SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 39: Ten and Million

   Since today we planned to celebrate together in the evening, but the doctors had classes, we decided to hang out in the morning first. Right now, there’s me, North, and Ter, who were dropped off by the doctors, playing at a cafe in the mall waiting for Daotok to join us to watch a movie. Foam said he’d only come in the evening because he didn’t want to be out in the sun.

   “It’s taking forever,” North started complaining.

“Dao drives so slowly,” Ter said, “I saw him once, driving 30mph.”

“Shit, when will he get here?”

“Drive safely, man.”

“Like you’re riding a bike.”

“And you’re really going to watch that movie?” I asked again for reassurance, as North had volunteered to choose the movie himself. Of course, someone as afraid of ghosts like North would choose a horror movie…I don’t quite understand why, but it seems he likes them because they scare him, given his vivid imagination compared to those who don’t watch them.

“Yeah, I’m serious.”

“You’ll scream your head off in the theater again,” Ter said, shaking his head lightly.

“What. Who’s screaming? Me? That’s a laugh, Ter, you’re the one who screams.”

“Oh, we’ll see.”

“Aren’t you scared?” I asked.

“I am scared.”

“Then why watch? You’re scared of ghosts but still watch horror movies, that’s weird.”

“Well, if you’re not scared, what’s the fun in watching? Horror movies are only fun if they scare you.”

“…Yeah, that’s true,” I nodded in agreement, furrowing my brows at him, “Did you tell Dao about watching a horror movie?”

“I told him, and Dao said he’s fine with it, he likes watching them,” Ter said.

“See, you’ve found someone with the same taste.”

“Dao gets along with you like a house on fire.”

“Has Dao ever not gone along with us?” Ter said, “Even though he doesn’t like celebrations. Just a little coaxing and he agrees to come.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” I nodded in agreement, because usually, he always refuses when we invite him out. This time, we tried coaxing him, and Dao agreed more easily than expected. If Dao had refused again, I wouldn’t have pushed further; he really doesn’t like celebrations or crowded places, especially if there are people he’s not close with.

And if we invite him like this, will Dao feel uncomfortable? Oh no, I was just thinking about getting him out of his room to meet us, forgetting that he might feel uncomfortable.

Not long after, Daotok arrived, sat down next to me in the shop.

“Have you booked the movie yet?” asked the new arrival.

“Ugh, another half hour.”

“Oh, it’s a horror movie, right?”

“Yeah,” I replied, “Ugh, Dao, tonight. It’s okay, right? There will be some doctors there, so you won’t feel uncomfortable, will you?”

“…Well.”

“If you feel uncomfortable, it’s okay, I’m sorry. We forgot to consider this. We won’t force you.”    “Does the cat want us to go?”

“Of course, he must want us to.”

“Hmm, then we’ll go. It’s fine, we’ve talked about it with all the fans before.”

“Okay,” I smiled at the person sitting next to me, before Ter ordered more snacks to kill time and forced Dao to eat some too.

“Dao, this is delicious, really, try it.”

“Ter says everything is delicious.”

“Hey, but this one is really good, try it.”

“…” The person next to me. I didn’t respond, then picked up a banana samosa, chewed it slowly, and started to frown, which made Ter look worried right away.

“Not tasty?”

“Well…it’s alright.”

“Have some more, a lot.”

“Is this fattening me up or what?” North spoke up, grabbing some from the plate to eat, “Not wanting to be fat alone, huh, need company to be fat too?”

“Shut up and break that samosa!”

“See, pretending to be tough.”

“Actually, with the new semester starting soon, I miss the beginning of the first year,” I mentioned, remembering, “It’s almost your anniversary with Phii Hill, isn’t it?”    “Hmm, yeah,” Ter nodded.

“Time flies, huh. I remember the first time I knew Phii Hill was flirting with you were like…shit.”

“Shit, because Phii Hill is friends with Phii Fah?”

“Yeah,” I nodded and let out a small laugh, “Back then it was like, shit, the world is so damn small. When I went to find you at the star moon pageant, I got lost with Foam and then Phii Fah was the one who picked me up. At that moment, I almost had a heart attack, especially when I found out he was friends with Phii Hill who was hitting on Ter.”

“I sensed something was off from that moment,” Ter said.

“Really?”

“Yeah, your face looked like you were about to cry.”

“Oh, come on,” I frowned slightly, feeling annoyed, “I thought I was pretty smooth.”    “You, Phoon?”

“Yeah.”

Then we chatted for a while until the movie started. We had seats right in the middle, sitting in order: me, North, Ter, Dao. At first, when the movie started, it wasn’t so bad, but as it went on, the movie’s atmosphere got scarier and more tense. I started to curl up bit by bit, pulling my legs up to hug them.

   “Uhmm…”    North?

What kind of noise is that?

“Don’t…don’t do that, don’t ‘uhmm’.”

“…”

“!!!” As soon as the ghost in the movie appeared, North was so startled that he pulled me into a tight hug, before the popcorn in his hand spilled all over me.

Sticky.

“!!! Why did you pinch me?” North whispered softly because I had just pinched his arm.

“It’s sticky, did you buy the popcorn just to pour it on me?” I whispered back.

“Sorry, I was startled.”

“…” I let the person who suggested watching the horror movie hug my arm, or rather, squeeze it, to the point where I think the blood flow was cut off, because I’m not really scared of ghosts. Just startled by some scenes. Turning to peek, I saw Dao also getting hugged by Ter.

What in the world is this…

   When the movie ended, the person next to me, who finally let go of my arm, felt indescribably relieved as we walked out of the theater.

   “Man, it wasn’t scary at all, you reviewer.”

“Really, North?” I teased back while showing him my arm full of red marks, “Did you bite my shirt too?”

“Heh,” North gave a sheepish smile while lightly scratching his head.

“Damn, my sleeve is full of your saliva.”

“Heh.”

“Still laughing your ‘heh’?”

“North is such a scaredy-cat,” Dao chimed in.

“Ter was hugging you too, wasn’t he? Why don’t you say anything about him?”

“He wasn’t hugging, just hiding. Ter is just normal, but North is super scared.”

“…Uh, so what? Everyone has something they’re afraid of!

Everyone is scared of ghosts!”

“I’m not scared.”

“I’m not really either,” I replied.

“Liar, how do you watch a horror movie without getting scared?”    “The director tries to make us scared,” Dao explained, “Just think that there’s a camera following the actors, and it’s not scary anymore.

Ghosts have to have makeup, and everything else has to be edited, props and all.”

“Ah, that’s it, how can it be fun then?” North mumbled unhappily,

“Your heart is numb to the ghosts now.”

After that, we went for lunch because the doctors had classes all day, making us stay here all day too. At noon, during the break, usually Phii Fah would call me, and today was no different. We talked for a while before hanging up, and I noticed Phii Hill and Phii Jo also called Ter and North.

   “Everyone looks so much livelier after talking with their partners.”

“Don’t you have anyone you interested in?” Ter asked teasingly, and Dao shook his head slightly.

“No.”

“It would be nice if someone took care of you,” I added.

“Oh. I already have someone to take care of.”    “Who!!” the three of us asked in unison.

“Should I tell you?”

“Just give us a hint!”

“He’s very important.”

“How important?”

“The whole world.”

“Wow, he’s as important as the whole world? Are you kidding?”

North started to tease. I exchanged an embarrassed look with Ter, while Daotok just smiled casually, not showing any embarrassment despite what he just said, “Why are you so romantic?”

“Romantic, huh?”

“Yeah, he would be embarrassed if he heard that.”

“But he doesn’t seem embarrassed.”

“Oh, why so cold?”

“Yeah, he’s pretty cold with me, but even so.”

“Wow, I want to see his face.”

“I have a picture.”

“!!! Show it! Show it! Let’s see!” we said loudly enough to startle Dao, who then reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone.

Are you really going to show us? Why so easy? And why haven’t you mentioned him before, like Daotok? And he’s cold on top of that!

What kind of person could be as important as the whole world to Daotok!!

   “Here.”

“!!!”

“What…what is this?!”    “Uh, handsome, huh?”

“Shit! Why show me a picture of a cat?!” North exclaimed immediately because the picture Dao just showed us was of a black cat.

“This is him, my important person.”

“It’s not a person, it’s a cat! How can a cat be an important person?

You should say it’s an important cat.”

“It’s equally important!”

“Hey, you spoke loudly for the first time!” North looked surprised. I was also quite surprised because Dao’s sentence earlier was a bit louder than usual, I emphasize, just a bit. Normally, Dao speaks softly and slowly.

“Is Jon ca—, this person?” Ter asked.

“Uh, this is Jon…my whole world.”    This guy is a cat slave…

   Oh, that’s why they said he acts cold.

   “So, don’t tell me that all this time at work you’ve been…”

“Uh, I have to buy the best food for Jon.”

“Holy shit, working until you end up in the hospital just to buy food for a cat,” North whispered to me. I couldn’t help but laugh at Dao; it was kind of cute.

So, it’s like we can go hungry, but the cat must be full…

   “And why does it have to be Jon?”

“Actually, his name is Jachornsak, shortened to Jon.”

“What kind of cat has the name Jachornsak?” North whispered to me again, almost making me burst out laughing. Dao always likes to give fancy names to everything. Like the cat doll he gave me, it’s named Supaporn.

   Oh…buying cat dolls because he likes cats, huh?

   “Is the reason you like to call me ‘cat’ because you like cats?”    “Exactly. That’s why I love cats so much,” Daotok said happily, which explained why he called me “cat” instead of my name every time. That’s why.

But why do you look so cheerful?

I’ve never seen him smile this wide before…Because he was looking at Jon’s photo, huh? Wow, the power of cats is truly something.    “Oh, so when you said you were saving to move to a condo, it was for…” Ter asked, as if he just remembered.

“Yeah. I’m going to take Jon to live with me, the dorm doesn’t allow pets.”

“Oh,” we nodded in understanding. It explained why Daotok was so hardworking, why he had to work hard every day. It wasn’t just for the car payments, but for Jon’s upkeep too…

“So, where are we heading next?” I asked, checking the time and realizing it wasn’t time for the celebration yet.

“Why not karaoke?”

“Sounds good,” North quickly agreed, since he loved to sing.

“Fine by me,” I said.

“Let’s do it,” Dao said, before we headed to karaoke. Neither I nor

Dao sang; I didn’t sing because I’m not much of a singer and I’m shy. Dao just listened, while North practically monopolized the microphone, occasionally passing it to Ter.

“Damn, Jon!” North, walking beside me, exclaimed, looking over at Ter and Dao talking about cats. When it comes to cats, Daotok becomes a different person. I was still taken aback seeing Dao so cheerful, “I’ve never met such a true cat servant.”

“Same here, it seems like he’s dedicated his life to serving cats.”    “Yeah, working so hard, I thought he had debts, damn, it’s all for the cat.”

“He seems to have clear goals, though.”

“At first, I thought he was secretly dating someone, oh well, all that anticipation for nothing, talking like it’s a person, somehow I feel outdone by it.”

“It’s kind of cute, calling the cat ‘Mister.’ and me ‘cat’, it’s all so confusing.”

“Yeah,” North laughed, before we went outside because Phii Fah was coming to pick us up. We noticed the sky was overcast, “It’s going to rain, it was sunny this morning.”

“Definitely Jon’s power,” I teased, and North laughed again.

“Dao, what are you going to do, ride your motorcycle here?” Ter asked the person next to him.

“I’ll go ahead first.”

“Is that okay? What if it rains on the way?”

“It’s fine, see you at the restaurant.” Then Dao quickly went to the motorcycle parking area. Not long after, Phii Fah’s car arrived and parked, then he lowered the window and told all three of us to get in.    “Hill and Jo are already at the restaurant; it would be too much trouble for everyone to come together.”

“Oh,” North and Ter said in unison from the back seat, and the luxury car moved away from the mall area. I kept looking outside, hoping it wouldn’t rain. Let Dao reach the restaurant first, because riding a motorcycle in the rain is very dangerous.

We got to the restaurant before it started to rain, finding Dao already sitting there, along with Phii Hill and Phii Jo at the same table, plus Foam.

“Isn’t Phii Arthit coming?” I asked.

“He said he had some business. He asked me to tell you he’s happy you passed the exam.”

“Oh,” I nodded slightly before sitting at the table. Just then, it started raining outside, “Good that we came before it rained,” I said, turning to Dao, who nodded slightly in response.

We went to fetch various dishes and brought them back to the table.

Since I’ve known Ter, I’ve been eating at BBQ buffets a lot more often, celebrating every little thing with a BBQ. When we returned to the table, there was alcohol there too.

   “Did you order alcohol too?” I asked Phii Fah.

“North ordered it.”

“Heh, I wanted some. Haven’t had any for a while,” North said with a smile before pouring some into his glass and then asked Phii Jo, “Do you want some?”

“Sure,” Phii Jo nodded slightly.

“Phoon, Ter, Dao, Foam?”

“I’ll have some,” Foam said, handing his glass to North. I hesitated a bit since it had been a while since I drank, then turned to ask Phii Fah for advice.

“Go for it. It’s fine, I told you I’ll take care of it.”

“…Oh, North, please give me some.”

“Ter, want some?”

“No.”

“Ter, want some?”

“No.”

“Ter, want some?” North kept repeating the same question until Ter furrowed his brows at him.

“Hey, you, I said no.”

“Are you my friend?”

“Damn,” Ter swore, feeling cornered by the question, before he had to reluctantly hand his glass over to North.

“Dao, are you my friend?”

“Who is North’s friend?”

“Oh, so it’s Dao.”

“Joking. I rode a motorcycle here, how could I drink?”

“Oh yeah, I forgot. Then never mind,” North said before raising his glass. We raised our toast with him, “Cheers, Typhoon passed the exam, yeah!!”

Our celebration then turned into ordering more and more alcohol, and this place had so much that we started to wonder if it was actually a bar. But after looking closely, we understood; the shop next door was a bar, probably they had some arrangement.

   North was quite the drink mixer, very skilled at it, which might prove true the saying that engineers are good at getting drunk. Looking at how well North mixed drinks, and importantly, no one stopped him.

   After a while, Ter was the first to show signs of being drunk; his face started turning red all the way to his ears, his eyes began to glaze over.

   “Mix more!”

“Why are you shouting?”

“North! Bring the alcohol!!”

“Already drunk and still so fierce.”

“Hurry up!!”

“Yeah, yeah,” North had to quickly pour more alcohol for Ter. Normally, Ter is the kindest saint among us, but why does he get so aggressive when he’s drunk?

   “Am I too slow for you? Huh? Am I too slow?”

“Oh, oh, calm down. You’re a fake saint, aren’t you? Your true nature comes out when you’re drunk,” because of the slow pouring, Ter ended up pulling North’s ear.

“Shut up! Try me!”

“You’re the big shot now, huh? Oh, Phii Hill, stop him, please! My ear is going to come off!”

“Ter, come here,” Phii Hill pulled Ter close without being able to resist, and Ter was flailing around so much that he had to be held tightly.

“Uh, I love you Phii Hill the most.”

“…” And then the whole table went silent with Ter’s words before he fell asleep in Phii Hill’s embrace, his aggressive behavior having dissipated.

   Referring to himself as ‘I ’, why am I feeling embarrassed?

   “Next, Phoon.”

“I think the one pouring is starting to get drunk too.”

“I’m not drunk.”

When Ter gets drunk, he’s the noisy type. I wonder what type North and Foam are.

   Time passed by, and Foam started to slump over the table, drunk. It seems we’ll have to call his roommate to pick him up. Dao took care of calling them. I noticed North was also looking a bit dazed.

   “Why are you so good at holding your liquor, Phoon? I thought I had a pretty strong tolerance.”    “I’m starting to feel dizzy too.”

“Want to have a drinking contest?”

“Let’s do it.”

“…”

Phii Jo and Phii Fah raised their eyebrows slightly, looking at each other, seemingly waiting to see what the two of us, who were starting to get drunk, would do next.

   Phii Hill excused himself to take Ter back home. By now, Foam had passed out, leaving just me and North.

   “Phii Jo, can you mix some for us?” North said, pushing everything in front of him towards Phii Jo.

“Is that a good idea?”

“Jo’s got a heavy hand,” Phii Fah remarked.

“It’s fine,” I answered, “Just make two glasses the same, that’s enough. This is a battle of honor, isn’t it, North?”

“Yes! Phii Fah, don’t stop us.”

“You’re both drunk already.”

“What should we do?” Phii Jo asked.

“Just go along with what the younger ones want.”

“Okay,” Phii Jo responded, before he started mixing drinks for us to compete. I wasn’t sure why we were doing this, but at this point, my mind wasn’t very clear anymore, whatever, everything goes.    I downed my glass in one go, and North did the same. When I was younger and more rebellious, I used to drink a lot, which made me somewhat resilient to alcohol.

“You still want more?” North asked, his voice slurred.

“Yeah, you?”

“Chill, just saying.”

“Why can you drink so much?”

“Back then, I used to drink with the old man next door every day.”

“You’ve been an alcoholic since you were a kid?”

“Told you, since I was three.”

“You’re full of crap.”

“One more glass then,” we clinked our glasses together. I let the bitter-sweet taste flow down my throat one more time, before the image in front of me started to blur, but I could still see that North had passed out.

“…”

“Yay! I won!” Overjoyed at winning, I stood up and raised both my hands, but because I was drunk, I fell back down, only to be caught by Phii Fah.

“Yes, you’ve won,” Phii Fah said. Unable to fight the heaviness of my eyelids, I closed my eyes, “Let’s go home, Jo.”    “Yeah,” Phii Jo responded.

“Uh, Dao.”

“…”

“Dao,” I called out softly.

“Phoon is calling you,” Phii Fah said.

“Oh, what’s up, cat?”

“Foam?”

“His friend came to pick him up.”

“Uh, Dao, get back safely, okay?”

“Uh, okay, see you, congrats on winning.”

“Obviously,” I gave a thumbs up without looking, before feeling myself being lifted, hearing the sound of a car door opening, Phii Fah placed me on the seat and fastened my seatbelt. I let myself drift off to sleep until I felt myself being laid down on a familiar, soft bed.

“Uh…” I groaned in my throat when I felt uncomfortable.

“I will wipe you down in a bit,” he said.

“No, don’t leave,” I waved my hand around before my hand was grasped.

“I’m just going to get a cloth, be right back.”

“No. Don’t leave me.”

“…”

“No matter how good someone else might be, don’t leave me,” I mumbled in a slurred voice, trying to push myself up, but Phii Fah pulled me into a hug first.

“What are you talking about?”

“I don’t know.”

“Are you overthinking because you’re drunk?”

“I am not the best person, but I truly love you Phii Fah, loves you a lot, has loved you for a long time. No matter who comes along, I never cared, if it’s not you, it can’t be anyone else. Even if you don’t choose me, for me, it’s still only you Phii Fah.” “I know, I promised I wouldn’t go anywhere.” “Really?” I asked to confirm.

“Yes, so why are you overthinking now?” Phii Fah asked in a deep voice, then gently stroked my head.

“I saw…on a page.”

“A page?”

“Someone said that I am not right for you Phii Fah at all.”

“…Oh.”

“I don’t care how others see it, but I am afraid that one day someone more suitable for you than me might come along.” I spoke out what had been swirling in my head almost all day, trying not to think about it but unable to suppress the fear. I didn’t really want to voice it out because it might make me seem overly insecure, but with the alcohol coursing through my body, I ended up saying everything.

“Others have no right to decide who I am suitable for. I, Fah, will choose for myself who I want by his side.”

“…”

“And if that person isn’t you, then it can’t be anyone else.”

“…”

“As my partner, don’t look or pay attention to anyone else. Just look at me and that’s enough.”

“Uh, I only look at you. Didn’t you know?”

“I knew already.”

“I love you, more than anything in ten universes and a million galaxies!”

“Thank you, love you too.”

“…”

“The most in ten universes, a million galaxies.”

SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 38: Shining

   Tonfah

   After the short trip, celebrating Phoon’s birthday in Japan, which only lasted a few days, we returned to Thailand because we didn’t have much time. We had to continue studying. I think it must have been another good period for Phoon, not only did he get to see his mom but also travel with friends.

That day, after spending the whole day sightseeing and taking photos, riding the Ferris wheel, and ending with a celebratory meal at a restaurant, we returned to Thailand the next day. Phoon had been busy editing photos and the birthday video for several days, and he wouldn’t let me see it beforehand, saying he’d show it all once it was complete.

Looking at my watch, it’s now past ten at night, and today was another day with classes until late. I told Phoon to eat something first; believe me, it’s not a good feeling, not having time to even be together like this, especially when there are classes early tomorrow morning too.

I opened the door to the room slowly, set my bag down, and scanned the room for the person I missed all day. I saw Phoon slumped over the desk, asleep. I tiptoed over carefully so as not to wake him, opening the screen where he was editing the video. I couldn’t help but smile as I secretly saved everything he hadn’t closed before shutting down the computer. Then, I gently lifted him from the desk and laid him on the bed.

He must have been sitting in front of the computer all day until he was exhausted. I closed the bedroom curtains and turned on the bedside lamp before heading to the bathroom to shower and change. When I came out to check the kitchen counter, there were a couple of dishes wrapped in plastic, probably left by Phoon for me.

Because he’s just so sweet like this…

I unwrapped the plastic, heated up the food, served some rice, waited for the dishes to warm up, then had my dinner, and placed the dishes in the sink.

I peeked in to see if Phoon was sleeping soundly, and when I thought he was, I closed the bedroom door and went to make some coffee, preparing to study for the night.

In truth, my life before dating Phoon was quite ordinary and boring. Days were spent studying, nights reading, and then studying again the next day, with free time also dedicated to reading. It was just this cycle. But after having a boyfriend, some things changed, like bringing color to my otherwise mundane days.

I often study until late at night; it’s a habit I’ve had for a long time, even before getting into medical school, and now even more so. Usually, Phoon would sit and watch TV or listen to music on the sofa to keep me company while I studied until he fell asleep.

Actually, there’s something that’s been on my mind a lot lately, even before I took Phoon to Japan, because during the midterms, I didn’t perform well. I don’t know, can I call myself not good? I thought I had studied as hard as I could, but when it came to the actual exam, there were several questions I couldn’t answer.

That’s just how exams are. There’s no way you can answer everything given the difficulty and standards of the exams. The higher the year, the harder the subjects get, probably because I’ve never had so many unanswered questions before, which made me feel bad.    My scores were as expected; I knew from the exam that my marks would be around this level. Even though everyone said I did well, even the best among them, it still wasn’t good enough for myself.

It’s really hard to overcome this habit of putting too much pressure on myself, and when my parents said they thought I could do better, it only increased the pressure. They weren’t really pressuring me, but as I’ve said, it’s an expectation, thinking I should do better, believing I should be like this or that.

Sigh…thinking about it won’t change anything, better to focus on the present. I concentrated on the study sheet in front of me for over an hour until I had to rest my eyes from exhaustion, letting out a sigh as I felt tired.

I got up from the desk and walked to the storage shelf to look for old study sheets. While searching, I found an old cigarette pack.

Oh, I totally forgot about cigarettes. I haven’t smoked for months now, and I didn’t smoke often before, so I didn’t think about it much. When I picked up the pack, I saw there was a post-it note stuck on it with the message:

‘Don’t smoke often, I’m worried.’

   Typhoon

   I couldn’t help but smile when I saw the message on the post-it. Phoon must have found it while cleaning and thought I was still smoking, but he didn’t ask or say anything about it.

I peeled off the post-it and stuck it on the back of a notebook to keep before throwing away the cigarette pack. After finding the study sheets I needed, I went back to reading. Almost an hour later, I heard the bedroom door open slowly. I turned to see that the person who had been sleeping was now awake, rubbing his eyes sleepily as he walked towards me.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

“Yeah, what time is it?”

“Almost midnight.”

“Oh, I didn’t even know when you came back.”

“Today, I got back at ten in the evening, and I saw you slumped over the desk, asleep.”

“Oh, why didn’t you wake him up? I haven’t even showered yet; he’ll stink.”

“He seemed fine to me.”

“No, he should shower first,” Phoon said before going to grab his clothes and disappearing into the bathroom. He came out after about ten minutes in simple pajamas, “I’m up now.”    “How can you sleep after showering like that?”

“I’ll get sleepy soon. What time will you read until tonight?”

“Probably until about two in the morning.”

“Oh, then I will go back to editing the video. Phii Fah you didn’t peek, right?”    “No, I didn’t look.”

“Okay, don’t let me catch you cheating.”

“Yes, yes,” I couldn’t help but smile at the look on his face, “Give me some encouragement for studying, please.” My words made him slowly come closer, and he kissed my cheek.

“Susuna!”

“One more.”

“…” Phoon slightly frowned before leaning in and kissing my other cheek. When I said I wanted encouragement, I meant a kiss, but this was fine for now. I smiled contentedly, and Phoon walked away with a slightly red face, sitting back at the computer desk, putting on headphones to continue editing videos and photos.

…

Typhoon

   Having had a nap and a shower, I was now wide awake, focusing on video editing for a while. Then I remembered that tomorrow was the day the exam results would be announced, which made me anxious.

It’s five fifty-five now.

Just five more minutes!

I quickly opened the exam results website, but it was down, oh, damn it, it happens every year! I stood up in agitation, almost unable to sit still, trying to calm myself down when I noticed Phii Fah was seriously reading.

I refreshed the page while keeping an eye on the time, and as the seconds ticked by, I got more and more excited, feeling all tense!    My heart pounded intensely when I realized it was midnight, and while trying to load the website, my hands were shaking all over. I was so excited I could almost explode, but I had to stay quiet!

“Come on, load!” I whispered to myself. This ‘load’ meant the exam results, come on, load already! How long will this website take to load?

It’s loaded!

   I held my breath as the white website slowly loaded.

   I passed!!

   “Arghhhhh!!!” I accidentally shouted out loud, startling Phii Fah, who was reading and quickly turned to look at me.

“Phoon! What’s wrong?”

“Phii Fah, aaah!!!”

“Uh, what’s up?” Phii Fah quickly got up from his chair and came over to me.

“Uh, I, I, oh, argh, I passed, I passed, I got into the photography program, I passed!” I shouted with joy until it was almost incoherent. I looked at the website again for reassurance, and Phii Fah rushed to look at the screen too, showing signs of happiness as well.

“Congratulations~~” Not waiting for Phii Fah to finish, I jumped to hug him out of joy, unable to contain myself. Phii Fah looked a bit confused at being suddenly jumped on, but he quickly caught me.

   “I passed, oh, I, this…I!”

“That’s great, congratulations, I knew you could do it.”

“Thank you for believing in me, I did it! Yay!” Before Phii Fah gently set me down, I was nearly overwhelmed with joy. All the effort and studying for months wasn’t in vain; I finally got to study what I wanted! Phii Fah gently patted my head, looking at me with affection.

I grinned back at him immediately.

Now, I had to show off!

I quickly grabbed my phone to call everyone. The last person I chatted with on LINE was Ter. I called him right away. It wasn’t long before the call was answered.

“Ter!!”

(What!? Why are you so loud!)

   “Aren’t you asleep yet?”

(You bastard. Not just when calling out names, your voice cracks the whole sentence. Still watching Phii Hill read, and what?)

   “Me! Passed! Got in!”

(What?)

   “Passed, you asshole, got into Photo!”

(Holy shit, congrats, man, that’s great, let’s celebrate tomorrow.)

   “Yeah, we have to celebrate, can’t miss it now.”

(Yeah, yeah, so have you told anyone else yet?)

   “Not yet, you’re the first. I’ll call to brag to others now.”

(Heh. Nothing else, right?)

   “Nothing else. Just wanted to brag about passing.”

(Okay, good night then.)

   “Good night.”

I immediately scrolled through my chats to find Foam, calling him on LINE. He answered not long after. Of course, I called him with that cracking voice like I always do when I’m excited or upset, and he teased me about it. I told him about passing the exam, and he got really excited, congratulated me, and said we should celebrate together tomorrow, sounding just like Ter. We only talked for a bit before hanging up because he was actually sleeping and had to wake up to answer my call.

Then, it was North’s turn, I guess.

“Man, th-th-th!!”

(Why’s your voice cracking? What’s up?)

   “Aren’t you asleep yet?”

(-fuck, I’m playing games.)

   “I see. Didn’t know.”

(So, what’s up?)

   “Me! Passed! Got into! Pho! To! Now!”

(Really? Congrats, I knew you’d make it.)

   “Yeah, let’s celebrate tomorrow.”

(Okay, okay, we’ll plan it. I’m going to play some games now.)

   “Addicted to games. Not sleeping, huh?”

(Playing games while waiting for Phii Jo to finish studying.)

   “Oh, well, goodnight then.”

(Goodnight.)

   After hanging up with North, the last person to call was Daotok.

“Daotok!”

(…Your voice sounds excited, which means something must have happened.)

   “I passed the photo exam!” I didn’t shout as loudly as with the others because I didn’t want to yell at Daotok.

(Really? Wow, that’s great, congratulations. You’re a smart cat, no surprise there.)

   “Yeah, let’s celebrate tomorrow.”

(Celebrate?)

   “Yeah, are you coming? I’ve already made plans with everyone.”

(I probably won’t make it, sorry, I’ll give you a gift later.)

   “Why? Are you not free?”    (Well, yeah.)

   “Come on, Dao never comes to celebrations, come on, it’ll just be for a bit.”

(…)

   “Pleaaaase.”

(…Alright, then tell me the place. We’ll meet at the restaurant.)    “Okay! And why are you up so late? Don’t tell me you’re working again.”

(Then we won’t tell.)

   “So, you’re working, huh?”

(Yeah, yeah.)

   “Okay, okay, good luck. Sorry for bothering you, get some rest.”

(Yeah, sweet dreams, cat.)

   “Sweet dreams to you too.”

   And with that, the mission of calling everyone to brag, I mean, to share the good news about passing the exam, was complete. I turned back to smile broadly at Phii Fah, the joy still not fading.

   “I might even get honors, heh-heh.”

