EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter  11: Christmas

   “If that’s the case…can I ask for your LINE ID too?”    Phii Hill…?

   The tall figure stood up from his seat, amidst the bewildered looks of the secondyear moon group. Phii Hill walked around the table to stand beside Phii Jijo, right in front of me and Phii Meili.

   “What’s with you, Hill? How could you do this?” Phii Jijo asked, mixed with surprise.    “Why not?”

“Well, I asked for his Line first. You can’t just cut in like this, man.”

“Why can’t I?” Phii Hill said calmly, though his eyes still showed a trace of anger he was trying to hold back, “Are you his boyfriend or something? Why would you have the right to cut others off?”

Phii Hill’s words seemed to reiterate what Phii Jijo had just said.

If you’re not his boyfriend…you don’t have the right to cut others off.

“Wow, what’s this? Don’t you already have someone you like?” Phii Jijo started to protest slightly.

“Don’t you already have someone to chat with?” Phii Hill retorted, which made Phii Jijo start to frown, but neither seemed truly angry; it was more like friends playfully arguing over something trivial.

“Alright, alright, both of you stop it. Medical Moon and Law Moon, it’s time to go practice the walk. C’mon, let’s go, it’s almost time.” Phii Meili tried to intervene, clearly annoyed at having to listen to this pointless argument. “Everyone, let’s move, or Phii Napdao will get mad and we’ll be late again. We might end up practicing until ten tonight, you never know.” she concluded. Her words prompted the moon group to reluctantly get up from their seats with bored expressions, obliged to prepare for the walk practice that they couldn’t avoid.

“Come on, Jijo.” one senior came over, put an arm around Phii Jijo’s neck, and pulled him along.

“Hey, wait up, I haven’t settled this with this doctor guy yet.” Phii Jijo protested as he was being dragged away by his friend.    “That’s enough from you.”

“Nong Ter, let’s talk later.” Phii Jijo, or Jo, shouted to me, “Hill, don’t be sneaky, okay?” Jo left his parting shot before walking away with the other stars.

“Hill, you need to lead, man.”

“Go ahead.”

“Yeah, yeah, hurry up.”

Phii Hill, who should have gone with the others who were heading backstage, stayed standing in front of me, not moving. He looked at me with an unreadable expression, but without the anger he had shown before.

Phii Hill said nothing.

I didn’t dare to say anything either.

Including Phii Meili, who seemed to be waiting for some conversation to happen between us.

“Have you eaten yet?” Phii Hill’s question surprised me. I thought he would bring up the earlier incident, but his deep, soft voice had returned to its usual warmth.

“Uh…no.”

“Don’t you like the boxed meals here?”

“…No.”

“Do you want to eat something outside?”

“It’s okay.”

“Then let’s go eat together later. Meili, can I leave the junior with you for a bit?” Phii Hill turned to ask Phii Meili, who looked slightly surprised.

“Of course, Doctor. Meili has been looking after juniors since Bua’s time.” Phii Meili said with pride, “I can take care of him all the time. He’s part of our team now. In exchange, I will borrow the doctor’s summary sheets.”

“Um, sure.” Phii Hill gave a slight smile in acknowledgment, “Even though the sun isn’t too strong, don’t stay in it for more than thirty minutes, okay?”

“Got it, got it, such concern, I’ll make sure to hold an umbrella over him.” Phii Meili’s tone was half-sarcastic, half-annoyed. Phii Hill gave a polite smile before joining the others backstage.

Then Phii Meili dragged me back to the staff’s eating table and told me to wait while she checked if there were any meals left in the bags, unsure if the staff had eaten everything.

“There’s only fried rice left, do you like it?”

“Thank you, Phii.” I nodded in thanks as Phii Meili placed the lunch box on the table and sat down opposite me. I picked up a plastic spoon and started to eat the fried rice from the Foam box with relish. The taste wasn’t bad at all, but when I noticed Phii Meili staring, it almost made me lose my appetite.

“Wh-why are you looking at me?”    “Nothing! Nothing at all!”

“Your voice went high there.” I remarked.

“I wonder who might tell this Meili anything, you know, I want to know the details.”

“Haha.” I couldn’t help but laugh at Phii Meili’s cute, indirect way of asking, but she clearly wanted to know, “So, what does Phii Meili want to know?”

“Since it’s come to this, tell me, is the person Dr. Hill has been posting about and talking about recently you, Nong Ter?” Phii Meili got straight to the point.

“Uh…I don’t know.” but I still wasn’t brave enough to confirm it directly.

“Here’s the evidence.” she pointed at the watch mark on my wrist, “Why aren’t you wearing your watch? You usually wear it every day, right? That’s why there’s such a clear mark.” Phii Meili looked at me as if probing for an answer. It seemed she was determined to extract the truth from me.

“Uh…yes.” I had to admit it reluctantly.

“Admitted it, so it’s you, right?” Phii Meili’s eyes sparkled like she had just solved a great mystery.

“Yes…” I frowned slightly, “Can Phii Meili not tell anyone, please?”

“Why not? Don’t you want others to know that much?”

“I don’t want that.” I said softly. Phii Meili gently placed her left hand on the table, then her expression turned serious.    “Not ready, or what?”

“Yes, not ready at all.” I made a troubled face, and Phii Meili’s smile brightened up.

“Alright, Dr. Hill is probably waiting for you to be ready.” she leaned back into her chair, “I can’t believe it’s you. At first, we were all guessing, even thought it might be someone from another college.”

“So, what now? Can you tell me a bit about how Dr. Hill courted you? I can’t believe he knows how to court someone. Seriously, the whole crew was shocked when he posted that first time with the hashtag #DoctorPayingTheWay.”

I thought for a moment; I felt I could trust Phii Meili. Since she already knew, it wouldn’t hurt to tell her a little bit. I recounted to Phii Meili the same story I told North, about how I liked him since high school,  Christmas (my sister) incident, and added the recent events too.

When  he said…he liked me five years ago.

“Wow, five years, really? I barely lasted two months before finding someone new.” Phii Meili looked shocked, as if she couldn’t believe her ears, “So that means…Doctor Hill liked Nong Ter even before you knew him?”

“It doesn’t…seem possible. Phii Hill only transferred to my school in high school.”

“Oh really? Then maybe you met before that.”

“How can you like someone just from meeting them?” I voiced my thoughts. I don’t remember knowing Phii Hill before that. If it’s just from meeting, it’s hard to believe he could like me, “Plus, when Phii Hill first transferred, we didn’t even talk. I’m not someone who stands out to be well-known.”    “So, Nong Ter, you think…that Dr. Hill was lying?”

“Uh…I don’t know.” I answered hesitantly.

“He’s not lying…I think there might be more to the story that Doctor Hill hasn’t told.” Phii Meili speculated.

“At first, Phii Hill was going to tell me.” I paused, “but I…wasn’t brave enough to hear the whole truth.” My words made Phii Meili let out a big sigh.

“Sigh…this gives me a headache.” Phii Meili held her temples, “And your little sister, what’s her name again, Christmas? Doctor Hill said he only thinks of her as a sibling, right?”

“Yes…”

“But Christmas is like Doctor Hill.”

“Yes.”

“How do you know?”

“She’s the one who asked me to help…pursue Phii Hill.”

“Wow, a tragic love triangle, huh? That’s dramatic, I can’t believe Doctor Hill would have such a moment.” Phii Meili put her hand over her heart, “But still, it’s complicated. Doctor Hill says he only thinks of Christmas as a sibling, but he’s liked Ter for five years. And Ter likes Doctor Hill too, so that makes

Christmas…the extra, doesn’t it?”

“Uh…I wouldn’t say that.”

“Oh, poor little monkey.”

“But I think Phii Hill seems to like Christmas too.” I shared what I had been thinking all along.

“Not necessarily, haven’t you noticed? Have you ever tried talking to Christmas about it?”

“No…since that day we fought. It’s been almost a year since we’ve talked.” I sighed quietly, then clenched my lips to dispel the old memories that were flooding back.

“Oh, siblings not talking for almost a year?”

“Yes…”

“Why?”

“I thought…turning our backs on each other would be the best option for us, to prevent the wounds from getting any deeper.”

“It’s true that to move forward, one must let go of the past, but sometimes…it’s the past that blocks our way, especially if it’s a past that has hurt us. Some wounds, time can’t heal.”

“…”

“It’s a wound we have to heal ourselves.”

“I’m not saying anything against Nong Ter…but we can’t run away from problems forever.”

“…”

Phii Meili’s words left me speechless…because deep down, I knew I had been avoiding the problem, and I had never had the courage to face it head-on.

“Why don’t you try calling Christy…try talking, things might get better.” Phii Meili smiled at me gently, which made me feel comforted…Having someone you can trust is truly wonderful.

I took out my phone, searched for my sister’s number, remembering that I had blocked her in anger after our fight that day.

(Number blocked) – Christy

   I unblocked the number and dialed it. Today was a day off, hoping Christy would pick up.

Ring…

The sound of the phone ringing made me start to feel anxious.

She…she picked up.

“…”

“Hey…Chris, it’s your brother.” The other end didn’t say anything, so I had to speak first.

“Sniff…Sniff…Phii…”

“Chris…are you crying? Why are you crying?”

“Phii…I’m sorry…sniff…I’m sorry.”

And the trembling, tearful voice of my little sister made me want to cry along with her.

I could only stay silent, not daring to say anything while listening to her cry on the other end of the line. It was a familiar sound, but one I hadn’t heard in years. I missed her so much. I could picture her face, now stained with tears.    Chris can be bratty and stubborn, sometimes not very lovable,    but we always stick together.

“I’m…sorry too.” I managed to say in a shaky voice into the phone, my heart starting to feel tumultuous. Soon, the sobbing on the other end quieted down.

“Phii…are you not mad at me anymore?” Chris’s voice was as shaky as mine.

“No…wasn’t it you who was mad at me?”

“Yes. I was mad then…but I’m over it now.”

“Really? That’s good to hear. How are you doing?”

“I’m studying a lot, I’ve decided to study nursing.”

“That’s great, you finally made your choice.”

“Yeah, and how about you?”

“I’m waiting for the semester to start. Right now, there are lots of activities.” I found myself smiling slightly, unknowingly. We felt more like siblings who hadn’t seen each other in a long time rather than siblings who had been angry and not speaking.

“How is it there? Is it cold? Here it’s really hot, mom’s making watermelon juice every day, my face is almost turning into a watermelon.”

“Your face is already round like a watermelon.” I teased, just like we used to.

“Wait and see. I’ve lost weight now, my face isn’t chubby anymore.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes…and…I heard Phii Hill is studying medicine there…right?” Chris’s voice softened as if she was hesitant to bring up this topic.

“Oh…yes.”

“Have you…met him or not?”

“…I have.”

“He will become a doctor now…but Phii Hill has always been suited to be a doctor.”

“Yeah, he’s suited.”

“I checked his face on social media, Phii Hill is also the Moon of the Faculty, isn’t that amazing? He must be just as hot there as he was here, right?”

“I think…even hotter than before.”

Then silence began to replace our conversation. Christy didn’t say anything; it seemed that talking about Phii Hill was reopening old wounds for both of us.    “…I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“No, it’s okay…I called to talk about this anyway.” I said truthfully. Even though time had dulled the anger, the traces of pain still lingered.

“Yes…that’s what I wanted to apologize for.” my sister’s voice started to tremble again, “Back then, it was my fault, I was selfish, I shouldn’t have done that…hiccup…at all.”

“Hey…don’t cry.”

“I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have meddled in your affairs from the start. The reason you had to leave home was because of me, it’s my fault, hiccup…”

“No…it’s not your fault, not at all.” I started to feel anxious, as if Christy was crying harder and harder. What kind of brother am I to let my sister cry alone like this?

“I shouldn’t have interfered…with your business at all…sob.”

“Calm down, Christy, what business did you interfere with?”

“Well…the matter between you and Phii Hill…hiccup…”

“Between me and Phii Hill? …How?”

“Well, I…I was the one who got involved in what was happening between you two.”

“Wait a minute. Between us? Not between you and Phii Hill?”

“Huh? No.” Christy seemed surprised by what she heard, “Not me…you…Don’t tell me you didn’t know?”

“Know what?”

“About who Phii Hill…likes.”

“Doesn’t he like you, Christy?” I asked in confusion, am I misunderstanding something here?

“…You’re really crazy! So dense, how can you not see it even after all that!?” Christy seemed to shift her mood from sad to irritated with me instead. Why would she call her brother dense? “Sigh…I thought you knew…you, my brother is blind, isn’t you?”

“Hold on…just tell me then. What’s the deal?”

“Sigh…you’ve made me stop crying.” Christy sighed deeply, “Don’t you really know who Phii Hill likes?”

“Well…honestly, no.”

“Oh, well, let’s say it’s not me then.”

“Then who is it?” The part where Phii Hill said he liked me for five years, I’ll keep that to myself for now, let’s get the story from Christy first.    “Oh. I don’t want to talk to you anymore. Go ask Phii Hill yourself.”    “Hey, why are you suddenly angry?” I forgot to mention that Christy is quite moody. Just a moment ago she was sobbing, wasn’t she?

“Have you met Phii Hill?”    “Yes, I have.”

“Good. Have you talked?”

“What’s good about that…we’ve talked a bit.”

“Who initiated the conversation?”

“Phii Hill.”

“How did you meet?”

“I’m working at the club, Phii Hill is the president there.” Why ask?

“What did you talk about?”

“We talked about…general stuff, I guess.” We talked a lot, how should I answer that?

“Did he ask about me?”

“Uh…” I paused for a moment, thinking whether to tell her, “He did…I asked about you.” I decided to tell the truth.    “How did you ask?”

“I asked…what he thought…about it.” my voice softened inadvertently, and I was starting to not dare to say it out loud.

“And what did Phii Hill say?”

“…” I didn’t dare to tell her what I had asked. Phii Hill had said he only thought of her as a sister. Even though I could say that Phii Hill didn’t like Christy, Christy had liked Phii Hill before.

“He only thinks of me as a sister, right?”

“Yeah. That’s it, I shouldn’t have asked, I’m sorry.” I apologized to my sister, feeling guilty.

“It’s okay, I’ve known for a long time that Phii Hill didn’t feel that way about me.

He was pretty clear about it.” Christy’s voice didn’t sound sad, unlike what I had expected, “I did like Phii Hill, but I’ve come to terms with it now.”

“Because I also love you, and if the two people I love are happy, that makes me happy too.” Christy said cheerfully. If the people you love are happy, then you’re happy too, huh? Christy has really grown strong. I feel like I’ve been the weaker one here.

“Then there’s only you and Phii Hill left…I’ve moved on with Jo.”

“Why us?”

“Sigh…it’s nothing, really. I’m so glad we could finally talk. Are you coming back home?”

“I think I will…I miss home too, but I don’t know when.”

“Dad’s not angry anymore.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, but he’s still a bit stubborn, you know how old folks can be.”

“If he’s really not angry, that’s good then. I’ll try to visit home during the school break.”

“Yay, that’s great. I’ll tell Mom to plan a welcome party for you.”

“Wow, you are always over the top.”

“Just a little, I’ve got to go now, I have a tutorial class. Take care of yourself, okay?”

“Wait, what about Phii Hill? You haven’t told me.”

“Hmm…I do want to tell, but Phii Hill probably wants to say it himself. Have you had any special conversations up to this point? Like something Phii Hill has never said or done before, something that would surprise you?”

“I guess there were…” I tried to recall from when I first met him, “Like…asking to date, holding hands, acting a bit possessive, but still, he takes care of others the same way as always.”

“What do you mean by saying the same? Phii Hill is cold as ice to others, didn’t you notice? But he does what’s polite, sometimes anyway.”

“But he takes care of you too, doesn’t he? Like when you missed the bus, Phii

Hill went to pick her up and brought her home.”

“That’s because I’m your sister.”

“…?”

“I think I understand what Phii Hill is doing now.”

“Understand what? I still don’t get it.”

“People can’t wait forever, when the time comes, we need to act…on what we once let slip away. If it comes back into our hands, we must hold onto it tighter this time, like mom always said about ‘time and opportunity.’ For some people, this might be the opportunity they’ve been waiting for. You…try to observe what’s around you too, okay? I’ve got to go, we’ll talk later.”

And then Christy hung up, leaving her last words echoing in my mind.

Observe what’s around me…is that right?

“I’ve been trying to make everything clear from the start.”

   “But Ter…you’ve never really noticed it.”

   Suddenly, I remembered what Hill had said…

“How are you, Nong Ter…Nong Ter?” Phii Meili’s voice brought me back to reality, making me jump a little. Phii Meili was equally startled, “You scared me, I’ve been calling you for ages with no response, the call ended a long time ago, and you’re still spacing out.”

“Oh…really?” I lowered the phone from my ear and placed it on the table, “Phii

Meili, what did you say?”

“I asked how it went, did you talk it out with your sister?”

“It went well. We understand each other now…even if I’m still a bit confused, she’s not mad at me anymore.”

“That’s good, siblings should love each other. See? Just one call, and all the lingering issues are gone.”

“Yes…thank you, Phii Meili, for telling me. Christy also said that dad isn’t angry anymore either, so I should be able to go home this break.” I smiled broadly, feeling relieved, thinking of everyone at home.    “I’m happy for you. Did you ask about Doctor Hill?”

“I asked…Christy said she’s over Phii Hill. And she told me to try to notice things around me.”

“And what does that mean?”

“I don’t know.” I replied softly, uncertain. I wasn’t sure what the things around me that Christy was referring to might be, perhaps she meant Phii Hill. Is there something about him that I haven’t noticed?

“Okay, let’s talk about that later. They’re about to start the rehearsal. Let’s get ready to take pictures.”

“Uh…okay.”

 

EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 10: Something In Your Eyes

   I stepped back from the crowd, understanding why Phii Thanmild was crying; because Phii Hill is the one she loves, but maybe it’s been too long for her to keep giving love to someone who has never looked back.

But I can’t really say anything, as I’m probably not much different.

I think I understand that pain well.

But we have a choice…whether to keep wallowing in that pain or not.    I walked out and looked left and right for a place to sit, then I saw senior Ant sitting at the snack and beverage area with a bored expression. So I walked over to her.

“Phii Mot, may I sit with you?” Phii Mot was startled when she heard my voice unexpectedly.

“Oh, sure, go ahead, do you want some cold water? It’s not hot, but people are making a fuss.” Phii Mot said with a sigh, handing me a glass of cold water.

“Thanks.” I took it, not forgetting to thank her, “So, what’s all the fuss about?” Even though I had an idea, I wanted to ask Phii Mot for more details.    “Well…just a bunch of drama, causing trouble for everyone. How many staff have to wait? We were supposed to start the rehearsal at 10:30 when the sun was nice. Look, it’s almost 11 now. We won’t even get to walk before lunch, and by the time we can rehearse, it’ll be afternoon, the sun will be scorching hot, and we’ll all be sweating. Can’t she just cry at home?” Phii Mot complained at length.

Tired and exasperated, I guess she must be really fed up.

   “Sorry, Nong Ter, I’m just a bit upset.” Phii Mot gave me a wry smile.    “It’s okay, what’s the summary of what happened?” I asked back, sipping cold water for refreshment.

“It’s about Thanmild, the medical star, you know her?” I nodded to indicate I knew her, “She likes Doctor Hill, for whatever reason, and now she’s just crying. It’s so confusing. I don’t know the details, but someone said she’s crying because of Doctor Hill. And the doctor, well, he’s disappeared.” Phii Mot let out a big sigh.    “And many of the stars are her friends. So they won’t practice; they’re all busy comforting her. When asked why she’s crying, what’s wrong, she won’t tell. She just says it’s nothing, acting like an abandoned woman in a lakorn, really annoying.” Phii Mot rolled her eyes.

“You don’t like Phii Mild?” I asked out of curiosity. Phii Mot paused a bit with my question.

“Well, you’re direct, aren’t you? Not exactly. I’m just tired of her. I mean, I don’t have any issues with Doctor Hill, but she’s been all over him since the first year.

It’s quite annoying to see.”

“Does Phii Mild like Phii Hill one-sidedly?” Even though I knew the answer from Phii Hill, I wanted to ask Phii Mot again to understand what outsiders thought.

“Definitely. Anyone can see that Doctor Hill isn’t interested in her at all. Maybe she’s the only one who can’t see it, but no one says anything, it might hurt her feelings.”

“And…does Phii Hill not have…a girlfriend?” My heart beat a little faster as I decided to ask this question. Phii Mot looked thoughtful.

“I think not…he seems uninterested in anyone, like he’s emotionally dead. I don’t think he’s dated anyone since he started university.” After a moment, Phii Mot seemed to remember something, “Oh, but he did mention someone he likes in an interview video last year.”

“…”

“Uh…I can’t remember, let me show you.” Phii Mot rummaged through her bag, then pulled out her phone, probably to show me the video she was talking about.    “Oh my god, he’s here, the doctor is here!” Phii Napdao’s shrill voice had both me and Phii Mot turning abruptly to look, and everyone else did the same, looking towards the tall figure walking into the activity area.

Phii Hill…

“Come here, you good boy, come here!” Phii Napdao ran over to drag Phii Hill towards where everyone was gathered. For a moment, I made eye contact with Phii Hill before he looked away.

“Nong Ter, want to go see what’s happening? Maybe there’ll be something interesting.” Phii Mot whispered. I agreed; I was also curious to see what would happen next.

“Calm down, Mae, do you want some smelling salts?” Phii Meili rushed over, panting, before stopping Phii Napdao, who had suddenly dragged Phii Hill into the center of the crowd.

“Leave me alone! Dr. Hill, where have you been? What about this?” Phii Napdao pointed at Phii Thanmild, who was still slumped over crying. At first, there weren’t many people around, but once they saw Phii Napdao dragging Phii Hill in, the curious onlookers gathered as if watching a soap opera, including myself.

“Sniff…Hill, waaah, I am sorry…waaah, I don’t want Hill to be troubled.” Phii Thanmild said between sobs, her words broken due to her heavy crying.

Phii Hill looked at Phii Thanmild with an unreadable expression.

   If this turns into a sweet romantic scene…please call an ambulance for me, because my heart is aching right now.

   Phii Hill crouched down next to Phii Thanmild.

   :

   Sniff…

   I didn’t want to watch anymore…

   Please, don’t wipe Phii Thanmild’s tears like you just did for me…

   “It’s me who should apologize.” said the tall figure in a calmer voice than expected. Phii Thanmild looked up at Phii Hill with hopeful eyes and a faint smile amidst her tear-streaked face.

“Hill…” she called out sweetly to him.

I clenched my mouth shut.

   Just a while ago, you said you liked me, didn’t you…

   If that’s the case…then help me understand that you’re not lying…

   “There’s someone I care about more. I won’t make that one cry because of me anymore.” Phii Hill smiled before standing up, giving me a gentle smile as he turned towards me.

And for the first time, I found myself smiling back.

It was just for a fleeting moment, probably unnoticed by anyone else.

But it made me feel incredibly warm inside.

“…But I am still crying, Hill! Can’t you care about me a little?” Phii Thanmild started to wail loudly, still sobbing, while the women around her tried to hold her back and calm her down. Everyone around started to look around in confusion.

Soon, various criticisms began to rise.

Phii Hill made it as if to leave, but Phii Napdao grabbed his arm first.

“Wait a moment, Doctor, what are we going to do?”

“Mild is tired today. Let her rest. We’ll start practicing in the afternoon.” Phii Hill said. Phii Napdao nodded in understanding, thinking that this was probably the best solution for now, as the stars were already exhausted.

“Okay, let’s do it this way. President of the club, whatever you say goes. Doctor, let Mild rest first, okay? Today, we won’t take it seriously. Let’s go for lunch first, then disperse.” Phii Napdao announced through the loudspeaker. After that, everyone started to disperse for lunch. A few of Phii Thanmild’s friends helped her walk out of the activity area.

Phew, somehow it felt relieving.

   I walked back with Phii Mot to sit at our original spot.

   “Wow, that was intense earlier. At first, I thought it was going to turn into a love scene where Doctor Hill would bend down to wipe Mild’s tears and embrace her. But no, there’s someone else he cares more about, oh my, saying it like that is like a slap in the face.” Phii Mot said, laughing with relish.

Cares more about…Is that so?

   Oh dear…how should I handle my own heart now!

   “Everyone doesn’t have to go out for lunch, it’ll take too long. Our staff has provided boxed lunches. Line up over there, where Phii Mot with a showy face is sitting.” Phii Napdao announced again through the loudspeaker, pointing towards where Phii Mot and I were sitting.

