Sangwoo felt as if he could close his eyes and draw a picture of Jaeyoung. Even though he didn’t possess that ability. Sangwoo gradually succumbed to Jaeyoung’s influence, slowly like being poisoned by heavy metals [1].

   When it reached that point, he should have stopped, even after sixteen days of working with Jaeyoung, a Friday that marked complete deterioration. Sangwoo couldn’t forget that day.

   On that day, Sangwoo planned small things such as rewards for each stage, leveling up status, attack power, and HP[2] of NPCs, as well as the level of difficulty. As for Jaeyoung, he completed two or three large UI tasks. Jaeyoung sat in his chair for hours, only getting up from it after submitting his work and wandering aimlessly to his bed, where he collapsed. Usually, he would lie down, play with his mobile phone, talk nonsense, or listen to music. But on that day, he must have been unusually tired, so he lay on his side and closed his eyes.

   Fifteen minutes later, Sangwoo turned to call him, but Jaeyoung was still sound asleep. The other party had said he would only sleep for fifteen minutes. So Sangwoo should have woken him up, but why… Sangwoo turned back to his own work as if he hadn’t seen the time. Then time passed and it was already 4:00 AM, time to go home.

   ‘It’s time for me to go back now.’

   No response, it was clear that Jaeyoung was fast asleep. Sangwoo had already slung his backpack on and could have left, but he walked towards the bed for a mysterious reason.

   ‘Senior, are you asleep? Are you… really asleep?’

   He changed the question to confirm that Jaeyoung was indeed sound asleep. 

   At the same time, he slowly moved closer step by step.

   Sangwoo stopped by the face of the sleeping person and stared silently. His messy hair made it difficult to see his eyes clearly. Sangwoo gradually sat down, leaning closer to Jaeyoung’s face. The closer he got to Jaeyoung’s face, the stronger his slightly suffocating heartbeat became. It felt like his heart was being squeezed, similar to a heart attack. Sangwoo unconsciously loosened the tension in his body and used his fingertips to brush away the messy hair of the other person, looking calm.

   Then he thought, ‘Looks good.’ That was the simplest thought. He felt like he could sit and stare at that place all day without getting bored. He wanted to possess the other person, to touch their eyelids, the tip of their nose, and even their lips. Sangwoo’s gaze fixed on the slightly parted lips of Jaeyoung.

   Sangwoo watched quietly before realizing that he had misunderstood something. It wasn’t something he wanted to touch with his hands, but he wanted to do something else. This made him agitated. It was something he would never do if Jaeyoung was awake. It was only a brief moment, a small opportunity that he had. A crime that no one would know if he kept his mouth shut. He acted decisively, doing something he wouldn’t do in normal circumstances.

   Sangwoo leaned closer to Jaeyoung’s sleeping face and pressed his own lips against the other person’s lips. Then he retreated.

   After taking a few steps, he slumped down and sat leaning against the wall in the hallway of the office. He felt a sense of relief, consciousness, self-control, happiness, decision-making, and humaneness that he had maintained for fifteen years without any problems collapsing all at once.

   ‘No problem, no one knows.’

   Sangwoo recited lines from the protagonist of a crime novel and headed back home, fooling himself into thinking that nothing had happened. He ignored the pounding heart and closed his eyes.

   But the difficulty didn’t end there. While his mind was crumbling, an incident that would bring him to his knees occurred the next day.

   ‘Oh, come out. Let’s go together.’

   When his heart raced after seeing the smiling face of the guy at the internet cafe through the storefront, he realized that something abnormal had happened and thought he should escape. This group often lived with regrets later on. His decision-making skills would cause serious problems without fail.

   [printf[3]”No, I’m busy, and I don’t want to see your face, hyungnim. 

   Goodbye.”;]

   He was confident that he had fed the information like that, but the result turned out to be…

   ‘Sure, where am I going?’

   That result led to a major accident.

   Sangwoo picked up his hat and put it on, then walked towards the cashier calmly. He paid half the bill and left the restaurant, running all the way back home. After brushing his teeth, washing his face, and changing clothes, he crawled under the blanket. But even that didn’t mean that what he had done disappeared.

   He kicked the blanket hard, causing it to fly up to the ceiling and fall down, covering his face. Sangwoo’s body trembled in the darkness.

   ‘Am I becoming slaves of love?’

   ‘Do I have to graduate from this university?’

   ‘Do I still have value to keep living or not?’

   That day, he was disturbed by numerous questions, to the point of exhaustion.

   The strong sexual desires that manifest in an individual during adolescence. Sangwoo remembered the soft heartbeat that occurred on the bus when a girl walked by with a pleasant scent. In high school, he secretly admired a beautiful teacher, and as an adult, he had officially dated someone of the opposite sex once, but he had never experienced such intense desire before ‘the kind that would want to do that super sexual thing to the other person while they sleep, the kind that he loses self-control in someone else’s workplace’.

   Moreover, Jaeyoung is not a woman. When it comes to men, he has encountered countless experiences, both in all-boys middle school, all-boys high school, engineering faculty, and the military, but Sangwoo has never encountered such a case where he felt like this before. It is an occurrence that he never even thought about, just like when his father married his mother, or when his aunt married his uncle. Sangwoo thinks that one day he will hold hands with a woman, kiss, have sex, and get married.

   But there is one person who acts like an Error in that equation, who has already taken control of one of those steps.

   [1] Heavy Metal Poisoning occurs when certain metals accumulate in the body through food, water, industrial chemicals, or other sources. [2] Hit Point “HP” is the life force value of a character in a game.

   [3] The printf” function, also known as “print format.” is used to display data on a screen, whether it be characters, text, numbers, or variable values.

      SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Chapter 35 Cyan #8.

   Sangwoo’s eyes looked slightly agitated, but why was he pounding this hard? Jaeyoung pulled a chair closer to the table and positioned himself in front of the person, synchronizing their hands together.

   “Yes. Hyungnim, should I call you that?”

   Sangwoo paused for a moment before coughing twice and looked at Jaeyoung again, then spoke.

   “You… if you see my suggestions as a joke, it must be difficult for you.”

