NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 30 part 1

   Chapter 30: Never Be Alone

   I woke up groggily to the sound of the alarm clock; it was 6 AM. Normally, I wake up around this time to make breakfast, and today was no exception. Today is the Sports Day event, where my faculty has an early event. As a second-year, my activities include looking after the freshmen, managing various tasks for them, and it seems Phii Johan has free time since he doesn’t care much about such events.

I slowly moved out of the embrace from behind and got out of bed. Since he was asleep, he wasn’t holding me tightly. I got up to shower and then went into the kitchen. Yesterday, we went to the supermarket with Kett to stock up on fresh ingredients. I opened the fridge, scanning the contents while thinking about what to cook.

“Why aren’t you in bed?” The deep, slightly irritated voice came from behind. Phii Joe had just woken up, but as I’ve noted before, he always looks good regardless.

This happens all the time. If I get up from bed, about half an hour later, Phii Joe would wake up too. I think it’s a better alarm than any clock. If I’m still in bed, he won’t wake up no matter how many alarms go off.

“Making breakfast.” I said, turning back to the kitchen counter.

“Isn’t today a weekend?”

“I have to go to Sports Day.” I said as I prepared the food. Suddenly, Phii Joe hugged me from behind, leaning down to press his lips against my cheek.

“Can I have a morning kiss?”

I turned around, tilting my head up to meet his lips in a gentle kiss, holding it for a moment before pulling away.

“Good morning.” I said with a smile, and Phii Joe returned a slight smile as well.

“What are we having for breakfast?”

“Soymilk with Chinese doughnuts.” I said teasingly with a slight chuckle, then heard Phii Joe sigh.

“Ugh, do I have to eat that again?”

“Bored of it?”

“I’ve been eating it for breakfast for three years.” Phii Joe said with a tone of boredom, “But I’ll eat more if you made it. I could eat it for a lifetime.”

“Then…I’ll make it for you for a lifetime, don’t get tired of it, okay?” I responded with an embarrassed smile.

“Even if it’s sweet.”

“You’re complaining about it being sweet again. Without sugar syrup, it wouldn’t taste good.” I objected.

“Did you sneak in sugar syrup?”

“Yes, I always do. Without it, it wouldn’t be tasty.”

“Don’t you understand the concept of ‘not sweet’?”

“It’s not sweet then.”

“You argue well.” Phii Joe said before pinching my cheek in annoyance, then kissed my cheek again and let go. He probably went to shower while I was cooking, “Make me some coffee too.” “No can do, today’s a no-coffee day, you don’t have classes or work, take a break from coffee, please.” I said. After my words, Phii Joe didn’t respond. I didn’t turn around to look, but I bet he was making a sulky face, because I’m just worried, he’s too addicted to coffee.

I placed the finished meal on the table.

“Are you staying at the university today, or will you be in the room?” I asked, because Phii Joe didn’t have to go to the university today, it seemed like his day off.

“I’ll stay at the university.”

“Will you be at the medical school’s stand?”

“Yes.”

“Will you be working late? I feel lazy.” I grumbled while making a sulky face, “Did you get on the stand as a freshman?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“And what did you do as a freshman?”

“Nothing really.”

“Okay.”

I think Phii Joe isn’t really suited for university life, because he already has a job, and he’s good at it. It seems like he’s only studying out of necessity for his image. He doesn’t care much about studies or activities, just studying to get the degree, but being a doctor is hard work, so he can’t really take it easy.

“Uh, Phii.” I said, remembering something, “About the job thing.”

“I thought we’ve already talked this through.”

“Yes, but I wants to say, can you not hire a housekeeper anymore? Hire me instead, like for cleaning the room and stuff. I’ll take the same salary as the housekeeper.” I proposed what Nao had suggested. It counts as work, doesn’t it? And since Phii Joe doesn’t want me to do part-time work outside, there’s no need for me to leave the house.

Phii Joe was silent for a moment before agreeing.

“You still want to work, right?” He asked, reaching out to gently pat my head.

“Yes, it feels strange doing nothing at all.”

“Hmm.” Before he took out his wallet and placed some bills on the table in front of me.

“Yes, what’s this?”

“It’s for making breakfast.”

I glanced at the money on the table.

Five thousand…?

“Isn’t that too much?” I asked, feeling hesitant. Just for making breakfast, five thousand seemed excessive, but my words seemed to slightly displease him.

“Take it.”

“Okay.” I picked up the five thousand baht and put it in my wallet, because from his demeanor, Phii Joe would definitely be annoyed if I didn’t accept it. Why does he always seem displeased when I say I feel hesitant? Maybe like Nao said, sometimes the giver really wants to give, and being too hesitant might be considered impolite.

“North, you could ask for something sometimes, Joe wants to give anyway.”

   That’s something Phii Hill once told me, but I’m not really fond of asking for things from others. I’ve been working and saving for a long time, but if you ask if I’ve ever asked for anything at home, it usually comes with conditions, like I have to do something in return for the reward, because I feel like I’ve earned it by effort, not gotten it for free.

“Phii Joe.” I called out, moving from my chair to sit next to him instead.

“Hmm?” “I wants to ask for something.”

“Say.”

“If North gets a GPA of 3.5 this semester, I want a PS4.”

“Sure, but 3.5, really?” Phii Joe asked back, “What was your GPA last semester?”

“2.7.”

“Then a 3 should be enough.”

“Wow, but, a PS4? Is just a 3 good enough?”

“I could just buy it for you, you know.”

“No, we should trade for it. I doesn’t want to just ask for it.” I said, “So, if I get a 3, can I ask for a game from a stream, one that just came out, North wants to play.”

Phii Johan raised his hand to his chin, looking at me with a somewhat puzzled expression.

“You’re so frugal.”

“It’s not being frugal, the game costs over seven hundred baht.”

“You could buy it with the money I just gave you.” Phii Joe said, “And what about the tens of thousands I gave you before, what did you do with that? Why haven’t you used it?”

“Oh, I saved it.” I said truthfully. I always send part of the money I earn back home, saving it for emergencies.

“Is that why you complain about not having money?”

“Huh? Does I complain?” I do complain, but I remember not complaining to Phii Joe. The reason I don’t have much money is because I’m not working.

“Ter told me.”

“Such a tattletale.” I muttered softly, making a slight pout. Why does Ter snitch like that? Or is it revenge for all the times I tattled on him to Phii Hill? He can be quite vindictive. “Why don’t you ever tell me anything?”

“…North is just being considerate.” I answered honestly, then inadvertently avoided the serious gaze of the person in front of me.

“Normally, I have to work, right? If I’m just sitting idle, there’s no way I’d get anything. It’s a habit from childhood. If have no money, I work more. Not doing anything makes me feel like I’m not useful at all.” Because my dad passed away when I was young, I felt like I had to take care of my mom. I’ve been working since I was very young, and when my little brother Night came along, I had to take care of him too. I feel like the eldest brother.

I felt like I needed to be strong for everyone at home.

“So you need to work all the time?” Phii Joe asked.

“Yes.” I nodded in response, “But because I’m studying too, sometimes I can’t go to work. Those times were really tough. No work, no money.” I said with a chuckle directed at him. It really was tough back then. I didn’t dare tell the family because I felt too reluctant. Phii Joe let out a small sigh at my words, then reached out to gently pat my head.

“From now on…”

“…”

“You can rely on me sometimes, okay?”

His words, the warm gaze, and the firm hand stroking my head felt like a surge of strength was flowing through me. I suddenly hugged him without even understanding my own actions.

Why do I, who thought I was always strong, feel like this is the place where I can show my vulnerability?

“North; you aren’t alone anymore, understand?”

“Yes, I understand.”

I’ve been sitting on the engineering faculty stands all day. The Sports Day at my university is divided into two parts. The daytime, known as Sports Day, involves track and field events. We’ve been cheering all day under the hot sun. The nighttime, called Spirit Night, is for performances by each faculty’s stands and cheerleaders.

Phii Joe was with Phii Hill and Phii Fah at the medical faculty stands, right next to the engineering ones. The medical faculty’s stand was incredibly elaborate, clearly a lot of money was spent on it. Our engineering stand was also quite nice, though not as grandiose.

Today’s weather during the day was pretty hot, and Phii Joe isn’t fond of the heat. I was a bit worried, especially since he didn’t have coffee today, which I guessed would make him both sleepy and irritable, having to sit and be bored at the stands in this heat.

During the daytime sports events, there wasn’t much to do besides cheering. Nao was in the relay race, being the first leg, and Tiger was the last. They seemed to be on normal speaking terms, so I guess they’ve made up.

Now it’s evening, and there’s going to be a parade of each faculty. I’m quite excited; I’ve heard that the parades are so spectacular they’re almost unbelievable. The medical faculty is particularly watched because not only is their stand elaborate, but their parade is expected to be as well.

But oddly, as the parade was being prepared, the weather wasn’t cooperative. It’s said that this happens every year, similar to many past Spirit Night events where the parade was held despite the rain. Since preparation for the event takes months, stopping for rain would be a pity, including for the stands and cheerleaders.

“Are they here? Which faculty is first?” Skater asked excitedly as he leaned forward to look. The parade began to enter through the main gate, and the announcer introduced the first faculty as the Faculty of Medicine. “Did your boyfriend get to walk?” Nao turned to ask me. I shook my head in response, “I thought he would.”

Screams erupted from the stands next to us as people started standing up to get a better view, blocking my sight. The engineering stand started getting noisy too. Everyone seemed to be in a frenzy.

I could barely hear over the screaming and the shrieking, it was so loud I wanted to cover my ears. As the parade passed by our stand, I finally got to see it. It was Phii Hill in his student uniform with slightly styled hair, leading the parade with the Faculty of Medicine’s banner.

“Hey, did Phii Hill get a haircut or something? It’s not the style he had before.” Skater asked, shouting to be heard over the screams.

“I guess so, Phii Hill looks insanely handsome with this haircut.” I said, reflecting my thoughts.

“Yeah, he’s handsome, really handsome, I’ll admit.” Duennao said, “When he leads the parade like this, his aura is just through the roof.” I nodded in agreement, Phii Hill is genuinely handsome, otherwise, he wouldn’t be the faculty’s representative. I’ve been praising Phii Hill to the point of exhaustion ever since he started courting Ter.

“Wait a minute.” I said, “More than anything, I hate that he doesn’t look at any other camera except Ter’s.” I spoke up when I noticed Ter with a camera capturing the parade, and Phii Hill wasn’t looking at any other camera but Ter’s, because Ter is the club’s photographer, and he often gets to photograph events like this because Phii Hill requested him. Phii Hill is the club’s president, after all.

“Is he looking at the camera or the photographer? Seriously, he’s smiling so sweetly.” Kett teased, “Try smiling like that at someone else’s camera, there’d be people fainting all over the place.” “I’m embarrassed for Ter.” I said, “He’s not smiling at the camera but at the photographer, damn, it’s so embarrassing.” I couldn’t help but feel embarrassed remembering when Phii Hill was courting Ter in public. It made me really shy back then.

“It’s a shame Phii Joe isn’t walking. Otherwise, there’d be someone else following him around with a camera.” Kyu teased. I immediately turned to look at him, then the screams continued as Phii Fah walked by, holding a banner with a female senior. I couldn’t quite see what was on the banner.

“Phii Fah is also handsome, damn.” Skater remarked, “Are they choosing partners based on looks now? Seriously?”

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 29 part 2

“North, do you think I’m just imagining things?”

“Imagining what?”

“You look radiant.” Skater’s words made me raise my eyebrows and look at him with surprise. Right now, we were sitting under the school building because the teacher let us out early, and we didn’t know where else to go.

“What’s with the glow?”

“Maybe because he’s happier. After dating Phii Joe.” Kyu remarked.

“You guys are imagining it.” I said.

“Really? So, how’s dating going? Is your love life happy?” Skater asked.

“It’s good, really good.” I replied, inadvertently smiling after being together for a while. Everything has been great for me. When he’s not stressed about work, he becomes more playful, talks more, loves to tease and prank.

The important thing is…he’s never gentle with me, not even once. It’s almost like we have sex every day. I’m not sure if my body is getting used to it, because many times, after he’s been too intense, I wake up with a sore hip and a slight fever.

People used to say that Phii Johan was a flirt, even my mom said so. She mentioned that you could tell he was a flirt just by looking at him, but the way he looks at me is different, even my mom couldn’t explain it, but she trusts Phii Joe. I wonder if they’ve talked about something without me knowing.

As for part-time work, Phii Joe won’t let me do it, he says he’s worried. I don’t want him to worry, but I also don’t want to just depend on Phii Joe. The money I’m using now is from my savings, and it’s dwindling every day. Maybe I’ll find a chance to discuss work with him again.

“Yeah, there’s a basketball match tonight between the medical faculty and the engineering faculty.” Kyu said, “Who are you cheering for, North?”

“Huh. If I say I’m cheering for the medical faculty, would that look like I’m a traitor?” I asked jokingly.

“Traitor, just leave our faculty then.” Duennao teased.

“Do I have to leave the faculty for that? I’m not cheering for anyone, just there to show support.”

“Are Phii Hill and Phii Joe playing for the medical team?” Skater asked, “With that lineup, will they win? I’ve seen clips from their freshman year during the inter-faculty games, they played really well.”

“Our seniors are a bit scared.” Nao said, “I heard from the basketball club seniors that they’ve planned well to defend against Phii Hill and Phii Joe.”

“And what about your football team?” Kett asked Nao. The last time I watched, they nearly lost, but the medical faculty team was strong, or rather, Phii Arthit was really good.

“Almost died, Phii Arthit isn’t even human, that beast! At first, we thought after thirty minutes, he’d start tiring since we planned to go after him heavily, focusing on just him, but even an hour in, he was hardly tired, and they kept substituting him in and out.” Nao said, looking frustrated, “But you know, it’s a team sport.”

“Do you lose like this when it’s one-on-one too?” Kett asked.

“If it’s Tiger, it’s probably a close match. But how do you even play football?” Nao asked back.

“One person shoots, the other is the goalie.” I said, “But Tiger is good at playing, or else he wouldn’t be captain since the first year.”

“Yeah, he’s skilled, really skilled.” Kyu said. Kyu also plays football, “Has he been this good for a long time, Nao?”

“He’s good, so good it’s annoying. Since middle school, I guess.”

“You’ve been with him since middle school?” I raised my eyebrows in question.

“No, just saw him play. In high school, we got to know each other because we were in the same football club. He’s good enough to go national, maybe.” Duennao said, then picked up some snacks to eat, “But he said he doesn’t really want to pursue football that much. Ha, if the national team ever contacted me, I’d be all over it.”

At first, I thought Tiger and Nao had some issue or something, because that day Tiger was drunk and called me. But from what I see, there doesn’t seem to be anything, or maybe there is but they don’t show it to outsiders like me, and…

“Speaking of, when do doctors like them find time to practice sports? Both Phii Hill, Phii Joe, Phii Arthit, they’re all good at sports. Does Phii Fah play too?” Skater asked.

“Phii Fah is good at tennis, from what I saw in last year’s clips.” Kyu said, “But I heard from the pub that there’s trouble in the medical tennis club, and Phii Fah might quit.”

“Really?” I raised my eyebrows in question.

“It’s just rumors. I don’t know if he’ll really quit.”

“What’s the issue?”

“It’s probably the girls who manage the club having some dispute over Phii Fah. Otherwise, why would he want to leave?” Kyu offered his opinion. “Being handsome is tough.” Skater said with resignation, “But having a handsome boyfriend is tough too, right?” He then turned to tease me.

“Exactly, it’s tough, tough. Wherever you go, people stare. This is what happens when your boyfriend is too good-looking, isn’t it, North?” Kyu continued to tease.

“You guys like to tease me, don’t you ever get tired?”

“Nope, your face is funny.”

“Alright, whatever makes you guys feel better.” I said, resigned.

“Back to the topic, why are doctors good at sports? What’s up with that, North? Do they work out? They look like they’re in good shape.” Skater asked again.

“I’m working out too.” I said, nodding in agreement, “Phii Joe goes to the gym, runs in the morning too.” Whenever he has free time, he usually works out or goes for a run in the morning. How else would he keep such a good physique? And he makes me run too, my legs are sore all the time now.

“Phii Hill works out too, Ter told me.” I added.

“Does he have a six-pack?” Kett asked.

“Why do you have to blush answering that, North?” Duennao started teasing, “Ah, just tell Kett you see it every day.” Nao’s words made me slap his arm. Why tease so hard, Nao?

   “So, the answer is?”

“Yeah, he does.” I answered quietly.

“When do doctors find time to work out?” Kett asked.

“Well, everyone has to make time, right? Plus, working out is good for the brain, improves memory, so it helps with studying too, and it’s good for health. Otherwise, they’d just die from stress.” Kyu explained. I nodded in agreement.

After nearly half an hour of chatting and hanging out, I asked Duennao to drop me off at the gym where the basketball game was happening. Duennao wanted to watch too since he had no other plans. Meanwhile, Kyu and Skater went to watch a movie they had tickets for.

“Lots of people, man.” Nao remarked, scanning the crowd with his eyes. It was indeed very crowded, even for the university’s largest gym, making me wonder if I’d get a seat.

“Where should we sit?” I asked.

“Why don’t you go find your boyfriend first? There might be some empty spots around the court.”

“Okay.” I said, navigating through the noisy crowd. Normally, basketball games wouldn’t attract this much attention, but with Phii Hill and Phii Joe playing, it’s different. Look at all the cameras around. I recognized some of the photographers from various faculties; they’re definitely here to capture the match atmosphere for their pages.

Duennao and I made our way to the medical faculty’s side, spotting Phii Joe and Phii Hill in their medical faculty basketball uniforms talking with other team members and their coach, probably going over game strategies. I noticed Ter sitting nearby, so I walked over to him.

“Can I sit with you? Is there space?” I asked Ter.

“Sure.” Ter said, moving his bag to make room, “This is the athletes’ seating area. We’ll just have to squeeze a bit.”

“Have you been here long?”

“It’s been a while, just got out of class.” Ter said. After we separated rooms, I still see Ter often because he’s with Phii Hill, so whenever I visit Phii Joe at the faculty, I run into Ter too, “What about Kett and Kyu?”

“They went on a date. The couple wanted some alone time to be sweet together.”

“Oh, so they’re really dating?” Ter asked. “No, I was kidding.” I said, shaking my head slightly, “They just got a discount for two movie tickets, so they went together.”

“Oh, I see. Haven’t seen Nao much.” Ter said, turning to smile at Nao.

“Exactly, now that I’ve moved out from North’s room, I can’t go out as much.” Nao said, “But it’s for the best, moving out from North.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Feel sorry for good people like Ter, having to live with someone like you. Now Ter’s free from all the trouble.”

“Why? Ter loves being with me to death.” I turned to ask Ter.

“Uh, finally free from all the woes.” Ter’s words made Nao burst out laughing. Well, you two get along well, don’t you, “So, have you been behaving well with Phii Joe?”

“You ask like I’m a child.” I said.

“Do you dry your hair before sleeping? Don’t go to bed with wet hair.”

“North, you don’t dry your hair?” Nao made a face at me.

“I do dry it. When you’re not there to do it for me, I have to do it myself.” I said with resignation. I’m lazy when it comes to drying my hair. Normally, Ter would do it for me, “But it feels empty.”

“How so?” Nao asked.

“Normally, I clean the room, right? But when Phii Joe hires a housekeeper, I find myself free. I’m not used to it; it feels like something’s missing from my life.”

Because my mom made me do chores since I was young. If it was messy, I had to clean up quickly, or else I’d get scolded. So I developed a habit of being tidy. When I lived with Ter, I was always the first to clean, but now with Phii Joe, I hardly have to do anything, not even pay for rent, utilities.

“You don’t like being comfortable?” “Well, I like it, but I’m not used to it.” I said, “Hey Ter, can you ask Phii Hill for some work?” I asked, because Phii Hill seems easier to talk to than Phii Joe, so I told Ter to ask for some part-time work. If Phii Hill agrees, I might get a chance to work again.

“I asked. Phii Hill said no.”

“Come on, why?”

“He says he’s worried.” I said, looking annoyed when I got the answer from Ter.

“He won’t let you work, right?” Nao asked. I nodded in response, “Well, he can support you guys anyway.”

“It’s not like that, Nao.”

“I get it. You don’t want to be a burden, right?” Duennao said, “Then why don’t you just work for him instead?”

“How so?”

“Like, cleaning the house. You don’t need to hire a maid anymore, just hire you instead.” Nao’s suggestion caught my attention right away. That’s actually a good idea, I could ask for a salary the same as what the maids get.

After a while, Phii Joe came to sit next to me, and Phii Hill sat next to Ter.

“I think I made the right call coming here, love has completely blinded you guys.” Nao said, pretending to look like he wanted to cry. I wanted to tell him to go find Tiger instead, but I couldn’t say it.

“How’s it going?” I turned to ask Phii Joe.

“Tired, can we go back, Hill?”

“No, we play first.”

I glanced over at the engineering faculty’s side across the court, filled with familiar faces from both seniors and peers. As always, it was packed.

“Are you going to play soon?” I asked.

“In a bit.” “Who are you cheering for, North?” Phii Hill asked me, “Joe here is taking this very seriously.” I looked at the person next to me who just said he was tired.

“I said I can lose to anyone, but not to that bastard.”

“That guy?”

“Yeah.”

I looked a bit puzzled hearing what they were talking about, and Phii Joe seemed somewhat irritable. Observing the engineering team closely, I could guess why. Is Earth playing basketball too? Earth is a second-year senior in our faculty who talks to me sometimes, and Phii Joe doesn’t seem to like him much. So, I haven’t really interacted with Earth anymore.

Actually, Earth might not be after anything, but Phii Joe doesn’t like him, so I don’t really talk to him.

“Is he hitting on you?” Phii Hill asked.