“Yes, you can do it.”

“I will do my best, as a student of yours, I won’t let my teacher down!” I said with a strong voice, making a respectful gesture, which made Phii Fah smile slightly at my antics.

“If you go to study, I will probably only be able to tutor you for free outside of school. But for photography and stuff like that, you should already be good at it.”

“Yes.” And with overwhelming joy, I hugged the person in front of me again. Phii Fah hugged me back.

Now I have done it, Fan.

   I’ll have to tell this good news to Mom, Aunt Nuan, and Aunt Prae too!

   …

Tonfah

   Today was supposed to be a day for the juniors to get together for a celebration; they had already booked a restaurant thinking everyone would be free on Saturday, but we ended up having make-up classes. So, I dropped Phoon off to hang out with his friends in the morning, thinking why not. We were supposed to go out for dinner together in the evening. Staying alone in the room in the morning would be quite boring.

   I dropped him off at the mall because Phoon said they might eat and watch a movie there, hoping they would stay at the mall and not go causing trouble anywhere else.

   It seems Phoon has noticed that I haven’t been feeling too great recently, so he’s been trying to stay close, being more affectionate.

Even though he’s usually quite clingy, it’s because Phoon knows I’ve been studying hard, and telling me not to stress out is something easier said than done. Normally, Phoon takes good care of me, from preparing meals, getting things ready, cleaning the room, doing everything he can.

   “Fah!”

“What?” I turned to ask a female friend who approached me during the break.

“Can you explain this part? No one in our group understands it.”    “Oh,” and then I explained the content to her, adjusting the professor’s words a bit to make it easier to understand.    “Oh, okay, thanks,” she said with a smile. I smiled back courteously, “Oh, Fah, is the person you post on Instagram really your boyfriend?”    “Yeah, why?”

“Nothing, he’s cute, is he your junior?”

“Yeah.”

“He’s really cute. We were just talking about how cute your boyfriend is, he’s so adorable.”

“Oh…thanks.”

“I want to meet him in person. What department is he in?”

“He’s about to enter the Photography program.”

“Oh, I’ll go check him out later, his Instagram is full of pictures of you.”

I didn’t say anything, just smiled, before she talked a bit more and then walked away.

“Jo,” I called out to the person sitting next to me.

“What?”

“Have people ever complimented North on being cute?”

“Sometimes, why?”

“Do you like it?”

“No.”

“Then it’s not weird, right?”

“I don’t know,” Jo said, “The point isn’t whether it’s weird or not, the point is I don’t like it.”

“Hmm,” I let out a small sigh. Even though I wasn’t too pleased with people complimenting Phoon like that, when I thought about it, isn’t it good that people think my boyfriend is cute? They’re just complimenting, it doesn’t mean anything more.

If just seeing a photo makes people say Phoon is cute, does that mean when Phoon enters the new faculty, there will be even more people?

   “Hill,” I called out.

“What?”

“When Phoon was studying vet science, did a lot of people like him?”

“…Why suddenly ask?” Hill raised an eyebrow, looking slightly puzzled, “Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Uh, Ter told me there were quite a few, both seniors and peers.”

“Quite a few?”

“Uh, that’s what I heard.”

“How many people?”

“Don’t know.”

“How did they flirt?”

“Don’t know.”

“And what did Phoon say?”

“He probably rejected them.”

“Probably? Why probably?”

“…”

“Were they just flirting, not chasing him aggressively, right?”

“No, they didn’t.”

“Well, that’s good,” I sighed in relief. Even though it’s in the past, if someone had done something bad to Phoon, I would definitely feel uneasy.

“When he enters Photo, there will probably be people liking him again,” Hill said.

“Yeah,” I shrugged slightly, not too concerned.

“People are looking at your boyfriend, do you like it?”

“I don’t like it, but what does it matter if they look?”

“…”

“Phoon only looks at me, that’s all.”

“Fuck, that’s really annoying,” Jo said, bursting into laughter, making me laugh too, “So, you’re saying Phoon loves you a lot?”

“No. Not saying that, but it’s true.” I teased them just for fun, and indeed, they got annoyed.

“A new level of bragging,” Arthit teased, “I thought Hill and Jo were annoying enough, but you, Fah, take the cake.”

“And what about you, Arthit? Don’t you have anything to brag about?” I countered.    “Huh? Me?”

“Yeah. Nothing?”

“How could there be?”

“Someone you’re talking to?”

“My dad still doesn’t talk to me these days.”

“Hasn’t he unblocked you on LINE yet?” Jo asked, laughing.    “Yeah, tell my dad to unblock me on LINE, you have his LINE, right?”

“Yeah, yeah, my friend’s situation is pitiful.”

SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 37: His cat

   Tonfah

   I glanced at the person walking ahead with happiness, Phoon in the white winter jacket I once bought for him, black jeans, and black sneakers. He might not notice it much himself, but Phoon usually dresses in black almost every day, so seeing him in white was a bit different but fitting.

It seems like the person who just got a new camera is very excited, especially since it’s Phoon. So, I didn’t have any other gift ideas besides the camera; it’s the one thing that the little one loves to the point of obsession, no matter how many cameras or lenses he has, it wouldn’t be enough.

Just like how I’m obsessed with Typhoon’s smile right now, his large, bright eyes blending perfectly with the morning air. I’ve heard that when people are with something they love deeply, they have a charm. I only understood this when I saw Phoon with his camera. I never thought someone could love photography this much. Whether it’s lifting the camera to shoot, checking the photos, or even editing them, it’s all captivating.

We were at Osaka Castle, the first place the younger ones said we had to visit, and it was fortunate because it was spring, and the cherry blossoms were in full bloom.

It was all so beautiful. From the pink cherry blossoms lining the path to the child with a big smile on his face with the camera in hand.    The gentle breeze blew, and the sweet-faced owner turned towards me, the same camera stopping in front of my face. The photographer paused for a moment before pressing the shutter. After taking the photo, Phoon lowered the camera and looked at the screen.

“How is it?” I asked.

“Take a look,” Phoon said before quickly approaching me, handing me the camera to see the picture he had just taken. It was a full-body shot of me standing in the middle of the path with cherry trees on both sides, with a few people walking in the background and sides, but the focus was solely on me.

It’s well known that this photographer takes the most beautiful pictures.

“What do you think?”

“The model is clear as day.”

“Anyone standing here would look good with this kind of shot.”

“That’s not true,” Phoon shook his head slightly, “It’s also because of the model. Since you are tall, the full-body shot looks good like this.”

“Hmm,” I raised my eyebrows a bit. I’m not one to compliment myself much, but I’m not completely lacking in confidence either, “If you say so.”

“Uh, you don’t often compliment yourself, huh?” The person next to me said playfully.

“Phoon is the same,” I replied, and he gave a broad smile.

“One more photo, please.”

“What should I do?” I asked because when Phoon takes photos of me, I usually don’t know what to do. It’s not just when Phoon takes photos; I generally don’t like having my picture taken, so I don’t know much about these things.

“Hmm, just walk normally,” Phoon said.

“Okay,” I agreed, then Phoon circled around to the back.

“Turn around a bit, but don’t look at the camera.”

“Then what should I look at?”

“Look…you can look at North.”

“Johan would have something to say about that.”    “Phii Jo won’t know,” he said.

I didn’t respond, instead, I turned to the side, looking at the cherry blossom trees. As the wind blew, my hair fluttered with it. After a moment, thinking it was enough, I turned to look at Phoon. Since the wind was blowing, I had to push my hair back to keep it from covering my face, before Phoon took another three rapid shots.

   “Wow, that’s beautiful,” the photographer said excitedly, quickly showing me the photos, “Phii Fah could be a model, really.”    “I’d rather not,” I smiled.

“Phoon,” I turned along with Phoon when we heard the call; it was Ter and Hill approaching. Now, all of us were out sightseeing together, except for Arthit, who never likes going anywhere with others, especially not with this group; he’s definitely not going to join, preferring to go off alone for a long time. I just hoped he wouldn’t forget the time we were supposed to meet back for our return to Thailand.

“How’s it going? Did you find any beautiful spots?” Phoon asked Ter. These two really get along well when it comes to photography, both enjoying it, but Ter doesn’t take it as seriously.

“That spot wasn’t bad, especially with the cherry blossoms.”

“Oh, just from this direction,” Phoon said, showing Ter the photos. The one who just saw them looked slightly amazed, “What do you think?”

“Stunning,” Ter said, “You should check this out first,” before showing Phoon his own camera.

“Hey, did you secretly take a picture of me?”

“It turned out nice, right, Phii Fah?” Then Ter showed me some pictures, ones he took of me and Phoon from not too far away, when we were walking together, smiling at each other while Phoon was taking my photo, “Here’s another behind-the-scenes shot.”

“It’s beautiful,” I answered, “Can you send it to me?”

“Sure,” Ter smiled. I like the pictures Ter took of me and Phoon. I can’t really put it into words, but they look natural, and I especially like how Phoon smiles when I’m not looking, that smile when he’s not focusing on the camera.

If he’s going to smile this cutely while taking pictures,    I wouldn’t want him to take photos of anyone else.

“The cherry blossoms are damn beautiful,” I said to Ter as the two of us walked slightly ahead of Phii Hill and Phii Fah, heading to capture the scenery around Osaka Castle. The soft sunlight slightly changed the tone of the photos, but I like it when the sun is out; for me, the pictures turn out even prettier.

I wanted to secretly take many photos of Phii Fah, but that would be difficult since he would notice even the slightest attempt.

I took a lot of landscape photos, especially of the cherry blossoms in full bloom, with angles looking up to the sky, making them look even more beautiful.

Walking along, I saw a moat around the castle with ducks in it, which I thought were cute, so I couldn’t help but stop to take photos.    “You can’t take pictures of everything, Phoon. We haven’t even reached the castle yet,” Ter said.

“Yeah, we’ve been here for almost twenty minutes, right?”    “Yeah, if you keep going like this, we won’t have time to see much, probably won’t even go inside.”

“Hmm,” I pouted in frustration before turning back when I felt someone approaching, “How are they?” I asked North, who had just arrived. Earlier, while taking photos with Phii Fah, I saw him not too far away.

“Looks good, the cherry blossoms are in perfect bloom, we’re damn lucky.”

“Aren’t you taking any photos?” Ter asked.

“I’m not good at it, I’ll just take the ones from you guys.”

“As expected, here, I secretly took some of you and Phii Jo too,” Ter said, showing the pictures from his camera to North, who immediately raised his eyebrows in curiosity.

“When did you sneak the photo?”

“It was slick, I could be a paparazzo,” Ter said with pride, especially since he had just sneakily taken a photo of me and Phii Fah, and it turned out to be a beautiful shot.

“Doctoring isn’t your thing anymore, huh?” North said.    “Yeah, I quit. Next time you’re sick, you won’t be able to come to me.”

“Damn, Ter,” and North gave Ter a piece of his mind. I glanced back at the three doctors chatting behind us. The scene before me seemed like something out of a movie, and I couldn’t resist lifting the camera hanging around my neck to take a picture. Of course, they must have noticed.

Maybe because they’re used to being photographed secretly.    Phii Fah looked at me, raising an eyebrow slightly. I made a face before lowering the camera.

   “Pretend you didn’t see,” I said with a pout; how could someone notice they’re being photographed secretly like that?

“Oh, okay,” Phii Fah laughed, then nudged Phii Jo and Phii Hill to act like they didn’t know. The other two looked slightly surprised before agreeing to play along, turning back to their conversation as before.

“How did you manage to sneak that shot, Ter?” I asked after I had taken photos of the three of them, scrolling through the images I’d just captured. I must say, they really are attractive, all three of them, even more so when they stand together like this, drawing everyone’s gaze.

No wonder it’s not just us looking at them right now.

“You have to do it when Phii Fah or Phii Jo are with you guys. They won’t pay attention to anything else then,” Ter said, making me feel a bit embarrassed, “But trying to sneak a photo any other time, you won’t get away with it.”

“Yeah, that’s true, I’ve never succeeded in catching Phii Jo off guard in a photo. He always knows. I don’t know why he’s so perceptive.”

“Maybe because he gets photographed a lot,” I said, “I’ve seen on the university page, there are many candid shots of him, right? While

Phii Fah and Phii Hill act like they don’t see it, Phii Jo mocks the camera with a smile.”

Speaking of the university page reminded me, because I’m not much into social media, only using it to keep in touch with friends. But after dating Phii Fah, he became somewhat of a celebrity at the university, even being the runner-up for the month. People comment a lot about us, but I don’t read them because I’m lazy, yet I want to say that the candid photos of Phii Fah are terrible, the angles are bad, and they’re even blurry!

I’m not angry because someone photographed Phii Fah secretly.

But if I knew who it was, I’d teach them how to take proper photos!

“Why are you making a cat face?”

“Huh, what cat?”

“When you’re sulky, you make a cat face, Phoon,” Ter explained, continuing from what North had just asked. I immediately looked at them with a surprised expression, “Like when you frown and squint your eyes, making a pouty face.”    “You mean me?” I pointed at myself.

“Yes, you, I’m talking to you.”

“No way, that’s impossible,” I shook my head rapidly, narrowing my eyes at them.

“You look even more like a cat now.”

“Enough,” I said to stop the teasing about me looking like a cat, before noticing a bridge ahead which probably led into the castle area. It was really a vast castle, making me tired from all the walking, and when we reached the bridge, I couldn’t help but stop to take more pictures.

“You’re so excited,” North teased.

“Of course, it’s a new camera, you bastard, I’ve gone mad over it.

This camera cost two hundred thousand! Who would’ve thought Phii Fah would buy it as a birthday gift? It’s the most expensive and best gift I’ve ever gotten, look at this…” I noticed Phii Jo watching.    “Stop,” North raised his hand to stop me, “I’m getting a headache from hearing you brag about your camera.”

“Come on, I’m just excited.”

“Yeah, yeah, my bad. I won’t tease anymore, go ahead and take your photos.”

“North, be a model for me.”

“Me?”

“Yeah, you. Phii Fah said it doesn’t matter who the model is,” I repeated what Phii Fah had told me earlier.

“What does he know? Do you think if it wasn’t him in that photo, it would have turned out that good?” North said with a slightly annoyed look but still agreed to stand by the bridge to be my model, “How should I pose?”

“Just act normal,” I said. Soon, North turned to smile at the camera. I searched for the right angle for a while before taking the shot, not realizing that the seniors had been standing behind me for who knows how long. North looked a bit embarrassed.

Come to think of it, Ter also often gets embarrassed around Phii Hill.

“I’m shy, or are the doctors just good at making me shy?

I think it’s the latter, because if it weren’t for Phii Fah, I wouldn’t get shy at all.

“Did you get a lot of photos?” Phii Fah asked. I nodded in response before stepping closer to show him the photos on the camera. It’s become a habit to show Phii Fah my photos first whenever I take any. “I like the one with the duck,” I said, pointing to the duck by the canal we just passed, then scrolling through until I reached the photo of the three doctors walking and chatting. This made Phii Fah raise an eyebrow slightly, “Why?”

“Nothing. Just that we don’t usually have photos together.”    “Let me see,” Phii Jo walked over. I handed him the camera, “Hill, look at this.”

“What?” Phii Hill asked, turning around.

“Our photo.”

“Come to think of it, we never go out together,” Phii Hill said to Phii Jo after seeing the photo.

“Yeah. Normally, these are candid shots, ah, but this one’s candid too. Didn’t even notice,” Phii Fah teased me a bit, which made me inadvertently frown at him.

“If Phii Arthit was here, it would be complete,” I said, “Why didn’t he come with us?”

“He’s not one for going out with a lot of people,” Phii Fah explained, “Especially when traveling, he prefers going alone.”

“Oh,” I nodded in understanding. Seems like he really values his freedom, huh, Phii Arthit. After spending some time taking photos at the bridge, I was suddenly holding hands with Phii Fah because I was too busy taking photos to notice everyone else had moved ahead.

Let’s sneak a photo of Ter and Phii Hill. That’s revenge for them taking candid shots of everyone else.

“We need to hurry a bit, because according to our plan, we’ve got several more places to go, right?” Phii Fah asked with a smile. I nodded in response, one hand still holding his, making me feel both shy and warm at the same time.

I remembered last time, when we held hands like this while sightseeing.

Going out with more people does make me tense, especially because of Ter and North; I still remember being teased about…about the morning kiss.

I picked up the camera with my free hand to take a photo of our joined hands, then slowly moved the camera up to capture the person next to me, up close, and seeing that Phii Fah wasn’t looking at the camera made me think…    Switch to video mode instead.

   “Phii Fah,” I called out, and the owner of the name slowly turned around just as a gentle breeze blew by.

“What is it?”

“I want to record a video.”

“What kind of video?”

“It’s a birthday memory of me in Osaka with you Phii Fah.”

“Oh,” before a beautiful smile gradually spread across his handsome face. I believe if that shot just now was edited into slow motion, it would definitely be amazing. “Are you going to edit it?”

“Yes.”

Phii Fah raised the hand that was holding mine, touching his lips to the back of my hand and glancing at the camera. At such close range, it made me freeze as if my heart had stopped for a moment, and when I came to my senses, my heart started beating strongly.

   “Don’t cut this part out, okay?”

“…Okay,” I said in a faint voice. The other seemed satisfied before lowering his hand. I stopped recording the video for now. If I included the shot where Phii Fah kissed my hand in the video…

It would look very sweet.

There’s no way I would cut that part out during editing because it’s our memory, after all.

Before we headed up to Osaka Castle, looked at the view from the top of the castle, we didn’t stay long before descending and planning to go elsewhere.

“Takoyaki!” Ter turned to see a takoyaki stall and spoke with interest. Of course, he was the first to rush over, followed immediately by Phii Hill.

“What are they doing?” North asked me.

“Probably eating, they must have walked by and smelled it,” I said, unable to suppress a chuckle.

“But it looks good, the original from Japan is like this.”

“Original again,” I hadn’t finished speaking when North followed Ter.

“Aren’t you going to buy any?”

“I am not hungry,” I turned to respond to Phii Fah.

“You can try some, eat a lot, come on, didn’t your mom say to eat more because you’re too skinny?” Phii Fah’s words forced me into the takoyaki shop, even though I thought I’d been eating a lot lately. But my mom still says I’m too thin.

After buying some, I poked one with a stick, blew on it, thinking it was cool enough, and tried it. It was delicious, but then I felt a sharp pain in my mouth.

“What’s wrong? Does your mouth hurt?”

“…” I didn’t respond, inadvertently frowning at him; the pain was from where my mouth had cracked that morning. I wanted to be sulky but decided to let it go. Better not to mention it. “Try it, Phii Fah, it’s really tasty.”

“Feed me one.”

I poked another piece of takoyaki and blew on it to cool it down before feeding it to Phii Fah. After we finished eating, we prepared to move on to another place.

“Hey,” Ter nudged me and showed me a photo on the camera, one where I was about to feed takoyaki to Phii Fah.

“Sneak photo again.”

“Is it nice? Phii Fah looks so handsome even with his mouth open to eat takoyaki.”

“Phii Hill will take it down later.”

“Phii Hill won’t mind.”

“Really?” I asked incredulously, thinking Ter shouldn’t be sulking if he gets scolded by Phii Hill. Then we continued walking to a nearby place where they sold goods. While we were buying ice cream, I noticed Phii Jo buying beer.

Come to think of it, I’ve never seen Phii Fah drink.

“Do you usually drink?”

“Beer?”

“Yes. Like, alcoholic drinks?”

“Not really. I don’t like them much.”

“Oh,” I nodded, thinking it wasn’t that surprising.

“What about you Phoon?”

“Huh, me? No, not anymore.”

“Didn’t you tell me that you used to drink a lot before?”

“Oh, that was a long time ago, back when I was rebellious,” I said, thinking back to those days when I was a naughty kid who often ran away from home, fought with Fan, and behaved badly while drinking with friends, “But now I don’t touch it at all.”

“That’s good, but if you feel like drinking, let Phii Fah know.”

“Will you drink with me?”

“No, I’ll keep an eye on you.”

“I can take care of myself, you know. When drinking.”

“I’m still worried,” Phii Fah said in a calm tone as if it were just a casual statement, but for me, it felt quite special. I couldn’t help but smile secretly when I heard that.

Initially, we had planned to go to the aquarium, but we thought it would be more beautiful at night because they have a light show. During the day, we decided to walk around and look at various things, then visit a temple to pray and make merit instead.

In the evening, we arrived at the pier where there’s the aquarium and a giant Ferris wheel. The first thing that caught my eye was the

Ferris wheel. From the information I gathered, it’s open until late. So, we headed to the aquarium first.

“Hey, what’s up?” I asked when I noticed Phii Fah kept looking at me.

“Nothing, just that you look so excited.”

“I am excited.”

“That’s good.”

The two of us held hands as we walked further in. The front of the aquarium indeed had the light display as I had read about, with a plaza full of blue lights giving the feeling that we were underwater or at the icy poles with the cold air and strong winds.

   Before we could look around more, the highlight was penguins walking along the path with a guard. Of course, I didn’t miss the chance to take a photo right there.

   “Looks familiar, ah, but I can’t remember what kind of penguin it is.”

“Emperor,” Phii Fah answered. I nodded slightly before turning my attention back to the little one in front, not forgetting to record a video. Today, I’ve got plenty of footage to edit for my birthday video in Osaka.

Walking inside, I found that it was decorated with the same color lighting as outside, in a blue tone, dark blue. The ceiling was full of bright blue lights, making it feel like we were under the deep sea. Even with the blue lights, the darkness inside made it hard to clearly see the person beside me.

While Phii Fah was scanning the surroundings, I took the opportunity to capture him, who was absorbed in the beautiful ambiance around us.

Looking through the lens, I realized that no matter what lighting, he always looked captivating.

“Can I borrow your camera for a moment?”

“Sure, are you going to take photos?”

“Yes, it’s so beautiful, I want to capture it.” Hearing that, I took off the camera and handed it to him. Without the camera in my hands, I started looking around, but when I saw Phii Fah holding the camera and taking photos, I paused.

I’ve noticed many times before, whenever Phii Fah holds a camera, he looks really good.

I wanted to take a photo of that moment, but I didn’t have my camera with me.

Wait…

“Phii Fah, are you taking photos of me?”

“Yes.”

“But didn’t you say you were going to take photos around here?”    “When did I say that? I just said it was so beautiful I wanted to capture it.”

“Then take the photos.”

“I am taking them.”

“…”

I froze when I understood what he meant. Saying it was so beautiful he wanted to capture it and then only taking photos of me meant he was talking about me, right? Realizing that, I protested to cover my embarrassment.

“Is this revenge?”

“Not at all, you don’t usually like taking photos of yourself, right?”

“Yes.”

“So, Phii Fah will take the photos instead. It would be such a pity if we didn’t capture this beauty.”

Phii Fah’s words left me speechless for a moment, then he handed the camera back to me. I took the camera and quickly looked at the photos, finding both moments when I was distracted, staring around, and when I turned to complain to the camera.

“Don’t delete them, okay?”

“Ugh.”

I pouted playfully; Phii Fah had taken really beautiful photos. Not because I was in them, but because of the angles and everything else in the shots, overall, they were very good.

We walked into the underwater tunnel, and somehow, we had gotten separated from the others. I didn’t know when, maybe from the entrance.

“Phii Fah, do you see the others?”

“We got separated at the entrance.”

“Oh, I didn’t even realize.”

“When you were looking at the penguins.”

“Oh, that’s bad, what should we do?”

“We can call them later when we’re back. It’ll be hard to find them now.”

“Okay.”

We continued through the underwater tunnel to the Japanese forest zone, which was like an ecosystem simulation. I took lots of cute animal photos, then we moved to the marine animal tanks. I didn’t know how long I spent in there, but by the time I realized it, I had seen everything. It seemed like it took quite a while, but Phii Fah didn’t complain, waiting patiently until I had taken enough photos.

“Was it fun?” Phii Fah asked after we left the aquarium. Outside, it was now completely dark. I checked the time; it was almost ten at night.

“Yes, the decorations were very beautiful.”

“Shall we go on the Ferris wheel?”

“Yes!” I said excitedly once more when I realized we were about to get on the Ferris wheel. I told you it was the first thing that caught my eye. After waiting in line for just a short while, we got into the gondola. I sat down, and Phii Fah sat opposite me. With the darkness, the view around us looked incredibly beautiful.

I gazed at the view outside as we gradually ascended, the lights below illuminating Osaka Bay, bridges visible in the distance. Since the Ferris wheel was so high, it felt like we could see the whole city of Osaka.

“Thank you for bringing me here.”

“Thank you again.”

“Really, thank you. Today was so much fun. I never thought I’d get to hang out with you and everyone, and get so many memorable photos and videos,” I said, turning to meet the eyes of the person sitting opposite me, only to find he was already looking at me.

With the dim light from below, I wasn’t so afraid of the darkness I was experiencing. Especially with Phii Fah here, there was nothing to be scared of. I reached out and held his hand, looking into those beautiful eyes with a heart beating strongly, filled with love for this person and gratitude beyond words.

“Have you ever thought about it, Phii Fah?”

“What?”

“About having a boyfriend, what it would be like.”

“Never,” he said softly, with a warm smile on his handsome face. “Why not?”

“Before, when I was alone, it was okay. I didn’t pay attention to anyone.”

“Really? Even though so many people like you, Phii Fah.”

“Well, I don’t like any of them.”

“But you like me, that’s strange.”

“Why?”

“…”

“Honestly, there are so many better people than me.”

“But there’s only one you, Phoon.”

“Then let me ask back, there are plenty of people better than me, why don’t you like them?”

“It’s been you from the start.”

“Phoon you is the type of person I like. If you showed me his true self, I would probably fall in love with you easily, maybe even from several years ago.”

“My true self…” I repeated his words, nodding to show I understood well, because I had asked Phii Fah once when we first started dating. I had never truly shown my real self to Phii Fah before that, “Who would dare?”    “Why not?”

“If I showed that I liked you and you rejected me, that would be bad.”

“But I didn’t reject you, did I?”

“Right, but because there was the letter, I got the courage. Back then, I was so scared that you wouldn’t be okay with me being the person from the letter,” I said truthfully.

“That’s good then. No matter what, as long as I got to know the real you, that’s enough.”

“What if I ran away back then, at the bridge?” I asked, referring to when Phii Fah asked me out.

“I told you, we would go back to where you feel comfortable, no matter how long it takes.”    “No matter how long? One year?”

“Yes.”

“Two years?”

“Yes.”

“Five years?”

“Yes.”

“Then, ten years?”

“Yes.”

“Wow, aren’t you exaggerating?”

“No, because back then, I decided that no matter what, it had to be you. As long as we could still talk like that, no matter how many years it took, while I finished his studies, worked as a doctor in the hospital,

I would come back to write letters to talk with you like before.”    “…Wow,” because those earnest eyes made me realize.

I was stunned because it made me understand that Phii Fah wasn’t lying at all.

“Phii Fah you could rush me, you know. You had the right not to be okay with the situation back then. Why didn’t you demand anything?” I said in a soft voice, feeling like something was stuck in my throat.

“But I am okay with it, why demand anything?”

“…” I pressed my lips together, feeling my heart swell with emotion. I let silence envelop us for a while because I didn’t know what to say to break this silence, until I remembered I hadn’t recorded a video. I started recording the night view of Osaka from over a hundred meters high, the colorful lights making me gaze in awe for a long time.

“Do you like the view from here?”

“Yeah, I love it, I want to come again.”

“When we come to visit your mom, we’ll come again.”

“Really, you promised,” I said, emphasizing it, and the other laughed a little.

“I already take you everywhere,” said the person opposite me, “In fact, I want to bring you out more often too, but Phii Fah doesn’t really have the time.”

“It’s okay.”

“…”

“I’m sorry for not having much time, even though I promised to take good care of you,” what Phii Fah said likely referred to the recent times when he was busy with studies and exams. He’s been studying hard, so it’s not surprising he doesn’t have much time. In fact, Phii Fah seemed somewhat worried about not having enough time for me.

   I shook my head immediately.

   “It’s really okay.”

“…”

“Besides, having a boyfriend who’s going to be a doctor isn’t bad.”    I said with a broad smile, and the other reached out to pinch my cheek lightly, with a playful grin.

“Besides, you have been taking good care of me too.”

“Really?”

“Wow, honestly, despite studying hard, Phii Fah you still do so much for me, and I’m very grateful,” I said. Actually, you take care of me too well. No matter where we go or what we do, I hardly have to do anything myself. Even during exam times when he was tired, he still tried to come see me, “Phoon should be the one taking care of you. I haven’t done much for you.”

“Being a good kid is enough.”

“I am a good kid. Never been rebellious.”

“Then who was it that brought coffee while I was studying, late at night, told to wait in the room but didn’t listen, and still came alone by car?”

“That’s right. Who knows,” I pretended, because when Phii Fah was studying outside. Initially, Phii Fah told me to wait in the room because he would study until the morning, so I wouldn’t have to go through trouble if I came to wait, but I stubbornly took coffee to him and ended up staying to keep watch.

I remember it was late that night, yet I still stubbornly went by car to find Phii Fah. Of course, I got scolded a lot for it. After that, Phii Fah didn’t let me stay in the room alone anymore because he didn’t trust me not to sneak out again.

Come to think of it, I’m quite clingy to Phii Fah like a leech.

“Must be a cat, then, number one in stubbornness.”

“Not stubborn.”

“Cats are stubborn.”

“Not a cat. Not stubborn either.”

“Cat.”

“Yes?”

“You just said you’re not a cat, why do you answer when I call you a cat?”

“Oh,” I frowned slightly, it’s just that I’m used to being called like that by them, “Fine, I’m a cat, but not stubborn.”

“Still stubborn.”

“Is that stubborn?”

“Hmm.”

“Phii Fah you always says I am stubborn, is I really that stubborn?”

“Not really. Just with this matter.”

“…Oh.”

“Feeling upset?”

“No. Just asking, if I’m too stubborn to the point where it’s bad, then I’ll adjust.”