   “What’s so funny about it? I’m genuinely listening to every word carefully.”

   “Then why do you keep making the same mistakes?”

   “I’ll be careful, Hyungnim.”

   “Did your “Enter” key on the keyboard break or something? You’re good at English, why do you keep typing it wrong? It’s not that difficult, pay attention a bit, okay? Huh?”

   ‘He’s even able to bring up work topics in a drinking circle. This kid is really something.’

   Jaeyoung picked up a piece of gum and handed it to Sangwoo.

   “Have this, hyungnim.”

   Sangwoo chewed the gum deliberately before swallowing and continued speaking.

   “And… you, do you secretly skip steps because you don’t follow the work schedule? The deadlines keep getting pushed back.”

   “Doing that sometimes has its benefits. And I apologize a little, I’ll take responsibility and do everything later myself.”

   “Just in words?”

   “No. Today, I worked before coming here.”

   He lied. Today, Jaeyoung had been preoccupied with thoughts of Sangwoo and hadn’t done anything at all, but he was confident that he would do something someday, although he didn’t know when that would be true.

   “Invite me to play Yaja Time to mock me, my dear Sangwoo-hyung.”

   Sangwoo raised an eyebrow. Jaeyoung quickly reached out and fed the yakult to the other person’s mouth, then glanced through. The other person seemed fine, but with this look, Sangwoo himself seemed drunk too, his eyes appearing slightly relaxed. Even when he opened his mouth to receive it and closed it gracefully, he couldn’t maintain the perfect image, far from the robotic appearance in normal times.

   “I want to hear you speak politely, you rude guy.”

   “Oh, really? Then, hyungnim, have a glass of Soju.”

   Jaeyoung lifted Sangwoo’s Soju glass and touched the edge of his own lips. Sangwoo drank it calmly, after swallowing what was in his mouth, he pointed his finger at Jaeyoung.

   “Here you go, Jang Jaeyoung.”

   “Yes, please go ahead and say it.”

   “You crazy bastard… You know, right?”

   “Of course, I know very well.”

   Sangwoo laughed softly before hugging his chest and turning away.

   “You…crazy…come write another person’s face.”

   “That’s right. I’m really terrible. Why am I able to do that to your face?”

   “So, you mean they didn’t manipulate the drinks… That’s a clear profitdriven manipulation, huh? Ever heard of Heo Sangjun[1]? Do you know about it?”  “That’s right. It’s an eye-opening office protecting consumers for real. I’m realizing my mistake.”

   “You trash…”

   “I’m just human trash who can’t be really recycled. Would you like me to kneel down for you?”

   From his seat, Sangwoo quickly lifted his upper body. He then placed his arms crossed on the table and rested his chin on them, his elbows pushing the yakult plate to the side. If Jaeyoung didn’t catch it, it would have fallen to the floor.

   Because Jaeyoung himself was sitting close to the table, their faces were very close. The brim of the other party’s hat grazed against his forehead. Jaeyoung leaned down, resting his chin on his arm like Sangwoo. When his eyes that were concealed by the hat were revealed, his heart raced faster. Every time Sangwoo blinked, his eyelashes fluttered up and down, and the corners of his lips gradually moved.

   “You…if you’re not handsome, you can’t do anything.”

   “Even if your appearance is not good, a garbage human like me should just die, right?”

   “I know this.”

   His slightly drifting eyes, affected by the drunkenness, carefully examined

   Jaeyoung’s face. No matter where their eyes looked, they felt a warmth rising.  Sangwoo’s gaze paused at the forehead before moving to the nose, ears, neck, and chin. And it stopped at the corner of the lips. Sangwoo lowered his gaze, and Jaeyoung could see that the other party’s lips were revealed.

   “My face will be ruined soon. Sangwoo.”

   Sangwoo lowered his eyes even more, almost closing them. He took advantage of the moment to reach out and grab a bottle of soju and pour it into Jaeyoung’s glass. Jaeyoung took the glass back and drank half without hesitation before speaking.

   “Am I handsome?”

   Sangwoo pretended not to hear and filled Jaeyoung’s glass with soju.

   Jaeyoung lifted the glass back to replace his answer and drank it all at once.

   “Am…I handsome?”

   Jaeyoung spoke softly and slowly, gazing into Sangwoo’s black eyes, eyes that were slightly forgetful and lacked their usual intensity.

   ‘What are you thinking? If I guess correctly, you must want me.’ Then Sangwoo finally responded in a soft voice.

   “Yes.”

   Jaeyoung blinked slowly, feeling a jolt of emotion surge from his heart throughout his body, unaware, aiming to investigate the danger of this relationship, to make sure it fades away. Jaeyoung drank more soju, perhaps because of that, he could only think about it.

   He placed his hand on the table and stood up, his body slightly trembling but still maintaining an upright posture. Then he pushed the table that separated them to the side and took a step closer to Sangwoo. Sangwoo raised his head and saw the other side’s face clearly.

   “Sangwoo.”

   “What is it?”

   “Can you take it off?”

   “…”

   His flushed face wasn’t because of the effects of alcohol, he believed that conflicting feelings in his heart were saying, ‘No.’

   “What are you thinking? I mean the hat.”

   He pulled off the hat without permission. When he saw Sangwoo’s surprised expression, a feeling of joy welled up in his heart. The other side was not the protagonist in a manga who changed so drastically just by taking off glasses.

   No, he was just a slightly shy boy, but even his suppressed soul screamed like that. Jaeyoung didn’t listen.

   The black eyes perfectly contrasted with the fair skin, creating a distinct image that is both refined and unrefined. What’s more, there were glimpses of eyes that never appeared indifferent. Chu Sangwoo, surrounded by a distorted filter fueled by alcohol and emotions, was no different from an incubus [2] that ignited an overwhelming sense of fantasy.

   “Are you not going to fly in rage?”

   Jaeyoung’s voice was softer than usual, he was standing right in front of Sangwoo, unable to control anything… Whether it was his tone, facial expression, genitals, or anything else.

   “Give it back, please.”

   Those pairs of eyes glanced up, his hand nervously touched his horse-like hair, such a face, there was no way for me to return the hat nicely.

   “Give it back, will you?”

