SOUTHBESIDETHESKY, Chapter 21: For Special One
“Thank you for what?”
“…”
“What do you think Phii Fah is thanking me for, or am I just hearing things?’
“I don’t know, Phoon, you’ve been asking me since morning.’
‘It’s bothering me.”
‘I don’t know, I’m not Phii Fah,’ Ter turned to me, sighing with a tired look because Phii Fah’s ‘thank you’ kept me awake last night, so I had to bother Ter with what was bothering me, ‘Anyway, what you should focus on is that Phii Fah helped you, right?”
“…That thing,” I said in a muffled voice, burrowing into Ter’s arm,
“Hic, Ter.”
“Ouch, Phoon, get off, it’s hot”’
“Ter!”
“Your voice is cracking again.’”
“Sob, Phii Fah is so kind, he even remembered that I’m afraid of the dark,” I ignored Ter trying to push me away. I burrowed in even more, before Ter sighed in resignation and stopped pushing.
“Alright, let it out.”
“You, I’m like…” I raised my hand to my chest with a pleased expression.
“You remind me of that one team,” Ter said after seeing my face,
“The one with the fat cat, that does the heart-holding pose.”
“Really?” I thought for a moment, “Yeah, I’ve seen that.”
“Come on, do it again, I’ll turn you into a meme.”
“No way, I’m shy.”
“Quick, give me twenty.”
“Alright,” I raised my hand to do the heart-holding pose again, making a pleased face once more. Ter lifted his camera to take a picture of me, “Where’s my twenty?”
“Here,” Ter handed me a green banknote. I smiled and took it immediately, like it was the copyright fee for him using my photo for a meme, “I don’t need to look for memes anymore, I’ll just use you as the cat team.”
“Oh come on,” I said sarcastically, “Now, back to my issue.”
“Sigh” Ter exhaled wearily, I’ve been teasing him since morning,
“What do you think you should thank him for?”
“I don’t know, man, come on!” Ter shook me, losing patience, “He thanked you, shouldn’t you know why? I, I don’t know anything, what are you expecting from me?”
“Ouch, I’m getting dizzy, stop, stop,” I said to stop him before Ter let go, “Or…do you think there’s a chance Phii Fah knows about the person in the letters?”
“Hmm, why would he know?”
“I don’t know.”
“Did you accidentally write in the letter’s style for Phii Fah?” “No,” I shook my head. I was sure I wrote in my normal handwriting on the gift, “No, no, that’s not true.” “Then, did you thank or apologize for something?”
“Normally, people say thanks, would someone else apologize?” “I don’t know, but I doubt it,” Ter said with an annoyed look, “Why don’t you just ask? Then you’ll know for sure.”
“‘No,’ I started whining when Ter pushed me to go ask Phii Fah again, ‘No. Not asking. Don’t know. Not going. Not meeting. No, no, no.’
“Yeah, you’re good at being shy.”
“You, I still don’t know how to act when I meet Phii Fah, knowing that tonight we have to study together again, I”ve been practicing smiling since last night,” I said honestly, because we hadn’t talked in a year. I felt tense in a way I couldn’t explain, and knowing we’d be studying together today, I tried to act natural.
“Come on, smile.”
I forced a wide smile.
“Yeah, you’re so tense it even reaches your eyebrows.”
‘really?”
“Yeah, just be yourself.”
“Be myself how? We haven ‘t talked in a year. I don’t know what to do.”
“Come on,” Ter gently tapped my shoulder, “Let’s go eat after class, okay?”
“Yeah,” I nodded in agreement. Right now, Ter and I were in class, and Foam still hadn’t come back, probably dealing with some family business, “Ah, we haven’t visited Dao yet.”
“Dao has been discharged from the hospital, haven’t you seen the
LINE messages?”
“Oh, really? That was quick.”
“It wasn’t anything serious, was it?”
“Has he gotten better?”
“I think so. Otherwise, the doctor wouldn’t have let him out.”
“Hmm…he really deserves a good beating, not eating like that.” “You used to barely eat yourself, Phoon. Don’t go thinking you can judge others for being beatable,” Ter said with a disgusted look, because I really didn’t eat much back then, and I didn’t sleep well either.
“Now I have to eat. You guys force me to,” I pouted, remembering that in the beginning, when I refused to eat, North threatened to punch me, and he actually raised his fist, though deep down he was worried, but his way of showing it was quite barbaric, “North should go force
Dao to eat too.”
“Just wait and see, North might just shove food into his mouth.”
“Honestly, it looks a bit harsh, but it’s cute in its own way.”