“Not yet, but he’s annoying.” Phii Joe said, looking at Earth with a displeased expression, while Earth had been looking this way from the start.

“He likes your junior, doesn’t he?”

“Yeah.”

How do they know? Just by looking?

“How’s the fever?” Phii Joe asked.

“It’s gone now. I’m normal.” The other reached out to touch my forehead lightly before pulling back. If he’s worried about me, he should be gentle with me on the bed…

“If that’s the case, we can have more fun tonight.” Phii Johan leaned in close to whisper softly to me, making me immediately lean back a little, looking at him with a pout when I realized I was being teased again. Damn it, I really hate this sly smile of his.

“Uh…no, I can’t.” “Are you sure? You say that every day.” His deep voice whispered back, clearly pleased with my embarrassment.

“See, you like to tease.” I said, making a pouty face at him, turning away in embarrassment, because being too close made me move back a bit. Phii Joe really enjoys teasing me until I’m embarrassed, does he find it that amusing?

“Look this way.”

“Huh?”

“I want to kiss you.”

“Uh…no!”

“Look at me.”

“Phii! Are you crazy? There are so many people around.”

“Who cares?” Because the noise in the gym was loud, only I could hear Phii Joe’s soft whisper. I moved until I bumped into Ter, who seemed slightly startled, before Phii Joe pulled me back to him.

“Stop teasing, please.”

“No, just a little tease.” He said before leaning in closer. Normally, even when we’re alone, I’d feel a bit embarrassed, but being in such a crowded place made me really shy.

“No.”

Before the referee signaled for both teams to enter the court:

“Good luck.”

“What if I win, can I ask for something?”

“Huh?” I furrowed my brows in question, needing further explanation.

“Can I?”

“Oh, sure. But what is it?” Phii Joe didn’t answer my question. He stood up from his seat and walked down to the court. As both teams lined up to enter, the screams were deafening, forcing me to cover my ears because the gymnasium echoed with the noise.

The medical faculty’s basketball uniforms are pretty nice, with the faculty’s color and “Medicine” written on the back, along with each player’s number.

“Phii Joe’s basketball shoes are beastly.” Nao remarked, “Phii Hill’s are nice too. Since when did you start checking out other people’s shoes?”

“Probably got it from Tiger.” I said.

“Doesn’t he buy you shoes or clothes sometimes?”

“Nope, I refuse, but some things I do want.”

“You don’t accept them? He might actually want to give you stuff.” Nao said, “You don’t have to be too considerate, you’re dating, right? It’s okay to accept some things.”

“Would that be right?” I asked hesitantly.

“Yeah, I mean some things, when he genuinely wants to give.”

“Hmm, I’ll think about it.” I said, hearing the whistle signaling the start of the game. I immediately turned my attention to the court. At first, it wasn’t too exciting, but after a while, it was clear that Phii Joe and Phii Hill were indeed skilled players, each scoring a basket.

I just noticed that Earth was marking Phii Joe. Phii Joe gave him a displeased look before giving a mocking smile, stepped back one pace, and then shot from half court.

The whistle blew, followed by screams echoing throughout the gym. People sitting close by were screaming loudly for Phii Joe. Is everyone on this side just fans of the medical faculty? “You, you’re so skilled, how did you shoot from half the court?” Nao said excitedly, “It’s like you were annoyed by being marked by Phii Earth, so you just shot it. And quick, too, you barely took a stance.”

“Impressive, I just found out he’s this good at basketball.” I said, stunned. The game went on with both teams scoring intermittently, but the medical faculty was leading by a lot. Phii Hill and Phii Joe were doing most of the scoring, making them the primary targets of the other team, so they were closely marked by one or two players each, making it tougher to play.

Ten minutes passed, and the first quarter ended with the referee’s whistle, then came a break where they gathered around the coach to talk. After that, they went back on the court, and the cheering, shouting, and screaming were even louder. The match between the medical and engineering faculties was probably the most intense.

Phii Earth, who was still closely marking Phii Joe, started looking my way more often. I looked back, not fully understanding, but then looked away. The second quarter ended with the score getting closer, and Phii Joe began to show signs of fatigue.

When he’s like this, he looks so sexy…

Phii Joe wiped the sweat off his face with the hem of his shirt, revealing his beautifully defined abs, which prompted even louder screams from the crowd before he casually let his shirt fall back down.

“Scream, Dr. Joe, I want him, I want him, show us those six-packs again!”

“Dr. Hill, show us some too, I want to see!”

“You guys, when he’s all sweaty, he’s so damn sexy, I’m about to faint.”

“I love it when Dr. Joe brushes his hair back, so sexy, the epitome of hot, I surrender, I’ll offer myself as his wife.” “But they both have boyfriends, right? Both Phii Hill and Phii Joe, what a pity.” “I’ll be a fictional wife, I surrender. Really, I’ll do anything, please step on me.”

“Watch out, their partners are sitting right there.”

“Oh, crap, I guess I was speaking a bit too loudly.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle at the comments I heard. It happens a lot when the girls scream for Phii Joe, and then turn to see me sitting there. They get embarrassed. It seems like everyone in the university knows we’re dating. There are some who aren’t thrilled and grumble about it, but as I’ve said, I don’t really care.

“What good deeds did you do to deserve such boyfriends? I want one like that too.”

Teased again. Me and Ter could only turn and give each other shy smiles.

“I’ll take Phii Tit or Phii Fah, just one for me, can you share some of that good fortune?”

“How happy must you be with such a handsome boyfriend? Waking up to see him, going to sleep seeing him. When he says he loves you, it must feel heavenly.”

“Yeah, can I pay to just look at a doctor for an hour? If I were rich, I’d hire him to sit and smile at me, I’d go crazy just from his smile.”

“Which doctor?”

“Any of them, as if I can choose, but they’re all handsome, can I just take them all?”

I didn’t pay attention to the chatter from the upper stands when Phii Joe approached me with a neutral expression. Just looking at him, I could tell he was in a bad mood.

Uh-oh, what’s wrong?

“What’s the matter?” I asked concernedly.

“Why do you have to look at other people?” “Huh?” I furrowed my brows, looking puzzled at him. Phii Joe only said that before throwing a towel over my head. I pulled it off and looked back at him, “Were you looking?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, I didn’t mean to.”

“Just look at me.”

“Understand?”

“Yes.”

I nodded slightly to indicate I understood, then bowed my head to hide my blushing face. Phii Joe is very possessive, which I’ve never felt uncomfortable about; rather, I found it endearing.

The person in front of me walked away as it was time for the game to continue. Just watching, you could tell Phii Earth was no match for Phii Joe, barely able to keep up with him. The medical faculty kept scoring until they ultimately won.

“Did they win big?” Duennao asked.

“Seems like it.” I replied, “It’s sports day soon, are you lazy to go to the stands?”

“Come on, did your boyfriend get to walk in the parade?”

“I don’t know.” I shook my head, turning to look at the court where both teams were lined up, listening to the referee.

“But somehow I don’t want him to walk.” I muttered to myself, and no one heard it.

Then, Phii Joe and I went back to our room. He seemed very pleased with the win. I glanced over and saw Phii Earth looking quite displeased. I started to wonder if there was something between them.

“Phii Joe.” I called out to him after we got back to the room.

“Hm?” “Are you going to be in the parade for the Sports Day event?” “Why do you ask?” He said, pulling me to sit on his lap, a position he often likes. I’m not too fond of this because it usually leads to more than just sitting, “No. Just curious.”

“What if I said yes?”

“Really?” I asked, my face falling a bit, “Where in the parade? Holding a banner?”

“Yes.”

“For the faculty?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“With a girl?”

“Probably.” I immediately made a pouty face at him and lowered my head to hide my expression.

“Really?”

“What’s the matter?”

“…” I leaned my forehead against his shoulder, my hands gripping his shoulders, “I don’t know.”

“Hmm?”

“I don’t like it.”

“What’s wrong, my dear?”

“…”

His strong hands gently pulled me back to lift my chin, wanting us to make eye contact, but I avoided his gaze.

“Look at me.”

“You’re a cheater, I told you not to tease me.”

“I’m not just teasing, when I say I want to kiss, I really want to kiss.” before his lips pressed down on mine, kissing me intensely, his hot tongue intertwining with mine. I responded to the rhythm of the kiss, my heart starting to beat rapidly amidst the embarrassing sounds of our kissing. It went on for a while without stopping, then his large hands, growing restless, began to roam under my shirt, slowly unbuttoning it.

“No…no, you pervert.”

“Then can you tell me what’s wrong?”

“It’s just, today everyone was looking at you, everyone likes you, and you were even going to walk in the parade with someone else.”

“Are you jealous?”

“Yeah…jealous, very jealous.” My words brought a satisfied smile to his face, “I really don’t like it when others look at you.”

“Forget about the others, as long as you only looks at me, that’s enough.”

“Because I; Phii Joe only looks at my North too.”

I bit my lip tightly, feeling something tug at my heart because of those words. If he wasn’t only looking at me, he probably wouldn’t have noticed me looking at someone else, because it was just a fleeting glance and not intentional.

   And why should I care, anyway? Since Phii Joe’s eyes are only on me, and my eyes are only on him…

   “Okay.” I agreed, silently thanking him in my heart, even though he’s told me not to say thank you so often. Everything he does is on purpose for me, “Then, can you not walk in the parade with someone else?”

“Hmm?” He seemed to be waiting for me to do something, recalling the condition he mentioned earlier about asking for something. So, I leaned in to kiss him first.

“Mmm.” I pulled away from the kiss when I felt like I was running out of breath. I could tell my face must be bright red, my lips feeling a bit numb, “So, you won’t walk in the parade, right?” “Of course not.” “Yes, thank you.”

“Now, I want my reward for winning.” He said with a slight smile that made my heart skip a beat. I couldn’t trust that smile.

“Uh…what’s that?”

“Nothing much.”

“Just…”

“My North might not go to class tomorrow, that’s all.”

😉

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 29 part 1

   Chapter 29: Looking at You

   I glanced at the person in my arms who was still unwilling to wake up even though it was quite late. Their warm, steady breathing, the slight red mark I had left last night on the fair skin near the neck, barely visible above the shirt because I intended it to be subtle.

My little junior was resting on my arm, turned towards me, moving closer. He’s also very clingy, always wanting to be hugged. So, I tightened my embrace and gently kissed his forehead.

If anyone could see the look in my eyes right now,

they would know how deeply I’m in love with him.

We’ve been dating for a while now, and everything is perfect. Seeing him move around the room, making breakfast in the morning, going to classes together, and returning home together, calling this our room. We kiss every time we’re about to separate and every time we reunite, it’s a sign of how much we miss each other.

He’s the only one I want to see smiling often. I love his laugh, the way his eyes look when he smiles, he truly brings me so much happiness with his personality, thoughts, and even his playful words. Even though he can be a bit mischievous,

it’s all part of who he is.

The person who has made me fall in love over and over again for years.

I’ve always believed that the most captivating thing is one’s attitude.

He isn’t an optimist, but he looks at the world as it is. I love that he always waits to hear from me first, no matter what he might have heard from others, he’ll ask and tell me straightforwardly what happened, just as he explains everything to me directly, no matter the topic.

Regarding my past, I admit it’s not something good. He says he doesn’t think much of it; as long as I’m only with him now, that’s enough. And I can see he really doesn’t dwell on it. He’s never asked to check my phone, not even once. I think he probably doesn’t think about it at all. But even if he did ask, there’s nothing to see, just my phone’s background set to his picture.

And his easygoing and simple nature is what makes everyone want to be around him; that’s why he’s my peace of mind. What I also like is that he chooses my peace of mind above all else. He told me, (that he had blocked his ex on LINE from the moment he realized he was starting to like me. If he knows it makes me uncomfortable when someone approaches him, he won’t engage with that person again, and he makes it clear to everyone that he’s taken.)

“It’s okay, I choose your peace of mind over everything, Phii Joe.”

That was his response after I asked if he felt restricted by my being overly protective.

And I like it when he gets jealous of me, like that time at the bar with James, but if it happens too often, it wouldn’t be that great. I used to be quite the flirt, never turning away beautiful people who approached me, which often got me scolded by Hill for my inability to say no to women. But now, I don’t pay attention to anyone else. I choose to reject everyone to keep one person.

The matter of introducing him to my family is the same, it shows how serious he is about us. Since we started dating, he’s become more clingy, more attentive, and tends to think of me first in many situations I’ve noticed, and with all that cuteness, I really can’t go anywhere.

I reached out to gently stroke his hair, moving down to the red marks that indicate what happened last night. Last night was another time I realized that with him, I can never get enough. I’m not sure if I couldn’t control myself or if that was me controlling myself the most. If he hadn’t passed out first, it might not have ended there.

And it seems like I still want more and more, but I’ll have to wait a bit longer, for his body to get more used to it.

“Uh…” He made a soft noise in his throat, slowly waking up with a groggy look. When he saw me watching, he quickly averted his gaze and tried to turn away, but I hugged him first.

“What’s wrong?”

“…Uh, I don’t want to talk to you.”

“Why?” I teased in a low voice after leaning my face close to his. His face started to turn red a bit before he buried his face into my chest.

“Mean person.”

“Hmm?”

“You’re mean.”

“Am I mean?”

“Yeah.”

“But last night, the one who asked me to…” I fell silent when suddenly his small hand reached out to cover my mouth, stopping me from continuing.

“Uh…stop, no teasing.”

“…”

I didn’t respond, just took his hand, gently kissing his fingers and the back of his hand, glancing at him as I often do. I don’t know what kind of look I have when I look at him, probably one of someone very much in love, and I feel like I can’t look away at all.

He, on the other hand, can’t handle my gaze and always looks away first.

The other person bit their lip slightly, as they often do when trying to hide their embarrassment, and quickly pulled their hand back.

“Phii Joe…”

And there’s something else I love,

when he calls my name.

“Yes?” I answered, giving a slight smile, then leaned in close, pressing my lips softly against his. He responded to the touch, but the kiss was just a brief touch of lips before I pulled away.

“Have you been awake for long?”

“Hmm, for a while now.”

“What time is it? I have class.” He said, suddenly looking alarmed as if he just remembered, “I’m going to miss the attendance check, this is bad.”

“Can you make it in time?” I asked, my question making him pout immediately.

“See, you’re mean. I told you I have class.”

“Is that so? I didn’t seem to remember that.” I said, not too concerned, sitting up on the bed following him. It looks like he’s sore again. It happens every time we have sex. Even though his body is getting used to it, it probably doesn’t hurt as much as before, but last night I might have been a bit too rough.

I pulled him into a hug and started kissing his cheek, moving down to his neck to take in his faint scent. He was slightly startled by my actions. I find his embarrassed reactions when I touch him so endearing, and I find it even more so when, despite being very embarrassed, he still tries to kiss or peck me back.

“Good morning.” He said softly, with a bit of a shy demeanor, leaning in to kiss my cheek, then revealing a sweet smile. How can someone be so adorable in every way…

I dropped him off at the engineering faculty before driving back to the medical school. I was a bit worried because he seemed to have a slight fever. Even though it wasn’t severe and he insisted he was fine, with North, you can never really trust that he’s ‘fine.’ And I’m aware that sometimes I might get a bit too intense. Next time, I’ll try to control myself better.

I walked into the classroom, just in time it seemed, as the professor was also entering.

“Not late today?” Fah turned to ask as soon as I sat down next to him.

“Not late, my little junior has class.”

“If your junior doesn’t have class, you won’t leave the room, right?” Arthit, who had his head slumped on the table, looked up to tease me. I shrugged, not paying much attention.

I didn’t intend to become a doctor in the first place. Even if I graduate, I won’t work as one because I’m better suited to the family business, which pays better too. So I didn’t care much about studying, but because it’s this faculty, if I didn’t put in any effort at all, I wouldn’t make it. And the coursework has been getting tougher, to the point where I had to ask for some time off from the family business, otherwise, I definitely wouldn’t graduate.

The teacher lectured for about an hour before excusing himself for some business, leaving us with work to do.

“There’s a match today. Did you bring your jersey?” Hill asked me after we gathered as a group.

“I brought it.”

“Is it basketball?” Fah asked. I nodded in response, “Against which faculty?” “Engineering.” I answered. It’s during the sports day period where each faculty takes turns to compete. Today there’s a basketball match between the medical faculty and the engineering faculty, “How can we possibly win?”

“Why can’t we?”

“Ask Arthit.” I said, and Arthit immediately looked annoyed because just the other day, our medical faculty football team had lost to engineering.

“Ha, it’s ridiculous.” Arthit sighed, “I was exhausted, bastard. I was already panting, but the other side looked so relaxed.”

“Poor thing.” I said, genuinely feeling sorry for him. No matter how good Arthit is, since it’s a team sport, being good alone makes it tough.

“Why, I didn’t go watch.” Fah asked.

“Their bench has a hundred players. When they get tired, they just substitute in fresh players. Then look at the med school bench.” Arthit said, clearly not in the best mood, “They focus on numbers, damn it.”

Because engineering is the largest faculty, there are a lot of skilled players. And as Arthit mentioned, they can keep substituting players, which was most evident during the football match when Arthit played, prolonging the game to their advantage.

“Is basketball the same, like last year?” Arthit asked.

“Yeah, I heard. The seniors were complaining.” Hill said.

“Let’s throw in the towel, Joe.” I immediately turned to look at Arthit when I heard that, then burst out laughing.

“Use money to solve the problem?” I asked while still laughing, “Interested, Hill?”

“You’re good at just one thing.” I shrugged, not paying much attention, “And you got beaten by that kid?” I turned to ask Arthit because that kid, Tiger, also plays football and has been the captain since his first year.

“Damn, just saying his name makes my blood boil.” Arthit said irritably, “It felt like getting stepped on the face.”

“That bad?”

“Yeah, our faculty is packed with people, but it’s a miracle to even get enough people to join the team.”

“But you can still switch according to the rules, right? It’s not like it happens often.” Hill remarked.

“True, but our faculty is…you understand, right?” Arthit paused for a moment, as it’s quite an intense course, so not many care about extracurriculars or sports. It’s not surprising, really, only a few of us are juggling both activities and studies.

“Ah, but don’t count me in, I don’t want to deal with both.” I added, because I didn’t want the hassle of both.

“Yeah, I’ve quit the tennis club.” Fah announced. I turned to look at him with a slightly surprised expression, remembering he had mentioned some issues within the club.

“You quit?” I asked.

“Hmm, it might be the best way out.”

“Why?” Arthit inquired.

“The girls were arguing over you, Fah.” I said, recalling from when Fah had come to me for a bit of advice. Even though Fah still looked somewhat confused, I figured it was about this, “You’re just too nice to everyone.”

“Wow, those words coming out of Joe’s mouth.” Arthit teased, “Can a family man say anything now?”

“Absolutely, I can say whatever I want now.” I said, raising an eyebrow at them. “In the past, Hill almost had to take migraine medication.” Fah said, “He was complaining about you every day, Joe.”

“Hmm? Complaining means you were missing me, Hill?”

“Yeah, whatever.” Hill said with a sigh. I liked it when the usually quiet Hill slipped up, “And what does that look mean?”

“Can’t I look at you?” I playfully looked at Hill with the same gaze I used to give to girls when I was still a flirt, giving a slight, habitual smile.

“Hill?”

“What?” Hill looked up from his sheet and back at me, his eyes sharp with a hint of displeasure.

“…”

“…”

“I get why people ship Hill with Johan now, you beast.” Arthit said, holding his temples and laughing, “Joe, you’re such a flirt, just a look in your eyes tells it all.”

“You’re ridiculous.” Hill said, shaking his head in disgust, “Go do something else.”

“Do what?” I asked.

“Anything you want to do, just do your work.” He said, sliding some papers towards me.

“If I say I want to look at you like this?”

“…”

“That’s ridiculous, and you just teased Hill again.” Fah laughed out loud, “I’m about to board the Hill and Johan ship.”

“Don’t, Fah, I don’t like it.” I said, turning to him.

“You don’t like shipping Hill with Johan?”

“I don’t like my name being tacked on at the end.” I said, chuckling a bit. Honestly, I didn’t like this random shipping either, it was just to tease Hill.

“Spreading to Hill now.” Arthit said, also laughing.

“Sigh.” Hill let out a small sigh, clearly annoyed with me, but he must be used to it by now. “When you’re in such a good mood, you’re annoying, Joe. Why don’t you go do some work?”

“I’ve been teasing you since our freshman year. Don’t you ever give in?”

“…”

“I could take care of you for life, you know.”

“Joe…sigh.” Hill sighed heavily. I laughed at his reaction. Nothing is more fun than teasing Hill. “Why would anyone stay with someone like you?”

“Because our friend is so smitten, where would he go?” Arthit teased, “If he doesn’t have class, he won’t leave the room, so smitten with you, huh?”

“If you point at a bird and say it’s a bird, I’d believe you. If you point at a dog and say it’s a crocodile, I’d believe that too.”

“Enough, you beast.” Arthit said, drawing out the word, “I’ll pile up money for you.”

“True.” I agreed, “Hey, Hill.”

“Yeah?”

“Is Ter the same?”

“What do you mean?”

“He won’t take anything I try to buy for him, he won’t tell me what he wants, he wants to save up to buy things himself, and he’s always fussing about wanting to work.”

“He’s like that, is North the same?” Hill asked back.

“Are we entering the ‘househusbands’ counseling session’?” Arthit teased.

“Why is it like that?” I turned to ask Hill. “Probably out of consideration.”

“Why be considerate? I want to give, but he won’t take it.”

“I don’t know.” Hill said with a slight shake of his head, “Ter is like that too. Don’t know why he’s so considerate.”

“So what do you do?”

“They’re just being considerate of you guys.” Fah chimed in, “They don’t want to trouble or burden you. They’re not dating you for your money.”

“It really goes against the sugar daddy vibe like Joe here.” Arthit said.

