MYENGINEER, CHAPTER 60: The Person Who Gets Punished
[Duenhaw]
“We’ll find out soon, Bohn.”
“Alright…no group has been wrong yet, let’s reveal it one group at a time…King’s group first!” Good! That’s how it should be, Phii Chai! I turned to give a wicked smile to the person next to me before pulling out my phone to prepare to record a clip.
“Hah. If your group is wrong, you’ll be in for it, Duen.”
“Wow, Nong Bohn is definitely going to get it!”
“…”
“So, Frang, was King’s group correct?” Phii Chai walked over to ask. The person he asked didn’t answer yet. He gave a sinister smile to Bohn, who was about to say something but was interrupted.
“Oh, I think it’s not suspenseful at all, both of them…let’s get two more people to come out and guess the outcome, I’ll give a free jar of orchids to each if they guess right.” Wow, you said they were rare, do you have so many, Phii Chai?
“Me!!!”
“Move! The real one is coming, move!”
“Salty snail! Move, I and Shuchat will go ourselves.”
“You move! Don’t you see I was here before you, right, Foodfighter Chris?”
“That’s right, you bastard, just admit it.”
Chaos ensued when he said that. Are those jars that desirable? At first, I just glanced over, thinking they might have mold or moss on them.
“Kids, calm down, I haven’t said yet that it could be anyone.”
“Oh.” We all exclaimed in unison. The forestry department seniors laughed until they were in tears.
“The first person, I want someone born on December 31st, any year. If there’s more than one, I’ll let all of them come out.” So, you don’t just have two or three jars of orchids, huh? You can give them away like that.
“Screaaaaam, it’s me, me!! Oh yeah! It feels like I’ve won a crown. How about that, you losers, you can race in a boat, race in talk, but you can’t race in luck, can you?” Wow, what luck, and she’s the only one born on that day.
“Okay, your name is Maduey, right?”
“Yes, Phii.”
“What number do you like, Maduey?”
“Seven.”
“Then I’ll choose the 7th, July anyone born on the 7th of July, please come out. Anyone born today, show yourself quickly.” Such a good number, seven Duen seven, wait…today is…
“…It’s me.”
“…You’re going to be lucky.” Phii Chai said into the microphone. How could he not be lucky? The person born on this day is a member of the group about to win the prize.
Ram.
“I won’t consider this void, it’s his luck. So, Maduey, what do you think the result will be?”
“Nong Tang’s group got it right.”
“Damn, I knew it, how about it, Bohn? I’m definitely winning, others think so too.”
“It’s just guessing, it doesn’t prove anything.” Bohn shrugged before giving a sardonic smile, damn! I hate your smile so much, you jerk.
“And what about you, Nong Ram, who do you think?”
“…”
“What do you say?”
“I think…well.”
Aren’t you going to support your own group, Vera? Like, ‘It has to be my group. We’ve trained for this moment for lifetimes. There’s no way we could be wrong,’ something like that, I see athletes say this before competitions.
“Okay, we’ve heard from everyone…Alright! Let’s see the answer, is Tang’s group correct, Oat!!”
I leaned forward to get a clear look at Phii Oat’s face. He scratched his head back and forth before opening his mouth, what is it! P as in bee, or T as in bag, open your mouth wide, Phii Oat!!!
“Correct.”
“Yay…I got the orchid!! And not just any orchid!! But a rare tissue-cultured orchid, screeeeeeeeeeeeeech!!!”
“Yay!!!” My group stood up and cheered so loudly it shook the forest. How’s that, you bastard, I answered correctly. You’re definitely pole dancing, Bohn. And you too, Ram. How can you not favor your own group, you deserve a head slap for that.
Heh.
“So, what now?” I nudged my lover’s shoulder; Bohn looked annoyed and flicked my nose in irritation. What’s wrong with you! Are you jealous? I told you I was lucky today, hee-hee.
“Just because your group was right doesn’t mean mine was wrong, you fool.”
“You scoundrel, I’ll watch the scoundrel pole dance.” I reached up to pinch both his cheeks, making the most mischievous face I could. It worked! Bohn was really annoyed, haha…
“Scoundrel” is another word my Thai language teacher taught me, derived from “don’t come.”
“Hah. We’ll see about that.” Sure, sure, I’ll watch…watch someone pole dance.
