SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 20: Syntax Error #6. 

   The couple who have been together for seven years are no different from a married couple, even if they claim to have no basic sexual desires. Something exciting and deep. Jaehong decided to try it out. 

   “It’s hot, just like before.”

   He lowered his voice and slowly removed his coat. When the white shirt fitted perfectly against his body was revealed, the man turned around immediately. Although he looked back for a moment, he didn’t seem flustered.

   Jaehong smiled wickedly, unbuttoned his shirt cuffs, and rolled up the sleeves to the elbows. He wanted to match his appearance to the evaluation of his partners as sexy. He gradually loosened his necktie and unbuttoned two buttons of his shirt to reveal the well-defined muscles that came from a little exercise.

   Normally, he wouldn’t do anything so slow and deliberate, but he made an exception this time.

   Tint, tint, tint, tint, tint, tint.

   [Desired temperature inside the car: 18 degrees.] 

   Chu Sangwoo adjusted the air conditioning carefully, trying not to disturb Jaehong’s emotions.

   “I’ve set the lowest temperature. The temperature will lower in a moment.”

   “Thank you.”

   The other side is just an ordinary fool, or has high-level defenses.

   Jaehong buttoned up again and pondered heavily, but he couldn’t be sure of anything. He had three to four one-night stands per month and had encountered many different people, but this is the first time he has met a man with such an odd posture. A man who was proud of his status, a narcissistic man, a tall and self-aware man, a married man. A moody man. Among all these difficult cases, this man is nothing like any of them. It could be said that Chu Sangwoo accidentally ended up in a gay club without any intention.

   The situation is not good at all, as the man seems to see Jaehong as a clumsy and not very skilled Korean-speaking foreigner. However, the other party definitely admires Jaehong’s appearance. Whether it’s because he looks similar to Jang Jaeyoung or for some other reason, he has no other hope than to use it to his advantage.

   While Jaehong was quietly contemplating, the car arrived at the aquarium.

   The young man quickly parked the car before grabbing the camera bag from the back seat and putting it over his shoulder. He got out of the car without saying anything. When Jaehong got out of the car, the man briskly walked ahead. When he followed the other party to the ticket booth, a short argument ensued.

   “You’ve been driving, so let me pay for the tickets.”

   “It’s fine. Just keep your pocket money.”

   “No, I…”

   “If you really want to spend that much money, on the 175 th  day from today, you can put the money in an envelope.”

   “…”

   Jaehong couldn’t think of a quick retort and thus lost the argument once again.

   The young man used a 20% resident discount voucher to buy two tickets on his mobile phone before leading the way. When they entered the building, they encountered a hallway with walls and ceilings decorated as an aquarium, which was crowded with noisy children due to the venue’s reputation and it being a weekend.

   Jaehong draped his jacket over his arm and casually glanced at the fish tanks, paying little attention. After walking a few steps, he could feel the other party’s gaze on his neck and side profile. Trying to pretend not to care, he eventually couldn’t bear it and sneaked a look at his own reflection in the glass, while swiftly opening his pants pocket, feigning ignorance of the gaze.

   He encountered men who declined having sex with him with the reason that he already had a wife or had had countless boyfriends. If the attraction was purely physical, it would be useless, just like being in a relationship with someone who has a lover and has been dating for a long time. In this situation, even if the man was close to getting married and could control his emotions strongly, it was reasonable to be fearful.

   However, he couldn’t immediately deceive the other party, as the place was filled with children and it would be difficult to find even the letter “S” in the word “Sex”. Jaehong decided to buy the other party’s favor here for the time being. At that moment, the young man picked up the long-lens camera, as if it had become a heavy weapon, and started taking pictures of the fish coincidentally.

   “Do you like taking photos?”

   “Yes, I do.”

   “It’s a great hobby.”

   “I like it because it makes me feel like I can capture moments that cannot be revisited in two-dimensional form.”

   “I understand. Ultimately, photography is one of the most powerful results of human efforts to conquer time.”

   Although he didn’t do anything wrong when he first heard it, Jaehong quickly became accustomed to the young man’s speaking style and found it easier to imitate than he thought. The other side seemed satisfied with Jaehong’s answer and paused for a moment before responding reservedly but clearly.

   “Yes, that’s right. Because the appearance of each thing is different from one minute ago, ten minutes ago, or one hour ago. When it is captured on a flat surface, it feels like owning that thing during that time. It’s a pity that in the realm of physics it is said that time machines cannot be invented, so we can only rely on this imperfect method without other alternatives.”

   The other side looked at the camera with a pensive and intoxicated look before starting to take pictures of the fish in the tank again. Jaehong secretly admired the side profile of that person.

   “We can’t go back to the past… It’s a simple thought that is similar to philosophy, isn’t it? That’s why we must seize the moment, Carpe diem[2], choosing to capture a moment is always good, right?”

   After making his thoughts clear, he looked at the man without blinking, but the man seemed to not understand and looked confused.

   “Korean is quite difficult for you, isn’t it? I can speak English if you prefer.”  “…”

   The man continued to take photos until the large water tank was in full view, then he stopped and checked the pictures on the camera. When he glanced at the screen, it seemed like they were not exceptionally impressive images. Even Jaehong, who knew nothing, felt that the arrangement of the elements was scattered and looked no different from taking a photo with a mobile phone.

   Jaehong kept his thoughts to himself and praised him sincerely.

   “Hmm, an excellent ability indeed.”

   “I have seven years of experience.”

   “I have been wanting to study all along, can you help teach me a bit?”

   “How to take photos?”

   “Yes.”

   The young man gladly agreed.

   It went according to Jaehong’s plan. If he said he wanted to learn photography, he had to try taking photos and send them to him. Since the moment he received the camera, there have been countless ways to use it as a medium to receive impressions from the other side. However, the young man held onto the camera tightly and refused to send it to Jaehong.

   “First of all, this model is a single-lens reflex camera. The reflected image that enters the lens will be seen through the viewfinder, passing through the color separation process, and the light signals will be converted into electrical signals using a CMOS image sensor instead of film.”

   When Jaehong paused with an interested look, the theory class continued.

   “Look here. Does the lens capture the reflected image?”

   “Yes.”

   “The object being photographed will pass through the RGB filter inside and remain on the image sensor. The part that protrudes here is the pentaprism, which corrects the image to appear upright through a reflection process.

   That’s why it’s called a reflex camera.”

   ‘Finally.’ 

   The person requesting to be taught had no excuses to stop the explanation. If Jaehong knew that the lecture would take up to eleven minutes, he would not have pretended to see the camera from the beginning.

   “I’ll check if you understand correctly. What is the purpose of this part?”

   “It is used to adjust the focus of the object when using manual focus mode 

   [7].” 

   “What is it called?”

   “Focus Ring.”

   “Please explain the difference between contrast AF[8] and phase difference

   AF[9].”

   “Contrast AF has a strength in focus accuracy, while phase difference AF has a strength in speed. Your camera, Chu Sangwoo, uses a hybrid autofocus method that combines both techniques.”

   “Very impressive.”

   ‘Received a compliment, huh.’

   That was the only success of the day. Jaehong felt uncertain whether he should be happy or not, as he went back and forth with the other party, from receiving only cold reactions to interactions that made him feel even the simplest greeting seemed more valuable than ever. He smiled comfortably, responding without feeling anything.

   “Thank you for explaining so well.”

   “Yes, that’s right. You also know a lot.”

   At that moment, the young man smiled softly with eyes that once had no emotions, causing his eyes to disappear into the eyelids. Although it was just a slight movement of the facial muscles, the atmosphere that used to be tense changed completely by 180 degrees. The smile had an angle that resembled that of a small child.

   ‘My boyfriend? He is super cute.’ 

   It seemed like Jang Jaeyoung didn’t make a mistake, but then his calm and distinctive face quickly returned.

   “What I just explained was only the basic knowledge of the structure of certain cameras. Remember that the working principles may vary slightly depending on the model.”

   “Understood.”

   “You have to constantly learn in order to become a skilled photographer. If you want to, I will send you a link to a useful camera course through Hyung

   Jaeyoung.”

   “I understand.”

   Anything is fine, but the conclusion is, ‘through Hyung Jaeyoung’. Is that so? He didn’t like it, it took him eleven minutes out of his two hours to patiently listen to the detailed explanation, and the photographer wasn’t worth it. Even though he felt somewhat familiar with this stranger, well, that’s it.

   Jaehong reached out his hand and softly asked.

   “Now that we have studied the theory, is it time to practice?”

   Sangwoo shielded his arm around the camera as if Jaehong wanted to destroy it, and it seemed like he came up with the idea that they were getting closer.

   “I will show you a good example.”

   The other party carefully tucked the camera into the bag in response to Jaehong’s request. Then he took out his mobile phone from his pants pocket and scrolled through the album for a moment before selecting one picture to show Jaehong.

   One man wrapped a scarf around his head, holding the steering wheel of what appeared to be a car SUV top-down, with a dark, sandy beach background and the edge of the sky slanting gracefully. But the smile on the man’s face made the picture brighter and fresher, and it was only then that Jaehong realized that Jang Jaeyoung was someone who could smile so warmly.

   “After taking this photo, I accidentally dropped the camera. I don’t know why the sandstorm was so strong, and the equipment broke. Plus, I ended up eating a lot of sand. But because I managed to recover this photo, I didn’t mind.”  Suddenly, the man spoke up.

   ‘What should I say in response?’ 

   At times like this, he should speak in support of the other party’s words, but Jaehong instead revealed a puzzled smile. Why did he go to the beach? What did Jang Jaeyoung like to make him smile so widely? Jaehong didn’t really want to know the heartwarming memories of their shared past, so he strained his desire to speak out and changed the conversation topic.

   “Seems like you enjoy traveling.”

   “Yes. Because even the same object can look different depending on the background.”

   “That’s true. Where are you planning to go for your winter vacation?”

   “Canada, near the North Pole.”

   “You’re going to see the aurora, right?”

   “Yes. I’m going snowboarding. I went there four years ago, but at that time, there were weather issues so I couldn’t see the aurora. Hyung Jaeyoung said he wanted to see it, so this time I want to show it to him.”

   The young man spoke with an attitude of indifference as if he were being forced to go. He felt bored and a sense of responsibility towards his long-time partner. Jaehong thought that he had found an opportunity.

   “I don’t understand why those aurora lights are so special for tourists. It means people could do something more valuable than spending money and time there.”

   “Actually, I have thought the same.”

   “Really?”

   “If it were me seven years ago, I might have said that I didn’t understand why people get excited about the phenomenon of the eclipse and the burning of the atmosphere’s molecules.”

   Seven years ago was before they started dating. 

   “What about now?”

   “Now… when the atmosphere’s molecules burn in the eclipse. I hope that oxygen breaks down into ions in smaller quantities than other gasses like nitrogen or neon. Because in the visible light spectrum, Hyung Jaeyoung looks best in red.”

   ________________________________________.

[1]      Double cuff, “ขอ้มอืแบบแขนเบิล้ .” The end of the shirt sleeve folds up into two layers and does not come with buttons. It must be worn with cufflinks or shirt studs. 

[2]      Carpe diem, Latin for “seize the day.” It means to live in the present moment and make the most of it. 

[3]      Single-lens reflex camera, commonly known as SLR Camera. 

[4]      Viewfinder. The visual window. 

[5]      CMOS, Complementary Metal Oxide Semiconductor. It is a sensor where each pixel has sub-circuits that convert incoming light into digital signals instantly. In addition to CMOS sensors, there are also other types of sensors such as CCD, MOS, or JFET, which have different operating principles. The choice of sensor depends on the brand of the camera. 

[6]      RGB, a color system for digital work, abbreviation for red, green, and blue. It is the process of mixing the three primary colors, which are red, green, and blue, to create various colors. 

[7]      Manual focus. Focusing manually. 

[8]      Contrast, Detection, : CDAF. A system, AF, used in Compact cameras, uses the camera sensor to focus by searching for maximum contrast, which is the point with the highest clarity, making the autofocus relatively slow but accurate. 

[9]      Phase, Detection, : PDAD. A system, AF, used in DSLR cameras, separates the incoming light into two parts to create two images. The camera considers the difference in focus points between the two images and calculates the desired direction when moving towards or away from the camera, and the distance, to achieve autofocus. Then, the lens is moved to align them, helping to achieve fast autofocus but with less accuracy compared to CDAF. 

   SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 19: Syntax Error #5. 

When Jaehong missed his chance to reply, silence fell in the car, and the man looked at his wristwatch while leaning against the car’s start button.

“Six minutes have passed. I’ll add one minute to make up for the interruption. Please announce each location you choose.”

“What? Um… just a moment, please.”

Jaehong, who had completely forgotten about the tourist destinations, shifted his attention to the book left open on the armrest, even though he was already late.

“Haven’t thought of anything else? I don’t think I’ve given you little time.

Strange.”

The other party’s tone did not sound reproachful, but Jaehong felt like a student who hadn’t done his homework. Surely, there had never been a situation like this during his school days. And why did the unfinished task have to be this one? He didn’t know. So, Jaehong flipped the paper in front of him in the wrong direction, causing the other party to stare at him with a low voice. 

“I had already thought that you might have something in common because we grew up in the same neighborhood.”

“What does that mean?”

“Hyung Jaeyoung. If I ask him to do something he will be lazy even while doing it, he often doesn’t finish it on time. You, Jaehong, are similar in that aspect.”

“Lazy…lazy? That’s a misunderstanding. I’m just…”

“But the way to deal with it is different.” The man interrupted.

“If it’s Hyung Jaeyoung, he would lock himself up and say that choosing a tour package is the responsibility of the tour guide.”

The other party snatched the travel book from Jaehong’s hand, preventing him from correcting the embarrassing misunderstanding. He placed the thick book back on the console in the car as he smirked.

“The Renaissance Accademia, The Monument of Second World War, Opera

House, City Hall. I recommend this package.”

That was a standard route package similar to high school field trips, a crisis moment where they had to tour only tourist attractions until their feet were almost burnt. He hoped the other party would just play around, but that expression seemed very serious. The fact that Chu Sangwoo was not your average kind of person, not just in terms of atmosphere or charisma, confused Jaehong. His attempt to pretend to be a gentleman must come to an end. It was time for him to assert his leadership.

“Enough about tourism. I want to go to your house more.”

Jaehong raised the corner of his mouth slightly and asked before the man went still for a few seconds.

“Why?”

“I’m a little tired.”

“In that case, I think it would be better for you to get off here. The more you move around, the more tired you’ll get.”

‘Fine. If it’s easy, it won’t be fun.’ 

Jaehong pondered to himself with a slight smile as he thought the driving force of propulsion was amusing. The more cautious and resistant he was, the higher the value of the goal. Although he knew that once it collapsed, it was just a body like any other, Jaehong wanted to overcome the opposing side that always refused.

“No, I want to go to your house.”

“It takes about thirty minutes to get to my house from here. If you want to relax, there are cafes, restaurants, parks, or nearby hotels as reasonable options.”

“I think it would be more fun to go and see your room.”

The other party remained silent as if lost in thought. There was no immediate response.

“I understand. However, if I want to take someone to my house, you need permission from the co-resident first. That means you have to submit documents signed by Hyung Jaeyoung or his voice file.”

“…Ah?”

How would Jang Jaeyoung react to this? If he told Jaeyoung that they would both go to the house, he would definitely refuse. Or maybe that troubled man had changed his mind and hid that man as tightly as before. Yes, this was an opportunity that he had brought. He wouldn’t let it go to waste. 