   “If I say no, what will you do?”

   “Told you to give it to me.”

   “Oh, angry again.”

   “You… playing with something that sets boundaries!”

   Sangwoo stood up abruptly, his body not too short or too tall, just average height. Jaeyoung liked that Sangwoo had to raise his head to meet his gaze, and he liked that he had to slightly lower his face to look down from above, his chest moving with hot breath.

   He waited for Sangwoo to reach out for the hat, and in that moment, he firmly held the other side’s wrist, locking their forearms together. He looked into Sangwoo’s confused eyes from a close distance. Sangwoo glanced down at the floor.

   “Hey, fuck…”

   Jaeyoung had just heard Sangwoo’s vulgar language for the first time, and the voice of the other party was as low as his own.

   “Hey, what’s up?”

   “I didn’t mean you.”

   Sangwoo stared at Jaeyoung with fierce eyes, refusing to back down. Jaeyoung stood still, took a deep breath, wanting to touch the other party’s body until he couldn’t resist.

   “Sangwoo-ya.”

   “Yes.”

   Jaeyoung slowly raised his right hand, aiming for Sangwoo’s cheek. Then, using the tip of his thumb, he gently brushed against the corner of the other party’s cheek. Jaeyoung could feel through his skin that Sangwoo’s body was trembling.

   “Just a warning… don’t call me ‘hyung’.”

   “Yes.”

   “If you dare to call me like that again…”

   “Yes, hyung?”

   Jaeyoung clenched his fist, and this time Sangwoo did not look away.

   “You’re damn handsome.”

   Jaeyoung bit his lower lip, feeling his heart sink. His hand moved like a snake, descending towards the neck he had been watching. Then he wrapped it around the warm base of the neck, pulled it towards himself slightly, and stopped before their foreheads touched.

   The face in front of him looked hot, with deep black eyes looking at him without a hint of embarrassment. Jaeyoung’s weak consciousness was diminishing, but he was fortunate not to forget who the other party was.

   “Just so you know. In one minute, I’ll kiss you.”

   The final rule he didn’t forget, a gesture that was just a superficial ritual, unrelated to the depths of the heart.

   “If you want to escape, do it now.”

   A heavy, lingering breath, each exhale producing a sound similar to a sigh coming from their mouths. The touching skin felt only warmth, surrounding them like an invisible flame. One of their gazes flickered for a moment.

   Jaeyoung looked at that image without consciousness. Sangwoo held

   Jaeyoung’s shirt on his chest with a weak hand and pulled him closer to himself.

   ‘Forty-eight seconds left.’

   Sangwoo slowly closed his eyelids and pressed his lips against Jaeyoung’s lips, just like yesterday.

   Pop, Fuse blown.. Jaeyoung provocatively pulled Sangwoo’s head and tugged him closer to seek, tilting his head slightly and swallowing the edge of the other party’s lips. He sent his tongue into that mouth. The other party was surprised but responded in the same way.

   From that moment on, he couldn’t see or hear anything else. He could only feel the distinct sensation of overlapping lips, entangled tongues, and synchronized breaths. That warm feeling was devoid of purity; it was both wild and rough, filled with an intense desire that couldn’t be replenished in an instant.

   The kiss, devoid of romantic nuances or conclusions, had only one climax from beginning to end. Perhaps that was why both hurriedly separated from each other even at the end. Sangwoo wiped his mouth with his sleeve and took a deep breath, while Jaeyoung stood leaning against the wall, adjusting his breathing.

   ‘Damn, we almost ate their lips, huh?’ He thought his heart would stop beating.

   ____________________________.

[1]                     Heo Sangjun, “허생전.” or the Story of Heo Sang, is a novel set

   in the 

   Joseon period written by Park Ji-won of Yanam. It tells the story of the protagonist, ‘Heo Sang,’ who monopolizes all the necessary goods in the market in order to control prices.

[2]                     Incubus is the name of a male demon believed to come and sleep with women during their deepest slumber to engage in sexual activities. If it is a female demon, it is called Succubus.

      SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Chapter 34 Cyan #7.

“Do you want something special to eat?”

“No.”

“I’ll have okonomiyaki, omurice, and two bottles of soju.”

Jaeyoung handed the return menu to the staff. The other party took it and disappeared behind the curtain.

On Saturday night, at a small Japanese restaurant in a corner, a quiet atmosphere suitable for conversation. Jaeyoung invited Sangwoo while on their way back home after finishing work part-time because of what happened yesterday, he couldn’t work all day. If he didn’t provoke him himself out of annoyance, that meant Chu Sangwoo secretly kissed him and ran away, he couldn’t understand it at all.

Sangwoo, who never deviated from his frame and plan, might be asexual, but Jaeyoung was certain that the other side couldn’t be gay. Besides, the only emotions he saw in those eyes were indifference. If you wanted to believe that it was the gaze of someone in love, struggling to admit that he was infatuated until he annoyed himself would be more accurate.

“Why did you suddenly come to drink?”

“We’ve been working together for two weeks, it’s time to socialize with colleagues.”

“Well… sure.”

After that, silence filled the air for a while. Now Jaeyoung was not sure if he felt or knew anything while Sangwoo sat in front of him. Whether

Sangwoo intended it or not, for the past two weeks, Jaeyoung had been attacked heavily to the point that the city walls crumbled, and the fortress was destroyed. He wanted to confirm where the destination of this conflicting feeling in his heart truly lay, so he prepared like this.

Jaeyoung’s favorite electronic song played softly from the speakers. Meanwhile, Sangwoo stared at the ceiling. Jaeyoung glanced at the side of the other party’s neck for a few seconds before regaining consciousness and turning his gaze elsewhere.

After a while, a staff member arrived with soju and glasses. Sangwoo looked like someone who had never participated in a drinking session before, but he casually picked up the bottle, shook it, and opened it. Jaeyoung received the glass from Sangwoo’s hand with a slight tremor in his heart.

The etiquette for pouring alcohol is to pour with the right hand and hold a cup with the left hand under the right wrist, use the back of the hand to cover when lifting it to drink, and keep the secrets discussed during the drinking session. These were perfect manners.