“Okay, Maduey, come get your orchid after we’ve revealed King’s group’s answers.” Alright, Phii Duen is not in a hurry. Whether I get it late or early, I’ll get it anyway. Phii Duen promises to take good care of the orchid; it won’t die, for sure!!
“So, Frang, was King’s group correct?”
“Seems like heaven is on my side, Bohn, huh.” There you go! I told you!
“So, was it correct?”
“Come out and pole dance with me, you bastard…it was wrong!”
Yay!!!!!!!!!!” I stood up and cheered, dancing around my lover. Wow, Bohn pole dancing, Bohn pole dancing, Bohn pole dancing, wow, what now, you bastard, I told you you’d get it.
“Wow, why are you so happy, huh?” Of course, Phii Duen is happy, what’s wrong with that? I’ve got to record this clip for the kids; Daonuea and Ben need to see what their dad, Bohn, has done.
“Shh.”
“Then don’t look so grumpy, smile.” I bent down to push his lips into a smile. He made a slight huff but didn’t push me away. Well, I understand the feeling. Who would want to pole dance, especially a guy? It’s so embarrassing.
“It’s okay, there’s another team to dance with you, please welcome the team of Oat and Frong.” So, no other team was wrong except for Bohn’s and Phii Frong’s. Poor them, let’s record everyone, huh, ha, ha.
“…I’ll…”
“Alright, go stand on the hill, I’ll play the music and…”
“Sorry…I said it wrong.”
Silence fell over the area when one man raised his hand and spoke that sentence. I wouldn’t care if it wasn’t…
“What did you say, Oat?”
“I looked wrong earlier, thought the bean filling was an eel, sorry.”
“…”
“That means…uh, you have to dance with the pole, huh, heh.” The person who had a world-weary expression earlier whispered in my ear, your voice is so punchable, but Phii Duen needs a moment to be stunned. “Please, Nong Tang’s team, come out to dance on the pole together.” Oh my God!!!!
“Don’t be sad. Even if both groups answered incorrectly, there’s one person who got it right…Please, Nong Ram.” Yes, before, Ram had said, ‘I think they’re both wrong.’ At that time, I thought he was so stupid, but now I must pay homage to his brilliance.
After that, our whole group walked out to the hill along with the other two groups who were also being punished. The pole was made of bamboo…a whole bamboo stalk, wow, and how do you slide on this pole?
“Don’t be afraid, everyone, I will lead.” It’s like you can read my mind, teacher. Only Phii Boss seems to be enjoying this, even someone as cheerful as Phii King is sad, probably really wanted that orchid, oh well, poor him…I also feel sorry for myself, haha.
“Okay, are you ready?”
“Yes…” It was the most disheartened sound I’ve ever heard. I was one of the people making that sound, damn it…this won’t be spread around, if anyone leaks this, Phii Duen will sever his head!
“At first, it was embarrassing to have to come out and dance, but when there’s someone you love dancing with you like this, it’s actually quite fun.” You don’t need to say who it is, right? Who else could it be but that jerk, Bohn.
“Shut up, bastard, damn it!”
“Come on, just dance. Follow Boss.”
“That’s easy to say.” Recently, he did a basic invert…oh wow, I can mimic that one.
“You told me to smile earlier. Now you’re not smiling, come on, smile.” He pulled up the corners of my mouth on both sides, teasing me?
“Damn. I don’t want to slide on the pole, it’s embarrassing.”
“Why be embarrassed? I’m the only one watching.” “Lonely man!” Look down at the people below!
“Alright, sorry for wasting time. If everyone’s ready…the music’s coming!!” As Phii Chai’s voice ended, the music started blaring from the big speakers behind us. Phii Boss has already started dancing. Oh no!! Just the beginning and I can’t handle it!
“If you don’t dance here, I’ll make you dance at the hill in front of everyone at the camp.” You’re so mean, Phii Chai, don’t you know this needs some emotional build-up!
“Follow Boss, everyone! Quick, or you’ll end up dancing at the office!” Alright, let’s do it then!!!
“Uh…what do you want with my bamboo? Do you want to be a panda, want to eat bamboo?” I tilted my head to ask my lover, who grabbed my bamboo. Hey! He threw it away. And he did it with such an innocent look.
“Oh, damn, Bohn, what am I supposed to use as a pole now?” Stealing mine, huh? The other seemed to catch on to my thoughts, pulling his own bamboo out and throwing it next to mine…wait! What are you going to use as a pole then? No, both of us, that’s what!