Jaehong spoke as if he were not disappointed. 

“Jaeyoung… is probably working. I don’t want to disturb him. So let’s go to a nearby hotel.”

“Okay. Let’s head to the Belmont.”

As soon as the man finished speaking, Jaehong reached his hand out to fasten his seatbelt before stopping. When he saw the calm and indifferent posture of the other party, he felt a sense of mystery. Generally, going to a hotel together meant having sex in the room, but in the end, would they both think the same way?

“I don’t know which hotel to go to.”

“You probably don’t know the way around here. So I’ll take you to the lobby, okay?”

“The lobby? Then you…”

“I’ll go back home.”

It was correct that he sensed something was off. The side profile that looked calm and cool was the face of someone who had no idea about Jaehong’s feelings. It wasn’t just rejection without thinking about it. The other party looked at Jaehong’s face before speaking.

“Don’t worry. You’ll definitely like it because it’s a five-star hotel.”

“That’s not a problem, let’s go have coffee in the room first. Don’t rush to leave yet.”

“No, thank you. I already have coffee to drink.”

‘What is wrong with this person?’ 

 

 

Jaehong felt speechless. If the other party did not lack the ability to read the hidden meaning in words or probably pretend not to notice the look that Jaehong sent to him. Whatever the case, both were hopeless, but still, it was better when looking at Chu Sangwoo’s facial expression and the content of the conversation… There was a high chance that it would be the first.

Even at that moment. The other party looked at Jaehong’s safety buckle as if telling him to fasten it. If they went to the hotel like this, it would definitely be over, after dropping off Jaehong at the lobby. The other party would have to leave without even turning back, and Jaehong decided to take a step back and return to at least a slightly hopeful path. 

“Then it’s better to go to the tourist attraction you mentioned for a while.”

That was no different from declaring surrender, the man grabbed the seatbelt without showing any surprise.

“Time is almost up. Fasten your seatbelt.”

“…”

“I might be difficult to listen… to everything, but I will do my best.”

While everything went in the opposite direction of what was expected, the car moved.

‘Damn, you’re so gentle and cute!’ 

Jang Jaehong thought that the other party fell into the trap of the enchanting smile that made people lose consciousness. What is this icebox person he chose to marry?

Jaehong looked out the window as if he didn’t feel anything, but the shock did not easily subside. That man didn’t reach the point of being stiff or afraid of strangers, but what was even more the lack of understanding of social norms…

Yes, that’s right. It’s like a machinery device.

Jaehong felt like surrendering, but he tried to reaffirm his own goal once again. He himself had a goal, even though it might not be the same as the other party’s. Once he set a goal, he wouldn’t easily give up.

While one person was driving, the other person just looked out the window, and the car crossed the bridge.

While driving, the young man explained that the Bascule [1] Bridge took several years to build. How long is it, including the number of cars that traffic on it per year, the weight it can bear, and the sound that doesn’t seem too high or low, like leaving the radio on. When he said that, The other party explained how long the central pavilion by the river was completed in how many years and how many years it has been in use.

Having traveled like this, he must have traveled wonderfully and returned. When the other party stopped explaining for a moment, Jaehong naturally joined the conversation.

“I heard that both of you are getting married.”

“Yes.”

“I would like to congratulate you in advance.”

The man paused in silence, showing that the other person didn’t care about anything special about love. Jaehong smiled coolly and smiled on the other side.

“There is a saying that marriage is the burial ground of love.”

“Yes. I think that is an interesting analogy.”

“Oh, what do you mean by that?”

“Usually, when one step is completed, we often have to start the next step.

Insects also change their shape.”

That party glanced at Jaehong’s face for a moment before speaking with added ritual.

“I don’t mean people who change their sex [2], but insects that change their shape by shedding skin. You are at the same level as Hyung Jaeyoung.”  Jaehong decided that this conversation was hopeless and jumped to the next topic.

“How much time is left until the wedding day?”

“175 days.”

“Poor thing, there is still a long time left. It is not strange that something changes during that time, right?”

“Yeah. I am truly in pain, because there is still so much time left before I can sign the marriage registration. I am trying my best to control any variables that may arise.”

Without knowing if the other party is unwilling or intentionally pretending not to know, the young man accepted Jaehong’s hidden intentions like a blessing and felt touched by it. There was a brief moment of silence.

Chusangwoo took a gentle breath and continued.

“During the 81 months, being in the role of Jang Jaeyoung’s lover has not been easy at all. Even though I made him my husband, I still can’t trust him fully.”

“Well, he is quite a romantic, isn’t he? You must have been exhausted by it all. Personally, I wonder if such low-quality behavior will change after marriage.”

“A romantic?”

The man tilted his head as if not understanding and then asked slowly, as if paying attention.

“I heard that you have been in England for a long time, so you must be more adjusted to the English language. From now on, can we speak in

English?”

“…Not necessary. I use Korean as my mother tongue.”

“Alright then.”

The young man drove in silence for a while. When he saw a stop signal, he stopped and spoke again.

“If it’s not a vocabulary problem, then you must have misunderstood what I said. I was complaining about the external system that can destroy the wedding system, which has had a detrimental impact and made me nervous in a different way.”

Jaehong tried his best to think using his brain, fearing that he would be treated as a foreigner again, but this time he really didn’t understand what the other party was saying.

“What do you mean by external system?”

The other party tightly closed their mouth with a stern expression before lowering their voice and speaking softly.

“I don’t believe in supernatural things like speaking words, making them inauspicious, becoming true. But at a time like this, I don’t want to say that word with my own mouth. A word that starts with ‘h’ or in English, starts with ‘d.’ Just as long as there is no system that is annoying. Then I will be able to fully possess and be truly satisfied, I am feeling sad.”

“Oh, um…”

“Don’t say it out loud!”

“…”

“Let me say it again. I don’t believe in luck.”

‘Jang Jaeyoung, that asshole, is he being held by someone unusual?’ 

Jaehong brooded over himself with a gloomy look in his black eyes, which revealed insanity. The person who described his own lover as ‘useful’ instead of cute or attractive seemed like a bottomless pit in marriage, possession, and something, which is the goal of Jaehong. The only appropriate words to add to him were ‘Jang Jaeyoung’s money’ alone. When he saw the other person’s obvious greed for gold, Jaehong’s intention to interfere with the wedding became stronger.

However, it had been 22 minutes out of two hours and he had not seen any clear results yet. While the man pointed out the poet’s favorite café outside the window, which was still not famous, Jaehong listened sometimes and sometimes not. At the same time, he devised a strategy to find the weak point of the relationship before infiltrating.

“You and Jaeyoung seem to get along well at some level.”

“What does that mean?”

“Long-term couples often argue or not argue so much until they lose interest in each other, and even if they talk about getting married, they eventually break up…”

The words hidden with malicious thoughts made Sangwoo’s hair stand on end.

“Oops, sorry. Please be careful when using words that does synonym with ‘breakup.’”

“…”

“And the disagreements between couples are not words that are synonymous with ‘breakup’ but the positive process of aligning opinions and tightening relationships.”

“It sounds like you argue a lot.”

“Align opinions and tighten relationships frequently.”

Jaehong didn’t miss the undertone hidden in the words. Jaeyoung spoke as if the two of them agreed, but it didn’t seem like Chu Sangwoo thought the same way.

“In most cases, aligning opinions in what matters.”

“Recently, we have been differing opinions on event venues, number of guests, order of ceremonies, catering companies, tuxedo designs, and song selections.”

“Preferences don’t often align.”

“That’s okay. When negotiation becomes difficult, let it be a matter of possibilities.”

“Do you draw lots?”

“We play rock-paper-scissors.”

“…”

“He is quite busy. So, I decided to make some small decisions myself.” The second party, both of them rarely have time together. 

“It’s unfortunate, really. It seems that once salaries have increased, workload has increased as well.”

“Yes. Sometimes I miss the times when he was carefree like a clown during his graduate studies. Every morning, he would complain and refuse to let me go to work, and every evening, he would insist on going out to have fun. Back then, I thought it was annoying… “

“Jang Jaeyoung has a side that acts like a child.”

“Because we’re a family, so I know well. He doesn’t let me sleep at night. During mealtimes, he makes me laugh until I can’t cook properly, and sometimes he pretends to be sick so I can feed him. He disturbs me when I have to go to work… Besides that, he calls me from unknown numbers, sends me big bouquets of flowers, suddenly appears at my workplace and scares me, hides post-it notes with lovely messages all around the house, spray ‘I love you’ on the walls, hides in the wardrobe and then comes out… They think it’s romantic, but sometimes it becomes difficult because he plays too much.”

Jaehong listened intently, thinking that the other party would talk about their dissatisfaction. However, the content turned out to be complaining, and Jaehong bit his tongue and silently nodded.

“That’s a big downside. Other people argue with their spouses about different personalities, alcohol addiction, aggression, or a lack of sexual desire.”

In the last sentence, the young man’s face turned pale, and Jaehong received the third party’s seat. It was common for the frequency of sexual intercourse between a long-term couple to gradually decrease and eventually disappear.  ‘So, it’s a lack of sex. I guess I’ll have to make more effort to increase it.’ ________________________________________.

[1]                   Bascule bridge is a bridge that can be lifted and closed. 

[2]                   The word “sexual perverted” or “transgender” is translated as “변태” (pronounced as “pyeontae”) in Korean, which means the same thing. 

 

    SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 18: Syntax Error #4. 

The short phone conversation created confusion for Jaehong. Although it’s difficult to say why, it didn’t seem like a normal conversation. What’s more, the other person was too cold. If Jaeyoung didn’t use endearing terms like “myself” or “my love,” it wouldn’t seem like they were a couple at all, but it seemed like Jaeyoung didn’t find it strange.

“How are you doing?”

The person in front changed the subject abruptly. Even though they had just asked each other about their well-being thirty minutes ago, Jaehong wasn’t surprised by this.

“Same as always.”

As Jaehong pulled out his tablet from his bag, Jaeyoung raised his hand to cover his eyes.

“That’s strange… Why do the people around me only talk about work?”

Jaehong ignored the other party’s words and focused his gaze on the table filled with neatly organized numbers.

While explaining to Jaeyoung how he managed his assets, someone from the company called Glenn called twice. After that, Jaeyoung said that he had to go to the company and asked why he was being called on his day off when it wasn’t urgent.

About forty minutes later, a German-made Mercedes-Benz sedan appeared on the road. It was a hybrid model that was fuel-efficient and practical, but it’s design was not favored by the newer generation. The black car parked behind a red sports car, perfectly aligned. Then, ‘he’ got out.

During the time Jaeyoung, who used to be a straight man, started dating men, Jaehong thought that the other party he was dating must be more attractive than women. Furthermore, he had heard that the other party was pure-hearted, innocent, and adorable. However, the person in front of Jaehong now seemed far from his imagination.

If Jaeyoung looked like someone you would meet on the main street in the middle of the day, the man seemed like someone who had just left the library, wearing a black polo shirt and black cotton pants that reached his ankles, with a digital watch on his wrist. The other man had a handsome and straightforward appearance, but not to the extent that it would make one gasp, and even though he had a slender figure, he wasn’t small enough to be considered, “adorable.”

Is that Jang Jaeyoung’s lover?’ 

He had expected a well-dressed, stylish man. However, when the person who looked like an Oxford law student appeared, he couldn’t help but feel confused and turned to ask Jaeyoung, but the other party was no longer in their seat.

Jaeyoung did not know when the man in front of him picked something out of his hair and used both hands to brush his cheeks. The two stood talking for a moment. Then they walked side by side towards Jaehong, with Jaeyoung shoulder to shoulder with the other man.

“This is that person and he is from Korea…”

“Nice to meet you.”

“My partner. Chu Sangwoo, we’re getting married at the end of the year.”

Jaeyoung subtly leaned towards the other side, brushing his cheek against the other man, who remained indifferent. He did not resist the difficult situation. Jaeyoung hesitated a moment before pointing at Jaehong with the same finger, but not wholeheartedly.

“Jang Jaehong.”

Then Jaehong looked at the man. When he looked at the other person closely again, he felt that it wasn’t ordinary like the first time. Even though he had a thin and lean figure, it might be due to the fierce and thick eyebrows that made the other person look strong. Moreover, his eyes gave a strange emotion, and the other side didn’t have a charming appearance like Jaeyoung’s playful style, but rather a cool and calm style.

The young man turned his head to look at the person next to him a couple of times before raising his eyebrows and looking at Jaehong, surprised. His lips, which used to be tightly closed, were now wide open, resembling a startled expression.

“You look surprised.”

Jaeyoung looked at the sky and sighed. Then he nudged the other person with his elbow.

“Do you want to say hello?”

“Hello, Jaehong, Jang, nice to meet you.”

The young man spoke with a Korean accent.

‘He probably thinks I can not speak Korean.’ 

It seemed that no matter what, Jang Jaeyoung did not want to introduce Jaehong to the other side to say something strange. Jaehong responded proudly in fluent Korean.

“I’ve heard a lot about you. Chu Sangwoo. I’m Jaehong, nice to meet you.”

The young man turned to gaze at Jaeyoung. Jaeyoung suppressed a laugh, pretending not to notice.

Jaehong reached into his pocket and took out a business card. As he handed the card over politely, the other party also took out his own business card from his wallet.

[Senior Software Engineer. 

Sangwoo-Chu.] 

‘A hardline person.’ 

The business card, which didn’t even have a name in general English, looked stubborn and the young man’s job seemed more secure than Jaehong had anticipated. Meanwhile, Jaehong gathered information that could be collected from small pieces of paper to estimate the other party’s annual income. In the meantime, he also heard whispers of the couple.

“Hyung, Jaehong and Eric are the same person.”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“Look, it’s written on this business card, Eric Jaehong.”

“…Oh, right, that’s true.”

“You’ve met Eric five times, but you’ve never told me before, right? My love here, you intentionally hid the truth.”

“Um, well…”

“You said he’s the finance manager from England!”

“I didn’t lie.”

You said he’s better in English than Korean!”

“That’s the truth.”

“But then why do I feel like I’ve been deceived?”

“Come on, don’t be like that, it’s just your imagination, seriously! Oh, I don’t have time!”

At that moment, Jaeyoung grabbed the young man’s shoulder and forced him to turn around. Then he gently kissed the young man’s cheek and neck a couple of times before pushing him away, looking dissatisfied.

“Let’s go together, are you busy?”

“Hurry up.”

“I told him to send the information by email and we can handle it over the phone.”

“He complained already. I have agreed already.”

While wondering if both of them would argue, Sangwoo gave in. There was no doubt about anything.

“Ok, then I will go first.”

The other side kissed lightly on the corner of Jaeyoung’s lips before turning and walking briskly towards the car.

“Please sit straight in the seat next to the driver.”

Jaeyoung spoke to Jaehong before lifting his travel bag from the table and putting it under the back of the car in a hurry.

‘Now it’s starting, right?’ 

Jaehong opened the driver’s side door and sat down on the gray leather seat. The inside of the car was clean and tidy, without any clutter, and there was no unpleasant smell that usually accompanies cars. Jaehong swept his eyes inside the car before being startled when he saw a heart-shaped picture frame placed beside the driver’s seat.

 [F O R E V E R ☆ L O V E.] 

[O N L Y ★ Y O U.] 

The picture inside the frame was a high-resolution photograph of his twin brother, smiling with snow-capped mountains in the background, which didn’t fit the overall atmosphere of the car.

The young man sat in the driver’s seat, asking.