“Who taught you that?”

“My mother. She said if I don’t know, I’ll lose. As soon as I reached adulthood, she taught me right away.”

Now it’s Jaeyoung’s turn to pour the liquor. Sangwoo held a glass in one hand, while the other rested on his wrist. Even though Jaeyoung felt like they are a true university senior and his junior and should be somewhat reserved, he doesn’t say anything because he knows now that the other party needs to follow certain rules to feel satisfied, and the clear liquid flows smoothly into the glass of Soju.

They clinked glasses and drank together. Jaeyoung popped a few roasted peanuts into his mouth and looked at Sangwoo calmly with a poker face.

When there was nothing to say, he filled the glass with Soju for both of them.

And they let the Soju flow down their throats once again.

“You’re good at drinking.”

“I’m an enzyme that can metabolize acetate dehyde[1] well.”

“I thought you were someone who didn’t drink anymore.”

“Why is that?”

“When we were working together, you never drank.”

Sangwoo poured Soju into Jaeyoung’s glass, raising suspicions with a puzzled look on his face. Jaeyoung took the bottle of Soju and poured it into the other party’s glass before speaking.

“I was right there with you.”

“Oh, so back then, it was a bit nerve-wracking. Did hyungnim see it all?”

“Yeah, that’s right. I was the one who took out the battery from your cell phone.”

That guy… I was thinking about reporting him for theft, but since his personal history couldn’t be verified, I just let it go.”

Jaeyoung twitched a smile and popped a roasted peanut into his mouth.

“If I hadn’t stopped your representative from escaping, you wouldn’t have been able to run away.”

“And even now, you still want to thank me, don’t you?”

‘This kid, he’s just the same.’

It was only during their first encounter with Sangwoo that he felt flustered because he heard words like that. But now, he doesn’t feel anything anymore.

“Are you dumb or something? Who said you’re a coding genius? Oh, or is it because you’re a robot that you don’t understand human emotions?”

When Sangwoo heard Jaeyoung speak as he did before, a corner of his mouth curved into a smile, and the pupil that was visible vanished behind closed eyelids.

“…You’re so cute.”

Jaeyoung closed his eyes and let the Soju flow down his throat.

“Besides that time, I’ve met you many times before.”

“When? Tell me more.”

“A few years ago when we took the same course.”

“Really?”

“Well, I was once scammed by a guy in front of a shop… When I was in university, I asked him for an interview, but he rejected me.”

Sangwoo lifted the soju and drank it with a face as if he had just heard these stories for the first time. At that time, the staff member held a barrel of omurice with a wooden stick and served it. Dried fish was shrinking on a large plate.

“I’ve known you for a long time. Even though you haven’t remembered me for a long time and can’t remember my name either.”

“Did I really do that?”

“You called me Min Youngjae, didn’t you? When I thought about it, I ran out of words.”

Jaeyoung picked up a stick and bit into the omurice. Sangwoo sat still for a moment before doing the same. They ate and drank without saying anything for a while and ordered more.

“When I entered the office, there was a senior soldier named Kim Youngjae.  He was just like the other annoying seniors. So, I became confused, you know.” Sangwoo dug up painful memories, narrating them with a calm expression. However, it was because of that demeanor that Jaeyoung continued to address the topics that he often wondered about.

“Which department did you join?”

The Goyang unit [2]. Big guns.”

“Oh, the Cheonma unit. That place must have been intense for training, right?”

“Well, it was okay for me.”

Jaeyoung secretly thought that Sangwoo might not have adapted well to the military standards as an infantryman. Therefore, he felt surprised when the other party talked about military standards as if he didn’t feel anything.

“How’s life in the military? Besides Min Youngjae, is there anyone who bothers you?”

“That guy? When I got promoted to Sergeant Major, I transferred to another unit, and since then, I’ve been comfortable.”

“Why did you transfer?”

“When he acted annoying and gave orders without letting me rest, I could endure it, but he liked to pat me on the head. I wrote a complaint and put it in the complaint box, but it wasn’t resolved. So, I went to talk to the company commander, but even then, it couldn’t be resolved. So, I reported it to the military police.”

‘Scary kid, this one.’

“Did you have any conflicts with other soldiers?”

“If it’s not when we have to speak. I wouldn’t say anything at all. The army is already a place like that.”

“No problem at all?”

“It’s fine. With the remaining time, I’ve been able to study a lot. I’ve received marksmanship awards and excellent combat skills, joined the special forces, became an exemplary soldier, and even led a platoon. Your father even said I was born to be a soldier.”

‘That’s crazy.’

But if it’s Sangwoo, it seems like he can endure physical hardships well, unlike Jaeyoung who struggled in the military, from waking up early, useless gun cleaning every day, cold showers, restricted hairstyles, restricted clothing, confinement, dog-like food, hand-to-hand combat, marching, night watch, standing guard, meaningless tasks, he hated everything physically demanding. If it reached the point where deteriorating ancient culture is used, he wouldn’t know what to do, but even then, he still had to threaten the kid to make him afraid, pretending not to take advantage of his position.

“I used to be an assistant instructor.”

“Hmm… hyungnim you weren’t in a position to train someone else’s mental state, were you?”

“I thought so too, I was chosen because I’m over 180 cm tall.”

“The new soldiers looked down on me.”

They called me the toughest training assistant, that kid.”

“Hmph, don’t lie.”

“Only you think I’m worthless.”

Sangwoo remained silent for a moment.

“You’re not worthless at all.”

Then the silence engulfed them, both drinking without saying anything, after emptying glass after glass, the Soju bottle ended up empty with four bottles gone unnoticed. Jaeyoung blinked his eyes in a daze, Sangwoo held the Soju glass in his hand and turned slightly to the side. Then he poured Soju into his mouth, his posture as steady as ever.

‘Why is he so sexy…’

Stay calm, that kid is a guy. No matter how much he screamed in his heart or even glanced again, he still looked the same, with a slight blush on the other cheek and an especially red border on the lips. Jaeyoung moved his gaze from Sangwoo’s neck and stopped at the checkered pattern on his shirt. Sangwoo rolled up his shirt sleeves to open a new bottle of Soju, revealing his muscular arms. As the other twisted his white wrist, blue veins prominently appeared.