“I’ll be your pole.”
“Huh!”
“Uh-huh, I’ll be your pole, and you’ll be mine.” After saying that, he grabbed my waist and started swaying to the music. Aren’t you ashamed to do something like this?!
“Don’t be crazy, Bohn!”
“Oh, do those two want to dance at the office? Throwing away the poles like that, dance with each other then!” Phii Chai, did you bribe Bohn or something? I’m sure of it!
“Let go! I’m going to get another pole.”
“Don’t even think about it, fool.”
“Start dancing now. If you don’t start in three seconds, I’ll really make you dance in front of the office!” Damn it, TT [] TT!!!
“What have I done! Whoever recorded, delete all the clips, you bastard!!”
“Yeah, don’t let me see them, or I’ll…I’ll cry, please.”
“My manliness…”
The sound of lamentations and crying came from the group that went out to slide on the pole. We’ve been crying from the first station to this final one, how much time has passed, my disgrace hasn’t faded…
“Damn, so embarrassing, really embarrassing, I can’t face my wife and kids anymore.” I covered my face with my hands, so ashamed, sliding down a pole is bad enough, but this!!
“You don’t have a wife, you have a husband.”
“Shut up, bastard, it’s just lamenting my life.” I elbowed him in the stomach, screw it! I don’t care anymore. It’s over, so let it be!! Phii Duen doesn’t care, today Phii Duen will weave leaves.
“Wow…all the juniors look so world-weary, what have you been doing?” “Sliding down the pole…”
“Oh, ha ha ha.”
“Come on, we’re all men, let’s weave leaves to de-stress, you can choose whatever you like, any shape, any leaf, you can make more than one thing. We’re the last group.” The seniors…no, the uncles, there are five of them at this station, each with a basket beside them full of pandan leaves, coconut leaves, and many more. I’ll take the coconut leaves.
“Bohn, I’m going to weave the cupcake first, I’ll compete with Ting.” I just walked past Tingting’s group, and she ran over to mock me right there, sir.
‘Ha! Look at you, I won’t be single anymore because I’m weaving birds to break the curse!!! No one is smarter than me now. Heh heh, I’m not selling crickets anymore, I’ll sell birds! This time you’ll be confused!! Women with the same fate as me will come rushing to buy!!…Knowing this, I should weave a snail too, maybe it’ll come into my life. Actually, there are many snails around me, but they’re not used for…ugh…I’m stressed again. Because of you, damn Duen!! Because you got Phii Bohn as your husband, now all the other friends want one too, I’ll ban you for three seconds!! Come beg me too, ugh.’
“Uh, this is the nephew from yesterday…right, forgetful uncle?”
“Yes, yes, uncle, can you weave a cupcake?”
“I really want to weave one, the cupcake is small, should be easy to make. If it turns out nice, I’ll give it to Phii Thara as a gift!”
“Hmm. Can’t do that, how about an animal?”
“A cupcake is an animal, too…oh, I forgot that’s just a nickname.” Normally, I call it by name because I don’t want to say the species…just hearing the name gives me goosebumps.
“If it’s an animal, that’s fine, but what kind of animal is this cupcake?” “A lizard.”
“…”
“Why so quiet?”
“I want to hashtag ‘Bohn’s wife is funny,’ haha!” Everyone around us burst into laughter. What’s so funny? I really want to weave a lizard, come on.
“Okay, okay, I’ll teach you myself, haha.”
“What do we do first, uncle?” I asked. No one was doing it like me. Bohn excused himself to do something with Phii King’s group. Tang and his friends went to weave hats on the tree side. What the heck…
“Do you want a big one?” Uncle Cham asked. Big one? Actually, I’d like one big enough to hit King over the head, but given my skills, it would probably be tiny.
“Is it hard?”
“Just a bit.”
“Then let’s do a small one, so it looks more realistic.”
I sat down to weave the lizard with Uncle Cham. At first, there were a lot of people in the group, but somehow, as time went by, I was the only one left.
“Exactly.”
“And then tuck the ends here…done.” I followed what Uncle Cham said and then looked down at my work. It was really a lizard…life-sized too, damn.
I’ll name him…Supasit!
He’ll be friends with Chai. Once it’s dry, I’ll coat it with varnish to make it durable, waterproof, and resistant to wear. Then I’ll put it in my trophy cabinet, along with the trophy that Phu is most proud of, Supasri!