“Yeah, I want to give everything, if he wants something, I’ll find it for him, but the only thing he ever asks for is a Seven-Eleven stamp.” I said, feeling a bit frustrated. It’s almost the only thing he asks for from me, I remember when we go shopping, he always asks for the stamp. It’s cute, but doesn’t he want anything else?

“Adorable.” Fah commented.

“Shut up.”

“You’re quite possessive.”

“Yeah.”

“How’s it going living together?” Fah asked, “What’s Nong North like? Do you ever get mad or sulk at each other? He seems so laid back.”

“What kind of person is he?” I repeated the question, pausing to think, “I think he’s someone without much substance.”

“That’s what this bastard thinks of him too.”

“Really, he’s easygoing, laughs easily, tells his own jokes, and laughs at them. Even at five baht or ten baht jokes, I’d laugh, out of fondness.” I said, reminiscing about the times we spent together. When he’d tell a joke and I didn’t laugh, he’d say, ‘Oh, you’re not laughing?’ but then he’d laugh by himself for a bit.

“Has he ever gotten angry at you?” “Never, I think it would be hard. I’d have to do something like being with someone else.” I said honestly. He’s never been angry with me, and I haven’t done anything to make him angry either. But if I were to make him angry, I’d have to do something really wrong, which I wouldn’t do.

“And he doesn’t get angry at others? Has he never been mad?” Fah asked, surprised.

“He gets angry, I’ve seen it.” I said, “Probably when playing games, he gets really heated.” He gets easily frustrated over games, often seen getting upset while playing. But when I approach him, he cheers up.

“And with people he’s not close to?”

“Sometimes, he’s just a normal person. And why do you care so much about my partner, Fah?”

“Such a jealous type, you used to tease Hill about Ter to make him angry. How is it now?” Arthit teased again. I raised an eyebrow at that before the conversation at the table drifted to other topics.

“Write this for me, Fah.” Arthit said, passing some documents to Fah.

“Write it yourself.”

“My hand hurts.” Arthit said, raising his left hand which had been bitten by piranhas in Brazil. I still find it funny every time I see it, especially since he used a medical certificate from the incident as an excuse to skip classes. Even if he didn’t skip all classes, he still had to make up for it or miss a lot of days anyway.

“Use your other hand then.”

“I’m not ambidextrous like you.”

“Sigh.” Fah sighed slightly before taking the paper from Arthit to write for him, “Hey Joe, what about the sports day money scam?”

“I don’t know, ask Hill. Weren’t you the one handling it?” I turned to ask. “The person who scammed the sports day money is exactly who you thought, Joe.”

“I figured.” I said, not too surprised. Scamming the sports day money isn’t hard to pinpoint; it’s much harder to find the culprits within the company.

“But you didn’t pursue it, so the faculty handled it by expelling him and they’ll get the money back. But since he already spent it all, the faculty will cover the remaining amount, and beyond that, it’s up to the law.” Hill explained while still bent over his work, writing.

“You really won’t pursue it?” Fah asked.

“Nah, too lazy to go to court.”

“Joe.” I turned towards the voice calling my name, seeing it was a female friend from our faculty named Bai Toey.

“What’s up?”

“I want Joe to join the sports day parade, are you free?”

“Get Hill and Fah to do it.”

“Hill and Fah are already in as the faculty leader and vice-leader, they have to walk anyway. But we need more people, so I was hoping Joe could join too. Are you free? You’d walk with me.”

“I’m not free.” I replied straightforwardly.

“He just wants to linger around the engineering faculty.” Arthit teased.

“Really? Your boyfriend is in the engineering faculty, right?” Bai Toey said, her expression visibly darkening before she glanced at the bracelet on my wrist, “This one is serious, isn’t he? You keep posting about him in your stories.”

“Hmm.”

“Oh…what about Arthit, are you free?”

“Not free, I have to go as an athlete representative to receive an award.”

“For second place.” I teased, earning a scolding from Arthit. “So, no one’s free? What a pity.”

“Sorry about that.” I said out of courtesy.

“It’s okay.” Bai Toey said with a faint smile before walking away. I turned back, not too concerned, but since Fah was sitting across from me, he noticed.

“She’s crying.”

“Is she?” I asked, glancing over slightly to see Bai Toey crying on a friend’s shoulder outside, “Because I mentioned my boyfriend is in the engineering faculty, and I am in a serious relationship with him.”

“Well, you told the truth.”

“Toey has liked you since the first year.” Fah said, “Because you gave her hope.”

“Me? When was that?” I asked, trying to remember, but then decided it was better not to try too hard. I probably wouldn’t remember anyway, especially since I barely remember names of people outside my close circle.

“Probably during the first-year lab, Toey broke something in the lab, and you paid for the damage, it was like ten thousand baht.”

“Really?” I raised my eyebrow in question.

“Who wouldn’t like that, you’re such a spender.” Arthit said, “Why did you pay at that time? It wasn’t because you were good-hearted, was it?”

“Oh, if I really paid, then I…yeah.” I said, letting out a chuckle. No need to say it out loud to understand the implication. Why would I pay if I didn’t expect anything in return?

“And it didn’t work out?”

“Arthit.” Fah said in a low, cautionary tone.

“You mean you didn’t end up dating?”

“Probably not.” I said, shaking my head slightly, “Must have talked and found out it wouldn’t work, I don’t like people who make things worse when you talk to them, it’s a headache, like Hill’s Thanmild.” “She’s not mine.” Hill retorted immediately.

“Now it’s Fa’s.” I said. Thanmild is a second-year medical student who has liked Hill since high school and followed him here to study. She’s the type that gives you a headache just by being around, dunno how Hill puts up with her.

“Not mine.”

“Are you sure, Fah?” I raised an eyebrow, “I see you with her often.”

“She just comes to consult.”

“Oh, is that so?”

♣♣♣

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 28 part 2

“Who is that? He’s so handsome.”

“He’s my boyfriend.”

“Huh? Really? And that black Audi is his?”

I nodded in response, “Which means he must be very rich. He’s good, North. He’s really good, heh, and so handsome. Plus, he looks great, has a good body, and he’s rich too. I’m so jealous.”

I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know what to say, just gave a shy smile back. Honestly, I like it when people compliment Phii Joe; it somehow makes me feel shy too.

Then, Cartoon bombarded me with questions about Phii Joe. She even wanted to take a picture of him, but I wouldn’t let her. What would she do with a picture?

“North…”

“Yes?” I turned towards Phii Johan’s call, it seemed he had finished his business call. He walked over to me, and Cartoon looked all excited and flushed seeing Phii Joe up close.

“Uh, hello, are you North’s boyfriend?”

“Yes.”

“I’m North’s neighborly sister, my name is Cartoon.”

“Oh…yes.” Phii Joe gave a small smile but didn’t seem too interested in her. “Excuse us.” before he reached out to put his arm around my shoulder, leading me back into the house. I gave a small smile to Cartoon as a goodbye gesture.

Once inside, I found my mom setting up the dining table. We waited a bit until everything was ready, then we started eating dinner. I really missed Mom’s cooking. While we ate, we chatted about various things until Mom remembered something.

“Oh right, Young North, you’re such a show-off when it comes to his boyfriend.”

“Mom, please don’t.” I protested loudly. Since I started dating Phii Joe, I’ve been bragging about him to Mom all the time, it’s been like this for a while now. But the one thing I didn’t want to happen was for Mom to tell Phii Johan about it.

“Really?” Phii Joe asked with interest, “What did he say?”

“He said his boyfriend is very handsome.”

“Is that so?” The person next to me turned to ask me, revealing a slight smile. I quickly looked down and continued eating.

“It’s not just that…”

“Mom!” I started to whine a bit, making a pouty face, but it didn’t have any effect.

“He called to tell me, he’s so kind, he’s so attentive, he doesn’t know what to do, he loves him so much, you know…”

“Mom…” I called out in a hushed tone, this is why I didn’t really want them to meet. But it seems like Phii Joe enjoyed hearing mom’s stories, he was very interested.

“Do you know, mom, he’s the first person that made me want to better himself, I will study hard now too, and when we’re not together, I feel something weird, I don’t like it, I miss him so much, I’ve never felt like this with anyone else, have you ever felt like this with dad?” “Mom…I won’t tell you anything anymore.” I said, pretending to be sulky, covering my face with my hands, feeling the heat reaching my ears now.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

“Phii…”

“Here, North, why don’t you tell him these things?”

“Mom…” Who would dare tell Phii Joe these things? Because of the habit of talking about everything with mom. When I was dating Jo, I talked like this with mom too, but she never told Jo these things.

“Go ahead, say you’ve even thought about marriage.”

“Mom…”

“Hmm?” Phii Joe raised an eyebrow slightly, “Marry me?” before giving a satisfied half-smile. Who let him smile like that!

“…”

“North gets embarrassed, doesn’t he?” Mom teased lightly, “Or is it just with him? Your ears are all red now, dear.”

“I don’t want to talk anymore.” I said quietly.

“North, he is quite the one to show off his boyfriend, I’ll tell you, especially with Joe.” Mom said, turning to Phii Joe, “He bragged about everything, seems to be very proud of you, huh?”

“…” I continued eating my rice, trying to ignore them. They can tease all they want. I feel like I’m about to explode!

After dinner, mom said she’d clear the dishes herself and told us to go rest. My bedroom is upstairs. I opened the door to my room, feeling embarrassed. I never thought Phii Joe would actually agree to sleep in my room.

“It’s a bit cramped.” I mentioned.

“Not that cramped.” “Just me here.” I mumbled. Phii Joe walked in and scanned the room with his eyes, a typical boy’s room with posters, comic books, a guitar, a study desk, and a bed that wasn’t particularly large, “Do you want to take a shower?”

“Shower together?”

“N…no.” I immediately declined. He gave a small smile at my shy demeanor, and then we went to take our showers separately since there were bathrooms both upstairs and downstairs. When I came back to the room, he had already finished his shower and was sitting on the bed.

“Ah!” I exclaimed in surprise as I was suddenly pulled into a hug from behind. Phii Johan tightened his embrace and nuzzled his nose against my neck.

I caught the faint scent of soap from him as I leaned back against his chest.

“Phii Joe, are you okay with my home?”

“It’s okay.”

“That’s good, Mom and Aunt seem to really like you.” I said with joy, snuggling closer to him, “They might end up loving you more than me. What if I am left behind?”

“And you, North?”

“Huh?”

“Do you love me?”

“Uh…why are you asking that out of the blue?” I asked, stammering a bit, surprised by the sudden question.

“Answer.”

“I love you.”

“Hmm.”

“Just you; North loving me is enough.”

“…” I fell silent and let my heart continue to beat strongly. I’ve grown quite accustomed to and fond of Phii Joe’s hugs and physical affection, because it warms my heart a lot, but even so, it still makes me shy.

“I heard you’re a show-off.”

“…”

“When we’re not together, do you miss me a lot? Have you ever felt like this with anyone else?”

“Phii!”

“He’s the first one who made me want to change for the better.”

“…” I buried my face into the blanket to hide my flushed face. Why does he have to tease me and then whisper in my ear, stop it already, T^T.

“It’s the same for me.”

“Ha?”

“North, you are the first and only person who made me want to better myself.”

“…Ah, uh, yes.” I buried my face even deeper into the blanket, my words barely audible before Phii Joe pulled me closer, pressing his lips hard against my cheek, lingering there until I didn’t know what to do, “Ah…what’s this?”

“You let Gene kiss your cheek.”

“…I always let you kiss my cheek too.”

Phii Joe didn’t reply, just smiled with satisfaction and kissed my cheek again, holding it there for a moment before letting go. I turned to kiss his cheek in return, and we continued talking about today’s visit to my house along with other things.

Suddenly, my phone rang, and I saw it was Tiger calling.

“Speakerphone.” Phii Joe said in a calm voice, which made me jump a little. It seemed like he didn’t like it much when we were together and someone interrupted.

“What’s up, Tiger?” I answered, putting the call on speaker as instructed. (Duennao…)

   I was startled by the noise of music and commotion coming from the other end, I barely had time to lower the volume. It sounded like he was outside, probably at a bar, I guessed.

(Duennao…)

   “Are you drunk?”

(No.)

   “Oh, what’s going on then?”

(Duennao…)

   “If you keep just calling for Nao, how am I supposed to understand anything?”

(Duen…Nao…)

   “I can’t take it anymore, my friend.” I said, letting out a sigh. There must be something wrong for Tiger to be this drunk, “Calm down, man.”

(I don’t want to be like this at all.)

   “What’s wrong with you?” Phii Joe asked in a low, deep voice that gave me goosebumps. I don’t know why.

(Oh, you’re there too?)

   “Yeah.”

(That’s good, you’re together.)

   “Tiger, what’s going on?” I asked again.

(I don’t know, just leave me alone.)

   “Come on, but you called.”

(Yeah, Phii.)

“What?”

(That bastard North owes me money, Phii.)

   “…” (He swindled me out of hundreds of thousands, North, he threatened me really well about Duennao.)

   “This is ridiculous, Tiger, what would I threaten you with? You’re just drunk and talking nonsense.” I said with frustration. What is he on about, owing him hundreds of thousands?

(I don’t know, Field, get me more drinks.)

   (Annoying, and who did you call?) Garfield’s voice, a friend of Tiger, probably out drinking with him.

(Drunk and just talking shit, bastard.)

   There you go, sounds just like me.

(Is this North?) Garfield’s voice got closer to the phone, he must have successfully taken the phone from Tiger.

(Sorry about that, Tiger’s a bit drunk.)

   “Is it about Nao?” I asked.

(Must be it, it’s all messed up. Don’t know what happened.)

   “Okay, take good care of him when you bring him back.”

(Yeah, sorry for the disturbance) and then he hung up. What was that about? When it comes to Duennao, Tiger gets so delicate.

“Are you going to fleece him?” The deep voice from behind startled me again, before Phii Joe made me turn around to face him and sat me on his lap.

This isn’t good at all…

“Tiger is just drunk.”

“But you do fleece him, right?”

“Well…yes.” I admitted with a slight pout. It’s not really fleecing, just asking him to treat me to some drinks or something.

“I’m curious, how scary are you to threaten him to get hundreds of thousands?”

“…” “Come on, show me how you do it.”

“Are…are you crazy?” I said, turning my gaze away, looking at him with an expression that clearly showed he was deliberately trying to embarrass me.

“Quick, I want to see.”

“I don’t really fleece money from him, just asks him to buy water or something sometimes.” I said truthfully. I’ve never outright asked for money from Tiger.

“And why don’t you ever ask me?”

“…”

I fell silent because I felt the situation was getting tricky after seeing the smile at the corner of his mouth.

“What did you say before? That you could get anything you want from me, right?”

“Well…um, I’m considerate of you, you know, oh!” His hand pressed the back of my neck down, and his lips met mine instantly. Phii Joe seemed not too fond of my being considerate, then his hot tongue darted in, pressing against my lips firmly. I responded to the touch, my breathing starting to get faster, before Phii Joe pulled back from the kiss.

“What did you say just now?”

“No…no.” I averted my gaze, feeling my heart start to beat faster again.

“Do you understand?”

“I understand.”

“Hmm. That’s good.”

“But next time, I won’t ask.”

“Hmm?”

“I will just steal, when you’re asleep, I’ll steal your wallet, I’ll even take your room keys, the TV, the fridge, the sofa, all your expensive stuff, I will take it all. And when you wake up, I will have vanished without a trace.” I said with a playful smile, and the person in front of me responded with an indulgent smile.

“Will you disappear too?”

“Yes. You definitely won’t find me.”

“Then take it all, but North, don’t disappear.”

Cheater…

   Why are you so good at sweet-talking…

   I immediately pouted when I heard his words, my face suddenly feeling hot, I knew it must be turning red. I lowered my head to hide it. Phii Joe seemed quite pleased with my reaction.

   “Why are you so good at getting embarrassed?”

“It’s because of you. Don’t tease.”

“Then why are you so good at being cute?”

!!

“Uh…stop it.” I protested a bit before Phii Joe made me sit up and kissed me gently on the lips. When he pulled back, I rested my forehead on his shoulder as if needing a moment to catch my breath.

“Oh, right, do you want to hear me play the guitar?” I asked, remembering. I had always thought if there was a chance, I’d like to play the guitar for Phii Joe once, especially a song I would sing for him.

“Will you play?”

“Yes, but I’m not very good at it.”

“Hmm, I want to listen.” Phii Joe said. I gave a wide smile before getting up to fetch the guitar leaning against the wall, “Since when have you been playing?”

“Since high school, actually, but it’s been a while since I’ve played.” I said, strumming the guitar strings to check if they were out of tune, “There’s one song I’d like you to hear, by the way.” “What song?”

“‘Fix You,’ but, um, I can’t play it.”

“That’s okay, you have been wanting me to listen to that for a long time.”

“What do you mean?” I looked puzzled by his words, but Phii Joe didn’t seem too keen on explaining further, “If that’s the case…consider that I have played it for you, even if I’m not actually singing it.”

“Hmm, play another song then.”

“Oh, let’s go with an easy one then, just a moment, let me find one.” I said, pulling out my phone to search for a song that was both pretty and easy to play, “Come to think of it, we never had a proper courtship moment, so North will sing a song to court you.”

“Hmm?” Phii Johan raised an eyebrow, surprised by my words, then let out a small laugh, making me laugh along, even though I was embarrassed by what I said.

“What are you laughing at?”

“Let’s hear it then, I’m eager to listen to your courtship song.”

“I’ll make you blush, just watch.” I said, chuckling again at my own words. Being together for a while now, I’ve started to feel more confident joking around like this with him.

I found a song I thought was easy to play and fitting, though I haven’t played for a long time, I was worried I might mess up the chords, so I checked the lyrics and chords on my phone several times.

“Found a song?”

“Yep.”

“Which one?”

“‘Everything Has Changed,’” I said. I already liked this song, and when you look at its meaning, it fits, feeling like everything has changed since meeting him. I started to play somewhat awkwardly because I was out of practice, but after a while, it got better.

While I was playing, I looked up from the guitar to see Phii Johan holding his phone, recording me. I gave a small laugh to the camera.

“…Please don’t record.” I said, but he didn’t stop filming.

I played on with a slightly annoyed look until I finished the song.

“Posted on Instagram, have you?” After we started dating, Phii Joe has been posting on his Instagram stories more often, mostly about me. The news of us dating had spread throughout the university. But since I’m not one to care much about comments, I let them talk.

As for the people who added me or sent messages, I didn’t pay them any mind either. Whenever I went out, I often got strange looks, but I didn’t care about that either.

“Yeah, posted it.”

I checked to see what he posted, and found a story video of me playing the guitar just now, with the caption, “Someone said they’d play guitar to woo me: )”

I couldn’t help but smile when I saw that, it was really cute.

Phii Joe’s Instagram used to be all black and white from the very first post, but recently it’s turned to color, and mostly it’s pictures of me. If not my pictures, it’s photos related to us, like hand-holding, gifts we’ve given each other, or places we’ve been together.

I really like this kind of thing…

The latest picture was of me playing the guitar, with the caption from a line in the song:

‘Making Up For Lost Time…’

   “Can I post some photos too?” I asked.

“Sure. No need to ask.” “Can I hold your hand for a moment?” I smiled. Phii Joe extended one hand towards me, not quite understanding. I took a photo of us holding hands, with the guitar resting on my lap visible as well.

I posted the photo on my own Instagram, adding a caption from another part of the song:

‘All my walls stood tall, painted blue

   I’ll take them down, and open up the door for you.’

  

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 28 part 1

   Chapter 28: Painted Blue

   I felt a bit excited about bringing Phii Johan to my house. By the time we arrived, it was almost evening. My house is nothing special, not big or spacious. Within the same compound, there are two houses: the front one where I live with my mom, and the back one where my aunt lives, separated because they live as a family with Uncle. They have an older son in middle school named Knight, and the youngest son, Non, who was just born.

Initially, I thought we’d stop by to see Phii Joe’s grandparents first since we were staying at my place, but it seemed like his grandparents weren’t home. Mother Gene had come to see Phii Joe this morning, bringing gifts for my mom. Before leaving, she gave me a big kiss on the cheek, saying if I was going to meet Grandpa and Grandma, it would be better to meet Joes’Dad too at the same time.

So, it turns out next time I’ll meet Grandpa, Grandma, and Dad all at once.

Just thinking about it made me feel like I couldn’t breathe properly.

But above all else, I’m curious about how Mom will react when she meets Phii Joe. I haven’t even sent Mom a picture of him, thinking it’s better for them to meet in person.

The luxury car pulled up in front of the house. I got out and rang the doorbell, and after a moment, my mom came out looking like she had just finished showering, still with a towel draped over her shoulders.

“Oh, North, back home?” Mom called out, looking quite surprised.

“Isn’t that what you told me to do, to come back on Saturday?”

“Oh, did I say that?” I couldn’t help but think, why is Mom so forgetful? Before she walked over to open the gate, “Whose car is that? Why is there such a fancy car parked in front of our house?”

“It’s Phii Joe’s car. Mom, you said to bring my partner home. How could you forget?”

“…”

My mom’s eyes widened as she looked at the black car parked in front of us. Then the luxury car drove in and parked inside. Our house has space for two cars, one for my uncle, and the other spot was empty.

“Wow, how many millions is this car worth?” Mom walked up to me and asked. I shook my head slightly, indicating I didn’t know, “When Uncle takes his car out, he’ll have to be careful. If it gets scratched, what will we do?” Uncle is my aunt’s partner.

His car…? Then my mom froze when she saw Phii Johan stepping out of the car, she covered her mouth with her hand before a soft exclamation escaped.

“Wow, holy…”

“Mom…” I couldn’t help but chuckle a bit at her words. That’s just how my mom is, very youthful, you can tell from the end of the alley who my mother is.

“Fucking-Handsome-st, North, hold me or I might fall.”