‘If blood flows like this, my nose will bleed, damn.’

He raised his hand and rubbed his face, the warmth not only from being drunk but also transmitted through the skin.

“Recommended game… Yaja Time[3].”

When Sangwoo heard the murmuring sound, Jaeyoung raised his head. The other side was pointing at the wall. Jaeyoung turned his head back and found a written message on the wall summarizing recommended drinking games with gameplay explanations. There were games like “King’s Cup.” “Thumb Master.”

“Charades.” and “Never Have I Ever.” Jaeyoung slowly turned back and met Sangwoo’s eyes, which were rarely seen so lively.

“Do you want to try playing?”

“Yes.”

“I’m actually quite interested.”

Sangwoo stared at him without answering the question, as if there was nothing he couldn’t do anymore… Jaeyoung responded to that proposal with delight. When he said, “Which one do you want to play?” Sangwoo immediately called his name.  “Jang Jaeyoung.”

________________________________________.

[1]      Acetaldehyde, a naturally occurring chemical found in water, air, alcoholic beverages, and certain foods.

[2]      Goyang, a province located in the northern part of South Korea.

[3]      Yaja Time, “Yaja, 타임”, is a game that allows younger people to speak without honorifics or freely interact with older individuals. Sometimes roles are swapped, for example, playing Yaja Time with an older sibling, the younger sibling becomes the older sibling, while the older sibling becomes the younger one.

   SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Chapter 33 Cyan #6.

   Daily Log <Observation Log of Chu Sangwoo>.

   (1.)

   Tuesday, April 8th, Day 5 of the office takeover.

   Room entry time: 18:31 / Room exit time: 22:00.

•                                                 Significant event: Choi Yoona vs. Chu Sangwoo.

   “Here, Chu Sangchu.”

   “Please do not change the nickname of others according to your whims.”

   “Why do you always act confused whenever I play a song, but when

   Jaeyoung plays, you don’t say anything?” Yoona started the scene with a fierce attack.

   “Because my senior, Jaeyoung, takes an average of 9 minutes during break time to make sure he takes his break. So I tolerate it. It’s different from some people who play songs for twenty-four hours straight, right? When I go back home, I turn off the sound sometimes. I feel sorry for the headset.”

   “…”

   Chu Sangwoo-Shield-Strike and Miss Choi Yoona Lost-Knockout.

•    Notable points: Resolving differences willingly, calling names, “speaking names”.
•    Opinion: Nothing abnormal or exceptional.

   (2.)

   Wednesday, April 9th, Day 6 of the office takeover.

   Room entry time: 18:31 / Room exit time: 22:00.

•    Significant event: When Chu Sangwoo was most angry.

   “If it keeps spinning like this, I might actually throw the computer screen out the window.”

   “I think you should seek treatment for your anger management issues a little bit, hyung.”

   Sangwoo struggles to distinguish between playfulness and reality.

   “Since when have you been the angriest? Try telling me three things.”

   Jaeyoung sensed that break time was about to end, so he deliberately brought up a new topic because if Sangwoo was asked, he would have to give a definite answer, as expected. The other party stared blankly at the ceiling, lost in thought.

   “Um… When you invited me to watch a movie.”

   “Would you say that was the angriest moment of your life?”

   This life has never been in crisis, right? Otherwise, just watching a movie would affect your mind that much, huh?

   “Yes. As for the second point… It’s about washing my face in the bathroom during the first break of the “Embedded System” class this semester.”

   Oh, both the first and second ranks, huh? Jaeyoung stayed quiet, thinking that he was digging his own grave.

   “The third point is about the swimming competition in sixth grade.”

   “Why? Because it wasn’t there in the first place?”

   “It was in first place.”

   “Then why?”

   “I hate myself for only remembering up to 622. After that, I tried to remember until 1024, sir, but if I try to remember more than that, it feels like a waste of time, so I stopped.”

   “You’re not ordinary either. Seriously.”

•    Notable observation: Confirm once again that he accurately remembers negative memories of the opposing faction.
•    Opinion: There’s nothing unusually special.

   (3.)

   Thursday, April 10th, Day 7 of occupying the office.

   Entered the room at 18:31 / Left the room at 20:25.

•    Significant event: Platinum and Diamond.

   At that time, the UI, characters, items, effects, maps, and the game world were all completed. Although there were still many pages and UI elements to work on, it was a normal thing to want a break from the exhaustion and to enjoy a sense of relief after completing a major project. Whether it succeeds or not. Jaeyoung was still exhausted.

   “Let’s investigate the data.”

   “Please explain in plain terms.”

   “It’s about inviting you to experience the movement in games and the feeling of playing games from other successful companies, analyzing the pros and cons. Then we can discuss, draw inspiration in terms of art, and explore the success in popularity from players. At the same time, it’s a way to strengthen relationships within the team and relieve stress.”

   Sangwoo sat there quietly, seeming not to understand what Jaeyoung was saying.

   “Are you inviting me to play games?”

   ‘This kid, he understands quickly now.’

   “Go for about two hours and then come back, the postponed work, tomorrow will make it all complete, promise.”

   “Do you believe me?”

   “Of course, I don’t believe you.”

   When exhausted and irritated, Sangwoo began to believe that data exploration was necessary… but in reality, Jaeyoung had a hidden intention. He was used to being the one carrying the game because he excelled at almost every game. Everyone wanted to be on the same team as Jaeyoung, so he was quite proud. Another thing is that this is an opportunity to use gaming skills to gain respect from Chu Sangwoo, who is not easily impressed by skateboards.

   They went to the internet cafe where Sangwoo worked. The owner of the cafe was delighted to see Sangwoo as a customer for the first time and offered them free drinks.

   “What should we play?”

   “Play the game that you want to play. I can play any online game released in the market.”

   “What have you been playing a lot lately… PUBG? OW? LOL? Which game are you best at?”

   “PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds and Overwatch. That’s fine. As for

   League of Legends, I’m not that good. I haven’t played it in a while.”  “Then let’s play that game.”