“Is there a place you want to visit?”

“No, there isn’t any.”

While Jaehong shifted his gaze from the rainbow-colored picture frame, the car owner handed him something heavy, and in Jaehong’s hand was a thick travel guidebook.

“I will give you five minutes. After checking quickly, please let me know your top five preferred places. I want to take you in the most convenient and comfortable way, but since we have to consider the route, I can’t go everywhere if you don’t say your preferred location.”

“…”

He began by opening the homepage first, but before he could read anything, he heard a loud knock on the window.

Tap tap tap!

The car owner looked indifferently for about ten seconds before lowering the window as if realizing he had no choice. At that moment, Jaeyoung leaned in and whispered something in his ear.

“Hmm, I love you too.”

The young man responded to his lover, sounding hesitant, before closing the window again. When Jaeyoung’s face disappeared behind the black window, silence crept in.

However, this time, his gaze that had been straight ahead turned sideways and glanced at him, causing a burning sensation on Jaehong’s cheek. Jaehong turned the page of his book but couldn’t concentrate.

When he saw the head turn sideways, the gaze of the other party immediately met Jaehong’s eyes. Their eyes looked fiercely determined, and for a moment, Jaehong even thought that the other party might lean in to kiss him. Jaehong was not unfamiliar with this kind of gaze, but he felt a sense of accomplishment in the low-quality victory of being Jang Jaeyoung’s lover for a long time.

“Chu Sangwoo, right?”

“…Right?”

“Is there something on my face?”

“No, there’s nothing.”

“If that’s the case, why are you staring at me like that?”

He said with a slight smile, so the other party quickly looked forward.

“You look so much like him that I accidentally… I apologize if it doesn’t feel good.”

I don’t feel bad at all.”

“Is that true?”

“Yes.”

The young man slowly turned his gaze back to Jaehong. The other hesitated before speaking.

“If that’s the case, may I take a closer look for a minute?”

“Well… okay.”

“Then let’s begin.”

As he paused, the other party released the safety buckle. Then, Sangwoo extended his hand to adjust the console, moving closer with precision.

‘No touching allowed. No, not closer than fifty centimeters.’ 

The other party was destroying the fifty centimeters rule, before focusing on Jaehong’s forehead with a seductive pose. Then, Sangwoo tilted Jaehong’s head to look at his side profile for a moment. And then, he sighed softly.

“Wow…”

‘Two hours should be enough.’ 

This game will end with nothing else to see. The way Sangwoo approached their loved one and the way he approached Jaehong were as different as the sky and the earth. In this case, he thought that he could comfortably go to the airport after dealing with everything in the car without going to the hotel and ruining the two-year-long wedding preparations.

Now, the other party slightly turned their head to almost touch Jaehong’s nose. Then, they lowered their eyes to closely examine his lips.

Jaehong swallowed hard, the distance between them being close enough to count the number of eyelashes lined up like a fan, the other party’s transparent skin, their black hair and bright eyes making the clear difference even more visible. Under the red lips was a pale and slender neck, the black dot that protruded from the collar of the shirt clearly prominent.

‘Sexier up close.’ 

Jaehong secretly felt curious about the well-groomed young man. Jang Jaeyoung said he was dating the other party because he was ‘adorable,’ but there were many people in this world who were even more adorable than him. Jaeyoung, who could easily date models or actors, must have a reason for being captivated by this man, such as his skills in bed.

The atmosphere shifted and flirtation disappeared without a trace as the young man returned to his seat. He sat down, securely fastening his seatbelt, as if nothing had happened. When he looked at the clock, he realized that a minute had passed.

“You can look again if you want.”

“No, it’s fine. Even though there are still a couple of places I’d like to check…”

The other party hesitated before speaking.

“I have a conscience. I won’t ask for anything inappropriate from my partner’s family.”

“…”

The conversation ended, and Jaehong looked out the window for a moment before brushing his chin with the back of his hand.

“The weather is nice. The sky has been clear like this all day.”

“The maximum temperature today is 26°C, which is slightly higher than the average temperature during the summer here. It’s considered good weather for sightseeing, and there are no forecasts of rain. No need to worry.”

“That’s good to know.”

“Although there is a 7% chance of rain, it’s not a big deal. Most activities are indoors, and there are also two umbrellas in the back seat.”

The direction of the conversation was strangely off, and the young man turned on the air conditioning silently, while listening to a loud noise for a while. Jaehong felt an oddly lonely atmosphere, so he picked a more suitable topic of conversation.

“I heard that you both met at university.”

“Yes.”

“Did Jaeyoung fall in love with you and now he’s chasing after you?”

“He can be annoying at times, but sometimes it may not be love.”

He thought that this could be a topic of conversation for ten minutes, but the conversation ended in three seconds.

“If that’s the case, Chu Sangwoo, you must have fallen in love with him first.”

“No, that’s not the case.”

“Uh.”

The conversation ended instantly, with Jaehong coughing twice before continuing to speak.

Our first impression of each other isn’t very good.”

“Yes. I think it’s like discovering antibiotics.”

“Huh?”

“Penicillin. Initially it was thought to be a harmful mold, but it turned out to be a beneficial living thing.”

“…”

 

    SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 17: Syntax Error #3. 

   The once straight lips twisted in a mocking manner, but his cold eyes remained still. Jaeyoung took a deep breath as if he had just heard something pointless before speaking slowly, but with intimidation hidden within.

   “I’ve been patient this whole time because I see you as part of the family.

   Jaehong, ah, but there won’t be a second time.”

   “And if it’s not because of the family?”

   “Fund Manager [1] J, a hypothetical name, sexually harassed his engaged brother’s fiance before being murdered and sent to the emergency room.”

   “…”

   “Would you like to appear on TV?”

   Jaeyoung appeared to be unconscious. When Jaehong pulled back his chair slightly, his watchful eyes followed him immediately.

   “I’m already exhausted and annoyed, and you come here. Why?”

   The atmosphere seemed like it would explode if it continued like this, so Jaehong decided it would be best to tell the truth.

   “I came to cancel the wedding.”

   Jaeyoung frowned, and Jaehong looked straight into the eyes of his twin brother and said.

   “Step back before it gets messier than this, Jang Jaeyoung.”

   “What?”

   “Don’t get married.”

   “Why?”

   Jaeyoung’s face turned pale and surprised. While Jaehong spoke with a cutting tone.

   “You, you used to say that marriage is a ‘shackles’, right? Now, I don’t know why you’ve changed your mind, but does it seem fitting? Just a normal relationship or a wedding that everyone does.”

   “…”

   “Hey idiot, you stray dog, just because you’re given a leash doesn’t mean you turn into a house dog. Do you really think someone who has experienced freedom would willingly give up their single life? Not me. Stop doing things that don’t align with who you really are and go back to being the boss you used to be.”

   Jaeyoung sat listening with a tense expression before bursting into laughter when Jaehong finished speaking. This time, it wasn’t mocking laughter, but it seemed to be more genuinely amused laughter.

   “Do you think I’m the boss?”

   “What do you mean?”

   “Whether I get married or not, it doesn’t mean I’ll be single.”

   “…”

   “Don’t you understand? I’ve been wearing this ‘collar’ that says ‘Chu

   Sangwoo’ right here for seven years now.”

   “That’s exactly why I’m telling you to take it off.”

   “I have a tattoo too. Look.”

   “No. Don’t.”

   “Look, it’s really beautiful.”

   “I already told you no.”

   Jaeyoung made an attempt to show the initials of his partner’s name as a tattoo, so he had to restrain himself. The other party leaned back in the chair and lit an e-cigarette once again.

   “Okay, well… even though you’re doing something useless, you flew here for my happiness. That’s impressive. I’ll consider it a congratulations on our wedding.”

   “Agreed. Did I come here for nothing?”

   “It’s for my partner. Even if a nuclear bomb falls in the next five minutes, I can still organize a wedding by having someone officiate the ceremony immediately. You’re not the type of person who can ruin that.”

   The other party smirked with a nonchalant face and blew out smoke, Jaehong even forgot what he wanted to say for a moment.

   Jang Jaeyoung never once expressed a desire to get married, as if he himself didn’t want to get married to that extent, but because of the strong desire of his partner and because Jaeyoung himself didn’t want any problems with the other party, he reluctantly agreed to get married, which Jaehong didn’t like that image at all.

   “Have you ever wondered why he is so obsessed with getting married?”

   “It’s just his nature.”

   “Don’t you ever think that you are being used?”

   “Used? For what?”

   “For example, money.”

   Jaeyoung laughed and then sighed before reluctantly responding.

   “That kid has a lot of money, you know. You should see the amount he has saved up as capital for his wedding. It’s really scary…” Then he sighed again.

   Getting married is a business, and trusting the other party without considering the risks is something that should be prohibited. Jaehong, who knew Jaeyoung well and could analyze the benefits and disadvantages in joint ventures, sometimes the other party might change their mind, but because they didn’t see each other often, he didn’t notice.

   Jaehong just sighed at his older brother, not really thinking anything. He wanted to leave London and let him know and suffer, but his sense of responsibility kept him from doing so.

   “If I am confident that I can ruin the wedding, what would you do?”

   “You?”

   The indifferent gaze of Jaeyoung destroyed his pride.

   The fact that two people who went to the same university happened to be in a relationship was a common occurrence. If you date someone first, now the person next to you may be someone else. Love? Dating to understand each other? They are just faint images that can easily be shattered with a little external force.

   “Give me a chance, I’ll handle it myself.”

   That cute guy, the man who destroyed Jaeyoung’s main pride and turned him into a foolish person, Jaehong was blindly and unreasonably in love with him.

   Jaehong was confident that he could destroy that wrong understanding.

   “And while talking, there must be no one around.”

   “So, should I let you two fight each other?”

   It shouldn’t take long to relax like that, but Jaeyoung looked calm and quiet.

   Jaehong had previously destroyed wedding work after being caught having a relationship with the groom while undressing the bride, and there was nothing he couldn’t do. In fact, he was the most suitable man for this job. He just didn’t have much experience with dating anyone before. But for one-night stands, he had countless experiences. He had a talent for seducing the opposite party on the opposite night, whether they were playful, sophisticated, smart, or foolish, he had no exceptions.

   The couple had been dating for seven years, but from what Jaehong had seen from the people around them, at this point, all there was left was boredom and indifference. Jang Jaeyoung’s lover is only a man, a student who graduated from a prestigious Korean university, an engineer at a reputable company, who had the ability to estimate in an instant. If he saw someone getting married with deceit, could Jang Jaeyoung still remain calm?

   “You have misunderstood for a long time, Jaehong.”

   “About what?”

   “That’s why I didn’t let you meet Sangwoo until now. Not because I was afraid that he would fall in love with you.”

   Jaehong felt like his thoughts were being read. Jaeyoung stared at him and continued to speak.

   “I don’t like that kid looking at other people. If you show up, he will have to look at you with surprise, and I’m sure I won’t feel good… So, I just avoid it.”

   “…”

   “Instead of thinking about seeing that situation in the ceremony, it would be better to deal with it and finish it.”

   Jaeyoung asked with a relaxed posture.

   “How long do you need?”

   “What do you think?”

   “I will let you meet one-on-one, whether you want to bribe or tease, it’s up to you.”

   He wondered if he had heard correctly.

   “Are you serious?”

   Jaeyoung paused with a neutral face, not seeming to be playing around, just like when he allowed Jaehong to create chaos in our long-lasting relationship without any responsibility. Jaehong seized the opportunity without hesitation.

   “Until midnight tonight.”

   “You rascal has no conscience.”

   “…”

   “You haven’t seen him for a whole week. How dare you hold on until dawn?”  Jaeyoung opened his mouth wide, afraid that it would tear before he could speak again.

   “I’ll give you two hours, do whatever you want.”

   “Two… hours? Do whatever I want?”

   “Or not.”

   Jaehong reached out for the other arm as if to stand up and pulled him back down onto the chair.

   Deceiving an engaged man who has been dating for a long time within a twohour period. Although it’s not easy, this is the only way to destroy Jaeyoung’s firm belief in his loved one.

   “Understood.”

   Immediately, Jaeyoung relaxed.

   “Conditions.”

   “What?”

   “No touching. No, don’t get closer than fifty centimeters.”

   It’s a narrow-minded condition, but just accepting it is enough… If avoiding getting close is the condition, then just make the other party come closer, isn’t it? Jaehong has deceived foreigners with his eyes without saying anything countless times.

   “Prohibited from using computers, prohibited from requesting or repairing any machinery equipment.”

   Even though I may not understand the purpose, it is not a difficult condition.

   Jaehong waits for the next words.

   “Prohibited from forcing with any alcohol that Chu Sangwoo refuses.”

   Jang Jaeyoung, who had previously said to do as I wish, gradually added more restrictions before my turn arrived.

   “No response, huh.”

   “What?!”

   “If you violate even one condition, you will die by my hands. Understand?”

   “I know.”

   “And I’m saying this for your own good…”

   “What?”

   “Don’t think he’s easy because he looks cute? Well, that’s a black belt martial artist and a captain in the reserve army of the army. He runs very fast.”

   “…”

   Jaeyoung picked up the phone, and after the background image of the sea appeared, he opened the contact list and dialed the latest number. The loud volume made the sound of waiting for the call be heard outside slightly. Jaehong didn’t have the leisure to eavesdrop on phone conversations with villagers, but he subtly moved his chair closer and listened with great curiosity.

   The waiting tone lasted three times before the call was answered.

   [Hello.] 

   The sound at the other end of the line sounded solid like a stubborn person, but Jaeyoung didn’t react as if this sound was normal.

   “Sangwoo, I’m starting work now. I have to go to work for a while.”

   [What kind of work?] 

   “It seems that the project we agreed on that Glenn will take care of will be handed over to me according to the client’s request. He scheduled a meeting to pass on the documents and explain them to me before going on vacation.”

   At the end of the line, Jaehong quietly picked up his coffee cup and tapped the edge of his lips, but his attention was focused on the side.

   [If I suspect that you don’t want to burden yourself and sneak out to play, Then I must do the same too, right?] 

   “So in other words you have a deep imagination.”

   Jaeyoung grabbed the phone, squeezing it tightly in his hand.

   “Sangwooya, my little brother, Jang Jaehong.”

   [Oh, ‘that person who looks like an old man’, what else?] 

   “I don’t know about that. He’s secretly listening to our phone conversation right now, you know.”

   […] 

   “Seems like he is here on vacation.”

   [Wait, earlier you said you were meeting Eric.]

   “Although it’s hard to believe, they’re both here.”

   [Exactly, it’s just an accidental encounter?] 

   “Uh, um.. I have to go to the company, so could you show him around here a bit?”

   [Really? Should I introduce myself?] 

   Finished with a question concealed by excitement, Jaeyoung’s face appeared slightly absent-minded. It seemed that normally, he would enthusiastically introduce Jaehong as well. Jaeyoung gritted his teeth and spoke.

   “Of course, I’ll introduce him. It’s my ‘little brother’ here for love, and also,

   ‘family’, just like you.”

   [Then why did you say he didn’t want to come until now?] 

   “That’s my business.”

   [Okay, when should I go out to meet him then?] 

   As soon as he heard the young man ask anxiously, Jaeyoung replied with a slightly dissatisfied manner.

   “Yeah.”

   [How can I go now? Shouldn’t I get ready first?] 

   “What do you need to prepare? Do you want to do makeup?”

   [We need to plan the travel itinerary in advance.] 