“Hold on, Phii Napdao, what do you mean by ‘sitting there with a showy face’?” Phii Mot shouted back in a teasing tone. Soon, people started lining up, and the staff brought in several bags of boxed meals, arranging them. Since I was sitting nearby, I took the opportunity to take some photos. Even if Phii Meili wasn’t around, she’d probably tell me to take photos if she were here. Even if the photos weren’t usable, it didn’t hurt to take them.

“Do we have fried pork neck?”

“No, we have basil stir-fry, fried rice, and garlic pork, that’s all.”

“Aw, that’s boring, I’m tired of these three dishes. Can’t we order something else?” If I remember correctly, this person should be Phii Sky from the Agriculture Department. She clearly looked bored after seeing today’s lunch offerings.

“Other things are expensive, Sky. You know our club has a tight budget.” So Phii Sky reluctantly picked up a box of food.

“Nong Ter, have you taken the photos yet?” Suddenly, Phii Meili’s voice from behind made me jump slightly.

“I’ve taken the shot, but where did you go?”

“Chasing gossip, that’s what. Today we’ve got the talk of the town, did you manage to take a photo of Dr Hill earlier, Nong Ter?”

“I didn’t take any photos.” I hadn’t even thought about taking pictures at that moment.

“Hmm, keeping it in your heart is enough then.” Phii Meili said half-jokingly. I looked puzzled, and she let out a small laugh, “Ah, if you make that confused face,

I won’t dare to tease you.”

“Meili, perfect timing, could you go get some crates of soda? We’re running low here.” Phii Mot turned to Phii Meili for help since she was busy distributing water. There were staff, stars, and even onlookers from outside the rehearsal who were casually getting in line for some sweet drinks, but it seemed like the seniors didn’t mind, as there was plenty of water to go around anyway.

“Don’t make me do the lifting. I’m a delicate woman, and Nong Ter is here, why don’t you ask him to help?”

“Don’t make the younger one do it, he’s here to take photos, not to carry water.”

“Oh right, I forgot, I’ll go get them then.” Phii Meili raised her hand to pinch my cheek gently before heading to the back to fetch the soda crates. Initially, I thought to help, but it looked like Phii Meili could handle it on her own, maybe even with just one hand.

“Oh, Dr. Hill, are you eating here at the site? You usually eat out.”

The staff member distributing lunch boxes spoke up, making me turn towards the source of the voice. Phii Hill, who was bent over choosing a lunch box, looked up to see who was talking.

   Phii Hill…

   Why does it feel like this time, just hearing his name makes my heart beat unusually fast?

   It’s beating harder than it ever has.

   Just hearing his name makes my heart tremble?

   It’s serious this time, Ter…

   “Uh, I thought the box lunches here today would be especially good.” said Phii Hill, his sharp eyes briefly meeting mine, and my brain automatically commanded me to look away.

I still can’t bring myself to meet his gaze…

“Maybe his sweetheart is around here, huh? Eating with someone special makes everything taste better.” Phii Meili’s voice echoed from a distance, “Hehe, just kidding, Dr., don’t be mad at me, okay?” She then smiled broadly, twisting her body playfully. Phii Hill didn’t say anything, just gave her a polite smile before walking away.

“Meili, do you know who it is?”

“Know who?” Phii Meili looked confused at the person asking.

“Don’t do that, what you teased earlier, do you know who it was about?”

I started to feel anxious. Phii Meili looked at me as if she knew, but if it was Phii Meili, it wouldn’t be hard to guess. After all, Phii Hill had been flirting with me in front of Phii Meili, and earlier he had even dragged me away.

“Um…I don’t know, I just said that.”

“I don’t believe it, tell me, Meili, you’re keeping secrets.”

“Not sure yet, but even if I knew, I wouldn’t say. Doctor Hill might kill me if I did.” Phii Meili stuck her tongue out at the person asking.

“Oh come on, just hint a little, I want to know, everyone wants to know.” Then the staff who had finished distributing the boxed lunches gathered around Phii Meili, forcing me to move back, leaving only Phii Mot still handing out meals.    “Oh, you’re such a gossip, why are you so eager to know? Wait for the doctor to tell you himself.”    “How did you find out?”

“My gay intuition is strong, but if I’m wrong, then I don’t know. It’s even more dramatic than what the doctor said earlier.” I started to sweat. If Phii Meili really knew, please don’t tell anyone, I am begging, T^T

   “Really? Then can you give us a hint?”

“No, no, stop crowding around me, it’s hot, go away. I’m not even sure myself, go ask Doctor Hill again. If he decides to not tell you.” Phii Meili shrugged,

“You’ll find out eventually.”

“How will we know?”

“You guys don’t keep up with the news, do you? Check this out, the Cute Boy page already posted about it.” Hearing what Phii Meili said, I didn’t hesitate; I immediately grabbed my phone to check.

Cute Boy & Girl – MU – Posted a new video 10 minutes ago

   Direct from the star contest event, our second-year medical student, Doctor

Hill, due to some spicy and hot issues from #DoctorGenerous and

#WhoOwnsTheWatch, this time we have a clip that’s like a slap to all the girls in the university, especially…um, one particular person…If you secretly like or are in love with Doctor Hill, admin would like to throw this clip at your face, because even the admin is hurt by this. Who could be this clear, I truly admire the doctor, I really do //wipes tears, #DoctorManlyHill

   It was the clip of Phii Hill talking to Phii Thanmild just now, with a clear shot of Phii Thanmild crying and making a scene. Wow, news spreads fast on social media.

I scrolled through the comments.

: Oh my, boo-hoo, Dr. Mild, Dr. Hill is too harsh. He didn’t have to be this direct.

   Isn’t it better that he’s finally being straightforward?

   Doctor’s eyes, what’s with that look? It’s too serious, it’s like a death sentence.

   The bar will be packed today for sure, a whole school’s worth of heartbreak, including mine. You could have been kinder, Dr., boo-hoo.

   : Doctor, you can’t do this, sob, it’s too hurtful.

   :. Who, who is she? Why is the doctor doing so much for her? Oh, I’m so curious, so jealous.

   : I think the doctor really likes this person a lot. Think about it, he’s never spoken like this to anyone before. Rejecting Phii Mild so directly means he’s really sure about someone else.

   He never spoke up before, why now all of a sudden?

   : One team has lost all its energy, this is team Fern, she’s cute, she even brought water to Phii Hill.

   Team Mild, no more fussing, you lost fair and square, let it go.    : Hey, who’s to blame here? Phii Mild is the pitiful one. As she said, it’s totally unfair. Phii Mild has been taking care of Phii Hill since year one.

   : Taking care or being clingy? Annoying.

   : Mild takes care of Hill? That’s a laugh, Hill doesn’t care about her at all.    He’s already rejected her like that. Said there’s someone he cares about more than Mild, what else is there to be confused about? Mild should love herself.

   Mild has tried so hard, Hill should appreciate that at least.

   : So, the right person wins even before the game begins, huh? Don’t know who it is, but congratulations. Please take good care of our Phii Hill, T^T    I stopped reading the comments when I saw that the page had posted another new message.

Cute Boy & Girl – MU – 1 minute ago

   Let’s stop arguing. I don’t know which team you’re on, but let’s all be team Dr. Hill. We see the person we love, if they love someone else, we should be happy for them (the ultimate heroine). Our Cute Boy page will no longer remain silent on this topic, as the Moon and Star competition doesn’t want outsiders like us to interview. So, we’ll throw money at it, err! Donate a certain amount because the Moon and Star team donates money and old clothes to children in the mountains every year. We’ve talked with the competition organizers, and they said if our page contributes to the donation, they’ll allow an interview with Dr. Hill.

   So, anyone wanting to know the inside scoop on Doctor Hill, donate, five or ten baht each. Don’t give too much, or there might be drama about us exploiting our followers. Admin isn’t using the money to buy booze, cosmetics, or to treat anyone; it’s for donations. So, consider it making merit, you’ll earn merit and get the scoop.

   P.S. The Moon and Star contest committee also asked to promote the commemorative postcards from the event, which help support children against the cold this year, are still available. Please support by buying one, the photos will be hot for sure (even if she says they haven’t been taken yet, haha).    Wow, that’s awesome, the Cute Boy page is accepting donations to interview Phii Hill. They’ve gone all out, supposedly for the mountain children. That’s a pretty good idea.

But it’s not so great for Phii Hill to be interviewed, huh.

“Phii Meili, what are these commemorative postcards from the Moon and Star contest?” I asked Phii Meili.

“Oh, every year we take pictures of the stars and moons, but it’s the second year, because this is when we’re supposed to sell them. First year faculties don’t have their stars and moons yet, so we’ll take photos of the second years.” Phii Meili explained, “We have a tradition of donating to help children in the mountains facing cold weather and providing educational scholarships every year. So, we make postcards of them to sell, and all the profits go to donations.”

“…”

“It’s an order from the university.”

“I see.” I nodded in understanding, “So, they haven’t taken the photos yet, like the page mentioned?”

“I was hoping Nong Ter could help with that.” Phii Meili said with a wry smile. “The old photographer isn’t good, and it’s hard to find a new one, so I thought I’d suggest Nong Ter to do it, since you take beautiful photos.”    “No…I don’t think I can handle official photography like that.”

“Come on, let’s propose it first.”

“Uh, I doubt anyone would agree to that.” Really, I think it’s beyond me, these are postcards for the contest, if they’re not good, it’s all over.

   “Someone will.” Phii Meili whispered beside me, “If Doctor Hill agrees, no one would dare to object.”

“…Huh? Why would Phii Hill need to agree?” What is Phii Meili talking about?    “Oops. Nothing, I didn’t see or hear anything, hehe.” Then Phii Meili played off like she was joking, rolling her eyes elsewhere, which made me even more sure that she knew something.

I have a bad feeling about this somehow.

   Sigh…If it were North, Foam, or Phoon, I’d threaten to kill them to keep them quiet, but it’s Phii Meili, T^T

   “Finally done, I’m going to take a break now. Meili, please watch the stuff, and don’t let Nong Ter disappear again.” said Phii Mot before twisting her body to relieve the stiffness from standing and distributing water for so long. I only now noticed that the other staff members had gone to sit together and eat at the back. Only me, Phii Meili, and Phii Mot were left here.

“Okay, go ahead, Mot.” Phii Meili nodded in agreement, and Phii Mot walked off to join the other staff.

“Oh, someone’s partner is eating over there.” Phii Meili said in a cheerful tone, pointing towards Phii Hill who was eating with a group of second-year moon friends, causing me to glance over and give a slightly reproachful look.

“Phii Meili, come on, what partner?” I frowned at her.

“Oh my, someone’s embarrassed…Dr. Hill, there’s someone here blushing a lot.”    Even though Phii Meili wasn’t loud enough for others to hear, it still made me feel embarrassed. What’s this about? Why tease me? T^T, stop it already, boo-hoo.    “Your face and ears are all red, is it from the sun? But it’s not that hot. Wow, he looks handsome from afar, doesn’t he?” Phii Meili continued to point at Phii Hill without stopping.

“What’s with you, Phii Meili?” I pretended not to know what she was talking about.

“Even when he’s just sitting with the moon group, he still stands out so much, it really grates on my heart.” Phii Meili twisted with feigned embarrassment, “Come on, let’s go take some photos.” and then she grabbed my wrist, pretending to drag me away. Why does everyone want to drag me around today?

“No…I don’t want to.” I resisted her pull, “They’re eating, we’d bother them.”    “Bother what? They’re eating, but he’s been sneaking glances over here several times, afraid someone might kidnap you or what?” she said with a hint of irritation.

“He’s…looking here?”

Does that mean Phii Hill was sneaking looks at me? Hey, before I could even think, Phii Meili had already dragged me over to the table where the moon group was eating.

I protested to Phii Meili because I wasn’t ready to face him right now. I really wasn’t. At least give me some time to prepare. Not just drag me like this. But before I knew it, I was pulled to the moon group’s table by someone stronger than me, and the guys were talking loudly as guys do.

“Hey guys, can we take some pictures?” Phii Meili asked, and everyone turned to look at us.

Including Phii Hill.

Phii Hill looked up at me.

Just like that…my heart started feeling uneasy again.

“Take photos while we’re eating?” one of the seniors said while still chewing.    “How about we do some behind-the-scenes shots? I’m not going to direct you, too lazy to talk much. I’ll introduce you all before we start practicing. Just act natural, eat like there’s no camera here.” Everyone nodded in understanding and then turned back to eating and chatting casually.    “Are you taking photos today, junior? That’s so cute.”

“What’s with you, Jijo? Nong Ter, this is Jijo, the moon from the Law Department. You are not allowed to flirt with him, Jijo, this one is off-limits, someone’s already claimed him. Meili here will defend the junior, like an ant guarding its hill.”

“Wow, what’s all this about?”

“Just being cautious, Jijo isn’t trustworthy.”

“Is your name Nong Ter?”

I simply nodded without responding verbally.

“Do you have a girlfriend?”

“Hey Jijo, I said no flirting.” Phii Meili retorted, hands on her hips.

“I’m not flirting, just asking…what do you say?”

“Uh…” I looked around, unsure what to say, “Right now…no.”

I decided to answer truthfully…because I really don’t have a girlfriend. If I had said yes, they would have asked who it was.

“See…if you don’t have a girlfriend, then I can flirt, right?” Jijo said halfjokingly.

“You can’t.” Phii Meili argued.

“But he doesn’t have a girlfriend, does he?”

“I told you, someone has already claimed him.”

“But that doesn’t mean they’re dating, right? So technically, no one has the right to block others.” Jijo gave me a mischievous smile. All I could do was give a dry smile back, “In cases like this, the freshman should decide.”    Jijo’s words made Phii Meili let out a big sigh.

“So, are you going to flirt with the junior?” Phii Meili raised her eyebrow, pointing at me.

“Well…I don’t know. I just think he’s cute, that’s all.” Jijo said as he took out his phone, “We could exchange Line IDs, get to know each other better.” and he handed his phone to me.

I wasn’t sure what to do…

   I remembered the time when my senior got mad because I exchanged Line IDs with Phii Junior…

   I turned to look at Phii Hill, sitting not far from Phii Jijo, his face impassive, but his eyes betrayed his anger which he was barely containing…

   

   EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 9: Question & Answer

   The gentle tug on my wrist by someone taller made me follow along helplessly. I tried to shake my hand free, but it was futile. Phii Hill didn’t say anything after we left that area, with the surrounding noise from the crowd, I hoped no one noticed us. It would be bad if anyone saw, because Phii Hill was clearly holding my hand.

Huhhhhh…

The silent cry in Ter’s heart that no one heard…

The noise of the crowd quieted down after Phii Napdao announced for all the stars and moons to return to their lines, but it seemed that voice had no effect on the person in front of me.

Phii Hill kept leading me away from the activity area.

Ohhh, why does he have such sticky hands? I can’t even get free!

“Where are we going?” I said, still trying to free my hand, but Phii Hill gripped it tighter.

The other person didn’t respond until we reached the side of the activity area, near the equipment storage rooms, not exactly a hidden spot, but probably because it was the semester break, there weren’t many people around.

Phii Hill stopped walking but didn’t let go of my hand. I pulled back once more. “Let go.” I said with a slight tone of annoyance, to be dragged off like this without any explanation.

“I won’t.” Phii Hill turned to look at me. The look in his eyes made me pause. I couldn’t have seen it wrong, could I? In a blink, I saw a hint of vulnerability in those eyes, before they returned to their usual warmth.

“…” I couldn’t say anything.

Phii Hill raised his other hand and gently touched my cheek.

Why does it feel like…

Something is about to overflow.

“I can’t let someone who’s crying go.” a warm hand moved up to gently wipe away the tears that were welling up.

Am I…crying?

“I’m not crying!” I pushed his hand away and wiped my tears roughly.

“Don’t rub your eyes so hard.” Phii Hill held my other hand.

“Let go…hic.” I hated that look full of concern, and suddenly, tears I didn’t know where they came from started flowing. I didn’t even know why I was crying…I just knew I started sobbing until I could barely breathe.

It felt like all my endurance had crumbled down.

“Ugh…sob.” I let everything I had been holding back flow out along with my tears. I didn’t know anymore. hic…

Phii Hill released both my hands before pulling me into a hug.

“Let go…let go!” I protested while sobbing, pounding on his strong chest with all my might. I knew it must have hurt him, but he still didn’t loosen his embrace; instead, he hugged me tighter.

“Ugh…sob, let go.” I pulled and tugged at the bright white student shirt, “I hate you!…hic. I hate you! Do you hear me!” I didn’t even know what I was saying anymore. I didn’t want to see myself like this right now.

“Yes…I know.” The gentle voice came out softly, like water soothing the fire that was spreading through my heart, his hand stroking to comfort, “Breathe deeply, okay?” Phii Hill leaned down to whisper in my ear, using his thumb to gently wipe away my tears again.

I continued to sob in his embrace for a while. If it weren’t for Phii Hill holding me up, I would have collapsed to the ground. How could I cry so much in front of him?

   I’ve always cried alone…

   I tried to take deep breaths to calm my heart and pull my mind back together.

   “Your eyes are all red now.” Phii Hill smiled at me tenderly and loosened his hug. I slowly stepped back, “Are you okay now?”

“I don’t know.” I grumbled to hide my embarrassment.

“Okay, then I think it’s time we had a talk.”

“Talk about what?”

“About what made you cry.”

“I didn’t cry.” I looked down, feeling utterly embarrassed.

“But my shirt is completely soaked, and it’s all crumpled too.” Phii Hill pointed at himself, showing his student shirt that was neat this morning but now stained with tears and crumpled from being tugged at.

“I…I’m sorry.” I apologized, feeling guilty.

“It’s okay.” Phii Hill walked over to sit on a nearby marble chair. “Come sit here.”

I didn’t say anything before walking over to sit beside him, feeling awkward.

After all, I had just sobbed all over him; it would be crazy to run away now.

“Phii …I don’t know where to start.” Phii Hill looked serious, but his eyes betrayed his inner turmoil.

Phii Hill was…scared.

“I want to start anew…but sometimes, we can’t avoid the past.”

“Because it’s a wound too deep.” His sad eyes made me want to cry again.    I had never seen him like this before…

My hands started sweating again, and I clenched my lips to suppress a slight tremble. I didn’t dare meet his sorrowful gaze; it would make my eyes burn with tears.

Phii Hill sighed softly as if preparing to say something that was weighing heavily on his mind. I waited to hear those words, though my own heart was trembling just as much…

   I was afraid too…

   I was scared that what he would say would change everything, whether what I had always understood was right or wrong, the truth would change something between us.

   Or maybe there are things I shouldn’t know. If it would cause more pain than I’ve ever felt. Should I stay and listen? It’s not that I don’t want to know anything. I do want to know and hear it from him.

   And how much can I believe in that truth…?

   “Uh…actually, it all started five years ago.” His deep, soft voice finally spoke, while I was lost in my conflicted thoughts.

“Uh…wait.”

I didn’t know if I could handle everything he was about to tell…

“Yes?”

“I…can I ask something first?”

“Yes?”

“Will the story I tell be okay for me?”

“Um…it should be okay.”

“Will you tell me everything?”

“Of course…or do you not want to hear it?”

“Uh…I don’t know, I think maybe not right now.” I said hesitantly. Part of me wanted to know, but my mind was flashing warning signals.

“Not right now is fine. I’ll tell you later.” Phii Hill smiled at me indulgently, then reached out to gently pat my head.    “Huh…what?”

“It’s up to you, Ter. I can do either way, I just want you to feel comfortable.” Phii Hill withdrew the hand that was patting my head, “But we should probably talk a little now. It wouldn’t be good to leave things like this.”

“Uh…yeah, but what are we going to talk about?”

“If you aren’t ready to hear everything, then do you have anything you want to ask me?” Phii Hill seemed to know I had many questions and was giving me the chance to ask them. And it was true. I had plenty of things I wanted to ask.    “Then…don’t tell me everything, just enough for me to understand, but not the whole thing.” I emphasized, somewhat afraid of hearing something that might upset me.

“Ha ha.” Phii Hill chuckled lightly at my words, then lifted my chin with his hand and looked at me affectionately, “How should we do this, just enough to understand but not everything?”

“Well…just half then, give me the part that’s okay.”

“And the other half?”

“…” I furrowed my brows, pondering for a moment, “I’ll decide when I want to know that.” I decided to leave it for the future.

“That’s fine. I’ll answer all of your questions anyway.” His handsome face was adorned with a gentle smile, along with the tender look I often saw, sigh…it really wasn’t good for me.

“And what percentage can I trust?”

“A hundred percent.”

“Really? And how will I know?”

“I’ll prove it to you myself.” and that firm tone made me stop doubting Phii Hill. Whether to trust him or not, I’d decide later. For now, I’ll ask questions…and I need to choose my questions carefully.

“So, the first question…Phii Thanmild…” I decided to mention the name of the person currently bothering me. I wanted Phii Hill to tell me what’s really going on between him and Phii Thanmild, because she’s been very clear.

“Why?” Phii Hill asked with a puzzled look, probably understanding but pretending not to know, hmph.

“Well…what’s the deal?”

“She’s an ex-girlfriend of a friend.”

“Aren’t you friends?”

“No.” Phii Hill shook his head gently. “We’re not friends.”

“Really? And what do you think of her?”

“She is annoying.” Phii Hill looked at me with emotionless eyes. Annoying, huh…that’s harsh. If she heard that, she’d be heartbroken. You don’t care at all, do you? “But I have to respect her because she’s a woman.”

Even though Phii Thanmild likes Phii Hill so much, huh…well, let’s change the question then.

   “What about Christmas?” I decided to ask about my sister, since I knew Phii Hill and Chris used to like each other.

“She’s my sister-in-law.”

“Oh…I thought you liked each other.”

“We’re senior and junior.” Phii Hill smiled. “Because you didn’t let me tell you everything, I won’t continue with this topic.”

Oh…karma. Now I’m really curious, but then again, it directly involves me.

   So…should I ask about myself?

   “Me then…”

“Hmm? Why?” Phii Hill flashed a broad smile, his eyes sparkling.

“Well, me…” I whispered, oh boy. I’m not brave enough to ask, sigh.

“The main point of this story is you, do you want me to tell you?” the tall figure said in a soft, slightly cunning tone.

“Uh…no, no, no, let’s not go there. Change the topic, please.” I waved my hands dismissively, trying to forget what I just said. Why did I ask such a direct question?

It’s like asking if he likes me or something…

And what if the answer wasn’t good, what would you do, Ter? T^T

“But I can tell you parts of it, just to say we’ve talked about it.”

“Ah, uh…really? What about some parts?” I started to get interested in what my brother was saying he wanted to talk about, at least if it could clarify my current doubts.

“For example…about when I asked to pursue you, Ter.”

“!!!” I gasped deeply when I heard the word ‘pursue’, yeah, that’s right. I should ask about this.

“…” I realized I really should ask about this so I wouldn’t have to guess on my own anymore, “So…what’s the deal with that?”

“Hmm…” Phii Hill drew out his voice, making a teasingly thoughtful gesture,

“Just as I said, it’s quite clear.”

“Clear how…go on, explain, why would you pursue me?”

“Well, if we’re talking about pursuing someone, there’s only one reason, isn’t there?” Phii Hill tilted his head in curiosity, “The reason is ‘liking someone’, right?”    So how is it, when did it start, why, and why bring it up now?

   “Are you really going to pursue me?” I was still puzzled.

“Absolutely.” The tall figure gave a sincere smile.

“The reason is…that…” right? I hesitated to say the word. It’s embarrassing, you know. Who would dare to ask that, huh? My heart wasn’t feeling any better, it started beating strongly again since we sat down to talk.

“Oh…if you mean ‘liking you’…”

“Yes.”

“Hey, why say it so casually like that!!”

“…Like what! Stop, stop, stop saying it, censor that word, beep.” I raised both hands making an ‘X’ sign, mimicking a censor sound, Phii Hill chuckled a bit at my reaction.

What’s so funny!!

Thump Thump

Thump Thump

Gasp!!! Phii Hill said he likes me, Phii Hill said he likes me.

Woah!!!

“Ha ha ha, alright. I won’t say it anymore.” Phii Hill laughed softly before reaching to pat my head again, but this time I dodged in time.

“Absolutely not.” I frowned slightly, “Liar.”

“I’m not lying.”

“Liar.”

“I’m telling the truth.”