“Take it easy.” I said, catching her arm, pretending to hold her up. But when Phii Joe turned around, she immediately composed herself and draped her towel over my shoulder instead.

Wait a minute, Mom…this towel is wet.

“Hello.” Phii Joe greeted with a wai. My mom responded with a stiff wai, why is she so stiff? He should be the one nervous about her, “Mom asked me to bring this.” and he handed her a beautiful blue paper bag. I didn’t know what was inside either, but from Gene, it’s bound to be something special.

“Thank you, really, you didn’t have to go through the trouble.” She smiled sweetly, taking the bag. Then we all walked into the house and sat down in the living room on the sofa.

“North, come help me a bit.” Mom called out. I walked into the kitchen to assist her, “What snacks should we get? Does he have any favorites?”

“He doesn’t like sweets, but I do, let’s go with that.”

“I am not even letting you have any.”

“Oh, come on.” I pouted, looking annoyed.

“North.”

“Yes?”

“Why is your boyfriend so handsome? Is he really your boyfriend, not just some playboy?” My mom was still visibly excited since meeting Phii Johan for the first time, “Mom’s heart is really fluttering.” She said, placing her hand over her heart, her face slightly red.

“He’s not a playboy.”

“Really? He’s so handsome, is he an actor or something? How did you get him to chase after you? Did you play hard to get?”

“No, he came after me.”

“Hmm.” Mom dragged out the sound as if she didn’t quite believe me, “That guy dresses so well, my dear. I feel like sweeping the floor again, worried his feet will get dirty.” Oh, when I’m at home, I’m the one who sweeps the floor all the time, T^T.

   “I hate when you say ‘that guy’.” I grumbled quietly.

“He’s really handsome, you know. At first, I almost couldn’t believe it. When North bragged about him, but like…oh, Mom’s heart might give out, I thought, ‘Is this really my future son-in-law?’, he’s just too handsome.”

“Mom, you are overpraising him more than me now.” I chuckled again, before bringing water and snacks to the living room table. I sat down next to Phii Joe on the sofa, and Mom followed, sitting on the sofa opposite us.

“Your name is Johan, right? Can I just call you Joe?”

“Yes.”

“You’re in your second year, so you’re one year senior to North, right? Is he naughty?”

“He’s pretty naughty, very much so.”

“North, don’t be naughty with him, okay?”

“Ha? Me, naughty?” I protested slightly when suddenly I got scolded by my mom. I’m not naughty, I’m a good kid, easy to teach, almost to death. I looked towards Phii Joe, who just shrugged, indicating he didn’t really care. “Young North has been stubborn and mischievous since he was a child. You need to scold him firmly. If you don’t, he won’t stop.”

“Sure.” Phii Johan gave a slight smile. There was no need for her to tell him to scold me; I was already scolded enough as it was. T^T, “Was he stubborn even as a kid?”

“Mm-hmm, very stubborn.” my mom put down her glass of water, ready to roast me thoroughly, “Before, he got picked on a lot by others, came home with bruised knees sometimes, or bumps on his head, so I solved the problem by sending North to learn boxing.”

“Boxing?” Phii Joe raised his eyebrows slightly in surprise at my mom’s words, “He learned boxing?”

“Since middle school.” I explained. When other parents have issues with their child being bullied, they might handle it differently, but my mom solved it by sending me to learn boxing.

“Wow, so my little North was quite the tough guy.” Mom said, letting out a laugh, “Just like his father.”

“That’s right, Mom, the blood of the father runs strong. We walked the path of the tough guys before.” I said jokingly, “It was an all-boys school, fighting for supremacy at Suzuran.”

Mom told me that when she first met dad, it was during high school. He was studying at a nearby technical school, which has since closed down. I once asked what she liked about dad, and she said even she couldn’t find the words to explain it herself, and then they started dating. After high school, neither of them went to college because they didn’t have the money; my grandmother couldn’t afford to send them. Both my mom and aunt only finished grade six, then worked for about two years before I was born. My mom is only thirty-eight now.

   When people ask why her son is so grown but she still looks young, my mom would answer, “Oh, I got married early.” and that’s my mom for you. I still find it funny, and there are still people who don’t know and try to flirt with her.

   “By the way, about North liking to fight?”

“I didn’t like it. They came looking for trouble.” I said, “Mostly.”

“Everyone who had issues with North ended up leaving the school. I wonder if the teachers thought it was too much.”

“Probably.” I said without much thought. I’ve wondered about it too; many who picked fights with me ended up transferring, especially those who really bullied me, they didn’t last long.

Or maybe

I turned to look at the person next to me.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Phii Joe asked, raising an eyebrow, but the slight smile on his lips confirmed my suspicions. I used to complain about these things at the game shop all the time.

Why do I feel a little scared of him now…

“At first, I thought sending him to boxing would change him into something fiercer, but no, North remained…North, just the same.” Mom said, letting out a sigh, “Still stubborn, mischievous, playful to a headache-inducing degree, and just not serious.”

“How do you eat and make such a mess?” The person next to me said, reaching out to wipe crumbs from the corner of my mouth. I unintentionally made a face at him, catching a glimpse of my mom watching us, looking a bit embarrassed.

“It’ll be evening before you know it. I’ll go prepare dinner first, do you want anything special?” She turned to ask Phii Joe. Wait, shouldn’t she be asking me? I haven’t had mom’s cooking in so long, T^T.

   “I’m hurt.” I said, pretending to sulk. “Even if you sulk, I won’t coax you.” Mom teased.

“Oh, I’m crying now.”

“Kidding, kidding.” Mom squeezed my cheeks with affection, “What do you want to eat? I’ll make it.”

“Anything is fine.”

“Annoying.” Mom said with a sigh before letting go, “That’s why I didn’t want to ask North. And what about you, do you want anything special?” She asked Phii Joe again, who shook his head slightly to say it was fine, and then my mom disappeared into the kitchen.

“Should I help with something?” I offered to help.

“Please do.”

“What can I do?”

“Just sit still.”

“…Okay.” I said, returning to the same sofa.

“Your mom is so cute, isn’t she?” Phii Johan commented.

“Of course, she’s my mom.” I said proudly, then heard the sound of the back door opening. I turned to see my aunt walking while carrying the baby. I rushed over to my little cousin immediately.

“Let me hold him.” I asked, and my aunt handed the baby to me. I looked down at the infant wrapped snugly in a blanket, “He’s wrapped up like a little burrito.”

“See, and this…”

“Hello.” Phii Joe greeted her with a smile, my aunt looked stunned since she laid her eyes on Phii Joe, her face starting to go red, she pulled me aside a bit.

“Who is that?”

“My boyfriend, the one I said I’d bring home.” I replied while playing with the baby, making faces at the tiny burrito, his little hands so small, chubby cheeks that looked like they needed a nibble, and his arms all wrinkly. “Really!”

“Shh, you scared the child.” I said, soothing the baby in my arms, “There, there, don’t cry.”

“The one you said is the grandson of our landlord, right?”

“Yes.”

“Wow, he’s so handsome, North.”

“Aunt, calm down.”

“North, I think he’s not ordinary. He’s very handsome, my heart skipped a beat just now, I almost wanted to divorce my husband.” my aunt said excitedly, truly like my mom.

“I’ll definitely tell Uncle.”

“He’s not home, went drinking with friends, ha, I have a husband, but he doesn’t love me right.”

“He’s just gone out for drinks with friends, what’s wrong with that?” I said, “You don’t have to look at my boyfriend like that, he’ll get embarrassed.”

“Acting all possessive, tell me honestly, how did you manage this? When your mom told me North said his boyfriend is handsome, I almost didn’t believe it, but then I saw him, wow, holy cow.”

“Ya’s awake now, isn’t he, Non?” I said, bending down to nuzzle my cousin’s cheek, “Don’t want to stay with Auntie Nuch anymore? Better to stay with me, Phii North.” I said, before sitting back on the sofa with the baby.

“Your nephew?”

“Yeah, would you like to hold him?”

“No.” Phii Joe said, turning his attention back to the TV. I figured Phii Joe probably isn’t much of a kid person. “Phii Joe’s not interested in you.” I talked to the baby, feeling like I turned 500% cuter when talking to kids. Then I brought Non closer to Phii Joe, “Phii Joe, hold him, please, hold him.”

“…” He looked at me but still wouldn’t play along, until little Non reached out to touch the air.

“He wants to play with you.”

“Phii North.”

“Oh, Knight.” I turned towards the voice, then handed Non back to my aunt, “What brings you here?”

“Phii North, I missed you so much.” and then Knight ran in from behind and hugged my neck because I was sitting on the sofa. This is usually how lively our house is, and now with a new baby too, relatives come to visit constantly, “Who’s that?”

“My boyfriend.”

“Wow…he’s insanely handsome.” The words slipped out from the mouth of the middle schooler, Knight, without thinking. He quickly covered his mouth in embarrassment after realizing he had spoken too loudly. Phii Joe gave a small smile at his reaction, “Phii North, do you think he heard what I just said?”

“He heard it, or else why would he smile?”

“Damn, now I’m embarrassed.”

“Come sit properly, Knight.” I said, and Knight walked around the sofa to sit next to me, giving a respectful wai to Phii Joe.

“Is he really your boyfriend, Phii North?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Oh my, I was going to show off to Phii North.” Knight said, rummaging through his pocket for something, then pulled out his phone to show me a picture, “I am courting this one, I’ll show him off later.” “Who’s this?” I took Knight’s phone. The picture was super blurry, but if I’m not mistaken, he’s wearing boys’ school trousers, “A guy?”

“Mhm.”

“What’s his name?”

“Oscar.”

“Do you have a clearer picture?”

“I do.”

“Then why not show me that?”

“Too cute. I don’t want you to see him.” I turned to look at Knight with a slightly disgusted expression at the term ‘too cute, don’t want you to see’ and showing a blurry picture; it felt oddly familiar, just like that engineering junior who was annoying.

“Well, okay. How’s the courting going?”

“By secretly looking at him.”

“Secretly looking isn’t courting, Knight.”

“That’s all I can do.”

“Night…” I called out to him with a hint of pity, then gently patted my little brother’s head, “Have some courage, soon you’ll be like my friends. If you can’t get a boyfriend now, it’ll be hard even until university.”

“How should I ask him out?”

“I don’t know.” I shook my head slightly, “Have you talked to her at all?”

“Yeah.”

“What did you talk about?”

“About Oscar, and where the bathroom is.”

“Asking for directions, huh? When did you start talking?”

“First year of high school, when he was new and didn’t know his way around the school.” “Night…” I patted my brother’s head affectionately, why am I surrounded by such cases, it’s so disheartening, T^T, “Fight for him, Phii.”

“I want to give him a gift. What do you think I should give, Phii North?”

“I don’t know, how about flowers?”

“But he’s a boy, who gives flowers to a boy?”

“Just give him a Gundam model then.” I said with resignation, “I’ve got some old Gundam models in my room, I can give you one.”

“Wow, what’s that? I’m giving a gift, and it has to be yours?” Night said, looking quite forlorn, because my uncle is quite strict, so Night doesn’t often get permission to buy things. So I often give him my stuff. After chatting for a while, it seemed like Night really wanted to talk to Phii Joe but was too shy, just kept looking at him, clearly embarrassed.

Then Phii Joe excused himself to go outside for a phone call.

“Phii North, is your boyfriend an actor or a model or something? Why is he so cool, and tall too? I want to be that tall, how can I look that good?”

“He’s not, but you will probably grow tall, Uncle is tall too.”

“His name is Phii Johan, right? Even his name is cool; what does he study?”

“He’s in his second year of medical school.”

“Wow, then he’s super smart too, why is Phii North so lucky?”

“Exactly.” I said before petting Night’s head affectionately once more. Everyone in the house really seemed excited to meet Phii Johan. It wasn’t like this when I brought friends over before.

“Here, Night, a snack allowance from me.” I handed some money to Night. His eyes widened with joy, and he quickly gave a respectful wai to thank me before taking the money from my hand.

I’ve been giving Night snack money since before because I do part-time work. If Night behaves well or gets good grades, I would buy him things or give him some money. Since I hadn’t been home in a while, I thought this would be a good opportunity.

“Thank you so much, Phii North; you are the best!”

“Night, it’s time to go back.” Aunt Nuch called out.

“What? I want to play with Phii North some more.” Night said, coming in for another hug.

“You’re still attached to cousin North. You need to go back; you haven’t done your homework yet, have you? And the baby needs to sleep too.” Aunt said. I suddenly remembered something and stood up to fetch something from my bag.

“Aunt, here, I got this as a gift for the new baby.” I said, handing her a box containing gold. She looked puzzled as she received it, but her eyes went wide when she opened it.

“Wow, gold like this? North, you’re amazing, thank you so much, my nephew is really something, at this age, buying something like this, come here for a kiss.” Aunt said happily before leaning in to kiss my cheek. I gave her an embarrassed smile. “You’re really something, Night, take your cousin as an example.”

The gold for the baby was from Phii Joe’s money, so by praising me, they were indirectly praising him, T^T.

   Before I went to see Aunt and Night off back home:

“Is your boyfriend staying the night here too?” my aunt asked.

“Yes, he’s staying.”

“That’s good, take good care of him, he’s not easy to find. I’m even jealous.”

“Ha ha, yes.” I replied with an embarrassed smile, watching as my aunt led Night back into their house. I returned to my own home, seeing my mom busy with preparing dinner, which seemed almost ready. I went outside to sit at the marble table in front of the house next to Phii Joe, who seemed to be in a serious conversation, probably about work. I sat down beside him quietly, looking at him with concern, wondering if something was wrong.

“North.” I heard a whisper calling my name, turned around to see where it came from, and found it was Cartoon, my neighbor Mrs. Kaew’s daughter, whom mom had told me about. I saw Cartoon leaning over the wall, waving at me, so I walked over.

“Yes?”

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 27 part 2

“You’re all talk, North.” Ter remarked before picking up his cards, “Are you going to be the dealer, Dao?”

“Sure.”

“Wait, what’s going on here?” Phoon asked, looking confused and slightly annoyed at us, “At first, North was going to check his fortune, wasn’t he? How did it turn into playing poker?”

“Open your cards, Cat.” Daotok said.

“Damn it…Officer, please stop these guys.” Phoon said, “Why do we have to play this?”

“Open your cards, Cat.” I repeated what Daotok said. “What’s all this?”

“Open your cards, Cat.” Ter repeated.

“Oh, fine!” Phoon exclaimed, out of patience, and picked up his cards to reveal them, “Poker nine, you animal!”

“Oh, fine!” Phoon said, out of patience, picking up a card to look at, “Pocket nines, bastard!”

“Wow, what’s that?” I placed my cards down with a sigh. Our card game only lasted a few rounds because Daotok’s luck was too good. What kind of dealer is this? But we weren’t betting money since none of us had any, and why was my luck only good for the first hand? When I went back for another fortune reading, Daotok said that my luck was very good now, especially financially.

“Really? Then I must buy a lottery ticket.” I said.

“Lottery again, North? You’ve only won once since you started buying, and you used it to buy drinks for your friends.” Ter remarked.

“People need faith, Ter. I’ve got my eyes wide open, dreaming of getting rich quick, you know? Think about it, Ter. I buy a lottery ticket for just a few hundred, and if I win, it’s millions. That’s the life, bastard. No need to work till your back breaks, it’s a real investment for profit.”

“I heard your boyfriend is rich, isn’t he?” Ter asked.

“But I’m not rich, am I? While Phii Joe is asking for thousands from the ATM, I’m still wondering why the machine doesn’t give out twenties.”

“Let’s see.” Phoon suggested. Daotok nodded, shuffled the cards, and laid them out again. Phoon picked the cards as instructed.

“Cat…”

“Huh?”

“Do some good deeds.” “Wow, Dao is telling you to do good deeds.” I said, laughing. Phoon looked really shaken, “Why, Dao? Am I going to have terrible luck?”

“No, just kidding.”

“Dao, you scared me.” Phoon said, “My heart just dropped.”

“For the cat, there will be something about love…”

“All students!!”

We all turned sharply towards the voice, finding that the club advisor had come in. Today we were assigned to draw objects that the teacher had prepared, aiming to create the most dimensional drawings. I felt quite uncomfortable with drawing. When I first joined the club, Ter and Phoon were just as bad as me, but over time their skills improved, leaving me alone here…

Plus, the teacher was quite strict, which is why there are so few people in the club even though it’s specifically for drawing.

“Wow, Dao, are you trying to outdo me with your watercolors?” I peeked over at Daotok’s painting while I was trying to cover up my own mistakes with charcoal. Daotok was using watercolors, “You’re mean, you know that.”

“Is it wrong to use colors?” Dao said, making a face at me, “The teacher said it was okay.”

“And here I am, still struggling with shading.” I said in despair, before lifting my drawing board to look at my work, “Art and I just aren’t meant to be. It’s not my path.”

“North, let’s see.” Phoon said, leaning in to have a look, “What’s this? Why do your leaves look so pitiful?”

“Shut up, or I’ll hit you with a dried fish.”

“Hit a cat with a fish?” Ter asked, bursting into laughter. After I finished my own work, I went to sit next to Daotok to watch the way of the artist. No matter how many times I watch it, I’m still amazed. How can he paint so beautifully? Ter and Phoon are also good at drawing.

   Damn, it really feels like a complex thing in my life, T^T.

   “Dao?”

“Ha?”

“Why do you have to be named Star when you’re a guy?” [1] Dao means Star

“Oh. It comes from my parents praying to a falling star for a child. They wanted to name me Daotok regardless of whether I was a boy or a girl.”

“Really? Why pray to a falling star? If they prayed to something else, would you have a different name?”

“Why do you have an issue with my name?” Dao asked while still focused on his watercolor painting, “I don’t have any problem with my name though.”

“Are you calling me annoying?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s right, you’ve got some guts now.” I said, which made Daotok chuckle a bit, “And why does it have to be a falling star? Could it have been something else? A falling star is like a meteorite fragment, right?”

“Do you want me to be named Meteorite then? That’s not it, North.”

“Change the language then, what’s it in English, Meteor?”

“…”

“Mete-or?”

“…”

“…”

“Hey, why does it have to be Daotok? I don’t get it. If someone calls a name Dao, it sounds like they’re calling a girl.”

“Why does it feel like I’m being bullied?” “Yeah. Don’t bully the one who’s doing your work for you, North. You’re so bad, bastard. You don’t attend club activities, and you don’t do the work, so Dao has to draw two pictures every time. You really don’t have any sense.”

“Wow, what’s that?”

“Don’t take it to heart, Dao. North is just like that.” Ter said.

“Exactly.” Phoon chimed in.

“I think the one being bullied right now is me.”

“And why is your name North?” Daotok turned to ask me, his brush moving back and forth in his hand.

“My mom said North means ‘above’ or ‘north,’ so why not just name me ‘North’ and be done with it? I was confused too.” I said, having asked my mom about my name before, but she just wanted it to mean ‘north.’

“And what about Ter and Phoon?”

“Oh, it comes from the Easter festival, my mom went abroad on Easter and liked it, and my younger sibling is named Christmas, also a festival theme.” Ter explained, having told me this story before when I asked.

“Your sister, Christie, she’s really cute.” I said, “If I were Phii Hill…”

“North, you’re such a villain.” Ter said, throwing a piece of paper at me.

“Come on, what’s that?”

“And what about Typhoon?” Dao looked up to ask.

“It’s to match with my sister’s name.”

“You have a sister, Phoon?” I raised an eyebrow in surprise, “That’s great, I wish I had a sibling. What’s her name?”

“Thofan.”

“How do they match?”

“Phoon and Fan, they sound similar.” And then we talked and worked at the same time. After a while, it was time to end the art club meeting, and my work score was embarrassingly low. Daotok left early, leaving just the three of us. Ter also needed to wait for Phii Hill, so I decided to go with him.

“Phoon, what are you going to do?”

“Yeah, what should I do?”

“Want to grab something to eat together? There’s food at the cafe under the medical building. You’re free now, Phoon.” Ter suggested. Phoon hesitated for a moment before nodding in agreement.

We sat down to eat and chat. I had texted Phii Joe to let him know I’d be waiting with friends. We chatted for a while, then the medical seniors entered the cafe, all of them together. Phii Hill sat next to Ter, and Phii Joe sat next to me.

“Oh, Phoon you are leaving?” I commented when I saw Phoon getting up.

“Yeah, I’m off, see you.”

“Okay, see you.” Ter and I said, a bit confused, as Phoon stood up and walked away. Was it just my imagination, or did he seem to be in a hurry? He was quite calm before, and then suddenly he dashed off.

When I turned back to our table, I thought I saw Phii Fah looking after the person who had just left, but he quickly looked away again.

Before we could continue our conversation, there was a buzz from the people in the cafe. I turned to see what everyone was looking at, and there was a woman standing in front of the cafe, visible through the clear glass.

Beautiful…

Really beautiful, stunningly so. No wonder everyone was so excited. She had long hair down to her waist, probably in her late twenties, wearing a pantsuit and high heels, giving off an aura of a celebrity or an idol, or maybe she was a celebrity I just didn’t recognize. “Gene…” I heard Phii Johan call out like that, then he got up from the table and walked out of the cafe.

gene?

Someone Phii Joe knows?

“Is she an acquaintance?” I asked the others. Phii Hill was about to answer when another scream erupted in the cafe. I quickly turned to look.

A cheek kiss…?

That woman had kissed Phii Joe’s cheek, and he didn’t seem to react much to it. I was stunned by what I saw, mixed with confusion, before both of them walked into the cafe.

“Come here.” Phii Joe called out to me, and I noticed the woman walking over to another table. As the two of them entered the shop, it seemed like everyone was watching, they made an impressive pair standing together.

I got up and followed Phii Joe, still not understanding anything, and sat down next to him. I raised my hands in a respectful greeting, and she returned the gesture. Phii Johan sat there, resting his chin on his hand with a bored look, but I was the one feeling uncomfortable.