   Jaeyoung’s previously gloomy expression slightly eased.

   “I told you, the downside of love is being too kind-hearted. Just taking him to see the places he should see is enough.”

   [I wonder if following the local way of life can fulfill the expectations of tourists.] 

   “There’s a tour package you arranged for when your parents and sister came.

   Uncle.”

   [At that time, there were five people in the group. If we include me and you, there would be seven people.] 

   “Myself.”

   [Huh?] 

   “Jaehong said he’ll handle himself. Come here first.”

   […] 

   “Come just as you are. No need to change clothes. I won’t comb my hair.”

   [Send the location via text message.] “Click.” And the line was cut.

   ________________________________________. 

   [1] Fund Manager. 

    

    SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 16: Syntax Error #2. 

   They agreed to meet between the airport and Jaeyoung’s house, even though it was supposed to be in the middle, according to the map, it was very close to

   Jaeyoung’s house. However, the other party did not arrive on time, causing Jaehong to wait for almost an hour.

   Jaehong was at an outdoor cafe, drinking espresso under the sun shining down on his head. In the meantime, he sent three emails to clients and talked on the phone with high-level executives of an insurance company.

   – [But Mister Jang, I heard that you took a vacation… I wonder if I misunderstood.] 

   [I did take a vacation, but there is still some time remaining.] 

   – [Haha, you’re still as dedicated as ever. Where did you go on your trip?] 

   [I am on the west coast of America.] 

   – [Sounds like a place with great weather.] 

   While Jang Jaeyoung was about to answer, Jaeyoung arrived. Although the windshield was tinted and made it difficult to see the driver’s face, it was clear that there was someone driving – a red Ferrari Superfast parked by the small coffee shop.

   [I guess I have to hang up now. If you have any other business, please send me an email.] 

   – [Okay! Have fun on your hot holiday.] 

   Jaehong hung up the phone and looked at his twin brother who had just gotten out of a high-performance sports car with a long hood.

   They hadn’t seen each other for a year. The other side still looked the same. Jaeyoung was wearing a white button-down shirt with rolled-up sleeves that reached his elbows and beige shorts, with half of his face hidden behind sunglasses. He wondered why the other side always dressed so elegantly, but of course, his brother was wearing turquoise loafers.

   Jaeyoung raised his arm over his shoulder to lock his car with the key. Then he walked towards Jaehong with an emotionless face.

   ‘Hollywood Star came on its own.’

   The onlookers from the nearby table, who used to eye Jaehong, were now drawn in the opposite direction. Jaehong felt used to this feeling because even though they looked alike, Jaeyoung always attracted attention from people since they were kids.

   Jaehong was quite reserved, unlike his twin brother who enjoyed attention from others. He was the type who knew how to attract attention and use it. When they were kids, they had to move frequently due to their dad’s job. No matter which country they went to, the other side could quickly learn the language and make other kids become like his groupies. That boy grew up to be a topic of conversation wherever he went.

   When they heard that he would study abroad, Jaehong thought the other side would remain quiet for a while, but it turned out not to be the case. Jang Jaeyoung worked as an album cover designer for a hip-hop artist and became a star designer. His non-traditional album cover, which used symbols that could be interpreted in many ways, became a scorching subject of discussion and even caused controversies, parodies, art, and more. It was considered the most problematic artwork of the year. Even the New York Times and Times were caught and dragged into the mud, asking, ‘Is this art or vulgarity?’ Eventually, the President of the United States made a condemnation comment on social media, causing the issue to spread worldwide like a wildfire, and the result was an intelligent rapper who had been anonymous for a long time rising to the top of the Billboard charts. Meanwhile, Jaeyoung was named the

   ‘Most Eye-Catching Graphic Designer of the Year.’

   Jaeyoung increased his worth with personal projects and occasionally participated in exhibitions. After completing his master’s degree, he worked for a branding company and is currently an art director, receiving attention for his outstanding works, such as designing logos for famous sports brands, changing the NBA team logos, and more.

   “Don’t you have any work to do?”

   The arrogant graphic designer who had a good background and made good fortune whispered as he took off his sunglasses, his eyes wanting to see the side face of the other party. However, Jaeyoung sat down opposite Jaehong without paying the slightest attention and opened his mouth wide.

   “Didn’t you sleep?”

   “I just came back from Copenhagen three hours ago, so I’m dying.”

   “You could have slept on the plane.”

   “I was watching a movie.”

   “I guess we should meet at the airport.”

   “I really want to see something at home, even if I don’t get to see it.”

   Jaeyoung wiped away the remaining tears from the corners of his eyes before placing his cell phone, wallet, car keys, and something in a white envelope on the table. He called for a waiter and ordered a Caffè Americano with lots of ice, and carelessly handed a white envelope with his index and middle fingers. The far right corner was written with a chicken scratch that was difficult to read even with good vision.

   [Jang Jae-Hong.] 

   Jaehong opened the envelope and frowned. When he opened the white background card, he found the names of the two grooms, the wedding date, and a rough map.

   “Why did you print the invitation cards?”

   “They got prepared two years ago.”

   “…”

   “My partner is very meticulous in preparing everything.”

   “The design doesn’t seem suitable for you.”

   “It wasn’t like this at first, I’ve revised it twelve times.”

   Is it too late to turn back? Jaehong looked deep into Jaeyoung’s eyes, but the other party seemed reluctant and looked only tired and pathetic. 

   “Man, you don’t seem to be looking forward to it.”

   “I’ve been engaged for five years and have been preparing for two years. I’m not impressed with anything special anymore.”

   Jaeyoung looked at his nails and casually replied with a white gold ring with small embedded diamonds on his fourth finger.

   “Not yet.”

   Six months? Jaehong evaluated the remaining time in his mind.

   Jaehong’s coworker broke off the engagement two days before the wedding. No. Let’s not talk about the distant past. The fiance of the man Jaehong fell for suddenly appeared at the dormitory when he and that man were becoming intimate with each other. When they went back and forth, he found out that the apartment was a dormitory where the couple would move in together in a month, after the wedding. And they broke off the wedding without looking pretty in front of Jaehong.

   While he was considering what to say, Jaeyoung’s ringtone suddenly became louder. Jaeyoung quickly answered the call and used both hands to hold the communication device close to his ear.

   “Oh, are you home?”

   Jaehong squinted at his twin brother as if he were a stranger.

   “Really? It was quiet there. Oh, and now I’m so exhausted as if I’m about to die. Hurry up and come help me quickly. Oh, someone asked me to come out and meet him for a moment. Didn’t you see the message? Did you see it? It’s a friend whom you don’t know, well… really.”

   The other person raised their eyebrows and glanced at Jaehong before quickly looking back at the table.

   “Well, tell you the truth, he is a friend named Eric… the financial manager I met when we went to work in Berlin, that English guy.”

   Jang Jaeyoung’s condition was worse off than he had imagined. Even though he might say it himself, he had to be caught one day, but he thought it was a

   joke. The other person must have held some vulnerable point to impress him like that. And furthermore, ‘the financial manager who is an English person’, is that so? Even though it’s not a lie, that’s not the best description either.

   “Well, are you coming back soon? I want to see you soon.”

   Jaeyoung spoke like an idiot with a stupid face. Then, when he puts down the phone, he looks at the cone and criticizes it.

   “Really curious.”

   As soon as he puts the phone on the table, the background image appears immediately, a picture of Jaeyoung hugging ‘that man’ from behind, resting his chin on his shoulder. That man is wearing sunglasses, making his face unclear. In addition, Jaeyoung covers the top section of the person’s arm with a towel, making it impossible to know what the shape is. Judging from the legs, it can only be guessed that ‘that man’ figure is thin.

   “What are you looking at?”

   Jaeyoung reached out his hand to lock the screen, Jaehong reluctantly looked at the black screen unable to speak.

   “We… aren’t going to the sea, right?”

   When they were eight, they played at the seaside and almost died together. After that, both of them developed aquaphobia and Jaehong never dreamed of playing in the water by the beach or bathing in the tub again. Jaeyoung responds carelessly.

   “I conquered it six years ago.”

   “Did you undergo therapy?”

   “No, I just wanted to see him in a swimsuit. So, I couldn’t help it.”

   “…”

   “I even surfed.”

   “You… surf? On the water?”

   “Yes, well, here it is, Scuba Dive Running, have you heard of it?”

   Jaeyoung sighed heavily once again and grabbed something from his pants pocket, a vape, that’s it. The man in front of Jaehong seems to be more unfamiliar every time.

   “Are you going to quit smoking?”

   “Not to that extent.”

   “Then… why?”

   “Stop making it a habit, once a year.”

   “…”

   Jaeyoung blinked slowly and then took a puff of his e-cigarette. Meanwhile, drinks were being served. A male staff placed plastic cups on the tray on the table. There was a Spanish-looking young man who seemed to be in his early twenties and looked sexually provocative, but Jaeyoung didn’t even glance at him. Instead, Jaehong tried to take his gaze away from the staff and looked at Jaeyoung.

   “Throughout these seven years…have you really only been dating that one man?”

   “Yes.”

   “You’ve never broken up even once?”

   “Like a high-speed train in a sleeper.”

   “Never looked at anyone else?”

   “What? Chu Sangwoo is not that daring.”

   “No, I mean you.”

   “What? Are you saying that I will definitely die like that or be imprisoned for life?”

   Jaeyoung’s face turned pale and his body trembled. Jaehong lowered his voice, pressed the volume down, and called the other person’s name softly.

   “Jang Jaeyoung.”

   “What?”

   “Just tell me what weakness you have been trapped in. I’ve come to help you.”

   Jaeyoung sprayed the coffee he had just drunk out. Jaehong looked at the ceiling, wiped his mouth with a cloth, wiped his mobile phone and arm with his gaze. After the small but chaotic incident passed, Jaeyoung’s lips curled into a smile, unable to speak.

   “So, you’ve come on a vacation, haven’t you? I’m just playing around.”

   “Haa?”

   “But it’s not just a fling.”

   “So what is it?”

   “Because I was captured by the weakness called a heart.”

   He wondered if the man sitting across from him, with a red face while sipping coffee, was really his older brother. While Jaeyoung quietly looked at his watch, Jaehong sighed and pulled his hair in frustration.

   Unreasonable anger and suppressed emotions engulfed him. If he wasn’t pressured to get married, it would mean Jaeyoung chose that man himself. It would be normal for someone else to help with marriage after being together with someone for a long time and being accustomed to it. But Jang Jaeyoung, whom Jaehong knew, was the type of person who didn’t want to do it. No matter what method, Jaehong refused to do it.

   “Why are you dating that man?”

   “It’s embarrassing to talk about it.”

   “There must be a reason, right? I don’t understand.”

   Jaehong couldn’t believe it. The fact that the person in front of him had been dating only one person for so long, and that he planned to get married without even the slightest resistance. Jaeyoung shrugged and answered.

   “There’s nothing special, just… he’s cute.”

   “His appearance?”

   When Jaehong laughed mockingly, the other party spoke nonchalantly.

   “Our personalities match well. Besides that, there’s something else… actions, ways of thinking, tone of voice, way of speaking, atmosphere, gaze. Even in terms of cleanliness, he’s good. Altogether, he’s just cute.”

   “…”

   “Sometimes, I’m surprised when I see him beside me. Oh, that kid, he’s unbelievably cute.”

   Jaehong was greatly impacted mentally, but he pretended not to feel anything and casually asked.

   “Hey, if you date someone else for the first time, you might change your mind.”

   “That’s not the case. Besides, it’s already too late.”

   “What do you mean by ‘too late’?”

   “I’ve already said it. If you want to quit, you have to exchange it with your life.”

   Jaeyoung smiled casually while sipping coffee, looking unlike someone who speaks in a serious tone. The other person’s eyes curved into a mischievous smile.

   “Sounds like a joke, huh? Well, it’s not. I’m serious.”

   Once he thought that Jaeyoung, who lived according to his own desires, was cool. However, now he has changed from aggressive investing to a safer investment approach. Jaehong couldn’t stand the fact that Jaeyoung, who used to live a remarkable life, had become mediocre.

   “So, you’re just like the others.”

   Although Jaeyoung pondered the question, Jaehong considered it an acceptance.

   “Even if it’s you, you should give the other party a chance to play with another man.”

   Jaeyoung’s eyes narrowed slightly, as if he was in a daze. The other person stared at Jaehong silently before finally breaking the ice.

   “Did you mistakenly eat the upper part of the machine or something?”

   Jaehong easily noticed the caution from that fierce expression. Now he understood why Jang Jaeyoung had kept his love hidden to such an extent. He laughed instinctively.

   “You’re not confident enough, huh?”

   “What?”

   “You’re afraid that he won’t care about you if he sees me and so you won’t introduce us, right?”

   Jaeyoung looked at Jaehong calmly, substituting his answer with a cold gaze.

   Jaehong returned the gaze challengingly.

   “Why hide him like that? What would I do if he actually cares about me?”

   “…”

   “For me, a throuple is not a problem.”

   SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

 

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 15: Syntax Error #1. 

   [This plane will travel from London Heathrow Airport to San Diego International Airport, with an estimated arrival time of 11 hours and 46 minutes, and is expected to have a temperature of 24 degrees Celsius….] 

   The young woman hurriedly boarded the plane while listening to the captain’s announcement. Along the narrow aisle, apart from herself, there were only flight attendants walking back and forth. As for the passengers, they were all seated with their seat belts fastened.

   “It’s a good idea to end up in Business Class. Otherwise, there is no hope of walking to the end of the plane.”

   The young woman tied her blonde hair on her neck, slightly sweaty, before lifting her bag and placing it in the overhead compartment. As she was about to sit down, she caught the eye of the man sitting next to her.

   The Asian man in a gray silk suit sat quietly, holding a notepad in his hand. The formal atmosphere combined with his open forehead, which revealed his hairline, made him look like a high-ranking businessman. But in reality, he was just an ordinary young man, with slightly powdered hair, before diverting his gaze back to the notepad. The young woman slowly took her seat.

   The young woman sneakily glanced at the other side while he was jotting something down in the notepad with a leaking ink pen. Could he be a successful businessperson from a young age or the heir to a large corporation? Or perhaps he’s an unknown Korean or Hong Kong actor in Europe?

   At that moment, the black ink pen slipped from his finger, falling to the floor and rolling to hit her shoe.

   [Excuse me, can you hand it back to me?] 

   His voice was low and heavy, making it seem like he was a foreigner. But once she heard him speak, she realized he was an Englishman with a fluent RP [1] accent.

   [Yes, sure.] 

   The young woman replied with a smile, extending a pen. Then her eyes, which were more brown than black, looked at him. And in an instant, the young man expressed his gratitude gently, but he didn’t show any interest in her, which was a pity.

   ‘He looks like a second-generation fortune teller, a high-ranking resident, fluent in 4 languages, a member of the Cricket Club [2], rides horses and yachts, and went to a prestigious school. Then he graduated from the Economics 

   Faculty of Cambridge University and is about to start working in the city.’ 

   While the young woman brushes her long hair, the young man put his notepad and a soaked pen into his briefcase and took out a book, a newly published Japanese novel, a bestseller. It was just like the book she had in her handbag.

   [I’m reading that book too.] 

   As she picked up the book and opened it to the page where she left off, she immediately heard a deep, soothing voice from the side.

   [I don’t know if it has such a detailed portrayal of emotions that it becomes implausible. If it’s like that, I think I’ll stop reading.] 

   [The description by the author is so detailed and intricate, as if it perfectly portrays the emotions of the dog.] 