“Just suddenly saying this, who would believe it? Nothing seemed off before.” I started to protest, feeling as though warm tears were beginning to well up around my eyes again.

“I’ve been trying to make everything clear from the start.”

“…”

“But you…never noticed it.”

“…”

Danger

Detected an abnormally fast heart rate

…Your heart is at risk of sudden failure!!

“Ter…Ter.” Phii Hill’s soft voice brought me back to reality. Just now, it felt like I short-circuited, like an appliance drenched in water, sigh.

“Since…when?” I managed to squeeze out the words from my throat to ask. Right now, my brain could only process this one question.

“You’re back with me. You were completely still just now; I thought I might have to perform CPR.” Phii Hill referred to himself as “doctor” and gave me a sweet, yet cunning smile.

“Funny, CPR for what, how did you even study medicine? Are you ready to perform CPR on anyone at any moment?” Once I had almost fully regained my senses, I retorted.

“Five years.”

“Huh?”

“The answer to your previous question…it’s been five years up…to now.” The tall figure said before pushing himself up from the chair. Wait, what, five years!?

I paused for a moment to let my brain process and calculate the time again.    “Wait, what, five years…we’ve known each other for that long?” I turned to ask Phii Hill, who was now walking around the marble table.

“Well…not exactly, I guess.” The other person extended his hand towards me, indicating for me to take it and stand up.

“…Five years. I was just starting high school then. We met when I was in upper high school, didn’t we?” I objected, puzzled, while getting up from the chair on my own without taking Phii Hill’s hand.

“Yes.” Phii Hill grabbed my hand, “It’s a long story, let’s save it for another time.”

“But…but I want to know. What’s the real deal?” I said, shaking off his hand.

“Well, you said you didn’t want to know all of it.” Phii Hill said, “Just this should be enough for now, at least now you know that I really intend to pursue you.” The tall man still wouldn’t let go of my hand as usual. I kept frowning because the word ‘pursue’ was still embarrassing me.

Hmph, I want to know, but part of me is scared, T^T

“Let’s go, otherwise, others will be inconvenienced too.”

He’s right…he’s got to go practice his catwalk. And I’ve got to go take photos, oh, I almost forgot.

“But you don’t have to hold my hand.” I grumbled without looking at him.

“It’s a punishment.” The tall figure said, “For giving your LINE to Junior.”

“What…what? He just invited me to take photos.”

“I’ll take photos with you myself. Don’t worry about them.” Before he gently pulled my wrist to make me follow, instead of clearing things up with the questions I asked, it just made me more confused!

Five years, what’s that about, oh my, I can’t figure it out.

   I thought he was going to hold my hand back to the activity area, but Phii Hill led me to the parking lot instead.

“Ter, you go back first. Thanks for walking with me.” And Phii Hill gave me his usual sweet smile. It wasn’t like he forced me to hold hands, right?    “Where are you going?”

“Back to the condo to change clothes.” Phii Hill answered, flicking the key fob to unlock his fancy car while showing me his shirt, “Hmm…it does need changing, with all the wrinkles and tear stains from you. Uh…it’s really embarrassing to see.”

“…”

“But just change, okay? I won’t wash it.”

“…Are you crazy!! You’re filthy.” I couldn’t help but say, you dirty person, with it being that stained and you say you won’t wash it, the car teased me.

“Well, it was you who did it.”

“Wash it…it’s dirty.”

“Haha, just kidding. Then, see you at the activity area, okay?” Phii Hill opened the car door and got in, “Or you can go back to the condo with me if you want.” He lowered the window just as quickly.

“No thanks, I’ll go by myself.” I stuck out my tongue at him before turning back to head towards the activity area. I hadn’t walked far when I heard the sound of the luxurious European car moving away.

I walked slowly down the path, my mind filled with a lot to think about…Phii Hill has been into me for five years already? How could that be…I didn’t even know him for those five years. I hadn’t even heard of him, not until I was in grade 9. I knew Phii Hill casually, but he probably didn’t know me, because at my old school, the junior and senior high sections were separated. I heard rumors about a new transfer in grade 10, very handsome, in the “King’s class”, academically excellent, and a standout in sports. Plus, his family was well-off, so he was pretty much perfect.

   That senior was named Phii Hill. Honestly, I didn’t care much. I didn’t know him, but I often saw Phii Hill around after school before heading home. He would often wait by the school gate, waiting for who knows who, some said he waited for his girlfriend every day, oh, how romantic, right?

   Then there was news that he was flirting with Phii Thanmild, but not long after, Phii Thanmild started dating Phii Hill’s friend instead. It seems like Phii Thanmild actually knew Phii Hill before I did.

   By the time I reached grade 10 and moved to the senior high section, I saw more of him. Sometimes at the sports center practicing basketball, sometimes football. How did I know? Well, his fans would scream so loudly that even the teachers had to go down to shoo them away because the noise was disturbing other classes.

   “Hey! Khun Ratchakit, can you stop practicing football during class time? I can’t teach with all this noise. Same goes for you a lot, are you here to study or what!?”

   That was from my Thai language teacher, Khun Chomkwarn, who hadn’t been teaching my class for ten minutes before the noise from the field next door drowned out her voice. She had lost her patience after several instances.    Everyone in my class was now crowding the corridor to see what our teacher would complain about this time. The middle-aged woman in her civil servant attire stood with her hands on her hips, clearly irritated. Phii Hill, in his gym kit, looking neat despite having played football under the sun, his shirt partly out of his shorts and his hair slightly disheveled.

   But looking like that probably didn’t hurt his popularity with the girls either.    “Oh, teacher, we’re supposed to be in P.E. class, how can we stop playing?” It wasn’t Phii Hill, but another friend standing nearby who chimed in.

   “Then keep it down.”

   “You have to tell Ratchakit’s fan club, teacher. We’ve already warned them once before, but they won’t listen.”

   “They don’t even listen when I have been warning them for a month. Those kids, brats, I guess I’ll have to call the disciplinary teacher for this.” Khun Chomkwarn seemed even more annoyed now.

   “What classroom do you teach, Teacher?”

   “Grade 4/7.”

   “Then I’ll handle it myself, I’m sorry.” Phii Hill spoke with a submissive tone, bowed to the teacher, and walked out.

   “Hey, how are you going to handle it, Hill? Last time you talked and got

nowhere.” The senior shouted after Phii Hill. Teacher Chomkwarn smiled slightly with satisfaction before returning to the classroom, making us all scramble back inside just in time.

   I didn’t know what Phii Hill meant by ‘handling it,’ but after that, on the same day and time, my Thai language class in the afternoon had no more loud noises from the field, nor any signs of Phii Hill.

   Suddenly, I found myself reminiscing about the past, not realizing when I had wandered to the activity area. Everyone seemed busier than when I had left. I walked in slowly, looking for Phii Meili.

“Nong Ter, squeal, the freshman is here, Napdao, the freshman is here!” Phii Meili’s eyes sparkled when she saw me, then she grabbed my arm and pulled me into the chaos.

What’s happening here?

Meili dragged me to a tent where the sound equipment was set up. I saw Phii Napdao sitting there holding her head. Upon hearing Phii Meili’s call, she quickly stood up and approached me.

“Nong Ter, is that you, Nong Ter?” Phii Napdao shook my hand, …uh. I was completely confused.

“Uh…what’s the matter?”

“Is this the kid that went with Doctor Hill?” Phii Napdao turned to ask Phii Meili.

“Yes, ma’am.”

Oh…I’m getting a bad feeling about this.

“And why did you come back alone? Where did Doctor Hill go?”

“Uh, Phii Hill said he was just going back to the condo for a bit.” I said truthfully.

“Oh, come on, he didn’t even tell us, and he’s supposed to lead the parade. I wanted to ask where he went.” Phii Napdao paused, “But look, it’s a big problem.” PhiiNapdao pointed to where several women were gathered, and told me to go look.

“Exactly, sigh, how’s the monkey doing, is it getting better?” Phii Napdao led me through the crowd to ask someone who was sitting slumped on the ground, surrounded by people.    Phii Thanmild was crying…

“Sniff…sniff, waaaah.” Phii Thanmild burst into tears and hugged another female senior who was sitting next to her, trying to comfort her. Everyone looked at her with concern.

“What’s wrong?” I whispered to Phii Meili who was standing behind.    “It’s Mild. After Dr. Hill and Nong Ter left, she started crying a lot, so we couldn’t start the rehearsal. They asked what was wrong, and she said nothing, which just made everyone worry even more.”    Oh…that’s not good…

   “It’s about Dr. Hill, who else…He’s disappeared, not knowing where he went. Look, Mild has cried so much her eyes are all red.” The senior standing nearby said to Phii Meili, “He’s so heartless, doesn’t he know how much Mild loves him?”    What’s happening?

   

   EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 8: Not Fair

   “Turn your side a bit more, you look fantastic.” Phii Meili’s voice rang out as I tried to keep my composure, snapping photos of Phii Hill like there was no tomorrow. I felt like some were bound to be out of focus, but if I just kept shooting, one had to be good, right?

“You’re smiling so tenderly, looking at the camera like you’re looking at your lover, your inner vibe is strong!”    I feel like screaming!

“Oh, what’s wrong with you, Nong Ter? Not going to continue shooting?” I accidentally lowered the camera and hung my head in frustration, letting out a sigh, trying to control my breathing to calm my racing heart. I really can’t take it anymore, can I have ten minutes to catch my breath?

“Is something wrong?” Phii Hill asked, his voice tinged with slight concern, before approaching closer.

“No…I’m fine.” I replied, looking somewhat disheveled.

“With the camera held like that, the photos will be blurred.” Phii Hill said with a slight smile, “Are your arms tired? Do you want a tripod?” That’s exactly what I need, a tripod, urgently!

“That would be nice.” I said softly.

“I’ll go ask for one. Do you want to continue shooting?”

Oh, how I want to say I’m done shooting! But how can I do that, T^T    “Come on, Doctor Hill, can we try this pose? Look at your partner with love in your eyes.”

“Sure, if it’s with the cameraman.” Phii Hill said, smiling slightly.    Hey!! What are you saying, Phii Hill?!!!

“Doctor Hill, you can flirt too? That’s new.” Phii Meili teased with a laugh.

“I don’t do it often.” He said, smiling and looking at me. Oh my gosh, my knees are going weak, T^T, stop looking at me like that right now.

“All second-year medical students.” a high-pitched voice called from the doorway, causing everyone to turn and look, “Get ready, in fifteen minutes, we’re heading to the stage for the rehearsal.” This must be Phii Napdao, the one who’s supposed to teach how to walk the runway, a rather fierce-looking trans woman with a plump figure, but her voice was like music to my ears. At least I don’t have to face him like this; it might be better to shoot during the rehearsal walk.    “The star counter has arrived, and you haven’t had enough of shooting Doctor Hill?” Phii Meili said, sounding bored, “We can continue shooting there, let him get ready first.”

“Okay, see you later.” Phii Hill said, giving me a gentle smile.

“I’ll take lots of photos, make sure to look at the camera.”

“I will, I won’t take my eyes off it.” Phii Hill said, looking at me again. How many times do I have to say not to look at me like that! Oh my. I quickly turned away without thinking as Phii Hill walked off to join the other medical students.

Well, it’s for the best. If he kept saying those crazy things, I’d have to call for an ambulance to stand by at the door! Sigh…Does anyone have some smelling salts?

TT

I let out a slow sigh before scanning the room, noticing Phii Hill walking over to chat with someone from another faculty. It was clear that Phii Hill had a natural charm and was very attractive without needing any enhancements, it was just his nature. How can someone be that perfect, seriously…

“Nong Ter, Nong Ter.” I heard Phii Meili calling and quickly turned around.    “Uh…yes?”

“What are you daydreaming about? I’ve been calling you for ages.” Phii Meili looked at me puzzled, then moved to stand beside me, looking in the direction I had been staring. “Looking at the moon from another faculty? Oh, do you have a special interest in someone?”    “N…No, I was just looking.”

“Oh, is it Dr. Hill then? He was flirting with us earlier. It wasn’t light, I got embarrassed on your behalf.” Phii Meili said, squirming with mock embarrassment. Uh…

“N…No, I was just looking.”

“Really? I felt a vibe, or perhaps…” Phii Meili paused, “Is it the person in the photo Dr. Hill posted?” she teased, probably just joking, but it made my heart skip a beat. Why is it so easy to guess? It’s because he went and said something out loud!

“No, it wouldn’t be me.” I tried to keep my voice normal, and thankfully, Phii Meili didn’t seem to read much into it, just laughing it off. Maybe she was just teasing and didn’t mean anything by it.

“Okay, I was just kidding. Don’t look so serious. I’ve just never seen Dr. Hill talk like that to anyone casually. Are you two close?”

“We were at the same old school together, so we know each other a bit.”

“Oh, because you’re his junior, I see. Okay, let’s go stand by backstage.”

“Which stage?”

Thank goodness we changed the topic. T^T

“The activity stage, the real stage, isn’t finished yet, right?” Then Phii Meili took my hand and led me there. I followed easily.

When we got to the back of the stage, I saw that the moon and star contest team was setting up. This stage wasn’t grand; it was more of a setup with small partitions, snacks, sweet drinks, and boxed meals prepared, with everyone busy arranging things.

“Hey Meili, is this the junior from the society here to take photos?” A senior woman approached to greet Phii Meili and me.

“Yes, that’s right, Nong Easter here, he takes amazing photos.”

“Hello.” I greeted with a wai.

“Hello, I’m Ant.” said Phii Ant, greeting me with a wai.

“Ann, take him to get something to eat, I’ll go check the stage.” Phii Meili handed me over to Phii Mot and walked away. Why do I feel like I’m being passed around like this? From Phii Pim to Phii Meili, and now to Phh Ann.

“Sure, come on.” Phii Mot led me to where the snacks and sweet drinks were set up. “Help yourself, are you hungry?”

“Not yet.” I smiled back, picked up a glass of sweet drink and a bag of bread, not forgetting to thank Phii Mot before sitting down to eat. At least there are snacks.

“It’s not too hot today, the walk rehearsal should be more comfortable.” Phii Mot sat down beside me, also grabbing some snacks. “By the way, Nong Ter, what department are you in?”

“Veterinary Medicine.” I answered, “What about you?”

“I’m in Nursing.” she replied, same as Phii Fondao. “Second-year Vet stars and moons aren’t too shabby either. Are you interested in the moon competition?”

“No, I don’t think I could handle it.” I smiled sheepishly.

“Shy, huh? But I think you could do it, you should give it a try, it’s a good experience.” Phii Mot said half-jokingly. “Oh, here they come, the stars and moons. Wow, Phii Napdao is as strict as ever, they’re all walking in formation like this.”

“Is Phii Napdao strict?” I asked, having heard people talk about her.    “She’s not overly harsh, just strict. But if it weren’t for Phii Napdao training them, our university’s stars and moons wouldn’t be this impressive.” I nodded in understanding, watching the procession of stars and moons from a distance. It looked like they were walking in pairs, each from their respective departments, with the stars holding arms with the moons.

Holding arms…?

Phii Hill was leading the procession with Phii Thanmild on his arm, walking with such elegance. I could hear Phii Napdao’s voice periodically correcting those who weren’t walking well.

There are people shipping me with Hill, saying ‘stars must pair with moons’, whatever that means.

   Suddenly, Phii Thanmild’s voice echoed in my mind, but the sight in front of me really made that phrase ‘they look good together’ come to life, as people often say.

Back in high school, there were many who shipped them too, but back then, Phii Thanmild was dating a friend of Phii Hill.

Once they reached near the back of the stage, they stopped. Phii Napdao explained that they would play music, and everyone should walk up in the order they were lined up now, with marked spots for each. Phii Napdao would watch each one to see if they were okay. If not, they’d have to walk again.

I secretly thought Phii Hill might be looking at me, but no, he was looking at Phii Napdao and intently listening to what she was saying. However, Phii Thanmild, who was standing next to her, kept her eyes fixed on me without looking away. I looked back at her with confusion before turning my gaze elsewhere. I couldn’t help but notice the disdain in her eyes and the slight smirk on her lips.

   Why is she looking at me like that?

   I bit my lip to keep my thoughts from wandering. I really didn’t like this feeling; it was something I experienced almost every time I got close to Phii Thanmild. It felt like there was something scary hidden behind her smile.

   Does she hate me? …I can’t remember doing anything to upset Phii Thanmild, but if it’s about Phii Hill, I’ve never interfered between the two. If they are in love, what could I possibly do about it?

   Whatever happens, it’s up to Phii Hill, isn’t it? It’s not up to me at all.    It seemed like Phii Napdao was telling everyone to take a break because there was a minor issue with the speaker system playing the music. Conversations were loud, and many staff started distributing snacks and sweet drinks. What was I supposed to do now? Where did Phii Meili go? Who should I take photos of next?    “Nong Ter, come on, I brought you a tripod; someone will set it up at the front of the stage. Let’s continue taking behind-the-scenes shots.” Phii Meili pulled my arm before I could finish my snack. Couldn’t she wait until I was done eating?

Nonetheless, I had to follow Phii Meili.

We walked around to the back. From there, I couldn’t see Phii Hill or Phii Thanmild anymore. Who knows how close they might get, but it didn’t concern me anyway.

“Junior, come quickly, Meili needs you to take photos of Junior.” Phii Meili dragged me over to someone she called Junior, who was about as tall as Phii Hill, with very fair skin, likely of mixed heritage because his eyes formed a single line when he smiled. I guess you’d call him more cute than handsome.

“Taking photos?”

“Yes, behind-the-scenes of the rehearsal. This is Nong Ter, he’s the photographer for today.” Phii Meili introduced me. I smiled and slightly bowed my head.

“Hello, I’m Junior.” He greeted me kindly.

“Hello, I apologize for the inconvenience.” I said.

“No problem at all, did Meili find the photographer herself?”

“Not really, the society sent him. Why do you ask?”

“No reason.” Junior said, then turned his gaze back to me, “You’re cute.”    Huh…what?

“Th…Thank you.” I bowed my head slightly in embarrassment; it was the first time another guy complimented me. I don’t receive compliments often, so when I do, I feel strangely shy.

“Such a child, boring!” Phii Meili rolled her eyes at Phii Junior, who just chuckled quietly. “Just now, Doctor Hill complimented him too. Nong Ter isn’t ordinary, just like I said.”

Wait, what does that mean, Phii Meili?!

“Hill did?” Phii Junior asked with a puzzled look.

“Yeah, just now he was flirting with him. I’m genuinely jealous.”    I forced a dry smile.

“Oh, really? Then shall we take photos?” said Phii Nea, moving slightly away to pose for the camera. I immediately lifted my camera to start shooting because the light was just right now. Phii Meili gave Phii Nea some tips on how to pose, and it took a little while before we finished the shoot.

“Is it okay?”

“It’s good, thanks, we’ll continue shooting during the rehearsal walk.” Phii Meili said before grabbing my hand to move on, but Phii Near’s voice stopped us first.

“Hey, wait a moment, Nong Ter.” Phii Nea called me over, moving closer. I tilted my head in confusion, wondering what was up. “Can I have your LINE?”    “Umm…sure? Exchange LINE? Why?” I asked, baffled, just like Phii Meili who now looked extremely surprised.

“Just in case we want to hang out and take photos together. I saw you take good shots.”

Oh, for taking photos, that’s great. I was just thinking about finding someone to practice shooting with.

“Oh, sure, that would be great. I was actually looking for someone to model for me.” I replied eagerly, quickly pulling out my phone from my pocket to show my Line ID. Phii Near then added me.

Suddenly, I felt someone’s arm wrap around my shoulder, pulling me close.

Since I was unprepared, I couldn’t help but stumble in that direction.

“What are you guys doing?”

“Uh…Phii Hill!!” I exclaimed his name in surprise. Why did he suddenly come over and put his arm around me? When did he even get here? Let go, will you?!    “Oh, how did Doctor Hill get here? Weren’t you supposed to be at the front of the line?” Phii Meili questioned.

Oh my, this is too much, can Phii Meili please help me pry his arm off? I caught a whiff of a familiar, faint scent, unmistakably Phii Hill’s fragrance. Oh, we’re too close, T^T.

“Let’s go for a walk.” The deep, soft voice next to me said. When I sneakily looked up, I saw that handsome face staring intensely at Phii Junior.

“What are you looking at?” Junior asked in a playful tone, but it seemed like Phii Hill wasn’t in the mood for games, his expression clearly saying ‘I’m not amused’. “Looking at the cat burglar.”

Cat burglar? Does he mean Junior? What does that mean?

   Or…was it about that LINE exchange earlier?

   Junior knows that Ter is trying to make him jealous, and he actually gets a little jealous but doesn’t let it show.

The voice of Phii Hill from the restaurant last night popped into my head.

…He’s jealous of me?

   Gasp, oh my, my face is burning.

   “Dog with a bone.” Junior said, half-jokingly, seeming more like he wanted to tease Phii Hill.

“Hold on, what’s going on here?” Phii Meili intervened before Phii Hill loosened his arm. I quickly moved away from him.

“Nothing.” Phii Hill replied, his voice returning to normal, different from the previously cold, eerie tone.

“Hill, Fern brought you some water.” a sweet voice rang out, causing everyone here to look at Phii Baifern (whom I recognized from photos) who was holding a glass of sweet water. She walked over to Phii Hill and handed it to him.

“Thanks.” Phii Hill said as he took the glass. I don’t know why, but I didn’t like the scene unfolding before my eyes.

“What are you guys doing?” Phii Baifern was smaller than I expected, slightly shorter than me. She was wearing a short pleated skirt, making her look like a cute little kid.

“We’re taking photos of Junior. It’s good that you’re here, Fern, come, let’s take some pictures.” Phii Meili pulled Phii Fern over for me to take photos. “This is Nong Ter, who’s taking photos today. Oh, today I’ve introduced this junior so many times, maybe I should just announce him over the loudspeaker!”

“Sure, I saw the speaker is almost fixed. Meili, you should go borrow it.” Phii Fern suggested, her voice bright and innocent, making me feel somewhat gloomy in comparison.

“Oh, that’s great. We’ll borrow a mic from Phii Napdao later, but first, let’s take some photos.” and then I had to start taking photos again. No point in complaining now, we haven’t even done half of them, and the rehearsal hasn’t even started yet!    Phii Hill stood there watching me take photos without saying anything. Why come and stand here to pressure me, T^T? Phii Fern changed her pose several times until Phii Meili finally said it was okay!

“Hill, Mild has been looking for you for ages. Let’s go, Phii Napdao said we should line up already.” Phii Thanmild came from who knows where, suddenly grabbed Phii Hill’s arm, oh no. I really didn’t want to face Phii Thanmild. “And what are you guys doing here?”

“Taking photos, Nong Ter is here to take photos today. Sigh, can I record this sentence for later?” Phii Meili said, rolling her eyes upwards.

“Oh, Nong Ter, you take photos too? I didn’t know that.” Phii Thanmild smiled at me, still holding onto Phii Hill’s arm, and the one whose arm was grabbed didn’t seem to mind at all.

“Yes, I’m still practicing.” I said with a forced smile.

“That’s great, can you take photos of the medical stars and moons too? Oh, and Fern, hello, aren’t you supposed to be over with the management department?” Phii Thanmild turned to speak to Phii Fern, who was secretly making a sour face.

Just a moment…I can sense some kind of energy as if a war is about to start.

“I brought sweet drinks for Hill.” Phii Fern smiled broadly and pointed to one of Phii Hill’s hands holding a glass of sweet drink. Phii Meili moved closer to me, whispering softly.

“And now what? Three Kingdoms war, I’m so tired of seeing this every time. Doesn’t Doctor Hill get annoyed?” Phii Meili whispered, rolling her eyes. I nodded in understanding; if it were me, I’d be stressed out, like in a drama where they’re fighting over the lead.

Phii Hill sighed softly before gently removing Phii Thanmild’s hand and returning the glass to Phii Fern. Both of them looked quite confused. I was also wondering what he was doing, and why was he looking at me like that!?

“Ter, can I borrow your phone for a moment?”

“Why do you want it?”

“Just give it to me.”

“No.”

“Don’t be stubborn.”

“…”

“Disobedient kids need to be punished, you know that, right?”

He’s threatening me again!! Everyone sees his true nature now, right, T^T? How can he sound so calm while threatening? I reluctantly took out my phone from my pocket and handed it to Phii Hill.

Phii Hill took my phone, did something with it for a while, and then handed it back to me.

What did he do?

   Don’t tell me he deleted Junior’s LINE?