“It’s fine, you being yourself is good enough.”

“Alright,” I smiled broadly at him, I wasn’t actually upset, I meant what I said.

“No matter how stubborn, you’re still my cat,” Phii Fah said while gently ruffling my hair.

“Hehe, this cat is very loyal, even dogs can’t compete.”

“Really?”

“Really, if I were a cat, and cats really have nine lives, I would give all nine lives to you, Phii Fah.”

“Hmm? All of them?”

“All of them, give everything, even stuff it into your hands,” I said with a slight chuckle.

“Okay, then Phii Fah will gladly accept them all.”

“…“

I love these moments when we talk like this. It might seem insignificant, but it’s sweet to me.

   Before I knew it, it was time to get off the Ferris wheel. Phii Fah called the others to meet up around here.

   “Where are we going next?” Phii Fah asked.

“To celebrate your birthday. I’ve looked at some places,” I answered while we were walking around Osaka Bay. Seeing our two shadows stretching ahead, I thought of something, and immediately took out my phone to take a picture.

I posted a photo of our two shadows walking together on Instagram.

With the caption:

‘You Have All My 9 Lives’

  SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME 

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 36: Typhoon’s Day

   Tonfah

   “You did it on purpose.”

“What?” I asked Jo while we were in the supermarket. Hill and Ter were selecting other items. Meanwhile, Jo and I were keeping an eye on North and Phoon choosing fish.

“You’re not slick.”

“Really? That’s too bad.”

“It’s fun seeing Phoon get embarrassed.”

“He’s cute when he’s embarrassed.”

“Yeah, so how was yesterday?”

“It was good. I don’t think there’s anything to worry about anymore.”

“Good.” Jo said this, though his face didn’t show any emotion, indicating he was somewhat irritated. I guessed it was because he had to wake up early.

“Why do you have to make such a scary face?”

“You’re sleepy, aren’t you?”

“I am sleepy, but I was sleeping, and you made Phoon get out of bed.” I said, turning to look at him, “Who came up with the idea to cook?”

“Ter.”

“Oh, but Hill…” I said only that and looked past Jo to where Hill was talking with Ter on the other side, “just sleeping would have been enough.”

“He’s not human, that bastard.”

“And has Arthit woken up yet?”

“Don’t know, if he hasn’t, he might as well be dead.”

Because after we finished the exams, we rushed straight to Japan. At first, we didn’t think they would come along, but it seemed North and Ter wanted to join, so they had to come. The state of medical students who had just finished their exams wasn’t exactly great.

“I never thought I’d do so much for someone,” I said, and the person next to me turned to look at me with a slightly surprised expression.

“What do you mean?”

“Normally, when I do something for others, I do it only to the extent I want to. But for Phoon, I never thought I’d do something like this. I brought him to Japan even though I hadn’t slept more than eight hours last week, yet I still managed to drive, and I didn’t even think about complaining.”

“Yeah, that’s really strange.”

I turned to look at Phoon, who seemed to be getting teased by North. His face and ears were red, sneaking glances at me. Once I looked back, he averted his gaze, then lightly hit North several times.

   “He hit him again,” I said, glancing at the person next to me.

“North said when Phoon is embarrassed, he uses force.”

“Yeah, I get hit a lot too,” I said. There have been many times when Phoon, in his embarrassment, would hit my arm or chest, but it doesn’t hurt; it’s like a cat’s strength. He’d turn red and threaten to hit, but who would be scared of that?

I don’t know if it’s because of his fair skin that he turns red easily; sometimes just touching him makes him blush.

   Speaking of last night, around midnight, I woke up with Phoon still in my arms, his unique scent filling the air. I’ve told Phoon that I like it, but he probably doesn’t know that it’s made me lose control several times.

   I wonder if Phoon has noticed the marks on his neck that have increased since last night; if he hasn’t noticed yet, that’s good. Otherwise, he might sulk again.

   “Phii Fah,” Phoon called me with a sweet voice. I turned towards the sound immediately.

Phoon has been calling me like this for a long time, but after we started dating, I really enjoy hearing him call my name.

“Yes?”

“Shall we make tonkatsu?”

“What about the fish?”

“I don’t want to anymore, I think I can’t cut the fish.”    “Okay,” I smiled back before we went to choose ingredients for tonkatsu instead. It didn’t take long to buy everything, and we returned to the hotel. Somehow, everyone had agreed to use my room for cooking, which I didn’t mind because I knew that the others’ rooms were definitely off-limits. They’re the type that doesn’t like anyone messing with their personal space.

We sat waiting on the sofa because we weren’t allowed to help.

Actually, I wanted to help, but Phoon wouldn’t let me, so I had to sit with Hill and Jo.

“Is today Phoon’s birthday?” Hill asked as soon as I sat down on the sofa.

“Yeah.”

“I don’t have a gift, but if you want me to buy something, just tell me.”

“It’s probably fine.”

“Birthdays are always a problem,” Jo grumbled, “Let’s ask North later.”

“Did you buy anything?” Hill turned to ask. I nodded in response,

“Any surprise?”

“I’m not good at that kind of thing,” I replied, “I’ll just give the usual gift.”

“What did you buy?” Jo asked.

“A camera, I saw Phoon wanted one. Phoon didn’t tell me, but I noticed he was looking up information on them quite a bit, so I decided to buy it as a birthday gift.”    “What kind of camera?” Jo asked.

“I don’t know, I showed a picture to the store clerk.”

“How much?”

“Over two hundred thousand.”

“Hmm. Not surprising, you’re that into him,” Jo said, raising his eyebrows at Hill, “We’ve been talking about watching you. At first, you teased us quite a bit.”

“How are things going now, Tonfah?” Hill asked.

“It’s no different from you guys. If Phoon says sun is rising in the west, I’d believe it,” I said, chuckling slightly.

“What does science matter anymore? Just believing your wife is enough,” Jo said, laughing as well.

“It’s good, you look more like a human now,” Hill said.

“Like a human? Wasn’t I one before?”

“You look like a normal person. At first, we were worried that your kindness would backfire and hurt you and Phoon, but seeing you now, it seems fine. Do you still keep in touch with the students you tutored?” Hill asked. I shook my head in response. Before, Hill and Jo used to complain about my kindness, especially towards the younger students with darker skin, but now I don’t tutor anyone anymore. “Who else am I supposed to tutor? I don’t even have time to sleep.

If I have time, I’d rather spend it with Phoon.”

“I’m really proud of you, Tonfah,” Johan said, but before anyone could say more, there was a knock at the door. I went to open it and found Arthit, who had just woken up, still yawning.

“Hey, are you guys cooking up a storm?”

“Yeah, come in,” I had messaged Arthit to come to my room if he woke up since we were planning to cook breakfast ourselves. Arthit followed me into the room and sat on the sofa, looking sleepy.

“So, where’s the food?”

“It’s not done yet.”

“Your wives made it?” Arthit raised his eyebrows, trying to blink away his sleepiness. I nodded in response, “Oh, and what were you guys doing?”

“Just chatting,” Johan answered, “Oh, this morning, Fah gave Phoon a morning kiss in front of us.” Hearing this, Arthit immediately looked surprised.

“Huh? Really, Tonfah, you did that?” Before I could answer, Arthit continued, “So, you’ve become another one of those wife-addicts, huh? I’m really fed up, all of you are blind with love.”    “Well, you don’t have one,” Johan said.

“That’s good,” Hill spoke up, “Arthit is better off without one, I feel sorry for him.”

“Tch,” Arthit grumbled softly in annoyance.

Before we could talk any further, the food was brought out. Mine and Phoon’s was tonkatsu, just as Phoon had asked when we went shopping. Ter and North had made different dishes for Johan and Hill.

   “Hey, where’s mine?” Arthit asked, noticing there was no food for him.

“Oh, I didn’t know you were coming,” North answered, “I’ll go get you some more.”

“Arthit, go get it yourself,” Johan commanded.

“Yeah,” Arthit said before getting up to leave. Meanwhile, we started our breakfast. Phoon seemed eager, watching as I took my first bite. Truth be told, I think Phoon is actually quite good at cooking; if he keeps practicing, he’ll only get better.

“How is it?” Phoon asked excitedly.

“It’s delicious.”

“Really?”

“Really,” I said with a smile, genuinely delicious for someone cooking for the first time, it’s pretty good. Phoon gave a broad, adorable smile. I couldn’t help but gently ruffle his hair. After that, we continued eating together.

…

Typhoon

   I took care of washing the dishes after everyone had finished their meal, with North and Ter helping as usual. At first, Phii Fah said he would help, but of course, we didn’t let him; we would do it ourselves.

“Today is your birthday, Phoon,” North suddenly remembered,

“Why don’t you look excited at all?”

“I don’t know why I should be excited. On your birthday, you didn’t seem excited either.”

“True, you’re twenty-one now, right?”

“Yeah, but I feel like I’m still a kid.”

“Well, today we have to go out, take lots of pictures as a memory, like a birthday trip for you,” Ter said, “Do you have a trip plan yet?”    “Not yet,” I shook my head, “Can you guys help me look? I’m scared I’ll plan something that’s not good.”

“You try first, we’ll wash the dishes,” North said. I nodded, wiped my wet hands, and took out my phone to check, but first, I saw a notification pop up. It was a chat from Daotok. I quickly opened it.

SS: Happy Birthday, cat

   SS: Sent an image

   It was a picture of me in watercolor. Of course, Daotok must have drawn it himself; there was his signature at the bottom right with the date.

“Guys, look at this,” I said excitedly, quickly showing it off to North and Ter.

“Wow, it’s beautiful,” North was stunned when he saw the picture I showed.

“So cute, he drew it for you,” Ter said.

“Yeah, it’s cute,” before I quickly typed back a big thank you and saved the picture immediately, “Whoever has Daotok as a boyfriend must be insanely lucky.”

“Why’s that?” North asked, “His spirit is strong; he can see ghosts, you know.”

“It’s just a minor thing. No one would take offense,” I said.

“Minor my ass, you freak, he saw ghosts!”

“You’re just too scared, North. Besides, didn’t Dao say it was just a slight touch?” I raised an eyebrow, looking at North who was wideeyed with panic, “Right, Ter?”

“How can someone who only works all day have a girlfriend?” Ter pondered, making me think too, “If Dao is going to get a girlfriend, she better be a good person. I’m not worried about Phoon since he’s with Phii Fah, just Foam and Daotok left.”    “Yeah, how’s Foam doing?” North asked.

“What do you think? He got tricked by a girl again,” Ter replied, which made North burst out laughing while also feeling sorry for Foam.

“Oh, poor Foam.”

“I wish there was someone to look after Dao too,” I added, “but it seems like he’s not that interested.”

“Yeah,” North nodded in agreement, “Can we pay off the motorcycle first, like the ‘Ghost Rider’ said?” North imitated Daotok.

Me and Ter couldn’t help but laugh because it was spot on; Dao often gives this kind of response when we ask if he’s thinking about finding someone.

“After paying off the motorcycle, it’ll be time to save for rent,” Ter teased, “We haven’t even paid the electric bill yet, girlfriend? What about the water bill? Tomorrow’s the work deadline too.”

“Life is a struggle, I really like it, what’s the big deal?” North said. I smiled along, then remembered we still had to plan our sightseeing.

“Should we get back to planning today’s trip?”

“Come on, I’ll help search; I’m a first-class guide.”    The three of us worked together to look up information about sightseeing for a while, completely forgetting that the doctors were waiting. Once we had a rough idea, we moved to the living room area, only to find the three doctors had fallen asleep on the sofa, except for Phii Arthit who must have gone back to his room.

   I couldn’t help but smile at the sight in front of me. I genuinely felt grateful to Khun Phii Fah for bringing me to Japan despite being so tired, especially after not sleeping much during the exam week. Then, I quickly pulled out my phone to take a picture.

   It wasn’t just me; North and Ter took pictures too. The three of us tried to suppress our laughter to not wake them up.

   So cute.

Really, really cute. Look, Phii Fah was sitting on the big sofa, arms crossed, leaning back and dozing off, with Phii Jo next to him in the same pose. Meanwhile, Phii Hill was on the single sofa.    But before we could take the picture, they opened their eyes and woke up, making the three of us barely able to put our phones away in time.

   “What are you guys doing?” Phii Fah asked.

“Uh…nothing,” I said, stammering. North nudged me with his elbow, as if to say I wasn’t slick at all, before Phii Jo and Phii Hill stood up.

“Let’s go, see you in an hour.”

“Okay,” Phii Fah replied. Phii Jo dragged North out of the room, and Ter was led out by Phii Hill, “Phoon.”

“Ye…yes?”

“Come here,” Phii Fah said, standing up to gently take my wrist, leading me into the bedroom. I followed in a daze, “Close your eyes.”

“Huh?”

“Close your eyes for a moment.” I slowly closed my eyes as he said, even though I didn’t quite understand. Then I felt something heavy being hung around my neck, “It’s a bit heavy, isn’t it?”

I reached up to feel it and immediately knew it was a camera, so I opened my eyes in excitement.

   This camera is!!!

   “This…this is…”

“Happy birthday to my wonderful person, now twenty-one. I wish every day from now on to be a good day for you Typhoon. No matter what you hope for, may it be fulfilled. I will always support you.”

“…”

“And here’s your gift. Thank you for being the best thing in my life.”

“…hic.” For some reason, tears suddenly welled up, and I couldn’t help but start sobbing. I tried to hold back by pressing my lips together, but it was no use because so many emotions were flooding out from inside.

It’s not just about the gifts.

   Yesterday with my mom was great, and other things too.

   Everything has been wonderful.

   “Hic…Th-thank you, thank you,” I let the tears flow, and Phii Fah gently hugged me to comfort me. After a moment, I stopped crying.

Because these weren’t tears of sadness like they had been for many years.

They were tears of happiness that I hope would last forever.

“Thank you, really thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Phii Fah smiled warmly at me and gently wiped away my tears, our faces just centimeters apart. I was captivated and fell in love with those eyes all over again.

I slowly moved my face closer, softly pressing my lips against his.

Phii Fah seemed slightly surprised before kissing me back.

His strong hand reached around my waist, lifting me so he wouldn’t have to bend down. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and when Phii Fah lifted me, I leaned down to kiss him. Our lips touched, turning into the familiar taste of a kiss.

   Sweet, fragrant, and tender, just like every time.

   Phii Fah placed me on the table. I was slightly startled, opening my eyes in surprise as he kissed me deeply. Soon, his warm tongue invaded, exploring everywhere, my eyes tightly shut as his warm breath tickled my ear. One of Phii Fah’s hands pushed the back of my head closer as if feeling we were not close enough.

   It felt like all the energy was being sucked out of me, my heart beating faster and faster, almost like it was going to explode, the emptiness in my stomach rising. I was breathing heavily, my chest heaving, but the intense rhythm of the kiss didn’t stop, showing no signs of slowing down. He kissed harder until it hurt.

   More than ten minutes passed.

   “…More.”

Phii Fah slowly withdrew from the kiss as if he didn’t want to let go. I gradually opened my eyes to meet those beautiful eyes again.    I was slightly startled when Phii Fah suddenly pressed his thumb against my lips. Even though it wasn’t hard, I was surprised by the pain.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to be rough.”

“…Uh, did my lip split?”

“Yes, sorry about that.”

“…” I felt numb both inside and out, still feeling like Phii Fah was kissing me. I tried to calm my heart, “Is it…very split?”    “Just a little,” Phii Fah smiled.

“I…I’ll go change,” I quickly said with a shaky voice, still embarrassed from what just happened. Phii Fah seemed to understand and gave a satisfied smile. I walked past him, picked up a shirt, set the camera down on the table, and went straight to the bathroom.    Looking in the mirror, I saw my face was very red, so red I thought I might be sick. My lips were also red and swollen, with a slight cut on my lower lip that was bleeding a little.

   Ah…why was it so intense?

   I took off my shirt to shower, and seeing the red marks on my shoulder reminded me of the evening when Phii Fah left those marks.

That’s when I was about to turn towards the shower.    Wait…

   These marks…

   Where did they come from?!

   There were red bruises on the back, just below the shoulder, and there were quite a few of them.

   Phii Fah!

   This is insane! Don’t tell me it was while I was asleep!

   After the shower, I quickly got dressed and went out to confront the suspect, no, the accused.

“Phii Fah,” I called out. Phii Fah, who was playing with his phone, looked up at me with a smile as if nothing had happened, “I found more marks.”    “What kind of marks?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know.”

“You won’t see them once you put on a shirt.”

“That’s not the point at all,” I said with a pout, and then Phii Fah stopped smiling, which made me feel uneasy.

“Go change your shirt,” said the person sitting on the bed in a low voice. I paused for a moment.

“But this shirt is fine, isn’t it?” I said, looking down at my own shirt, a black one I had just bought, but it didn’t show much, just a regular tshirt.

Phii Fah didn’t respond, instead, he walked closer, pulled me up a bit, and bent down to kiss my neck where the shirt didn’t cover. I felt a sharp pain immediately, making me frown and tense up.

   “You can’t wear this shirt anymore,” he said with a sly smile, while I wanted to protest but was too embarrassed to say anything, so I had to go find another shirt to change into. In the end, I wore another regular t-shirt along with a long-sleeve shirt that Phii Fah had bought for me back when we were still writing letters to each other.

The first gift Phii Fah ever gave me.

“I’ve never seen you wear it before, I thought you forgot about it,” Phii Fah commented as I walked back into the bedroom.

“I wear it on special occasions, like today, for my birthday,” I said before Phii Fah went to shower and get dressed. While waiting, I took the opportunity to test my new camera thoroughly. It was a camera many photographers dream of, with its high price, KhunPha had to match the cost. From the moment I saw it, I fell in love with it, both for its external design and its capabilities.

   I tried out various angles in the room with the camera, thinking that today, this would be the one to capture the day’s photos. I needed to get used to it quickly.

   Soon, Phii Fah came out of the bathroom, fully dressed. Normally, Phii Fah wears shirts or t-shirts with jeans and Tiger sneakers; even with just that, he looks very good. I’ve never seen Phii Fah style his hair, guessing it’s not his style, but today he was wearing a jacket too.

   “Secretly taking photos again, huh?” the person I was secretly photographing turned around and asked after I took the opportunity to snap a picture when Phii Fah turned to grab something.

“Just a little, it’s a new camera,” I smiled broadly.

“Can’t help it, having a photographer for a boyfriend.”

“Yeah, it’s really unavoidable.”

SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 35: Beautiful Eye

   Tonfah

   “You really said that?”

“…I, I see.”

I looked at the person next to me, who tried to turn away to hide his blushing face, but it was probably not very effective because his ears were red too. I couldn’t help but smile affectionately.

   Why are you so good at being shy?

   I looked in the mirror and saw Hill and Ter sitting in the back seat.

In reality, after dropping off the younger ones here, we didn’t go anywhere else. We just took our stuff to the hotel and rested because we had just finished our mid-term exams. The accumulated fatigue and stress made me feel very exhausted. Actually, Phoon had told me to rest first, but if I didn’t hurry, there would be no time left. Waiting until the semester ends would be impossible.

   Normally, after finishing exams like this, I would sleep like the dead, but this time, I couldn’t sleep.

   Maybe because there’s no cat to cuddle.

   It has become a habit to sleep while hugging Phoon. Without him, no matter how tired I am, I can’t sleep, even though I usually fall asleep easily, especially on stressful days. No matter how heavy the burden, just coming back to hug Phoon tightly and smell the faint, personal scent, it feels like all the exhaustion goes away.

   “How are you feeling?” I asked.

“I’m good, really good. When I get back, I will tell you all about it in detail,” Phoon turned to say with a happy smile. I already thought it must be good, but seeing Phoon smile like this made me think it was well worth bringing him along.

“Okay, I’ll wait to hear it,” I said, reaching out to gently stroke his head. Phoon smiled sweetly back at me. I don’t know if other people’s cats like their heads stroked, but my cat loves it.

Because every time I feel affectionate, I like to stroke his head, but if he’s grumpy, he’ll pinch my cheek instead, or if he’s even grumpier…well, forget it.

I withdrew my hand, then started the car and drove off.

“Hey, Phoon, tomorrow’s your birthday, what do you want to do?” Ter asked.

“Uh…I don’t know, what should we do?”

“We’re in Japan, want to celebrate?”

“You always want to celebrate even when we’re in Thailand.”

“Tomorrow morning we need to go buy you a birthday present.”

“Actually, you don’t have to, it’s too much trouble for you.”

“That’s how it is, huh?”

“Yeah, that’s how it is. We’re here to travel, and you want to go buy me a present too. It won’t be as fun that way.”

“Alright, we’ll do it later then.”

“No matter what, you want to make sure he’s comfortable, right?”

“Absolutely.”

Tomorrow is Phoon’s birthday. I’m not good at surprises at all, so I don’t think there will be any surprises. Tomorrow, I’ll probably take him out for some fun and then treat him to a celebratory meal. As for the gift, I’ve already prepared it.

We stopped for dinner before heading back to the hotel. We didn’t stop anywhere else because the younger ones told us to go rest. We booked four rooms at the hotel: mine with Phoon, then Ter with Hill, Jo with North, and Arthit, who just went straight to sleep when he arrived. I don’t know if he’s had dinner yet, so I bought an extra set to take back.

I dropped off dinner for Arthit before going back to my room. This time, I didn’t sleep as soundly as before because this hotel is close to my mother’s house and it’s the best option. I didn’t want to stay somewhere far away.

I walked in to see Phoon sitting on the bed, looking through his bag. I took the opportunity to hug him from behind and steal a kiss on his cheek. The little one seemed slightly startled; I saw his ears slowly turn red before he turned to look at me.

“Tell me about today for me, please.”

“Sure.”

I slowly let go of the hug, sat in the middle of the bed, and Phoon sat opposite me. Then, he started telling me everything in detail, starting from when he entered the house.

“And North had a big argument with Daiki; he’s twenty years old, going at it with an eight-year-old, I don’t know why.” I smiled because Phoon made a big frown, “But having North and Ter there was good. I didn’t feel too uncomfortable.”

“Ter and North came along for that reason. They didn’t want Phoon to feel uncomfortable,” I said, “They really care about Phoon.”

“I know, so I really appreciate them.”

“It’s great to have friends like that,” I said. I genuinely felt thankful for Phoon’s friends who are good to him, including his mother, because Phoon is such a good person; he deserves all this, “Phoon is really kind, isn’t he?”

“Is that so?” Phoon asked back, not quite believing what I said.

“Really, you are very kind. There aren’t many people who would be happy when their parents remarry and also love their step-siblings like this.”

“Oh…really?” Phoon was silent for a moment, “It’s because of you and Fan.”

“Huh? Why is that?” I asked.

“Because I am like this, it’s because you and Fan taught me to be like this when he was young. I only hung out with you and Fan, because you are kind, Fan is also kind, so I…became kind like you said, I guess.”

“Oh…” I nodded in understanding, “Did you ask your mom about the gift?” I asked, and Phoon paused.

“Uh…I forgot.”

“…”

“I forgot, I was too busy talking about myself, what should we do?” Phoon started to look a bit flustered.

“It’s okay, we can ask later. We’ll be in touch anyway,” I said.

“…Okay.”

“Actually, I didn’t just talk to your mom,” I told the truth because I had actually talked with his mom for quite a while. Not just what I had told Phoon before. There just wasn’t time to go into details. The person in front of me seemed to get more interested immediately.

“So, what else did you talk about?”

“I think…your mom and Phoon are very similar.”

“…Really?”

“Yes, because you didn’t talk much, so I can’t say a lot, but I think that part of why you is so kind is because of your mom, since she seems kind and gentle too,” I said what I thought, and the other person listened intently, “Plus, they look very similar, especially the eyes.”    “Uh…I didn’t know that.” Phoon said, making a thoughtful face.

“Yes, your mom’s eyes are really beautiful.”

Phoon paused for a moment before slowly looking up at me, his face showing confusion for just a second, then his sweet face started to turn red.

“So I told her thank you for giving you such beautiful eyes.”

“Thank you for giving such a beautiful and bright smile too.”

“Thank you for being gentle and strong, which makes you the same way. Thank you for enduring the hardship, thank you for deciding to keep this child more than twenty years ago.”

“…”

“And that’s why there’s Typhoon for me to love like this every day.”

…

Typhoon

   “…” I stayed silent, not daring to look up at him because those words, which sounded like compliments, made my heart beat even faster than it already was, not to mention the words from earlier.

Having me for Phii Fah to love…

   Ah…this is dangerous again.

   “…Is that all?”

“About that, and then it’s the promise that I made.”

“Oh…” The promise that Phii Fah made must refer to what he told my mother about taking care of and protecting me. Thinking about it still makes me blush. The fact that Phii Fah said that to my mother is very significant to me, “Thank you for making that promise.”

“Then come here for a hug.”

“It’s your reward, you have worked hard.” I didn’t say anything before moving closer, being embraced by him, with my face resting against his chest while he leaned back against the head of the bed. He gently pressed the tip of his nose against my shoulder, making me feel a slight tickle, “You smell nice.”

“…I can’t smell anything,” I said truthfully; I’ve never been able to smell myself since I was born, “What does it smell like?”

“It’s the scent of you. I don’t know. There’s no perfume that smells like this.”

“There might be.”

“If there is, tell me, and I will buy it all out,” Phii Fah said softly,

“and I’ll also order them to stop production.”

“…That might be going too far,” I said my words stuttering, then I felt his large hand reach out to hold mine. I then held his hand with my other hand. Phii Fah’s hands were so soft, and his fingers were beautiful too, “Can you write with both hands?”

“Yes, why?”

“I want to be able to write with both hands too.”    “It’s not necessary,” I said.

“Then why do you have to practice writing with his right hand?

Really, being left-handed isn’t that much of a hassle.”

“Hmm, when I write a lot and your hand gets tired, I can switch hands. Besides, it’s annoying because writing on the left side at a lecture desk is difficult,” I explained.

“Oh, right, that’s true. I hate lecture desks the most, it’s not fair at all. Not everyone in the world is right-handed, why make only one type of lecture desk?” I grumbled, because it’s true, it always makes things hard for me when I have to study in rooms with those desks.

“Once you start studying photography, you probably won’t encounter them much, maybe they won’t focus much on taking lecture notes,” he said.

“Do you know what they study in photography?”

“I don’t know, but I have friends who study photography. Should I ask them for you?”

“Please do, I want to know.”

“What will I get in return?”

“…Phii Fah, have you picked up Phii Jo’s business habits?”    I asked, remembering that North once told me that whenever you ask Phii Jo for something, there’s always something in return. Lately, Phii Fah has started doing the same.

“Not to that extent. Just want a little profit,” Phii Fah said with a sly tone. I frowned even though the other couldn’t see, this one is the master of teasing. I tried to calm myself down for a moment before straightening up and turning to face him.    No matter how many times…I never get used to it.

   Because I was sitting on my knees, I was at the same eye level as Phii Fah. He gave a slight smile, as if waiting to see what I would do next.

   “Ugh…I will look it up myself,” I said, embarrassed to the point of not being able to bear it anymore, intending to turn away but Phii Fah held me back. “Ah!” He easily made me sit on his lap, and before I knew it, our faces were only an inch apart.

“Mmm~” Then his thick lips gently pressed down, and his warm tongue slowly invaded with a gentle yet persistent touch, a kiss that was both tender and emphasizing the sensation as he often does. It wasn’t forceful but made my heart flutter in an indescribable way. I slowly closed my eyes, accepting those sweet sensations.

Every time our tongues touched, it sent a gentle warmth spreading across my chest. Our hands were clasped together, our warm breaths mingling, along with hearts that always beat strongly in moments like these.

Phii Fah let go of one of his hands and moved it up to press against the back of my neck, pulling us closer. The heat from his body made me feel even warmer.

It was both gentle and warm, almost melting me.

“Umm…” I heard a somewhat embarrassing sound when our tongues intertwined. My breathing quickened because my heart was racing too, but I could still catch my breath since the kiss wasn’t too intense, until he increased the passion of the kiss.

“Ugh…” He pressed my neck closer, his tongue exploring my mouth, alternating between nibbling my upper and lower lips. His other hand let go and started to wander again, the warmth from his hand beginning at the small of my back under my shirt, caressing all over my back. With that touch, I felt a hollow feeling in my stomach.

It wasn’t long before I started to struggle for breath, and as if he sensed it, Phii Fah slowly pulled away from the kiss, releasing both his hands. I slowly opened my eyes to see his beautiful eyes looking back at me.

   No matter how many times I look,

   It feels like there’s a galaxy in those eyes,    Drawing my gaze irresistibly.

   He leaned down to kiss my shoulder and neck. I felt a slight sting, indicating he had left another red mark on me. Fortunately, all the marks Phii Fah leaves are hidden under my clothes. Only sometimes does he forget himself and leave a mark in a visible spot, in which case I have to find something to cover it.

   “I’ll ask my friend for you,” Phii Fah said with a satisfied smile.

“You…cheater, I said I’d look for the information myself.”    “I’ll go take a shower and rest now, tomorrow I’ll take you out for a full day of fun,” Phii Fah stated. I nodded in response because Phii Fah looked tired, and I was also worried and wanted him to rest.

Before he let go of the embrace and went to shower.

Left alone on the bed, I pressed my lips together, still feeling the gentle touch from earlier. Every time after we kissed. I liked when he was gentle with me, and that feeling would linger for a long time. While waiting, I picked up my phone, remembering I hadn’t mentioned that I actually took some photos of my mother. It was a pity I didn’t bring my camera to her house, so I only used my phone camera to take the pictures.

There were pictures of my mother sitting on the balcony, both candid shots where she was looking out into the garden and ones where she smiled at the camera. I decided to post the picture where she was smiling on Instagram.

With the caption:

“The most beautiful smile in the world, :)”

   And then Phii Fah’s words echoed in my mind:

“Thank you for giving him such a beautiful and bright smile.”    Will I smile as brightly as my mom? But if Phii Fah says so, it makes me happy. There’s a picture too, I’ll post them gradually. Now, Phoon’s Instagram isn’t just filled with sky pictures anymore.