   [Thank you for saving my time.] 

   The young man closed the book and put it back in his bag. This time, he held a tablet in his hand and the young woman thought that maybe her playful guess about what he was doing in his free time might be correct.

   [Are you going to do something in California?] 

   Upon hearing her question casually, the young man immediately replied without taking his eyes off the screen.

   [I heard the news that my sibling who lives there is getting married.] 

   [That’s great news.] 

   The young man, who used to have a calm and cool expression, smiled slightly, with a sexy crease between his eyebrows, the young woman thought.

   [No. It’s sad news because he is not suitable for the institution of marriage.] 

   [So, you decided to join the army to help your siblings from that scary system, huh?] 

   [Well, for now at least. I don’t know if it will go as planned.] 

   The young man continued to look at his tablet while asking the girl where she wanted to go. It seemed more like a polite question rather than a genuine curiosity, but either way, it was an opportunity to draw attention to himself.

   The girl smiled playfully.

   [It’s just a solo vacation, really. I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t even seen the sun or the moon. But, oh well. I guess looking at London’s boring sky won’t help either. So, I thought I’d go sunbathe on the beach alone for a week.] 

   [Sounds like a good daydream plan.] 

   Even though she had mentioned being single twice, it was still an acceptable response. She wondered if he was married and looked at his left hand, but there was no ring. So, she decided to take another chance and try her luck.

   [Going to a beautiful place after being in a crowded city is like a good omen. My name is Susan.] 

   [Nice to meet you, I am Eric.] 

   She thought that was a name that matched well with her classic appearance.

   At the same time, the girl took out her business card and handed it to the other party. He was a neurosurgeon, a position that would definitely leave an impression. It was an opportunity not to be missed.

   The man took the business card first, then took out a leather wallet from his inner suit pocket with a calm expression. When he opened the wallet halfway and revealed an expensive picture, the picture of him holding a girl, the young man checked his wallet and shrugged as if disappointed.

   [Looks like I forgot to bring my business cards. I apologize.] 

   ‘You already have a child!’ 

   The girl felt disappointed but immediately gave in. Hoping that such a handsome man would still be single was looking at the world too positively from the start.

   [Oh, it’s okay. I’m glad we had a chance to talk and exchange. I’m tired now. I guess I’ll have to rest my eyes for a while.] 

   The girl smiled as if nothing had happened and took a blindfold from the seat pocket in front of her.

   ***.

   The young man folded his wallet and put it in his shirt pocket again. The photo that he intentionally kept always had a good effect. In addition, there are advantages different from a fake wedding ring that can be picked out and shown only when you want to show it, that’s it. 

   The girl in the picture is the four-year-old daughter of a Chinese colleague. Sometimes back, she might be ten years old now. The girl with her eyes covered and turned her face the other way is a beautiful girl with a brain, but for him, she is just a goal that he doesn’t belong to. 

   The young man, or Jaehong, doesn’t care about the opposite gender at all, even a little bit. At the age of sixteen, while his twin brother was pursuing a blonde girl in the same class because he wanted to be friends with her, Jaehong secretly liked the Arab boy in the next class. 

   He studied at an old private school in the United Kingdom, graduated from  Senior School with the top rank, graduated from the prestigious Economics faculty of a world-renowned university with second-class honors, and became the director of the most important risk management fund of a major bank in London’s financial district. Jaehong is a conservative and likes perfectionism, he has a cautious personality and only walks on suitable and appropriate paths. 

   He is well aware that his preference for the same gender is a weakness, but since he cannot change it, he accepts it and continues to live, but not in a way that is publicly revealed. 

   [Dating: 0 times. 

   Night Stand: Over 700 times.] 

   He often goes to crowded areas or tourist attractions, meets unfamiliar men from a distance, and doesn’t meet them for a second time. He also keeps his preferences tightly closed to the people around him. Not only with his father who would kick him out of the house as soon as he found out the truth, but also with his friends and co-workers. He keeps his secrets tightly with only one person in this world who knows the truth.

   “Looking for someone? Sir?”

   He had his first experience at the age of seventeen with a male student he didn’t know, even the name, in the bathroom of the dormitory. Jaehong was so distraught that he had to call his twin brother in Korea after hearing the story that he had sex with another male student. Jang Jaeyoung seemed amused.

   “But what should I do? I’m busy, that’s it.”

   Then the other party seemed disinterested. Although it was not the response he expected, Jaehong felt relieved as if he had been comforted by something that didn’t seem significant to the other party. And when he found out that Jaeyoung didn’t talk to his family about the secret he shared, he began to trust the other party.

   Jaeyoung was a celebrity, always dating someone, and the partner changed every time he asked. He heard that Jaeyoung hadn’t been in a relationship for more than a year. When he saw that the other party had a clear problem, Jaehong felt relieved.

   [Incoming call, Bebe.]

   And then, seven years ago, Jaehong accidentally found out that Jaeyoung was dating a man at their uncle’s funeral.

   The other party didn’t explain anything, but the voice he heard on the phone was clearly a man’s voice, after answering the call. Jaeyoung acted strangely, even though he had caused trouble several times, the other party still had a good relationship with his grandfather, who was not a man who allowed his beloved grandson to miss family gatherings.

   Jaehong helped resolve the situation. At the same time, he wondered who that man was and what he said. Jang Jaeyoung had left everything and went to find the other party.

   While busy with work, time passed. Jaehong focused on his work, got promoted twice, and made a lot of money from managing stocks for politicians and actors, writing columns in business magazines, and had engraved his name as ‘Portfolio Manager [3]’ and ‘Financial Analyst’ on his business card.

   While Jaehong spent nights with many men he didn’t know, it seemed that

   Jaeyoung continued to date “Bebe,” who called him “Hyungnim” all the time.

   All the information Jaehong knew about that man was that he was younger by less than two years, a programmer, good-looking, and friendly. When it came to a secret lover, Jaeyoung was too reserved to even speak about it. He wouldn’t even let anyone see his picture. Even though he reluctantly asked him to introduce him during the first two years, the other party adamantly refused.

   ‘No way, over my dead body.’ 

   After they had been dating for three years. The other party kept making meaningless excuses, making even himself embarrassed.

   ‘Who? Oh, him? Seems like he went to work somewhere outside.’ 

   ‘He’s busy cleaning the keyboard. He couldn’t come out.’ 

   ‘He’s taking care of a sick cat.’ 

   ‘Watering the plants, busy.’ 

   And then Jaehong, who wondered if the man his twin was in relationship with really existed, received shocking news as the hot summer of the eighth year approached.

   [@gmystler.] 

   Jae, my good friend, is getting married in December. From next year onwards, I probably won’t have to listen to him brag about his boyfriend anymore, but instead, he will be bragging about his married husband!] It’s hard to believe the wedding news of my identical twin brother that he saw on the social media feed of the Hollywood actor, Jaehong immediately called Jaeyoung.

   [What? Why are you calling?] 

   “Jang Jaeyoung, are you getting married?”

   [The rumor has reached you too.] 

   “…”

   [Don’t come.] 

   “Why?”

   [Just kidding. If you come, um… wear a mask, don’t show your face.] 

   “Stop kidding… Are you really getting married?”

   [Yes.] 

   “Please don’t tell me it is to that ‘man.’”

   [Where else do I have another one? Busy, that’s all.] Jaehong was very surprised.

   They were completely different, but maybe it was because they saw their parents separate badly, that they had the same attitude towards marriage.

   Jaehong was satisfied with occasional casual relationships from the beginning. While Jaeyoung didn’t restrict his dating with anyone, he also spoke without hesitation, saying, ‘Marriage is a trash system.’

   Jaehong used to think that if one of them were to get married, that person would be willing to conform to social customs. Even though they didn’t like going to school the same way, while the younger brother endured and held back, the older brother opened the window and escaped outside.

   “Are you going to get married then?”

   Although Jaehong is more into one night stands than someone who has never been in a one night stand relationship before like Jang Jaeyoung, he is still far from being truly genuine. It’s hard to believe someone who easily gets bored with a relationship and is always looking for new excitement. Is he really thinking of getting married? That’s like being tied to one person for the rest of your life, like a dog with a collar around its neck.

   [Yes, I’ve been in a relationship with one man for seven years. It’s surprising, right?] 

   “Tell me straight, what is your weak point?”

   After the question from Jaehong over the phone and his serious inquiry, Jaeyoung burst into laughter for a while.

   [Weak point, huh… I’ve been caught red-handed.] 

   Then he went on to talk about other things. While Jaehong listened to his words, he realized that he had solved a mystery he had been wondering about.

   “Let’s meet and talk later, I’ll come find you.”

   [What about you?] 

   “Haven’t moved yet, right?”

   [Is it for real? I’ll be working until today. Starting tomorrow, I’ll have some time off. Not busy anymore.] 

   “Keep yourself available tomorrow afternoon.”

   [Fine, do whatever you want.] 

   As soon as they hung up, Jaehong bought a ticket immediately and now he’s flying to save the life of his stepbrother, as the woman laying next to him mentioned, because he doesn’t know what happened to Jang Jaeyoung’s brain that he will make the most evil and foolish decision ever made, without anyone else’s advice.

   First, he has to meet and analyze the situation realistically. What weak point has been caught? How wicked is the other person’s character, and how strong is the determination of the opposite side? What does he need to propose to make the other side stop and retreat? If that video or evidence is exposed, there will be some headaches, but Jaehong knows many lawyers who are capable enough to easily solve complicated problems.

   ‘I will help you myself, Jang Jaeyoung.’ 

   Jaehong was struggling with himself. The only other person he felt good with was his blood relative, the other part that would be linked to him until the day he died, and the friend who kept his secrets. As long as he could help that person, Jaehong would do everything.

   ________________________________________.

[1]      RP, “Received Pronunciation.” Standard accent in spoken English in Britain, characterized by a relatively clear articulation, commonly used in radio stations like the BBC. 

[2]      Cricket. It is a team sport played with 11 players per team, with one person designated as the bowler who throws the ball towards the three stumps placed on the field, called wickets. The team in batting is called the batsman, who tries to score runs by hitting the ball and running between the wickets until the fielders, who are the defending team, can retrieve the ball. 

[3]      Portfolio Manager = Investment Portfolio Manager. 

   *Syntax Error*, an error that occurs due to incorrect formatting or grammar of a programming language. 

    

    SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 14: Crash to Desktop. 

   Author: Mike R. Cornerman.

   [02-26 MON 19:34:28]

   Finally, the team has received a new employee. From now on, there will be a new person sitting next to me. I heard that he is a Korean who looks like a member of a boy band, K-pop. I wondered if he was a high school student, so I secretly asked Heather. I was surprised when the other person answered that he is 27 years old.

   [03-07 WED 16:22:19]

   The new coworker is polite and well-dressed, fashionable. Just as expected. He speaks a few words, according to the image. Heather asked for an easy report, but he wrote 11 pages. I saw that the woman next to him reacts positively, and it seems like he is a capable worker.

   [03-15 THU 11:05:34]

   I explained the related work, as requested by Mister Chu, and he listened until the end. After I finished, I told him to ask if he had any questions. He said that my talk seemed long and asked me to open the notepad to type. I haven’t met anyone who can use grammar perfectly without abbreviations or typos for months.

   [04-03 TUE 16:21:55]

   Luckily, there is a new employee who can communicate directly, and he is better than Louis who resigned.

   [04-11 WED 14:42:15]

   Mister Chu, his thinking is logical. It’s not that important, but sometimes I want to pinch his cheek.

   [04-20 FRI 18:25:08]

   I just found out that he is a game developer <Veggie Venturer> which was popular two to three years ago. When I told him that I really enjoy playing those games, he smiled at me for the first time.

   [04-24, TUE 11:12:45.]

   I tried searching on Google with the email ID of Chu’s company, but nothing came back. Then I tried searching on SNS, but it seems there is no activity. The account that I follow only has one graffiti artist.

   [05-04, FRI 10:52:29.]

   I just saw that he is wearing a ring on the ring finger of his left hand. Maybe it’s not because he already has a girlfriend.

   [05-06, SUN 14:41:30.]

   Let’s think about it. Chu’s ring looks exactly like a Rosary ring[1] my grandma, who passed away, used to wear a similar design. Is he a Roman Catholic too [2]? It doesn’t match him at all.

   [05-10, THU 13:57:06.]

   Jesse came to Chu’s table and kept saying that the shirt suits him well. Then she left, maybe she is interested in him

   [05-15, TUE 11:09:49.]

   God, Chu has understood that my name is “Michael” all along. We’ve been sitting next to each other for two months!

   [05-21. MON 13:56:11.]

   We had lunch together for the first time. Although the truth is that he was eating alone, I just happened to be sitting next to him.

   [05-24, THU 15:01:02.]

   The HR side gave Chu their business card. And he just started working, but he signed the card quickly. I asked for one of his business cards. Then he asked me what I would use it for. So, I made up a story about collecting business cards.

   [05-26, SAT 15:26:09.]

   I sent him a message on his mobile phone asking if he likes watching movies.

   Five hours later, I got a reply saying “I watched it before, there’s a story.” but the typos don’t seem to match with Chu typing style, the number written on the business card must be wrong, right?

   [06-08, FRI 14:22:06.]

   He has been wearing a black t-shirt and jeans for 2 weeks now. Is something bad happening or not?

   [06-11. MON 09:45:21.]

   May I request something? Chu! Just call me ‘Mike.’ Not ‘Michael,’ got it!

   [06-13, WED 17:41:10.]

   I saw Chu secretly making a video call in his native language in the temporary accommodation room. It felt more cute and entertaining than when he speaks English.

   Shall I try learning Korean sometime, shall I?

   [06-21, THU 12:57:26.]

   SANG-WOO… I wonder what his difficult-to-pronounce name means.

   [06-26, TUE 13:31:55.]

   Chu criticizes the inefficiency of my formatting code, which I quickly put together due to tight deadlines. I couldn’t argue with anything; it seems like Heather who walked by must have overheard everything.

   I never thought he would be the type to undermine others to make himself shine. I’ve been really disappointed that I tried to admire him, but from today onwards, we’re enemies.

   [06-27, WED 22:19:21.]

   I did overtime to find Chu’s mistakes, but couldn’t find any.

   [07-03, TUE 18:33:47.]

   Robot, try missing a bit.

   [07-12, THU 16:08:22.]

   While I was thinking about how to get revenge, I came up with a not-sonice nickname and secretly told Chris, the gossip king of our team. Soon, rumors will spread throughout the company.

   [07-13, FRI 18:32:11.]

   Achieved great success. Now, Chuis called ‘R-Chu-D-2’ instead. Go play in the sequel of Star Wars, you tin can!

   [07-16. MON 10:04:21.]

   The android sitting next to me is on vacation, the area is so quiet.

   [07-26, THU 17:29:56.]

   Is it normal for a company to be this boring?

   [07-30. MON 09:47:38.]

   R-Chu-D-2 came back… I have no idea where he went for my vacation, but he looks a little gloomy. Maybe I should try tanning too.

   [08-01, WED 13:47:32.]

   Mia Barren placed her hand on his shoulder and praised Chu. My heart was boiling, she was impressed with him.

   [08-02, THU 16:44:12.]

   He called me by the name ‘Michael’ for the third time. I pretended to be shocked. Then I went to protest to Heather that I couldn’t work with a stupid person who couldn’t even remember the names of the employees sitting next to him for half a year. If not, he would have to be fired. And then I was accused of being a crazy guy.