“Thank you very much, Uncle Cham!” I raised my hands to pay respects to the elder in front of me, sweating profusely, both Uncle Cham and me. Teaching me must have been quite a challenge.
“Yeah, yeah, keep it safe, my nephew.”
“Yes, sir.”
I’ve got to show this off to others.
“Ram!”
“?”
“What are you doing?” I looked down at what my close friend was doing. What is that, it even has a tail, so cute. Those white leaves, are they coconut leaves too?
“A platy fish.”
“Wow, it’s beautiful, why is it so big?” It looks plump and big. It’s nothing like the platy fish of the person next to me. What did you give it to eat, Vera?
“It’s a double-decker platy fish.” I raised my eyebrows before sitting down next to him, very interested. I can’t even make the first layer, and you’re already surpassing me, you rice pudding.
“There are layers too?”
“Do you want to learn? I’ll teach you.” I nodded and sat on his lap, as I’ve said, Ram is like my second dad, really. I like being with him; the atmosphere is very warm.
“How many layers do you want?”
“One layer is enough.”
“Tear off the palm leaves.”
“This pale one, right?”
“Uh, and then…” Ram taught me step by step; learning from him made me understand a lot more. When King taught, it wasn’t like this at all, he just kept saying, “It goes into that hole, yeah, that’s it…push it in. You see that long, messy line, right? Go for it.” In the end, I didn’t get anything done all day.
“Ram…why doesn’t it look like a platy fish?” Uh, is this fish sick?
“It does, in your style.”
“You’re good at comforting, damn.”
“No…really.”
“Thanks anyway, friends.”
“Time’s up, come sit here quickly.”
Uncle Cham announced over the microphone, oh well. I haven’t made that much yet; I still wanted to make a bird to compete with Ting.
We walked to our designated spots, Bohn came back, holding something, but I didn’t pay attention. Right now, I’m enamored with my two little ones.
It’s okay, kids. Even though we look terrible, dad loves us.
Clap-clap.
“Seniors, please take the knowledge you’ve gained today and use it in your daily life, do anything with it…like if there’s a coconut tree at home, if you want it to look nice, you can pluck the leaves to weave fish for fun or whatever. That’s all for today, thank you.”
“Thank you very much!” We all raised our hands to salute the uncles at the station before walking away in an orderly fashion. Each person carried one or two items they’d made. I think it’s a good way to spend our free time, definitely. When I get home, I’ll teach Daonuea…if I remember how.
“Duen.”
“What?” …his face is red, is something wrong, or is he about to faint, that’s why he called me? Oh no, the first-aid kit is with the senior at the front of the line. I guess I’ll have to run and get it. “Wait here, I’ll be back. Stay in the shade, okay?”
“Huh??” He grabbed my wrist when he saw me about to run off, gripping tightly. Don’t exert yourself so much! You’ll faint! “Where are you going?”
“To get the first-aid kit.”
“To do what?” Oh, I was just trying to help you, you ungrateful bastard.
“You look like you’re about to faint from the heat.”
“Who told you that?”
“Why do you need someone to tell me? I’m a doctor. Your face is so red, if it’s not heatstroke, then what?”
“…It’s not heatstroke, I’m just embarrassed.”
“?”
“Here, I made this for you.”
“…” I looked down at what he just handed me. It was green, smelled nice, not too big, not too small…and importantly, the craftsmanship was impressive.
“You did this to mock me! That’s going too far, Bohn.” You’re so mean, he must have seen my kids and wanted to mock them.
“Oh, come on, Duen, I swear…that’s not it!”
“Then what?”
“Let’s trade. You give me your rose plant, I give you this pandan rose.”
“Ah…Oh.” I responded awkwardly, raising my finger to scratch my cheek in embarrassment before looking away…I wasn’t prepared for something like this.
“Are you embarrassed?” You’re embarrassed too, you bastard! And you still have the nerve to poke my cheek, just wait! If I get too embarrassed, I’ll bite your neck off.
“Uh, no, I’m not embarrassed! Try being me, and you’ll know how it feels…I’m sorry I haven’t done anything for you.”
“You don’t have to do anything for me. You’ve already given me so much. It’s my turn to give.”
May I touch your chest for a moment? Just to make sure that the lump in front is still in good condition. Hello, heart, are you still in place? I saw it beating so hard, I’m worried it might pop out.
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