   Jaeyoung teased, but Sangwoo happily replied, “Let’s do this” And doubleclicked to enter the game.

   Jaeyoung chose a stealth assassin character who could continuously attack and had strong offensive power, while Sangwoo chose a support tank character with utility benefits despite its unimpressive appearance.

   While waiting for the game to start, Sangwoo accessed the game’s information website to view detailed skill sets of various characters and item details. Meanwhile, Jaeyoung was so engrossed in reading webtoons that he was startled when the game loading window popped up.

   “You said you’re not good, but you made it to the Grandmaster rank?”

   That meant Sangwoo was a high-level player in the top 1-2% of the previous season… Jaeyoung was even sweating.

   The villainous plot emerged in the game. While Jaeyoung relied on the spirit of animals and the physical abilities of his character, Sangwoo meticulously calculated the enemy’s movements to secure victory.

   “Can’t you calculate the damage of the skills [2]?”

   “Can’t you calculate the cooldown of the opposing team’s skills [3]?”

   “When I tell the gang [4], we have to trade [5 ]and reduce the enemy’s movements.”

   “Why is CS [6] like that in the middle of the game?”

   “If it’s not time to kill, just collect the flesh and keep it for a while.”

   In those two hours, Sangwoo didn’t scold even once. He only used a calm tone to reprimand Jaeyoung. The excellent gameplay that Jaeyoung usually demonstrated to everyone turned into mere fumbling when faced with Sangwoo. The gameplay that had been based on instinct seemed to transform into a helpless experience without calculation. Finally, going outside to change the atmosphere had no meaning. The atmosphere remained the same as when they were in the office room.

   It is not advisable to approach Chu Sangwoo with “PUBG.” “OW.” “LOL.” or “StarCraft.” Jaeyoung kept this note in mind.

   “What the heck, why would you invite me to play KartRider [7.]?”

•    Notable observation: Chu Sangwoo is a genius at playing games.
•    Opinion: There’s nothing unusually special.

   (4.)

   Friday, April 11th, Day 8 of occupying the office.

   Entered the room at 18:31 / Left the room at 22:02.

•    Significant event: A kiss?

   At that time, it was around 3:30 AM after finishing the status window, inventory, and skill window. Jaeyoung was completely exhausted. He told Sangwoo that he would take a 15-minute break. Then he lay down on the folding bed and fell asleep for a moment.

   “Hyung, it’s time for me to go back.”

   Then he was awakened by Sangwoo’s voice, but because he was still drowsy, he intentionally pretended to be asleep. Jaeyoung felt too weak to bid farewell to Sangwoo and ask him to go home. After a while, he heard the sound of items being collected from the table.

   “Wake up. Will you finish the roulette and title today?”

   That voice came from afar. Even though the tone was harsh, he enjoyed listening to it.

   “Are you still sleeping?”

   The other side asked, but Jaeyoung didn’t answer.

   “Hyung, are you sleeping?”

   It was still the same question, but the voice sounded slightly closer.

   “Sleeping… Are you really sleeping?”

   The voice came closer. What is it? Is he going to write on my face again? In order to startle Sangwoo, Jaeyoung decided to pretend to continue sleeping.

   “Are you really asleep, hyungnim?”

   Hyungnim… 

   That word made Jaeyoung think that he could not let go of his previous intention to tease the other side. It was like being attacked by a skill that immobilized in all forms, turning into hints, stunned, slowed down, transformed into stone, stopped time, causing confusion. Jaeyoung felt that Sangwoo, who was right in front of him, had closed his eyes tightly and carefully examined his own face.

   “Are you for real?”

   The voice was faint, barely reaching the tip of the nose. Sangwoo’s hot breath fogged up his glasses, and the tip of his fingers grazed his forehead and slid through his hair. What was this situation? Jaeyoung breathed faster but still pretended to be asleep, continuing the drama with a calm heart.

   The difficult and enduring phase continued. Jaeyoung thought that if he had to endure more than this, his face would have stiffened and twitched, so he decided to turn over and lie on his side. At that moment, there was something soft touching the corner of his mouth.

   He endured without opening his eyes, maintaining his composure beyond human limits.

   Then, something slipped away. When he opened his eyes, Chu Sangwoo’s back had disappeared behind the door silently.

•    Noteworthy point: Fskhdfaskfhasf, are we going to kill each other?
•    Comment: *Clearly detected signs of abnormalities*.

   ⌘W.

   ________________________________________.

[1]      Tank. A character with high health or skills that can absorb attacks for teammates, likened to a frontline fortress, suitable for opening combat scenes for the team.

[2]      Skill damage. The amount of damage caused by using a skill.

[3]      Cooldown. In the game, it refers to one of the game’s mechanics, a period of time that players have to wait to use the same skill again.

[4]      Gank. The act of one or more players sneaking up and attacking another player in a different lane. This term is often used for players in the jungle position “the position that focuses on killing monsters to earn money for item purchases in the jungle” because players in this position are responsible for helping manage players on their team in each lane to give an advantage to their own team.

[5]      Trade. An exchange of attacks to prevent being at a disadvantage by being continuously attacked by only one side. It is often used in engagements where different sides attack each other, like gun duels in cowboy movies.

[6]      CS “Creep Score”. The number of creeps killed by each player. It has a significant impact on the in-game economy, and a higher CS gives the team a better chance of winning, especially for the carry position, which is the main offensive force of the team. Note that creeps include both monsters and minions in the game.

   KartRider, or its full name, CrazyRacing, KartRider, is an online racing game from South Korea.

      SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Chapter 32 Cyan #5.

   On the first day, Sangwoo was calm and quiet. He returned within an hour, leaving abruptly without getting a chance to react.

   But from the second day onwards, Sangwoo switched to demon mode and made decisions. After finishing dinner, Sangwoo took out the notebook that

   Jaeyoung had organized and started laying it out on the frame[1] he created. Jaeyoung was working on the map after creating characters, weapons, and effects, so he thought of taking a break for a while, but every time he did that, he would be scolded.

   ‘If you want to work with me, you have to keep up with the speed.’

   ‘Like a professional, right? Can you work with a mindset like that?’

   ‘Stop shaking your leg, please.’