   [08-03, FRI 19:17:03.]

   While I was about to leave work, Chu came and apologized for what happened yesterday and said he would treat me to lunch next Sunday. Thank God. Now he called me by my name correctly.

   After returning home, my heart was still beating fast. Thank God.

   [08-06. MON 13:39:41.]

   Damn it! Damn it! Bastard! Why did we go for lunch with Midleton, Gregson, and Anderson, and why do I have to sit far away from him?

   Chu ate silently and when we started talking, he talked more and more, ignoring me completely. So I burst out saying, “Newbie like you, I can still beat you with my feet.” The atmosphere at that time… made me feel like I had become a fool.

   [08-10, FRI 09:51:36.]

   It seems like Chu is angry. He has been quiet and not talking for two to three days until we accidentally bumped into each other. Then he asked me if I have any experience in being a pro-gamer. I answered casually, but he kept insisting.

   [08-13. MON 16:14:28.]

   The man sitting next to me is annoying and irritating. He wonders why I’m good at playing games. I don’t really know if I should like or dislike his sarcasm.

   [08-16, THU 18:49:55.]

   I didn’t say anything excessive, but I can’t work properly because the Android robot is broken.

   [08-22, WED 23:36:12.]

   And then Heather came in, but instead of scolding him as the team leader, she jokingly said we should play a game to get to know each other. The situation turned into a funny one, and we made a bet to determine the winner and loser in a game. We have five more games scheduled within a week, and the team members are all excited and placing bets.

   I am currently practicing after work. I am very stressed.

   [08-27. MON 22:19:34.] Hard training.

   [08-28, TUE 23:57:03.]

   Damn, I can’t sleep. I think I’m going to win. Maybe….

   [08-29, WED 22:59:01.]

   Damn it. I forgot that the other person is Korean. The score is 4:1. And I lost. Even though I have been playing with my eyes closed since I was a child, I still end up losing so easily. I feel so ashamed. Not only to my teammates but also to people from other departments who came to watch.

   The final game which was <Minesweeper> ended with a blast from the first moment. I emerged as the champion.

   Now I’m drinking whiskey that Charlotte bought for me a year ago from Scotland. Cheers, Charlotte. [08-30, THU 11:01:23.] Sick leave.  [08-31, FRI 10:33:28.] Sick leave.

   [09-03. MON 09:44:39.]

   Heather helped me move my seat in the office to the farthest place from Chu.

   [09-04, TUE 14:23:56.]

   The new seat is nice and quiet. Even though it’s a bit annoying to have Jace and Middleton in sight.

   [09-06, THU 14:41:30.]

   This office is so spacious. It’s not a coincidence that we haven’t bumped into each other.

   [09-19, WED 13:44:01.]

   I always keep an eye on the time when he’s not at his desk and leaves his coffee behind. Damn, he caught me trying to do something sneaky with Middleton.

   It seems Chu misunderstood that I was trying to secretly kill him.

   [10-03, WED 15:01:22.]

   While smoking a cigarette with Walker, I heard a rumor that Tiffany Clarke was interested in Chu and even told him last year that she liked him.

   [10-04, THU 17:31:25.]

   I accidentally had coffee with Sally and she brought up the rumor. She said, ‘Chu is cute, but giving sweet looks to someone else’s man is a bitch move.’ Fuck, what are women’s eyes made of? So, she’s cute? Who is she talking about? And she’s someone else’s man? I don’t have any words.

   [10-16, TUE 14:05:51.]

   Damn, Sally keeps calling Chu, ‘the man with an owner’. We argued about his rights for a while. She even said it’s a Rosary Ring thing.

   [10-17, WED 11:04:55.]

   I confronted Sally to check the truth, and she confirmed that Chu has a lover.

   Damn, damn, damn, damn! I hate this world.

   And I lost $50 in bets too.

   [10-20, SAT 16:44:23.]

   After drinking continuously for 4 days, I started to feel like I was addicted to alcohol.

   [10-21, SUN 20:21:16.]

   It must be a lie that humans with cyborgs have lovers. That cold-hearted guy would never have a lover, no matter how you look at it, right?

   [10-22. MON 09:31:41.]

   I waited for Chu at the office entrance and asked him if he really had a lover. He handed me his phone without saying anything, and there was a picture of a male model that I didn’t know. I thought maybe he opened the wrong file, so I followed him with my eyes until he reached his desk. He told me to wait until tomorrow, he would bring clear evidence to show me.

   I hope tomorrow never comes.

   [10-23, TUE 09:59:12.]

   Damn it, he brought a picture of him kissing that guy from yesterday. My heart sank to my stomach, but I couldn’t help but admire his impressive editing skills.

   [10-24, WED 10:16:48.]

   The person who proudly claimed to be his lover sent a huge flower basket that couldn’t pass through the door to the office. Everyone went out to see and took pictures with that flower basket. The first person to take a selfie with it was, of course, Heather, who should be questioned about why she came to such a prestigious workplace.

   Lovers, clearly playing a drama.

   [10-25, THU 09:01:05.]

   I’m focusing on my work attentively.

   [10-26, FRI 11:17:37.]

   I don’t miss Chu at all.

   [10-30, TUE 17:24:01.]

   There is a rumor that the new female programmer is all over Chu, what nonsense! Walkeger, stop asking me useless questions!

   [11-05. MON 13:45:52.]

   1, What have you done in the past year?

   [11-09, FRI 23:17:08.]  Suddenly, I miss you.

   [11-11, SUN 02:14:46.]

   The end-of-year party is coming up. I want to give him a gift, as he has been working hard this year. I just want to show my gratitude as a team member. I have no other intention.

   [11-22, THU 19:41:29.]

   What can I give as a good friendship gift? A bouquet of flowers? A necklace?

   A ring?

   [12-06, THU 22:45:18.]

   The perfume that I ordered has arrived. When I tried tapping the bottle with my nose, it had a cool and refreshing scent that I think would suit them. I’ve been practicing what to say to them when giving the gift in front of the mirror every day, but I feel like I’m trembling and on the verge of death.

   [12-11, TUE 20:38:12.]

   Year-end party, D-5, I’ll go buy a new suit and necktie after work.

   [12-12, WED 21:47:15.]

   Year-end party, D-4. I have indigestion and insomnia.

   [12-13, THU 23:48:51.]

   Year-end party, D-1, Anyone can come and kill me.

   [12-14, FRI 23:15:24.]

   That person who claimed to be the love of Chu, came to the party. When he saw the other party, Chu, they ran over and hugged him, burying his face on their chest immediately. It was the first time I saw such an awkward Android figure and it made me feel embarrassed.

   It seems that the other party is a good graphic designer but lacks substance. I think they might be an actor paid more by Chu. While holding hands and introducing themselves, he leaned towards Chu, as if truly in love. I was impressed by their good acting, but I don’t know why I squeezed my hand so tightly that it hurt a little.

   I admit that he is handsome and articulate, but I don’t understand why I am jealous. Does he really have to deal with all these over-enthusiastic female employees, handsome men, smart suits, melodious voices, fun-loving, playful, and so on…

   I spend my time at parties mindlessly drinking various alcoholic beverages in one corner. I can’t even grab a gift properly. I don’t have the courage to give it directly to him, so I go to the parking lot, thinking of putting the perfume on his car, Chu. And then I go home, but then… I see a picture of him kissing the partner leaning against the car.

   Chu, who is unbuttoning his shirt with great enthusiasm and talking in a low, coarse voice that I have never heard before. I stubbornly float as I watch the shaking car after they both go inside before leaving the parking lot.

   I hope there’s a taxi somewhere to pick me up.

   [12-22, SAT 17:42:39.]

   I’m taking a break, from now on I won’t think about him for real.

   [12-23, SUN 10:10:08.]

   Still taking a break. Now I have to stop drinking alcohol.

   [12-25, TUE 19:35:10.]

   Still taking a break, suddenly I wondered if Korean culture celebrates Christmas too, so I sent a message to the only Korean person I know.

   I just asked a sincere question, but received a scolding as a response, in both uppercase letters and without spaces.

   [12-27, THU 02:41:26.]

   The actor whom Chu hired just to take video calls to threaten me neverended.

   After the break ended. I guess I have to change my number.

   ________________________________________.

[1]      Prayer ring, “rosary, ring : 목주반지.” A ring used for reciting the rosary in Roman Catholicism. In addition to the ring, there is also a long rosary necklace and a wrist rosary. 

[2]      Christian, a term used to refer to Christians, Roman Catholicism. 

[3]      R-CHU-D-2, derived from the name R2-D2, which is a robot in the Star Wars series. 

   *Crash, to, Desktop*, occurs when a program, “especially games,” abruptly stops working and exits to the desktop immediately. This term is typically used for sudden malfunctions that do not display an error message. 

    

   SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 13: Hello World! #4. 

“He looks handsome, don’t you think so mom?”

“I don’t really know, but compared to your father in his younger days…”

“It’s not like that. Mother, you have lost all sense of moderation. You are feeling the side effects of love again.”

Jaeyoung restrained his laughter, moved closer to the door, and leaned against it to eavesdrop.

“By the way, did you get a health check before having sex?”

“No, but I always use protection.”

“Then it’s safe.”

“To be honest, I often have desires and find pleasure in having sex in everyday life too much. Sometimes I feel like I’ve lost my humanity. Even just exchanging glances can stimulate my sexual desire. If he had any dangerous infections, it would have spread since before now and caused problems.”

“In a way, you have a part that resembles your father.”

“A fallen tree doesn’t fall far from its trunk.”

“Son, before I started having a relationship with your father, we had to get tested for various diseases beforehand. You should also get tested.”

“I understand. It seems like I am being careless. I will book a hospital appointment tomorrow.”

Listening to both of them talk about everything, Jaeyoung knows that if he is caught eavesdropping, he will feel embarrassed. But he wants to know and care about what they are talking about, so he doesn’t move away.

“You look happy, son.”

I am happy.”

“What is so happy about it?”

“After we started dating, life has become more meaningful. I want to get married soon because it is a version that increases stability. Even if I wear a ring, I am still not at ease and I think I should emphasize legally that he is my spouse to be able to trust him.”

“Feeling like that is normal, everyone loves stability.”

“Right now, I can’t understand how I can be so patient even for just one day when he is just a guy.”

Today, Sangwoo speaks and negotiates very skillfully. Jaeyoung stands against the wall, listens to the other party’s voice, and smiles silently without blinking.

“How do you divide household chores?”

“I do the laundry and clean the living room, while he is responsible for everything in the kitchen. But I hate it when he leaves scraps of food, so I end up eating them for him.”

“Does he suffer from an eating disorder?”

“No, it’s more like an annoyance.”

“I see. Sanghee is also the same.”

“There’s no comparison, really. That strange creature must be the first human to have such a twisted leg, while he…there are times when he’s just a little lazy, but that’s rare. When he comes back from work, he might be tired.”

The tone of his reserved voice sounds sweet. Jaeyoung hopes that the peanut shells covering the other person’s eyes will not come off.

“Last month, Sanghee also brought his boyfriend. They plan to get married next year.”

“I know. I’ve always wondered if that person knows my sister’s true nature or not.”

“It may be surprising, but I think it’s because she is with her partner that they don’t reveal any flaws in their daily life.”

“It’s deception. They will probably break up after they get married.”

“What about you? Isn’t there a problem with that?”

“I don’t know, man. Sometimes I just want to know how it feels, like Hyung  Jaeyoung, so I took off my socks and left them lying there for about six hours.

After that, I felt regretful.”

‘…Is that so?’ 

“Son, sometimes I try to impress your dad by buying literature books. Even if

I don’t read them.”

“I understand. I’ve been skateboarding every weekend too.”

“How is it?”

“Wait a minute. Let me open it and show you.”

The room fell silent for a moment. Then, the sound of water that I had heard somewhere before became louder.

[Take a good look… Sangwoo-ya, just step on the tail[1], right? And don’t touch the ground. If you miss, you could flip over and break your head.] 

[Where should I press?] 

[The sole of your foot. It’s hard to explain in words. You have to use your shoulder to maintain balance. Let me show you again. Slide like this… Try it, try doing it and it’s faster.] 

[Wait. I’m recording a video.] 

The sound of the skateboard scraping against the floor, and the video was cut off. Chu Sangwoo, who wanted to show off to his own parents, really went all out and was an excellent skater.

“Why do you have to do something like this?”

The mother of the person in question remained silent for a moment before speaking up.

“I think I like it. It gives me a more exhilarating feeling than running.”

“You don’t use this to travel, right?”

“Yes. It doesn’t have an engine, so it’s not considered an efficient way to travel. But it’s a lot of fun. Last Sunday, I overshot a bit and fell over while plowing. I bruised myself a little but I am all okay now.”

“Be careful.”

“And I have to go on a trip once a season and watch a movie once a week.”

“Sounds too bothersome.”

“It’s a way to update. I don’t think it’s cool or anything.”

“He’s bigger than you. Probably won’t hurt you, right?”

“Don’t worry.”

“Okay, let’s go then.”

“Any other questions?”

“No, that’s all.”

“Then let’s go up.”

“See you later, let’s talk again. When I talk to you, this mother of yours feels better.”

“I understand. Then tell me about the research you’ve been doing lately.”

‘Should I call him a filial son?’ 

Jaeyoung laughed and backed away, being extra careful not to make the old staircase make squeaky noises.

Sangwoo had spoken correctly. The parents tried to understand and respect their son’s decision. They didn’t care about Jaeyoung being a man; his father’s attention was focused solely on his son’s feelings, while his mother cared about their son’s well-being. Sometimes, regardless of whether the person who

Sangwoo brought there was a man or an extraterrestrial, they both reacted similarly.

‘I feel a bit sad too.’ 

Jaeyoung immersed himself in happiness and smiled. On the second floor, there were two bathrooms and two bedrooms. There were traces of stickers on the door of the first room that had been pulled off before, but at least he was confident that it wasn’t Sangwoo’s room. Upon closer inspection, he found that there were purple writings written with a marker.

[Sang-Hee’s room~☆★, No! One! Allowed! at all. 

Especially Chu Sangwoo.] 

Next to the name Sangwoo, there was a drawing that resembled a cloud, sometimes it could be a piece of lettuce[2]. Jaeyoung walked forward and stopped in front of the door to the clean and neat room, his heart pounding uncontrollably for no reason, so he took a deep breath to calm himself and opened the door. After feeling the wall to turn on the light, he smiled immediately.

“This is… Chu Sangwoo’s museum.”

Jaeyoung lifted his face and examined every corner of the small room.

One wall was filled with bookshelves packed with science books for children. When he took one out to look at it, he found a worn-out cover that said everything was old. Especially the ones that were so old they were like dust, and on the wall there was a map of stars and constellations with over a hundred different dinosaur names. Although it was laminated, the edges were already worn out.

The brown table that Sangwoo used to sit and read high school books was covered with glass, and on it were clay models and movable solar system models. On the bookshelf were math exercise books and several notebooks, and the top shelf had a helicopter, a battleship, a satellite model, and around twenty CDs.

“This has been a long time.”

Jaeyoung opened a few CDs, reminiscing about the past. Then he discovered something and smiled happily.

He carefully picked up the most valuable artifact that would most likely be in the museum if Chu Sangwoo’s museum actually existed. If Jaeyoung guessed correctly, it would be a model that the stubborn boy’s father bought when he was twelve, Chu Sangwoo’s first love. It was a toy that turned white because the yellow color on it almost peeled off, a ‘Crawler’[3]. Jaeyoung carefully examined the mini excavator that was smaller than his hand before placing it down.