What…what is this?

Why are they staring like that?

I inadvertently looked away because of all the eyes on us. She then propped her chin on her hand, looking at me and giving a slight smile, which was very beautiful.

Why do I feel like I’m about to be swallowed whole? It’s like when Phii Joe looks at me, the gaze is very similar.

“What are you looking at?” Phii Joe said, sounding a bit annoyed, but the smile of the person opposite us didn’t fade. She just shifted her gaze from me to Phii Joe.

“Can’t I look a bit?” “No.”

“Just a little, he’s getting shy.”

“Gene.” The person next to me said, his voice lowered slightly but still sending shivers down my spine. She then broke into a broader smile, noticing Phii Joe’s displeased demeanor.

“Hmm?”

“…”

“Wow, that’s scary. I’ve never seen you like this before, Joe.” She said, lowering her hand from her chin. “Oh, I won’t tease anymore. I just wanted to see how cute he is, since he’s managed to make you fall head over heels.”

Mom…?

   Is this Phii Joe’s mother…?

   She’s as beautiful as Phii Prang described, even more so than I had imagined.

   So, the guess that she was in her late twenties must be wrong then.

   “You’re so cute.” She said, reaching out to pinch my cheek, but before she could, Phii Joe’s hand intervened. “What’s this? Can’t I even touch?”

“No.”

“Yep. You are quite protective of what’s yours, having waited for three years now.”

My mom’s teasing words made me give a dry smile out of embarrassment.

“And so, why have you come?” Phii Joe asked.

“Just driving by this area, wanted to see my son in his medical student uniform, thought it would be better to stop by.” She said in a cheerful manner, she really seems like a lively mom, but why wouldn’t he want me to meet her?

“You’ve seen him now.” “You look so handsome with this hairstyle, can I take a photo?” She said, pulling out her phone to take a picture of Phii Joe, “Really handsome, this style suits you perfectly.”

“It’s normal, handsomer than your boyfriend, even.”

Topping being called handsome by saying you’re handsomer than your mom’s boyfriend, that’s the ultimate level of confidence!

Phii Joe’s words made his mom burst out laughing immediately.

“Fine, fine, I won’t argue, even handsomer than your dad when he was young. Let me introduce myself, I’m Johan’s mom, my nickname is the same as what Joe calls me. I’ve been called this since he was little because I asked him to call me that way, I like it. It gives a friendly vibe.” She introduced herself cheerfully, “And what about this, are you two dating?”

“Yes.” I replied with a broad smile.

“Oh my, how delightful, let me tell you, the story starts when my grandma told me that Joe was coming home drunk almost every day, and wouldn’t tell anyone what was going on. He had never been this drunk before. When I visited that day, I found Joe drunk again, and no matter how much I asked, he wouldn’t tell, until he fell asleep and started talking in his sleep.”

“Talking in his sleep?” I repeated her words, looking at Phii Joe who didn’t react at all, but I was the one feeling embarrassed, why, T^T.

“Yes, your name is North, right?”

“Yes.”

“That’s it, I started investigating until I found out it was someone who lived nearby, but Joe got really mad at me when I tried to approach you.”

“Approach me?”

“Yes, for some reason, he got angry.”

“And why would you go?” Phii Johan asked with a hint of annoyance. “Come on, why not? I was even thinking of proposing to North’s family, my dear. With a dowry of a hundred or two hundred million, twenty bars of gold, we’d take the engagement gifts right from grandma’s house and send them to North family. Or I could start by getting to know your mom first, asking for her son for my son. I promise to take good care of him.”

“…”

I couldn’t help but chuckle a little at her words. Why is Phii Joe’s mom so charming?

   “Hey. He complains that the soymilk is too sweet, but he drinks it every day.”

“Really?” I said, turning to look at the person beside me, not expecting he’d eat it all.

“When grandma found out Joe was complaining it was sweet, she stopped forcing him to eat it. But then he had been visiting to buy it every day on his own, whether he wanted the soymilk or just to sneak a peek at the cute seller.”

“…”

I broke into a wide smile and instinctively raised my hand to cover my mouth slightly from the embarrassment. I didn’t dare look at Phii Joe, so he did come to sneak looks at me every day?

“He’s cute, isn’t he?” Phii Joe’s mom continued to tease.

“He is cute. If he wasn’t, why would I go every day?”

!!

I placed my arm on the table and slid my hand to cover my face a bit, almost unable to hold back my smile. My face felt hot, and my heart started beating faster. How could he say something like that so casually?

“Sometimes you’re too straightforward, I’m embarrassed for him.” Mom said, covering her face with her hand, “And about work, he works for you, dear.” “Me?” He works for me? At first, Phii Joe told me it was because of me that he started taking an interest in the family business, and I was really happy about that.

“I heard him say…”

“Joe wants to be someone you can rely on.”

“…”

“After that, he started working harder and decided to inherit the family business. I was wondering why he accepted the offer when he’s still only in his second year, but then it clicked, because you’re here, Joe has become even more serious about work.”

Because of me…Phii Joe decided to take over the family business? That’s why his work has been so intense…

   “But when there’s someone new, he suddenly wants to spend more time with them. He’s always been all in with work, but after finishing the project in Boston, he said he wanted to put some work aside for now.”

“Well, I have someone to take care of now.”

“…” I lowered my head and bit my lip tightly, feeling my heart swell with joy upon hearing the words from the person beside me. I was so happy that he said he wanted to spend time with me. I’ve never had a problem with him not having time for me; I’ve always said I understood, but it does feel better knowing I’m someone he wants to make time for.

“That’s good then. I don’t want you to overwork, you’re still studying too. You can work more after you graduate, but once you start working, you might not have as much time. Will you understand that, North?” Mom asked, turning to look at me. “He might even work harder than before.”

“I understand.” I said, “But if he overworks, I’ll worry, you know.”

“Can I hug you? Why are you so adorable? And you’re someone my son loves so much.” Mom said, standing up from her chair and walking over to sit beside me. “Gene, no.” Phii Joe said, pulling me closer, “That’s why I said I didn’t want you to meet.”

“What’s wrong? I’m just happy, why is he so cute? I can see why Joe likes him, just one little hug.”

“No.”

“Aww.” Mom said with a sigh, sitting back down, “But I want to thank you, thank you for everything. If there’s time, I’d like to treat you to something nice to eat, but I’m sorry, I have to rush off now.” She said, glancing at her wristwatch.

“That’s okay.” I replied.

Then Mom asked me some general questions like what I was studying, if my studies were going well, before she had to leave in a hurry. We walked her to her car.

“Bring him home sometime, I’ll talk to your dad about it.”

“Will Dad have time?” Phii Joe asked.

“He’ll have to find the time one of these days, we’ll meet soon, and Joe, take good care of him, you’re so protective.” Mom teased again, then rummaged through her bag for something, “Ah, here, for snacks.”

“No need, I can pay for him.”

“Really? Oh, I forgot, my little Joe probably has more money than me. Then, can I at least give him a kiss?”

“No.”

“A hug then?”

“Gene, I made things clear.”

“So fierce.” Phii Joe’s mom said, making a pouting face at Phii Joe. I think they’re a really cute mother-son pair, “Mom’s starting to get scared now, what if someone messes with the kid, won’t they die? Oh, but there’s already one person.”

“Ha? What?” I looked at her with a puzzled expression. “The person who messed with you, dear, be careful, this one is very protective. If he gets really protective, someone might actually die.”

“Ha, what do you mean?”

“It’s nothing, so I will go now, Joe, you should come home too, you can come back with him.”

“Alright.” Phii Joe said, before my mom got in the fancy car and it drove off.

“Your mom is so cute.” I remarked as we walked back to the original coffee shop. It seemed like my mom was quite touchy-feely like Phii Joe, always wanting to hug or kiss, maybe that’s why he didn’t want them to meet.

“Is she?”

“And what did mom mean by what she said earlier?”

“Hmm, what?”

“About someone messing with me.”

“Oh. Just that.” Phii Joe said with an air of not caring much. He had this attitude that told me asking wouldn’t get me any further answers.

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 27 part 1

   Chapter 27: Cat and Fortune

   I felt like I had a fever…

And a hangover too.

Right now, we were lying on the bed with Phii Joe holding me from behind as he usually does. It’s almost always like this when we’re together, and I like it, I like being held by him like this.

But now…

“Uh, p…please, enough.” I said with a hoarse voice, trying to move away after being kissed at the nape of my neck. The events of last night made me feel even more embarrassed around Phii Joe, but as soon as I tried to escape, I was pulled back into his embrace.

“Still have a headache?”

“A bit, yes.” “It’ll get better soon.” Phii Joe said, because he had already gone out to buy painkillers and hangover remedies for me when we first woke up. Now, I am feeling gradually better.

“Cough.” I coughed as my throat felt sore and dry, then accepted the water bottle he handed to me, “Thank you, my throat really hurts.”

“You were moaning so loudly last night.”

“Phii!” I protested, but my voice came out hoarse, I furrowed my brows and made a pouty face before taking a sip from my water bottle and placing it back on the table. It wasn’t just my throat that’s sore, my hips were aching too.

Who’s fault was that? And he still has the nerve to tease me!

“It’s all your fault…”

“I told you not to be mischievous. If you can’t get up, don’t blame me.”

“I was drunk…” I argued back a little, embarrassed by the teasing, my face getting hot as I remembered last night, both at the bar when someone was bothering Phii Joe and I didn’t like it. So I…

Why did I even dare to do that? Frank and James were there, T^T, next time I see them, I’m definitely going to be teased like crazy, not to mention what happened in the car and back in the room.

Why does he have to be like this!

With my hips in pain, I leaned back against the person behind me for support. I tried to get up, but it was almost impossible, but I thought it would get better after a while like last time. I woke up to find myself in pajamas. Phii Johan must have bathed me and changed my clothes.

“Do you have class?” I asked.

“I do, in the afternoon, do you?”

“I do too, both morning and afternoon, but I’ll miss the morning class.” I said, “I already asked a friend to excuse me for the morning.” “Then I’ll drop you off at the faculty in the afternoon, right?” “Yes.” I nodded in agreement. Since we started living together, a lot has changed. From waking up in the morning, I’d often find myself still being cuddled. If I got up first, after a while, Phii Joe would wake up because I wasn’t there. I noticed that every time I got out of bed, he’d start looking for me, and if he didn’t find me, he’d wake up in a huff.

I like these things, it’s like he can’t sleep without holding me, and he doesn’t want me to go anywhere. I’m the same way, just like Ter said, I’m addicted to snuggling up to him. If I’m not being held, I can’t sleep either.

Getting up to make breakfast felt like being back at home. We’d eat breakfast together, then he’d drop me off at class before heading to his own, and we’d come back together after classes.

I took one of his hands in mine. I really like his hands; they’re so warm. After playing with his hand for a while, I noticed the tattoo on his arm.

“Should I get a tattoo too?” I said playfully.

“Do you want one?”

“Yeah, does it hurt?”

“For Phii, it didn’t hurt.”

“Uh…you don’t have to refer to yourself as ‘Phii’ for me.” I said, still not used to this kind of talk. Even though recently Phii Joe has been referring to himself as ‘Phii ’ more often.

Phii Joe has changed quite a bit since we started dating. Not like before we were together at all, or maybe I should say he’s back to how he used to be. It might be because he was stressed from work. He once told me that he didn’t want to pursue me earlier because when he’s stressed from work, he gets easily irritated, but I had my issues with Temp before that. Once the work from Boston was done, there wasn’t much to stress about anymore.

So, he teases me a lot now, T^T

He leaned his face close to mine, gently pressing the tip of his nose against my cheek before pressing down harder.

But when he pulled back, I turned and kissed his cheek in return. It wasn’t the first time I’ve kissed him on the cheek. We’re dating now, after all, it’s one way of showing affection. Even though I’m still a bit shy, I still want to do it.

“Are you teasing me?”

“Not at all.” I said, “You do it yourself, and you don’t need to refer to yourself as ‘Phii’ for me.” I reiterated.

“Why not, when last night North; you were still calling me ‘darling’?”

“…”

“Does Phii Johan belong only to North?”

“Phii Joe!!” I protested when he teased me by repeating the same sentence I said yesterday, oh my, how embarrassing, why does he tease me so well? Seeing me get flustered, he smiled and let out a little laugh, seemingly very pleased, “It’s because of that person, how could you let him hug you like that?”

“Are you jealous?”

“…Yeah, I…I have to be jealous, Phii you’re North’s boyfriend.”

“Yes, I am North’s boyfriend.”

“…”

“I am the only boyfriend of North.”

“Stop teasing me. Please.” I said, burying my face in the blanket. That deep voice whispering in my ear just now nearly gave me a heart attack, I was so embarrassed I felt like crying. It’s me, T^T.

“I like it.” “Huh?” I asked, confused when he suddenly said that. “I like it when you get jealous like this.” “…”

“When you’re this cute, how could I go anywhere?”

“Phii Joe!!”

I think I can’t handle this anymore, my hands are all cold. I tried to take deep breaths to calm down and slow my heart rate a bit, otherwise, I might really have a heart attack.

“Uh…Phii.” I called him, remembering something, “My mom invited us to our house, is this Saturday okay for you?”

“It’s fine, do you want me to come?”

“Yes.”

“Hmm. If that’s the case, then let’s go.”

“Um, and about your home…Can I go there?” I hesitated before deciding to ask, and he seemed surprised by my question.

“Do you want to go?”

“Yes.”

“You can go, but I’m not too keen on you meeting my mom.”

“Huh? Why not, is she strict?”

“Not at all.”

“Oh. So, should we meet your dad then?”

“Hmm, but he’s usually busy, do you want to meet my grandparents?”

“Alright, is your grandma the one who lives near my house?”

“Hmm, we’ll go to both places on Saturday then.” Phii Joe said before leaning down to rub his nose between my neck and cheek as he likes to do, and that still made my heart race, “Will we stay over?” “Uh, I guess we’ll have to stay over since it’s Saturday. Would you like to stay at grandma’s house? I think my mom would like you to stay over too.”

“We’ll stay at your house then.”

“…Okay.”

I said softly. No matter what, I’m still not used to using his real name, for heaven’s sake.

I initially thought I was feeling much better and could go to class, but ultimately, Phii Joe wouldn’t let me. I watched him as he changed into his student uniform to go to class.

“Can I really not go?” I asked again. I really didn’t want to miss class because lately, I’ve been studying more seriously. Partly because of Phii Joe; he has been quite an inspiration to me.

“No need to go.”

“But…” I said, making a slight pout, before Phii Joe came over and sat beside me.

“If you go to class like this…”

“I’ll be so worried I won’t be able to focus on anything.”

“…”

“Do you want me to worry?”

“No, I don’t.” I answered quietly, shaking my head.

“Hmm, good.” He then leaned in close, kissing me softly and holding it for a while before pulling away. I felt a slight warmth on my face and gave him a shy smile.

“What time will you be back?”

“Class ends at six-thirty, I’ll hurry back.” He said, then reached up to gently stroke my head. I smiled lightly back at him. I’m not usually one for having my head patted, but with Phii Joe, it’s an exception. After Phii Joe left the room, I was left with nothing much to do. Even though it was hard to walk, I could manage. I spent nearly two hours playing on the computer, and just as I was about to make some Ovaltine, Ter sent me a message.

Easter: North, come to the club today.

   North♣: Huh, which club?

   Easter: Art club.

   Easter: You’re in the art club, remember?

   Easter: sends an image

   I scrolled to open the image Ter sent, finding it was a photo of an attendance sheet where my name was barely marked, indicating I hardly ever attend the club.

Easter: One more absence and you won’t pass the club activities.

   North♣: Oh no, what time do I have to go?

   Easter: Four o’clock, but we’re already waiting.

   Easter: sends an image

   Ter sent a picture of himself with Typhoon and Daotok sitting together on a marble bench near the old art building, which is where our art club is located. When we’re in the club, we don’t stay in a room; we draw at the marble bench area.

North♣: Tell Phoon to get some sleep.

   North♣: He looks like he hasn’t slept in eight years.

   Easter: What about me?

   North♣: You, Phoon?

   Easter: You’ve been out of sight for a while.

   Easter: Dao asked about you, by the way.

   North♣: Why would she ask about me?

   Easter: Are you coming today?

   North♣: I’ll go, the teacher has marked my name in red so many times.

   Easter: Come on then.

   “Ouch!” I exclaimed in surprise when the hot water meant for Ovaltine scalded my hand, causing me to drop the glass, which shattered all over the floor.

Damn it…

North♣: Phii…I am sorry, T^T

   North♣: sends picture

   I sent a picture of the shattered glass all over the floor. Why do I manage to mess up his room in just a moment, T^T

I was a bit surprised when suddenly Phii Joe called. I thought he was in class and wouldn’t have time to reply to messages.

(Are you okay?)

   “Uh, oh, uh. I’m fine. Just got a little scalded by hot water.”

(Why do you always make me worry?)

   “Phii…” I said softly, feeling immediately guilty when he scolded me. When Phii Johan scolds me, I really do feel down, “I’m sorry.”

(At least try to be careful when I’m not around.)

   “…”

(How can I leave North alone like this?)

   “Sorry, I will be careful from now on.” I said, feeling guilty.

(And did you get cut by the glass?)

   “I didn’t get cut.”

(Hmm. Don’t clean it up then, don’t walk over there either.)

   “Yes, Phii Joe, I’ll have to go to the club soon, I’ll fail activities if I miss it again, can I go?”

(What club?)

   “The art club.” (Oh…Hill) Phii Joe said, calling out for Phii Hill, but not loudly, probably they’re together.

(The art club where you signed us up, right? From the first semester?)

   (Yes, why?)

   (Ter is there, right? Then why isn’t the art club listed on my university website?) Phii Joe asked.

(The professor doesn’t allow it. They don’t let medical students join.)

   (Oh…and what time do you have to go?) Phii Joe asked me again.

“Four o’clock, but the others are already waiting.” I replied.

(Then I’ll come pick you up.)

   “Okay.” I said before hanging up. It wasn’t long before Phii Joe arrived to take care of the burn on my hand. It wasn’t a serious burn, but the water was hot enough to sting. I got scolded a bit; Phii Joe was probably worried about me. I should have been more careful, really.

He had called the maid to clean up the mess. Then he drove me to the art club, which I hadn’t attended in a while. Just seeing the building made my spirit sink.

“Do you have cheer practice today?” Phii Joe asked.

“No, I’ve already told a friend to excuse me, said I wasn’t feeling well.” I said. The sports day was coming up in just a few days, so our cheerleading practice had been intensifying, ending later and later each day, and I was feeling more and more discouraged. Going to cheerleading felt like being drained of energy.

At first, Phii Joe had told me I didn’t have to go if I didn’t want to. If there were any problems, he would handle them for me. The idea of him handling things for me gave me goosebumps in a way I couldn’t describe. In the end, I did join in the faculty activities, after all, it’s just something you do once as a freshman.

“If anything comes up, just call me.” Phii Joe said. I nodded in acknowledgment. Before he leaned in for another kiss, but this time it wasn’t just a peck like before; it was more than that. We kissed for a while before pulling apart, “It’s just club activities, nothing too serious, right?”

“Yes, um…study hard, Phii.” I said before opening the car door and stepping out. He always kisses me whenever we’re about to be apart. Even so, I still felt quite embarrassed.

I walked over to sit at the same table as my three friends, sitting next to Ter with Phoon and Daotok sitting across from us.

Phoon is Ter’s friend from the same faculty. Daotok, on the other hand, is a friend from the art club, and he’s a guy. I still don’t get why he’s named after a star when he’s a guy, but he’s in the science faculty and draws beautifully, like animal beauty, breathtaking. Whether it’s black and white, colored pencil, watercolor, pastel, oil paint, or even house paint, he can draw it. He even does freelance work in this field, but he studies science because his family doesn’t support his art.

“North, do you know that when you don’t show up for the club, Dao has been doing all your work?” Ter said, which made me raise my eyebrows in surprise.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Otherwise, you would have failed activities a long time ago.”

“Dao, why are you so nice?” I said softly, truly touched by how others always have to do work for me, but why didn’t I tell him I also needed to submit work?

“Everyone’s nice, except you.” Ter retorted.

“That hurts, bastard.”

“North, so you’re dating Phii Johan, Phii Hill’s friend?” Phoon asked. I nodded in response, “Oh, I hope you guys last long. But how did it all happen? I’ve been confused ever since Ter told me.”

“It’s a long story.”

“So, have you guys moved rooms now?” Phoon asked, then made a pouty face at us, “Oh, that’s so boring. Why do you have to be like Foam, why do you have to ditch friends when you get a partner? Where am I supposed to go to take a nap now?”

“Cat is sulking, Ter.” I said.

“Cat, don’t sulk.”

“Another cat.” Phoon said with a sigh, “Why does it have to be a cat?”

“Because you look like a cat, a sleepy one. Seriously, how many hours do you sleep in a day?” I teased lightly, “You look like you’ve never had a full night’s sleep in your life.”

“I’ve slept, North, this is just my normal face.” Phoon said, making a slightly petulant face. Phoon often gets teased for looking like a sleepy cat, especially since he’s known to nap a lot during the day at school.

“Uh, Dao, can I have one of those?” I asked, remembering something because I hadn’t seen Dao much lately, forgetting the most important thing. Dao looked up at me slightly.

“Are you asking for another one, North?” Ter asked.

“Do it for fun, Ter.” before Dao pulled out a deck of cards from his pocket, placed them face down, and laid them out in front of us.

“Oh. Are we looking at cards today?” I asked.

“Yeah, today’s good for reading cards.” Dao said.

“Wow, that’s exciting.” I said with excitement, “What do I do?”

“Choose two cards first.”

I’m someone who quite believes in fate, and since Dao said he could read fortunes, I often came to him for readings because they were really accurate. Last time I won the lottery because of Dao, and even my Line ID, which is my nickname followed by a club symbol, was on Dao’s advice that it would bring good luck.