“Yeah, it’s the kind of cuteness from North that…is hard to see.”
“Ha ha.”
Because today we had an appointment to eat and then study together. Normally, I would have to wait around five to six to go to Phii Gibb’s coffee shop to drop off some stuff, but now, at about four, Phii Hill was already there to pick me up.
“What should I do…”
“Yeah, just tell them you have some errands, and you’ll follow later, okay?”
“Should I do that?”
“Hmm, or should we wait?”
“No, it’s fine, you go ahead. I’ll drop off the stuff at the coffee shop and then catch a taxi to the restaurant. Which restaurant are we going to?”
“I can’t remember the name of the place, I’ll send you the location later.”
“Okay.”
“Okay, don’t get lost.”
“I won’t. I’ll just get in a taxi.”
I watched Ter walk away. I sat waiting for a while near my faculty before heading to the medical building. I looked at my watch; it was about half past five, and people were starting to leave. I rushed to Phii Gibb’s coffee shop.
“How was this morning?” I asked Phii Gibb discreetly, referring to how Phii Fah was when he came to pick up the stuff this morning because I had left my Polaroid camera as a birthday gift.
“The doctor was smiling.”
“He looked happy, right?”
“Yes,” Phii Gibb nodded and smiled at me, “Here,” and handed me the bag Phii Fah had left in the morning. I took it and immediately put it in my bag.
“Please give him this for me,” I said with a smile, handing over the items I wanted to leave with Phii Gibb. Phii Gibb took them and placed them in the drawer under the counter, “Thank you.” “It’s no problem, so how are things going? How’s the relationship progressing?”
“Well…” I was silent for a moment, trying to hold back a smile but ended up smiling anyway, “Good.”
“Here, the doctor asked me to treat you to cocoa,” Phii Gibb said. I nodded to show I understood because Phii Fah and I always did this, treating each other. I was sitting on a chair in front of the counter; there was no one else in the shop since it was almost closing time, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone entering the shop.
Phii Fah…?
It felt like my heart stopped for a moment before it started beating fast, surprising even myself, when I saw the familiar person standing next to me.
Wh…why is he here?
Phii Fah looked at me with a slightly surprised expression before smiling. I slowly smiled back, but I was sure my smile must have looked very stiff.
“Here you go, cocoa for the special one,” Phii Gibb turned around holding a cup of cocoa, pausing when she saw Phii Fah standing next to me. I looked at Phii Gibb with a slightly uncomfortable gaze, and she gave a sheepish smile, as if apologizing, then placed the cocoa in front of me.
“The special one, huh?” Phii Fah asked, my heart beating hard and my hands starting to shake uncontrollably. I didn’t look to see what expression the person next to me had, but that tone of voice made me feel completely numb.
What…that cunning tone of voice.
“Oh…well, Phoon is a special customer of the shop.”
“I see,” Phii Fah said, “I’m here to pick up something.”
“Usually, you come in the morning, why are you here today?”
“I just happen to be free right now,” I took a sip of the cocoa in my hand to calm my nerves, Phii Gibb bent down to retrieve the same bag I had just handed her.
She straightened up, “Thank you.”
“No problem.”
“And did you treat him to cocoa?”
“Oh…of course, I haven’t forgotten.”
“Has he been here long?”
“For a while now.”
“Okay, then I’ll get going.”
“Okay,” Phii Gibb smiled. I just sat there quietly, feeling something indescribable because the cocoa Phii Fah had just asked if I had bought for him was the same cocoa in my hand right now. I tried to control my heartbeat from racing too much, but I didn’t succeed. I was almost panting.
“Will Phoon go to the study session too?”
“…Uh, yes.”
“How will you get there?”
“…I’ll take a taxi.”
“Wanna go with me?”
“…” I didn’t respond immediately; if I refused, it would definitely look bad because we were going the same way. So, I nodded slightly in response and followed Phii Fah quietly.
“Do you like this café?” Phii Fah asked while we were walking to the car. I wasn’t walking beside him, I was about one step behind.
“Uh…yes, I like it.”
“I thought your faculty had its own coffee shop, is this one better?”
“…Yes.”
Why do I feel so uncomfortable, and I don’t even know why? The coffee at my faculty is good too, but I had to come here, T^T. I got into Phii Fah’s car stiffly; perhaps it was because I hadn’t ridden in his car in a while, and to think of it, it wasn’t even the same car anymore. Did Phii Fah change cars again? The things Phii Fah just gave me were in my bag…
The cool air conditioning in the car didn’t help me feel relaxed at all, nor did the cold cocoa in my hand. Both my face and ears felt hot. I just kept looking out the car window as the luxurious car slowly left the medical faculty parking lot. Phii Fah still drove as smoothly as ever.