   He really did, he actually deleted it…

   “Since we’ve met, it reminds me of the old days, we should go out sometime,

Nong Ter, right? Hill, Phii Napdao is calling for you.” Phii Thanmild gently shook Phii Hill’s arm in a coaxing manner. God help me, this is the last thing I wanted to see.

“Mild, go ahead.” Phii Hill said without taking his eyes off me. Why is he staring so intensely? People will start to notice!    “Why?”

“Just go.” Phii Hill repeated, his voice now showing a hint of irritation. But Phii Thanmild still didn’t stop.

“Oh, Nong Ter, can I have your Facebook? I’ve forgotten your facebook page.” Phii Thanmild turned to talk to me instead. I hesitated for a moment before giving her my new Facebook name; I couldn’t find a reason to refuse.

“Oh, this account looks newly created. Did you change his account?” Phii Thanmild looked down at her phone, and after finding my profile, she looked up to ask, “Why did you change it?”    Why did I change it…?

Because of what happened, which Phii Thanmild should know, right? Why ask me!!

“The old account was inaccessible.” I dodged the direct answer.

“That’s strange, you’ve used that old account for many years, and suddenly you can’t access it, that’s odd.” Phii Thanmild looked puzzled, but her eyes betrayed that she was mocking me, “And you hardly have any friends on this one, none from the old school, why?”

I didn’t like this at all…Why ask like this? What do you want? To rub it in?    I went quiet…No one said anything; it seemed everyone sensed the atmosphere was turning sour. Because Phii Thanmild suddenly said something odd, and I was clearly not happy either. After a while, I heard Phii Hill sigh lightly before he grabbed my hand and led me away from the group. Normally, I might have resisted, but right now, I was actually glad he was taking me away from this incredibly uncomfortable situation.

   “Dr. Hill, where are you taking the freshman!?” Phii Meili shouted after Phii Hill, who didn’t even look back. When I glanced back, everyone looked confused, especially Phii Fern who seemed just as clueless, unlike Phii Thanmild, who was blatantly showing her anger.

Thanmild Thanwarin – 1 minute ago

   Someone who never tried for anything, yet got everything. It’s not fair, isn’t it?

   

   EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 7: Through a Lens

   “Ter, hey, Ter, come here quick!” I heard my good roommate’s voice from outside the bathroom. What’s so urgent, I’m in the middle of a relaxing shower!    “What is it? I’m showering!” I shouted back, my voice echoing in the small bathroom, not sure if he could hear me from outside.

“You’ll regret it if you don’t come, I’m telling you, it’s hot news.”

“Alright, alright, I’m almost done.” I quickly dried off, put on some comfortable clothes ready for bed, then hurried out to North.    “What’s the big deal? What’s going on?” I asked.

“Here, you said it wasn’t a date, huh? Look at this, holding hands.” He pointed at his computer screen.

Hill Ratchakit – added a new photo – 24 minutes ago

   #OwnerOfMyWatch

   It was a photo from when we held hands at the temple in the morning. I didn’t even know when he took the picture because I was looking away, trying not to pay attention to him. And there was my old watch in the shot too, from that angle, you could see both our shoes.

Hey, hey, hey!!! What’s this “Owner Of My Watch” business?! It’s obvious it’s a guy’s hand, so there’s no doubt it’s not one of the three girls everyone suspected.    Even though they still don’t know who exactly it is, but this…goodness, isn’t this too much? We haven’t even cleared things up from last time!

Hmph. And holding hands too…

So, he really meant to flirt with me, right?

Are you serious, T^T

“Act cool, Ter. Now explain this picture, it’s worth ten points.”

“Well…he asked to hold my hand.”

“And you let him? Look here, then you say you were not okay with it. Oh, come on.”

“I really wasn’t okay with it, believe me.”

“How can I believe that? With all this evidence. If it was any clearer, he’d have to post a picture of you.”

“No way. Don’t post it, or how am I supposed to survive his fans?”

“See, that’s why he hasn’t posted yet, waiting for things to settle before going public.”

“Going public my ass. No way.”

“Sure. No way, we’ll see. You said the same last time.”

“Oh, come on, help me out here, what should I do?”

“Do what? You don’t have to do anything. Just sit tight, and Phii Hill will come to you soon enough, guaranteed.”

“Guaranteed at your place! Stop teasing.” I couldn’t help but snap at him. He’s just joking around, but this is serious, “What should I do about this?”

“Just stay cool. Why are you taking it so seriously?”

“He might just be pretending to make me let my guard down.”

“You’re so pessimistic. You’re biased.” North said. You don’t understand, it’s more complicated than that, “Open up a bit. It won’t hurt.”

“North, it’s not that simple. Opening up isn’t easy, especially for someone who’s been hurt before.”

“You’ve been hurt before? Why? Can you tell me?”

I didn’t answer, staying silent for a moment before deciding to use his computer to scroll through the comments. Of course, everyone was shocked that the person Phii Hill was talking about was a guy. Some didn’t believe it, saying Phii Hill just wanted to stop people from flirting with him. Others were upset because it wasn’t who they were rooting for.

I stopped reading the comments because they turned into meaningless arguments among the fans, especially the three girls. The admin of the Cute Boy page had also shared and played up the issue.

Could this be considered a good thing, that he didn’t post a photo of my face? At least I’m still the dark horse. That’s good, I guess. I don’t know what will happen next, to be honest, I’m secretly not confident. I’m not sure…if what I’m afraid of really happens…

I probably wouldn’t be able to handle it…this time it would be worse than before.

It’s not wrong, is it…if I want to build a wall to protect my heart…

Sigh, things have escalated to this point, I can’t keep it to myself anymore. Maybe I can tell North about it now. At least there’ll be someone to vent to and give advice. I turned to look at North, and he looked back at me.

“I used to like him back in middle school.” I finally decided to tell him.

“There you go. You never told me.”

“Sorry, I didn’t really want to talk about it. Honestly, I didn’t even want to think about it.”

“Alright, I understand. So you’re okay to talk about it now, right?”

“I’m okay, things have gotten to this point, I’m confused. Don’t know what to do next.” North nodded in understanding and looked ready to listen. I took a quiet breath before starting, “But he…liked my sister.”

“Oh, that’s fate.”

“And as for me, who liked him, I was stuck with hope and an impossible love for almost two years. It was torturous, but I found happiness in it.” I held my breath, trying not to let my voice shake, because every time I talk about this, it hurts, “When my sister confessed she liked him, what could I do? I had to help her.”

“You were the bridge between him and your sister then.”

“Yeah, and why didn’t those two just date? I could’ve moved on, it was incredibly painful, until he graduated and left school. It took me a year to get over it, then he comes back to ask me out, here we are. At first, I didn’t even know he studied here.”

“You’d naturally have some bias then. Did he ever talk about middle school with your sister?”

“He never mentioned it, like nothing ever happened.”

“Hmm, that’s strange, did he show any signs back in middle school? Like, maybe he had feelings for you too?”

“I think not, he’s usually kind to everyone, including my sister.”

“At first, I thought he was serious about you. But now, knowing this, I’m starting to doubt, could he be faking it?”    “I’m also at a loss for what to do.”

“And you’ve already moved on, right?”

“Hmm, I think so too.”

“Then just reject him.”

“I already rejected him. But he’s so shameless, he said he wasn’t asking me out, just letting me know.”

“Then there’s nothing you can do but accept it. He probably won’t come back if you think rationally. Who wants to be hurt repeatedly…But since you can’t do much about it, you just have to let him keep flirting with you.”

“Shit. That won’t do, I’m the one in trouble here.”

“So what are you going to do? If he won’t listen to your rejection, maybe he’s serious about you. These things take time to prove.”

“Prove what? No, I don’t want that. Is there really no other choice for me?” I started to argue against what North was suggesting. I can’t just let it go like this.

“If you’re sure you don’t feel anything, then what’s the harm?” That’s the thing,

North, I’m not sure, that’s why I came to you for advice! “Just endure it for a while. If he’s just teasing you, he’ll eventually stop. But if he’s really serious, you’ll find out soon enough. Then you might consider opening up.”

“Is that so?” I asked uncertainty, but North’s reasoning made sense. There really didn’t seem to be any other option.

“Let it be like that. Let him do whatever he wants. Don’t care about it, or he’ll get more encouraged. Just stay cool.”

“Alright, alright.” I responded. I’m trying not to care, but as you can see, it’s really hard!

Sigh…I sighed again. After venting to someone, I felt a little less burdened. At least now I have someone to consult with. I picked up my phone to play a game to take a break from thinking about this.

Ding!

A notification from chat.

Peerapat Preem: Nong Ter, this is Phii Preem from the club.

   Easter Panupong: Yes, Phii Preem?

   Why is Phii Preem messaging me? Is he going to ask me to have dinner with the club president again? No way!

   Peerapat Preem: I’d like to ask for a small favor, your photos on your FB are really nice, I was wondering if you could help us take some pictures of the club activities.

   Easter Panupong: Okay, but I’m not good at photographing people.

   Peerapat Preem: That’s fine. Just need to send the photos to the teacher.

   Easter Panupong: Someone else might do a better job, I think.    Peerapat Preem: We don’t really want outsiders taking photos, we’re worried about them posting the photos elsewhere too.

   Easter Panupong: Oh, alright then.

   Peerapat Preem: Thank you, please bring your camera tomorrow.

   Easter Panupong: Okay. 🙂

   Peerapat Preem: Oh, and could you also take some pictures of the rehearsal for the second-year stars and moons’ fashion show?

   !!!!!

I really don’t want to go…Sigh. I could only think while wiping my camera lens, taking photos for club activities is one thing, but photographing the stars and moons, especially with Phii Hill as one of the moons and Phii Thanmild as one of the stars, that’s not okay at all.

And the watch, I can’t wear it anymore, what a stroke of bad luck. I’ve worn that watch for years, and even after taking it off, there’s still a faint mark on my wrist. If I want to get used to it, I’ll have to buy a new one, which is quite a hassle since this watch feels like a part of my body.

North was turning around annoyingly on the bed, not waking up even though it was past nine. He might be irritating, but his life isn’t easy either, especially since he’s about to start a part-time job, and I was thinking of joining him for that.    After cleaning the lens and checking my gear, I slung my camera over my shoulder, ready to take photos. Lately, it feels like I’ve been taking a lot of pictures.

Today, I’ve been assigned as the photographer again.

Come on, keep it up, Ter, this too shall pass!

   When I arrived at the club, it seemed I was a bit late; everyone had already started working. I looked around for the team leader since I didn’t know where to start taking photos.

“Nong Ter, how are you, are you better now?” I turned around to see Phii Bua waving at me and approaching. I smiled in response.

Easter Panupong: Yes, I’m sorry for worrying you.

“It’s okay, as long as you’re better now. You were gone for a few days, and I was really worried, so I had Hill take you to the doctor. So, about yesterday when you went out together.” Phii Bua leaned in closer, whispering, “Did you see the photo

Hill posted? Do you know who it might be?”

“…Uh, no. I left early.” I had to lie in this situation. If I said we went sightseeing together, that would clarify things.

“Oh, so you mean he went to take you to the doctor, and then he went out with someone else, right?” Phii Bua pondered with a thoughtful expression, “But skipping work to go out, that’s really infuriating. He has no responsibility towards his work, while everyone else is working so hard.”

“…That’s right.” Phii Bua’s words felt like a knife stabbing straight into the heart of this Ter, oof, it hit me hard.

“What are you two gossiping about now?” Phii Pim’s voice came from behind.

Both I and Phii Bua turned to greet her.

“Uh, I was just here, about to ask about the photo shoot.”

“Oh, so you’re going to have Nong Ter take the photos?” Phii Bua asked.

“Yeah, my camera isn’t that great anymore, and I saw that Nong Ter’s photos on

FB were good, so I thought I’d ask him for a favor.”

“That’s great, can you help out? We’re all pretty busy, so we can’t go take photos at the star and moon walk rehearsal.”

“Do I have to take photos there too?” I asked to make sure.

“Yes, take photos of all the couples from every department. Oh, and there was another thing suggested yesterday, to also do video interviews where they talk about the star and moon competition.”    “What!? I have to do interviews too?”

This is getting worse. What’s this all about? Taking photos was already a mouthful!

   “Just a little, there’ll be another senior to do the informal interviews, just small promotional stuff. Nong Ter, you just need to be the cameraman.”

“Uh…okay.” I reluctantly agreed, gritting my teeth. Looks like I’m stuck now, sigh, what kind of fate is this for Ter, T^T

“But the interviews are on another day, right?” Phii Bua turned to askPhii Pim.    “Another day, yes. Today we’ll just take photos of the rehearsal. I’ll have Mei Li help out.” Phii Pim turned to smile at me, “Meili is a friend of mine, she oversees the star and moon competition, so I asked her to assist you with the photography.”

“Oh, that’s good then.” Sigh…just having a camera can be this troublesome, huh? “I’ll go get Meili, Ter, wait here for a moment.” Phii Pim said before she walked away.

“Then I’ll keep Nong Ter company while we wait.” Phii Bua said, “It’s a bit tiring, having to take all these photos. Actually, we do have someone who takes photos, but last year, he posted them elsewhere, ruining our surprise.”

“Why did he post them?”

“I don’t know, it’s a picture of Hill too, taken during the moon contest and club activities. That person must really like him, so they posted it on the Cute Boy page. Too bad we have to take it again; if we use the same person there is a guarantee they will post it, but it would be a spoiler.”

“Oh, so this time when I take the photos, I have to send them to the club, right?”    “Send them to Pim, she’ll select and edit the photos herself. And Nong Ter, you will get paid for your skills, it’s not free, right?”    “Not that much, really. I don’t have any great skills.”

“Come on, I believe Nong Ter can do it. Keep up the good work.”

“…Okay, I’ll do my best.” Sigh, I wonder if I can handle it…After chatting for a while, the team leader and another woman approached. It must be Sister Meili, but she looks more like a tomboy than a lady.

“Hey, what did you say, Bew? Is this the junior you mentioned? Oh, he’s cute, just like I’d want to pinch.” Sister Meili smiled with a mischievous grin before reaching over to gently pinch my cheek. Ugh, I’m not a kid to be pinched.

“How many times have I told you it’s not Bew, it’s Bua!”

“Okay, okay, whatever. Anyway, what’s your name, junior?”

“It’s Easter, but just call me Ter.”

“Okay, Nong Ter, today we’re going to take pictures of the rehearsal walk, right?

We’ll do it in the morning; it’s too hot in the afternoon to walk. We’ll handle the club’s work in the afternoon. We’ll start walking at half past ten, we still have plenty of time.”

“That’s good, Meili, take good care of him, if anything happens to my junior, I’ll blame you.” Phii Bua said in jest.

“I will take very good care of him, not even letting an ant crawl on him, but a crab might walk on his shoulder.” Phii Meili mimicked a crab walking on my shoulder. I smiled to cover my embarrassment. I didn’t feel bad; in fact, I found it funny because the seniors were quite lovable.

“Hey, what were you gossiping about with Nong Ter?” Phii Pim asked.

“Oh, you can’t miss out on any gossip, can you? So manly.” Phii Bua teased, “It’s about Hill’s latest photo, have you seen it, Meili? I tell you, it’s the best.”    “I’ve seen it. It’s no ordinary photo. And the person with him is a guy too.”    Gasp, why did the topic shift to this? Can I excuse myself from here?

   “Really? I didn’t even notice, thought it was one of the girls chasing after him.” Phii Pim said.

“You should get your eyes checked; it’s clearly a man’s hand. Girls must be devastated. He’s handsome and a moon of the faculty, but in the end, the one he likes is a guy.” Phii Meili said with relish, not knowing that she was talking about me. Uh…why am I starting to feel embarrassed?

“And have you found out anything more?”

“Our star and moon group was gossiping, Hill got pressed for information repeatedly, but he didn’t open his mouth at all, just saying he hasn’t won him over yet. Who would believe that? Holding hands like that and not melting a bit, if it were me, I’d be swooning just from the way Dr. Hill looks.”

Actually, I almost melted just from the way he looked at me too…

“If it were me, I’d be dead from that wallet scene. Not choosing Dr. Hill is stupid, I’m telling you. We keep staring, those star and moon group girls are so annoying, staring back too.”

Oh…does that mean I’m the stupid one now? Sigh, don’t scold me. I have my reasons.

   “But really, we don’t know who it is, can’t even guess. If we knew who it was, I’d go ask for some of that good karma, maybe I’d get a handsome boyfriend too.”    I’m not someone with good karma, Meili, you can believe that.

“Hill is really hard to read, huh? Known him for years, and he’s never looked at anyone like that.” Phii Pim sighed.

“Exactly. We don’t know if that person was wearing the watch or not. If they were, someone should have noticed, maybe there’d be some clues.”

“Uh…it’s almost ten o’clock, should we go?” I interjected into the conversation. If they kept gossiping like this, it was going to be a long day. If they investigate this much…one day someone might come at me with a knife to get answers, thankfully I didn’t wear the watch.

“Oh, right, sorry for getting carried away, let’s go, Nong Ter.” Mei Li linked arms with me and gently pushed me forward.

“Then we’ll continue with our work. Good luck, Mei Li.”

“Alright, alright.” Mei Li waved back at them before leading me to the rehearsal area for the star and moon walk.

“Come on.” Mei Li beckoned me into the room. I took off my shoes and followed her in. This must be the dressing room because there were lots of costumes, and several people were getting their makeup done. It looked a bit chaotic. I walked in slowly, scanning around to see where he was.

Not here.

“Even though it’s just a rehearsal, you still need to put on makeup for the photos, right? Come over here, let’s get some behind-the-scenes shots.”    “Should I take photos now? They aren’t done with their makeup yet.”

“Yes, take photos. It’s for behind-the-scenes, come on, take a picture of this one, this is Fah, the star from the Agriculture Faculty, Fah, smile for the camera.” Mei Li said, and the girl named Fah, who was getting her makeup done, turned to smile.

So I raised my camera to take the shot.

“Let’s see.” Mei Li leaned in to look at the photo I just took. I showed her, “Wow, this looks good, nice lighting, Fah looks great on camera, let’s take another one.” I took another photo as instructed by Mei Li, “Beautiful, you’re rocking it, even though you haven’t finished with the mascara.”

“Oh, Mei Li, who are the ones practicing the walk today?” Fah asked after posing for me.

“Napdao, but I haven’t seen the boss yet.”

“Napdao, huh? Oh no, today’s going to end at midnight for sure.” Fah said, looking gloomy and moaning.

“Not really. If you walk well, you can finish on time.”

“Someone like me, Napdao, isn’t easy to please. Last time, I walked so much my legs hurt and became Arthit.”

“Come on, I’ll help check too. Go shoot somewhere else, add some lip color, Fah, this one looks too pale, might not show up from a distance.”

“Sure.” and then Phii Meili took me to shoot other sections, including a satellite beauty contest. Normally, if you just walk normally, the stars and moon would just wear school uniforms, but satellites can’t do that, they have to be extravagant, right? I saw the girls choosing their outfits big time.

“Nong Ter, come shoot this beauty quickly.” Phii Meili called me, “Here’s

Fondao, the nurse star.”

I turned to look; Phii Fondao is one of those chasing after Phii Hill, right? She’s so pretty…She’s slightly taller than me, and even without makeup, she’s stunning.    “Are you the one taking photos today?” Phii Fondao smiled at me. Oh, such a beautiful smile. I like it.

“Yes, may I trouble you for a bit?” I bowed slightly.

“Not at all. We’re the ones troubling you. Make sure to take pretty photos of me, but don’t make me look fat.” Phii Fondao said jokingly.

“Oh, if she’s fat, who in this world could be thin? She won’t look fat from any angle.” Phii Meili retorted, “Alright, let’s get to shooting. She’s going to post these on IG for promotion.”

“My IG isn’t an advertising space, you know. If you want a promotion, there should be an ad fee.”

“You’re crazy, promoting her would promote you too. Come on, pose for the camera.” I raised my camera to shoot Phii Fondao. She slightly tilted her body and posed with a small, charming smile. This girl really knows how to pose. Have I complimented her too much?

“Wow, these photos came out nice too, can you send them to me right away? I’ll post them on IG now.”

“Sure.” I managed to send the photo via Wi-Fi to my smartphone. Shooting people is quite okay, I guess. Next time, I should find someone to shoot with.    “Okay, posted, I’m off, need to do my makeup.” Phii Fondao smiled at me and Phii Meili, then headed to the makeup area.

“Now we just have to shoot the moon, right? Let’s go to the other room.”

“Are the moons in another room?”

“Exactly, how could girls dress up with men, but trans women don’t count, they’re considered half women.” Oh, I forgot about that. Indeed, the whole room was full of women, why didn’t I notice? So it’s not strange that Phii HIll’s not in this room.

I followed Phii Meili to another room. Oh no, I really don’t want to go in, can I take ten minutes to brace myself? But Phii Meili didn’t seem to care about my reluctance, she quickly slid open the glass door, and the cold air hit my face.    “Hey, the handsome Meili is here, and she brought someone to take photos!” Phii Meili opened the door and shouted cheerfully, causing all the moon guys to turn and look our way in unison.

“Hi, the handsome guys! Miss Meili is here, bringing my little brother for some photos!” Miss PhiiMeili shouted cheerfully as she opened the door. Everyone in the room turned towards her without any prior notice from Miss Emmy.

I’ll scream and make a fuss!!!

I couldn’t help but scan the room for someone I knew, at least to know where they were so I could avoid them.

“Have you arrived?” came a deep, soft voice beside me out of the blue, Mr.

PhiiHill! He always catches me off guard. I nearly jumped out of my skin.    “Dr. Hill, you’re so cruel, not even wearing makeup, oh my God, but just setting your hair makes you so dashing, it’s like you’re draggin my heart along!” Miss PhiiMeili said, shaking her arms and giving a big, shy smile. He’s really handsome, even without much effort on his hair. But with it styled, his aura just gets even more lethal. What is this? When I style my hair, I don’t look this good.

“Did you bring him for photos?” Phii Hill asked Phii Meili.

“Yes, yes, this is Nong Ter, he’s in the same club, you probably know each other.”

“We do know each other.” Mr. PhiiHill turned to me with a gentle smile. Ugh, I’m going to die, can I even take photos with my hands shaking like this?

   “Great, let’s have him take photos of you, Hill first then.”

“The light is better over there,” Phii Hill pointed to the back before leading the way. I followed helplessly, with Phii Meili trailing behind.

“Wow, the light is really beautiful, we’ll definitely get some great shots!” Phii Meili was so excited she shook my arm to hurry up. I looked at him through the camera lens…It’s not good for my heart. If I have to keep photographing him, I’ll need a break every ten minutes, or my blood pressure will spike for sure.

Why does his smile have such an impact on my heart?

“So you’ve become my photographer, have you?” Phii Hill smiled so much his eyes crinkled. Is he looking at the camera like that or at me…

Oh my God. I can’t do this, I need a tripod, my hands are shaking too much!!

 

EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter  6: Owner of the Watch

   Sigh…

“Can I court you, Ter, can I court you, Ter, can I court you, Ter?”

   That same question kept echoing in my head. North told me to be direct if there was anything to say, and I’ve been direct in my refusal, but why does this guy next to me still have that bright, cheerful smile as if nothing happened?

“What are you smiling at!?” I asked with a hint of irritation in my voice. I was almost having a heart attack here, but why does the guy asking still look so calm?! Isn’t he serious when he asks?

“I didn’t ask…I just stated it.” and then he flashed that heart-stealing smile at me,

Phii Hill smiled with his eyes crinkling. I can honestly say, in all the photos I’ve looked at on his page, there’s none where he smiles like this; it’s like there’s an aura shining down on him.

Wait, why was I looking at his photos? Just out of curiosity, I guess!

“It’s not funny either.” I turned my face away, secretly making a sour face.

“Yes. It’s not funny.”

“…”

“I’m serious.”

“I don’t want to!” Hmph. That cheerful face of his really gets on my nerves, could he at least pretend a little less?

He had never said anything like this to me before; he rarely showed any signs of affection towards me. He was just kind to everyone, I guess he could tell how I felt, but I was not the person he should be saying such things to.

It should be ‘Christy’ instead.

Am I not just a bridge for love?

“But I’ve already ‘done it’ with you.” He said.

“Phii!!!” I accidentally shouted, drawing attention to us. I had to turn and smile to cover up my embarrassment. This crazy guy!! What are you saying!!! And still giving me that sweet smile! Argh, I want to crawl into the ground and escape.