It’s too easy to believe in stuff like this… I hesitated for a while before picking up two cards.

“Hey!!”

“What’s up, North?”

“Two-card poker nine!”

“…”

Everyone at the table went silent before bursting into laughter, “I told you to check your fortune, not to play poker, you animal, and you even got a two-card nine.” Ter said, still laughing.

“Does this mean today is my lucky day, dao?”

“Are you crazy? It’s not related at all.”

“Oh, well then, what now? Dao, it’s your turn.”

“Ha, why would I pick?”

“Pick.” I insisted, until Daotok, who was sitting across from me, had to pick up two cards as well, “I win! Pay up.”

“Oh, are we really playing poker now?” Daotok asked before gathering the cards in his hand, “Let’s do it.” and then he started shuffling and dealing to everyone.

“Come on, today I’m definitely on a roll.” I said confidently.

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 26 part 2

“And we’ll name the shop, ‘Engineering’s Chicken Rice’.”

“Sounds good, James. I can already picture myself slicing chicken at the front of the shop.” I said, putting my hand over my heart in mock sadness, “Don’t tease me, Phii. Are you saying we’ll stick together as fellow engineers when we’re both out of work?”

“North, I’m touched, I think I can’t handle it, I’m about to cry.” James said, making a sad face, and drank again, “It’s not for nothing that kids from our faculty come to the bar often, it’s for venting. What should I do after I graduate? Will I have a job? Will I be retired? Come, North, let’s toast to that.” I raised my glass to clink with James’s.

“This is pathetic.” Phii Joe commented, watching me and James who were starting to get drunk.

“North, I’ll give you a shortcut to get rich.” James said. I turned to look at him with interest, “The person sitting next to you, North, you can just act cute and ask for pocket money. I bet if you act cute, you might even get a black card, with at least a million credit limit.” I switched from an interested to a disgusted look at James. No way I’m acting cute. Absolutely not.

Phii Joe shrugged slightly, not caring about the suggestion, then took another sip of his drink.

“Hey, Frank, how’s your faculty? I hear there’s a lot of complaining.” James asked. “Same here. I can’t see any light at the end of the tunnel, damn it. Why didn’t I get into medicine? At least I’d have a job for sure.” Frank said with a sigh, “Why would you study medicine if you already have a job?” before turning to Phii Joe.

“I’ve heard this question a hundred times already.” Phii Joe said, “If I had a choice, I wouldn’t want to study, damn, it’s so hard.”

“You’ve got people helping you, like Tonfah, and Hill, who are both super smart, aren’t they?”

“They are good, but for me, it’s about the work. I’m lazy when it comes to work.” Phii Joe explained, letting out a small sigh, “But Fah is a good guy, he does my work without me even asking, because he knows I’m busy.”

“And Hill?”

“Hill is also good, but lately, he’s been all about his wife, leaving my work behind.”

“Ha, when you say ‘all about his wife,’ it’s not just Hill, is it?” James teased, “So, what about Arthit? Has he come back from Brazil yet? That’s so wild, can someone really be that detached from reality? I’m baffled.”

“He’s back, with a medical certificate from Brazil saying he got bitten by piranhas. The whole faculty was puzzled.” I chuckled at the story, finally, Arthit is back, and the piranha thing must be true.

“Aren’t you drinking, Joe?” Frank asked after seeing Phii Joe only take a small sip.

“Nah, I’ll pass. I’ll drive later.” Phii Joe said.

“Just here to watch over his ‘wife’, I guess. At first, he said he wanted to drink, but now that you’re here, he doesn’t drink at all.” James teased further, “But normally, he can drink a lot without getting drunk, can’t he?”

“I won’t get drunk, but if we run into a checkpoint, I’ll be in trouble.”

“So, the little one can get drunk?” “Yeah, I’ll be here. It’s fine.” Phii Joe said casually, which made me smile secretly, feeling like someone was taking care of me.

The conversation at the drinking table shifted around. In a group of guys drinking, the talk can get a bit rough, but I didn’t mind, and James seemed particularly keen on getting me drunk.

“North, why are you holding your liquor so well? We’re not just playing around here.” James said. I, starting to feel dizzy, turned to look at him.

“Phii, I’m about to collapse.”

“Can you handle it?” Phii Joe asked. I turned to give him a wide smile, my mind not quite there. “James, stop mixing drinks for him.”

“Wow, we’re here to celebrate you two finally getting together.”

“But isn’t it weird, James? When Joe got heartbroken by our junior, we drank, and now we’re celebrating him being in a relationship, we drink.” Frank questioned.

“Can’t help it, the heart loves what it loves.” James said.

“That’s enough.” Phii Joe said, pulling the glass of liquor away from my hand.

“But I want more.” I started to whine, the alcohol now coursing through my body. James is really good at mixing drinks, and they’re delicious too.

“Enough. What will you do if you get sick?” He said with a slightly stern tone, which made me pout immediately. I’m not that strong of a drinker, and with the drinks James made, claiming they were mixed the same way for Phii Joe, who never seems to get drunk no matter how much he drinks. Here I am, after just two glasses, already losing my balance.

“All this tenderness, warmth, and concern, what’s all this about? Will I ever get some of that from Joe, or not?” James teased again, “Oh, I forgot, I am not North.” “Uh-oh, Joe, trouble’s brewing.” Frank said, making Phii Joe furrowed his brows in confusion before turning to look in the direction Frank was looking, and I turned to look too.

Who is that…

She’s really beautiful.

“Joe.” The woman called out softly, standing behind the sofa where we were sitting, slowly draping her arms around Phii Joe’s neck from behind, “Fancy seeing you here. Out for fun?”

“…” Phii Joe didn’t reply, just removed her hands, but she wouldn’t let go.

“Oh, how cold. Last time we were in bed together, it wasn’t like this.” She whispered into his ear, making everyone else at the table look around awkwardly.

“Grace, are you drunk?” James asked.

Grace…? Isn’t that the name someone mentioned before, the one who was supposed to be Phii Joe’s girlfriend, the third-year dental student, right?

   Damn, why does my head feel so dizzy?

   “I’m not drunk, James, I’m perfectly fine, and I miss my dear one so much, you know…Grace’s dear one.” Her voice was sweet and teasing. I looked over to see Phii Joe being hugged by this woman, but he didn’t do anything. He just glanced at me.

What does that smile mean?

Waiting to see what I’ll do…

“Why did you need to break up with me? Do you know how much I love you, Joe? I would give everything for you.”

“…”

“…”

“Come back to me.” She said sweetly once more, then walked around the sofa, attempting to sit in Phii Joe’s lap. But…

…

Phii Johan smiled slightly, wrapping his arms around my waist. I, being quite drunk, only knew that this spot was mine. I moved to sit on Phii Joe’s lap, my arms reaching around his neck.

“Looks like it’s getting serious.” Someone at the table teased me, but I paid no mind to anything else.

“Phii…”

“Hmm?”

“Phii Johan belongs to me; I am North…he is only North’s.” I said, making a pouty face at him, not fully aware of what I was saying, “You’re only mine, right? Answer me now.”

“Yes, I’m only North’s.”

“Joe…” Grace said, looking stunned before starting to protest slightly, but James pulled her away first.

“Grace, don’t mess with Joe.” James interjected, trying to pull Grace back, but she resisted, shaking off James’s hand and stepping forward, reaching out to pull me away.

However, Phii Joe caught her hand first, glancing at her with clear disapproval, squeezing her wrist tightly until she yelped in pain. Grace tried to pull her hand back, but Phii Joe let go abruptly.

“Leave, don’t cause a scene here.” Frank said quietly. Grace bit her lip to suppress her emotions and stormed off, her high heels clicking angrily against the floor.

“Ugh, why do there have to be others?” I asked. “Don’t want me to have others?” Phii Johan asked, turning his gaze back to me. We locked eyes as if spellbound. Normally, I wouldn’t dare to look into those eyes, but with alcohol running through my veins, I felt braver.

“Can’t there be just me? Just look at me alone, can you?”

“If you’re asking for that, what do I get in return?” His deep voice whispered, his handsome face just inches away, a slight smile indicating his satisfaction. He pulled my waist closer, and I slowly leaned in, touching our lips gently before a warm, aggressive touch took over. I responded to the kiss, the scent of alcohol from both of us filling the air.

The dim lights of the bar, the slow rhythm of the music, combined with my inebriated state from drinking too much, the sound of kissing was embarrassingly loud, and the person in front of me, who was perfectly sober, didn’t seem to be stopping anytime soon. I felt a flush of heat all over my body, especially a tingling warmth from my lower abdomen rising up.

“Mm.” The kiss was intense, tongues entwining, lips pressing and nibbling on each other, the hollow feeling in my stomach intensified. My thighs tensed as the pain in my crotch grew, my eyelids remained shut, my breathing became quick and shallow like someone drowning.

“Can you take it easy? Even if we’re at the darkest corner of the bar where no one can see, we’re still here, you know.” Someone remarked, and then Phii Joe slowly broke the kiss.

“Ugh.” I whimpered without realizing, and the person who had just pulled away seemed quite pleased with my reaction.

“Want to head back with your junior, Joe?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” Phii Joe said, pulling out his wallet to drop some money on the table.

“Wow, Papa’s paying for us.” “Thanks, James, Frank.” The man in front of me said before lifting me up. I still had my arms around his neck, barely conscious in my drunken state.

“Phii…” I called out to the person carrying me, it seemed like we were already walking out of the bar. I remembered that Phii Joe had parked far away because there was no space nearby, in an area not frequented by many people, “Cold…”

“We’ll be in the car soon.”

“I don’t like it.”

“…”

“I don’t like it when others look at you. Even back at the faculty.”

“Hmm, really?”

“Yes. Can you make them stop looking? Don’t let others look at you.”

“You’re drunk.” His deep voice remarked, opening the car door and setting me down on the passenger seat, adjusting it to recline, before Phii Joe got into the driver’s seat.

“Mm, Phii…”

“What is it?”

“Phii Joe…” I turned towards the driver, the reclined seat making me lie down, looking at him even in my disoriented state, reaching out to gently touch his face.

“Why are you so handsome?”

“…”

“Ah!” I exclaimed in surprise as I was pulled in, sitting on his lap facing him. We were in the driver’s seat.

“Is this how you usually are when drunk?”

“Uh.” I shook my head, “No, but earlier I was angry. How could that woman touch you? I’m jealous too, you know.”

“How can someone be this cute when drunk?” “…” I didn’t reply, and my brain couldn’t process much anymore, before my consciousness began to fade. I leaned into the person in front of me, resting against him when I felt I had no strength left.

Even though I was about to fall asleep, I felt like I wanted to hug him tighter.

“Can I hug you a bit more?”

“…” The other person didn’t say anything, just tightened his embrace. Being this close, I could feel the familiar warmth, and one of my hands reached out to hold his warm hand, touching the bracelet with my gear on it.

“Someone who used to not even want to have perfume on him, now dares to wear a gear to show everyone he has someone in his heart.”

James’s words from earlier made me smile broadly.

“Phii Johan belongs to North.” I declared, usually someone who talks a lot, and even more so when drunk.

“North isn’t usually jealous, but with you, I don’t want anyone else to look at you. What’s Grace’s beloved compared to North’s beloved?”

“…”

“Do you understand? You’re the only beloved of North’s.” I muttered softly, snuggling closer and closer, the faint scent making me want to nuzzle even more, pressing my nose against his neck.

“Hey…” He whispered gently by my ear.

“Yes?”

“My dear.”

“…”

“If you keep doing this…”

“…”

“I might not be able to wait until we get to the room.” The soft whisper in my ear made me unconsciously hold my breath, his large hands began to roam up my back, his lips pressing down in a fierce kiss, our tongues entwining and creating sounds from the contact. My body, already flushed from the alcohol, grew even hotter under his warm touch.

I didn’t hear any sounds from outside indicating that the car was parked quite far from people, and the car itself was soundproofed with tinted windows all around.

As my consciousness was on the verge of slipping away, I responded to the sensations. Phii Johan lifted my shirt, slowly breaking the kiss to press his lips against my chest, his hands holding me to arch my back.

“Ah, mm.” I gasped when the warm tip of his tongue licked my nipple. I arched my back inadvertently to meet his touch, and Phii Joe’s nibbling intensified, making my whole body twitch, sending shivers from my chest down to my stomach and to the core of my being.

And since I was wearing sweatpants, they were easily pulled down. I winced slightly in pain as he left another mark on my neck, his warm breath teasing my ear, the ache in my core growing into a sweet torment.

“Ah! mm, oh.” I startled when one hot hand touched my core, slowly caressing the tip, moving up and down until I felt more aroused.

“Mm, P…Phii.” I called out in a hoarse voice, my legs now completely powerless. The alcohol was taking its toll, my mind spinning as he trailed kisses from my neck to my ear.

“Oh, ah! Mmh.” I cried out loudly when his slender fingers moved from my shaft to the back-hole, pressing and circling. Phii Johan slightly lifted his head before kissing me again, his hot tongue moving over mine, the familiar rhythm of his kisses making my heart pound so hard it felt like it might burst out. No matter how fast I breathed, I couldn’t catch up with the intensity. The tip of his finger pressed against the back, that touch alone sending waves of sensation through my stomach to my thighs, closing my eyes tightly, not daring to look at him, but I could sense that Phii Joe was also breathing heavily, seemingly getting aroused as well. His long, slender finger slowly entered me, the pain making me wince immediately.

“It hurts! Ahhh, mmh!” I broke the kiss from the man in front of me, but then he pressed my nape to kiss me again, all I could do was moan through my throat, before his finger started to move in and out, quicker each time, and I involuntarily moved my hips to the rhythm of his motions.

My powerless legs were slightly lifted by his control. I was only stripped of my pants. Phii Joe hadn’t removed a single piece of his clothing.

And…now we were in the car.

“Ahh! Mm.” I cried out louder when he added another finger, the adjustment of the seat providing more room, but the car was still too cramped, our faces only centimeters apart. I could barely make out the features of the face I found so captivating, blurred by the effects of alcohol.

I reached out and lightly touched the front of Phii Johan, feeling through the jeans that it was starting to get hard. Phii Johan didn’t say anything, just watching to see what a drunk me would do.

I unzipped his pants, still surprised even though I had seen it once before, pulled down his underwear, and lightly touched what I saw, noticing a small tattoo at his waist. I traced the tattoo gently, it made him look even more fiery, and at that moment, another finger joined the one already moving behind me.

“Ah!”

“Don’t rile me.”

“…”

“If you won’t be able to get up tomorrow…don’t be mad at me.” !!

“Ahhh! ah, ah, ah!” I bent forward, leaning against Phii Joe’s chest as the force from behind was too much, biting my lip in pain, but soon the three long fingers were withdrawn. I found myself moving my hips instinctively seeking a replacement for those fingers.

“Now try it yourself.”

A deep whisper in my ear made me look up at him in confusion. Phii Joe smirked slyly, then pulled me up again so I was kneeling between his legs instead. Phii Johan pressed my hips down, the large shaft touching my back passage, and as he continued to press down, it entered me more and more.

“Again! it hurts, it hurts, ahhh!” The pain shot through me, and he too grimaced slightly as he tried to push inside me, until finally, he was fully in. Then he paused, looking at me, until I had to turn away because I couldn’t handle his gaze.

What…what is this?

I was breathing heavily, feeling the presence inside me, and it still hurt a lot. Plus, it was embarrassing with him looking at me like that.

“Ah!” I jumped when suddenly my shirt was removed. It was warm in the car. Without clothes, I felt even more exposed.

“Phii…”

“…”

“P…Phii”

“Hmm?”

“Uh…that…”

I didn’t understand what was happening right now…

“Can you do it?”

!!!

“I…North is not good at it, Phii.” “Try moving.”

I bit my lip in embarrassment to the point I felt like I might explode, his strong hands gently supporting my waist, guiding me to move up and down slowly.

“Mmm.” I moaned from my throat, trying to move on my own like this almost drove me crazy. The initial pain turned into a tingling sensation that slowly built up, my mind started to blank out, my consciousness scattered more than before due to the alcohol.

“Ah, ah, mm.” I cried out louder as the pleasure intensified, both painful and arousing, spreading through my body. I quickened my pace with his guidance until he let go of my waist, allowing me to take the lead.

I moved timidly but by this point, I couldn’t think anymore. Whenever I hit a spot that felt particularly good, I would press down there more.

“Ahhh, ah, ah.” I was nearly driven mad by the heated sensations.

The look in Phii Johan’s eyes, his expression…

Good grief…

He’s insanely sexy.

I reached out to gently touch Phii Joe’s face, leaning in to kiss his lips, feeling something akin to an outpouring from my chest.

“Mmm…”

“You’re almost driving me crazy, you know that?” Phii Joe whispered hoarsely in my ear after I broke the kiss, nibbling his own lip slightly before his hand pressed on my hips, pushing me down deeper.

Then he took control again, moving my hips faster. I was moaning incoherently as he thrust up against my rhythm, making the sensation even more intense, reaching deep into my abdomen, until you could hear the sounds of flesh meeting.

“Ahhh, more, ah, ah, Phii…brother, please…” When I couldn’t take it anymore, I let go, at the same time, something warm was released inside me, spilling out. “Mm.” I breathed heavily, my chest heaving, leaning back against his chest, utterly exhausted, even though he was still inside me. The effects of the alcohol combined with what we just did made me lose consciousness.

I groggily awoke to find myself being carried, then placed on a bed.

“…Phii Joe?” I called out to the person laying me down, noticing I was fully clothed again, except for the pain around my hips.

“You’re awake?”

“Uh!” As soon as I was laid on the bed, Phii Joe kissed me forcefully, crushing his lips against mine as if not allowing me a moment’s rest, moving up onto the bed to straddle me, before the headache from the lingering alcohol returned.

“Uh.” I made a sound in my throat as my mouth was covered, my pants were quickly removed, and slender fingers entered me swiftly, making me jump. I closed my eyes tightly; this time it didn’t hurt as much since we had done it before.

But…but

Are we going to do it again…

“Ah! ah, ahh.” The fingers moved in and out quickly, then withdrew. I slowly opened my eyes a bit, looking up at him.

Phii Johan leaned back slightly, glancing at me beneath him before he took off his shirt, revealing his beautiful muscles, defined abs, and that tattoo at his waist once more.

Oh, for heaven’s sake…

I might die from that sly smile and gaze.

With a quick motion, he brushed his hair back, hands moving to the waistband of his pants where the edge of white underwear peeked out, before he removed his pants. My face flushed with heat, and I looked away.

I’m going to have a heart attack because of him. Does he know… Before I could react, my shirt was off, and I felt pain at my chest and neck. I guessed there were red marks all over me now. Phii Joe lifted my legs and inserted himself once more.

Again.

“Ah! ahhh, ah ah ah.” I raised my hands to cover my face in embarrassment, trying to hold back my moans but failing as the thrusts were so forceful, shaking my body with each movement.

“Ah! ah! ah!” I cried out with each thrust, the rhythm fast and intense, overwhelming me. The sound of flesh hitting flesh was loud, emphasizing the sensitive spot repeatedly. I twisted under him.

My hands gripped his arms to vent the overwhelming sensation spreading through me.

I can’t take it anymore…I really can’t take it.

“Mmm.” I reached my peak again and released, Phii Joe slowly slowed down, allowing me to open my eyes and look at him. But before I could see anything clearly, he turned me to lie on my side.

Then he lifted one of my legs over his shoulder and thrust in powerfully once more.

Changing to this side position changed how everything felt. I gripped the bedsheet tightly and moaned louder than before. In this position, there was no denying that it felt different, but it still felt good…too good, to the point where I lost all sense.

“Ahhh, ah, mmh.” I bit down hard and buried my face into the pillow.

It’s tingling…so much.

I…I’m going to lose my mind. When he hit that sensitive spot repeatedly with force, I couldn’t help but cry out, even though I had no strength left. I was panting heavily, my consciousness fading, this position allowed him to go in so deep.

“Ah! ah, ah.” I was about to release again as I reached the climax, “No…no, I can’t anymore. Mmh, ah.”

“Are you about to finish?” He asked in a deep voice. I struggled to open my eyes, seeing the handsome face smiling as if satisfied, “Mmh, I’m…I’m going to…Ahhh, ah!” Phii Johan turned me around again and entered once more, his pace slowing down as if teasing me.

“Oh, no…please don’t.”

“Don’t finish yet, please.”

“I…can’t anymore…please. Mmh.” I still moaned in a lost voice with the slow rhythm of his body, but the deep thrusts were still going to the end, pulling out completely and then thrusting back in.

“Hmm, why don’t you try acting cute for me?”

“…”

“Mmm.” I bit my lip, gripping the bed sheet tightly, with the sensation of his large core moving in and out slowly, no…I can’t. I’m going to go crazy.

“Please…please.”

“…”

“Please…North can’t take it anymore.”

“Is that all?”

“…”

“…My dear.”

“Pl…please, a bit faster.”

“…”

“Yes…yes, please.” !!! “Ahhh!!” And the intense rhythm returned, a few thrusts to the same spot, and I released a cloudy white fluid, nearly losing consciousness from the intensity. Although I had finished, the other hadn’t yet. I tried to maintain some awareness, but soon felt his body twitch slightly as warmth filled me again, before he withdrew. I felt the warmth trickling down my leg.

Phii Johan pulled me into a hug, kissing away my tears before planting a kiss on my forehead. The familiar scent and warmth made me nuzzle into him a little more, before my consciousness finally slipped away.

“Sweet dreams.”

“…”

“The only beloved of mine.”

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 26 part 1

   Chapter 26: Only Mine

   “Phii…”

I called out softly to the person in front of me, furrowing my brows and pressing my lips tightly together, an overflow of emotions in my chest – joy, sadness, surprise, shock, all mixed together, before the corners of my eyes began to sting. I clenched the hand I had placed on the other’s shoulder.