I decided to change my Instagram bio from ‘Sky Collector’ to

“Happiness Collector.”

   Because from now on, my Instagram will have pictures of me, Phii

Fah, old pictures of Fan, pictures of Mom with Daiki, pictures of Aunt Prae with Fai, pictures of friends, photos capturing all the happy memories I have. I want to keep them in that memory space.

   But I still love looking at the sky the same way, it’s just that from now on, my happiness isn’t just from looking at the sky. I’m happy to see myself smiling. So, I started posting some pictures of myself, which I’ve never done before.    Fan…

   Right now, I…am the happiest.

   I looked at the picture of Daiki and North, which was amusing, especially since I secretly took it when they were fighting. If I post it on Instagram, what would North say? He’d definitely complain, saying the picture looks funny, and it really does.

   This picture also caught Ter in the frame, who was trying to pick up the toys scattered around because those two were arguing, looking quite annoyed.

   It would have been nice if Daotok and Foam were there too.    Then Phii Fah finished showering. I was still damp, wearing a tshirt and long pants that matched, indicating he was ready for bed even though it was past ten o’clock.    I went to grab the hair dryer.

“I will dry your hair for you.”

“Uh, okay,” Phii Fah said before sitting down on the bed. I turned on the dryer and started drying his hair, his naturally black hair. Phii

Fah hardly ever does anything with his hair, I’ve never seen him style it, I guess he doesn’t care much about it.

Oh, but I’ve seen Phii Fah style his hair once, in the picture from the university’s Star Moon contest.

“Phii Fah,” I called out his name after I finished blow-drying his hair, reaching over to put the hairdryer back in the drawer of the bedside table.

“Yes?”

“Tell me about the Star Moon contest for Phoon, please.”

“Why do you want to know about that?”

“I just want to know, please tell me.”

“Hmm…at first, the seniors picked me for it. I wasn’t very keen on going, but the seniors pleaded for help, so I had to go. Initially, I thought I wouldn’t make it through.”

“…you wouldn’t make it?” I raised my eyebrows in confusion. What made him think he wouldn’t make it?

   “Back then, there were Hill, Johan, and Arthit too.”

“Wow, all of them?”

“Yes, but Johan and Arthit didn’t want to join. Those two don’t participate in any activities; they’re not even in the senior junior code club.”

“…” That sounds like Phii Jo and Phii Arthit alright.

“I didn’t really want to do it, but I had to help the faculty. In the end, it was between me and Hill for the moon title, and we got the same number of votes.”

“Oh…”

“At first, they said we should have another round to decide, but I refused. I thought Hill was more suitable for the role, so I let Hill have it. He was complaining big time about why he had to do it, saying he was lazy.”

“…” So, there’s such a thing too…

“But Hill is very responsible, so he had to take on the role, and he did it well too.”

“Was you the runner-up then?”

“Yes.”

“What does the runner-up have to do?”

“I hardly do anything, these kinds of promotions, they call for the faculty moon.”

“Oh…can I be the moon too?” I asked playfully, thinking about myself when I first joined the faculty, “Actually, when I was at the faculty, some seniors asked me, but I declined, and so did Ter.”    “Do you want to be the moon?” Phii Fah raised his eyebrows to ask.

“Just asking, that’s all.”

“You can’t be.”

“…”

“Because I won’t let you be,” Phii Fah said, poking my furrowed brows with his finger, revealing a smile.

“I’m jealous, you know that?”    Jealous…really?

   “Uh…I see,” I didn’t know what else to say. In truth, I’ve never seen

Phii Fah jealous or possessive, so I never thought he’d be possessive over me.

“Your face is red again,” Phii Fah teased me a bit. Feeling the heat on my face, I tried to calm myself down, “You can go shower now, so we can go to sleep.”

“Phii Fahyou can go to sleep first, it’s only just past ten,” I said.

“Go shower, let’s get ready for bed together.”

I like the word ‘together,’ like sleeping together, eating together, things like that, it sounds like something we should do together.

   “If you aren’t here, I can’t sleep.”

“…Uh, okay,” I nodded in understanding, then hurried to grab some clothes and headed to the bathroom. Honestly, can this be called being clingy? I know I’m weak to this, but really, I’m completely weak when it comes to Phii Fah, damn it, Typhoon.

   I took a while to shower before coming out of the bathroom, hanging the towel on the drying rack. I saw Phii Fah playing with his phone, but as soon as he saw me come out, he put his phone down and pulled me into a hug like he often does.

   Before I could say anything, Phii Fah made me lie down and straddled me. I was a bit surprised before his thick lips kissed me again, but only for a moment before he pulled back, moving to hug me from behind instead.

   It was a goodnight kiss…

   “Goodnight,” Phii Fah said softly.

“Goodnight,” I replied.

“I love you Phoon, you know.”

“I love you Phii Fah too.”

Just the simple words of goodnight and love every night, they might seem ordinary, but I love this unchanging simplicity.    I want this kind of simplicity to stay with me forever.    His large hand still held mine, and the embrace from the other person always made me feel comfortable and safe. Before long, his warm breath was by my neck, and after just a moment, I could tell that Phii Fah had fallen asleep.

At first, I was surprised at how quickly Phii Fah could fall asleep, but I remembered that he had told me he was naturally a good sleeper. “If you aren’t here, I can’t sleep.”

   …So, does that mean even someone who falls asleep easily like Phii

Fah can’t sleep without me?

   Thinking about this made me smile unintentionally; I was happy about that because, without Phii Fah’s embrace, I couldn’t sleep either.

   Looking at my phone, it was about half past nine. Maybe in another half hour, I could sleep, to wake up early for more fun tomorrow.    Lying there, thinking about various things, I easily drifted off to sleep

   …

   I woke up around half-past five. This is my usual wake-up time. Every morning when I wake up, I find Phii Fah still holding me just like when we went to sleep. When I wake up like this, I usually just lie there waiting until it’s time to get up because if I get up, Phii Fah wakes up too. I once observed that if I get out of bed, after a while, the arm that was around me starts searching for me, and if it doesn’t find me, Phii Fah wakes up immediately.

   Feeling a bit stiff, I turned to the other side, secretly watching the person sleeping soundly. I’ve always watched Phii Fah sleep ever since we’ve been together, and I’ve never gotten bored of it.

   I don’t know how much time passed. I heard a knock at the door, which forced me to carefully remove the arm that was around me. It seemed like Phii Fah was still asleep. I tiptoed to the door to avoid making noise, peeking through the peephole to see North and Ter. When I opened the door, I saw Phii Hill and Phii Jo leaning against the balcony waiting as well.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Let’s cook.”

“Huh?”

“Cook, that’s what,” Ter repeated.

“I know, but why do you suddenly want to cook?”

“I don’t know either,” North said, shaking his head slightly,

“There’s a supermarket that’s open, let’s go buy some ingredients.”

“And where will we cook?”

“Can we use your room?” Ter asked. I immediately furrowed my brows.

“Why does it have to be my room?”

“Because Phii Fah is kind.”

“…Really?”

“Ter’s room won’t work because Phii Hill doesn’t like loud noises, and my room is out because Phii Jo doesn’t like others entering his room. Of course, Phii Arthit’s room is not an option, so it has to be yours,” North whispered. I sighed without realizing it, guessing it was because these two wanted to go shopping. The seniors had no choice but to join in, I suppose.

“Alright, are we going to buy them now?” I asked, and both nodded in agreement.

“Should we tell Phii Fah?” Ter asked.

“Yeah, he looks tired. I don’t really want to wake him up,” I said, “But let’s try asking him first. It’ll be troublesome if we go without telling him. Come in first,” I turned to tell Phii Hill and Phii Jo, and the four of us walked in to sit on the sofa in the room. The two doctors had just woken up, but they still looked good as always. Meanwhile, I was about to go back to the bedroom.

Suddenly, someone hugged me from behind, making North and Ter look surprised. On the other hand, Phii Hill and Phii Jo didn’t look surprised at all. Before I could react, Phii Fah reached out with one hand to tilt my chin towards him and kissed me gently.

!!!

“Why aren’t you in bed?” Phii Fah, still groggy, asked. He probably hadn’t noticed the people waiting. Out of habit, he kissed me as a way of saying good morning, like he does every day.

“Morning,” I said.

“Uh…yes.”

I was flustered, feeling both embarrassed and shy, turning to look at the people waiting. North and Ter were avoiding eye contact with me.

Meanwhile, Phii Jo and Phii Hill looked surprised.

“Wow,” Phii Jo started to tease, and Phii Fah looked up, a little surprised to see who was waiting but not really shocked.

He should be shocked! He just…uh, kissed!

   “Why are you here?” Phii Fah asked.

“We wanted to invite you to go shopping,” Phii Hill answered,

“Want to join?”

“Do you want to go?” Phii Fah turned to ask me instead. I nodded in response, “Let’s go, wait a sec.” Before Phii Fah took my hand back into the room to change clothes, showing no sign of being affected by what had just happened.

   “Uh…Phii Fah, uh, just now…”

“Hmm? What’s wrong?”

“Everyone saw…”

“The morning kiss, you mean?” Phii Fah asked with a smile. I wanted to protest but couldn’t, “It’s okay, don’t think too much about it.”

“How can I not, it’s embarrassing.”

“Are you sulking?”

“Yes, I’m sulking, a lot,” I pretended to be upset, before Phii Fah scooped me up and placed me on the bed in a straddling position over him. I lightly hit him because I was startled.

“What are you doing?”

“Making up.”

“Who makes up like this?”

“I do,” Phii Fah smiled, “Who made you get out of bed?”

“It was North and Ter knocking on the door.”

“Yes.”

“…Yes?” I gave a puzzled look to the person in front of me, feeling both embarrassed and confused. I had explained it, so why just say

‘yes’?

“Because I already know.”

“I had to get out of bed because they knocked on the door, so you can’t tease you by doing that!”

“I wasn’t teasing at all, I really didn’t see them.”    “Really?” I asked again, and Phii Fah smiled.

“Really, I never tease you.”

“Number one teaser, that’s you Phii Fah,” I said, frowning at him, which earned me a gentle pinch on the nose.

“Then let’s say that one didn’t count. We’ll have to do it properly.”

“Properly?”

“Yes, a real morning kiss.”

“Uh, I don’t think so.”

“A morning kiss, please.”

“…”

“Please.”

See! I told you I’m weak to this.

   I tried to gather the little courage I had because when it comes to kissing or anything like that, I’m rarely the one to initiate. When Phii Fah asks me to do something like this, I usually get too embarrassed to act. With both arms on his shoulders, I slowly leaned in closer.

Every second our faces moved closer at a slow pace before I closed my eyes, and our lips touched.

   After just a brief moment, I pulled back out of shyness, and Phii Fah smiled in satisfaction.

   “Good morning again.”

“Ah…Good morning.”

SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 34: Water Lily

   “Already capable, huh?”

“…”

“Are you worried?”

“Yes.”

“Do you trust Phii Fah?”    I nodded in response.

“Then trust Phii Fah, you are already good.”

“If possible, I’d like you to take the exam for me.”

“No need, you do better than me.”

“…How could that be?”

“Be confident, we’ve done so much preparation. When you did the practice exams, you did very well,” he said, gently stroking my head as he often does. We were now in front of the school where I had to take my entrance exam. I was in my school uniform, and this morning before leaving the room, Phii Fah complimented me saying I looked cute because he had never seen me in a high school uniform before.    My exam is at the end of February, coinciding with everyone’s midterm exams for the second semester, including the doctors. After dropping me off for the exam, Phii Fah would have to go back to study with his friends.

Since the second semester started, I, who had already dropped out, had only one thing to do: study for the entrance exam for the photography faculty. So there wasn’t much else going on, and today was the day to determine my efforts; one could even call it a lifedeciding day without exaggerating much.

Almost all the students passing by, especially the female students, kept looking our way, probably because it wasn’t just the beautiful car but also its owner, who was standing there talking to me.    “You haven’t forgotten anything, right? Like your ID card?”

“Yes, I brought it.”

“Then I’ll wait here until you go into the exam room.”

“Are you going to walk me there?”

“Yes.” And Phii Fah really walked me to the exam building. It wasn’t strange because there were many people sending off or waiting for those taking exams, but Phii Fah probably couldn’t stay long since he had his own exams to study for, which I understood well. Though honestly, even if Phii Fah wanted to wait for me, I wouldn’t agree to it. It would be too hot and boring.

“Can I see your exam room slip?” I opened my bag and handed him the slip, “You have all your exams in this building, you won’t get lost, right? The front number is the floor number, the back number is the room number.”

“I won’t get lost. If I do, I can just ask someone around here.”

“Okay.” Then Phii Fah handed the exam room slip back to me. There was no need to try to notice it; I could feel that we, no, Phii Fah was the center of attention for many people. Even sitting close by, I could feel it.

Phii Fah stayed until there was an announcement for everyone to go upstairs and wait in front of their exam rooms.

“I will leave now. I’ll be here at four o’clock sharp to wait for you.”

“Yes.”

And then the other person walked away. I entered the building, took off my shoes to hold them like the other students, feeling a bit embarrassed since I’m much older than the younger students and had to take an exam like this. It’s been a while since I’ve been in a school building, and the school where I’m taking the exam isn’t far from the university. I chose this exam venue in this province instead of going back to my old school, which would have been much more difficult.    I placed my bag in front of the exam room, took out my pencils, eraser, and ID card, ready to go in for the exam. After waiting for a short while, the announcement came to enter the exam room. The first subject exam went well. I didn’t do everything perfectly, but I was confident with most of it, and I finished with enough time to review everything once more.

I’ve taken this kind of exam three times before, the first time in my sixth year of high school, the second when I was preparing to take a gap year before medical school in my first year, and now this third time. This is the only time I’ve managed to finish the exam in time; the previous two times I had to rush through the last questions because I really didn’t have enough time. Maybe it’s because I’ve practiced a lot with old exam papers and timed myself.

The first day of exams was over. When I came down from the building, I saw Phii Fah waiting as promised.

“How did it go?”

“Good, it went well. I didn’t expect to do so well, and I finished on time too,” I started telling him excitedly about today’s exam, as I didn’t expect it to go so smoothly. Then we went to have lunch.

“Do you have to go for more tutoring?” I asked.

“Yes, do you want to rest or come along?”

“Hmm…yeah, I’ll come along,” I said, because North and Ter were also there, it would be better to go and watch them study rather than staying in the room with nothing to do.

“How did you do, you took the first exam, right?”

“It was good, I managed.”

“My student will definitely pass. All that teaching didn’t go to waste, did any of what I taught come out in the exam?” North asked.

“No.”

“None at all?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t taken the other exams yet.”

“Damn,” North immediately looked disappointed at me, “But you’ll pass anyway, just chill.”

“How was it when you took your exams?” I asked while sitting down next to Ter. We were now at the same café as before. The seniors were sitting at one table, while we were at the Japanese-style table.

“Well…it was shit.”

“I didn’t.”

“It uses the O-NET exam, I applied in the last round.”

“Oh, so you didn’t do well on the O-NET?”

“You could say it was terrible, so bad that my teachers thought I was bringing down the school’s average, but I still got into engineering somehow. Maybe I’m just too handsome,” North’s words made Ter let out a big sigh, even though he was still looking at the study sheet in his hand, “Why the sigh, Ter? My handsomeness is troubling you, huh. It’s okay, I understand, I’m annoyed by it sometimes too.”    “…North, what’s with you today, complimenting yourself all day.

Hasn’t anyone praised you lately?” Ter furrowed his brows to ask.    “Yeah. I don’t know either,” North said, picking up my green tea cup before I could stop him, and he had already drunk half of it. I looked at my green tea cup in confusion, why did the water disappear so quickly?

“So, how’s it going with your mom?” Ter asked, because it had been nearly two months since I got her information.

“Yeah. No updates, it’s been ages.”

“I said I’d contact her after the exam.”

“Oh,” North and Ter nodded, because I had to take the entrance exam during this period. If I contacted my mom now, no matter what the outcome, it would affect my emotions significantly. If my mom was okay with meeting me, my mind wouldn’t be focused, or if she wasn’t, it would make me very sad. So, I discussed with Phii Fah that I would contact her after the exam.

“That’s good, it’s just a few more days until your exam is over, right?”

“Yes, just a few more days.”

“How will you contact her?”

“Maybe…have someone look for her.”

“Huh? How?”

“Like, I can’t just go there directly, right? So, I’ll send someone first. She doesn’t have a personal phone, just a home number. There are no other contact methods like social media, LINE, email, or anything.”    “Yeah, that’s true, but going there directly, how will you do it?”    “I heard that during the day, on non-holidays, her husband is at work, and Daiki is at school. Maybe I’ll approach her during that time.”

“Approach her, huh, but isn’t it scary to just show up out of nowhere?”

“I will go in a friendly way.”

“Will you go straight to the house? What will the neighbors think?”

“Disguise as a salesman.”

“Yeah, that could work,” North said, nodding in agreement, “But who are we sending?”

“Don’t know, but it seems like Phii Fah will handle it.”    “Uh, good, you should write a letter to attach with it, stating the purpose that you want to meet,” Ter suggested. I nodded in agreement.

“I’ve already written it.”

“You need to end it with ‘with love from your son’ too.”

“…Will that be good?”

“Trust me.”

“…Uh.”

…

To: Ms. Yuri Nakamura

   Hello, first of all, let me introduce myself. My name is Theerapat Chawankawi, nickname Typhoon, age 20. It’s very difficult for me to say this. According to the information and evidence I’ve received, you are my mother. I don’t know if you’ll be okay with what’s happening now, but I truly want to say that I’m glad to finally know who my real mother is.

   I only found out a few years ago that I was not the biological child of the mother who raised me. When my older sister passed away, my parents had already divorced.

   I’ve always been a child who wanted to know who my real mother was, but I didn’t know where to look. I only knew about the gifts sent every year on my birthday, with ‘To Ren’ written on the box. I hope that was from you.

   If that’s true, I’m glad that you still think of me. I truly am. I’ve never been angry that you weren’t with me, no matter the reason. I’ve never been angry, really. I’ve always hoped that you were somewhere in this world and living happily.

   I must apologize for taking the liberty to look into your information. I know you have a new family now. I hope they treat you well.

   I used to be sad that I didn’t even have a name given by my mother, but if that name was really mine, I don’t know if I could be the ‘Ren’ you had hoped for. I’m not someone to be proud of, sometimes even disappointing, but I have many stories I want to share. At the very least, could you tell me what kind of ‘Ren’ my mother had imagined, and if I could be that person?

   All I want to say in this letter is that I’m doing well. I’ve found someone who loves me. I have friends. I have people around me who genuinely care for me. I have dreams and life goals I want to achieve. If there’s ever a time when my mother wonders if I’m okay, I am doing well, please don’t worry.

   If my mother doesn’t want to meet me, that’s okay too. I just wanted to let her know this much.

   I hope that every day from now on, my mother has nothing but smiles.

   I hope Daiki is a good kid and grows up strong.

   Yours truly,

   Theerapat Chaowankavee, Typhoon (Ren)

  

At first, I wondered if my mom could read Thai since she hasn’t been in Thailand for so long, but Phii Fah said he would translate it into Japanese.

“Have you finished writing?”

“Yeah…I have, with a few tears from Phoon.”

“It’s okay.”

“Do you think my mom will read my letter?”

“She will read it. The one who sends gifts every year does so because she misses you, right? Don’t overthink it,” Phii Fah said before gently stroking my head to comfort me.

I don’t know if it’s good or not, but I also sent a gift for my mother, a small handmade good luck charm from me. I don’t know if it will bring luck, but it’s filled with my prayers.

   I wanted to send something with it, but I wasn’t sure if it was okay, if my mother would be okay with it, so I didn’t send it yet.

   After I sent the gift and the letter, nearly a month passed without any response, but the letter and gift did reach my mother.

   “…Did he say he would contact you back?”

“Yes, Phoon should give your mother some time.”

“…He probably doesn’t want to see Phoon.”

“Don’t think negatively like that,” before Phii Fah pulled me into a hug. During the one month when there was no response from her, I was completely disheartened, and Phii Fah could only comfort me.

Deep down, I had somewhat prepared myself for it.

Until three days later…

“There’s a letter sent back.”

“!!” I was shocked and immediately ran to Phii Fah. When I saw something in Phii Fah’s hand, my heart started beating faster.    “Your mother just sent it back,” Phii Fah handed it to me. I quickly took it and opened it. It was a letter with a small gift, but what I was interested in was the letter. I opened it immediately; it was written with a pencil on paper, the handwriting clearly showing the writer was not adept at Thai. It was just a short message, guessing that my mother isn’t very good at writing Thai, and there were spelling mistakes, but I could understand the meaning.

It must be because my mother doesn’t have a mobile phone and doesn’t know how to use the internet, so she didn’t know how to find the right words, but she still tried to write.

…Ren

   Mom thi-n-ks about you

   Will wait to see you    Mom…

   “…” Tears slowly started to fall. I wiped them away before handing the small piece of paper to Phii Fah. He took it and gave a faint smile.

“That’s good, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” I burst into a wide smile, feeling overjoyed and touched, not crying but just letting a few tears fall. Then I turned my attention to the gift that came with it, finding it to be some sweets in a box along with a card written in Japanese, “What does this say?”    “…Uh, it probably means she made them herself, enjoy them.”    I looked at the sweets in the box. I thought they must be manju, and there were quite a lot of them. I quickly picked one up to eat and found it quite delicious, so I let Phii Fah try one too. Phii Fah tasted one and said it was good, but since he doesn’t really like sweets, he only ate one.

   I’m not that into sweets either, but I can eat them if offered, and because of the joy that they were made by my mother, I ended up eating half of them alone. I’ll share the rest with the others later.

   “I am going to meet my mother soon. I’m so excited.”

“Let’s go together once Phii Fah clears his schedule.”

“Sure, but where is Mom’s house? Does Phii Fah know?”

“Osaka.”

“And do we need to make an appointment before going? Did she say anything else?”

“She said we can come to the house anytime because her husband knows. Just let them know beforehand which day we’ll come so they can prepare. You can contact them through the home phone.”    “…Wow,” I said, feeling dumbfounded. So, her new husband knows Mom had a child before, and he’s okay with it, even allowing us to visit their home. That’s amazing, so kind. “How many days will we go?”

“We can’t stay long. I have to study, so we’ll visit your mom for a day and maybe have a day or two to explore.”

“Oh, thank you so much. Not only are you helping my mom, but you’re also taking me to see her.”

“Sure,” Phii Fah smiled in acknowledgment of the thanks and gently patted my head.    “You are so kind.”

“Me?”

“Yes, but I guess many people have complimented you before.”    “Not really, with others, it’s just normal,” Phii Fah said, “but for you, I would do anything.” Those words made me smile shyly.

Because Phii Fah wasn’t lying.

   Phii Fah would do anything for me, just like how I would do anything for him.

   I’m not sure if what Daotok said about it being true love is true, but if it is, that’s great…if not, it doesn’t matter because having each other right now is the best thing ever, better than wondering if it’s true love.

Because it’s Phii Fah, because it’s me, here together. Nothing could be better than this.

   Three days have passed, and my friend still hasn’t stopped smiling.

   “Give me some of that.”

“Yeah, give me some,” I said. We’re at the airport now, getting ready to go to Japan. After I told everyone about this, they got really excited and happy, saying they wanted to come too because they had some free time and wanted to visit my mom and go sightseeing together. “And have you finished eating the manju?”

“Ter ate them all the day you brought them, even snatched them from me. I was so mad.”

“You were just too slow, speed is the devil’s trait.”

“It’s the trait of a glutton, you mean.”

“North!”

“What? You weren’t satisfied with stealing mine, you even took from the little ghost, too. It’s just a tiny thing, and you still go after it.” North said, Ter immediately made a displeased face looking at North.

Honestly, it wasn’t that surprising; Ter has always been a big eater.

“It was delicious, and I was hungry.”

“You’re hungry all day. Seriously, did you die of malnutrition in your past life or something? How can you be this famished?” I couldn’t help but laugh at North’s words.

“Yeah, right, it’s like you’ve been starving since your past life.” “Even your cat thinks I’m a glutton,” Ter immediately pouted. “Joking, come on,” I said, reaching out to playfully twist Ter’s cheek as if comforting a child.

“Give me a KitKat to make up for it.”

“Can you stop thinking about food for just one minute?” North said, making an annoyed face immediately. “I know why the little ghost is so thin, it’s because you’re always snatching its food, right Ter?

Confess.”

“It wasn’t me! Dao left some, and I ate it because I felt bad for wasting it.”

“You were staring at it while it ate, so it thought you were hungry and left some for you.”

“That’s not true! I was just looking, not staring!”

“I’ve found the culprit behind the little ghost’s hospital visits.”

“I told you it wasn’t me, I’m not guilty.”

“Enough, you guys,” I interjected. They weren’t really fighting, just teasing each other, but it was still quite headache-inducing.

“And, did you invite Dao?” Ter asked.

“I invited him, but Dao said he wasn’t free.”

“Always, so I pretend to be upset,” North said.

“Why be upset? He’s working,” I said. Initially, I invited Foam and

Dao, but both declined. Foam said his family wouldn’t allow it, and Dao said he was busy with work.

“What’s so hard about it? Working to buy new equipment, then using the new equipment to work,” North started complaining. Lately, he’s been constantly complaining about Dao working non-stop without taking a break. At first, he seemed brighter because he was practicing meditation, but over time, he ended up like overcooked dumplings again. “I’m getting annoyed just thinking about it. I’ll sneak in and break his computer.”    “It’s good that you’re concerned.”

“Come on. If I weren’t concerned, why would I complain? And he doesn’t even listen to me, that bastard Dao.”

“Why get so angry about it?”

“He went to the hospital last time. Next time he goes in, I’ll put chili in his IV.”

“That’s harsh, really harsh,” I said, laughing. North really does care, that’s why he gets so mad, but I don’t know why he’s still so likable.    If I had another two or three months, I might go study Japanese, but I don’t have that much time, so I didn’t enroll. I’m not sure how I’ll talk to Mom. When she was in Thailand for more than two years, she might have been able to speak some Thai, but it’s been a while now.

   “Can your mom speak Thai?” North asked.

“I don’t know, maybe she can, at least she used to. Otherwise, how would she talk to Dad?”

“Your dad might speak Japanese.”

“Yeah, I don’t know about that,” I said. I’m also not sure if Dad can speak Japanese.

“And where are you meeting your mom?”

“Right at her house.”

“Really? Her new husband doesn’t mind?”

“…It seems Mom told me that her new husband knows, and it’s fine.”

“Wow, that makes it easy then,” Ter said, “You’ll get to meet the stepdad too.”

“Hmm,” I said with a smile, in truth, we had already made plans to meet Mom in Japan around the afternoon. She mentioned that she would prepare snacks for everyone. Of course, I didn’t talk to Mom directly; I had someone else relay the message. I was planning to meet her directly.

“Smiling again, Phoon, you haven’t stopped smiling. Don’t your cheeks hurt?”

“When I’m happy, what’s the problem?” I stopped smiling and turned to North.

“Look away, it’s creepy, your eyes are all dreamy, looking at nothing, and then you smile again.” Now, besides us, there were also our seniors, which included Phii Fah, Phii Hill, Phii Jo, and Phii Arthit.

Phii Arthit said he was just coming along but would go sightseeing by himself before meeting back with us.

“I’ve never been to Japan,” North said. I raised my eyebrows and looked at him.

“Really? I thought you had been.”

“No, Phii Jo only took me to Europe, kind of skipped a step. Now with the cherry blossom season in Japan, it’s supposed to be beautiful,” North said while looking at his phone, which had information about Japan displayed. “I’m excited for my first trip to

Japan, so I’ve prepared.”

“How so?”

“I studied the language.”

“Really?” I looked at him in almost disbelief at what I’d just heard.

“Yeah.”

“How did you study?”

“Watched anime with Thai subtitles, binged twenty-four episodes in a row.”

“Spit.”

“Let’s go,” Phii Fah spoke up. I immediately stood up; I was so caught up talking with them that I forgot to check the time. Then, the seven of us boarded the plane together, and with our seniors along, don’t expect economy class seats. It was definitely first class. I sat in my seat, which was a pair, with Phii Fah next to me. To my left were North and Phii Jo, then Phii Arthit, and beside Phii Fah were Ter and Phii Hill. Around me, there didn’t seem to be anyone else; it felt like it was just us.

“Where are you planning to go, Arthit?” Phii Jo asked.

“I don’t know. Where are you guys going?”

“Where are we going?”

“Osaka.”

“Oh, Osaka…what’s there to do?”

“You still don’t have a plan?” Phii Jo asked, Phii Arthit shook his head gently.

“I want to ski.”

“There might be some snow for you.”

“Yeah, bummer. So, what are you guys doing in Osaka?”    “Arthit, what do you know about why we’re here?” Phii Fah turned to ask, the person questioned shook his head.

“I thought you were taking your wives on a trip. Isn’t that it?”

“Uh, yeah, that’s right.”

“Should I transfer to another place? There doesn’t seem to be much to do in Japan anymore.”

“No,” Phii Fah interjected before Phii Arthit could finish speaking,

“I won’t allow any more solo trips.”

“Oh.”

“Jo, don’t let Arthit out of your sight,” Phii Fah said, Phii Jo immediately furrowed his brows looking over.

“Are you ordering me around?”

“Yes.”

“You have the right to…”

“The right of someone who works for you guys.”

“Yeah, sure, Tonfah, Arthit, behave yourself,” Phii Jo said. I don’t know why I burst out laughing; it seems like Phii Arthit often sneaks away on trips, so everyone has to keep a close eye on him.    “Okay, I won’t sneak off then; I’ll stick with you guys like a little wife,” Phii Arthit said, “North.”

“What, bro?”

“This trip is our honeymoon with Jo, you go wherever, just don’t be in the way.”

“Let me come along, bro, I can help carry stuff. I won’t be a nuisance.”