“Say my name sweetly.” Phii Hill whispered softly, “Like that day.”

“…Stop talking!!” My face turned even redder. I tried to sound firm and not to shout again.

“Yes, yes.” Phii Hill smiled indulgently, like he was looking at a cute little animal, like a kitten or a bunny, “But I’ve already claimed you.” He reached out and gently touched my neck with his finger. I quickly brushed it away.    Hmph, he made me remember that day when he…ugh, left a red mark on my neck, which took almost a week to go away.

   “…” I was at a loss for words. How could he say something so direct? I turned my face away again to hide my blushing, and Phii Hill didn’t say anything more.

Even with the sound of the rain so loud, I could clearly hear my own heartbeat.

It was starting to beat too hard!

The big hand didn’t let go of mine. Even though my hand was cold and wet from the surrounding air and the temperature dropped, Phii Hill slightly adjusted his grip and gave my hand a gentle squeeze as if to comfort something, though I wasn’t sure what he was comforting.

His hand, though large, was softer than I expected and warm against my damp, cold hand. Normally, I wouldn’t dare to hold someone’s hand with mine like this. It’s embarrassing, right, with all this sweat? Doesn’t he mind?

Come to think of it…we’ve never held hands for this long before.

We let the rain continue its symphony while we stood in silence. I didn’t know what to say, and neither did the person beside me. I wanted to believe that what I heard before was just my ears playing tricks on me.

Soon enough, the sky cleared up, the clouds moved away, and the rain started to lighten. What should I do now? Should I rush back?

“Are you hungry? I’ll take you to get something to eat.” Phii Hill spoke up first, amidst the returning chatter of the crowd.

“No, I want to go back.” I was really starting to feel like going back. Staying with him any longer would be too much.

“It’s cold now, let me treat you.”

“…” What should I do? I really want to get back to the dorm. But now my stomach’s starting to growl. If I go back to the dorm, I’ll have to go out again to eat anyway. Might as well eat out for just a bit longer.

Rrrrrrrr

The phone vibrated. I checked my pocket and realized it wasn’t my phone, but Phii Hill’s. Not long after, he took his phone out of his pants pocket and answered the call. I tried to eavesdrop.

(Hill, where are you?)

   “What’s wrong?”

(Mild came looking for you at the club. Couldn’t find you. Bua say you took

Nong Ter to the doctor, is that correct?)

   “Oh, right, what’s up?”

(Is it Nong Easter, right? So, Hill knows that the kid studies here.)

   “Um.”

(What a coincidence, coming this far…Mild thinks the kid might have followed you to come study here.)

   “And you called to say?”

(About the event we’re organizing. The club wants the second-year stars and moons to do a fashion show to promote the upcoming star and moon contest next month. Didn’t you know? That’s strange, I thought you would be presenting the show.)

   “No, I had no idea.”

(Really? Hmm, but come and rehearse the walk too. We’re practicing right next to the club. Actually, we’re supposed to start today, that’s why Mind came to find Hill, but he wasn’t here.)

   “Who’s in charge of the rehearsal?”

(Phii Napdao, a third-year.)

   “Oh, then let’s go tomorrow. I’m not free today.”

(What? Just a stomachache shouldn’t take that long to see a doctor.)

   “…”

(Okay, okay, then tell Mild to practice alone, that’s bad. See you tomorrow, bye.)    Then Phii Hill hung up. I had been eavesdropping so intently that I had moved closer to him without noticing, but when I realized, I quickly moved back.

“It’s not good to eavesdrop, you know.” The tall figure said, in a playful tone, not really angry.

“Uh…no.” The person who called referred to themselves as “Mild.” probably Phii Thanmild, because she asked if he had met the junior yet. That’s me. But to say that I followed him here, that’s not true at all! I hope he doesn’t think that too.    Do the stars and moon have to practice walking again? Then Phii Hill andPhii Thanmild must go for a walk together…

“So, are we going for dinner or not?”

Maybe it’s better if we don’t go. Phii Hill should be practicing walking withPhii Thanmild, right?

“I’m not going.” I said softly.

“I’ve already made a reservation too, it’ll be quick, and the place is delicious.”

“…”

“Plus, they have great cake and cocoa.”

“It’s better to go practice.” I said. I didn’t mean to be sarcastic.    “No, I want to take you out for dinner more than to go to practice.”    Hmph…damn, that smile…

“….Okay, I’ll go.” I figured I was hungry after all. And I wanted some cocoa. Since he went out of his way to bring me to this nice photo spot, we might as well eat together. The other party smiled contentedly before leading the way to the car while still holding my hand. So I had to follow along easily.

“You’re cute when you’re not being stubborn, you know.”

…

The fancy car pulled away from the temple’s parking lot. I sat in the passenger seat, holding both hands together, still feeling warm…It was starting to get a little dark outside, not because it was evening yet, but because the rain had just stopped, so the sky was still somewhat overcast.

I gazed out at the clear window with small droplets clinging to it. This place at night is really beautiful. The lights along the path lit up, compensating for the light from Arthit, blocked by the clouds.

The person beside me didn’t say anything, so I had time to space out for quite a while, thinking about Phii Thanmild who called earlier. I never thought I’d meet both of them here. It seems likePhii Thanmild might be the one following Phii Hill. I don’t know. Maybe I’m thinking too negatively, but her demeanor has made me guess this for a long time now. If Phii Thanmild really likes Phii Hill, she must really like him a lot, to go to such lengths.

Sigh…what about me then?

Before I could think any further, the luxury car pulled into a spacious parking lot where someone was waving to guide us to an empty spot. The parking lot was almost full. I glanced inside to see a large, beautifully decorated restaurant with a fountain at the front, which from a distance looked like a pond with lights around it.

Quite luxurious. If you didn’t book in advance, you’d probably have to wait years for a spot, it’s that packed.

Once parked, I got out of the car without waiting for Phii Hill to open the door for me. After all, he’s not my chauffeur. I followed his tall figure rather stiffly. Phii Hill seemed like he was trying to discreetly take my hand. No way would I let him!    “Hello, do you have a reservation?” asked the young woman at the counter with a wai.

“Yes, for two.”

“Under what name is the reservation?”

“Rachakit.”

“Okay…please follow me, sir.” and then both of us followed another staff member. We arrived at a table by the pond, which had a barrier around it. I noticed some fish occasionally surfacing, probably caught here for the customers to enjoy fresh.

I sat down opposite Phii Hill.

Phii Hill smiled at me.

As usual, I looked away again.

“Is the atmosphere nice?”

“It’s…nice.” I replied as I reached for the restaurant menu. It was another candlelit setting. Soft classical music played romantically in the background.

Hmm…why is every place we’ve been today so romantic?

Expensive! …was the first thought that came to mind. It’s not necessary to spend this much on every meal, or is it for a special occasion…Phii Hill did say he was treating today. I feel a bit awkward about it, but if I had to pay, it would hurt.

Nothing on the menu was under two hundred, not even the desserts.

Maybe I should just order water…

“What would you like to order?”

“Well…” and then Phii Hill ordered a lot of things. I just kept quiet; all the dishes I liked or could eat, he had already ordered.

“Ter, would you like anything else?” the senior in front of me asked.

“Uh…no, thanks.” I replied awkwardly and closed the menu.

“Don’t you like this place?” he asked with a concerned tone after the waiter had left.

“N…no.”

“Or maybe because the items are expensive and Ter feels awkward about it?”    How did he know that…I thought to myself but didn’t respond.

“Then next time we can go somewhere you like.”

There’s a next time? I could only give a faint smile, unsure if he noticed. I took out my phone to play with it to avoid further conversation.

   Is he starting to flirt with me now?

   Sigh…This is making things difficult for me. Normally, just meeting him is tough, now I have to deal with being flirted with…or maybe he’s just joking.

   I scrolled through my own Facebook feed.

Cute Boy & Girl – MU – 30 minutes ago

   The hashtag trend on Twitter #WhoseWatchIsThis, is just overwhelming. Even I, as the admin of the page, have no clue what it’s all about. We can only wait to see how things move forward. So, please stop messaging the page about this; the admin has a headache from this issue. If we find out who it is, we’ll definitely make a grand reveal (I heard it might be a dark horse).    : This might be a dark horse; none of the girls have ever seen anyone wear that watch before.

   : But Phii Thanmild seems pretty close with him. I heard there will be a star and moon catwalk too. Is the stage going to collapse? There’s definitely going to be a battle.

   : Yeah, can stars from other faculties compete with those from the same faculty? That’s right. They’ve already been seen walking arm-in-arm on stage.    : I still support Phii Fon, she seems to have better chemistry with him. I even saw them making eye contact during last year’s competition, looking at each other across faculties.

   Is this just my imagination?

   : If it’s someone else, I can’t think of who. Maybe a first-year?

   It might be Phii Mild, I think. She’s been posting a lot like this lately. Plus, she’s promoting the star and moon of the second year all over her feed.

   : Whoever it is, they’re super lucky, let me tell you. What did they do to deserve Phii Hill as their boyfriend?

   I scrolled through the comments. Some of them were really creative. Out of nowhere, I’ve become the dark horse. I have to admit, whoever ends up as Phii Hill’s partner is really lucky.

Cute Boy & Girl – MU – 1 hour ago

   Let’s take a break from Dr. Hill for a bit, shall we? Let’s look at Dr. Johan instead. Many fans missed him, so I went through fire and water to find the latest pic of Dr. Johan. Look here, who did he meet at the pub? Wow, his aura is striking, from his clothes to his hair, watch, shoes. He really doesn’t leave the house unless he’s dressed in millions, girls don’t need to pay, he’ll pay himself. P.S. He’s also close friends with Dr. Hill. Which gang can match this radiance?

   A friend of Phii Hill…unlike Phii Hill who seems composed, this Johan looks like more of a bad boy.

“What are you looking at?” Suddenly, the voice from across the table rang out along with my phone being snatched away. W-wait, did you just snatch it like that?

“This is Johan.”

“…” I didn’t respond, just looked confused.

“Do you like him?” Dr. Hill asked with a smile, Phii Hill who usually smiles. But why does this smile feel creepy? I swallowed hard, my throat suddenly dry.

“Huh?”

“Do you like him?” That creepy smile again…why does it suddenly feel cold?    “Uh…” I didn’t know how to respond. I don’t even know this Johan yet, but if I were to tease, just for fun, what would happen? “He’s quite handsome, isn’t he?”    “Then someone must die today.” Phii Hill said with a cold smile, his voice flat. Is he really mad? Why does he look so scary? Phii Hill returned my phone and picked up his own to make a call.

(Hello) The voice on the other end answered, Phii Hill intentionally turned up the volume so I could hear.

“Jo, where are you?”

Huh? Calling Johan? Why?

(At the condo, what’s up?)

   “We need to clear something up.”

(Huh? What’s the matter?)

   “The page posted your photo.”

(What about the page posting it? What did I do wrong?)

   “…”

(Hill, dude, don’t be silent, why? The page posted my pic, what’s up?)

   “There is someone who said you look good.”

Hold on, Phii Hill, take it easy. I was just joking.

(Oh crap, what can I do if I’m handsome? I’m annoyed with myself. But which junior was it?)    “The one I’m flirting with.”

(Was it a freshman?)

   “Yeah.”

(Oh, I’m doomed then. Is the freshman with you now?)

   “He is.”

(Let me talk to them.)

   “The freshman is listening.”

(…Uh, freshie, I’m sorry. I might be handsome, but Hill is much better than me. Really, you should choose him. For my safety too, Hill is a great surgeon, what if he operates on me and screws up?)

   Er…Johan sure has a way with words. Are the seniors studying too hard or what?

“Ok. Plus, you already have someone.”

(Hey, why would Hill say that? What if the freshman tells others? I don’t have a girlfriend, what if the freshman’s friends get interested…) And then Phii Hill hung up, before turning to give me a spooky smile.

“I know you were trying to make me jealous.” Phii Hill said in a softened tone, “And I really got jealous. Even just a little, I can’t let it go.”

“…Harsh.” I accidentally said. He really does seem jealously harsh. Imagine if that person wasn’t his friend, what would he do?    “With a naughty kid, I’ve got to be a bit harsh.”    “What’s naughty about me…” I frowned.

“You complimented someone else while I’m right here. It’s cruel to look at someone else’s picture when I’m around.”

“Selfish.” I muttered to myself. There’s always a crowd of girls around him; one after another.

“I admit it.” He smiled, “Everything’s mine, after all.”    Oh, come on, doesn’t he feel any shame saying that?

   I wanted to retort, but the food arrived first, so I let it go. Better not to argue further.

   He ordered a lot of dishes, and each one was as delicious as its price suggested. Not long after, once the main courses were nearly finished, the staff brought out desserts, including my cocoa.

   I was so focused on the food I didn’t say much, and he didn’t try to start a conversation either.

   Ding!

My phone chimed. I picked it up and saw it was North texting me. I glanced at Phii Hill, wary of him grabbing my phone again, but he just looked up at me without saying anything.

Not angry, huh?

   So I unlocked my screen to reply to North’s message.

   North Natchanan: Where are you? What time are you coming back to the room?

   Easter Panupong: Out for dinner, I’ll be back soon.

   North Natchanan: Oh, dining with the doctor, huh? Cute.

   Easter Panupong: Cute my foot.

   North Natchanan: You smell of love, really. Once you get a boyfriend, you forget about friends.

   Easter Panupong: Boyfriend? Did you ask me first?

   North Natchanan: So, you went with Phii Hill for real?

   Easter Panupong: Yeah, sort of, got dragged along.

   North Natchanan: Oh well, I won’t interrupt you then, hehe.

   Easter Panupong: You tease me a lot, you’ll get your own dose someday.

   North Natchanan: Never, bye.

   That roommate of mine really gets on my nerves, always teasing. I wonder what he’s been taking. I put my phone away after finishing the chat. When I looked up, Phii Hill was waiting for me.

“Let’s go then.” Phii Hill said with a gentle smile after we finished eating, contrasting with the spooky smile from earlier when Johan was mentioned. Once the bill at the counter was settled, we headed back to the car.

It was time to go back. I sat quietly in the passenger seat as usual. I’ve started getting used to talking with Phii Hill, but still, there’s no way I’d soften up.

Phii Hill seemed like he wanted to say something several times but decided not to. It took nearly twenty minutes of driving through traffic lights to reach my dormitory. When we arrived at the front of the dorm, I immediately got out of the car, not forgetting to turn and thank Phii Hill for taking me to a beautiful place and for the meal.

“Thank you.” I said quietly while closing the car door.    “…Ter.” Phii Hill spoke hesitantly.

“…?” I looked at him with a puzzled expression, waiting for him to continue.

“Nothing, just remember to come to work at the club tomorrow.” Phii Hill changed to a broad smile instead. I closed the car door when I saw he had finished speaking, without replying.

I ran up the stairs without looking back at the car owner before opening the door to my room.

Why do I get so easily swayed…I tried to get thoughts of him out of my head.

Today I took a lot of photos; I hope some of them turned out okay, I thought.

“Hey, how was the date?” North’s teasing voice came out of nowhere.

“What date, we didn’t go on a date.” I replied in an annoyed tone before tossing my bag onto the bed.

“Sure, sure, so how was he? Was he okay?”

“He was fine, I guess, for others.”

“Really? That’s too bad for the other girls, huh. They’d definitely cry if they knew he was flirting with you.”

“Yeah, don’t rub it in. Why would he flirt with me anyway? There are plenty of beautiful girls.”

“Maybe he likes something unusual.”

“You think I’m unusual?”

“Nah, it’s just that he doesn’t go for the good-looking ones who like him, and he goes for you instead. I’m still shocked.”

“Do you think he’s just teasing me?”

“That’s a bit extreme, why would he do that? Like, make you fall for him and then dump you? That’d be pretty harsh.”

“It could happen.” …Like what he’s done before, maybe.

“It’s too much. Just reject him outright.”

“I did reject him outright! It didn’t change anything! I’m going to shower, I’m hot.” I said, sounding weary. It seems like there’s a lot more to think about. Better to shower to relax a bit.

I couldn’t help but laugh when I remembered how jealous he got…

Such a person…brutal.

::

Hill, Ratchakit – added a new photo – 1 minute ago

   #OwnerOfMyWatch

   

   EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 5: Tunnel of Candle Light

   I was scrolling through my own Facebook, and it seems the latest photo I posted has become quite the talk. The hashtag #WhoIsTheWatchOwner, is gaining traction, and it looks like everyone’s curious about who it could be. People are guessing all sorts of names, some I recognize, others I’ve never heard of.    No one probably knows who the watch owner is. Even the owner themselves might not be aware yet. I’m curious about how they’ll react, if they’ll be angry or embarrassed.

   I imagined the face of that small figure getting angry and blushing, and I couldn’t help but smile to myself. Damn…I’m really in deep.

   I did this intentionally because I decided that approaching him directly might be the most effective way, making it clear right from the start. Even if he doesn’t believe it, if I try hard enough, there might be a chance. If I took it slow, he might just push me further away.

   Simply put, it’s like we’re going for the catch right away. If we take it slow, the prey might realize and escape, but no matter which method, there’s always a risk.

By now, he probably hates me. But whether he really hates me or not, I’m not sure.    But being hated is better than being ignored, because being ignored means there’s no feeling at all.

   I don’t want to take it slow like before; in our case, it’s not that simple. I want to be clear and consistent from the beginning.

   Got to take the risk…

   I’ve told everyone that I’m serious about someone now. At first, it was just playful talk with friends, but word spread fast. It feels like Bua said something about how that team of theirs was starting to get chaotic. I didn’t mean to cause such a stir, but I guess you can’t control these things.

   I worry about him. Maybe I’m overthinking, but if I suddenly declare I’m going to pursue someone, I fear he might get treated badly, even if it’s just minor things like being looked at with disdain or spoken about negatively. I don’t want even the slightest negative thing to happen to him.

   Is it going to be too hard? To approach him directly without others knowing.

   Hmm…should be doable.

   The next day…

   I’ve been working at the club as usual. Recently, the preparations are almost done. The only thing not quite right is the performance; this year’s drama club is short of people. According to the plan given by the teacher, there should be an opening dance performance, followed by the host speaking, then various performances which the drama club and selected departments are responsible for.

After that, around 6 PM, the concert by the singer invited by the university is scheduled to start.

When it comes to the club event, I guessed Ter wouldn’t show up today either. Since the day I posted the last photo, he hasn’t been coming to work at the club, probably trying to avoid me. He might be confused and overthinking things. I know where his dorm is, but suddenly going to find him might seem too pushy.

“Hill, Nong Ter hasn’t shown up for several days now. After we went to eat Japanese food together, is something wrong?” Bua asked me.

“I don’t think it’s anything serious.”

“But I’ve tried calling him several times and he doesn’t pick up. Maybe it’s because of the Japanese food we ate together, he might be allergic.”

“No, he’s not allergic to Japanese food.”

“How do you know?”

“He ate so much, which means he knows he’s fine.” And he was really cute while eating, stuffing his cheeks like a squirrel. I almost wanted to feed him myself.    “Uh, is that so?” Bua said, still looking worried. She always worries too much, but I also felt a bit off not seeing Nong Ter for several days.    Rrrrrrr

“Oh, Nong Ter is calling right now.” Bua picked up her phone. I told Bua to put it on speaker so I could listen too.

“Hello Nong Ter, I’ve called you so many times, why didn’t you answer? Are you okay? I was really worried, thinking something might have happened to you. You’ve been gone for days.” Bua spoke rapidly, probably leaving the person on the other end a bit stunned.

(Er…sorry, uh…I’m not feeling too well.) The voice on the phone said, sounding like he wasn’t very good at lying.

“Really? Is it because of an allergy to the food? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have taken you to that restaurant.”

(No, it’s not that…just a common cold.)

   “Oh, I see, but you’ve been gone for days, how long have you been sick?”    (Uh…about…a couple of days, I guess.) His voice stuttered a bit, probably not expecting such a detailed interrogation, but Bua didn’t seem to notice, or maybe I was just too observant about him.

“That’s bad, have you seen a doctor yet?”

(Not yet.)

   “Shouldn’t you go see a doctor then? It’s been two or three days and you’re not getting better. This is concerning. Do you want Hill to take you?”

(No!! …Uh, sorry. It’s okay, thank you.)

   “Don’t hesitate, and do you have a friend to keep you company?”

(No, my roommate is out.)

   “The kid is all alone, what should we do, Hill?” Bua turned to ask me.

(…) The other end of the line didn’t say anything further.

“Then let me come pick you up and take you to the hospital.” I said into the phone.

(No, no, I’m about to go out.) He replied immediately, his voice starting to sound flustered, making it quite obvious.

“Oh, really? But a sick person should rest.” I thought he was actually going out and had called Bua to inform her because he felt guilty for being absent for several days. Suddenly, I realized something, so I quickly headed to my car.

“Wait…where are you going?” Bua asked.

“To pick up the sick one, can I borrow your phone for a moment?” I said that before muting the phone briefly to start the car, intentionally not letting the person on the other end hear, though I could hear Bua muttering behind me but not stopping me; she probably thought I was going to take him to the hospital.

(No, I have an errand, I’ll hang up.)

   “Are you faking being sick?” I said this not to scold but to buy time. Why buy time? Well, if he’s still talking to me, he’s probably not left his room yet. From here to his dorm isn’t far. Just a short drive from the university.

   (N…I’m not faking. I’ll hang up.)

   “If you don’t come to work, your hours will be docked, you know that, right?” I added a small threat, but docking hours for scholarship students was true. Even if it starts from the beginning of the semester.

(…Huh? Will I get docked too?)

   “Yes, I’ll deduct the hours you didn’t work. If I really do that, you could lose your scholarship.” I pretend to say, actually, it’s not enough to lose the scholarship yet.

(…No.)

   “So, are you really sick or not?”

(…Really sick.)

   “Alright, then I’m coming to pick you up.” Even though I said that, I was already almost at his dorm.

(No!)

   “Why, though?”

   (…) He didn’t answer, probably not daring to say anything bad because I was acting like we had just met, and I thought he might not want to pretend we knew each other before either. If that’s the case, let’s keep it smooth for now.

“Then I’ll come pick you up.”

(No need!) And then he hung up. He must not have wanted to continue the conversation. But I had already arrived at the front of the dorm. I guessed it wouldn’t be long before someone with a surprised face came running down.

My guess was right. Someone hurried down the stairs, wearing a black and white t-shirt, dark jeans, and sneakers, and he had a camera with him, indicating he was probably going out to take photos.

Ter saw me and looked utterly shocked, then he started to fidget. I smiled at him.

“How are you doing, sick guy?”

“…Phii?” He avoided my gaze again, his face starting to turn red. I approached, and he seemed even more shocked, quickly stepping back. Why does he look so cute and adorable like this!

“You don’t look sick at all, that’s great.”

“…” The other party slightly scrunched up his nose in annoyance. It seemed like I had fully caught him in his lie.

“Where were you planning to go to take photos?”    “…” He still didn’t answer.

“Then get in the car.” I walked over and grabbed his small wrist to follow me, but he immediately shook off my hand.

“No. Not going!”

“Don’t be stubborn.” I accidentally used a phrase I often used with him before, and it seemed like he didn’t like it much.

“Not going!” The small guy was still stubborn, but his face and ears were clearly flushed red.

“Okay then, I’ll tell Bua that actually you’re not sick, but you lied about being sick to skip work.” I threatened while pulling out my phone, pretending to dial Bua’s number. Of course, no one would answer because Bua’s phone was in my car.

“…Don’t, please don’t tell her.” The person in front of me started speaking in a softer tone before furrowing his brows and looking up at me. Not long after, he averted his gaze again.

“Then get in the car.” I walked over to open the passenger door for him, and he slowly followed.    “You’re cheating.”

“Only with stubborn people.” I smiled while gently closing the car door, then went to the driver’s side and started the car immediately.

And in the car, there was no sound other than the air conditioning and the soft music from the radio. Actually, I was a bit nervous too, meeting someone I didn’t expect to see. And when we last parted, it was at its worst. But he seemed more nervous than me, trying to keep it in, constantly looking out the window, his body tense. I drove along, occasionally sneaking glances at him.

“Where are we going?” he asked after a long silence.

“To a photo spot, the view is really beautiful.” I knew of a place perfect for taking photos, somewhere he probably hadn’t been. I was sure he’d like it.

…

   A few days ago

   Back then, my heart started to feel different from usual.

   It was siding with itself, even though my brain was strictly forbidding it. I scanned through the same status an unknown person had posted repeatedly, to reassure myself I wasn’t misreading.