“I didn’t tell you all this to make you cry.” Phii Joe said. At this moment, I was sitting on his lap, under the condition that one kiss was the price for answering one question. It took us a long time before I understood everything, and now, my lips hurt from all the kissing beforehand.

“Why…” I whispered softly, slowly leaning closer to him, shifting my hands from his shoulders into an embrace. Phii Joe tightened his hug and moved his hand to stroke my head in a comforting manner.

Why…

   Why did you wait for me for so long?

   Even though I’ve hardly done anything for him, why is he so good to me?

   Three years. For three whole years, someone has been waiting for me. Someone who sat across from me in the game shop late into the night, someone who had only me in his eyes, someone who thought of me almost all the time, someone willing to trade anything to keep my smile intact.

   “Huh…huh.” I let out a small sob as I reflected on Phii Joe’s words. I had no idea. I won’t say it was a mistake to date Ja, even though she eventually left me because at that time, I truly loved Ja. I had made my decision when I was with her, but…I just thought, why didn’t I know there was someone who loved me this much?

And now, I love him. All I can think is, why didn’t our timing match up sooner…

“Sorry…thank you.” I said with a sniffle, still crying. I had countless words I wanted to say, but they wouldn’t come together properly.

“Sigh…If I knew you’d cry like this, I wouldn’t have told you.”

“How could you not? It’s such a big deal…huh.”

“What’s bigger is you crying right now.” Phii Joe said with a tone of displeasure, then gently pushed me back a bit to look at my face. I couldn’t see him clearly through my tears, and he used his thumb to gently wipe them away.

“Why do you love North so much…huh, it’s been too long, you must have been in so much pain.” I said, still sobbing.

“It’s not as painful as seeing you cry now.” Phii Joe said, with a look of concern, “Forget it, stop crying now.”

“Okay, I’ll stop.” I said, still looking upset from crying, then I pressed my lips together trying to hold back my tears, “I won’t cry anymore.”

“Good.” Phii Joe said, giving me a faint smile.

“It’s a good thing I decided not to go to America back then.” I said, expressing what I was thinking now, “If I had gone to study in America, who knows how things would be now.” “I would’ve just visited America more often.” “…” I fell silent at his response. I never thought I would be this emotional, and that old question arose in my mind once again.

Why is he so good to me…

“Thank you, really, thank you for waiting all this time, thank you for not changing your mind.”

“…”

“North loves you, loves you a lot.”

“I love you a lot too.”

I immediately bowed my head when I heard the love confession from the person in front of me; my already pounding heart began to beat even more fiercely, to the point where I could feel the heat spreading to my ears. Not knowing what to do, I just buried myself in his embrace and wouldn’t let go.

Looking up to meet his eyes again, I hugged him even tighter as tears, from god knows where, started to flow once more.

“North…” Phii Joe called out.

No matter what, I’m not used to…Phii Joe calling my real name.

“Phii…you don’t have to call me by my name.” I said softly.

“Hmm? Then what should I call you?”

“Uh…anything else is fine.” I said. Calling me ‘you’ like before is better. Is it okay not to call me by my name? I’m completely overwhelmed by him already, even though we’re dating, but my heart can’t take it.

“…”

“My love.”

“Ha!?”

“My love.”

!! “No. No way!” I exclaimed loudly, isn’t this more embarrassing than calling me by my name? Are you trying to kill me? Are you trying to give me a heart attack?

   I looked up at the person in front of me, seeing a smile at the corner of his mouth which indicated he was very pleased. It seems Phii Joe really enjoys seeing me so embarrassed that I almost want to explode in embarrassment.

   “Why not?”

“Well…just no.” I didn’t know what else to say but to hug him tighter, feeling too flustered to do anything else. Before being gently pushed back a little from his embrace, our eyes met for a moment without me looking away, then his soft lips pressed down again. I slightly turned my face away due to the slight pain.

By the time I fully understood his story, we had kissed countless times…

The warm touch invaded again, and I responded to that touch. Our tongues danced together, creating an embarrassing sound, my heart still pounding heavily, warmth spreading all over my chest. I closed my eyes, one of his hands reached to press the back of my head closer as if feeling we weren’t close enough, while the other hand held mine.

The gentle kiss I received. I don’t know how long it lasted before it was reluctantly pulled away.

It had to be gentle because my lower lip had split again…

“Phii…”

“Hm?”

“It’s just…I don’t know what to do anymore, especially after hearing what you told me…” I expressed my concern. I loved him a lot, but I felt it might not be enough compared to everything that had passed. I promised myself I would do my best, but it still felt insufficient.

“I’ve already told you, haven’t I?”

“Just being by your side forever is enough.” “Is that possible?” “Yes, I promise I won’t go anywhere, I swear by everything.”

I made my promise before the tears could flow again, as if every feeling trapped in my chest was pouring out. From now on, no matter what happens, I promised I wouldn’t go anywhere. I would stay here as long as this place remains mine.

…

I’ve been living with Phii Joe for several days now. So much has happened since I moved, like the silly duck that Phii Joe said, “I bought so many things for him, but you ended up liking this duck.” After settling in, I decided to ask why he likes me, abiding by our previous agreement where each question was exchanged for a kiss.

At first, I thought I’d ask just one question, but then I just kept wanting to know more until I asked everything. After learning the whole story, I couldn’t hold back my tears.

I’ve become such an emotional person, crying until my eyes hurt.

I had no idea that the person in the Ferrari was Phii Joe, nor that the one who sat across from me at the table, appearing and disappearing, was him as well, and he was also the one who gave me that silly duck.

I was indescribably happy when I found out Phii Joe was the owner of the silly duck I had been curious about for so long. Honestly, I was very thankful, and I had already thanked him in person.

Having just moved in, I wasn’t quite used to the room yet, especially since my things were now here too. There was a new wardrobe in Phii Joe’s room that I hadn’t noticed before, which he gave to me. There was a desk and all sorts of things ready for me, and my motorcycle was sent back home because Phii Joe said he would take care of picking me up and dropping me off, which I felt very apologetic about, but I couldn’t argue. And hearing his stories helped me understand everything better, like when he came to pick me up from the bar incident. About the debt, Phii Joe said he didn’t stop me when I was acting out in his house; he could have but chose not to, so I would learn the consequences of getting drunk and being foolish. It worked well because I haven’t touched alcohol since then.

When I asked about the debt, Phii Joe just said to forget it, it’s just money. At first, he didn’t even have anything anyway. I thought he was just using it to threaten me, T^T

As for James…James is quite the scoundrel who used to tell me, “I’ll take care of you, North.” back when we were at the game shop, always inviting me out for Korean BBQ, bingsu, shabu-shabu, all sorts of buffets. Initially, I was really grateful to James, thinking how kind he was, but now I know…it was all Phii Joe’s money, and he was paying Phii Joe to take me out to eat.

James, why are you such a bad person…

We are in the same faculty, but I don’t really see James much because we’re in different years and faculties. Once you’re in your second year, you study in separate faculties, and James doesn’t care about seniority, doesn’t care about studying, doesn’t care about anything except alcohol. He just drinks and flirts with girls all day. I ran into him near the faculty’s coffee shop long after the semester started, and he looked shocked, saying, “Oh, didn’t you say you were going to America? Why were you lying?”

Lying about what? I just didn’t go, so what?

   And why am I even mad at James?

   “What time does your class end?” I turned to ask the person sitting next to me as the luxurious car pulled up in front of the engineering faculty. From now on, Phii Joe would probably drop me off like this every day.

“Half past six, and what time do you finish?” Phii Joe asked back. “Four, but I have cheer practice until ten.” I replied. “I’ll come and wait.”

“Yes, sir. Study hard.”

“Hmm.” Phii Joe said, then gave me a smile. I smiled back, reaching to open the door, but was pulled back by my arm first. He drew me close, leaned in, and gave me a gentle kiss, just a touch of the lips before letting go.

“Study hard.” He said, then flashed that slight smile he often does, and I always fell for that smile, feeling my heart beat faster again, my face starting to flush before I quickly opened the door to get out.

Good grief…

He’s never gentle with my heart at all.

But I like it, I really like this feeling, it’s so happy I want it to last forever.

As I was walking towards the lecture building, my phone rang. When I checked, I saw that it was my mom calling.

“Yes, Mom.” I answered the call and spoke into the phone.

(North, are you going to class today?)

   “Yes, I’m about to head to class now.”

(Oh, your aunt wanted me to tell you that Non’s condition has improved) my mom said. Non is my cousin’s newborn baby. He was born a while ago, but recently he wasn’t feeling well, so everyone at home was worried. I’m quite fond of my nephew too, though I haven’t had a chance to play with him yet, I’ve only seen pictures my mom and aunt sent to boast.

“Really? That’s great. I’ll find time to visit on Saturday, this week.”

(That’s good. Don’t forget the gold for the baby’s welcoming gift.)

   “Yes, Mom.” I agreed. “Oh, Mom, North has something to tell you.”

(What is it?)

   “North has a new partner now.” (Really? You didn’t get back together with Ja, did you?)

   “No, no.”

(That’s good. Don’t ever get back with her, ha, she broke up with you and then had the audacity to ask to reconcile, after all the effort, the morning and evening rides, feeding you almost every meal, and never missing a gift, then she breaks up on graduation day, terrible) my mom said, sounding irritated. When Ja dumped me, my mom was even angrier than I was; she was nearly ready to storm over to her house.

(So, who’s this new partner?)

   “But he’s a guy, Mom.”

(Oh, who is he then?)

   “His name is Phii Johan, he’s in his second year of medical school at our university, and he lives near our place too. You know, the big house that owns a lot of land around our area?”

(Ha! Really, son?)

   “Yes.”

(Oh dear, my son has landed himself in the rice pot. I’ve heard that the house has a grandson, and I was even thinking of presenting you to him on a tray.)

   “Mom, really?”

(Just kidding. But how did you guys end up together? I want to see what he looks like. Send me a picture.)

   “It’s a long story, I will tell it later. I’ll send some photos.”

(Send them, and is he handsome?)

   “Oh, handsome, very handsome.”

   (Really? When you were dating Jaja, you boasted to your mom like this too. Jaja wasn’t that cute, you were just showing off your girlfriend, weren’t you?)

   “Oh my. This is my boyfriend, you know.”

(Okay, you’re good, send the photos. I’ll show off to Aunt Nuch, and to the neighbor lady too, she’s always bragging about her daughter’s boyfriend.)

   “The neighbor lady? Mrs. Kaew, right?”

(Yes, her daughter just graduated. Her daughter’s boyfriend is a doctor, a surgeon. She brags about it morning and night about how rich her daughter’s boyfriend is. And she keeps asking me if my son is still not done with school, if he has a girlfriend yet, warning that he might not find one, look, her daughter is planning to get married and have kids. How much does an engineer earn? Is it enough? Her daughter’s boyfriend is a surgeon, earning several tens of thousands.)

   “And what did mom say back?”

(What’s all the fuss about my child? That bitch.)

   “Mom…take it easy.”

(Just kidding, I just give a dry smile and then call the mason to build a higher fence, so tired of seeing her face.)

   “Whose mom is this? She’s awesome.” I said, laughing. My mom is like this, her personality isn’t much different from mine, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, that’s for sure.

(Of course, are you really coming this Saturday? Bring your boyfriend too.)

   “Can I bring him?”

(Yes, yes, bring him, I’ll prepare some food.)

   “Okay, I’ll ask him first.”

(Okay, that way, I’ll clean the house too. But, is he really the grandson of that landlady?)

   “Yes, why?” (Nothing, I am just shocked, really shocked. That family is really rich, you know. The whole market talks about how handsome her grandson is, every girl wants him. I’ll brag about it all the way to the back of the market, watch me. The market landlady is also very kind, she’s waived the booth rental fee several times now without any complaint.)

   “Mom, don’t forget to pay the rent.”

(Oh, how about the house rent, I forgot to pay that too) my mom said casually, her forgetfulness matching mine.

“Please pay it, Mom, or we might get evicted. We won’t have a home.”

(Evicted? Alright, I’ll go pay it then.)

   “Okay, see you on Saturday.”

(Got it, don’t forget to bring your partner too.)

   “Yes, I love you, Mom.”

(I love you too) before my mom hung up. My mom is as easy going as I am, and she never restricted me from having a partner. When I was with Ja, my mom always gave advice and support, treating Ja almost like her own daughter, which is why she was so angry when Ja broke up with me as I mentioned earlier.

I try to picture Phii Joe at my house, meeting my mom and my aunt. I can’t really imagine it. But would he want to go to my house? If he’s okay with my family, that would be great. As for Mom and Aunt, they’re easy-going anyway. Okay, that’s settled.

And then there’s the question of how his family will react to me…

I walked out of the lecture hall feeling drained, getting nagged at for a long time makes one feel quite exhausted. The freshmen were gradually leaving, and there was a buzz from the group of girls. I scanned the area for the person who said they would wait for me.

I spotted Phii Joe sitting with James, and there was another senior with them. The girls were looking in their direction, whispering among themselves. I didn’t pay much attention, trying to navigate my way through the crowd. While squeezing through, I overheard the girls chatting:

“Is that Phii Johan? He’s even more handsome in person. I’ve only seen photos.”

“You’re kidding, I’m so embarrassed, why are they all so good-looking? Is that one from our faculty? I see he’s wearing a gear jacket, but I’ve never seen him before.”

“I like Phii Johan more but heard he has a partner. Look at his left wrist, he’s wearing gear.”

“Why would a doctor wear gear? Oh, his partner studies engineering.”

“Squeeeee, I’m so embarrassed right now.”

I pretended not to hear their comments, though inside I was quite flattered. It took a while to get out because, as I’ve mentioned before, the lecture hall was crowded, and when it was over, everyone was trying to push their way out. Even if you didn’t want to push, just standing in the front row would get you pushed out anyway.

“Here you are.” James immediately greeted me, “We were just talking about you. Joe got teased until he was fed up. Come here, let me tease you a bit.”

“Very funny, James. No need.” I replied. My friends were already teasing me enough as it was, “Did you wait long?” I asked Phii Joe.

“Just got here.” Phii Joe answered, “The professor just let us go.”

“But don’t classes end at half past six?”

“They do end at half past six.” Phii Joe said, “But the professor wouldn’t let me leave, made me do some work or something.”

“So, you got roped into some work at the faculty?” James asked, “Was that what you were complaining about on the phone earlier, about the professor being mad?” “Yeah, he used me, didn’t even give me an A, just a B last semester.” Phii Joe grumbled, “And I don’t know why he got mad at me. At first, everything was fine.”

“What did you do to upset the professor?” The guy sitting next to James asked.

“I told him I wasn’t available to do any work, I had to rush back, and he asked why I was in such a hurry. I said I needed to go and drink with friends, and then he got mad. Why would he be mad about that?”

“Maybe he was upset because you didn’t invite him to drink with you, Joe?”

“I did invite him, but he didn’t want to come. Doesn’t that mean he has no right to be mad?”

“Yeah, why is the professor so fussy about it?” The other guy said.

“Or maybe he’s more of a beer guy?” Phii Joe countered.

“Yeah, that could be it. Some people only drink beer, not liquor, you know.”

“What are you guys even talking about?” James said, shaking his head in mock disgust, “If the professor actually comes…”

“Then he should come, we’ll treat him.” Phii Johan said casually, “Seriously, are you really thinking of inviting a medical professor to drink with us? You can’t treat a professor to drinks, T^T.”

But…drink?

“Drinking?” I asked.

“Yes, I’m inviting.” James said, “You in? To celebrate your relationship, really, it’s something worth celebrating, the animal way, I mean. When we found out you were just talking, not even dating yet, Frank and I cried with joy.” I looked at the other guy next to James, oh, his name is Frank, right? “Now you’re actually dating. I’m so happy I don’t know what to do with myself, Joe.”

“Are you really inviting my boyfriend to drink with you?” “You’re talking about your ‘wife’ quite boldly, bastard.” James said with a slight chuckle, “Come on, you were going to come with us anyway.”

“Haven’t had a drink in a while, you invited.” Phii Joe replied, “But let me take the little one home first.”

“Aw, not coming together? We should celebrate your relationship with him there too.” Frank objected. “He wants to drink too, trust me.”

“Really?” Phii Joe turned to ask me.

“Uh…sure.” I said. I was fine either way. It had been a while since I last drank too. “Can I go in this outfit?” I asked James, who was from my faculty, since I was still in my cheering outfit, which was an engineering faculty shirt and sweatpants.

“Why not? It’s not like it’s a student uniform, and it might be nice that the bar is full of engineering shirts.” James said. He was also wearing an engineering shirt. Frank and Phii Joe, on the other hand, were in casual wear, probably having changed before coming.

“Are you sure you want to go?” Phii Joe asked me again.

“Yes, why? North doesn’t have to go if you don’t want to.” I said. If he just wanted to drink with his friends, I didn’t have to come.

“North, huh? Using your own name to refer to yourself.” James teased. I glanced at him with a slightly annoyed expression.

“No, I want you to come with me.” Phii Joe said simply, and then the four of us walked out from the engineering faculty area, with James and Frank heading to another car.

We settled at the furthest table in the bar, which was a regular place near the university, with live band music. Everyone ordered drinks and various foods.

“Finally, you two are together. Damn, I feel like I’ve just completed something in life.” James said his first sentence after the waiter left. “We’re like the original crew, right, Frank?” “Yeah, damn, it’s the best. I’m tearing up here, Joe. It feels like we’ve been through so much together, drank so much that we’re on the brink of liver cirrhosis. Can I request funds to make a vinyl banner with your couple’s picture to hang up at the university? Can we put it in front of the medical faculty and engineering faculty, maybe even mine too, just show it off everywhere.”

“That’s going too far, bastard.” Phii Joe laughed at Frank’s suggestion, and then the table conversation became about us, with James and Frank asking how it all happened, while Phii Joe let me do most of the talking.

“So, you got dumped?” James asked. I nodded in response. “Why did she break up?”

“She said…what was it…something like choosing someone with a future, so she went for another medical student.” I said, then took the drink Frank had mixed, swallowing it with difficulty. How did he mix it to make it so strong?

“Oh, why? Does she think the engineering faculty have no future?” James exclaimed, “Got dumped because the salary is lower, huh? That’s sad, you animal, Joe, how much does a doctor earn?”

“Sixty thousand, not including overtime.” Phii Joe replied, raising his glass of liquor.

“Damn, that’s a lot. And what about an engineer at a company?”

“Twenty thousand for a fresh graduate.”

“Wow, that’s a three times difference, North.” James said, turning to me, his face suddenly looking gloomy. I felt down too because we were in the same faculty, “But we have less work, it’s way more comfortable.”

“Oh, so compared to the workload, we have it easier, right, Phii?” I asked.

“No, when I said less work, I meant job positions. Not many people are taking up engineering jobs now, there are so many graduates each year, it’s depressing.” James said before taking another drink, it seemed more like he was sharing his woes, “I think we should start a business together, North, let Joe fund it.”

“What kind of business, Phii?”

“Selling Hainanese chicken rice.”

“…”

 

   NORTH HOW MUCH IS YOUR LOVE CHAPTERS HOME

NORTHHOWMUCHISYOURLOVE, Chapter 25 part 2

“What about you, Joe, didn’t you meet anyone in LA for a whole year?” Frank asked, “I thought you’d be partying more than you did back in Thailand.”

“Yeah, I was wilder there.” I admitted truthfully. Whether it was women, alcohol, cigarettes, or other things, I also studied and worked more while in LA. My dad even said if I kept it up, he could hand over the business to me soon. “You called to tell us about it, you really lived life to the fullest, top of your class, did well at work, and made the most of your youth.” James said, “But you still came back to die over the same old issue.”

“You’re good at twisting the knife, aren’t you?” I said with a sigh, “Has he broken up with his girlfriend yet?”

“Not yet, saw a picture of them having hot pot together yesterday.” James said, “They’ve been dating for over a year now.”

“Fuck.”

“And what about you? After meeting so many people there, wasn’t there anyone you clicked with?” Frank asked again.

“No.” I met many people, at school, at work, and when I went out, “I just couldn’t open my heart to anyone.”

“You don’t want to get serious with anyone, then.”

“Do I look like I want to be like this?”

“So, in short…you still can’t move on, right? Even after not seeing him for a year.” James repeated. I was silent for a moment before nodding slightly in affirmation, “At this rate, you might never forget him in your lifetime.”

“Sigh…” I exhaled to release the frustration building inside, “I don’t know, James, I like him, I really do, and the more I think about him now, the more I want to see him. Why is it like this?”

“Sigh, it’s exhausting just listening to you. If you want to see him, then go see him.”

I looked at the snack packet being handed to me in confusion. Eventually, I decided to return to the game shop. When the kid came to the shop and saw someone sitting at the table opposite, he left for a while and then came back with the snack packet.

On the packet was a note that read: ‘Please stay and keep me company like before. I’m scared of ghosts, TT’

   Is this intentional teasing or what…

“Seriously, man, I think he knows and he’s teasing you.” Frank said, laughing as I smoked beside him, “Damn, who could move on from this? That’s cruel to your friend.”

“Yeah, exactly. No mercy for my friend at all, please have some sympathy, North, have some heart for your friend’s friend.”

“You guys are too good at teasing.” I said, feeling annoyed, while exhaling grey smoke, “Why do you do this?”

“Isn’t that just how the junior is? But when someone’s smitten, we’ll fall for anything they do.”

“…Damn it.”

And…my attempt to move on failed yet again.

I went back to living like before I went to LA, stopping my bad habits and having only the junior in my life as usual. But something new was added: university entrance exams. I wasn’t sure what course I wanted to study, so my mother suggested I try for the Faculty of Medicine, and when I got in, she was ecstatic. So, I decided to study there, too lazy to apply for another program anyway.