“Fine, since you’re begging so much.”

“Sigh,” I heard Phii Jo let out a small sigh; he looked tired too, dealing with both North and Phii Arthit.

The journey to Japan took several hours until we arrived at Kansai Airport. At first, we discussed how to get to Osaka. We ended up deciding on the train because North wanted to ride it.

“You want to ride, fine, but the train is so cramped it’s killing me,” Phii Arthit cursed at North.

“I’ve never ridden one before, I want to try.”

“And why do I have to ride with you? Why do I have to cater to your whims?”

“Arthit, just shut up already,” Phii Jo said, making Phii Arthit pretend to zip his lips, gesturing towards North and himself, probably implying, why do I have to shut up while North doesn’t?

Of course, with Phii Fah, we became the center of attention, and with four doctors together, it was even more noticeable. I’m not sure how it feels to be the focus of everyone’s attention, but it seems like they didn’t mind.

When we arrived in Osaka by train, we had to discuss our next steps. We ended up deciding to rent cars; North and Ter said they were just visiting, they brought gifts, and would drop me off at the house entrance then go elsewhere. So we got two cars: one for Phii Fah and me, with Phii Hill and Ter in the back, and the other for Phii Jo, North, and Phii Arthit.

I gazed at the changing scenery along the way, and thinking about meeting Mom made my heart beat faster, with both excitement and worry, holding the gifts tightly in my hands.

“Are you excited?”

“Yes, very much so,” I looked at the time; it was around three in the afternoon. I wasn’t sure if Daiki’s school or Saito’s work was over yet. Saito is Mom’s new husband. “I’m worried it might not go well, coming like this.”

“It will be fine, for sure.”

“Yes.”

Before the car stopped in front of one house, Phii Fah checked the map on his phone again, seemingly confident it was the right house. I looked at the house with a heart beating out of rhythm; it wasn’t particularly large. I slowly got out of the car to find the area was quite peaceful, and the weather was pleasantly warm.

“Is this the one?” Phii Hill asked after getting out of the car, Phii Fah nodded in response. Having three cars parked like this, was it going to be a problem?

“There’s someone there,” Phii Jo said, making me turn my attention back to the house. I just saw a woman in a cream-colored t-shirt and skirt come out, looking at us with a surprised expression.

Mom…

   It really was Mom, just like in the pictures.

   “…Mom,” I called out to her, and she quickly opened the gate and walked towards us.

“Ren!” Then she rushed over and hugged someone.

…But it wasn’t me.

???

Why did she hug North?!

“Uh…Arigatou.”

North said in a stuttering, shy voice, and hugged her back.

   And why are you thanking her?!

   Mom let go of the hug and held North’s face, speaking rapidly in Japanese with an expression of joy and excitement. North was completely bewildered, not knowing what to do, while the rest of us burst into laughter.

   Oh, come to think of it, Mom has never seen me before.

   “Ah, sorry, but…I’m not Ren,” North finally said, making Mom stop touching him.

“What…what did you say?” Mom asked in a Thai accent that wasn’t clear. North pointed at me.

“That one over there.”

“Oh, Gomennasai, I’m sorry, really sorry,” Mom bowed awkwardly to North before turning to look at me, slowly walking closer, then looking up at me, “Ren…right?”

“Yes.”

Mom slowly moved closer and gently hugged me. The moment I smelled her faint perfume and felt the warmth of her embrace, I started crying and hugged her back. Mom also cried, and we held each other tightly for several minutes.

   After we let go of each other, Mom gently wiped away my tears, touching my cheeks, shoulders, and arms as if examining how much I’ve grown, with tears still flowing from her eyes.

   “You’ve grown so much,” she said, gently stroking my head with a soft gaze, a faint smile tinged with sadness and longing that words couldn’t describe.

“I’ve come to see you,” I managed to say between sobs, which only made Mom cry more. We spent some time outside the house before Mom suddenly remembered something.

“Come inside first,” she said in Japanese, but it seemed she could speak Thai too. The doctors said they would wait elsewhere because they didn’t want to intrude, wanting us to have as much time together as possible, but North and Ter said they wanted to stay.

“Take care of yourself,” Phii Fah advised.

“Yes.”

“Call me if anything happens.”

“Yes.” We talked a little more, then we walked into the house.    “Phoon, I knew you could confuse anyone. Without asking, she just hugged me first,” North whispered to me, which made me laugh.

“Yeah,” I said, still finding it amusing.

“Irasshaimase,” North said as we entered the house.

“That’s not right, is it?” Ter asked, his brows furrowed, and Mom, hearing this, turned to look with a slightly puzzled expression.    The inside of the house was larger than I expected, and before I could look around much, Mom led us to the living room where there was a large floor table with cushions arranged around it.

“I’ll get some tea for you,” Mom smiled, then slowly backed away and stepped out.

“Damn, your mom is like a Japanese housewife,” North said excitedly, looking around because Mom had been told that friends were coming too, so she had set up seating.

Mom was smaller than I had imagined, about the height of my shoulder, a very petite woman, and she seemed very gentle and kind.    “Irasshaimase,” North replied as Mom placed steaming cups of tea in front of us.

“What are you ‘Irasshaimase’-ing about?”

“Irasshaimase means ‘welcome’, when we go to a restaurant,” Mom replied to North in a sweet voice. I couldn’t help but laugh at him, hoping this would make him stop playing around.

“Irasshaimase.”

Damn, shameless, still messing around!

   I was right not to invite him, wasn’t I?

   “We brought some gifts,” Ter said, handing a bag of gifts to Mom. She smiled and slightly bowed before accepting it, and Ter, who seemed unsure of what to do, bowed back.

“I have one too,” North said, offering his gift, and Mom did the same to him as she did with Ter. I took a sip from the tea in front of me.

“How is it?” Mom asked. I smiled and took another sip with difficulty; it was extremely bitter, bitter to the back of my throat.

“It’s delicious.”

“How is it?” Mom turned to ask North, who smiled broadly and blinked rapidly.

“Is it original?”

“?”

“I mean, is it authentic?”

“Oh…” Mom looked at me as if she didn’t understand. I didn’t know how to answer either, so I responded to North instead.

“Yeah, authentic, we’re in Japan, so it’s Japanese tea, probably

Chinese tea.”

I watched North try to drink it all, and when he finished, he set the cup down and gently wiped his tears. Did it make you cry because it’s so bitter?

   “How do you feel?” Ter asked quietly.

“Encountered the authentic one, I can’t even speak Thai clearly now,” North said with a muffled voice, but we all finished our cups regardless. “Don’t they have something for tea beginners, so we can practice before facing the real thing?”

“Don’t be fussy,” Ter said, frowning. “Oh, right, we haven’t introduced ourselves yet. My name is Ter, you can call me Ter.”

“My name is North.”

“Are you friends, same age?” Mom asked.

“Yes.”

“What are you studying?”

“I’m studying wisakam.”

“Wisakam? What is that?”

“Uh, like, engineering designing, managing projects, stuff like that.”    “Oh, and you?” she turned to ask Ter.

“I’m studying veterinary medicine, a doctor for animals.”

“Oh, impressive, and you, Ren?”

“I’m waiting for my exam results, I want to study photography.” “Oh…” Mom nodded in understanding, and before we could talk more, we heard a child’s shout from the front door, followed by running footsteps.

Daiki!

   Daiki looked surprised to see the three of us sitting there. The mother and son spoke in Japanese, which I didn’t understand, before Mom brought Daiki to sit beside us. He looked at me, slightly bowed his head, and said something, seemingly introducing himself.    “He said his name is Daiki, nice to meet you. This child has wanted a big brother for a long time,” Mom said. I looked at the chubby kid who was staring at me with sparkling eyes.

“Really? I’ve always wanted a little brother too,” I replied, and Mom seemed to translate for Daiki, who then smiled broadly and rushed to hug me tightly before letting go. Mom then introduced North and Ter to Daiki.

“What did he say?” North asked.

“Daiki said this big brother looks like a goldfish.”

“…”

“Ahhhhh, ahhhhh,” Daiki cried out as North pulled on his cheeks until they were all stretched out.

“North, don’t tease him,” I tried to stop him, but it seemed too late; they were already play-fighting. North, you’re twenty years old, my friend, what do you gain from fighting with an eight-year-old? Mom just laughed, watching them with affection.

Daiki said something in Japanese, trying to pull North’s ears and cheeks in retaliation, but North wasn’t having any of it either.    “What did you say, Mom, what did he say?”

“He said if you’re a goldfish, you should go live in water.”    “This kid,” both me and Ter just watched helplessly, the scene in front of us somehow looking absurd, “He’s grown up to be a fool, still can’t understand Thai.”    Well, he’s Japanese…

   The pointless war ended with both of them panting, before Daiki turned this way.

   “Daiki wants to invite you to play with his toys, he says he has something cool to show off.”

“Oh, come on, let’s go,” Ter stood up, “You stay with Mom, we’ll play with the little brother.” I nodded in response.

As Ter was led out by Daiki, Daiki stuck his tongue out at North.    “I told you this kid is a troublemaker,” North said before standing up and following Ter, leaving only me and Mom in the living room. Silence enveloped us. They must have wanted to give me time with Mom.

I knew why they insisted on coming into the house from the start; they were worried I might feel awkward. Once they saw I was okay, they found an excuse to leave us alone, just the two of us. I have to thank those two for that. Otherwise, I would have been much more nervous and wouldn’t have known what to do.

“…I…I’m sorry.”

“…”

“For not…being with you.”

“It’s okay.”

“Ugh…I…I’m really sorry.” And then Mom started crying again, her sobs growing until her whole body shook. I could do nothing but comfort her, “Ugh, I love you.”

“…”

“I love you…I have missed you so much, it…it might seem unbelievable.”

“I believe…I believe you. I’ve…missed you too, I’ve always wanted to see you.”

“Ugh…uh, uhh,” we hugged and comforted each other in the quiet room, filling the void of over twenty years of missed warmth and love. I couldn’t help but cry again; the scent of Mom, the warmth of her embrace that I had never experienced before, it was more than longing, more than anything in this world, it was an embrace that nothing could replace.

It felt like the emptiness in my heart, the part meant for Mom, was being filled.

After a while, Mom took my hand and led me to the back of the house to sit on the veranda, facing a small garden with a pond. Mom went away for about five minutes before coming back with snacks.

The atmosphere here wasn’t bad at all, it was beautiful, with a gentle breeze that made the hanging mobiles sway, creating a melodious sound.

“I want to hear about your life.”

“Yes?”

“Everything…that you’ve been through, that I wasn’t there for.”

“Oh…can you tell me about your story first?”

“From the time I went there?”

“Yes.”

“Hmm…it started when Grandma passed away. Grandpa died when I was still a child, so it was just me and Grandma. After I finished school, Grandma passed away, and before she died, she said she wanted to go back to Thailand, so I took…uh, your Grandma’s ashes, to Thailand for the first time with just a little bit of money.”

“…”

“To…Phuket.”

“Oh…so Grandma was from Phuket.”

“Yes, I didn’t have money, so I went to work, washing dishes at a restaurant. Later on, they let me serve food too, that’s when I met…your father.”

“I don’t know…how it was. I was very young back then, too young to understand anything, alone in a foreign country, so when someone showed care, I was overjoyed. I never thought he would deceive me, I gave him everything, my body, my heart, until I got pregnant.”

“He told me to get an abortion, he threw money at me…two thousand baht, I think it was at the time, he said he was already married, he couldn’t take responsibility, and he even pointed at me and cursed, saying that the child in my womb might not even be his, he said…what was it, I was a woman…a woman…”

“Never mind, keep going,” it seemed like Mom couldn’t remember those words, but it was for the best; they were probably not good words. So I told her to move on.

“At that time, I…didn’t know what to do, angry, heartbroken, and unsure, but I didn’t want to have an abortion, so I kept that money to buy food. I couldn’t afford prenatal care, so I delivered the baby alone in my room, with help from the neighbor next door.”

“At first, I wanted to raise the child by myself, but then I looked at myself and felt…pitiful. I didn’t have enough milk because my health wasn’t good, and I didn’t have money to buy milk for the baby; I felt sorry for the child. Back then, the only thing I could think of was pity for my child.”

“During the pregnancy, your father never came to see me. I could contact him sporadically, until one day I thought he should take responsibility or at least help us. I carried the baby…hugged you tight, crying, went to him, begged him to help us because the baby was going to starve.”

“…” Mom seemed about to cry but tried to hold it back several times, and I felt like crying too. Why did Mom have to go through so much hardship, and she was only eighteen or nineteen back then, right?

“He didn’t accept it. We argued in front of his house; he tried to send me away until his wife showed up. She…was holding a child too, I think her name was Torfan.”

“We argued for a while, with people from around there gathering to watch. We had to stop, and his wife suggested a DNA test, saying we would talk again if it matched.”

“Your father didn’t want to do the test, but his wife forced him to. They did the test, and it matched. After some discussion, it ended with him telling Mom to leave the child there and not to interfere with the child or them anymore, otherwise, they wouldn’t help at all.”    “He looked very displeased, but since the child didn’t know anything, his wife must have felt sorry, so I chose to let the child stay with them.”    “…Why?”

“At least you would have enough to eat every meal, and sleep in a warm bed.” I bit my lip hard, feeling a tightness in my chest from those words; Mom didn’t want to leave me…she really didn’t want to.    “Me last request was to name the child Ren if possible, he agreed, but it seems he didn’t do it because the name was what I intended for my first child.”

“Why Ren?” I asked curiously.

“Ren…means lotus. My name means lily, and they are similar. For me, the lotus…”

“…isn’t beautiful when it’s arranged in a bouquet or put in a vase, but I think it’s beautiful just as it is in its own place. It doesn’t need extra decoration to be beautiful, because it’s inherently beautiful.”    “I wanted my child to be like a lotus, beautiful as they are, in their own way and in their own place. Without anyone telling them how they should be or where they should be.”

“They don’t need to try to be as beautiful as roses in a vase, because the lotus is most beautiful when it’s on the water.”

“Oh…I understand now. Being oneself and in one’s own space is the best…right?”

“Uh, that’s right,” Mom smiled, “Let me continue…After that, I secretly watched over you for several months, until I was sure you’d be safe there, then I decided to go back to Japan. Because if I stayed in Thailand, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from seeing you.”    “I worked and saved some money to start anew in Japan, but because I missed you, I…sent birthday gifts every year, oh, isn’t your birthday tomorrow?”

“Oh…yes, it is, I forgot.”

“You’ll be twenty-one soon, right?”

“Yes.”

“And after that…were they good to you?” Mom asked with a worried and concerned look. I bit my lip tightly before letting out a sigh, probably because when I was still a baby, Fan’s mother might have cared for me somewhat, but as time passed, raising someone else’s child with her husband wasn’t as easy as one might think.

“It’s okay, it’s all in the past now,” I answered.

“…Tell me about your life.”

“Aren’t you going to ask about Dad?”

“No,” Mom shook her head gently, “Forget about him, tell me about your life instead.”

And so I started telling my story from childhood, about how I was as a kid, how I won poetry contests, awards for Thai calligraphy in primary school, how I was the class representative for reading at the stage, how I often topped my class, recounting all the significant events from each age to Mom. These were proud moments I wanted to share with someone, but no one listened except Fan. These were small, trivial things a child wanted to boast about how well they did, but no one cared.

   Mom listened to my stories with interest, her face showing happiness and pride throughout. This is what I meant by wanting to tell Mom so many things because, throughout my childhood, aside from Phii Fah and Fan, no one ever praised my efforts.

   “So clever, you were the class leader too.”

“Yes, but there were some kids at the back of the class who didn’t like to listen to me.”

“…And what did you do then?”

“I told the teacher, and when they got scolded, they would pick on me, but I always fought back.”    “You’re strong, did you get hurt?”

“…Sometimes, it’s just a boy’s injury. When they saw I wasn’t afraid of the back-row kids, whenever they bullied others in the class, the classmates would come to me for help. I could always help the class.”

“You were quite dependable as a kid, huh?”

“And then, when I was in grade five…” I told my story in great detail and with enthusiasm, it took a while to get to the present day.    “So, the person standing next to you when you arrived, is that your partner?”

“Yes.”

“And the others?”

“The one wearing the blue shirt is Ter’s partner. The one in the gray shirt is North’s partner.”

“And the other one?”

“That one is just a friend of theirs.”

“Oh, how lovely, everyone came to see you off,” Mom smiled, “It will soon be dinner time, invite them to eat with us, or you could stay here if you want.”

“It’s okay, I don’t want to impose.”

“Impose what? No such thing.”

“Really, meeting like this with you is like a dream. This is enough for me,” I said sincerely, not wanting to impose any further.

“Or is it because you’re not happy that I remarried…”

“No, not at all, it’s good actually, you get to start a new life, and there’s someone to look after you.”

“…Son,” Mom bit her lip as if she wanted to say something, “But I…have always felt guilty for not doing anything for you. Now, I am ready to make amends; you can move in with me if you want.”    “No…it’s okay,” I said softly, furrowing my brows, feeling very touched by what Mom said, “This is enough, thank you for letting me come see you.”

“…Why do you talk like we won’t meet again?”

“I didn’t mean it like that at all, but…how should I put it, I want you to have a new life. I just want you to know that I’m doing well. Don’t worry or be anxious. I just wanted to see that you are well too. I want you to continue on the new path you’ve chosen. As for me, I’ll walk the path I’ve chosen. We’re not on the same path, but we still have each other, right?”

“Uh…I understand, but I’m still your Mom…right?”

“Yes. No matter what. I want you to be my Mom,” I said with a broad smile, feeling my heart swell with warmth, “And I’ll still be your Ren.”

“…Uh, I love you.”

“I love you too, Mom.” I held the small hand of the person sitting next to me, and Mom held my hand back, her hand so soft and warm.

“We’ll see each other again, right?” Mom asked.

“Yes, if there’s a chance, I’ll come visit.”

“Uh, don’t forget to visit me, okay, son?”

“Oh…right, Mom.”

“Hmm?”

“If it’s not too much trouble…can you write letters to me, maybe once in a while?”    “Oh…of course.”

“Thank you.” We exchanged addresses for sending letters, and then we walked back inside the house, finding the three of them playing in the living room. I joined them until Phii Fah messaged asking where we would have dinner since it was getting late.

And while I was about to ask Ter and North, I heard someone walking in, and it turned out to be Saito, Mom’s husband. When he came back, Mom went to help him with his bag and take off his suit jacket.

   Mom introduced us to Saito, who seemed like a very kind man, and he even invited us to stay for dinner. However, I had to decline, thinking it would be better for their family to have dinner together.

   Seeing this made me feel even more at ease.

   Mom really does have a good new family now.

   It’s a very warm family indeed.

   I messaged Phii Fah that we would go out to eat together, and after a short wait, the doctors came to pick us up. It was time for us to head back.

   “Damn, this kid, even in front of your dad, he’s still messing with me,” North complained heatedly because Daiki had grabbed his pants to prevent him from leaving.    “He just doesn’t want you to go.”

“Shit, he’s just pulling on my pants, damn it, stop it, my pants are going to tear!”

Daiki looked up and said something to me, so Mom translated:    “Daiki said you haven’t beaten him in the game yet. Next time, he’ll give you a chance to redeem yourself, so come back soon.” I couldn’t help but smile at what Mom translated from Daiki’s words, and I sat down to gently pat the chubby kid’s head.

“Prepare to lose next time,” I said, and Mom had to translate again, making Daiki smile broadly. I couldn’t resist pinching his chubby cheeks out of affection.

“I’ll be going now. I’ll send a letter.”

“I will wait, happy early birthday, son. Take care of yourself; you’re too thin. Don’t forget to eat a lot, your skin is too pale, exercise some, don’t stress yourself too much. No matter what, I believe you can do it. If anything, talk to me. As for what you asked about being the person I expected…”

“…”

“You’ve always been my son. No matter what, I love you and am proud of you.”

“I love you too, Mom.” I hugged Mom one last time as a farewell, then I noticed Daiki was crying. This was after North tried to pry his hand off his pants.

“Do you want my pants that badly?”

“He doesn’t want you to go. He doesn’t want your pants,” Ter said.

“Snot’s all over my pants now!”

Mom went to pull Daiki away from North.

“This kid acts like this when he likes someone; he must really like you North,” Mom said with a smile, turning to speak a few sentences to Daiki before looking back at me, “He said that Ter and Ren are kind brothers. As for North, he’s very mean, but he still wants to play with all three of you again.”

“What’s mean about that? He messed with me first,” North turned to say to Ter, who could only shake his head slightly in disgust.    “Fighting with an eight-year-old, I’m going crazy.”    “We’ll definitely come back, so stop crying, here, take this,” I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small plastic toy I got from a gacha machine near the train station. I wasn’t sure if Daiki would like it, but it seemed he did; he stopped crying and looked excited.    “Daiki said this one is rare; the boys at school are competing to collect these.”

“Oh, that’s good, then we’ll be going now. Take care of your health, both Mom and Saito, I’ll try to visit often,” I said with a smile to Mom and Saito standing beside her. As I was about to leave, the chubby kid hugged me. I looked down at him making a pouty face, holding on tight as if he didn’t want me to go. I could only hug the stubborn kid back, and after a while, Mom had to pull him away again.

“Have a safe trip,” Mom said, looking at all of us.

“Yes.”

I walked back to sit inside the car, then saw Mom come over to say something to Phii Fah, but I was inside the car and couldn’t hear, nor did I dare to eavesdrop. I’d ask later. Then Phii Fah opened the driver’s side door and got in.

   “What did Mom say?”

“Oh, she just said thank you and asked me to take care of you.”

“Oh, and…what did Phii Fah reply?”

“I promised that…”

“…”

“I would protect and take care of her son with my life.”

SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 33: Shooting Star

   “So, you actually did it, right?” I asked the person in front of me, in a disheveled student uniform. Tiger had just come to our faculty with copies of Uncle Rati’s fake evidence to show us. I asked for them because I wanted to see what fake evidence he had used.

“Meaning? The eye thing?”

“Uh.”

“Really did it.”

“He’s in the hospital now, right?”

“Uh-huh.”

“He can’t see with that eye anymore?”

“Are you asking this because you feel guilty?” Tiger sat down on the sofa opposite me, Jo spoke up, “No need to feel bad, Phii, it’s my job.”    “Uh,” I nodded in understanding. After that incident, it made me think a bit, “If I had stopped it that day, what would have happened?”    “I would have gone home to get scolded by my dad for disobeying orders, and he would have sent someone else to do it anyway,” Tiger explained. I nodded again. I realized that even if I had stopped it, it wouldn’t have changed anything.

The fault of using fake evidence to deceive the mafia doesn’t go away just because I tried to stop it.

The reason I didn’t stop it back then was because of this; stopping it would have been futile, my opinion doesn’t matter. Besides, as Tiger said, even if Tiger didn’t do it, someone else would have been sent.    “But honestly. Even if you had stopped me, I probably would have done it anyway. I’m asking out of curiosity. Just wanted to know what you would have done.”

“Why?”

“I can’t disobey my dad’s orders.”

“Ha, you’re such a good boy,” Jo teased.

“As usual,” Tiger said before standing up from the sofa, ready to leave.

“Hey, Phii,” I turned to Jo as if I just remembered something.

“What?”

“I heard he was sending people to deal with North?”

“Hmm”

“You should have told me earlier, the wound on North’s face, was that what he was doing too?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, that bastard,” Tiger immediately showed signs of irritation,

“Bullying North affects many people, he doesn’t think before he acts.” Tiger cursed in frustration before walking out of the room. We were now in a private room at a coffee shop near the faculty.

“What does that mean?” I turned to ask Jo.

“Because North is friends with a kid named Duennao, I guess.” “Winter?” I raised an eyebrow, recalling that name from that day.    “The kid that Tiger has had a crush on for years, but that’s all there is to it,” Jo shrugged indifferently. Knowing this much, I didn’t feel the need to ask further, looking at the document envelope in my hand and opening it. The forged evidence that Uncle Rati had given them was no small matter. Whether it was cars or land, if these documents were fake as Tiger claimed, they had every right to be angry. It wasn’t just about disrespect; it was also about defrauding their money.    For example, if you have one car, you can use it as collateral to borrow one million baht. But Uncle Rati used fake documents to claim he had four cars when he only had one, so he got four million. One million was legitimate because he had one car, but the other three million were essentially borrowed without any collateral.

And when it comes to seizing assets because the debt can’t be paid, there’s no car to seize, and those three million could just vanish.    “Let me see,” Jo said. I handed him the documents. He glanced at them briefly before putting them down, “Serves him right, Tiger’s father hates being deceived.”    “Can we call them mafia?” I asked.

“Loaning tens to twenty million. It’s not a small-time deal. Only the mafia would lend that much,” Jo said, “I totally forgot to think about it.”

“About what?”

“Even if you tried to stop it, it would be pointless. His wrongdoings wouldn’t disappear because you intervened.”

“Hmm, I know,” I sighed, Jo’s words echoing my earlier thoughts.    “If you stopped him and that bastard didn’t do it, what would he tell his father when he got home? Oh, I didn’t follow orders because some guy asked me not to? That would be ridiculous, and worse, the situation could escalate if his father got upset.”    “Hmm, I understand, but…then why ask me?”

“He was testing you.”

“Hmm?”

“He wanted to see how you’ll handle it, seeing that you’re new. He probably wants to know what you’ll do in situations like this.”

“And how did it go?”

“I think he’s pleased with you, if you work with him next time, it might be easier.”

“Oh, uh…but I’m not doing it anymore.”    “Why?” Jo furrowed his brows at me.

“I don’t really like this kind of work, I’ll probably sell the shares to you,” I said according to my thoughts. This was my first time in business or dealing with stocks. Of course, Jo had been guiding me all along, but once I tried it, I realized it wasn’t something I enjoyed much.

“Is that smart? You’ve been doing well. You’ve made quite a profit in just a few months.”

“Uh, yeah. So, do you want the shares? You can be chairman instead of me.”

“Enough,” Jo said, “I’ve got my hands full already, ask Hill.”    “Hmm?” Hill looked up from his sheet and turned his attention to us, “What?”

“Fah wants to sell the company shares, are you interested in being chairman instead?”

“What company?”

“Real estate,” I replied.

“Oh,” Hill was silent for a while, his face showing his usual indifference. In truth, Hill’s father and Jo’s father know each other because they do business together. Hill’s family has a rather large company, and Hill is set to inherit it. As I’ve mentioned before, he doesn’t really want to study medicine; he was forced by his grandfather, who had an unfulfilled dream of becoming a doctor, so he imposed that dream on Hill.

“Might be good, let me see first.”

There were only the three of us in the room now.

I sighed, thinking of Arthit who is currently in California, feeling an indescribable concern. During New Year, we agreed not to contact Arthit until he contacts us himself or, if there’s no sign from him after the tenth, then we would reach out. So, I’ve been trying to handle all the work and legal matters for him.

“Oh, right, the thing you asked for,” Jo said, pulling some documents out of his pocket and handing them to me. I took them immediately, “About Phoon’s biological mother that you asked me to look into.”

After the incident with Uncle Rati, I had asked Jo to help find information on Phoon’s real mother.

“Thanks,” I said, my eyes still glued to the details in the document.

Name: Nakamura, Yuri (Original surname: Yoshida)    Original surname?

   So, Phoon’s mother remarried then…

   “Wow, Japanese.”

“Is the cat half-Japanese?”

“Not quite, his mother is half-Japanese too.”

“So, that makes him twenty-five percent Japanese,” North said, looking at the information about my mother with interest.

…

Typhoon

   The day before, Phii Fah came back to the room looking a bit worried, seeming to hesitate for a while before handing me the documents about my mother. The first time I saw her picture, I cried. All kinds of emotions mixed together until I wasn’t sure what they were, but certainly, they weren’t negative.

The document included a photo, her name, both her maiden and married surnames, her birth year, and various details about her life. It mentioned the schools she attended, the awards she received in school, and it said that after my mother finished high school, my grandmother passed away. At eighteen, she came to Thailand, stayed for just over two years before returning to start anew in Japan, working in various jobs until she remarried and had children.    “The information is very detailed,” Ter said. We were now at

Daotok’s room because it was a holiday. We gathered here because Ter said that around New Year’s, Daotok had disappeared, completely out of touch, and the last he heard, Dao was going to the New Year count down alone with a mountain of work. After New Year’s, they decided to visit out of concern, fearing he might really be swamped by work.

But contrary to expectations, Dao looked more cheerful than the last time we met.    “By the way, Dao.”

“What?”

“You look more cheerful,” I commented. Daotok, who was looking at the document in North’s hand, turned to me with a smile.

“I went on a meditation retreat.”

“…Seriously?” North furrowed his brows and turned to ask the person next to him. Right now, the three of them were intensely focused on the documents about my mother, so they all leaned in to look together.

“Uh.”

“Was it around New Year?” Ter asked.

“Yes.”

“Are you into spirituality or something? I just found out,” North said.

“Not really,” Daotok shook his head slightly, “I not really into that, but last year, I was working too much, to the point where…how should I say it, I was scattered, couldn’t focus on anything, everything was a mess, it made me unable to concentrate on work, so I went to practice meditation.”

“Did it help?” I asked.

“It was good, at least it felt like a break, gave me the energy to get back to work.”

“You’re crazy, no matter how hard I work, I’ve never thought of going to meditate,” North said before turning his attention back to the document in his hand, “Uh, came to Thailand at eighteen, why?”    “Because your grandmother is Thai,” Daotok said, “Here. Your grandfather was Japanese, but he passed away when your mom was still a child.”

“Oh, so it’s like coming back to her mother’s homeland, because her dad died young so she probably had nowhere else to go,” North remarked, “But wait, Phoon, how old are you?”

“Twenty.”

“Your mom is now thirty-nine.”

“Uh, she had me when she was nineteen,” I said. After coming to Thailand at eighteen, she met my father and then had me. It’s hard to say, but nineteen isn’t exactly the age to be ready for a child, “I’m afraid I might not be the child she was ready to have.”