   That was my watch and my plate. Was he implying someone else…?

   If he meant someone else, why do this?

   And if he meant me, then I’d ask why he did it too…

   Even if my heart was still stubborn, the lesson was to keep it at bay…No matter what he does, I shouldn’t care, right?

   Yes…there’s no room for him in my heart anymore…That’s what I thought.

   Just a photo!. Am I already this weak, Ter? Stay strong!

   “Ter…are you okay?” North’s familiar voice snapped me out of my reverie.

“I’m okay, why do I not look okay?” I kept my face neutral.

“Nah, you just zoned out suddenly. What’s with this picture?” North asked, pointing at the photo displayed on my computer screen.

“Nothing, I was just shocked.”

“Hill Rachakitti, oh, is that Hill, the doctor? Do you know him?”

“Huh, do you know him too?”

“He’s quite famous, you know.”

“Really?” I was thinking whether to tell North or not…better tell him. At least, there’s someone to talk to, to consult with, “Did you see the caption? What do you think about it?”

“Flirting, I guess.” He paused for a moment, “Probably with the one sitting opposite.”    “Me.”

“Huh?”

“I was the one sitting opposite.” I sighed, “Remember when I told you that senior took me out for a treat?”

“!!!!” North looked shocked and stared at me in disbelief, then turned to look at the screen again, “Yeah. Looking closely, it’s your watch.” He lifted my left wrist where I was wearing that watch.

“See? You’re still shocked.”

“Shit, yeah, I’m shocked. And it’s with another guy, no less.” He furrowed his brow, “I’m not saying it’s about gender, but I thought that senior already had a girlfriend. I’ve seen a lot of news about it.”    “Yeah, I’ve heard that too.”

“Did you guys know each other before?”

“We went to the same school.” Not exactly a lie, but I wasn’t ready to tell the whole story yet.

“And have you talked to each other?”

“A little.”

“Did he show any signs of liking or being interested in you?”

“No.” Nothing unusual happened when we met at university, it was just me being paranoid about everything.

“But with a caption like this? What do you think?”

“Me? I don’t think anything.” I said.

“Oh, man, the girls at uni must be crying over this. Aren’t you going to try talking to him?”

“Nah, I’m not interested.”

“Are you going to reject him?”

“I might not even know what to think. He might just be joking.” I said what I thought, and I hate this kind of joke the most.

“That’s tough, if it were me, I’d be super uncomfortable, especially since he’s a senior at the club, right?”    “Yeah, it’s hard for me too.”

“Come on. It’s better if you just ignore it. If there’s something, just reject it outright.”

“Umm.”

I was still caught up thinking about that, my confidence that I thought would remain unshaken was starting to wane. Sigh…can’t it be like this? After that, I didn’t go to the club for several days, intentionally avoiding it, making it clear that I wasn’t okay. Phii  Bua called multiple times, but I didn’t answer any of them. She must be worried.

I should call in sick to makePhii Bua stop worrying. So today, I’ll go out for a walk and take some photos, since North isn’t in the room.

Yes…

It’s clear that I’m not okay…

So why did I get dragged into this car?! For heaven’s sake. What am I doing in this car with this person, the one I’ve been trying to avoid? This guy is really bad.

Who said doctors are handsome and kind-hearted? Take those words back!

He threatened me!!

I said I was sick and was about to rush out of the dorm, but there he was, leaning against his car looking all cool. And I, unfortunately, had my camera slung over my shoulder as evidence.

Is this Easter or what, am I a hamster caught in a trap?

Phii Hill was driving with such ease, even though the AC was on full blast, I felt like I was in a heater, all hot. Outside, the sky had been overcast since morning. You didn’t need a weather forecast to guess it would rain. It would have been nice to go take photos around the foothills.

But here I am! And I don’t even know where we’re going!

The luxury car turned into a small alley, and soon we entered a temple area.

Huh? Did he bring me to a temple?

The car stopped in a small parking lot, the sign in front indeed said it was a temple, but inside, it didn’t look like one at all. It was very spacious, surrounded by forest.

“Have you been here before?” asked the deep voice next to me, as if he really wanted an answer from me. Do you have to stare so intently?

“No…I haven’t.” I answered quietly.

“Then let me be your guide.” said Phii Hill before getting out of the car. I undid my seatbelt, and before I realized it, he had already opened the car door for me. Oh my, such a gentleman!

I didn’t say anything, just held my camera tightly in both hands, sweaty. I walked slowly behind the taller figure. Phii Hill seemed a bit taller than last year, maybe around 180-182 cm. He was already in good shape before, but since going to university, he’s got a bit more muscular, not too much to be scary, just enough to make the girls scream. That handsome face still had that gentle smile, and his way of speaking hadn’t changed; he was still polite and soft-spoken.

Just wearing ordinary clothes, a shirt, and jeans, he still looked better than most folks. Perfection like that, who wouldn’t like it? Let others like him all they want, but I’ll pass!

Suddenly, the tall figure turned and smiled at me. I automatically looked away, oh boy. Shouldn’t have stared for so long, I guess. I heard Phii Hill chuckle quietly.    Normally, I wouldn’t dare to look, but since I was looking from behind, to be honest, we’ve never really made eye contact since we met. I’m just not brave enough…

“This is an old temple.” Phii Hill said in a pleasant voice, almost like a tour guide. “Before, this whole area was just forest, so the temple is quite spacious. It’s also very close to nature. The architecture is in the Lanna style, with most of the walls made from bricks, hardly any modern additions, preserving the Lanna identity. I find it quite enchanting.”

I listened intently, then turned to take pictures of the flowers by the path. The atmosphere was quite nice, especially with no harsh sunlight today. The other party waited patiently for me to finish without complaining, even sneaking a little smile.

“You take beautiful photos.” a voice from behind startled me; Phii Hill had snuck up to look at the photos I took from behind without me noticing.

“Hey…don’t look!” I said, moving away. Oh no…what if my heart gives out now?

Sigh, I hope my face isn’t turning red again.

“Be the photographer for me for a bit.” He said with that sweet, gentle smile. I’m so weak because of that. Not just me; in the past, the girls in my class would scream at that smile. It really does tug at the heartstrings, so I try to avoid looking directly at it.

“No, it’ll waste memory.” I said, not entirely serious. He chuckled softly.

“You know, I rarely let people take my picture.”

“I’ve seen plenty.” I said, thinking of all the social media posts, people asking for photos with him; how could he not have many photos?

“You saw my pictures too? That makes me happy.” He said with a broad smile.

“People share them.” I tried to keep my voice normal to hide how nervous I was deep down.

“Yes, at least you’ve seen them, right?”

“…I guess.” I answered quietly, avoiding the question, noticing a small path leading into the forest. It looked mysterious. He probably noticed my gaze and explained.

“This path leads to the monks’ quarters, see? There’s an old man cleaning over there.”

Oh, that’s right, indeed.

“Let’s go.”

I started to see something in front of me. Excitingly, there were old steps made of small bricks with two giant statues by the side, and a shop selling souvenirs and offerings next to it.

I carefully walked up the steps, not forgetting to take photos, with Phii Hill leading the way. I tried not to pay attention, but I could see from the corner of my eye that he was still watching me without letting me out of his sight. Sigh, what’s with him! Anyone would get tense under such a gaze!

When we reached the upper level, on the right, there were religious art exhibitions, on the left, a viewpoint, and in front, a wall with tunnel openings. I saw a few tourists, but not many. A lot of them were heading into the tunnel; it must be the highlight here.

But I hadn’t seen any Buddha statues to pay respects to yet.

“The actual temple is inside.”

“Huh?”

“Want to go inside and have a look?” Phii Hill asked. I wouldn’t refuse, I’ve never seen anything like this before. I walked in, took off my shoes, and placed them where they should go. Phii Hill told me to go in first.

Inside, it was almost pitch dark except for the soft glow of yellow candles placed at intervals. The murals on the walls and ceiling left me in awe of their beauty. Just looking, you could tell how much care was put into them. Even though time had faded them, the scent of fragrant candles and fresh flowers filled the air. I couldn’t help but think how romantic the atmosphere was, like stepping back into the ancient Lanna world.

“Ter, look to the left.” He said, and I turned to see a small path leading to a Buddha statue. We both put our hands together in prayer. Then, as we walked further, we encountered more statues and some parts of the tunnel walls were natural rock faces. I was so thrilled by this new experience that I momentarily forgot who I was with. Just earlier, I nearly tripped over a step, but Phii Hill caught my arm just in time. Not sure if it was just my imagination, but he seemed to be looking out for me the whole time.    He’s always this kind, not just to me.

We walked until we reached the end of the tunnel, exiting at the back of the viewpoint. I wanted to go see the view, but we didn’t have our shoes, so we had to walk back the same way.

Tap!

Tap!

It started raining!

Damn…the rain just had to start pouring down now, and we didn’t bring an umbrella. This forced me, the other person, and other tourists to take shelter near the entrance of the tunnel to wait out the rain, but it didn’t look like it would stop anytime soon. The raindrops came down relentlessly, turning the view into a curtain of rain where you could hardly see through, and the wind picked up, sending sprays of rain our way.

Thump

Something covered me. I turned to look at the person beside me.

A shirt?

Phii Hill had taken off his outer shirt and given it to me, leaving him in just his inner t-shirt. He turned and gave me a gentle smile.

He’s…too kind.

I ducked my head to hide my face which was turning hot, certain my cheeks and ears were bright red. My heart started beating faster, almost as if it might leap out of my chest. Damn…what kind of doctor are you, trying to give someone a heart attack like this!

“Uh…thank you.” I murmured softly, probably too quiet to be heard over the sound of the rain.

“It’s nothing.” He replied. Oh, he heard me? Phii Hill’s smile was still as gentle as ever. I felt an inexplicable warmth, with the curtain of rain in front of us and the candlelit tunnel behind.

“Can I ask for something?”

“No.” I said without looking at the tall figure.    “Please?” The doctor’s voice was coaxing.

“Uh, what is it?”

“Can I hold your hand?”

“…”

Shit…my heart! Don’t you dare jump out!

I slowly extended my hand towards him, feeling the warmth as he gently took it.

Honestly, I was too embarrassed to look at him.

Thump!

Thump!

Damn, my legs were starting to feel unsteady now!!

“Can I ask for something else?”

“No!” I answered immediately. What more could there be? Are you trying to get an inch when you’ve already got a foot? I’m already breathless from this!

“This is the last thing I’ll ask.”

“What now?”

“Can I ‘court’ you, Ter…please?”

“No!!!!”

 

EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 4: Always

   Under the medical faculty building, almost all the students had already left. My friends and I were sitting at a wooden table in the faculty courtyard. We had planned to work on a group project; actually, the term hadn’t even started yet, but the professor had called all the medical students to attend classes before the term officially began. Why? Because there’s just too much content to squeeze into one school term.

I’m ‘Hill’, a second-year medical student, and the faculty moon, which seems like a prestigious position to many, but for me, it’s just okay. I was selected for photoshoots and interviews, and I still don’t know how I ended up with this position.

This has made my life more complicated. Since my first year, seniors of all genders have been trying to get close, buying me things, constantly approaching me. I don’t mind being liked, but sometimes it gets uncomfortable. I’m not particularly interested in anyone. Not even interested in love at all. I don’t know, it’s hard to explain, but it feels like there’s always something unresolved weighing on me.

Due to my father’s job, my whole family had to move here abruptly. It was very sudden; one morning my mom said we were moving, and by evening, we were out of the house. Luckily, we had a house already bought, which made things a bit easier, but I moved into a condo by myself for easier commuting to school.    Honestly, I didn’t want to come here at all. I really didn’t. It felt like I was leaving someone behind without a chance to explain or tell the truth. I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye, as if all those years of effort were for nothing. I should have had the courage to tell him a long time ago.

Time passed…

I’m now far away, in a different part of the country, unable to meet or contact him. It makes me sad, but there’s still this faint hope that someday we might cross paths somewhere in this world.

And then, will my feelings still be the same…

And what would he think? I don’t know either…But I’m sure by now he must hate me.

I once went through our old chat messages; it made me wish I could turn back time if I could, but I had to face reality: his Facebook account was closed. He changed his phone number too, making any chance of contact zero. Even if I tried to find him, he probably wouldn’t want to see me.

And no matter what…the smiles of others. They’ve never made me as happy as his smile did.

One day, while checking documents for my mother, who funds scholarships and donates a lot to this university under the name “Lady Ratana”, earning much respect, she asked me to help check the scholarship applications for this year to see if all documents were complete. I was going through them with a sense of boredom when I came across one file:

Panupong Podhithasin, Faculty of Veterinary Medicine, Year 1

This is…

I glanced over at the photo of the student in the top right corner of the paper.

Yes, indeed…

“Think of it this way, everything depends on ‘time and opportunity’.”    A voice echoed in my mind. I had used this phrase to comfort myself, like tricking myself into believing there was still hope, that my time and opportunity would come someday.

But maybe it really could happen…

The whole day, I kept thinking about this, pondering various scenarios. What should I do? Would we meet? How much would he have changed? If we actually met face to face, how would I act? Would he remember me at all? And so on, these thoughts just kept circling.

If he knew I was studying here too, I bet…someone like him would be up all night.

“Hill, hey, Hill.” The voice of the person next to me snapped me out of my reverie.    “What?”

“What are you daydreaming about? Help with the work.” said Johan, or Jo for short, one of my friends from the same faculty. He’s lively, playful, and gets along with everyone. He approached me first. Not sure how we ended up in the same group. Honestly, he’s quite the flirt, and being rich, he can casually date anyone. I’ve given up trying to remember his girlfriend’s name.

There are four of us in our group. Sitting next to me right now is Johan, as I’ve introduced. Across from me, busy working and ignoring everyone, is “Tonfah”, who others might see as quiet, cool, and good-looking, but he’s not really that quiet. Despite appearances, Tonfah is the faculty’s vice-president.

Next to Tonfah is “Arthit”, the crazy one who gives you a headache when you talk to him. He looks tough but is sincere. Though he can be quite blunt, unlike Johan who’s like a sly fox.

“Yeah, you’re just staring at your phone.” Arthit adds to what Johan said.    “You haven’t started yet, Arthit. You’re not doing anything either, Jo. You’re leaving Tonfah to do all the work alone.” I comment. I’m not really taking advantage, but I just want a brief break before diving into the work. I just had class, after all.

“You guys are the ones who are lazy, I’ll write my name on this and submit it to the professor.” Tonfah says without looking up from his paper. “Here, take this part, Hill. This is yours, Jo, Tit.” Tonfah handed out thick stacks of paper. His method of work distribution is just throwing it out there. Whoever does what, as long as there’s good work to submit.

“Lazy bunch, I swear if we weren’t studying medicine.” Arthit grumbled but took the work anyway.

“Yeah, might as well flunk out.” Johan chimed in.

“Ha, that dude with the milk, acting all dreamy. Last final exam, I nearly got an F.” Arthit pointed at me.

“Well, I’ve got to do my best, don’t I?” I said, rummaging through my backpack for a pen.

“You better do just enough. If this group fails, the whole faculty goes down. You got a 98, that’s an A, right? Tonfa got a 90, that’s a B. Shit, I got an 84, I felt like I was almost ‘taking the dog home’.”

‘Taking the dog home’ means getting a D grade, or Dog. If A equals Ant, B equals Bird, C equals Cat, when grades come out, they ask what’s the least desirable animal, that’d be an F, for Fish.

“Dad told me to ‘do good’ for the project, and said the house was full of howling dogs last night.” Arthit laughed, “Instead of competing for grades, why don’t we collaborate to get even scores? We could all ‘raise ants’ together.”

“Are you studying entomology to raise bugs? Everyone wants good grades.” Johan said before turning back to his phone.

“Oh, Jo, you traitor. I thought we were in this together. In the end, you changed colors.” Arthit said with a disappointed tone.

Then we didn’t speak for nearly twenty minutes because each of us was absorbed in what we were doing with our hands. Once my mind started racing, I didn’t want to stop; I wanted to finish the work. Until Tonfa broke the silence:    “Phew, finally done with topic 1.1.”

“I finished 1.3 too.” I said, putting down my pen and stretching my neck a couple of times to relieve the stiffness.

“I’m almost done, just a bit more,” said Arthit. I glanced over at Johan, who was scribbling away with intense focus.

“Done, done!” Johan and Arthit said simultaneously.

“Are you guys competing or what?” asked Tonfa.

“Nah, but finishing first feels good.” Jo said before taking a sip of his coffee. “Hey, Hill, I’ve been meaning to ask, what was up with that last photo you posted?” Arthit asked, recalling something.

“Yeah, what’s with the ‘pay for new treats, pay whatever’? Are you playing the rich kid game now?” Johan chimed in teasingly, “It’s all over Twitter with this hashtag. Who’s the watch owner?” He held up his phone to show me.

“New hashtag? I haven’t seen it.” I took his phone to look, realizing I hadn’t checked my Twitter since posting that photo yesterday. The watch on that junior’s wrist had sparked this hashtag.

“Who is it? I really want to know. You don’t date the faculty stars, you don’t care about Dao. Saw Baifern waiting for you that day, I felt so sorry for her, I really wanted to comfort her.” Johan said, twisting around in a way that was quite eerie.

“I just don’t want to say anything yet.” I said, handing my phone back to Johan.

“Keeping secrets from friends.” Tonfa remarked.

“Alright, I’ll introduce you guys later.”

“Are you courting someone?”

“No idea.”

“Cheh, someone like Hill trying to court someone, I thought you were hopeless. But at your level, you’d need to court? I think just telling her you like her would make her swoon.”

“Nah, this one’s tough.”

“Really? So, how tough on a scale of one to ten?”

“Maybe a ten.” I thought for a moment before answering Johan. Hmm…he really is that tough for me.

   “Then she’s not just any star who’s come following you up to this point, oh, your little star, can I have Baifern then?” Johan said with a cheeky grin.

“Up to you, just be careful not to mix up your tracks.” I said nonchalantly. Johan never takes anyone seriously, always teasing this one or that one. He has so many girls in his circle, I wonder if he remembers them all.

“Watch out, Jo, if you meet someone you’re serious about, it’ll be trouble.” Tonfa warned, true to his role as the group’s wise one.

“Ugh, that’s tough to say, I don’t think I’ll find that in this lifetime, better to stay like this forever.”

“Who’ll take care of you when you’re old?”

“I’m rich.”

“Okay, that’s settled.” Tonfa sighed, rolling his eyes. That’s right, Johan really is rich; his family has big businesses. He’s also started his own ventures and is already continuing the family business. He doesn’t want to be seen as living off his parents’ wealth, so he’s been doing things on his own since high school. If you have money, finding someone to take care of you isn’t hard, but whether you’ll find true love is another question.

“So, in conclusion, our Hill is starting to be paired up. That leaves only us floating aimlessly, right?” Arthit said, sounding annoyed.

“Paired up? I haven’t even done anything yet.” I said. “And Tonfa, you aren’t exactly a saint either, I’m starting to smell love coming from you.”    “Really? Tonfa too? Who is it?”

“Crazy Hill, just talking nonsense.” Tonfa said, uninterested.

“I know, alright. You can hide anyone, but just don’t hide me.” Tonfa usually doesn’t talk about himself much. If he had someone he loved, he probably wouldn’t tell anyone, but I’ve started noticing it recently. I’m not sure, but it’s these little signs that make me suspect something.

“Ha, nonsense. Why don’t you try looking at Arthit, he might be the one hiding something.”

“Hold on, what am I hiding?”

“Arthit…he’s totally dead inside.” said Johan, “Too rough. Doesn’t know how to be gentle with women.”

“Alright, just leave me be.”

“Well then, Hill, if there’s anything you need to discuss, let me know. I’ve got to go, I have an appointment.” Johan said before getting up from his chair, “Tun, keep the work for me.”

“Who are you meeting, your girlfriend?”

“No, it’s my babe.”

“Who?” Johan didn’t reply, just smiled and waved dismissively.

“Forget it, Tun. Don’t bother trying to remember his girlfriend’s name.” I said resignedly.

After that, we all went our separate ways once the work was done satisfactorily. Tonfa, being the team leader, took care of the paperwork. Even though I do well in school, I don’t like to complicate things for myself. Being the president of the club is the same. Initially, I didn’t want to be one at all, but my mother insisted, so I just went along with it. Once you take on a role, you have to do it to the best of your ability.

I pressed the remote to unlock my favorite car, but this car my dad allowed me to use tends to attract too much attention. I don’t really like driving around and being stared at. I wanted to ask for another car from home, but they’re all just as conspicuous, if not more so.

Upon arriving at my condo, I parked in my reserved spot. Since reserving a parking space under the condo, life has become much easier; no need to circle around looking for a spot. I just drive in and park. The rental fee is manageable too.

Once I got to my room, I tossed my backpack onto the large sofa, loosened my tie to relieve some discomfort. My mom found this condo for me; it’s spacious with all the necessary amenities. There’s a large living room, a bedroom big enough for three people to sleep comfortably, and a small kitchen corner with all the cooking equipment ready.

I opened my computer, logged into my Facebook account.

There’s this one account I recently came across. It’s fairly new, so there aren’t many posts or pictures, and considering the owner’s personal habits, they don’t seem like the type to post on Facebook daily. I scrolled through, looking at older posts. Some of the statuses made me wonder if they were about me.    Easter Panupong – May 12: Yay, I passed the exam. I’m going to the northern region now.

   I’ve been scrolling back through my posts since I created this account.

Easter Panupong – May 28: I’m going to be far away. I feel strangely sad.

   Easter Panupong – June 5: Added 1 new photo in Rayong Province.    It was a landscape photo of a place with a caption – Good memories before we don’t see each other again.

   I remember this place; it was the first spot we visited together. At that time, I just wanted to take him somewhere. I remember it was quite far and the journey was tough, but when we arrived, it was worth it because of the smiles on our faces. I was so caught up in his charm that I forgot about the near two-hour drive.

Easter Panupong – July 18: Added 1 new photo.

   A picture of the night sky, but with beautiful twinkling stars, captioned – Same sky, this was the last post. After that, it was just check-ins for meals and some minor complaints.

   If he posts something that refers to me, it means he still remembers…

   Even if his feelings might have changed…

   Before this, I wasn’t sure at all. I wasn’t even trying to wait, but it seemed like I

couldn’t move on, even without hope. After not seeing or contacting each other for a full year, the longing that once was intense began to fade until I could let go.

   Sometimes I thought I had forgotten…

   But I couldn’t open my heart to someone else.

   These two things contradict each other. I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried to imagine what if we met by chance again. I thought I could act indifferent and wouldn’t feel anything anymore.

   But that’s not true at all…

   Just a glimpse of his face, all the time I spent thinking, trying everything to stop missing him, trying to fill the void in my heart, all of it crumbled so easily.

   I understood immediately at that moment…

   My heart has always needed only him…

   And it will be like this forever…

   

   EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter 3: Infront Of Me

   “A cup of cocoa, please.” I reached into my wallet, pulling out a twenty-baht note and a five-baht coin. After running a marathon for about ten minutes, I was exhausted.

The question is, why did I run?

   So, the story goes, a first-year with big, innocent eyes had his first club activity experience end with him suddenly running out in the middle of it. How will everyone look at me now?

   No excuse would work in this case. Saying I had an urgent matter to attend to? That wouldn’t cut it, especially not when I was running like that. Or maybe I was scared of the president? Did he look like he was going to eat me? That’s just silly.

Or maybe I just felt like exercising all of a sudden? That’s even worse.    “Thank you.”

“Thanks.” I took the cocoa cup and drank from it as I walked back to the dorm.

It’s way too hot and sunny out here for running. I felt that working with the club

this time might not work out, for a few reasons: one, having Phii Hill as the president, which is just bad luck; two, he saw me, fully, and now I’m not sure what will happen next. Will he pretend not to know me? Or will he act indifferent? Or worse, will he approach me? That would be annoying!!

Approach me? That’s laughable, what am I even thinking? There’s no reason for him to do that. Plus, he’s got, uh, some sort of shipping thing going on with his potential girlfriend waiting for him after class.

The third reason is what just happened, running out like I was in the Olympics, it’s embarrassing now that I think about it. I should have thought before running, at least stopped when the team head called after me.

“Hey, you’re back, how was the club event? Fun?” North, who was playing games, greeted me as I opened the door.

“Not at all, I want out.”

“Why? Was it that hard?”

“Not really, but I just don’t like it.” I sighed, placing the cocoa on the table next to North before jumping onto the bed.