His gaze shifted to the small bed and he quickly glanced over the clean white sheet prepared by Sangwoo’s parents that was placed on the black space under the bed. It was often a secret hiding place for the young boy. Jaeyoung didn’t believe that Sangwoo would keep pornographic pictures, “Even if the young man still looks at porn, he would probably back them up as digital files rather than keeping physical items.” But he still bent down to look under the bed with curiosity.

When he saw that there was a plastic box under the bed, he picked it up and found that it was filled with toys – marbles, mini cars, water bottle rockets, action figures, model ambulances, Rubik’s cubes, wooden blocks, glass marbles, and a ddakji [4]… Another box was a colorful Lego set, next to a stack of old science magazines tied with a rope.

There was only that spot that seemed frozen in time, as if it held important belongings for its owner. Sangwoo would keep them well-preserved. He didn’t throw away anything, everything, old and worn-out items included, but even so, they remained in a meaningful state.

‘Every time he comes here, he feels like it’s home.’ 

Jaeyoung moved places frequently, so all the things he used as a child had disappeared. The only place that felt like home to him now was the officetel where he lived with Sangwoo. Sometimes it might be the dream of a wandering vagabond to have a stable life. Jaeyoung could feel the overwhelming emotions as he was surrounded by the past that had created Sangwoo’s present.

‘Your world, your starting point, everything that led you to be by my side.’ 

Jaeyoung stood in the place where Sangwoo grew up, slowly getting acquainted with the world of an honest and curious young boy, and capturing those moments with his eyes. He imagined what it would be like if Sangwoo’s love never changed, how long his love and devotion would last. He wished to be one of the things that Sangwoo liked, and hoped that his own traces would remain within Sangwoo, no matter how many years passed, like the fingerprints embedded in those science books.

Jaeyoung neatly arranged everything under the bed and stood up before discovering Sangwoo’s graduation photo album on the bookshelf. He lay down on the bed, looking at the unfamiliar face and waiting for Sangwoo to appear.

The picture of Chu Sangwoo during his elementary school years looked just as expected. It wasn’t very interesting, a young boy with short hair and an expressionless face. Although he had fair and dry skin, it was a characteristic that was not commonly seen, even during his high school years. He could feel that only time had passed, while that face remained surprisingly unchanged.

‘If we met in high school, there’s no way we could get close.’ 

Jaeyoung pondered as he looked at the group photo from Sangwoo’s high school years. On the other hand, he was a bookworm, the undisputed top student in the school, which was a strange thing. While he was a struggling student controlled within the school, Jaeyoung suddenly felt that the fact that people like them were connected was like a miracle.

If Jaeyoung did not attend university as a talented student in the arts, he would probably die because of his grades, and even if he recovers, he probably would not be able to attend Hankuk University. If he did not postpone his training with Heng Sooyi until the last semester, he would not have met with Sangwoo again. If he participated in group work and contributed appropriately and created a good PowerPoint presentation in that semester, Sangwoo probably would not remember Jang Jaeyoung forever. And if Han Sooyeong did not give Jaeyoung the “Vegetable Man” project, he would have graduated without knowing the truth about Chu Sangwoo, the leader of the group, being a crazy guy.

He increased his grip on the photo album. Several random events happened overlapping each other, and Sangwoo ended up beside Jaeyoung. What would happen if he had not met the other party? 

While Jaeyoung was dancing in imagination, the door suddenly opened. When he saw the man walking through the door, he immediately got up from the bed and realized that he was hugging Sangwoo tightly. 

“…Are you crying?”

“No, is there something in my eye?”

“This room is not used and it’s dusty, right?”

Jaeyoung laughed softly, his back touching Sangwoo’s chest and his chin resting on his shoulder. He used to think his heart was full of love for this man, and he thought it couldn’t get any higher because he had reached the highest point, but that was a misconception. As the days and nights went by, he fell more in love with Chu Sangwoo. Jaeyoung loved Sangwoo more today than he did yesterday.

“Sangwooya.”

“Yes, what is it?”

“How much do you like me?”

“…”

Jaeyoung released his small hug and used his hand to lift Sangwoo’s chin, their eyes met for just a moment, and his gaze was filled with warmth. Who said the other party was a dust-sucking robot? What gentle vacuum cleaner exists in the world? Jaeyoung smiled softly at the other party.

“Answer quickly.”

“… It cannot be measured quantitatively.”

“Do you like it more than an excavator?”

“That point has been missing for a long time.”

‘Have you heard, you scrap metal!’

Jaeyoung announced victory over the paint-stripped toy.

“Hyung.”

“What?”

“I want to kiss you.”

“What will you do if your dad and mom come in while we’re kissing?”

“If I say not to come in, no one will come in.”

Jaeyoung looked down and caught Sangwoo’s still gaze. Sangwoo frowned as he saw him fidgeting.

“Sangwoo, the excavator and helicopter are watching.”  “They should know by now that I am an adult.” Sangwoo spoke calmly.

“When will you let me play with the toys?”

Jaeyoung burst into laughter, but in the next second, Sangwoo tiptoed to cover his mouth, so he couldn’t laugh anymore. 

________________________________________.

[1]                      tail = the back part of a skateboard, nose = the front part of a skateboard. 

[2]                      Sawtooth lettuce, derived from Sangwoo’s nickname, which means 

“Sawtooth lettuce.” 

[3]                      Crawler = caterpillar track, but if it’s a regular wheel. 

[4]                      Dut Ji, “ddakji.” A toy made by folding paper into a rectangular shape, or by placing letters or images on thick paper. 

  

    SMNTCERR CHAPTERS HOME

SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 12: Hello world! #3. 

“Working together and being together made us closer.”

“The more I think about it, the more surprising it becomes. We both speak in a similar embarrassed way, but until recently, I misunderstood the mother of that child. Why, I mean… Are there people who date men and women at the same time?”

What should come, came. Jaeyoung thought, Sangwoo’s father looked at his face before speaking again and again with an embarrassed expression.

“I shouldn’t say anything. When you’re older, you just keep doing things like this.”

The other party quickly drank all the alcohol and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Then he took a cigarette out of his pocket and lit it.

“May I have one please?”

The middle-aged man looked surprised, but immediately handed the cigarette and lighter, it was a brand with a stronger taste than the one Jaeyoung normally smoked, he turned his body to light it. Then there was a heavy silence for a moment. While Jaeyoung’s cigarette flickered halfway, Sangwoo’s father burst out.

“It’s you. Sangwoo will be going abroad. I think you will miss each other, you’ve been together for a year.”

Jaeyoung felt that the time had finally come. He took a deep puff of his cigarette and exhaled a long breath.

“Sir.”

He put strength into his words so that the other party wouldn’t misunderstand. Then the kind and gentle eyes of the couple looked over.

“I’m going to quit my job and go back to school. It’s a university not far from

Sangwoo’s workplace, so we’ll live together up there.”

He never thought that one person could apply to the same university three times. Jaeyoung hesitated between moving to work at a branding company and pursuing a master’s degree, and finally chose the latter. He wanted to work on his own to test and develop his own design style more than this. Even if he didn’t want to work part-time.

Sangwoo’s father’s mouth was open, the cigarette fell to the ground, but Jaeyoung quickly picked it up and threw it in the ashtray before the fire could spread to the grass. When he locked eyes with the other party again, he found that those eyes looked so complex that he couldn’t know what hidden meaning they held. Jaeyoung couldn’t judge whether the person in front of him was angry, disappointed, or hopeless.

‘Do I have to kneel?’ 

He pondered in his heart, feeling the difficulty of making a decision. While the other party replied in silence, time passed. Jaeyoung continued to look into the eyes of the middle-aged man, his mouth slightly open.

“I’ve prepared myself to face you sir, so please listen until the end.”

The other party’s eyes just widened, with no gesture of obstruction. Jaeyoung thought of Sangwoo, who was talking to his mother in a similar manner, and felt a surge of courage.

“Me and your father’s son are not just friends. We have been in a serious relationship and have been living together since July last year. The state we are going to has legalized same-sex marriage, so we plan to request the right to live together permanently and marry in the future. I’m not sure and probably you will not allow it, but I decided to reveal this deep relationship as a secret because I felt it was inappropriate.”

Jaeyoung didn’t think of acting as a protagonist in a soap opera in the morning, but his body automatically knelt to the ground. Jaeyoung was surprised by his own actions. At the same time, he felt extremely tense as he realized that he was proposing the most suitable posture towards the opposing party.

“Hey, what are you doing?”

Sangwoo’s father quickly stood up from his chair and pulled Jaeyoung up by the arm, his grip exceeding his age. Jaeyoung got up and sat back on the chair.

Then, between them, they were surrounded by a long silence.

Not knowing how long time had passed, Sangwoo’s father picked up a cigarette and lit it with a shock of fire. Then he handed the cigarette box to  Jaeyoung…without looking at him, he extended both hands and took one roll.  This time, the other party lit it by himself. Jaeyoung brought the cigarette close to the other party with a strange feeling and soon the fire was lit. Jaeyoung took a deep breath.

The silent poet remained silent until there was only a cigarette butt left. In the meantime, Jaeyoung forgot about the tension. Once he spoke, he felt relieved and believed that he couldn’t do anything more from now on. However, Jaeyoung didn’t think of giving up just because the parents of the other party objected. So no matter what reaction he received, he had to persevere.

“Will it be okay?”

However, the reaction from Sangwoo’s father was beyond expectation. The other party had a calm and serene demeanor, no sign of anger or resentment, and the ambiguous words were difficult to understand. Jaeyoung could only respond with a clueless feeling.

“Sir you mean…”

“On the outside, it may not seem like it, but Sangwoo is very possessive.”

The middle-aged man looked into Jaeyoung’s eyes. Jaeyoung saw the concern in those eyes, which had lines around them.

“The toy he bought at the age of three. Even though it’s broken, he still fixes it, fixes it, fixes it, and keeps it. The logo he bought at the age of five is still the same, without any missing parts. Not to mention his pickup truck.

“…He is like that.”

“He is a child who, if he sets his mind on something, will possess it. No matter what happens, he will still possess it, never let it go. You have to think carefully. You may have a chance to escape only now.”

Jaeyoung hesitated, feeling like he was being cornered.

“Does sir not care that I am a man?” The middle-aged man smiled wryly.

“You said that you and him love each other.”

“Yes.”

“Does Sangwoo think the same way?”

“Same way? Yes. Of course.”

“Are you sure? I mean, have you actually heard it directly from that kid’s mouth?”

The other side fell silent for a moment, their face blushing.

 

 

I don’t really know what Sangwoo is thinking to be able to date you. It might shake you, but I have to be honest with you.”

The other side took a breath and looked up, glaring at Jaeyoung.

“Sangwoo, he understands physical desires, but he doesn’t understand love.”

The father knew his son well enough. Jaeyoung was overwhelmed with mixed emotions when he thought about the night he had cried before meeting Sangwoo. The other side looked at Jaeyoung’s face and added.

“I’m not joking, you know?”

“Okay.”

“It may sound strange. That kid has had a good head on his shoulders since he was young, but his emotional development has been slow…joy, happiness, and the desire for a meaningful relationship. As a father, I’ve been trying to teach him all along, but I’ve failed miserably too. When he turned twenty-one, I heard that he was seriously dating a girl from the same university. I was so relieved that he would finally live a life as a human being…” He sighed.

“He said it was an experiment to test if the other person was suitable for marriage. Even though I strongly disagreed, he couldn’t understand what he did wrong. I didn’t know what to say, she’s just a young girl…”

She was an older female student, two years older than Sangwoo. They happened to meet when they were working on a special project for the university’s secretary. Jaeyoung tried everything to find out who she was, but Sangwoo refused to reveal her name because it was personal information. It became an ongoing mystery for Jaeyoung.

“He’s a kid who understands that love between parents is a genetic behavior for reproductive purposes. Even though we demonstrated our love and gave each other more love than necessary, he only understands it in that way…” Even though Jaeyoung wondered how he ended up having to comfort Sangwoo’s father, he poured himself a drink without realizing.

“So, Sangwoo is very responsible.”

“Where is his responsibility of returning the money invested in raising him until now? We’re not a bank.”

“…”

Even though he’s my son, he lacks a lot of humanity. It’s all my fault… I’ve raised him wrong.”

Seeing the other side hold their head with both hands, Jaeyoung smiled from the bottom of his heart. He himself had thought something similar, but now many things have changed. 

“Don’t talk like that at all. I can clearly see in my own eyes how much

Sangwoo loves this house and respects you.”

“You’re really good at making jokes about Sangwoo.”

“No, I’m serious. Sangwoo is a child who has clearly been raised with love. Originally, his personality may have been easygoing and sincere, but I think that’s because he has been heavily influenced by you two,  his parents.”

“Easygoing…and sincere? Sangwoo?”

“Sangwoo has changed a lot. He expresses love frequently and hugs passionately. Whatever other people do, he does it all. When I asked him to marry me, he accepted and handed me a bouquet of flowers, promising to make me happy. I couldn’t refuse.”

Sangwoo’s father couldn’t believe it. Jaeyoung picked up his phone and showed him the screenshot of a message he had saved.

[Chu Sangwoo♡♡: I love you♥ _11 one month ago.] 

“…This means he did it, right?”

The middle-aged man’s mouth was agape with shock. In reality, it was something he made someone else do, but Jaeyoung was determined not to reveal it.

“Even though it’s something he’s forced to do every parent’s day[1], he refuses to use words that are filled with true emotions.”

Sangwoo’s father frowned in pain. This wasn’t the right time to feel superior, but Jaeyoung always had to pull the corners of his mouth, which had the tendency to lift, back down.

“Sangwoo is someone who is honest with his feelings. It’s just that he’s not comfortable with showing them. He expresses happiness when he’s happy and sadness when he’s sad.”

The boasting words just kept coming out of his mouth. Jaeyoung only hoped that his words didn’t sound like bragging, but even so, he thought he deserved the Nobel Peace Prize for this year.

And because he has a logical mindset, as long as we understand each other, there won’t be any arguments. There may be things to be sad about, but I have to make things better.”

Sangwoo’s father stared blankly, as if his soul had left him, ever since he saw the message.

“A half year of dating may seem like a short period of time. I try to be cautious about speaking like this, but…”

Jaeyoung’s confidence was filled with determination, contradicting his humble words. Getting to know each other took more than a year for him, it was not a short time at all. It was enough for him to decide to bet his life on it. 

“No one else has been like Sangwoo in my entire life. I truly love your son.”

He didn’t plan to speak words so repetitive like this, but almost nothing in Jaeyoung’s life went according to plan anymore. Even though it may change as he continues to live with Chu Sangwoo.

“I feel uncomfortable and guilty about being a man, but if I have your permission, I think I will confidently pursue a relationship with Sangwoo.”

Jaeyoung spoke with confidence, the uneasiness and fear he used to feel vanished without him realizing it.

After a moment of silence, Sangwoo’s father, with his head down, looked at the floor and took a breath before responding.

“If it’s what Sangwoo wants, does it really matter if I permit it or not?”

The answer was ambiguous, but at this point, it was considered good news.

Jaeyoung had prepared himself for this moment.

“You should try talking to his mother. I don’t have any authority in this house…”

The image of the family head, with a drooping neck, looked pitiful.

“Will his mother strongly oppose it?”

“Instead of opposing… Sometimes she may not understand, she might say something like ‘why does neon have two electrons in a noble gas configuration’.” “I see…”

Jaeyoung felt that he was right to rely on Sangwoo to handle his mother.