“Stop overthinking, or I’ll hit you.”

“Why are you being harsh on me again?”

“Ready or not, she loves you. If she didn’t love you, she would have aborted you, and she still sends you gifts every year. Besides, doesn’t your name and hers have similar meanings?” I couldn’t help but laugh at North’s hot-headed demeanor; while saying this, he didn’t even look up at me.

“Hm?”

“Yuri means lily, Ren means lotus.”

“Oh,” I nodded, I hadn’t thought about it until now. Ren is the name written on the gift box that was sent to me, which we’re now more than ninety percent sure was sent by my mother, and it seems to be the name she gave me before I became known as Typhoon.

“Ren-kun,” North teased.

“You’re crazy with the ‘kun’,” I retorted.

“Speaking of which, your mom was a good student. Look at this.”    “North, are you still on the first page?” I asked because my mother’s educational record was on the first page. Had he really been looking at that for so long?

“Yeah, North, why are you looking so intently? There are several pages of documents.”

“Hey, it’s my friend’s mom’s story, I want to know,” North said,

“She was even the class president. She’s no ordinary woman.”    “Sigh,” I exhaled for some reason, scanning Daotok’s room. It wasn’t my first time here, but every time I come, I’m still amazed by how grandly the room is decorated. Every poster of Ter is hand-drawn by Dao, and there are plenty of Dao’s work tools. There’s a large desk for drawing, with paints arranged in layers.

“By the way, what do you do on a meditation retreat?” I asked,

“How many days did you go?”

“Three days, nothing much, just observing the eight precepts, chanting, stuff like that.”

“Did you go alone?”

“Yeah.”

“You should invite North next time.”

“Wow…damn, what are you thinking, asking seriously,” North said, sounding annoyed, “And Phoon, are you okay with your mom having a new family?”

“I’m okay with it. She got a new start in life, which is good, and there’s someone to take care of her. Flip to the next page, her son is really cute.”

“You’re so noble,” North said, flipping the page as I suggested,

“Who’s this kid next to the soy sauce bottle?”

“That’s Daiki, he’s eight. I thought he looked like the kid on the ‘Healthy Child’ soy sauce bottle. I don’t know what my mom fed him to make him look so chubby.”    “Hmm,” I nodded slightly.

“You have to be careful. If you cause trouble for her new family, you’ll feel guilty forever, Phoon,” North said. I nodded again in agreement. If things went too far beyond me just meeting my mother, it would be terrible. More importantly, I don’t want to hurt my mother’s new family.

Just contacting her secretly should be fine. If my mother isn’t okay with meeting me, I’ll accept that, and I must ensure that her new family doesn’t find out.

“Maybe your mom has already told her new family that she had a child,” North said, “That would be good, then Daiki could really be your younger brother.”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“It’s good that you finally know who your mother is,” Daotok said with a sweet smile, “It’s like a New Year’s gift.”

“Yeah, it’s really a great gift.”    “By the way,” Dao spoke up.

“What?” I asked.

“Tell us about your father, we seem to be out of the loop,” Daotok said, “Can you tell us?”

“Oh, I can tell you,” I said, because Dao wouldn’t go telling anyone anyway. I started from when North was punched by my father and punched back, then recounted the events in the warehouse that Phii Fah had told me about. When I first heard this story, I was shocked, shocked that Phii Fah was the shareholder of the company, that my father had embezzled three million from the company, and that he had used fake evidence to deceive the mafia.

In truth, I couldn’t help but worry. I recently asked Phii Fah how my father was doing, and Phii Fah had to ask someone else, probably the mafia. He said my father’s condition had improved a lot. All I could do was ask about his condition, hoping he would recover soon and start a better new life.

At least, what I know, not counting his philandering and having many other affairs, he has had three wives and three children. He chose to abandon my mother because of his infidelity, then left Fan’s mother for the same reason, and Aunt Prae ran away because he cheated on her. At least with these three women who loved him, he never thought to cherish them; instead, he hurt them.

If possible, I’d like him not to deceive anyone else, to work and pay off his debts completely, so he doesn’t find himself in danger. Being in debt to the mafia for twenty million is not a good thing; it’s not safe, everyone knows that. With mafia debts, if you can pay it back, it’s fine, but going so far as to deceive them…When Phii Fah told me that my father used fake evidence to borrow money from the mafia, I was genuinely scared, afraid they would kill him. But it didn’t go that far; they just made him lose sight in one eye. It sounds cruel, but in reality, it’s how the mafia deals with things, it’s their world, a dangerous and ruthless one that ordinary people like us shouldn’t get involved with in the first place.

Because of what he did, he had to face this. I can’t say I feel nothing about it. I pity him. I want to be angry at those who did this to my father, but as it’s been said, it’s their way and their duty. If my father hadn’t deceived them from the start, nothing would have happened because they were just living in their own world, and we were the ones who reached into it.

North said it’s like messing with a curse; it’s in its own place. We walked into its territory ourselves, so when it harms us, it’s not really at fault.

I don’t hate or resent how things turned out. I just feel sorry and worried, but I can’t visit him. If I did, I’d likely be sent back. I thought about sending flowers to visit him in the hospital, but he would probably see it as me having ill intentions, because my father never viewed me positively.

All I can do is hope he chooses the right path. That’s all I can really do. I’ve been praying for him to have a peaceful life all along, and I’ll continue to do so because it’s the only thing I can do for him as his son, even though I’ve never received even a shred of love.

“The only thing your boyfriend did was with the shares, right? And he didn’t even withdraw them, did he?” Daotok asked. I nodded in response, “Then that’s pretty kind of him, really…uh, your dad isn’t really trustworthy, is he? With all the money fraud and using fake evidence to deceive them. If he still holds shares with them, however you look at it, your boyfriend has a high risk of incurring significant losses. As I’ve heard, if there’s a risk of loss, they usually pull out their shares first.”

“You know this well,” North said.

“My dad works at the company, really, everything he gets is the result of his own actions.”

“…Yeah, I thought Phii Fah would pull out the shares too,” North remarked.

“Do you hate Phii Tonfah?” Daotok asked.

“No, why?”

“Good, if you hated him, I’d feel sorry for him, he did all this to protect you, had only a few months to buy up the shares, it mustn’t have been easy.”

“…”

“And the one who got hurt has nothing to do with your boyfriend, how could he dare to deceive someone that scary? He’s a mafia, and there’s your boyfriend, North.”

“Huh?” North raised an eyebrow slightly, “Yeah, that’s true, but…how to say, Phii Jo is someone you can’t stop, I’m still scared when he’s angry.”

“Phii Jo was just angry that someone hurt you,” Ter said, “Not only did he hit you, but he also sent people to teach you and Phoon a lesson. That’s really cruel, sending people to teach your own child a lesson, that’s insane.”

“I know, so I never said anything. If it were me, I’d be angry if someone did something to my boyfriend.”

“Have you ever been scared of the doctors?” Daotok asked, seemingly addressing all of us, and surprisingly, we all shook our heads together, “Why is that?”

“It’s…I don’t know, hard to explain, but it just feels like there’s no place safer in the world than here. They make us believe that no matter what happens, they will never hurt us,” I said, making Daotok smile broadly.

“I already knew that, just asking,” Daotok said, “I can feel it every time everyone talks about their boyfriends, the atmosphere around becomes so warm, but since I don’t meet your boyfriends often, I don’t get to sense it much. I’ve only felt it when Phii Hill was with Ter. At that time, my heart felt all fluffy.”

“You can sense it that much?” North raised his eyebrow in question.

“Oh. Didn’t I ever tell you?”

“Tell what?” I furrowed my brows to ask, Ter also looked over with interest. Daotok made a slightly embarrassed face, as if he had accidentally said something he shouldn’t have.

“Oh. I’ll go get the laundry first.”

“Dao, you can’t change the subject like that,” I said.

“Uh…”

“How do you sense it?” Ter asked again, Dao looked even more startled.

“I just said it. Anyone can sense it, right? From the look in their eyes or something like that.”

“Ghost under the bed, are you going to say it or not?”

“Why do you think I’m lying?”

“Because you look suspicious. At first, I thought you had a sixth sense to see ghosts.”    “I don’t see them often.”

“…”

“…”

“Shit,” North said in shock, moving away from Daotok. Ter and I were also stunned, “Really? You, bastard, did you see a ghost?”    “Uh. I see one right now,” Dao said, staring at North, until North hit him on the head.    “I’m not a ghost!”

“…Ouch.”

“You deserved it, playing around at a time like this?”

“North, you shouldn’t be scared of me.”

“Get out, you see ghosts, I don’t want to play anymore.” After hitting Dao on the head, North quickly backed away, and Daotok immediately scowled at North.    “I’ll have Mary haunt North tonight.”

“Fuck off, which Mary? Bastard. No way, don’t do anything to me.” North grabbed my arm tightly. As I’ve mentioned before, North is the one most afraid of ghosts, scared to the point of hyperventilating, and apart from that, this three-foot chest guy has never been afraid of anything else.

“So, what’s the conclusion?” Ter asked to steer the conversation back to the topic. I’m not that scared of ghosts. As for Ter, he’s average, scared at a normal level.

“It’s not really a secret. Just didn’t see the need to say anything.”    “Uh-huh,” I nodded, listening intently, letting North continue to cling to my arm, his hand sweating again, for God’s sake.    “I don’t see them all the time. Just sometimes, if they want to be seen, and then…how should I put it, we’re in sync. Mostly, I feel them more.”

“Feel ghosts?” Ter asked.

“No, no, feel emotions. Like when we first met. I could feel that

Phoon was sad, it was a sadness that almost made me cry.”

“Oh…”

“And then I could feel…the longing of another person, all around

Phoon.”

“…Fan?”

“Hmm, probably. I haven’t seen her, but I can feel it. It’s warmth, longing, concern, and sadness, all the same.”

“…Really?” I bit my lip hard hearing that, “And now?”

“She’s not here anymore.”

“Oh…” I let out a small sigh, feeling relieved. Fan must really be gone now. I don’t have to worry or be concerned about my matters anymore, “And why didn’t Dao tell us?”

“I felt she didn’t want me to.”

“Oh.”

“But now you have nothing but happiness. I can feel it.”    “Are you messing with us?” North furrowed his brows, “You need evidence. Otherwise, I won’t believe it.”

“Not believing is fine,” Daotok said with a smile, “But when it comes to fortune-telling, you believe everything.”

“Yeah, that’s right, it’s not strange if Dao has some kind of sense. When it comes to fortune-telling, you believe with all your heart, don’t you?” Ter said, turning to look at North. North let go of my arm and immediately made a sour face.

“You’re accurate, that’s why,” North said, sounding annoyed, “Fine,

I’ll believe it. And here…are there any ghosts?”

“Probably not.”

“Oh, okay, good. It’s like having a ghost scanner. When you have time, check my room for any, I’m scared there might be something.”

“But my senses are very weak.”

“Come on, safety first.”

“It should be fine, remember when North gave me Phii Jo’s birthdate to read, and I said their fortunes complement each other?” Daotok said. North nodded in acknowledgment. So, he even looked at Phii Jo’s fortune…

“That’s right, so the ghost thing isn’t a problem. No one can do anything anyway.”

“Oh, okay, good. Have you guys ever had your fortunes read?”    “Ter has, his and Phii Hill’s fortunes complement each other. Do you want to see yours?”

“Huh? Oh. No, better not, I’m afraid they might not match, and I’ll just worry for nothing.”

“Oh, okay,” Daotok nodded and didn’t ask further. Honestly, I wasn’t surprised by what Daotok said, probably because it’s Daotok; even if he could shoot lasers from his eyes, it wouldn’t be strange.    We asked Dao a little more about Fan. Daotok said that when I decided to tell everyone everything, and everyone was comforting me not to cry, Fan was there too, and she was also crying while hugging me. Dao mentioned he doesn’t see Fan every time he sees me because sometimes she’s not around. He doesn’t know where she goes, but I think she might go to find our parents. And the reason Fan didn’t want Dao to tell me about her, Dao thinks it’s because she didn’t want me to keep thinking about her, which is true. If I had known at that time that Fan was still around, I wouldn’t have been able to do anything.

“Uh, Dao.”

“Hmm?”

“Do you remember when we had a gathering and video called each other, and you asked who the woman behind Phii Arthit was?” I asked when I suddenly remembered Dao teasing me like that. We had a big discussion about whether Dao was just joking or if it was true, but now it might actually be true.

“When was that?”

“Come on, during the gathering, when we video called, you pointed out the woman behind the person sitting opposite us.”

“…Don’t remember.”

“Damn, you’ve got selective memory, my friend.”

“Uh, but I was probably just teasing.”

“Why?”

“If I really saw something, I wouldn’t tell anyone, afraid everyone would be scared.”

“Uh, well, I’m not scared at all, you bastard,” North let out a big sigh, “I feel so uncomfortable, I’m not talking to you, Arthit, for one day.”

“…Don’t,” Daotok said softly, looking like he was about to cry.

“Hey, I was joking!”

“Oh, North, did you make Dao cry? You bastard, you’re really evil,” Ter scolded, leaving North at a complete loss.

“I’m sorry, I was just playing!”

“Ha!”

“Damn, you scared me, here! Asking for trouble with your dad?” North smacked Dao’s head again in frustration. At first, Dao looked like he was about to cry for real, and North’s face immediately paled.

North is really weak against tears, seeing this.

“You didn’t have to curse.”

“I was startled too, making you cry makes me look like a jerk, aren’t I a big enough jerk already?” North grabbed Dao’s cheeks hard, stretching them back and forth, and Dao frowned and made a sulky face.

“Ow, it hurts.”

“It’s supposed to hurt, you little ghost under the bed, trying to trick me.”

“Ouch, ouch, ouch, help!” Dao called for help and tried to block North’s hands, but he couldn’t match North’s strength. All I and Ter could do was sit and laugh at the scene in front of us.

While laughing at Dao’s attempt to get his cheeks back from North, it made me realize how good it feels when we’re all together like this.

It’s really good to have everyone like this, isn’t it?

After playing around in Dao’s room for a while, it was time to leave. North went back first, followed by Ter, leaving only me, and Phii Fah texted that he would arrive in about five minutes.

“Didn’t forget anything, right?” Daotok asked.

“Hmm. I don’t think so, I hardly brought anything with me.”

“If you manage to contact your mom, let me know, okay?”

“Okay.”

Not long after, Phii Fah texted to say he was waiting downstairs.

   “I’ll walk you down.”

“It’s okay, don’t trouble yourself.”

“It’s no trouble,” Daotok said before walking downstairs with me. When Ter and North left, Dao also walked them down. To be honest, I think Daotok is really sweet, taking great care of us.

I walked over to Phii Fah, who was leaning against his car. He immediately gave me a sweet smile.

“Hello,” Phii Fah greeted the person who followed me kindly, and Daotok smiled back.

“Hello.”

“See you,” I said as I got into the car, waving goodbye to the other person. Dao waved back. Not long after the luxurious car moved away, my phone notification sound went off.

From Daotok…

   What’s up? We just parted ways a moment ago.

   SS: There is no need to look at the stars or sense anything.

   Typhoon: What?

   SS: Just by looking into each other’s eyes, you can tell.

   SS: Between Phoon and Phii Tonfah    SS: It’s true love.

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 32: Achluophobia

   Tonfah

   I glanced at the face of the person who had just fallen asleep; his breathing was even. I reached out to gently stroke the white cheek, red around the eyes indicating he had cried a lot. Before this, about half an hour ago, Phoon was in my arms, crying while recounting his story to me.

Initially, Phoon seemed reluctant to talk much, which was expected; it’s not something Phoon would want to discuss. Otherwise, it wouldn’t have remained a secret until now.

But I talked to Phoon until I understood that his attempts to protect him no longer meant anything. Phoon told me everything from the beginning, his voice breaking with sobs, about the possibility that he might not be a legitimate child, which I had somewhat anticipated, but honestly, I didn’t want it to be true.

And something I didn’t know was about uncle Rati’s new partner, named Prae, and her daughter.

Looking at the small figure sleeping soundly, I felt an indescribable pain. Everything Phoon had told me was swirling around in my head, from childhood when Phoon was strictly disciplined by his uncle and aunt. I used to think it was because they cared, but in reality, it was just neglect.

I reached out to turn on the bedside lamp and turned off the main light in the room. Nowadays, Phoon can sleep with the lights off as long as I’m close by. His fear of the dark is quite severe; as soon as it’s completely dark, his whole body starts to go numb, his pulse and heart rate increase, and he can’t control himself. Since the last time the power went out, I realized I shouldn’t leave Phoon alone at night. The reason Phoon fears the dark and confined spaces so much is because of him.

I let out a quiet sigh to calm my anger. Knowing all this, I’m not sure if I can talk to him calmly tomorrow.

The only reason this situation is so complicated is because he’s Phoon’s father…If it weren’t for that reason, there’s no way we would try to be this calm.

Suddenly, my phone rang, and I saw it was Jo calling. I checked the time; it was about 9 PM. I slowly moved off the bed, but as soon as I removed my embrace, it seemed to wake Phoon up.

“Mmm.”

“Sorry, did I wake you?” I asked softly, and the small figure shook his head in response.    “No, is something wrong?”

“It’s just Jo calling, I’ll be right back.”

“…Okay.” Phoon, still groggy, answered. I gently stroked his head before walking out to the balcony to take the call.

“What’s up?” I asked into the phone as soon as I answered.

(I am not waiting until tomorrow afternoon now.)

   “Why?”

(They said he is sending someone to teach North and Phoon a lesson.)

   “…Is that true?”

(Yeah, he really ordered someone.)

   “Uh, where do we meet tomorrow?”

(Tomorrow, go out with North.)

   “Why?”

(North is worried Phoon might be angry about him punching your dad.)

   “Oh, Phoon won’t be angry, that’s fine, Phoon with North will keep his mind off things.”

(Then meet at the mall, at 1:00 PM, bring Phoon along.)    “Okay.” And then the other party hung up. Listening to it, it seems like no one can stop Jo now. He said he’s going to send people to hurt North and Phoon…

Hurt?

   His own child, really?

   With that man…we probably can’t talk it out anymore, can we?    So, I didn’t try to stop or question Jo. By now, Jo must have already instructed someone to take action, which means tomorrow, we won’t be sitting down for a meeting like I had planned.

   “…Phii Fah,” Phoon called my name softly while sliding open the balcony door, his face showing concern as he looked at me, “Are you okay?”

“What do you mean by ‘okay’?”

“I mean…about my dad.”

“Okay in what sense?” I asked back.

“Phii Fah,” Phoon called my name again, furrowing his brows with a troubled look. In truth, I had told Phoon everything, about all the preparations I had made. Phoon didn’t say anything against me; he’s very kind, one of the kindest people, but he doesn’t see the world through rose-colored glasses, he sees it as it is. So, Phoon understands why things are like this, “Tomorrow…what’s going to happen? It will be just talking, right?”

“It won’t just be talking anymore.”

“…”

“Because he hurt North and you understand me and Jo, right?” I gently stroked the other’s cheek and hair. I had said before that the hardest thing was Phoon’s feelings because he’s his father. I asked again, but I knew Phoon understood well; he nodded slightly.

“Can’t it be, Phii Fah?”

“Huh?”

“I understand that this is what he deserves because it’s the result of his actions. In truth, North is the last person in the world he should have hurt.”

“No,” I said, “Phoon, you’re the same. The last person in the world he should have touched.” My words made the person in front of me look up at me, then slowly come to hug me gently. I reached out to embrace the small figure.

“…Thank you.”

“Hm?”

“To protect…”

“Yes. It’s okay, and about what I said earlier?”

“Well…can’t it be, Phii Fah? If something violent happens…” Phoon spoke, leaving the sentence unfinished, but I understood immediately,

“Can’t it be, Phii Fah?”

“Yes, I understand,” I agreed, “but…”

“But?”

“I won’t stop it.”

“…”

“Is that okay?”

“Yes, I understand,” Phoon nodded slightly. He must have asked that because he didn’t want me to be the one to hurt his father, but if it was someone else, Phoon understood. It was a consequence of his own actions.

“Tomorrow, go out with North.”

“Hm? Me and North?”

“Yes, go to the mall.”

“Ah…okay,” said Phoon. I guess Phoon wasn’t too comfortable with what Jo and I will do, but there was nothing to be done about it now. If it had just been me, it wouldn’t have been so severe, at most we would have followed our plan, but once Jo got angry…it wouldn’t end easily.

   It’s his own doing, isn’t it…

   …

I dropped Phoon off at the mall as arranged, where North and Phoon were going to watch a movie together before Jo and I dealt with this matter. I drove following Jo to a place I wasn’t very familiar with, a large area full of warehouses. As soon as we got out of the car, men in suits came out to greet us, bowing as we passed before we stopped at the door of an inner warehouse where someone opened it for us.    Nothing was too surprising. Inside the dimly lit medium-sized warehouse, with light coming only from above, was surrounded by bodyguards. In the middle, a man was bound, kneeling with his hands tied behind his back. Even though he was unconscious and had his head down, you could tell he had been beaten badly without even looking closely.

“Surprised?” Jo asked as he sat down in a chair in front of the man.

One of the bodyguards gestured for me to sit in the chair next to him.    “Not much, I expected it,” I said honestly. I wasn’t surprised or shocked to see Uncle Rati in that state; he must have been beaten until he passed out, but probably not for long, maybe just two hours.

Looking at the wounds, they weren’t minor; his temple and eyebrows were cut by something sharp, his face was bruised all over, and although not visible under the cloth, judging by the state of his clothes, he must have had more than a few wounds. His nose and mouth were bleeding enough to choke him.

I glanced at the person next to me, who lit a cigarette and exhaled gray smoke.

“You’re smoking again?” I asked, remembering he was supposed to quit when North asked.

“North gave me a smoking quota,” Jo said. You could tell he was trying to calm himself down, “Seems like we have a little problem.”    “What?” I asked.

“Well…the people that bastard borrowed money from.”

“Hmm?” I raised my eyebrows slightly at Jo. I already knew about him borrowing money; after all, I was behind it, “They’re not happy, huh?”

“Uh, not surprising,” Jo said. I nodded in understanding, “But there’s a slight problem.”

“Who?”

“You’ll find out soon,” before Jo stood up from his chair, pressing his cigarette against the forehead of the man kneeling, using it like an ashtray. The man screamed loudly in pain, his eyes wide with shock.

“What?”

“Aaahh! You…who are you?!!” The man on his knees shouted after screaming in pain from the cigarette burn, his face pale with fear. Asking who Jo was suggested that Jo had just arrived too. Then he turned to see me. “Khun…Tonfah? Tonfah, help me, these guys kidnapped me…” That face twisted and cried for help, but strangely, it didn’t make me feel any pity.

“What do you want! Are you their leader!! Do you know who I am, huh?!!” He tried to threaten back, but Jo just sneered and looked at him with disdain before lifting his foot and kicking the man’s face hard.    “Ahhh!!”

“Watch your words.”

I had warned that if Jo was angry, no one would dare to stop him.

   Heavy breathing came from the person in front of me.

   “F…Fah,” Uncle Rati looked at me as if seeking help again,

“What…what is this?”

Before I could say anything, the warehouse door opened, and someone new walked in. He was wearing a black jacket, hands in his pockets, looking rather displeased.

   This guy…if I’m not mistaken…

   Tiger…

   “Why schedule today, don’t you know I have business?” the newcomer said immediately, scanning the room without surprise, walking closer and stopping his gaze on the man sitting there. “Wow, you’ve messed up my debtor pretty badly.”    Ah…so this is the guy Jo was talking about.

“Get to the point,” Jo said.

“I have two reasons to be here,” Tiger said with a bored expression, “One, this bastard is my debtor. I can’t let you do whatever you want with him. Two, it’s about the company.”

“Annoying,” Jo grumbled, looking at me with slight disapproval. “I told you he’s trouble.”

Uncle Rati, who seemed not to know Tiger, looked between the three of us before forcing a smile.

   “Uh, you’re the son of the person I borrowed money from, right? You have to protect me! If something happens to me, who will pay you back?! Go on, deal with them, and I’ll give you the money, more, aaaaah!!” Tiger kicked the back of the head of the man sitting on the ground, then stepped on his head when he fell, pressing down hard until the man screamed loudly.

“Aaah, let…let go, let go, please, uh, I beg you, eeeek!” Before he let go, I heard that he wasn’t very good at his job behind the scenes, which must be true.

“You talk too much,” Tiger remarked.

“Watch your words, this isn’t your place,” I warned when I saw the man in front of me about to speak again, his lip already split, having been dealt with by both Jo and Tiger. Why does he still think he has the right to say anything? Uncle Rati’s face turned pale, and more tears flowed, perhaps because he saw that even I, an acquaintance, wasn’t going to help him.

   “Sniff, sniff, what, what is this all about?!” His voice trembled with fear, looking at me with shaking eyes while trying to speak loudly to mask his cowardice. I sat back, observing him, my hands clasped and elbows resting on my knees.

“Where should we start?” I said, looking towards Jo. He turned to grab some documents from a nearby bodyguard and handed them to me. “Let’s start with this.” I tossed the documents to the floor, letting the man kneeling there look at them in confusion.

“What…what, what is this?!” The first document I showed him was evidence of him embezzling money from the company he worked for, and of course, the person recently appointed as the new chairman was me.

It took just over a month, with Jo’s connections helping, to buy up the company’s shares, and now I am officially the chairman.    “You embezzled three million baht from our company. As the chairman, I’m firing you and taking legal action. After this goes to court, you won’t end up well,” I said in a calm tone. Hearing this, Uncle Rati looked even more shocked.

“Huh, Ch…Chairman?? Tonfah? How…how did you become the chairman?” His split lip bled as he spoke, so much blood that several teeth must have come loose. “So…so the call yesterday…”

“Yes,” I smirked.

“Because of this, you had me brought here then?!”    “No, because of the person you hurt yesterday, don’t you understand?”    “…Ty…Typhoon?!”

“You might not know…that he’s my lover,” I said. It seemed that Uncle Rati couldn’t handle this level of shock very well. “Including the other person you hurt.”

“You’re quite bold, daring to touch someone else’s important person,” I said with a chilling calm, his face full of fear and tears still flowing, probably understanding now that he shouldn’t have meddled with anyone, “Are you going to teach me a lesson, then?”    “No…no. Not that. Not what I meant…hey, hey!! stop, what, what are you going to do, stop it!!” He protested when Jo looked at the bodyguards, two of whom approached to untie the ropes. Despite his resistance, it was futile; they pulled his hands forward, and Jo stepped on them, crushing them hard.

“Aaah, aaah!! ugh!! uh!!!” He kept looking at his hands being crushed, screaming at the top of his lungs, unable to pull them away. I lowered my eyes slightly before letting out a sigh, hearing the sound of bones moving under the pressure. Even though I wasn’t very surprised, this was the first time I’d been here, and the person being tormented was someone I knew.

“You won’t be able to use your right hand for a while, in exchange for punching my boyfriend and planning to send someone to teach them a lesson,” Jo said with a tone of indifference amidst the loud screams of pain, releasing his foot to see the hand trembling and slightly twisted. I guessed that the bones in that hand were definitely broken; at least he wouldn’t be able to use his right hand for several months, “Make him shut up.”

“Ah!” One of the bodyguards slapped the man who wouldn’t stop screaming, sending him flying to the side. Without any chance to recover, he was bound again.

“I feel a bit bad for you,” Jo turned to me, “You shouldn’t have seen this.”

“It’s fine,” I said honestly.

“Okay with this, huh? At least he’s your father-in-law.”

“No, do whatever you want.”

“I thought you’d try to stop me a bit.”

“I won’t do anything, and I won’t stop you either,” I said, recalling what I had discussed with Phoon last night, that no matter how violent things got, as long as it wasn’t because of me, it was okay.

“Oh.”

“If he dies, who will pay back the debt?” Tiger, who had been silent for a while, spoke up, having been seen playing on his phone earlier, likely chatting with someone, looking quite relaxed in such a situation, which was believable.

“So, you’re here to protect him?”

“Phii Jo, Phii Fah…I have to work, Dad sent me.”

“Have you Mister Tiger become tame for your dad?” Jo’s mocking words didn’t seem to affect the listener much.

“I’ll pay back three million,” the soft voice of the man who had just been forced back into a kneeling position rose, accompanied by heavy breathing and sobbing, “…uh, we’ll fight this in court, won’t we? You should let me go then, huh? You have to protect me. Otherwise, you’ll never get back your twenty million.” He looked towards Tiger. Of course, the person being spoken to didn’t look pleased, but he just shrugged helplessly.

“It’s true. I’ll have to ask you guys to stop. If he dies, the money he borrowed to start the company will be wasted. Then I won’t get either the principal or the interest,” Tiger said, trying to remain calm. I nodded in understanding because Uncle Rati had borrowed money from this kid’s father’s company to start his own.

“Exactly! I was about to become the chairman of a big company! Being fired, so what? Being sued, so what? You guys will definitely get it back from me!”

“You’ll never build your company if I withdraw my shares. You’ll just be a bankrupt man with debts over twenty million, facing a lawsuit for embezzling at least five million from the original company. No one will do business with you anymore. Not even a job will be available for you,” I said with the calmest and coldest voice possible, causing the arrogant man’s face to pale again.

“Withdraw shares? Withdraw shares, huh, are you crazy?! You have shares in my company…” Then he fell silent as if he had just realized something, “Or…or you…”

“Yes,” I smirked, “Behind all the shares you thought were supporting you, all of them are mine. You, who thought you had so much power, all of that is mine.”

“…”

“Aren’t you surprised at all why your partners were so supportive of you building a new company and suggested you borrow twenty million? Didn’t you wonder at all why the loan company would lend money to someone like you without any collateral?” My explanation left the man in front of me stunned, his face shocked to the point of nearly fainting.

The story began with gradually buying up the shares of the company where Uncle Rati worked until I became the chairman. Initially, I didn’t plan to fire him, just some small things like if he wanted to do anything, we could control him because he held a high position in the company. No matter what, he wouldn’t willingly give up that position. By chance, we found out he had embezzled nearly three million from the company, leading me to wonder what he was doing with that money.