   ‘Get up and sit properly.”

   ‘Do you see how much work has been done? Are you still looking for more?’

   ‘I’ve given it some thought. Why didn’t you say from the beginning that you wouldn’t do it?’

   Besides his impressive graphic design skills, it seemed like Sangwoo didn’t like anything about Jaeyoung. He had been picking on him for the past three days. Now, no matter what he heard, Jaeyoung reached a point where he didn’t care anymore.

   ‘Of course. I will do as President Chu wishes.’

   ‘Oh, my lord, should I dare to challenge you?’

   ‘You’re no different from a delinquent, just without the knife.’

   ‘Let’s see… Ministry of Labor’s phone number…’

   ‘If this computer breaks down tomorrow, I’ll know it’s because of you.’

   ‘This is the Aoji coal mine [2], isn’t it?’

   Avoiding conflict was inevitable because they had a lot of work to do according to Sangwoo’s schedule. Even though he promised to keep up, the other side seemed skeptical. If they started arguing, Yoona would curse once and put on her headphones, but Jaeyoung didn’t mind bringing Sangwoo into the workspace. Even though the other side murmured discontentedly, in reality, he seemed to enjoy it even more.

   “Let’s rest for fifteen minutes.”

   After placing the mouse carelessly and lazily, Jaeyoung encountered Sangwoo again on Monday after the Saturday-Sunday break.

   During the weekend, he had a basketball game and went out for drinks.  After finishing the game, he left the post-game gathering before anyone else, which earned him the nickname “Cinderella.” As for the drinking appointment, he couldn’t make it because he was busy, so he got scolded when he returned. Even though he corrected the mistakes and sent complete maps of all five locations, he still asked for a fifteen-minute break. But Sangwoo still didn’t seem satisfied.

   “Okay, then.”

   After agreeing, Sangwoo would wait for exactly fifteen minutes and then order him to go back to work. Jaeyoung immediately went to the folding bed located on one side of the workspace as soon as he received permission and moved Yoona’s clothes from there to the floor before lying down.

   Sangwoo sat upright and stared at the computer screen filled with text, tapping the keyboard. Now he was somewhat used to seeing the other side in the workspace during the evening.

   “You should also take a break.”

   “I have a lot of work to do.”

   “I didn’t mean that, I meant take a break, do something else.”

   “With so much work, how can I take a break?”

   “If we keep talking, we won’t be able to concentrate, so I am considering it a break.”

   “In England in the 1850s, trees became infected and turned dark, causing a decrease in the population of gray moths. Meanwhile, the population of black moths increased.”

   “…What are you trying to say?”

   “Living organisms adapt to external threats, my friend.”

   “Oh, I see. So I’m the pollution, and you’re the pitiful gray moth? Well, I’m changing my wing color too. I’ll be an inspiration.”

   “You don’t need to inspire me with words, just keep your mouth shut and that might help me.”

   Chu Sangwoo was like an automated vending machine that only sold accurate words. Jaeyoung avoided losing arguments right from the start and picked up his phone, responding to a few text messages before opening a music video by his favorite band. When he was with Yoona or Seo-jin, they would always play their music loudly while working, but ever since Sangwoo came, they never played music again. Yoona herself protested a couple of times, but after losing every argument boldly, she would sigh and put on her headphones when Sangwoo arrived. But today, she left quickly, so such an event didn’t occur.

   The sound of synthesizers [3] that seemed dream-like, the deep bass drum beats that made the ground tremble, the guitar that resonated with the heart, and the singing voice that invited dreams. Jaeyoung closed his eyes and drowned in the music. In his other mind, he waited for the words, “Turn off the song.” When he peeked up with forgotten eyes, he realized that Sangwoo was still sitting there working.

   “Looks like you’re a fan of this band.”

   “Not really. It’s not a big deal.”

   “This band is called…”

   “Psychedelic. I know them.”

   “The name of the song is…”

   “Magnetic Field, Philadelphian, Track 8. On their 5th album, Electric City. I already knew that. Just stay quiet.”

   Jaeyoung was so surprised that he dropped his headphones. The artist he liked wasn’t well-known in a country of this size, let alone knowing the song titles, but here he knew even the album name and track order. He pretended not to care, but he actually knew everything like this, appearing as a knowledgeable listener. While Jaeyoung was still amazed, the playlist shifted to the next song, this time an indie band from a country not widely recognized.

   “‘Napalsu’, Album 2, Track 12, ‘I Will Chase the President and Kick Out the

   Company’.”

   Jaeyoung stared at the black cap for a minute.

   ‘Does Chu Sangwoo have the same taste as me?’

   Unbelievable. Jaeyoung moved on to the next song with an excited heartbeat.

   “‘Jochiwon Band’, Album 1, ‘Red and Black’, Track 7, ‘Red Star.’“

   “Hmm… Hey, you and I have very similar tastes, huh? I am feeling all goosey-bumpey.”

   “Not at all, don’t talk like that.”

   Judging from the dissatisfaction, the other party probably didn’t lie. He must have listened enough to know the song’s sequence. Jaeyoung was so excited that he kept skipping songs, and there wasn’t a single song that Sangwoo didn’t know. Whether it’s artists from the country or abroad. No matter what genre. There’s no need to tell Sangwoo, he knows, and he’s more accurate than using a voice search app repeatedly.

   Jaeyoung skipped songs randomly. Then he accidentally touched an unfamiliar song that jumped up to be the number one hit on the weekly chart, which the other party mentioned within the first ten seconds of playing the song, but this time it was quietly skipped.

   “Don’t know this song.”

   “How can I?”

   These days, if someone doesn’t know this song, they can be called truly clueless. Jaeyoung felt a little conflicted in his heart and was confused.

   “Hyung, don’t worry about the hand grenade. Fix that first and then watch the corn again. Also, it’s been fifteen minutes already. Go back and sit there, please.”

   ‘Hey, I’ll kick you.’

   Jaeyoung sat still for five seconds before getting up. When he reluctantly sat back down on the chair, Sangwoo glanced at him briefly. Then he shifted his gaze back to his own notebook.

   ‘Cute, but not cute at all.’