“What can you do? You’re the one who wanted the scholarship. If you don’t do it, you’ll lose it.” He said, taking a sip of my cocoa.

“There’s someone there I don’t like, the one I told you about.” I remembered consulting North about this once, and he told me to ask him again if needed.

“Really? Damn, that’s bad luck. And then what happened?”

“I just ran into him directly, got scared, and ran away.”

“Seriously? You ran out right after seeing him?”

“Yeah, I ran out.”

“Huh?” North turned around with a surprised look.

“Yeah.” I nodded.

“Did you run right away? As soon as you saw him, you ran?” I nodded again, to make sure he understood correctly. “Everyone must have been confused then. No wonder you didn’t want to go. If it were me, I’d think you were crazy.”

“I didn’t mean to, my legs just moved on their own, that’s why I’m stressed out here. And I’ve got to go back tomorrow.”

“Why go to such lengths? Do you hate him that much?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“That’s strange.”

“How is it strange?”

“Usually, when we see someone we hate, we don’t run. It’s not like they’re a cockroach or a spider or something.” North turned away from his game screen, swiveling his chair to face me.

“I don’t know, I just know I can’t stand there looking at him or letting him see me.” I said, expressing my true feelings.

“Hmm…Why do you think you can’t look at him?”

“Because I hate him.”

“At that moment, did you feel disgusted by him?”

“Uh…not exactly.” I wasn’t sure what feeling I felt, but I didn’t think it was disgust.

“So, if I told you to stand and stare at him for ten minutes, could you do it?”

“No way, absolutely not.”

“Why?”

“Why would I stare at someone I don’t like?”

“Then, if he were to stare at you instead, how would you feel?”

Oh come on, North. What are you, an engineering student or a psychologist?

   “I…would probably feel uncomfortable.” I answered honestly.

“Are you sure you hate him? It seems more like you like him.”

“North, seriously!! Is that your mouth or your foot talking?” I scolded him. Crazy! Like? what? Come on, let’s stop talking about this!! “What do you mean by like? Let’s drop this topic.”

“Don’t get mad. I’m just saying what I think. You look more embarrassed than anything.”

“Enough, beast. If you say I like him again, I’ll take my cocoa back.”

“Hahaha, okay, so what are you going to do next?”

“That’s the thing. What should I do?”

“Maybe just stay cool, act like nothing happened. If anyone asks, just say it was nothing and avoid the topic. As for this person you hate, just pretend you don’t see him, let him be.”

“But what if I run into him face-to-face like yesterday again?”

“Then don’t run. Just slip away or take another route, act like you weren’t interested from the start.”

“You make it sound easy. When I ran, I didn’t think at first.”

“Then it means you were flustered.”

“I wasn’t flustered!! Alright, I’ll try to act like nothing’s wrong, that should work, right?”

“Right, let me know how it goes, I’m curious.”

“Yeah, for this matter, I can only talk to you about it.” If I consulted Foam or Typhoon, they’d definitely grill me until there’s nothing left.    The next day, 09:12 AM

   “Good morning, Easter.” Thaam greeted me as usual. I had just arrived at the club’s courtyard, and it seemed like no one noticed or cared about what happened yesterday. No one was giving me strange looks.    “What happened yesterday? I saw you run out.”

“Uh, oh, it was nothing really.” I said, following North’s advice. I wasn’t sure if it would work.

“Were you not feeling well? Or did you have a stomach ache?”

“Yeah, a little bit.”

“There’s actually a bathroom around there, you know.”

“Oh, really…I didn’t know.” Maybe I was overthinking it. Why would anyone care that much about my actions? Here’s Thaam just thinking I had a stomach ache. Then I changed the topic, asking if there was any more work from yesterday, and Thaam explained that since it was the first day, they didn’t want to overload us. We just finished repainting the old signs and then were let go, and he didn’t say anything else about it.

“Nong Ter.” a deep voice called out. I turned to see Phii Pim approaching, oh no, this could be trouble.

“Phii Pim, good morning.” Thaam and I greeted her with a wai, and she returned it.

“Sorry about this.” Phii Pim said with a forced smile, “About yesterday, did my friend do something wrong to you?”

“Huh? Oh? No, that’s not it.” I was confused. Even if that guy was the cause, he hadn’t actually done anything to me, really. I’m the one who should apologize for my rude behavior.

“Don’t feel bad, you see, Hill, uh, the president, he gets really angry when someone wakes him up from his nap. I didn’t know, so I sent you to wake him. I heard last time a freshman ran out crying like you did, apparently got scolded pretty badly.”

“Really? That bad?” Could someone really be scolded to the point of running out crying? Then my case isn’t that strange, right?

   “Yeah, but even if he says he didn’t scold you, we know he must have done something. Otherwise, why would you run out?” Phii Pim said, making me feel a bit guilty as if I was shifting the blame onto my senior.

“Ah, but it’s fine now.” I said. How did it end up like this? “I’m the one who should apologize, I was the one who was rude.”

“No worries, no worries, we’ve decided to treat you to dinner as an apology,

Nong Thaam, you should come too.”

“I’m sorry, I have some business today.” Thaam said, bowing his head in apology.

“Oh, that’s a pity, save it for next time, but Nong Ter, you have to come, I’ll make sure Hill treats you as his apology.”

Hey, Phii Pim, I understand you mean well, but maybe not doing anything would have been better.

“It’s alright, I actually have some business too.” I didn’t really have any business, but the idea of having dinner with that senior made me want to have some instantly!!

“Come on, we’ve already made plans. Bua is also coming, she even postponed her appointment to eat with us. Look, speaking of which, here she comes.” I turned in the direction Phii Pim pointed, seeing Phii Bua and another short-haired senior, probably named Dew, walking towards us, chatting and looking like they were having fun.

“Oh, Pim, Nong Ter, and Nong Thaam too.” Phii Bua smiled happily upon seeing us and pulled Phii Dew over.

“Hello.” Thaam and I greeted them, and the two seniors smiled back.

“I apologize, Hill might have been a bit grumpy, but he’s not a bad person.” Phii Bua said. Why does everyone feel the need to apologize to me? The seniors here really care about the freshmen’s feelings.

   “It’s okay, I’m not thinking anything of it.” I said.

“That’s good, we’ll be working together for several more years, we don’t want any bad feelings.” Dew smiled. “Pim, did you tell Nong Ter about the dinner treat?”

“I did. But it seems like the freshman isn’t available.” Wait, why does Phii Pim seem like she’s trying to pressure me into agreeing?

   “Oh really? That’s too bad. We were planning to treat you as an apology. We’ve even rescheduled for it.” In front of me were three kind seniors smiling and looking at me, but why did it feel like there was a knife at my throat, forcing me to go? It was really a subtle form of pressure.

“Uh…sure.” I gave in, I surrendered. Please remove the knife from my throat.

“Yay, great!”

“What were the two girls gossiping about earlier? It seemed fun, I want to know too.” Phii Pim said.

“Do you really want to know? We were just gossiping because they were talking a lot, but do guys like to gossip about girls’ stuff too?”

“We also like to know what’s going on, right?” the team head chimed in, looking at me and Thaam. Actually, he’s right. I’m one of those who enjoys hearing about other people’s business too.

“Okay, so the story goes like this, a few days ago, right, on our university’s Cute Girl Cute Boy page, they posted a picture of Baifern waiting for Hill while he was in the lab. It made the HillBaifern team scream all over Twitter.” Phii Bua explained with enthusiasm.

“What’s the HillBaifern team?” Phii Pim asked, which was exactly what I wanted to know. Honestly, I’m not that interested in his affairs, but since someone was telling the story, I might as well listen to it clearly. I really don’t want to know, really!

“Hill is super handsome, super rich, the university moon, president of the society, everyone likes him, right? He’s out of reach for most people. But there are stars from three faculties chasing after him. They’re really stars, all beautiful, although there are stars from other faculties too, but they don’t follow Hill around like this.”    “Oh, I’ve heard something like that. Last time, I was doing the lab with him, and Baifern was waiting from four to six. She must have been really free with nothing to do. And Hill didn’t even bother to go out to see her, you could say he was completely indifferent. Then when the lab was over, Baifern invited him to dinner, and he just turned her down with a straight face.” Phii Pim recounted as an eyewitness. Why did my heart feel a bit lighter when she said Phii Hill was indifferent? I don’t know.

   “Wow, really? Our friend has some nerve, huh? That’s the management faculty star. Show some respect, she has spent so much on Botox, and he doesn’t even acknowledge her.”

“Dew, don’t be mean like that.” Although Phii Bua said that, she was also secretly laughing.

“Just kidding, keep telling the story.”

“So, then there were different teams forming, right? At first, there were many, but due to the dynamic created by the person himself and his fans, now there are mainly three teams: Team Baifern, Team Fondao, and Team Thanmild.”

“Thanmild, the star of our medical faculty, right?”

“Yes, she claims they’re just friends, but they’ve been pretty inseparable. And the buzz has been growing; maybe she likes him but doesn’t show it dramatically, just quietly staying close. Hmm, many people confirm they were from the same high school, have been close for a long time, maybe they’ve liked each other from the beginning.”

Huh? They liked each other from the start, back in school, Phii Thanmild and Phii Hill? That can’t be true…I was almost always with them or was there something I missed? Ugh, I hope that’s not the case. I don’t want to feel any more foolish than I already do.

   “And then there’s Fondao, the star of the nursing faculty, also making waves. So there are three teams now. The fan clubs argue among themselves, and the admin of the page really stirs the pot. And just the other day, the page posted a picture of Fern, right? The fans from that side went wild, but our Hill, he doesn’t seem to care at all. People can ship them, take pictures, and fantasize all they want; he knows about it but whenever I ask him, he just says ‘whatever’, like he doesn’t care what others do.”

“That’s true.” Phii Pim interjected, “There were even rumors that he’s emotionless, or gay, or already has a partner, but he just doesn’t care. However, his indifferent attitude is the problem; he neither likes nor clearly rejects anyone, which gives those people hope.”

“Right, I don’t get him either, but then, Hill, the doctor, actually commented on the page where Fern’s picture was posted, asking them to take the picture down. Now that was a surprise. Why ask for it to be removed? Does Hill not like Fern? Why suddenly care when he never did before? Because there’s someone else he’s serious about? Or is he one of the other two people interested, or maybe Fern herself is serious about something, but doesn’t want to reveal it yet, so she asked him to remove it? Everyone’s just speculating wildly.”    Oh, that picture, huh? Phii Hill asked for it to be removed?

   “Wow, that’s quite the drama, people really go that far?”

“We’re no different, Dew, gossiping like this. But it’s entertaining. Look, this tweet is pretty heated.” Phii Bua held up her phone showing Twitter account.

Indeed, on this platform, you can say just about anything.

“And the latest, Fern posted something too, check it out.” Baifern Nantacha: 1 day ago

   I’m still hopeful though :,)

   “Wow, that’s bold.” Phii Dew commented, “So, what now? Should we go and ask him?”

“Sorry, I already asked.” Phii Bua said cheerfully. “I mean, how could I miss out when he’s right here with us. Do you want to know what he said?”

“Yes, of course. Don’t keep us in suspense, tell us quickly.” Phii Dew shook Phii Bua’s arm.

“Alright, he said, ‘I’m serious about someone now.’ Isn’t that great? If I tweet this, everyone’s going to go crazy.”    He’s…serious about someone?

   “Hey, speak of the devil, here comes Hill, over here, let’s clear this up right now.” Phii Dew shouted, calling out to the person stepping out of a fancy car. I turned towards where Phii Dew was calling, and Phii Hill looked over, confused, before Phii Dew ran over to drag him here.

Thud!

Thump!

It was happening again, just like yesterday; my heart, legs, and hands were starting to shake. I looked down, not daring to lift my head. When footsteps stopped right in front of me, my heart felt like it was about to burst out of my chest, and I felt heat rush to my face and ears. Oh gosh!! Stay normal, Ter, look up! Or else he’ll wonder what’s wrong!

And then I slowly lifted my head, but I was startled to meet his sharp eyes already looking at me. His handsome face was looking down, with a slight smirk that probably melted many hearts, but it shouldn’t be doing that to me, right? Sigh. “So, Hill, Bua said you have a serious partner now. Is that true?” Phii Pim asked, and everyone turned to look at Phii Hill for an answer, but he was only looking at me. Why are you looking at me?!

“Yeah, I do.” Phii Hill answered, still not taking his eyes off me, his smile widening, with eyes that could melt me. I quickly looked away. If I accidentally made eye contact again, it would be disastrous.

“Uh…so, everyone else is starting on the work. We’ll excuse ourselves.” I said quickly, almost tripping over my words. I grabbed Thaam’s wrist and pulled him out immediately, trying not to run as North had advised.

For goodness’ sake…why does my heart react so strongly? Just his smile and I’m nearly dying here!!

He has a serious partner now.

He has a serious partner now.

He has a SERIOUS PARTNER NOW!!!

“Ter! Watch out, you’re about to walk into a pillar!” A voice from behind brought me back to reality, and I stopped my feet just in time. Phew, I almost kissed a pillar.

“What have you been spacing out about since just now?” Ploy, who was working with us, asked. She’s very cheerful and easy to get along with. She had been talking to everyone around, probably knows everyone by now, “Are you okay?”

“No, no, I was just thinking randomly, sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing to me? Oh!” Suddenly, another girl ran up and grabbed Ploy’s arm, startling her.

“Ploy, look, look, Phii Hill is also helping paint the backdrop. Wow, he’s so cool, let’s sneak some photos.”

“Oh, you…you scared me. Do you like him?”

“Crazy, I’m just a fan. Everyone likes him, let’s go ask for a photo.”

“Okay, okay, but won’t it be a bother?”

“Let’s ask first, come on.” In the end, Oi dragged Ploy to where Phii Hill was busy painting. If you looked closely, you’d see other women sneaking glances at him and acting all shy. Wow…quite the heartthrob, isn’t he?

But there are some who are really serious, probably the campus stars who have a crush on him. After all, the month has to match with the stars, right? But why did you look at me while saying that!?

Then Oi; she got a picture with Phii Hill, but it was just standing next to each other and taking a simple photo. Ploy switched to taking photos too. It seemed like Phii Hill didn’t show any signs of annoyance at being disturbed while working.

“Easter, could you go help them over there with the sewing?” Thaam said.

“Okay, khrap.” I replied politely, again.

Everyone here was busy sewing, probably for stage decorations, rolling the fabric and pinning them into flower shapes. Is it really a good idea for me to help here?

“How do you do this?” I sat down and asked one of the girls who was rolling the fabric.

“Oh, grab that cloth over there, I’ll teach you.” I reached for a small piece of cloth and tried to roll it as she instructed.

“No, you have to pull it tight for it to look nice.”

“Hmm, this really is something more suited for women, isn’t it?” I said, feeling discouraged, this was definitely craftsmanship.

“Exactly. Look at Thaam, he’s almost done with one, and it looks so beautiful.”

“Wow, meticulous work.” I complimented, Thaam does everything so neatly. I turned back to my work, wrapping and then needing to find a pin.

“Holding it like that is dangerous, you know.” Suddenly, a big hand took the cloth from in front of me, and the tall figure knelt in front of me. Oh…it’s him again!!

I was startled so much that my eyes widened, oh dear, too close, Phii Hill’s face was calm but with a slight smile. I quickly averted my gaze, not smooth at all, he must know I was deliberately avoiding eye contact.

“Here, you hold it like this. And the pin goes…” I looked down at his hand demonstrating. I didn’t want to praise, but he’s really good. Is he a pro at sewing?

“Phii Hill, that’s beautifully done, I didn’t know it could be like this.” The girl next to me said.

“Yes, but be careful not to prick your finger with the needle.”

“Oh, thank you.”

Then he stood up and left. Suddenly, I realized we’ve never spoken properly, except for that first time when he called out my name, after that, nothing. Just now, it was like a senior teaching a junior, not particularly talking to me. Or is he purposely acting like he doesn’t know me?

   So that’s how it is? From now on, our relationship will just be senior-junior in the club, just colleagues, right?

   That’s good…yeah, that’s good. That’s how I’ve always wanted it to be, isn’t it?

Even if we meet, we pretend not to know each other like this.

   “Phii Hill is so kind, no wonder everyone likes him with that handsome face and kind heart.”

“Exactly, should we join his fan club?”

“Let’s do it, I’ve saved so many of his pictures from the page.”

“Wow, no wonder you have so many pictures of guys.”

“But I can’t choose a side. I like Phii Fondao, but I don’t want Phii Hill to have a girlfriend. So I’ll go with Phii Hill’s team with us.”

“Oh my, this imagination!”

Then the girls continued to gossip, and I started wondering why I had to be close to this gossip circle all the time. The more famous he gets, the more people like him, which makes me even more annoyed.

   Kind? That guy is clearly a devil in disguise as a saint.

   I sat there folding cloth, some turned out nice, most didn’t. He brought them back for me to redo. I redid them. If they didn’t pass, I redid them again, looping like this for almost two or three times.

   “Wait, juniors, help collect the stuff, okay? Thank you for helping out today, have a safe journey back.” The seniors let us go home. I helped put the cloth away, planning to leave quickly.

“Nong Ter, come eat.” Phii Pim called out to me, waiting right in front of the storage room. Sigh, there goes my plan to slip away unnoticed.

“Sure.” I replied, slowly following her.

When we got to the parking lot, Phii Bua, Phii Dew, and Phii Hill were standing by the car I remembered Phii Hill got out of this morning. I tried not to look at the tall figure and stood beside Phii Bua instead.

“We were thinking of going for Japanese food, Nong Ter, are you okay with that?” Phii Bua asked. That’s great, Japanese food is my favorite, though I haven’t had it in a while because of money issues.    “Okay.”

“Great, then let’s get in the car.” said Phii Dew, and Phii Hill walked around to the driver’s side, Phii Bua sat in the front passenger seat, while I ended up sitting in the back with Phii Pim and Phii Dew. Wow, this is a really fancy car. I don’t know much about cars, but I bet this one costs a pretty penny, and it’s spotless with a faint nice smell to boot.

“Hey, I thought you’d bring the Benz,” said the senior sitting next to me.

“That one’s borrowed by dad, his car broke down.” Phii Hill glanced at the rearview mirror, making me look away.

“But this one is even more expensive than a Benz, I’ve heard.”

“Not exactly, it’s a Porsche, but I can’t remember the model.” Phii Hill said as he started the car and drove out of the parking lot. While on the way, I looked out of the window from the side seat, noticing some people turning to look. This must really be a luxury car, no doubt. Are these guys that rich? Wow, I barely dare to move, scared of scuffing the seat.

After a while, we pulled into the mall’s parking lot. Hmm? Are we going to eat Japanese food in the mall? Isn’t that going to be too expensive? I’ve only eaten there occasionally with family for big celebrations, but of course, since I’ve been living on my own, I can’t afford to come near a mall.

“Wow, can you handle the price?” Phii Pim asked.

“Sort of.” Phii Hill replied, before we all entered. Actually, if I get to eat Japanese food which I haven’t had in ages, I’d be fine sitting with them for a bit, even if it means sitting far at the end of the table. Plus, I won’t have to pay, so Ter gets to eat for free again (after those free cakes and cocoa, huh).

“Five people, please follow me to the innermost table.” The hostess at the counter greeted us with a bow and led us inside. The restaurant was beautifully decorated, giving off an authentic Japanese vibe. If there were kimonos to change into, you’d think you were in Japan for real.

There was a small fountain by our table, creating a very romantic atmosphere.

This place would be great for a date.

“Nong Ter, come sit here.” called Phii Bua, and when I turned around, everyone was already seated except for the spot directly across from Phii Hill. Oh no, I shouldn’t have been zoning out.

“Come on, let’s order. Nong Ter, order whatever you want. It’s on us.” said Phii Bua, handing me the menu. Of course, I knew I’d be sitting opposite Phii Hill, so I avoided eye contact, but was he looking at me? Ugh, I, Ter, feel so awkward.    Wow!! The prices are outrageous, sushi at hundreds per piece. I wanted to order sashimi, but a plate costs nearly a thousand! I wanted to but felt too shy to order something so expensive in front of the seniors. Better go for something cheaper, even ramen here is five hundred! My goodness, one plate would mean no more meals for the rest of the month.

   Everyone seemed to be ordering a lot. Why does everyone have so much money?

   “A large set of salmon sashimi, please.” Phii Hill ordered. I looked at the menu, that’s insane. Almost fifteen hundred for the large set!

“Wow, so lavish.” Phii Pim teased.

“Aren’t you ordering, Nong Ter? Do you need help choosing?” Fortunately, Phii Bua was sitting next to me and helped out, “Do you like ramen? Or do you want to order a rice set? You don’t have to order sushi, the seniors have already ordered a lot.”

“Oh…Then I’ll just have sushi.”

“Alright then. That’s fine, Hill has already ordered sashimi too, do you want to share some dessert?”

“Umm, I’ll order dessert later.” I said, handing the menu to the waiter. The waiter repeated the order and left.

“Hey, let’s gossip a bit. Earlier you said there’s someone you’re serious about.

Who is it?” Phii Pim immediately brought up the topic.

“Yeah, I want to know too! Come on, you haven’t told anyone, right? Promise you won’t.”

“You guys can’t tell anyway. If you do, I won’t let you see the lecture.” Phii Hill said.

“Look, that’s how people are. If I don’t get your lecture, how would I pass without the F-grade?”

“So, are you going to tell us who it is? Is it Fon, Fern, or Mild?”

“No.”

“Come on, give us a hint at least.”

“You’ll find out soon enough. But you promised not to tell anyone.”

Phii Hill left it at that, and then the food arrived. I was also curious about who he meant, but when the food reached the table, everyone’s attention, including mine, shifted.

   Sigh, oh how I missed this salmon. I picked up several pieces from the large platter with my chopsticks and placed them on my plate before eating.

   “Do you like it?” asked the person in front of me. I looked up, thinking he might be asking about the sashimi. Huh? Asking me? And then he smiled like that again.

Stop smiling like that!!

“Yes…I do.” I quickly looked down and stuffed more salmon into my mouth. Phew, my ears feel so hot, why is the AC so low in this restaurant? Don’t start talking to me again, you crazy senior!

Phii Bua passed dishes from far away to me, and Phii Hill did the same, constantly placing food on my plate. Wow, so kind. I could only nod in thanks, trying not to let my heart race too much. But isn’t he hardly eating at all? Just keep serving me. What does he want? But I decided not to ask anything. I didn’t want to start a conversation.

“Stuffed.”

“Yeah, so full. And it was delicious too. Did you enjoy it, Nong Ter?” asked Phii Bua.

“Yes, it was really delicious.” And it was. I pretty much ate almost all the sashimi by myself, completely losing myself in the food, and then felt a bit guilty about it. If I save up enough money, I’ll definitely come back here if I get the chance.

“Okay, since we’re full, let’s head out.” and then we all got up from the table and stood outside waiting. Only Phii Hill paid for the meal. What about the seniors treating us? Or will they split the bill later?

“By the way, you can drop us off at the faculty on your way, and then you can take Ter to his dorm.” Phii Dew said after we got in the car. Ugh. If they get dropped off, it’ll just be me and him alone. No, no, no.

“Okay.” Phii Hill agreed.

Ter, you need to think of an excuse quickly, tell him you’ll get off at some restaurant or on the way. Crazy, if I get off on the way, I’ll have to walk a long distance, it’s hot, or if I get off at a restaurant, which restaurant? Should I say I want to stop buying something? But which shop would that be? I’ve never been this way before, I don’t know any shops.

   “Thanks, take care.” said Phii Pim, Phii Dew, and Phii Bua as they got out. Oh no, because I was too busy overthinking, in the end, I’m left alone in the car with him. Jesus!!

“You can sit in the front if you want.”    “Uh…no, it’s fine.”

“If you don’t, it’s like I’m your chauffeur.” He said. Hmm, he has a point, but with the front seat empty and me in the back, it really does look like he’s driving for me. So, reluctantly, I moved to the front seat.

Oh my, I’m all nervous now.

“Was the food good?”

“Ye…Yes, it was good.” I said quietly. Oh, I told him not to start a conversation, darn it!

“So, shall we do this again next time?”

“Huh…Uh…No…It’s okay.”

Is he inviting me? Was that an invitation? I’m so flustered I can barely speak, can you turn up the AC a bit, I’m hot, he gave a small laugh at my response, and then there was no more conversation between us, I felt extremely awkward. Whether he tried to talk or if it was just silent, it was all awkward, being with him was just awkward.