It turned out he wanted to save money to build his own company, which made things even easier. Jo sent some people to help with this investment, and all the partnership money was mine, even though my name wasn’t on it. I held more than half of the shares in the new company Uncle Rati wanted to build.

Building a company requires a lot of money. Of course, Uncle Rati didn’t have enough. We told him if he wanted to be the chairman, he needed to own more than half of the shares. That’s why he decided to borrow money. Naturally, someone like him without any collateral wouldn’t get loans for millions anywhere, except with a guarantor like Jo, and borrowing from where Jo had arranged.

I told you if he behaved well, it would be good for him. We would continue to invest as shareholders in the company, and he would get everything he wanted, including us profiting from that investment, meaning the business would run smoothly. But if he did something bad, we would just pull out our shares. The result of pulling out the shares would be his company going bankrupt. As the chairman, he would be responsible for everything that happens, all the assets we had his mortgage would be gone, and he would be left with nothing but almost thirty million in debt. Not to mention his reputation or social standing. He wouldn’t even be able to work as a regular company employee because of the fraud case hanging over him.    Moreover, the creditors are not that kind-hearted, especially since he borrowed from quite ruthless underground lenders. If he doesn’t pay back quickly, one can easily guess what could happen; he might be forced to find the money somehow, in the worst case, perhaps by selling himself or his organs.

I told you, it’s all because of his own actions…

“You! you!. It’s you all!. You tricked me into borrowing money, made me use my house, land, car, everything as collateral!. You’re evil!. You tricked me!! uh.”

“We only advised, if you had stayed apart from Phoon, things wouldn’t have ended like this.”

“Typhoon, huh?! Ha!! that kid again, huh?! bastard!!” Before he could finish speaking, Jo ordered the bodyguards to silence him immediately. I took a deep breath to suppress the anger rising within me; if I let him finish talking about Phoon, I would find it hard to bear.

“You promised Phoon you wouldn’t do anything, right?”    “Uh,” I nodded slightly.

“Did you hear that?” Jo asked, Uncle Rati, who could only open one eye, slowly looked up, “Thanks to Khun Phoon. Lucky that Phoon asked for this. Do you know what? If you weren’t Phoon’s father, I wouldn’t let you out of here breathing anymore.” Jo’s words had an effect; he clenched his teeth to suppress his fear and resentment, feeling his dignity trampled upon, having to rely on Phoon for protection.

“Uh, sorry. I’m sorry, please…let me go, I give up, I give up everything, uh.” He bowed his head to the ground, apologizing, realizing he had nothing left, what we were witnessing now was just the end of an arrogant man intoxicated with power, “Sorry, uh. I’m sorry, don’t do anything to me.”

“The person you should apologize to isn’t us,” I said, looking at him with pity, “It should be the one you’ve been hurting for years.”    “Uh, uh,” he sobbed, but it was meaningless now, “I’m Phoon’s father. I’m his father, don’t do anything to me…uh.”

“So that’s what a father is?” I gritted my teeth to suppress my anger. Why is this man so despicable? He only calls himself a father when he needs to save his own skin.    “Pathetic,” Jo swore in frustration.

“Huh…I’ll do anything…please, don’t do anything else to me, sniff, don’t withdraw the shares, please. I have nothing left, sniff, sob. I can’t pay back twenty million.”

“…”

“Sniff, you…” He turned to look at Tiger with tears streaming down his face, “Please, help me. If I don’t continue with the company, you won’t get your money back either.”

“…Sigh, that’s true,” Tiger sighed and then turned to speak to me, “If you withdraw the shares, he won’t be able to make money, my company will suffer a huge loss. Even if we sell him or his organs, it would take forever to get the money back, my father would kill me.

Plus, I can’t threaten his son, right?”    “Yeah,” Jo answered.

“Are you satisfied yet?” I asked Jo, who shrugged slightly. “Then let’s make a deal.”

“…Sniff, sob, go on, say it.”

“All of this is a lesson for messing with our boyfriends,” I said, eyeing all his injuries. After being beaten like this, he’ll be in the hospital for a long time, and his right hand, which was stepped on, might never function the same. “I won’t withdraw the shares if you agree to stop bothering Phoon.”

“Uh…sniff, sob, okay, okay. I won’t bother him anymore.”

“Divorce Prae, and stop interfering with her and her daughter too.”

“…Mmm, okay. Agreed.”

“Apologize to Phoon for everything that’s happened. I know you can never be a good father, so the only opportunity you have now is to apologize and disappear from Phoon’s life. After that, I’ll take care of him myself.”

“Mmm, sob, I…understand, and…then, can you let me go now, sniff?” I looked at Jo for an answer.

“Yeah, I’m okay now, he’s been taught enough,” Jo said. It should be satisfying enough, having beaten him almost to death. “Only because he’s Phoon’s father. Otherwise, this wouldn’t be the end.”

“Th…thank you, thank you…sniff”

“Yeah. We’re done here, right?” Tiger spoke up.

“Uh, the shares won’t be withdrawn,” I answered.

“Okay, so that means the first reason I came here is settled, but I have another reason.”    “What?” Jo asked.

“Well, it’s about the creditor and debtor issue,” Tiger reached into his shirt pocket, pulling out a crumpled piece of paper, unfolding it to look at it before placing it in front of Uncle Rati. As soon as he saw the paper, his crying intensified.    “Sorry, I…I can explain, please.”

“You were quite bold to use fake evidence to deceive us,” said the man with a cold smile, Jo raised an eyebrow slightly.

“He used fake evidence?”

“Uh, most of the evidence used for the collateral is real, but this one is fake. Do you know how angry Dad was? If we didn’t teach you a lesson, you wouldn’t learn what happens when you deceive us,” Tiger said, slightly raising his eyebrows, “That was an order.”    “Uh, uh, sorry. I’m sorry, please…don’t do anything to me, I beg you.”

“Really asking for trouble,” Jo muttered with a hint of pity. I sighed before standing up; this was no longer my concern. Using fake evidence with underground creditors known for their ruthlessness, it’s no wonder he provoked such anger. It’s no different from insulting them.

“Hey, is he Phoon’s father?” Tiger turned to ask Jo.

“Uh.”

“Is Phoon close with Nao?”

“Probably not.”

“Oo…kay,” before Tiger let out a playful smile. I secretly felt a chill run down my spine, seeing him borrowing a knife from the bodyguard beside me. Once the knife was in his hand, the person facing the blade’s edge cried even harder, panicking, “Phoon can save you from these two, but he can’t save you from me.”

“No…no, uh, you…you, what, what are you going to do?”    “Leaving one eye to see is enough. Don’t worry, I won’t gouge it out; I find it too disgusting.”    “Please…please, I beg you, please.”

“Will you stop me? Seeing he’s your wife’s father,” Tiger said, glancing at me. Beside him, there was someone sending a desperate look, pleading for help with all his might.

“Fah…Fah, please help your me, I beg you…I’ve already done wrong, please…I’ve realized my mistake…please, please, I beg you, sniff, sob.”

“If you don’t stop him, this bastard will definitely be blind,” Jo said in a calm voice. Even without saying it, I knew Tiger wasn’t just bluffing; because Tiger didn’t know Uncle Rati like we did, to him, he was just another debtor. Plus, Tiger had said it was an order earlier, and going against that order would bring significant trouble. I looked at the person begging with an indifferent gaze. I understood well that in this situation, stopping it would be meaningless. He was dealing with the mafia, fully aware of how dangerous it was, and what could I do to help? Would his wrongs be forgiven just because I intervened? No way. The question Tiger asked was rhetorical. I felt it was a question that didn’t actually require an answer, just asked for the sake of asking.

“Do you know Phoon is afraid of the dark?”

“…Sniff”

“Because of you.”

“…Sniff, sob”

“You should try it too, maybe you’ll understand how scary the darkness can be.”

With those final words, I turned my back and walked out of the warehouse. The horrifying scream echoed from behind, but I paid no attention, walking out to my car and immediately calling someone.    (Yes?), the cheerful voice from the other end made me smile involuntarily.

“What’s my little one doing? Have you eaten?”

(Just finished watching a movie with North, haven’t eaten anything yet.)

   “Then I’ll come pick you up. Tell North that Jo is coming too,” I said as I saw Jo following me out.

(Okay, I will wait.)

   “Yes.”

SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 31: The End of My Rope

   After our trip to Japan ended, of course, I felt a profound sense of regret. I really loved this trip. Whether it was the places, the people, the atmosphere, especially the person I went with, this trip not only allowed us to spend more time together but also created good memories for us. Although it’s a pity, since Phii Fah said he would take me traveling again, not just here, but to many other places as well.

It seems snow started falling after we returned. We celebrated New Year’s with my uncle and aunt. I was happy to celebrate with them; it was filled with simple warmth. My New Year didn’t start with loneliness like the previous years.

Just two days after the New Year’s celebration, the new semester began. I decided to drop out of university because I intended to take a gap year. I had wanted to drop out for a long time but never found the right chance, and now, with the new semester, I decided to do it. Of course, the one who complained the most was Ter, but he understood.

He was just complaining for the sake of it.

While I was studying for the entrance exam, it reminded me of the past when I was still determined to become a doctor. Because I wasn’t that good to begin with, each time I studied and tried to memorize the content, it was very difficult, and since it wasn’t for my own dream, it was even more torturous. But this time, thinking about taking the exam to study photography, I found much more motivation to study.    Just thinking about being surrounded by friends who love photography. We would talk about cameras and go out to take photos often, definitely. Just the thought of it was fun.

I have about two months until the exam, I’ve covered all the material, and now I just need to practice with past papers. I’ve been doing well on the practice tests, and wherever I make mistakes, Phii Fah is there to help.

After coming back from Japan, Phii Fah told me to move in with him at his condo, and without waiting for my answer, he had my stuff moved there. Inside Phii Fah’s room, there are now my belongings too, including the plants I used to grow on the rooftop, which I had to ask the aunt from the dorm to take care of. Some were brought to the balcony of the room, and one corner of the room has become my favorite camera shelf. Phii Fah bought a new shelf so I could store my cameras more conveniently.

Another thing that makes me very happy right now is that people have been contacting me for photography jobs. I posted some photos on a page I created and asked everyone to share it, including Phii Hill, Phii Jo, and Phii Fah. My page is gaining more followers day by day.    I’ve talked to Phii Fah about taking on photography jobs after the exam, and the contact I got recently is from a clothing store asking for promotional photos. It’s a good start.

“Why are you sitting there with such a big smile?” A familiar voice came from behind me as Phii Fah approached and gave my cheek a light kiss. When I turned, I saw him in his student uniform.

“I was just thinking about photography.”

“Did you get another job offer?”

“No,” I shook my head gently, “but I was thinking about the clothing store that contacted me the other day. I am excited to go shoot for them soon.”

“That’s good,” Phii Fah smiled warmly, “Phii Fah has to go to class now.”

“Okay, study hard, drive safely,” I said with a smile, but he seemed a bit troubled, which confused me, “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t want you to be alone.”

“Oh, it’s fine,” I replied. There’s no class for me, so I have to stay in the room, “Then I will go study outside.”

“Eh?”

“Let’s go read at the café, so when we go for dinner, you won’t have to drive back to pick me up.”

“Okay,” as he responded, I quickly got up, packed my things into my bag, changed into a t-shirt and jeans, and went outside with Phii Fah.

Initially, we planned to go to Phii Gibb’s café, but when we checked, we found it was full. Not understanding why, we had no choice but to go to another café nearby.

“It seems North and Ter finished class earlier than Phii Fah. We could meet here,” I suggested.

“Sure,” I nodded in agreement before reaching out to open the car door, but the person in the driver’s seat pulled me in first. I let out a surprised yelp before being turned to face him and kissed gently on the lips. I opened my eyes wide in shock, the soft contact lingering before he pulled away.

“Uh, um,” I was confused and didn’t know what to do. Once I gathered my senses, I felt embarrassed, biting my own lip as I still felt that sensation, my heart started beating faster, guessing my face must be red, and it seemed like Phii Fah enjoyed seeing me flustered like this.

“Study hard, if anything comes up, call me, okay?”    “Uh, okay,” I nodded slightly and quickly got out of the car, watching the luxurious white car drive away before walking into a café that wasn’t too crowded. I ordered what I wanted to eat and found a seat, arranging my books and study materials on the table.    While about to start reading, I thought of North and Ter. I immediately picked up my phone and opened the chat with Ter.

Typhoon: I’m here.

   Typhoon: Sends picture

   Typhoon: The blue café, uh, behind the university.

   Typhoon: Hurry up.

   Typhoon: I’m lonely.

   Easter: Alright, but I don’t know when the teacher will let us go.

   Easter: Lonely, huh?

   Easter: Ha!

   Typhoon: Still not over being sulky.

   Typhoon: Oh, oh.

   Easter: Enough. Not talking.

   Easter: I’ve gone to class.

   Easter: Are you studying?

   Easter: Good luck with your exam, kid.

   Typhoon: Got it!

   Typhoon: Study hard.

   Easter: sends a sticker

   I closed the chat with Ter and opened the chat with North instead.

Typhoon: I’m here.

   Typhoon: sends a picture

   Typhoon: At this sky-themed cafe, ah, behind the university.

   Typhoon: Hurry up, I’m lonely.

   North♣: Not going.

   Typhoon: Come on.

   Typhoon: Please.

   Typhoon: Please, please, please.

   North♣: Okay.

   North♣: I finish in an hour.

   North♣: If I go, I need a blended green tea.

   Typhoon: Okay.

   Then I put away my phone, focusing on studying for a long while, until suddenly there was an incoming call. I saw it was Aunt Prae, which made me smile a little because we hadn’t talked in a long time.

“Okay,” I quickly answered the call and spoke into the phone.

(Hi, are you free?)

   “I’m free, what’s up?”

(Are you near the university?)

   “I’m here, why?”

(I’m coming to see you…uh, before I knew it, I was already on my way. I want to meet you for a bit, where are you, are you free to meet?)

   “I’m at the café behind the university, the blue one.”

(Okay, I’ll come find you.)

   “Okay,” and then I hung up. I didn’t imagine it; just from the tone of voice, I could tell the other person was upset. It wasn’t long before a small figure in white clothes walked into the café and sat down opposite me. The expression on Aunt Prae’s face now clearly indicated she was not doing well.

“Uh…so,” I wanted to ask, but didn’t know what to say. Aunt Prae looked very unwell, pale with swollen eyes as if she had just been crying heavily, “Aunt Prae…how are you doing, are you okay?”    “…” Aunt Prae gently shook her head instead of answering, smiled, and waved to the waiter indicating she wasn’t ready to order anything,

“I’m sorry for coming so suddenly.”

“It’s fine, what’s going on?”

“Well…um,” she bit her lip hard and started to sob. She tried to hold back her tears. I quickly handed her a tissue, looking at her with concern and worry, “It’s just…uh, I’ve been a bit stressed during the

New Year.”

“Is…something wrong? You can tell me.”

“Phii Rati…uh.”

“Father?”

“Uh, he still won’t stop harassing me and the child. During this New Year, he’s been contacting me constantly, asking where we are, saying he wants to take the child back. When I refused to answer, he threatened to come find us.”

“…” I furrowed my brows, looking at the small figure trying to hold back tears until her shoulders shook. She looked so exhausted, which made me feel bad too, “He…won’t agree to the divorce, right?”    “Yes, sniff…because I asked for a peaceful divorce, and he wouldn’t agree. If we’re going to divorce, it has to go to court,” Aunt Prae said with a trembling voice, trying to wipe her tears with a heartwrenching look. “Of course, the one to get custody of the child will definitely be him.”

“Why is that?”

“Probably because he’s more able to provide care.”

“Ah…” I nodded to show I understood, because at this point, my father is very stable financially; not only does he hold a high position, but he’s also about to have his own company.

I took the liberty to gently squeeze her small hand as a gesture of comfort.

I can’t help with anything…

“I…I don’t want Fai to live with him, sniff, sob,” she let the tears fall uncontrollably, as if she was exhausted and could no longer bear it.

“He threatened me…he’s scary, really scary.”

“What…what did he say?”

“He said, ‘Do you think I can’t find you? Do you think you can hide the child from me forever? It won’t be hard at all for him to bring both you and the child back to him’…sniff, why, why doesn’t he go find someone else, why does he have to keep coming after us?”

“…”

“…”

Why is my father so cruel to Aunt Prae like this?

   I could only think that over and over while trying to comfort her. When they were together, my father never respected Aunt Prae’s feelings, cheating on her, and now when Aunt Prae wants to separate to start anew with her child, he still won’t let her go.

   What does that man want…

   How long will he continue to ruin other people’s lives?

   “…Are you feeling better?” I asked with concern, seeing that she had started to stop crying. Aunt Prae forced a smile.

“Mm, sorry, I must have been really exhausted,” she sighed deeply.

“Sorry for making you feel bad too.”

“It’s okay,” I shook my head slightly.

“I just wanted someone to listen to me, but no one understands me. My relatives keep telling me to go back to Phii Rati, and no one understands how much he has hurt me.”

“I’ll listen to you, Aunt Prae.”

“…Thank you, why are you such a good kid?” Aunt Prae said with a smile, reaching up to gently stroke my head, “Are you doing well?”

“Yes, I’m doing well, and how about Fai?”

“She’s very stubborn,” Aunt Prae said with a smile, her eyes showing signs of exhaustion, “It’s really tiring being a single mom, much harder than I thought.”

“Aunt Praeyou can do it, and so can Fai. She’ll grow up to be a very strong child.”

“If I were as kind as you, that would be great. I wish Fai could be like you.”

“…Thank you,” I said, smiling shyly, and then we talked about various things, catching up since we hadn’t seen each other for a while. Although we chat on LINE sometimes, it’s not that often. I learned that Aunt Prae has moved back here; originally from Chiang Mai, she’s now living with family, where her grandmother helps look after Fai when Aunt Prae goes to work. She even invited me to visit when I have time.

Aunt Prae also asked about my studies. I told her the truth, including about my part-time job as a photographer.

“And…with Phii Rati, how is it going?” Aunt Prae asked with a troubled expression.

“Uh…I haven’t talked to my father in a long time, but I keep in touch with Uncle-Kong. He’s the one who sends money.”    “Oh…do you think…could you talk to Phii Rati about me?”

“…”

“I’m just asking, but if you can’t, that’s fine. I just want to try different approaches to see if there’s anything that can help.”    “I doubt it would work,” I said honestly. Of course, if I could help, I would want to, “If I talk about this, it would just make him angrier, especially if he finds out I’ve been talking to you Aunt Prae. I…am not important enough for him to listen.”

“Sorry, I’m really sorry for bringing it up like that.”

“It’s okay,” I said, “But…we should try to do something because it seems he’s serious about this.”

“…”

“He’s angry and will act on it. He’ll definitely take Fai,” I said, furrowing my brows with a serious expression. I know how scary my father can be when he’s angry, and now that he has everything in his hands, my words made Aunt Prae look even paler.    “What should we do…does Fai have to live with him?”

“I don’t want that, but I don’t know what to do,” I said, biting my lip tightly, trying to think but coming up with nothing, and at times like this, I thought of Phii Fah.

Maybe I should consult Phii Fah…would that be okay?

But…

If I tell Phii Fah, I’d have to reveal the truth that I am just an illegitimate child, and I’ve promised myself I wouldn’t say anything to protect my father. But if I do nothing, my only sister, a child who knows nothing about this, would have to live with that man, potentially experiencing the same things I did. Should a child go through that?

“…I’ll try to do something.”

“…Oh, what?”

“I’ll try…but I’m not sure if it will be okay.”

“Sniff, Phoon, thank you, I really appreciate it,” Aunt Prae quickly wiped her tears, then gave me a faint smile, exhaling with exhaustion. “Actually, just listening to me is more than enough. You don’t have to go through any trouble.”

“It’s okay,” I said, “Fai is my sister…”

Aunt Prae thanked me countless times, even though she didn’t know if I could help her at all. But in the midst of the darkness, just knowing there might be a light was the best thing. I’ve always thought Aunt Prae was a very strong woman, and I still stand by that. No matter how tough things get, she will go home to hug her child.    We talked for a while longer and said goodbye. I walked her to her car and came back to sit where I was before. Now, my mind was full of thoughts about Aunt Prae and my father; studying further seemed impossible. I didn’t want to rationalize why my father would do such things, considering he’s been like this for so long. Aunt Prae has to work to raise her child alone, without the support she once had, and after all that exhaustion and despair, she has to deal with this too.    I rubbed my face gently, feeling tense, while reconsidering everything, when suddenly my wrist was grabbed forcefully, startling me.

!!!

Dad!?

I looked at the newcomer, not understanding.

“Why are you here?!”

“Ouch!!” I cried out in shock when I was yanked so hard that my body flew with the force. The people in the café turned to look at us before my father dragged me outside. I tried to resist, but I couldn’t match his strength, “Dad!…it hurts, it hurts!”

   Dad dragged me out of the café, stopping at a secluded alley next to it where no one was around. When he let go of my arm, my right wrist was red from his grip, and seeing his face full of anger made my heart sink.

   No matter when,

   When Dad is angry…it’s always terrifying for me.

   From when I was a child…until now.

   “…” My whole body trembled with fear before his thick hand swung down hard, slapping my face and sending me to the ground.

Smack!

“Ouch!” I screamed from the pain and the numbness spreading across my cheek, tears welling up in my eyes from the pain, then I smelled the scent of blood.

Blood from my nose…

I wiped my nosebleed quickly and tried to stand up.

“Why…why did you do that?!” I shouted back angrily.

“How do you know Prae! Ha, what did you tell her to make her not come back to me? You’ve really ruined my life, ever since you were born you’ve caused me nothing but trouble. I shouldn’t have let you be born in the first place!!” His words were full of rage, which made me both angry and heartbroken, my heart aching intensely.

Shouldn’t have let me be born, huh…

In the end, I cried because of those words.

“Then don’t have me born at all!! If you never loved or cared for me, why have I been born at all!!” I shouted back through my tears with a sobbing voice, feeling numb all over my body, as if I was about to collapse right there.

“Yeah. I wish you hadn’t been born! You’ve ruined everything for me!. I should never have gotten involved with your mother in the first place!” Dad’s voice shouted back, startling me. I bit my lip to stifle my sobs, the pain in my cheek and the trickling blood not stopping, which made me even more afraid of the man standing in front of me, “I never thought you’d ruin my life until the very end, with Prae and Fai, my daughter, you’ve done it too!! If I hadn’t followed Prae secretly, I would never have known, right?”

“Aunt Prae doesn’t want to deal with someone like you anymore; she wants to raise Fai by herself because you’re terrible, do you hear me!! Sniff…You’re such a pathetic man that she doesn’t want you touching her child…” I quickly raised my hands to protect myself when I saw the man in front of me raise his hand again, clenching my teeth in preparation for the punch that was coming.

“Oof!!” The sound of a heavy punch landed on the face, but not mine. I slowly lowered my hands and opened my eyes to look.

North!!

   Why is North taking the punch for me!

   I saw North turn his face away, probably because the punch was strong enough to make him stumble backward and he used one leg to brace himself. My father looked at us with slight confusion but before he could react, North retaliated with a punch of his own.    “North!” I called out in shock when I saw my father stumble back from North’s punch. North didn’t heed my call at all, jumping at my father and landing another punch, the sound of it startlingly loud.

North was very angry…

   I had never seen North this angry before.

   “North, stop, stop for now,” I tried to lock his arm but was easily shrugged off. Why is he so strong!

   “Why are you stopping me! this bastard was going to hit you!” Eh…bastard…?

“That’s enough!” I shouted loudly when I saw my father wiping blood from the corner of his mouth, ready to attack North again. I quickly positioned myself between them, spreading my arms wide. “Aren’t you ashamed of attacking a kid who can’t fight back like this?”    “Can’t fight back?” The man behind me, whom I was shielding, spoke up, seemingly displeased with what I said.

“Have you fallen so low that you have to fight with a kid?”

“…” My father clenched his teeth in anger before lowering his hand.    “Go back. Otherwise, I’ll scream for help, let everyone around here see what it’s like when an adult fights with a child,” I said breathlessly because my heart was racing. It seemed my father was still not satisfied, but he had to leave reluctantly.

“This isn’t over, you brat,” he pointed and cursed before turning to leave.

“Did you call my friend a brat?!” North started shouting, attempting to rush at my father again until I had to hold him back, “Get back here, you bastard! Can’t fight so you run away, you piece of shit!!”    “North, North, calm down,” I tried my hardest to hold North back, but I couldn’t overpower him.

“You tell me to calm down?! Phoon, you, you bastard, who is that guy, and what the hell is he going to do to you, what’s going on, and now you’re crying, what happened, what did he do?” North spoke so fast I could barely keep up, indicating he was just as agitated, though I was glad he cared about me so much.

“That’s my dad.”

“…Huh?”

“The guy who just punched me is my dad.”

“What!!!” North shouted loudly, his face showing utmost shock, “Your dad? Huh? That bastard from earlier, I mean, that uncle from earlier is your dad?”

“Yeah,” I nodded slightly, and North’s expression turned blank, as if his previous anger had dissipated.    “Oh shit. I’m so sorry. I didn’t know…”

“It’s too late now, he’s gone.”

“I thought you were being attacked by someone, when I came to the café and didn’t see you, only your stuff, I thought something serious had happened, damn it,” North ran his hand over his face hard, letting out a big sigh, “Phoon, why didn’t you say something before?”    “Would you have listened? You were just trying to punch him.”    “Damn it, I also cursed at him, Phoon, I hit your dad. I didn’t hold back at all,” North said, wailing pitifully, “I hit him with full force, a direct punch from the shoulder.”

“I saw, his lip was busted.”

“Phoon, I’m sorry, don’t be mad at me, oh my god, what do I do, what do I do, I’ve never punched a friend’s dad in my life, what do I do, shit, do I need to go kneel or bring a garland to apologize or what, what do I do, do do do?” It seemed like North had lost his composure, completely flustered.

“Calm down, North, you were just defending me.”

“Yeah, if you had taken that punch instead, it would have been a disaster.”

“Was it that hard?” I furrowed my brows, asking about the punch my dad gave North.

“Wow, you didn’t hold back at all, this is your kid, man! A light smack would do, not trying to kill him like that,” North said seriously. I let out a slight sigh, knowing that when he’s angry, he never restrains himself.

“And you…are you okay?” I asked with concern.

“I’m fine, but, yeah, my lip is split,” North said, touching the corner of his mouth where a bit of blood was seeping out. “Damn it, you too, your nose won’t stop bleeding.”    “Really?” I wiped my nose again.

“Damn, what should I tell Phii Jo? Can we say we fell?”

“Probably not,” I answered, shaking my head slightly, when I heard a familiar voice calling from a distance.

“North!! Phoon!!”

“Ter?” I turned towards the voice to see Ter running towards us with a panicked expression, immediately hugging us.

“Why are you guys bleeding? What happened? Phoon, why is your nose bleeding? North, why is your lip split? What’s going on?” Both North and I just hugged and comforted Ter, who was overly worried. And soon enough, the older guys, Phii Fah, Phii Hill, and Phii Jo, came running after.

Phii Fah’s face showed immediate shock when he saw my condition.

“Phoon!”

“Phii Fah.” Ter let go of me when he heard Phii Fah call my name, and I quickly ran into Phii Fah’s arms, letting myself cry without shame.

“Sniff…sob, Phii Fah,” I cried into him, and Phii Fah held me tightly. As soon as he embraced me, I felt a safety I’d never felt before. I cried because I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I was scared, really scared when my father was angry, as if it was a fear embedded in me since childhood, so afraid that I couldn’t stop shaking.    “It’s okay. It’s okay now,” he whispered softly, stroking my head in comfort. Just those words of comfort, strangely, calmed me down quickly. It took a while for me to regain my composure, then I looked up at him, and he gave me a gentle smile. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left you alone.”

“…No, it’s not your fault,” I said. Who could have expected something like this would happen…

Slowly, he released me from the hug. I just noticed that there were stains of my blood on Phii Fah’s shirt. Phii Fah gently touched my wound, and when he saw that the bleeding had stopped, he withdrew his hand, looking at me with utmost concern. I then turned to look around at the situation.

   “Okay yet?” Phii Hill asked in a calm voice, but he wasn’t asking me; he was asking Phii Fah instead.

“Uh…” Phii Fah glanced at Phii Jo, who was looking at him with a scary look I’d never seen before, which made my hair stand on end. North also turned pale. I don’t know what happened while I was crying, but it definitely wasn’t good. It felt like the temperature around us dropped several degrees, the atmosphere was so tense I could barely handle it, why did it feel so oppressive?

   Scary…

   “Let’s talk,” Phii Jo said in a low, pressing voice, and Phii Fah nodded slightly.

“I’ll be right there, Phii Fah,” Phii Fah turned to me with the same gentle voice, stroking my head lightly, “Hill, take him back to the café to wait.”

“Uh.”

Before Phii Fah and Phii Jo went somewhere else to talk, Phii Hill led us back into the café.

   “North,” I called out to North, who was sitting beside me, with a mix of courage and fear. He looked so downcast his ears drooped,

“What happened?”

“Phii Jo is angry…really, really angry, and I’m scared, I’m shaking,” North said in a soft voice, showing me his trembling hands, “Phii Hill, will anything happen?”

“What do you mean?” Phii Hill asked back.

“About what just happened, why hasn’t anyone asked what’s going on?” North said.

Oh…right, why hasn’t anyone asked what happened?

   “We already know,” Phii Hill replied.

“Know…about…?” I deliberately left the last word out, feeling my heart beat faster. I didn’t know why.

“Phoon’s father, right?” Phii Hill said, and as soon as he spoke those words, my heart sank. Did Phii Fah already know…? “Jo is really mad that he hurt North, but let’s wait for him to talk with Fah first.”    “Will…everything be okay?” I asked worriedly, afraid that Phii Jo might do something to my father in anger. But what Phii Hill said earlier about waiting for them to talk…does that mean Phii Fah will stop Phii Jo?