   Jaeyoung reached out his hand, intending to pinch the other party’s cheek forcefully before remembering the ban and retracting his hand. Sangwoo raised an eyebrow and glanced at Jaeyoung’s hand. Jaeyoung awkwardly waved his hand and clapped in the air.

   “Huh? There’s a mosquito here…”

   “It’s April, how can there be mosquitoes?”

   “There it is here.”

   “Where did the mosquito come from? Did you catch it?”

   “Huh? Missed it.”

   Sangwoo went back and tapped the keyboard again with a reluctant expression. While staring at the computer screen filled with unreadable text, he looked around, knowing everything. Jaeyoung, on the other hand, looked back at Sangwoo without doing anything for a moment.

   “Why are you making a game?”

   After blurting out that question, he realized it was too late, it was a question that should have been asked from the beginning.

   Why does Chu Sangwoo try to create games? Especially when he doesn’t understand anything about the actual content. On the other hand, he’s only good at programming, but it seems like he has no sense of graphics or sound at all. Furthermore, someone who is unsuitable for teamwork and doesn’t enjoy working as a team is making a game that requires designers or planners.

   “Because I like it.”

   The answer that came out made Jaeyoung slightly shocked, judging from the other person’s strong and determined expression. Jaeyoung thought he probably didn’t have any hobbies or things he liked.

   “I have a game company that I want to work for. When I was fifteen, I tried playing a game released by that company for the first time, and it was so much fun that it enlightened me for the first time. Since then, my dream has changed. I want to make a game similar to that game with my own hands, so I studied English and studied more about games.”

   When Sangwoo saw Jaeyoung’s face, he said, “Oh, I didn’t ask, sir.” and turned back to look at the computer screen. Jaeyoung laughed and patted his face.

   “No, you just looked cooler all of a sudden earlier. So, what game are you talking about?” “StarCraft 1.”

   If he goes to an internet cafe with Chu Sangwoo, playing “StarCraft” is a must. Jaeyoung kept it in mind.

   “What did you want to be before becoming a game developer?”

   “A backhoe driver.”

   “…”

   Today, he learned many things. Chu Sangwoo was not just a robot immersed in work, but a human being who liked music and had dreams. Yes, for the first time, he saw Sangwoo’s eyes filled with desire.

   “I plan to use the success of Veggie Venturer to apply for a job at the company in the second half of next year.”

   “You said that it’s a portfolio for me like this, in the end, it’s your own portfolio, isn’t it?”

   “Well, it’s good for both of us, isn’t it?”

   Jaeyoung felt as if the game they started working on together had already achieved success through their busy schedule that seemed never-ending. But he didn’t know why he felt that it was more than confidence, more than Chu Sangwoo’s dream. It may not be easy, but it doesn’t mean it’s impossible.

   When the feeling was unbearable, Jaeyoung wanted to create something.

   “Here.”

   “Yes.”

   “Give me one more minute, please.”

   “…”

   Sangwoo remained silent for a moment, and the fact that the other party didn’t refuse immediately surprised him. Jaeyoung had been waiting patiently, but there was still no answer.

   “If you don’t like it, forget it.”

   When he spoke, Sangwoo cleared his throat.

   “I don’t really dislike anything so much. I just prefer to be informed in advance.”

   Compared to before, the other party seemed softer and more gentle. Jaeyoung felt the urge to reach out and touch that black cap right now.

   “You should prepare yourself first.”

   “I have to prepare myself. I don’t like things that are unprepared.”

   “If you’re studying and suddenly your grandmother calls to say she misses you, so you come here and wait in front of the house. What would you do?”

   “I don’t use my phone while studying, and both my grandma and grandpa have passed away.”

   “‘Sorry. If that’s the case, let me give you another example… If you’re cooking ramen but don’t have any seasoning?”

   “Before cooking, I would check if all the ingredients listed in the recipe are available because there’s no way to make it without those.”

   “So you’re good at cooking ramen, huh?”

   “How could I not cook ramen? Anyone can do it as long as they have two hands and enough common sense to read the recipe.”

   “Well, even if that’s the case, there are many people who can’t cook it deliciously… Oh, it’s time.”

   Jaeyoung reached out his hand confidently and lightly touched Sangwoo’s cap. After going through the additional step of giving advance notice, he gently rubbed the other party’s head and felt a sense of satisfaction, almost wanting to rub his shoulder, but for now, it was enough.

   “I’ll support your sports dream myself and help you reach the other side.”

   The whispered words didn’t come out smoothly, perhaps because they were too heartfelt. The voice was faint and almost disappeared.

   “I feel like I want to do better.”

   Sangwoo sat there blinking as if he didn’t hear anything, and two seconds later the other party shook his head and waved Jaeyoung’s hand.

   “That’s enough.”

   Suddenly, Sangwoo folded his notebook and packed up in a hurry. He had seen the side of the other person’s face for about three minutes and thought that the other side probably wouldn’t turn around to show his face. When he looked at the time, he realized it was only half-past three.

   ‘Yesterday I came back at four o’clock…’

   Sangwoo put everything in his bag before quickly getting up and walking away, making it seem like there was no one in the room. Sangwoo stopped at the door and spoke without turning back.

   “I’m leaving. See you at the meeting next time.”

   ‘The meeting next time… I already said that you can just say it’s tomorrow.’

   “Uh… Take care.”

   Jaeyoung stared at the back of Sangwoo’s head, and after a moment, he heard the sound of the iron door closing, bang.

   Jaeyoung rubbed his face with his hand before letting his gaze wander up to the ceiling. Ah, what else did he do for the benefit of someone who doesn’t  like skins? Does he have to do it like that? But even so, there are strange

   points in Sangwoo’s reactions.

   “I feel like smoking.”

   The conflicting feeling that couldn’t be explained overwhelmed Jaeyoung’s mind. He thought he had to pay more attention to Sangwoo.

   ⌘W.

   ________________________________________.

[1]                   Resource: Programs, data, or equipment that can be used. In this case, it refers to the image files that Jaeyoung made.

[2]                   Aoji Coal Mine: Located in the region of Aoji in North Korea.

[3]                   Synthesizer: Sound synthesizing device.

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