   “See you then.” He said with a smile as the car stopped in front of my dorm, and I quickly opened the door to get out.

“Thank you.” I said in a low voice, so low I thought he might not have heard. I closed the car door, and the luxury car drove off.

Sigh…

“Hey, you.” I walked into my room to find North playing games again. This was the usual sight when I opened the door, “I’m hungry, let’s eat.”

“I’ve eaten. The seniors took me out for a treat.”

“Nice. And how was it with the guy you hate?”

“I’ll tell you later, I’m so tired right now for some reason.” I flopped onto the bed.

I didn’t know why I felt so tired when I hadn’t done anything particularly strenuous, maybe it was my heart working hard. Sigh, the sashimi was good, but not like this.

And then I drifted off to sleep…

…

“Ter, wake up!”

“Huh, what’s up?” I woke up with a start because North was shaking me.

“Don’t sleep in the evening, or your spirit might leave your body.”

“Huh? Why?”

“I don’t know, that’s what they say back at my place. Don’t sleep, or you won’t be able to sleep at night.”

“Okay, okay.” I got up reluctantly. If I couldn’t sleep at night, it would be troublesome, so I got up and turned on my computer, checking my usual routine on Facebook.

Then I stumbled upon another post from a cute girl. It probably wasn’t about those three girls who are always shipping each other again.    Cute Boy &  Girl – MU – shared a picture of Hill Ratchakit

   Squeal!! Clear this up, Doctor Hill! Oh my, I’m so embarrassed for you, it’s so sweet. Who was eating Japanese food with our Hill? What does the trio of girls think about this? Can you guess who it might be? And look at the caption, wow. He’s not usually like this, huh? P.S. It looks like they spent quite a bit on the meal.

   Huh!? Went to eat Japanese food? That was just now? Did Phii Hill take the picture!?

   I quickly clicked to see the full image.

   It was a photo just of our plates. From the angle, it must have been Phii Hill who took it, but when did he take it? I didn’t notice. I don’t know if it was intentional, but it looks like there’s only the two of us in the picture, no one else.    Hill Ratchakit – Added a new photo, 1 photo – 20 minutes ago

   Can I keep giving you these treats? Can we continue this? 🙂

   

   EASTTAGYOUREMINE CHAPTERS HOME

EASTTAGYOUREMINE, Chapter  2: When We Meet Again

   After we finished off the generous amount of pork steak on the plate, which was enough for all three of us to be full, it was worth the price, but if we had to pay for it ourselves, we’d be in trouble. I, having napped for nearly two hours, felt much refreshed. We then just hung out, read, and chatted until it was time for the senior’s meeting.

The three of us had to squeeze onto Foam’s single bike because he only had one. Luckily, nothing bad happened, though it was quite dangerous (don’t try this at home, kids). When we arrived, we parked in the faculty parking lot. I glanced over at the medical faculty building next to ours, and my heart felt a strange flutter.

He must be here, right…

Is it possible that after studying for several more years, with faculties next to each other, we wouldn’t see or bump into each other? Without even thinking about it, one could easily say it’s highly unlikely. I have to be careful not to let him see me. I’ll be on guard for the next six years…Sigh…

“Why is the medical faculty’s building so beautiful? And they even have their own dormitory. Plus, the coffee is good, it’s just not fair.” Foam complained after getting off the bike. I looked at the building in detail; it was really beautiful, probably recently renovated.

“Just because their faculty has better coffee, you feel inferior?”

“And the person selling it is cute too.”

“Yeah, it’s really unfair.”

“Why? Our faculty’s coffee shop lady is cute too, and she’s super kind. She always gives me extra snacks when I go there.” I chimed in.

“You’re her favorite. When I buy coffee, if she doesn’t throw the coffee machine at me, that’s good enough.” Foam said, laughing.

“That’s because you’re a nuisance.” I told him, and then we reached the base of our faculty building.

‘Warning! Do not feed Rice Sticky, he’s already very fat!’

   There was a sign attached to the central pillar, almost like a major hazard warning, like “Warning! The building is about to collapse!” Did they really need to make such a big vinyl sign for this?

“Why? Does sticky rice really make dogs that fat?” Foam asked, confused.    “Foam! Sticky Rice is the dog’s name, haha, where have you not known our faculty’s celebrity dog?” I explained, and Typhoon laughed heartily.

“I didn’t know.” He said, pouting slightly.

We arrived during the big meeting. Not many people were there, just some from our year and some seniors who had been invited. Our faculty isn’t that large, but it’s not small either, so it’s kind of medium-sized, definitely not as crowded as the Science or Engineering faculties.

“Freshmen who are here, please line up here to get your name tags for the semester opening.” a senior girl with a megaphone announced in front of the meeting room, prompting everyone, including us three, to queue up.

“What’s your nickname, and what’s your student ID?” When it was my turn, she asked for my name and ID.

“Easter, ID 034.”

“Easter, 034, huh? That’s a unique name, cute too. Are you interested in running for Faculty Moon?” The senior writing the name tag looked up to tease me, smiling as if she was just joking around.

“Is he a freshman?” another senior chimed in to tease.

“The freshmen are cute.”

“Haha, I guess I could apply.” I said playfully. In truth, I didn’t want to. No way, I’m way too shy when there are lots of people around.

“Hahaha, that’s enough, I can’t talk long, the person behind you is about to eat you up.” I turned around to look, and Foam was staring so hard it seemed like his eyes were about to pop out. “Here’s your name tag.”

I took the name tag made of cardboard with thanks and hung it around my neck. It was just a simple circle of cardboard with my name, ID, and faculty written in fresh, hot ink just moments ago. I overheard the seniors mentioning that this wasn’t the official tag. The real one would be nicer, but only after the freshman activities are completed.

Once everyone had their tags, we were directed into the main conference room by our seniors where there were introductions, talks, and some of us had to come out to dance, play drums, or sing for fun, creating a very warm welcoming atmosphere.

“Alright, we’ll have a senior from the Student Union come to speak briefly.

Please listen attentively.” and then a female senior came up with a cheerful demeanor.

“Hello everyone, let me introduce myself first. I’m Phii Bua, and today I’m here to talk about the Student Union, or as we’ll call it, ‘The Union’.” Phii Bua then went on at length about the Union. It sounds similar to a student council, with an elected president, roles distributed among members, mainly overseeing student activities.

The Union will have representatives from each faculty, three from each.    “And by joining the Union, you’ll gain valuable experience in teamwork and responsibility.” I tried to listen intently, but it wasn’t all that interesting. “And our president this year, many of you already know who it is. Seriously, many friends of mine joined the Union despite the heavy workload, just because the president is really handsome, very handsome indeed. You’ll have to see for yourself how handsome he is. Look, some of the girls are suddenly paying attention, haha!”    “Seriously, using a handsome president as a selling point?” Foam whispered to me and Typhoon, but I think having a good-looking president really does attract people. There are always some types who exist just to squeal over good-looking guys (I’ve noticed with my two female friends, they’d even go play soccer, box, or hit the gym just to check out guys. The latest was almost dying from studying just because there was a rumor that a guy from another faculty was handsome, damn it).

“You don’t know anything, having a handsome guy is a huge selling point.” I told him.

“For those of you who applied for the Khunying Ratana Scholarship.” This sentence immediately caught my attention, even though I was about to continue joking with Foam. This was the scholarship I had applied for.

“You’ll have to help out at the Union anyway, because you need to accumulate activity hours. Can those who applied for the scholarship please raise your hands?” I raised my hand as instructed, and only four of us did. If we have to help at the Union, it means more work. Initially, I thought from the announcement that it was just about assisting professors, T^T.

“Only four of you? Okay, you four come see me here, and also those who want to join the Union, come sign up here. That’s the end of our Union presentation. Thank you for listening attentively.” After she finished speaking, I, along with several others, got up to go see Phii Bua. It seemed like quite a few people were interested in joining the Union, but they’d have to go through another selection process since they’re only taking three from each faculty.

“Move aside!” Suddenly, I was pushed from behind while walking through the gap between chairs. I quickly turned around to see a woman about my height (I’m 165 cm), with quite a bit of makeup on, more than anyone else around here. She was pretty, but why did she have to push me?

“An, don’t rush, you’ve bumped into him.” said another woman, scolding the one who pushed me, named Ann, before turning to me to apologize slightly. I smiled back.

“Hurry up, or someone will sign up before us.” and then the two girls ran off. Is this what competing for a spot in society is like? Usually, isn’t it that people don’t want to join?

   I heard it’s hard work

I stood in line for a while and then wrote my name on the scholarship application list.

“Is it true that this year’s president is studying medicine? If he’s really hot, I’d want him to give me a shot.” one of the girls said while we were all waiting for others to sign up. Those called out were moved to wait outside the meeting room, as there seemed to be some additional briefings, and they didn’t want to disturb the meeting inside.

“He’s hot, super hot, according to our seniors. I checked his Facebook, and he’s got the looks.”

“Check his Instagram, he’s perfect in every way, handsome, rich, smart. They say he topped his faculty last term with a 4.00, something no one has done in years.”

“Wow, is he single?”

“I don’t know, but it would be weird if such a person was single. There were rumors he was seeing Fandao.”

“Fandao, the star of the Nursing Faculty second year, right? So pretty. How can we compete with that?”

“Dream on. Even if he’s single, he’s not going to look at us, haha.”

“Is it true he’s with Fandao? But I saw on his FB some were teasing him about talking to Thanmild.”

“Thanmild, the star of the Second-Year Med students? Wow, is he going to pick all the stars from the sky?”

“They do make a good pair, both good-looking and with great profiles.”    The girls seemed to be gossiping away. I wasn’t intentionally listening, standing beside them. It just makes you wonder if jealousy is creeping in, right? Someone with his looks, wealth, and studying medicine. Do you think this is like school where you could just get stars for a toy? Not fair, as Foam said, and their coffee is even better (?)

Just kidding, Auntie Sri’s coffee is the best…#TeamAuntieSri

Anyway, girls just want a handsome boyfriend with a good profile, I understand. I really do. T^T

   Even though I’m not as handsome as some, there’s no one quite like me…#NotHandsomeButDelicious

   “The freshmen who applied for the Union, I will set another date for the selection. Please keep following the Union’s page. As for those who applied for the scholarship, we’ll meet tomorrow at 9:30 AM in the Union room. Thank you all, you can now join the other activities with your faculty. See you.” Phii Bua said her goodbyes, then gathered her large bag of documents and walked out. A small senior had to carry such a big bag, really? I’m too soft-hearted, I wanted to help, but my faculty seniors were already calling for me.

“Did you apply for the scholarship too?” someone suddenly nudged my shoulder. It was a guy about my height, fair-skinned, wearing thick glasses, looking very much like a studious type. His name tag read ‘Thaam’.

“Yes, yes, I’m Easter, or just ‘Ter’.”

“I’m ‘Thaam’. See you tomorrow at the Union room.”

“Uh, okay, see you.” I smiled at him. A real nerd, very nerdy. Plus, he was polite, not using ‘I’ or ‘me’ casually like I would. And in the end, I even found myself saying ‘you’ to him.

“Come back to everyone who stepped out.” I walked back to my seat. Soon, the seniors called out names according to our student IDs and mentioned something important.

“What’s up?” I asked Foam and Typhoon, curious about what had happened while I was away.

“Nothing much, just the seniors were chatting among themselves.”

“033…034” I went to collect a small letter envelope, with the senior instructing us not to open it yet.

“You can open the envelopes now. What you’ve received is from your senior with the same ID number. It might contain clues, instructions, or whatever. Please find your senior within the next two weeks. If not, there will be a penalty, but it won’t hurt physically, just be embarrassing.”

I opened my envelope right away, excited to see what my senior wrote.

‘Your senior is in the Union.’

   The Union again! Why does it feel like my life is going to be intertwined with the Union? And that’s all the clue I got. I have to figure out which senior from our faculty is in the Union and who among them is my senior.

“What did your senior say?” Foam asked. I handed him the paper to look at,

“Yours is better. Look at mine.”

‘Your senior wants you to do 50 push-ups and post a video on your

Facebook (Your senior follows your Facebook) (Our line must be strong)’

   “Your senior must have been a military leader or something.”

“And yours, Typhoon?”

‘Your senior wears a green, black, white watch, depending on what your senior feels like wearing.’

   “Wow!! What’s this? Your senior is super indie. Besides not giving any real clue, it’s also annoying.”

After a while, the seniors let us go home. We all went our separate ways. When I got back to the dorm, I found that North hadn’t returned yet, and it was almost nine o’clock. Engineering is really tough; he’ll probably come back looking like boiled vegetables again.

I turned on my computer and started scrolling through my Facebook feed, thinking I’d go for a shower later, until I stumbled upon a post.    Cute Boy & Girl – MU added 2 new photos – 1 hour ago

Let’s see who’s hanging out at the medical faculty building right now. Here’s Dr. Hill, looking stunning, even while doing his nails. Even his profile view is dreamy, sigh, can he stop looking at beakers and look at us instead? Wait, who’s that waiting outside? Oh, it’s #Phii Baifern, the beauty from the management faculty, waiting for her potential boyfriend? Are you ready to go public, Doctor? @Hill Ratchakit @Baifern Nantacha

   The first picture was of Phii Hill holding a beaker, probably in the lab, taken from the side.

The second photo showed a woman sitting on the balcony outside, smiling and holding up a peace sign to the camera. She was adorable, very cute. These two photos were definitely taken in the same place, judging by the floor pattern.    Hmm…I…what should I say? It feels weird, like a pang? Not quite. Just a little twist in the stomach. Of course, he’d have a girlfriend!! Being the star, surrounded by pretty girls like the moon surrounded by stars. It’s typical for someone as famous and handsome as him, huh!

And me? He probably thinks, who am I? Is there someone like me even existing in this world?

Not worth remembering, right? That’s me…

Pfft…

Enough! Ter, no drama. No way!! Stay cheerful! That’s it, I won’t think, won’t know, won’t see anything!!

I set the post to “Don’t show me this post again.” I didn’t want to unlike the page because I still wanted to follow the girls, since this is the only main page of the university. There are no other pages to follow.

Then I shut down my computer and decided to go out for a walk, maybe find some snacks. No need to think about anything strange anymore…    Hill Ratchakit commented on Cute Boy & Girl – MU – 1 minute ago Sorry, admin, could you please delete this post?

   I wandered out of the dorm, not knowing where to go. Initially, I thought of getting some ice cream, but the shop was closed, and there were so many people out because it’s the time when everyone goes out to eat. The traffic was backed up for three traffic lights. Good thing I don’t have a car; walking is much more convenient(?). The area behind my university is like a food zone.

Finally, I reached a restaurant that wasn’t too crowded. I decided to eat there.

Honestly, I should have thought about rice before heading to the ice cream shop.

After sitting down and ordering, I took out my phone to kill time.

Ding!

A notification from Messenger from my group with Foam and Typhoon. This is the group of just the three of us:

Foam not plastic: You’re going to the Union event tomorrow, right Ter?

   Easter Panupong: Yeah, why?

   Teerapat Typhoon: We felt sorry for you going alone, thinking of coming along as an accompaniment.

   Easter Panupong: It’s okay, I’ve got a friend going with me, just met him.

   Foam not plastic: Who?

   Easter Panupong: His name’s Thaam, from our faculty, he approached me when I went out to sign up.

   Foam not plastic: That rude guy.

   Easter Panupong: Huh??? How is he rude?

   Teerapat Typhoon: You should call him ‘Young Master Thaam’. Everyone does, even the seniors.

   Easter Panupong: Boom? Like he’s from some noble lineage?

TeerapatTyphoon: He’s not, but you probably noticed. He speaks very politely, very well-mannered. Even if someone teases or is rude to him, he doesn’t respond in kind. So everyone calls him ‘Young Master’.

   Easter Panupong: Oh, he’s very polite, I even found myself saying ‘khrap’ to him.

   Looks like this Thaam is quite well-known, even the seniors call him that, but from what I’ve seen, he doesn’t seem pretentious, and I don’t dislike him.

“Oh, Ter.” a sweet, small voice called out my name, making me look up from my phone screen.

“Phii Thanmild, hello.” I was a bit surprised before quickly putting down my phone to waive in respect. She was a senior from my old school. I didn’t expect to meet her here in this distant place.

“Why study here? I thought you’d stay closer to home. Can I sit with you?” I gave her a smile indicating it was okay for her to sit. She seemed to have finished eating and was about to head back, just stopping by for a chat, but I wasn’t really in the mood to talk.

Phii Thanmild used to date Phii Ohm, who was a friend of Phii Hill. So, I’ve seen her around quite often, but many times, her looks, her smiles, or some of her actions made me uncomfortable. She seemed to prefer the company of Phii Hill more than her own boyfriend, Phii Ohm, especially during the times when I…well, when I was talking with Phii Hill a lot, she would often come and interrupt. I don’t know, maybe I’m just overthinking it.

“Just wanted a change of scenery.” I answered with a forced smile.

“Hmm, what faculty are you in?”

“Veterinary, and you, Phii?”

“Medicine. How long have you been here?”

“About a week now.” So, Phii Thanmild is studying medicine too? That means she’s even closer to Phii Hill. But I heard Phii Ohm, who was with her, transferred to Pharmacy at another university. They must have broken up.

   “Have you gotten used to it yet? This place is easy to get lost in, I was super confused when I first came, but Hill was there to help.” she mentioned, catching me off guard because I didn’t expect his name to come up so soon.

“Oh…yes. I’m still not quite used to it, I get lost a lot.” I said, taking a sip of water to calm my nerves.

“Hill is here too, studying medicine. Have you guys met?” Her voice was cheerful, but it seemed forced.

“Really? I didn’t know he was studying here.”

“Oh, the Veterinary and Medicine faculties are close, you’ll definitely meet soon. He became really famous the moment he arrived, no question he was voted as the university moon, he’s super hot. Both real and fake girls are all over him.”    “Is that so…” I gave a dry smile, wishing she would realize I didn’t want to hear about this.

“But you know, I’m also a faculty star. Even though I’m not as famous as Hill, not many people know me.” she added. The star of the medical faculty…Ah! That’s who the girls were gossiping about this morning, saying that Phii Mild, the Star of Medicine, was talking with the society president. Whatever. It’s not my business, let’s not talk about this.

“Hmm, and people often ship me with Hill. They say, ‘The star should be with the moon’, or something like that. The Twitter buzz is strong, I feel like I’m constantly being watched and paired up.” Phii Thanmild said, smiling awkwardly, her voice trying to convey concern, but her eyes told a different story.

“Uh, that’s tough.” I managed to say.

“Well, I should go. See you around.” she smiled at me before standing up and leaving the restaurant.

What’s with all this shipping…

She probably doesn’t realize how I feel about it, huh? Sigh…I thought I had moved on, but seeing it in reality still hurts a bit. Especially since Phii Thanmild is so close to him, it feels like I’ve been completely thrown out of his orbit…

   9:07 AM

   It’s another day I have to wake up early because of club activities, and since I didn’t sleep at all yesterday, I could get a quick shower and rest when I got back to my room, making it on time for the meeting today. I walked into the club room, and Thaam greeted me.

“Hello.”

“Uh, hello.”

“Let’s go over there, it seems like they’ve called everyone together.”    Phii Bua, the same person, explained that we were close to the time for the concert event, which would be held at the sports field and could accommodate the entire university. It’s not a grand event, just something to help freshmen bond and have fun. It’s scheduled from evening until around 10 PM, with some famous bands performing. Our job was to set up the venue. This mostly involved arranging the stage, signs, and such, with the sound, lighting, and effects being handled by another professional team.

“This will be the first event where we all work together. Even though it’s not a big event, please put in your effort. Let me introduce ‘Phii Phim’, he’s in charge of coordination, and he will assign duties to everyone.”

Then the team leader gave out tasks, but the overall management was already being taken care of by the seniors. The manual labor was left for us freshmen. “Ten guys, go carry the wooden boards from the Union storage room, the big ones near the front.” Phii Phim instructed. So, I, Thaam, and several others went to move them.

“Phew, Phoon, how long has it been since they cleaned here?”

“Well, if there’s no need for the stuff, they probably won’t bother to open this room.”

I guessed these boards were for signs to be displayed behind the stage. We carried them out to the front area, while others were busy with tasks assigned by Phii Phim, like preparing paint, cleaning equipment, or getting curtains ready. Mostly freshmen were doing the work because, as the seniors said, they also had to do it when they were freshmen.

“Ah, align the boards, you’ve got that one on the wrong side.”

“Phim, we’ve got all the boards laid out, what’s next?” Phii Bua called for the team leader to come check.

“Paint over the old color with white first, or should we flip them over?”    “Uh…”

“We’re not sure either.”

“What kind of coordinator are you?”

“Ugh, the president didn’t brief us fully.” Phii Phim rolled her eyes.

“And where’s the president? He just leaves everyone else to work hard while he disappears.”

“He’s asleep in the club’s lounge, hey juniors.” PhiiPhim called out to me, who was standing closest, “Sorry, could you wake up the president? He’s sleeping on the sofa in the club room so we can continue with the work.”

“Sure.” I responded without thinking much about it and ran into the club room as directed by the team head.

It was a glass-walled room with a sign saying “No Entry Without Permission.” but I had been given permission by Phii Phim. I gently opened the door to be greeted by a blast of cold air. Ah…it must be nice to be in an air-conditioned room while we’re all out there getting tanned and stressed.

I tiptoed inside, not sure why I was sneaking as if the room’s silence made me afraid to make noise, but aren’t I here to wake someone up? If the noise wakes him, that’s fine, right?

I saw a figure lying on the long sofa, a tall guy, lying on his back with a book covering his face, as if he had fallen asleep while reading.

“…Phii, Phii.” I whispered softly, but the person in front of me showed no signs of waking up, so I had to nudge him.

“Phii, Phii Phim sent me to wake you up.” I shook his arm gently, and when he still didn’t stir, I had to increase my force until he seemed to be waking up. He then reached up to remove the book from his face.

“Hmm…” I quickly stood up, expecting him to be upset, but I was just following orders.

“Uh, sorry, Phii Phim told me to…” My voice trailed off when I saw his face. At first, he looked annoyed, his eyebrows furrowed, but seeing me, he was as shocked as I was.

“…Ter.” He murmured my name, bringing me back to reality.    Thump!    Thump!

I didn’t know what to do; suddenly, my heart was pounding so hard I could feel something shaking violently in my chest. What should I do? I never imagined we’d meet like this, and my plan to avoid him for six years had crumbled in just two days!

There was silence between us for about three seconds before I decided to run! My legs moved before my brain could command them, and I sprinted out of the room. He, still on the sofa, was startled but then quickly followed.

“Wait…wait.” I heard him shout after me. When I ran outside, everyone was taken aback.

“Hold up, Nong Ter, what’s wrong?” Phii Pim shouted after me as I ran out past the Union courtyard, then stopped, panting heavily. It looked like no one was following me.

Damn it!! Why did I suddenly run out like this? Everyone must be so confused right now!!!

…

“Where’s Hill?” Dew, another senior from the Union, came over to ask the team and Bua who were talking.

“He must be asleep, so I sent a freshman to wake him up.” Pim said.

“Are you crazy? Hill hates being woken up. Last time I made a freshman wake him up like this, the kid came out crying. I don’t know if he yelled at the kid or what.”

“Oh no, I didn’t know. What do we do if we don’t wake him up?”    “Maybe we just wait for him to wake up on his own. Will the freshman be okay?” Dew asked. Pim and Bua looked at each other, “Let’s hope he doesn’t do anything to the freshman…”

After a while, they saw Easter running out from the Union room, looking as if he was about to cry, with Hill shouting after him.

“Hold up, Nong Ter, what’s wrong?” Pim shouted after him, but the freshman didn’t stop. When Hill ran after him, everyone intercepted him.

“Damn it, what did you do to him?” Pim asked in a displeased tone. If something went wrong, it wouldn’t be good, especially since the professors had repeatedly instructed that the seniors should look after the freshmen.

“…” Hill didn’t answer, just kept looking at Easter who had run off.

“We told the freshman to go wake you up themselves. Pim didn’t know you’d get mad.” Dew said.

“He’s crying, this is bad, what should we do?” Bua showed concern, since she was the one who brought the freshman here, she couldn’t help but worry.    “Yeah, this is bad, what should we do?” Hill spoke up, his face showing a bit of worry. The three friends looked at each other without any prearrangement.    “Normally, you’d say ‘forget it’, right?”

 

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