It felt nice because Phii Fah is one of the few people whose driving doesn’t make me dizzy.
“Phoon?”
“…Yes?”
“”How are you doing?”
“Good…I’m fine, and you, Phii Fah?”
“I’m good.”
“…okay.”
“…You can tell me anything.”
“…Oh,…okay.”
I clenched my lips tightly and started to feel a tightness in my heart. Of course, suddenly disappearing and then suddenly reappearing, anyone would feel surprised.
And between us, there was only silence until we reached the restaurant where we were supposed to have dinner together. I followed Phii Fah quietly as usual. I saw Ter, North, Phii Hill, Phii Jo, and Phii Arthit, all sitting there. The ones who looked the most surprised to see me walking with Phii Fah were clearly North and Ter.
I sat down next to Ter.
The person next to me didn’t say anything, probably because he knew it wasn’t the right time to talk. We ordered our food and started eating.
The atmosphere at the table wasn’t much different from usual, but I noticed that all the doctors seemed tired, probably because of exams. “Do you want beer?” Phii Jo turned to ask Phii Arthit, who nodded in agreement before Phii Jo ordered from the waiter.
“Don’t drink too much,” Phii Fah warned.
“Just enough to feel better.”
“Hmm.”
I’ve heard people say that drinking beer after work can help you relax, though I’m not sure if it’s true; it might depend on the person.
But North didn’t say anything when he saw Phii Jo drinking, as long as it wasn’t too much, he could still drive.
“The wind is strong like it’s going to rain,” Ter said after a breeze came in, “Hope it doesn’t rain again.” I looked around and felt the wind getting stronger and stronger, which made me uneasy because yesterday it rained and the power went out.
And then…it started raining.
“’Damn,” someone cursed as the rain began to fall. After we finished eating, we walked outside where there was still some shelter.” “Hill, where did you park your car?” Phii Jo asked. It seemed like this café had several parking spots.
“Out back, what about you?”
“Next to, uh, Arthit.”
“What should we do?” Phii Hill asked, “Go straight to the café?”
“We’ll have to go now. Otherwise, we won’t have time to study,”
Phii Jo said, “Phii Fah, where did you park?”
“Right in front.”
“Okay, then see you at the café.”
“Uhmm,” Phii Fah responded, before Phii Jo took North to where his car was parked with Phii Arthit walking along, and then Phii Hill turned to ask me.
“Will Phoon go with them, or with me?”
“…Uh, I’ll go with you,” I replied, because I came with Phii Fah, how could I let him walk through the rain to the car alone? Then Phii Hill and Ter walked off in another direction.
“Wouldn’t it be better to go with Hill? You wouldn’t get as wet,” Phii Fah asked when it was just the two of us standing there, sheltering from the rain. I shook my head gently.
“It’s fine.”
“Okay.”
Suddenly, there was silence between us again amidst the sound of the pouring rain, which made me think of yesterday when Phii Fah came to help me when I was stuck in the bathroom. It was strange that we should have hurried to the car, but instead, we were standing here as if we had something to say to each other.
“Yesterday…thank you for coming to help.”
“Sure…it’s no problem.”
“I remembered that you are afraid of the dark.”
“I remember, yes.”
“And then…silence…again.
“Phii Fah.”
“Yes?”
“In the past year…I have grown a lot.”
“I can see that, you have become good.”
I smiled a little when I heard that, not looking at the person beside me to see what expression he was making.
“You are not going to ask why I…”
“Do you want to tell?”
“No.”
“Then it’s fine, I believe it must be something that was very hard for you.”
“Yes…”
I wanted to say ‘thank you for understanding,’ but I’ve been saying ‘thank you’ to Phii Fah too much lately. Maybe because, for me, there are hundreds of reasons to thank Phii Fah.
“At first, I was very afraid that you would be angry…”
I turned to look at the person next to me, then fell silent as his hand gently patted my head. I looked up at Phii Fah, feeling like my breath was caught for a moment when I saw him giving me a warm smile.
“I told you, I am not angry, don’t overthink it.”
“Y-yes…”
I showed a faint smile, my face flushing red, feeling warmth spread across my chest, my heart beating so fast it felt like it might burst out, until Phii Fah let out a small laugh. I then looked back at him.
“What is it?”
“Nothing.”
“…”
“Just thinking you’re really small, too.”
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