The suffocating silence continued for a moment.

“Jaeyoung.”

“Yes.”

Thank you for talking to me directly, but now my head is a mess. If you don’t have anything else to say to me, I would like to be alone for a while.”

The poet stood up and walked away from his seat. Just as he was about to say goodbye, he suddenly became curious.

“Well, before I go, may I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“How did you meet?”

The middle-aged man laughed and looked at Jaeyoung before answering.

“It was during the time I was working in Seoul… On the bus I took, there was a woman who got on at the same time and sat in the same seat every day. She was a beautiful and interesting woman.”

“Oh…”

“I wrote poems for her every month, but after a year, there was no response…

Until one day, she got on the bus and told me that my grammar was incorrect.”

“…”

“I’m a poet who writes sincere love poems, but the story is not romantic, right?”

It wouldn’t be right to say that the other party just said that. Jaeyoung covered his mouth with a hand to suppress his laughter.

As he walked into the house with laughter echoing softly in the background, the beautiful moonlight shone brightly. Jaeyoung immersed himself in this moment and missed Sangwoo greatly.

As he turned the doorknob, the large door opened gently. Jaeyoung entered the clean and tidy entrance hall, picked up the slippers labeled “Guest 1” to wear, and placed his own dress shoes accordingly.

The house was dim and cozy. Light seeped out from the partially open door in the hallway. As he walked past the room where the door was slightly ajar to go upstairs, he heard a conversation between a mother and her son.

“What’s next? How did you get him?”

“After a sudden proposal, I got him a ring.”

“Very smart. That’s the best way to hold a mate in every era.”

“He’s someone who doesn’t fuss about tiny details, so he probably doesn’t care much about wearing any accessories. That’s why I feel a bit guilty about him wearing the ring.”

Your father is the same. He didn’t think we would be together for a lifetime, only thinking about having fun and being happy.”

Jaeyoung smiled awkwardly and couldn’t speak. When he reached into his pants pocket, he touched a thin ring that he had removed for several hours.

Jaeyoung took it out and put it on his fourth finger.

________________________________________.

[1] Parents’ Day, “어버이날, : Observe enju.” It falls on May 8th and is a day designated to express gratitude for the kindness and love of parents, by giving them red carnations. 

 

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SMNTCERR, Special Chapter 11: Hello world! #2. 

   Jaeyoung sat there in a daze. Then he noticed various picture frames hanging on the wall. Jaeyoung stood up and examined the family photos and sibling pictures playing together in detail, in order.

   ‘Wow, you have a beautiful sister.’

   He was meditating, looking at the phone screen. While  a close zooming of the boy holding a toy. Sangwoo came down from the second floor.

   “How can you leave me alone?”

   Jaeyoung said without uttering a word, but Sangwoo sat on the sofa with an indifferent expression.

   They sat silently for a moment. Sangwoo looked comfortable as if he was at his own home, while Jaeyoung fidgeted and finally, after some hesitation, went to offer help in preparing food. But then he was told by the father that it wasn’t the guest’s responsibility, accompanied by the gaze of the mother seemingly asking why he was interfering, and was chased out.

   Dinner started at six o’clock sharp. Each person had a plastic coaster placed under their dish, topped with a soup bowl, a rice bowl, and a personal plate. A water glass was placed on a coaster, while a small spoon and fork were placed on a small coaster made of white glazed tiles. Everything was neatly arranged in its rightful place without anything out of order or inconsistent with usage.

   “Come home often. Eat a lot..Sangwoo-ya.”

   “Yes.”

   “Jaeyoung too, although there isn’t much prepared, please eat a lot.”

   “Yes. I will eat until I’m satisfied.”

   Seaweed soup, sangseojeon [1], bulgogi [2], and two or three side dishes. Although not excessive to fill the table, it was evident that they put effort into it as their son came back. However, the atmosphere during dinner, with no conversation even for a single word, made it difficult for him to breathe. It seemed that this house had been like this from the beginning, as besides Jaeyoung, no one seemed bothered.

   Jaeyoung ate without realizing whether he scooped it into his mouth or into his nose. While in the midst of eating, suddenly, Sangwoo’s father spoke up.

   “Did you finish university? How was it?”

   “Yes. If you’re wondering about my grades, last semester, I got A+ for every subject, even though I read fewer books because I had to prepare for finding a job, but I’m still doing fine.”

   His father probably didn’t intend to ask about that matter, but Jaeyoung was determined to talk about his grades. Sangwoo was good at speaking when facing his parents. Although the important points may not match, sometimes if it were someone else asking, it might have ended with just a ‘yes.’ 

   “So, is anything good happening? Except for the work stuff that I already know.”

   “I can’t say.”

   The other father chooses to change the question instead of pushing further.

   “Do you have friends?”

   “No.”

   Sangwoo scooped up some seaweed soup and continued speaking.

   “I’ve been saying it all along. I don’t need friends.”

   “Quit talking about Black Mamba already.”

   Jaeyoung barely managed to hold in his laughter, almost spitting out the rice, pretending that he had something stuck in his throat as he drank water.

   At that moment, Sangwoo’s mother interjects.

   “It’s your right to say whatever, but please respect the right to express opinions. Please, dear.”

   “We didn’t give birth to a snake, but you keep talking about snakes. Not just once or twice.”

   “The right words should be spoken not just once in a while, learning from nature is an attitude to be admired.”

   Almost as if hearing a loud sound, ‘clang clang,’ Sangwoo’s deep-rooted confidence is nurtured by this method, yet his father is still unwilling to back down.

   “Every person needs to be part of society, you’re not an exception. Look, even our son and the friend sitting next to you did well coming out, right?”

   “Yes, and this person is my sunbae, not just a friend.”

   “Even if there’s a difference in age, people can still be friends, age doesn’t matter for friendships.”

   “I didn’t mean it that way, he’s not a friend, but he’s…”

   Jaeyoung firmly holds onto Sangwoo’s knee under the table, silencing him before he says something pointless.

   “I am his sunbae. We are colleagues who work together. He probably doesn’t like being called a friend.”

   “Oh, really? Anyway, forget it. Sangwoo is weak with this word’s definition.”

   ‘Even though things may go differently from what was expected, it’s not too bad.’ 

   Jaeyoung pondered, if his son brought the man he was living with home. He seemed suspicious, but the parents of the other party didn’t pay much attention, causing Jaeyoung to be startled. However, despite that, he couldn’t continue living like this as if he were a shadow. Jaeyoung observed the delicate atmosphere.

   “Why did you bring him here?”

   While chewing his food, Jaeyoung suddenly forgot how to move his mouth. Sangwoo’s mother, who had been sitting quietly as if nothing had happened, suddenly intervened with a blink of an eye. “He…”  Jaeyoung clenched his knees tighter.

   “He’s my close sunbae. I wanted to introduce him to you Mom.”

   Sangwoo didn’t forget Jaeyoung’s explanation. Although he thought he had handled it well, the mother of the other party didn’t seem pleased.

   “A sunbae? Don’t you have seniors who are women?”

   The tone was soft, but there was an unbearable pressure. Jaeyoung unintentionally held his breath without realizing it, but Sangwoo replied calmly.

   “In Korean society, there is a tradition of addressing older people as ‘sunbae’ even if they don’t have a blood relationship. Although they might not have a blood relationship, they still feel close.”

   “I know, but we have to accept the possibility of confusion with the term.”

   “When closeness is more important than discomfort, we have to address each other in that way.”

   “I understand.”

   Jaeyoung quickly exhaled the breath he had held. Even though he felt relieved, the crisis happened and ended abruptly, so he couldn’t comprehend the direction of the conversation. Internally, he felt suffocated and seemed to have indigestion.

   After finishing their meal, Sangwoo’s father took the peeler that Jaeyoung had bought and peeled two fruits. The quick and smooth peeling technique was not something that could be achieved in just two attempts. Sangwoo’s mother ate a couple of pieces of fruit and quietly went into her room.

   Jaeyoung helped move the empty plates to the kitchen and offered to help wash them, but he was ushered out. Once the kitchen door closed, he had the chance to have a one-on-one conversation with Sangwoo.

   “Why do you make that face?”

   “Why, what’s wrong with my face?”

   “It looks like you’ve had botox.”

   Jaeyoung burst out laughing and sat down on the sofa, keeping a safe distance from Sangwoo, afraid that the other party’s parents might notice. But after a while, he slowly moved closer and rested his head on Sangwoo’s shoulder. As he buried his nose in Sangwoo’s neck and took a deep breath, he heard a louder mocking laughter.

   “You’re a brave one, huh? Always observing every detail when we eat.”

   “….”

   “Who said anything about hitting you? Why are you so scared?”

   “Those are your parents, you know. It must be difficult.”

   Jaeyoung closed his eyes and leaned fully on Sangwoo. Then Sangwoo embraced him.

   “If I ever meet your grandfather, should I bow to him?”

   “Don’t even think about meeting him.”

   “Why?”

   “You’ll get hurt.”

   “He’s over seventy. I don’t think I’ll get pushed around just because of someone’s age.”

   Jaeyoung laughed at Sangwoo’s playful words, but deep down he knew it wasn’t a joke and a sense of unease crept up. He had never heard before that Sangwoo respected and revered the elderly. Jaeyoung made up his mind that the two should never meet under any circumstances.

   “I feel touché when I hear what you say.”

   Jaeyoung looked away again after inspecting the surroundings and finding no one who would smell Sangwoo’s cheeks before sitting back away from the other party.

   “Let’s strategize.”

   “What strategy?”

   “I am not confident to talk to your mother, so I will leave her to you. As for me, I will talk to your father.”

   “Is this a game?”

   “Well, the goal is to talk about our relationship without getting caught or cut off. Do you think we can do it?”

   “Not right now.”

   Jaeyoung grabbed Sangwoo, who was about to get up, and pulled him back down to sit again.

   “You are a son that your parents can be proud of, raised well for sixteen years. You bringing a boyfriend home instead of a girlfriend means something, don’t you know? They will be shocked for sure. They might even tell you to break up with me or, worst case scenario, they might cut off your relationship with the family. Are you prepared for that?”

   “No.”

   Sangwoo’s face became confused and silent for a moment.

   “I don’t quite understand. It’s my choice who I date.”

   “In principle, that’s true, but…”

   “My parents taught me that choices come with responsibilities. They said that when I became an adult. I have to take responsibility for my own choices, and even if something goes wrong, no one can solve the problem for me.” The other party’s eyes suddenly sparkled with confidence.

   “In the sixteen years that I have known my parents, they have never done anything that contradicts their words. If they go against what you said about my relationship, it wouldn’t make sense.”

   The keyboard that types correct words, a general who tries to solve all the problems with a sword called logic, Sangwoo’s posture is no different from what he has seen before, but in those words. Jaeyoung realized the trust that the other party has for his parents, even if the person himself says that he is a black mamba snake like this, but he also knows that the family is one of the strong pillars that support Sangwoo’s world. Jaeyoung felt love and guilt that he had for the other party.

   ‘I hope you are right.’ 

   If it has to become an enemy with parents because of this matter. How much will Sangwoo be shocked, how much pain will he have, and how much will he suffer from the wrong feelings? Jaeyoung’s eyes met with a sincere gaze looking at himself with complex emotions. At that time, the kitchen door opened.

   “Chu Sangwoo.”

   “Yes.”

   “It’s been a while since we’ve had a good conversation.”

   “Okay.”

   Sangwoo’s father put on a jacket from a hanger and walked to the front door. With a cigarette in his hand and a clear bottle out. Sangwoo looked at the ground before walking into the kitchen. Then he came out with a small glass.

   Jaeyoung stood up, grabbed what was in the other person’s hand.

   “I’ll go instead.”

   Sangwoo looked at the floor, contemplating before raising his head and locking eyes with Jaeyoung.

   “I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. I’ll handle your father myself.”

   Sangwoo, who spoke like that, looked strangely radiant, so Jaeyoung realized for the first time that he had fallen deeply in love with the other party.

   As he spread his arms. Sangwoo came in and hugged him as if it were certain. Jaeyoung forgot even the slightest fear and hugged the other party tightly, and that hug gave him great courage. Jaeyoung lightly kissed Sangwoo’s forehead before heading to the door.

   “Wait.”

   While putting on his shoes, Sangwoo called him. When he turned back to look at his neck, there was something wrapped around it, it was Sangwoo’s scarf.

   “It’s cold outside.”

   Sangwoo wrapped his scarf tightly and smiled a little, he had no other choice but to smile and accept. “I’ll be right back.”  Jaeyoung clapped his hands and walked outside.

   Sangwoo’s father was smoking in the backyard, the view of the small mountains was peaceful, the neglected yard was filled with overgrown weeds. Only the fruit trees towering towards the sky seemed formidable. Jaeyoung thought this disorder suited the wandering poet and walked towards the round wooden table. As he sat on the chair shaped like a barrel, the middleaged man let out a surprised breath of smoke.

   “Why is it you? Where about Sangwoo?”

   “I wanted to talk to you sir, so I came instead of Sangwoo.”

   As soon as he replied, an uneasiness filled the room, but Jaeyoung pretended not to notice anything and placed two glasses of liquor on the table. When he reached for the Soju bottle and opened it, the poet held up the glass reluctantly. After pouring the glass full, Jaeyoung’s turn came. He received the liquor gracefully and placed it in front of himself.

   “It’s someone I know who sent it, I hope you’ll enjoy it.”

   The other side smiled and turned to smoke the remaining cigarette, a nonchalant expression on his side face.

   “I’m sorry.”

   “Of course.”

   He did not refuse and quickly drank the liquor. Jaeyoung turned to his side and drank along with the other, the strong liquor felt like it was burning his throat but he did not show any signs.

   “I am worried and sad because he will cross the water and the sea far away, but I can’t help him. He managed to work at the company he always wanted to work at since he was a child. I am proud of my son. Not just talking, but if he wants to do something, he will do everything. I heard that company is a big gaming company, right? They must have around 200 employees, right.”

   It seemed that Sangwoo would not properly explain the company to his father. As far as Jaeyoung knew, there were fewer than ten times the number of employees there.

   “Not just Sangwoo, but it’s something that many people dream of working on. Sir, you should be proud.”

   “That’s right. And he even brought his friend to the house… I was really surprised when I heard for the first time that he would be living with someone else. I thought he was doing it to save on food expenses because those kids were already disciples. So I sent him money, but he returned it and said he had enough. So I thought he finally had friends he could get along with.”

   “Yes.”

   “For me, I thought you were the same kind of person as Sangwoo, like math, science, friends who would split the groceries even if it was just ten won. But I didn’t think you were a normal person like this… Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to judge you, but I know that Sangwoo doesn’t maintain normal human relationships.”

   “I understand.”

   The second glass of liquor was refilled and emptied instantly.

   “How did you become close with Sangwoo? Because as far as I know, that kid only has three friends, and they only meet when they want to play games. I don’t think they’re really close.”

   Im Se-won, Kim Chung-ho, Kim Won-jong, one is an office worker. The other two are students, and they only contact each other about two to three times a year. They seem like normal good kids.

   “We first met because of a group project for a class…”  Many details were skipped, but it wasn’t a lie. 

   ________________________________________.

[1]    Saengseonjeon. A Korean dish made by dipping fish meat in a mixture of flour and egg and then frying it. It looks similar to pancakes. 

[2]    Bulgogi. A Korean dish made by stir-frying marinated beef. 

    

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