“It would get even worse.”

“Because I’ve never seen Fah this angry before.”

…

Tonfah

   “Fah, you know what, I could have him killed right now.”

“Jo, can you calm down a bit?”

“Why should I calm down?”

“Calm down for my sake,” I said, trying to keep my voice as normal as possible, even though I was so angry inside that I could barely control myself. Seeing Phoon’s injuries, I admit I’ve never been this angry before. My tolerance for everything was shattered. When Jo saw my expression, he went silent, realizing I was just as furious as he was.

“At first, I was going to let you do it, but now it’s not going to happen,” Jo said, trying to calm himself down. He did calm down somewhat because if not, that man wouldn’t have driven off so peacefully.

“Understood,” I said.

“When will we deal with it?”

“Tomorrow.”

I took out my phone, looked through my contacts, and immediately made a call. It wasn’t long before the call was answered.

(Hello, how may I assist you?)

   “I heard that Khun Rati is in Chiang Mai. Can you arrange for him to meet me at the office tomorrow at 1 p.m.?”    (Sure, should I inform him of the reason?)

   “Just tell him it’s urgent.”

(Alright.)

   …

A man sat in a luxurious car driving at high speed, pressing the accelerator to vent his seething anger.

Nothing goes as planned!!

And then that damn kid shows up again!!

He was furious when he secretly followed Prae to the café and saw her talking to Typhoon. Without having to say it, he knew that kid must have persuaded Prae to stop dealing with him. Why? Because that kid only causes trouble for him! And his friend too, daring to attack him, him who is about to become the company chairman!? That kid doesn’t know his place, so it’s time someone taught him a lesson!    No, teach them both a lesson, so they’ll learn what they should or shouldn’t do! So they’ll know who they shouldn’t mess with!    Suddenly, his phone rang. He didn’t want to answer right now, but seeing that it was his chairman’s secretary calling, he had to control his irritation and speak politely into the phone.    “Yes, Ms. Krawan, what can I do for you?”

(Khun Rati, are you available tomorrow?)

   “Uh. No, I’m not. I have business in Chiang Mai.”    (Someone wants to meet you at the Chiang Mai branch, tomorrow at 1:00 PM sharp. Please hurry, don’t be late, as they emphasized it’s urgent.)

   “I don’t think I’ll be free, sorry.”

(You must go, this is an order, you have no right to refuse.)

   “Is it a client?”

(No.)

   “Then who is it?”

(The new company chairman.)

SOUTHBESIDETHESKY CHAPTERS HOME  

   SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 30: Lost in Japan

   Tonfah

   Light streamed in amidst the cold atmosphere; within the thick blanket, I was holding the small figure. A sweet scent tickled my nose, making me unconsciously nuzzle the smooth skin several times. The person in my arms breathed in and out in a steady rhythm, indicating they were sleeping soundly. Their small arms held me tightly, unwilling to let go since last night.

I glanced at the sweet face with closed eyes. It wasn’t the first time I’d sneak a look at Phoon when he was asleep, but I never felt bored doing so.

I adjusted the collar of the shirt slightly as he moved, revealing clear red marks contrasting with his smooth, white skin, evidence of what happened last night.

I let out a soft sigh, recalling what I had done. Initially, I had promised myself that our first time would be gentle and I would be as tender to him as possible, but it seemed that wasn’t the case at all.

I hadn’t restrained myself even a bit.

With the words declaring that Phoon belonged to Phii Fah from the very beginning.

I’m not saying it’s because of what he said, Phoon is the type of person who speaks from the heart, everything he says is truly what he feels, and I know…how important I am to Phoon. He shows it clearly in every action and word, and when I’m with Phoon, I feel like I’m the most special person in the world, unlike anything I’ve ever felt before.    It’s not common to find someone who makes you feel like you’re the luckiest man in the world like this.

   I brushed away the hair covering his face, giving a gentle kiss on his smooth cheek, unintentionally smiling.

   I want him to know that he’s the most special person in my world too.

   Last night, I might have been a bit too rough, because sometimes I couldn’t control myself, but I tried my best to be as gentle as possible. Partly because I was concerned about his physical condition; the first time I saw his slender body without clothes, I felt like it needed to be handled with care. I wanted to hold him gently, afraid that even a slight touch might hurt him, but another part of me wanted to devour him completely.

To make Typhoon mine alone.

Ah…I’ve promised myself that Phoon wouldn’t know what I’m thinking.

Last night, after we did it twice, I had to calm down while looking at the small, unconscious body in front of me. His body was covered in red bruises from shoulders to chest to back, making me feel bad thinking about how much he might hurt, but another part of me thought they were insanely sexy and alluring.

I never thought I would understand those feelings, whether it’s Jo or Hill. I now understand how hard it is to control oneself, and when you’re in front of someone you love, all that restraint just crumbles away as if it was never there.

Even though Phoon had passed out last night,

I still…

Ah…damn, how did it end up like this?

After I managed to control myself, I took Phoon to soak in the onsen because the hot water would help relax his body, so when he wakes up this morning, he wouldn’t be too sore. But I don’t know how effective it’ll be; if he can’t even get up, I’d feel really guilty.

“Umm,” the person in my arms slowly opened his eyes, looking dazed.

“You’re awake?”

“Oh, Phii Fah.”

“Yes?”

“Why are you up so early?”

“It’s I who slept in.”

“Oh, really?” Phoon lifted his hand to gently rub his eyes. I stopped his hand, indicating not to rub his eyes.

“Are you okay?”

“Okay? What do you mean?”

“Well…last night.”

“…” Initially, Phoon seemed half-asleep but then his eyes widened in surprise before his face started to flush red, and he buried his face into my chest to hide his embarrassment, “Oh. I don’t know.”    No doubt he would be blushing all over when he woke up.

“If it hurts, I apologize.”

“Oh…forget it. Don’t mention it.”

“How can I not mention it when I was the one who did it?” I said, teasing a bit but genuinely more concerned, “And does it hurt?”    Phoon went silent, seemingly trying to gather his thoughts. Because we were lying close, I could feel how hard his heart was beating, almost as if it would burst out of his chest, though not as much as last night, “Well…not hurt.”

“Really not hurt?”

“…” Phoon nodded slightly, still not looking up at me, “Just a little.”

“Hm?”

“Just a little, bearable.”

“Oh…that’s bad.” I let out a small sigh, feeling guilty, then felt a pang of annoyance at the little one for saying it was bearable when it must have hurt, Phoon was just too kind to me, “I’m sorry, next time I will be gentler, I promise,” I whispered. Phoon buried his face even deeper.    “Uh.”

“What does that mean?”

“Um…well, umm,” I gently stroked his head, feeling so fond of him that I was embarrassed and didn’t know what to do, “Phii Fah.”

“Yes?”

“Is it okay?”

“Okay? You mean…”

“Um…last night,” Phoon said softly, then slowly looked up at me,

“Like…is you okay…right?”

“…” I paused, not answering right away, what does he mean by that? Is he worried that I’m not okay? Why would he think that? I should be the one worried, “Why wouldn’t Phii Fah be okay?”

“Um…well, uh, I…have never worried that you might not like it.”

So cute.

Adorably naive.

“Then should I…prove to you that I like it?”

…

Typhoon

   “Yes, yes, you aren’t teasing anymore.” I pouted in his embrace, my hand stopping its playful hits when Phii Fah chuckled and said that.

“Ah,” I remembered something.

“What?”

“You apologize.”

“For what?”

“Well…I accidentally hit you.” I apologized, feeling guilty. When I get embarrassed, I tend to react violently. North once mentioned that but I didn’t think much of it. Who would have thought I’d accidentally hit Phii Fah?

“It’s not the first time.”

“Oh…really, I apologize.”

“It’s okay. It doesn’t hurt at all.”

“…” I felt relieved that I wasn’t scolded, but it seemed like Phii Fah wasn’t mad, after all, I didn’t hit hard, it’s just that I was embarrassed, so embarrassed I didn’t know what to do!

“Can you get up?” Phii Fah slowly loosened his embrace. I secretly missed the warmth that disappeared as I sat up on the mattress. He helped me to sit, and as soon as I moved, pain shot from my hips to my lower back.

“Ugh.” I clenched my teeth to suppress the pain, but it probably wasn’t very convincing. Phii Fah looked at me with concern and guilt in his eyes.

“Does it hurt a lot?”

“Not much, just a little,” I said, remembering that it had hurt more last night. His serious expression and concerned tone made me feel even more embarrassed, trying not to think about last night’s events. Not that I wanted to forget; I wanted to remember everything, but thinking about it now would only make me blush even more, to the point where I couldn’t even look at Phii Fah.

“Is it better than last night?”

“Uh…well,” his serious tone made it hard for me to respond, like being asked about symptoms by a doctor. It was that serious, “Yes…it’s better,” I answered truthfully because I remembered how much it hurt after…well, after we were done last night.

“So, that means soaking in the onsen helped, right?”    “Onsen?” I furrowed my brow, repeating the word.

“Yes, I took you to soak in it.”

“While I was asleep?”

“Yes.”

!!!

I buried my face in the blanket, imagining what that would have been like. If we went to the onsen, we’d have to be completely undressed.

   “So…you put me in the bath?”

“We soaked together.”

“…” I glimpsed his handsome face, adorned with a smile as if it wasn’t strange at all. Why would we soak together? Together in the onsen! I thanked myself for not being conscious at the time; if I had been aware while soaking in the hot spring with Phii Fah like that, I probably would have fainted as soon as I got into the bath.    Phii Fah helped me sit on the mattress, and after a while, a staff member brought breakfast to serve in the main room, but Phii Fah seemed to ask them to serve it in our room instead.

I smiled at the female staff member who also seemed a bit puzzled by her smile, but they looked somewhat embarrassed.

“What did they say?” I asked after seeing Phii Fah talking briefly with the staff before they left, noticing Phii Fah smiling too.

“They said we make a good match.”

“Oh…really?” I smiled again at the meaning behind those words. It’s nice to hear someone say that I match well with Phii Fah, “That’s nice.”

“Yes, it’s nice, isn’t it?” He reached out to gently stroke my head again before we sat down to have breakfast together. After eating, I immediately got excited knowing that we were about to go out sightseeing. I assured Phii Fah that I was no longer in pain, although in reality, it still hurt, but as I said, it was bearable, and it seemed to be getting better gradually.    “You’re sure you’re okay?”

“I’m really okay, I am actually very strong.”

“…” Phii Fah furrowed his brows looking at me, gave me a slight smile, then gently stroked my head. I met his eyes, which were filled with guilt, making me feel uncomfortable.

“Phii Fah.”

“Yes?”

“I am really okay…really,” I said with conviction.

“Alright, you brave boy.” Phii Fah said softly, then gently pulled me closer for a hug. When his strong arms embraced me, I nestled into the warmth, the faint scent wafting to my nose, “If it hurts, tell me, okay?”    “Understood.”

“Yes, good boy.” Phii Fah playfully pinched my cheek, I really like how Phii Fah calls me that. Whether it’s ‘good boy’ or ‘brave boy’, or anything like that, it feels very heartwarming, before his thick lips touch mine in a gentle kiss, holding the contact for a moment before pulling away. I looked at him with my face slightly flushed, before Phii Fah released his embrace, and we prepared to head outside.    Because the weather was quite cold, I wore several layers of warm clothing and even had heat packs inside my jacket. Looking at Phii Fah in his dark winter coat, it felt like we were on a photo shoot trip. Besides sightseeing, I also planned to take lots of photos of Phii Fah, feeling like a photographer and model combined.    “Today, I will take lots of photos of you, Phii Fah.”    “Yes,” Phii Fah smiled, even though he had once said he didn’t really like taking photos, lately it seemed he had gotten used to it. He even mentioned that if Phoon liked it, then Phii Fah was okay with it, which made me realize how genuinely kind Phii Fah was.    I hardly felt any pain around my hips anymore, only when bending down, but if I walked normally, I was fine. We walked through the hotel lobby and out into the open.

   The first place we wanted to visit was a temple that served as a landmark here, taking the train as usual. I took photos of both the scenery and my model who came with me.    “Aren’t you going to be in the photos too?”

“Oh, I don’t like taking pictures of myself.”

“I know, but we’re on a trip after all.”

“True, it would be a shame not to have any photos,” I said, contemplating how to do it, perhaps just a selfie would do.

“I’ll take some for you then.”

“Phii Fahyou will take photos of me?”

“Is that okay? Even if Phii Fah doesn’t take as good pictures as

Phoon.”

“Of course!” I said, beaming with joy, quickly handing over the camera to him, “I am not that great at being a model like you either,” I thought aloud. Even though I didn’t intend to be the model, as a photographer, I can confidently say that Phii Fah looks good from every angle, whether he’s posing for the camera or caught off-guard.    “It feels like this is the first time I’ve taken a photo of you, Phoon.”    “It is,” I smiled broadly, stepping back to include the background in the frame. From where Phii Fah was standing, if he took the shot from here, the lighting and background would be perfect.

“Seems like the model is setting up the shot himself, huh?” Phii Fah remarked. I chuckled at his comment.

“Is it okay?”

“Yes, it’s fine,” Phii Fah said, lifting the camera. I smiled awkwardly at the lens, not used to being photographed, since I was always the one taking photos.

“How did it turn out?” I half-ran over, excited to see the photo, and when I checked the camera, it wasn’t bad at all, “Do you take photos often?”

“Let’s just say I hardly ever touch a camera.”

“Wow, then you’re really good,” I complimented. I wasn’t just saying it, I meant it, “And that was your first time taking a Polaroid for me, right?”

“Yes.”

“First time and you took such a beautiful Polaroid.”

“You’re really good at giving compliments,” Phii Fah playfully pinched my cheek, his warm hand contrasting with the surrounding temperature. I pouted slightly before he let go. While we were taking a break, I transferred the photos from the camera to my phone, wanting to post a picture of myself that Phii Fah had just taken on my Instagram.

It was a picture of me smiling broadly at the camera.

With the composition I had set up myself, you could see a bit of the background view and the sky above.

I posted it on my IG with the caption, ‘Photo by You ❤ ‘

   My Instagram used to only have pictures of the sky, all in shades of blue, but after being with Phii Fah, my IG started to have more colors because I only posted when we were together.

“Should I send the photo to you too?”

“Sure, which photo?”

“Just the one at the temple is fine.”

“Okay.” I agreed, before sending the photo. Phii Fah took the one I had captured of him, from the same angle as mine, the background was the same, the only difference was the person in the photo. Phii Fah posted it on his IG and tagged me, using the same caption.    It looked so cute. We didn’t need to post a couple-photo to show that we were together.

After that, we toured various places in Tokyo as much as we could, enjoying the beautiful winter scenery of Japan, taking lots of pictures, stopping for delicious food, and buying some interesting items until evening when we went for a walk in the park.

“It’s so peaceful,” I said to myself while looking at the atmosphere after the sun had set. There were some people walking around, but it wasn’t noisy or chaotic. Walking along the path, one side was lined with trees, the other reflected the orange glow from the city lights on the river.

I gripped his warm right hand tighter as it got colder after sunset.

“Thank you,” I said.

“Eh?”

“The one who brought us here.”

“It’s okay,” Phii Fah replied, “It’s good to travel together.”    “Indeed,” I smiled in agreement, “There aren’t many people around here, maybe because it’s getting late or something; they’ve all started to go back home, perhaps because of the cold weather. Once the sun sets, people hurry back.”    “Did you have fun today?”

“It was a lot of fun. How about you, Phii Fah?”

“I enjoyed it too.”

Before we decided it was time to head back, we grabbed a quick dinner and returned to the same hotel. It seems we’ll need to check out tomorrow because we’re moving to another city.

   If we’re checking out tomorrow, I should soak in the onsen tonight.

Otherwise, I’ll miss the chance.

   “I…I’m going to soak in the hot spring.”

“Okay.”

“And…you Phii Fah?”

“Hm?”

“Are you going to soak?”

“I’ll wait for another time, Phoon.”

“Oh, okay,” I agreed. When I told Phii Fah I was going to soak in the onsen and went to grab a yukata, he immediately left the bedroom, probably because he saw I was about to change.

Once I had changed into the yukata, I stepped out of the bedroom to find Phii Fah on the phone. After a while, he hung up. When he saw me, he looked a bit surprised.

“What’s up?”

“Mom called to ask how the trip was going.”

“Oh.”

“Uh…Phoon.”

“Sure?”

“Please wear your clothes properly.”

“…” I looked down at myself in confusion; I thought I was dressed properly, though I didn’t fully understand. However, I adjusted my collar to make sure it was neat, “Is this okay?”

“No.”

“…”

“This outfit isn’t okay at all,” Phii Fah said, sticking out his tongue to press against his cheek, then he seemed to ponder for a moment, “Sigh,” he sighed, looking away.

I furrowed my brows at him, what did he mean by that? I was already dressed properly.

   “Hurry up and soak,” Phii Fah said without looking at me. I agreed and left the room to go to the onsen, stopping in front of the bath with a slight feeling of confusion, wondering if I needed to wash up first.    I took off my yukata and washed myself properly, then slowly lowered myself into the hot spring. The moment the hot water touched my skin, it immediately made me feel relaxed.

   While soaking, my thoughts wandered, including thoughts about Phii Fah. It was nice to travel together; it felt like we were making good memories.

   Ah, why does the memory from last night keep popping into my head!

   Last night, we soaked together too.

   After that thing we did…for the first time, it really was my first time, and I gave it to someone I love. What Phii Fah said about being rough didn’t bother me at all, and even though the somewhat lewd thoughts that crept into my mind were quite embarrassing, I couldn’t deny that it felt good…every touch felt good.

   I shook my head to clear those thoughts; we’re lovers…this kind of thing isn’t strange, right? Before my mind could wander to other things while I was enjoying the soak, suddenly darkness enveloped everything.

   Huh…the lights went out!

   Dark…completely dark.

   “Phii…Phii Fah!” As soon as the light in the hot spring room went out, my heart started beating faster. Looking around, I couldn’t see anything; it was just darkness. I began to shout for the first person I thought of.

“No…please, it’s dark.”

“Phii Fah…Phii Fah…, help me!” My whole body tensed up, and tears began to slowly trickle down. Just a few seconds after the lights went out, I heard someone’s footsteps rushing towards me.

“Phoon!”

“Phii Fah…help me, Phii Fah.”

“It’s okay now,” Phii Fah pulled me out of the hot spring and hugged me tightly, even though I was wet. He didn’t care about his own state.

I just kept crying and clung to him tightly.

“Sniff…” I bit my lip to stop myself from crying harder; Phii Fah hugged me, gently stroking my head to comfort me, wrapping me in a towel to keep me from getting too cold.

“It’s okay. It’s okay, I am here now.”

“Uh-huh…” I held him tightly and buried my face into him. It took some time for me to calm down, but my body was still trembling because the surroundings were still dark.

Phii Fah carried me for about four to five steps, setting me down on a wooden shelf before reaching out to flip the switch nearby, and the lights in the room came back on.

   “Wh-why?”

“It must have just been the light switch tripping.”

“Oh…I see, that’s terrible, why did it have to trip?”

“Are you okay?” Phii Fah asked with concern in his voice. Realizing my own condition, I felt embarrassed and clutched the towel tightly around me.

“Uh…yeah, I’m fine now, thanks for helping me.”

“Well…but I think this place isn’t really okay anymore.”

“…”

Before his sharp gaze swept over my naked body. I was about to cover myself, but he grabbed my hands first.

I slowly looked up at him, and he moved closer, pressing his lips against mine fiercely. It was a heavy, intense kiss that indicated he was losing patience. His rough hands roamed over my wet body.    Breathing heavily, Phii Fah quickly removed his shirt, revealing his smooth, white skin and broad chest that always made my heart skip a beat no matter how many times I looked at it. Our kisses grew more passionate, our tongues intertwining, creating embarrassing sounds, along with our synchronized breaths. Phii Fah kissed me so intensely that I could hardly breathe.

“Ugh,” I let out a soft moan when one of his hands roamed across my chest while the other unbuckled his belt.

I don’t know what came over me, but I reached out with both hands to gently touch his belt, helping to unbuckle it. My body ached with desire, indicating that I was just as turned on as he was. When his belt and pants were off, Phii Fah lifted me up without breaking our kiss, and I kissed him back while holding him tight.

Phii Fah slowly led me back into the onsen, but this time, we were both soaking together, though it wasn’t an ordinary soak. I was now straddling him.

I looked at him through misty eyes, the steam rising from the water, our bodies heating up several degrees because of the onsen’s temperature. I wrapped my arms around his neck, his hot tongue exploring my mouth, as if wanting to claim everything.

“Ugh,” I breathed heavily, my chest heaving, my heart beating so fast it was almost arrhythmic, my legs tensing up when I felt my sensitive spot touch his erect member, indicating he was just as aroused.

“Phoon,” Phii Fah pulled away from the kiss. I licked my lips, which felt numb, still feeling like I was being kissed by him.

“Stop me right now,” Phii Fah whispered in a husky, slightly hoarse voice. His face now looked so sexy that I felt like I could melt into the hot water. I saw his broad shoulders peeking out of the water, his hair slightly wet. No, it was the steam that made his hair damp like that.    “Wh…why?”

“If you don’t, I might not be able to be gentle.”

“It…it’s okay,” I said with a throaty voice, looking into those deep black eyes with adoration, “I am…okay.”

“You should be careful with what you say…darling”

“Uh, uh,” I murmured before Phii Fah stretched up, biting my nipple hard, his hands beginning to explore my body mischievously. One hand massaged my hips, making me arch into the touch, while the other kneaded the inside of my thigh.

“Uhmm…” I arched my back as the thick lips caressed my chest, allowing him to bite and suck as he wished, leaving red marks over the old ones from last night.

“Ah, Phoon, can you do something for me?”

“Mmm.”

“Please,” that request. I thought for a moment about what it meant before I understood. I surrendered…surrendered to everything, releasing one hand that was holding onto his broad shoulder to ease the tingling from the sensitive spot on my chest, slowly moving my hand under the hot water, lightly touching his stiff member.    And I was shocked by its size…probably because it was my first time touching it.

It was terrifyingly hard…I slowly used my thumb to press on the tip.

Before I could feel anything, thick fingers gripped my core as well. “Ah!” I gasped in surprise as slender fingers suddenly traced from the base to the tip, circling there. I started to feel a hollowness in my stomach, the tingling sensation spreading throughout my body from the sensitive spot.

Phii Fah sucked in a breath lightly as I began to stroke him, the water making me move slowly, even though I was already mortified, yet I couldn’t stop.

“Uhm…”

I bit my lip tightly as he started to grip my painfully hard core, moving up and down rhythmically, and without warning, one slender finger pushed into me from behind.

“Ahhh, uh, it hurts!”

“Oh…just bear with it, good boy,” he whispered in a deep voice beside my ear.

As soon as the finger rubbed against the back passage, I felt a sharp pain, before Phii Fah slowly moved in and out. My hand continued its slow movement, starting to pick up the pace as he did the same.    “Mm,” Phii Fah groaned softly in his throat, which intensified my arousal several times over. My mind had been lost since the moment we kissed, then the pressure from behind became stronger, rocking my body with it. I leaned against Phii Fah’s chest when the force from behind was too strong to keep my balance, both my hands now clutching his shoulders tightly to cope with the sensations from both front and back.

“Ahh! Ah! Ugh!” I moaned incoherently when he inserted another finger, and the speed of his movements didn’t slow down, as I was being stimulated from both the front and the back, bringing me close to climax. It seemed he knew, because Phii Fah let go of my member.    “Ah!” I cried out when his slender fingers were suddenly withdrawn from my body, and without any warning, Phii Fah lifted my hips up, then pushed them down, allowing his large member to enter me from behind.

“Ugh,” I bit my lip tightly, the water making the sensation slightly more resistant, highlighting the friction. I could feel Phii Fah entering me slowly. When I sat down, his length went all the way in, and its size and length made me feel extremely uncomfortable.

“Do you want to try moving yourself?” Phii Fah whispered hoarsely, breathing rapidly, his chest heaving from his heart beating too fast. It felt so good when he entered me like this, and because of his whisper, I slowly started to move my hips.

As soon as I moved, Phii Fah bit his lip, moaning again in his throat, his face full of passion making him look even more intense. And when the pleasure spread, I couldn’t help but move up and down faster.

“Mmm, Ahhh, Ah, Ah! Ahh!” When my mind went blank, I focused on the spots that felt good, pressing down on them repeatedly, while Phii Fah used both hands to support my hips, moving them faster as he desired, with the mix of pain and pleasure spreading all over. “Ahhh!” I cried out in a lost voice when he thrust up to meet my rhythm, making me feel a tightness all over my stomach. Water from the hot spring splashed around, but it seemed unimportant.

“Ah! Uhmm, P…Phii Fah, I…I,” I could barely speak as I couldn’t withstand the pleasure, my body twitching slightly before releasing white liquid. As soon as I released, my whole body felt weak, as if all my strength had been drained.

“Oh, are you going to come?”

“…Mmm.” Even though he asked that, Phii Fah didn’t stop.    “Too bad, you’ve been a bad boy.” With those words, Phii Fah lifted my body to withdraw his core, turning me so my back was to him. I knelt within the bath, my arms resting on the edge, before his large core pushed into me again.

“Oh, ugh, ah! ah ah ah!” I moaned in sync with the thrusts in and out, the movements and impacts were so forceful that my body trembled with each one. Phii Fah’s hand reached under my inner thigh to pull me closer to him, and then he thrust even harder, making it more intense than before.

It was so pleasurable that I almost lost my mind…

“Mm,” I felt the sharp pain in my back, and when I glanced back, I saw Phii Fah making red marks to claim me all over my back, kissing and biting everywhere. I could hear the friction and impact of our bodies.

“Ah…ugh, harder.”

“Hmm?”

“Ph…Phii Fah, ugh, I…needs to, ugh, ah!”

“What was that? Say it again for me to hear,” Phii Fah leaned in to whisper, after slowing down his movements.

“I…need…mm, Phii Fah.”

“Yes?”

Phii Fah turned my body to face him, slowly licking his lower lip, brushing his wet hair back as if it was in the way, before resuming his intense thrusts, going in as deep as possible, pulling out, and thrusting back in with force.

“Ah!!”

I don’t know why I said that,     but it felt good,     so good I felt like I was going crazy.

   And I wanted more, much more.

   “Ahh! Ah! Ah ah ah, ugh!” I moaned until my voice was hoarse, my heart beating too fast to catch my breath, “I…I, I…can’t anymore.”

“Hmm?”

“I’m…going to come.”

“Ah, then let’s do it together,” he said in a deep, husky voice, before his body twitched slightly and he released his warm fluid inside me. I also came for the second time, and my mind almost drifted away. The large member was slowly withdrawn, Phii Fah bent down to kiss me tenderly, before lifting me from the hot spring and taking me to wash up.

My mind was completely blank; I couldn’t think anymore. Phii Fah pressed me against the wall slightly, inserting his fingers into my back passage to scoop out his own cloudy liquid, which made me feel so embarrassed because not only had he finished inside me earlier, but now he was taking it out too.

“Mmm…” I bit my lip, moaning in my throat again as the mischievous fingers didn’t just remove the cloudy liquid but also moved inside. “No…no more.”    “You don’t want me anymore?”

“Uhmm…” His thick lips kissed me again, this time with a gentle, soft kiss that made my heart melt along with the warm water from the shower that was now caressing both our bodies.    “Let me make you feel good, be a good boy.”

“Uhmm, yes,…be gentle this time, please.”

“…”

“Can you do that?”

“Yes, I promise.” Before Phii Fah slowly turned me around, bending me over to pull my hips closer, and gently inserted his core again. This time, the rhythm started slow but focused, pressing deep into my sensitive spot before slowly withdrawing.

Gradually picking up speed, but not as rough as before.

“Mmm, Ahhh…” The focus on that spot sent pleasure all over my body. I arched my hips to meet his rhythm without shame because I couldn’t think of anything else now, the gentleness making me feel like my body and heart had completely melted away.    “Ah!” Before Phii Fah turned me to face him and lifted me up without withdrawing his large core, holding me in this position felt strange, in a completely different way, but it felt incredibly good. I clung to him tightly, but his strong arms around me gave me confidence that I was safe, before Phii Fah thrust into me again, making me cry out in a lost voice.

“Ugh! Ahhh! Ahh, Uhmm…” Because of this position, he entered deeply, giving a different kind of pleasure, fully penetrating and making me feel a painful tightness all over my stomach. My whole body and both legs tensed up, the thrusting becoming gradually more intense.

“Ahh, Ahhh, Ah…”

“Do you like it like this?” Phii Fah whispered softly, nibbling on my ear and the nape of my neck.

“Yes…yes, uhmm…”

“Mmm, why are you gripping me so tightly?”

“Ahh! Ah! Ah ah ah!” I moaned out of breath as he thrust harder, my powerless body trying to hold onto him, Phii Fah hugged me tighter. Now, everything in front of me was blurred, my mind was fading, it seemed like I saw Phii Fah biting his lower lip. This time, it took longer for me to reach climax because I had already released several times, making my body weary.

“Ugh,” reaching climax and releasing for who knows how many times this night, even though I had already finished, the other still showed no sign of finishing. I tried to keep my consciousness, then felt the body in front of me twitch slightly, warm fluid was shot into me once more, and he withdrew his large member. I could feel what must have been white, creamy liquid flowing down my thighs.    Phii Fah gently laid me down, and I felt him bathe and clean me, before drying me off and taking me back to the bedroom.    In the last moment before my consciousness faded, Phii Fah raised his hand to stroke my cheek, kissed my forehead, kissed my cheek, and touched his lips to mine, holding the contact for a moment before pulling away. He gently stroked my hair, these actions made my heart feel incredibly warm.

“I think he’s starting to like this place.”

“Let’s come to visit often, okay?”

“Sweet dreams, my love.”

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