“You’ve held out well, Joe, liking the junior all the way through high school.” James said.

“Yeah, but once I get into university, I won’t go see him anymore.” I replied, thinking that with time, I might get used to it. Once in university, I probably wouldn’t go back to see the junior again.

No matter how many times I tried to let go, I always found myself back in the same place.

No matter what, the junior was the only one I ever wanted to get serious with. And I…almost stopped hoping for anything else.

So…I completely gave up on getting serious with anyone else.

When I started university, I met people like Hill, who was very capable, Tonfah, who was good-hearted, and Arthit, who was the biggest jerk. I still acted like I used to, partying without caring much about others, being quite the playboy, but I stopped initiating with others because I was bored. And I did what I had planned; I didn’t go back to see the junior.

And sometimes when I thought of the junior, the feeling was more of fondness than pain. I didn’t quite understand why that was.

(Joe, do you know about the junior?) The words from James on the phone made me raise my eyebrows in surprise. Both James and Frank were studying at the same university as me, James in the Faculty of Engineering, and Frank in Political Science.

“…”

“Why?”

(The junior got a scholarship to study in America.)

   “Really?”

(Yeah, today’s his graduation day at his school.)

   “And why are you telling me this? I’ve already said I won’t go see him.”

(Yeah, I know, but you’ve liked him for so long, are you really not going to see him? He’s going to be on the other side of the world, man. Isn’t it good to see him one last time, to congratulate him on graduating?)

   …

And before I knew it, I found myself driving back to the same place I hadn’t been to for a year. I barely knew anything about what the kid had been up to. I didn’t know how he’d been doing since James closed the game shop, but from what I saw on Instagram, he was still posting pictures with his girlfriend, dating from the fourth year to the sixth year of high school.

It’s impressive that he could study abroad in America on a scholarship. So from now on, the distance between us would be even greater.

Whatever, it wouldn’t have changed anything anyway.

I walked into the school hosting the graduation ceremony. I didn’t bring flowers or a gift. I just wanted to see if he was doing well, that’s all, to see how happy he would be having graduated, secured a scholarship, and still being in a good relationship with his girlfriend.

I saw his friends standing by the booth for the sixth graders, but there was no sign of him. He should be with his friends, right? Where did he go?

♣♣♣

“North. I want you to understand. We’re all grown up now. We need to choose someone with a future. We can’t just date for fun like when we were kids, right?”

“…”

“You…understand me, don’t you? You’ve always understood me, haven’t you?”

“Uh-huh, I understand.” I said, clenching my jaw to keep the feelings that were welling up inside at bay, my hands gripping each other tightly. I was sitting on a stone bench by the building, and Jaja was standing in front of me, saying the very thing I didn’t want to hear.

Jaja was breaking up with me…

   “I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me. You did everything for me, but…”

“You’ve chosen Temp, haven’t you?” I looked up at her, her face full of tears, her eyes and words full of guilt towards me.

“Uhmm. I’m sorry.” “It’s okay, I understand.” I forced a smile, “Then, could you tell Temp to promise me that he’ll take care of you in my place?”

“Uhmm…I understand.”

“Good luck.”

“Good luck then, goodbye.” She said, her voice trembling. I looked down, only seeing her feet as she walked away, since everyone was busy with the graduation ceremony, so there was no one else here.

I looked at the bouquet of flowers beside me, which I had brought to congratulate her on graduating, but she didn’t take them and decided to express what had been on her mind for a long time.

I had somewhat realized that her love for me had been fading ever since she met that guy, but I chose to overlook it and continued to take care of her as best as I could.

Why, though…

When my eyes started to feel hot, I quickly wiped away the tears.

I shouldn’t be sad on such a celebratory day. If I go back to meet with friends like this, it would definitely spoil the evening’s celebration.

My heart felt like it was being squeezed tightly, and my hands, which were tightly clasped, began to loosen. I didn’t even have the strength to stand, why, had everything I did been in vain, was it all worthless, what else should I understand? I just didn’t understand anything anymore.

Damn…why is it like this?

Soft sobbing

…

Because I saw that my friend wasn’t with the group, I walked around looking for them for a while until I found them sitting there. Then her girlfriend seemed to be saying something to her before walking off, but just that was enough to guess what happened.

I looked at the scene in front of me; so many feelings were mixing inside me. I once said I absolutely love her smile, and I didn’t want it to disappear, so why did that girl…

Her smile, damn, it’s so precious to me.

Why doesn’t she take care of it at all?

I let out a frustrated sigh. I hate seeing her look like she’s about to cry, especially when she’s given everything for that woman. It seems she won’t leave this place easily, and with her nature of not wanting to worry others, she probably won’t go to meet her friends until she sorts out her feelings.

I feel like I need to do something.

I quickly dialed the last number on my phone, waiting for a moment until James picked up.

(What’s up, did you meet your junior?)

   “James, he got dumped by his girlfriend.”

(Huh!? What?)

   “He got dumped by his girlfriend, what should I do?”

(Oh, no, why did she do that? Why treat my friend like this?)

   “What should I do? I don’t want him to cry.”

(Go comfort him.)

   “Damn, where would he know me from?”

(Then buy him something, he might be happy with that, write him a little card too.)

   “Where did you buy it?” (There should be some shops around there selling stuff. Mostly on the last day of the term, they like to set up stalls selling gifts, but it’s pretty late, so they might have all packed up by now.)

   “Uh.” I hung up and rushed out to check the shops as James had suggested. Indeed, all the shops around there were closed, probably because it was so cold. I then spotted one shop just about to close its doors.

“Don’t close yet.” I called out. The shopkeeper turned around, looking bewildered.

“Oh, young man, are you buying something? Sorry, but I’ve sold out of everything.”

“Not even one item left?” I asked. Otherwise, there wouldn’t be any shops open. Driving to another place to buy something wouldn’t make it in time.

“Well, there is one item left. Want to have a look?”

“Yes.” I answered immediately. The shopkeeper disappeared inside, then came back out holding a duck plush toy.

What in the world is this duck thing…

“Want it? I’ll bag it up for you.” She offered.

“Uh…okay.” I sighed slightly before accepting the bag with the toy. Why does the first gift I buy for my junior have to be this duck with a turned-up beak?

“Two hundred and fifty baht, and do you want a card? It’s on the house.”

“Yes.” I said, pulling out my wallet. The shopkeeper handed me some paper and a pen, but when I checked my wallet, I found no cash. “Do you take cards?”

“What kind of card? I don’t really deal with cards.”

“Uh…”

“You should start carrying cash, Joe. Not every shop takes cards.” Hill’s words echoed in my mind. At that moment, I never thought I’d be in a shop that doesn’t accept cards.

I sighed in annoyance, took off my left wristwatch, and handed it over. The other party took it, looking puzzled.

“I don’t have any cash on me. Can I trade with this?”

“Oh…wait, young man, I can’t accept something this valuable.” The shopkeeper shouted after me, but I didn’t care much. I walked back into the school, wrote a little on the card, and left the duck plushie and card for my junior.

♣♣♣

“You are North, right? Someone left this for you.” I looked up to the voice calling me. It was a schoolgirl from the same school, though I didn’t recognize her much. In her hand was a plush toy…a duck?

She handed it to me. I didn’t fully understand, but I accepted it.

“Thanks. Did someone ask you to give it to me?”

“I don’t know, it got passed along through several people, I guess. I’ve got to go.” She said, and then she walked away. I looked at the stuffed toy in my hand, puzzled.

A duck…?

Is it supposed to be a duck? Why does it look like a pig with those puffy cheeks? I couldn’t help but laugh at its funny face. There was a piece of paper attached to it, with the message, “Smile a bit :)”

   I found myself smiling broadly when I read the note. The person who sent this duck must be really sweet, and it somewhat lifted the gloom in my heart. It felt like someone was waiting for my smile, if not for anything else, at least this silly duck’s owner.

I let out a big sigh, took some time to compose myself, and decided to throw away the bouquet I had bought; it wouldn’t be needed anymore. Then, holding the goofy duck, I went back to my friends.

“Hey, North, so what did she want to talk to you about?” “Oh, she broke up with me.” I replied nonchalantly, and my friends looked shocked. “What’s with the shock? It’s not that surprising. I kind of knew it was coming.”

“I am shocked at how chill you are.”

“Whatever, let it go. Look at this duck. Isn’t it cute?” I showed them the duck, and both Tae and Ball burst out laughing.

“It’s cute, but why does it have such a mischievous look? Did someone give it to you?”

“Yeah, someone did. They even wrote a card.” I said, showing them the note attached to the duck. “Cute, right?”

“Wow, I bet they like you. The handwriting is pretty amazing.” Teak said, “You’re quite popular, huh?”

“Nah.” I shook my head slightly. Then, I wanted to know who sent the duck, so I went looking for the person who had given it to me earlier. I kept asking around but only got the answer that it wasn’t someone from school and they had already left.

“Couldn’t find them in the end?”

“Yeah, it’s a pity. I really wanted to thank them.” I said with a bit of disappointment. It was already late in the evening, and everyone was starting to head home. We had plans to continue celebrating with our classmates, so we had to go.

I pulled out my phone and opened Instagram, looking at my profile filled with photos of me and Jaja. I decided to delete all those pictures and posted a single photo of the silly duck along with the card as the only picture on my Instagram.

I captioned it, ‘Smiling now : ) thank you #TheOwnerOfTheSillyDuck’

   Whoever that person is, I was genuinely thankful to them. From then on, I cherished that silly duck and the card. I even liked the duck so much that I took a photo of it and set it as my LINE profile picture, and I couldn’t help but smile every time I saw it.

…

I glanced at my phone screen, at Instagram which I hadn’t checked in a while. From having over a hundred photos, now the owner of the IG had deleted them all, leaving just one picture – the one of the duck and the card I had left.

‘Smiling now : ) thank you #TheOwnerOfTheSillyDuck’

   I thought I was over him, but I drove all the way back there. Initially, I just didn’t want him to cry, but now, encountering this, it made me realize…

That I…haven’t changed at all.

Not since the day I realized I fell for that smile…

I returned to the bar near the university around past ten at night, too lazy to call any friends to join me. I let myself drown in my feelings, the sharp taste and burn of alcohol going down my throat, not knowing how many glasses I had, along with a cigarette in my hand, touching my lips, inhaling the smoke and blowing it out. It took a while before I started to get drunk, but smoking made my mind cloud over faster.

He broke up with his girlfriend…

But now he’s going to be far away from me instead.

Why does our timing never align?

When I heard the incoming call sound from my phone, I stubbed out my cigarette and picked up the phone.

‘Incoming call: Hill’

   I answered,

“Yeah.”

(Joe. You left your MacBook, do you need it? Should I bring it over?)

   “No need.” (Where are you? Why is it so noisy?)

   Bar

(Drunk?)

   “Yeah.”

(Alone?)

   “Yeah.”

(Hey, going to drink alone until you get drunk, is that okay?)

   “No, I’m not okay at all, Hill.”

(Wait, I’ll come find you. Where are you?)

   “Midnight.”

(Alright, I’m coming. Should I call Fah and Arthit too?)

   “Up to you.”

(Okay.)

   Then Hill hung up. It’s good that Hill is coming; I’m in no condition to drive. Shortly after, Hill arrived and sat across from me, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked at me with confusion.

“What happened? Why would you drink to this extent?”

“I don’t know, Hill. I don’t understand myself.” I said before taking another sip from my drink, then lit a cigarette and put it in my mouth. “I just don’t get it, Hill.”

“You’re completely wasted.”

“Sigh, why, Hill, why the hell…”

“I don’t know either, just calm down, Joe.”

“I hate feeling like this, I really don’t like this feeling, damn it.” I started to ramble, swearing out of frustration, and the person across from me looked concerned. If it were James or Frank, they might understand my state, but for Hill and the other two, I’ve never told them about ‘him’. “Yeah, Fah’s got some business to attend to, so he can’t come out, but he said to call if you need help. As for Arthit, he’s racing and will come after he’s done, so he asked me to order some drinks for him.”

“Ha. Even if I didn’t say anything, the table’s already full.” I said.

“Are you going to drink all this by yourself, and smoke too?”

“Want one?” I asked before offering the cigarette pack to Hill. Hill took one, smoked it, but didn’t touch the alcohol.

“You look terrible, Joe. I’ve never seen you like this.” Hill remarked.

“Hmm. Not surprising, I haven’t been like this in a long time either.” I said, exhaling another puff of grey smoke, “Hill.”

“Hmm?”

“Have you ever wanted someone to be in your life, but it just couldn’t happen?”

“…”

“Without any conditions, you’d give them everything just to see them smile.”

“…”

“But why, why can’t I have this person by my side?”

“Joe…damn.” Hill was silent, listening to me ramble for a while before letting out a sigh, “If I said I am in the same boat as you, would you believe me?”

“Really? For someone who doesn’t care about anyone like you?”

“It’s less believable for someone like you if you wanted to tell. Go ahead, tell me.” Hill said, and in my drunken state, I spilled everything about the girl to Hill. He listened intently, “Hard to believe someone as carefree as you could have something like this. Is this why you said you’d never get serious with anyone?”

“Probably. If it’s not him…I don’t want anyone.”

“Hmm…I understand.” Hill nodded slightly. Hill was quite good at keeping his feelings to himself, in other words, he was patient, and the pained look in his eyes I saw wasn’t lying. “Tell me yours then, your story.” I said, sliding the glass of alcohol towards him. Hill hesitated for a moment before letting out another sigh, grabbed the glass of pure liquor, drank several glasses, and began telling me his story.

“His name is Ter, right?” I asked, leaning back on the sofa and closing my eyes, my head throbbing, “Easter, as in East, huh? That’s fitting, and North means North too.”

“Yeah, exactly, and he’s going to study in America?” Hill asked, his eyes slightly squinting from the intoxication. Hill could hold his liquor pretty well, “That’s too bad, especially since he’s now single.”

“Actually, I could’ve bought the scholarship to America and removed his name from it, but since he wants to go…If things keep going like this, I’ll probably be flying back and forth to America often to see him. Hopefully, he won’t find a boyfriend or girlfriend there.”

“And what about you? Got dumped, huh?” I asked.

“Yeah, probably, I wouldn’t be surprised if he did feel that way. I kind of hate myself too.”

“Ha, nothing ever goes as planned, does it, Hill?” I said, clinking my glass with the one across from me again. “We’re both a mess, totally screwed.”

“Sigh, so what are you going to do next, Joe?”

“Don’t know. Maybe just let it go like this. I can’t follow him to America, my dad would kill me if I dropped out of university now.” I said before taking another drink. “Or should I just buy out his scholarship?”

“Are you crazy? Would you ruin his dream?”

“Just saying. Who would actually do that?” I said. “Come to think of it, you’ve waited a long time, yet you’ve never been able to let him go. How do you manage that?” “There’s nothing to it, Joe. I just can’t let go. I end up back where I started, just like you.”

“Hmm.” I responded, before we ordered more drinks and continued drinking for a while. The bad feelings didn’t go away, but it was still better than nothing, and I believed I would continue to feel this way.

I asked about Ter from Hill, and he asked about North from me. Both of us were drunk to the point where we could barely keep our composure. I looked at the picture of the person on Hill’s phone.

“Cute.”

“Yeah, your friend is cute too.” Hill said, handing the phone back to me, equally drunk. “His name’s North, right?”

“Yeah, Hill.”

“Huh?”

“If it’s tomorrow, can you pretend you’ve forgotten about today? Everything, including what I told you.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want to think about it either.”

“Hmm.”

Arthit looked at the two friends in a drunken state, puzzled. Hill had called to say that Johan was drinking alone and seemed quite down. After finishing his race at the track, he rushed over.

What’s with this drunken mess…

And with the table full of liquor like this, are you two drinking it all?

“Huff. Come out, both of you look like dogs.”

(Are you both wasted? I specifically asked Hill to look after Joe, why did you end up getting drunk with him too?)

   “I don’t know, but for sure, both Joe and Hill are knocked out. Can you imagine how much they’ve had?”

(Oh…I guess the bar will be out of liquor today. I’ll head out, wait there. Don’t you start drinking too.)

   “Got it.”

Arthit hung up with a sigh. Instead of enjoying a drink after winning a car race, he had to go pick up these two.

And who are Ter and North that these two were babbling about?

Tonfa rushed to the bar in his car after receiving the call from Arthit, entering the place worriedly looking for his two friends who were completely out of it. Johan was a tough drinker, needing cigarettes to get drunk, and Hill wasn’t much different. Tonfah guessed that the liquor covering the table now was just the tip of the iceberg; the staff must have cleared the table several times already.

“Should we take them home? Did you pay the bill yet?” Tonfah asked, seeing the high prices.

“I’ve already paid. Let’s go back. You take Hill.” Arthit said. He had already settled the bill before Tonfah arrived, shocked at the nearly forty thousand baht bill. Damn, these guys really drank.

Arthit helped Johan up from the table, while Fah supported Hill. The four of them parted ways to go home. The next day, Johan woke up on his sofa, unable to remember anything about Ter, but Hill remembered North. Both were then forced by Tonfah to get checked for any health issues that might arise from excessive drinking.

As for Arthit…he had already forgotten the names Ter and North.

♣♣♣

I decided to decline the scholarship to America in the end. Initially, I thought I’d give it a shot. I’m not an academic type, and I had to put in a lot of effort to win that scholarship, but in the end, I didn’t go because I was worried about my mom. I could go after finishing my bachelor’s degree.

At first, I got into engineering in the first round of exams. I heard Jaja say she chose Temp because he got into medical school, saying she chose someone with a brighter future. I understood that ‘future’ meant job security, and being a doctor fit that bill.

I gave up my spot in the engineering program in the first round to go for the scholarship to America, but even after securing it, I hesitated again. What about my mom? How worried would she be? Maybe now wasn’t the time to leave. So, I relinquished the scholarship and reapplied to the engineering faculty in the final round.

When I got in during the last round, it was literally the last minute; the semester was about to start. This meant I couldn’t find a dorm in time; Tae and Ball already had their accommodations sorted. I had to find whatever dorm was available at the time and ended up living alone.

Fortunately, the dormitory randomly assigned roommates. There were many who came from the provinces alone and couldn’t afford the rent, needing someone to share the cost with. That’s how I ended up rooming with Ter, who was from out of town, alone. He didn’t know anything about this place, and to be honest, neither did I. I am from around here but never actually lived here.

Before the start of our first year, Ter told me about a senior doctor who was pursuing him. When I listened, I tried my best to give advice and support. Ter and that doctor had a really complicated story. I knew Ter wasn’t telling me everything, but I didn’t press because it was up to him how much he wanted me to know. As I began to understand things better, I saw that the doctor was actually a good person and really loved Ter. I started rooting for them. And on the day I saw Ter and the doctor publicly declare they were dating, it stirred up my feelings again.

“Why are you standing out here in the cold, you’ll catch a chill.” I said when I noticed Ter standing absentmindedly on the balcony for a long time. He was slightly startled. “What’s with the sudden cold? Because we’re near the mountains?”

“Probably. Why don’t you know, you’re a local.” Ter asked.

“My home isn’t near the mountains.” I replied. “Ter, can you close the window? I’m cold.” Ter closed the window and came back inside.

“What are you doing?” Ter asked.

“Cleaning the room.” I answered.

“It’s already clean.”

“It can be cleaner.”

Ter sighed at my response because sitting idle just made him think about the doctor. So, he got up to clean the room even though it was already clean. It seemed like Ter’s doctor had disappeared, and Ter had been looking gloomy for a couple of days.

“Aren’t you going to work at the pub?” I asked. I knew that before the semester started, Ter had been working at a pub, where he met the doctor.

“I’ve already taken the photos. He said the job’s done, so I don’t need to come anymore.” Ter said, looking like he was zoning out again. His mind must have been full of various thoughts.

“You don’t look okay.” I said.

“Yeah, I’m really not okay.”

“No sign of the medical student?” I teased. For some reason, teasing Ter was just too fun; even a little tease would make him flustered. “Right, he’s vanished, it’s been two days now.”

And then Ter and I talked for a while before he excused himself to take a shower. As I was lounging in the room, I heard a knock at the door.

“Coming.” I shouted, then got up to open the door, facing someone I didn’t recognize. I looked up, puzzled, and he looked back at me, seemingly surprised that I was the one opening the door.

“…”

“Uh…who are you looking for?”

It had been two days since Hill disappeared. Normally, his disappearance wouldn’t be an issue, but what was worrying was the situation at home. He wasn’t at the condo, his car was gone too, and he wasn’t answering calls.

Hill…do you know how worried Nong Ter is about you? He’s been calling me morning, noon, and night.

And then, out of the blue, the number that had been unreachable for almost two days called back. I raised an eyebrow in surprise when I saw that, quickly answering the call without even having the chance to speak first.

(Joe, I want to see Ter.)

   “Seriously, that’s the first thing you say to me after calling?”

(Go pick up him and bring him to me, I can’t drive right now.)

   “Fine. Aren’t you going to explain anything? You’ve got everyone worried.”

(Thanks, but can you help out?)

   “And if I say no?”

(Just go, and you’ll find something good.)

   “What’s that?”

(Trust me, just go pick up Ter.)

   “Okay, okay.” Why do I always get roped into this kind of stuff? I drove to the dorm where Ter was staying, guided by the location Hill sent, walked up to the room number he indicated, and stood there, somewhat annoyed, before knocking on the door.

   “Coming.” I heard from inside, then the door opened.

!!

   North…?

   Why did I end up here…

   “…”

“Um…Are you looking for someone?”

“Is Ter here?” I asked.

“Oh, yes, he’s taking a shower. I’ll go tell him.” The junior said before turning to go back inside. “You can come in if you want.”

“No, just tell Ter to hurry up.” I said, then stepped back to wait by the door.

Why did you end up here? Weren’t you supposed to study abroad in America? Being here means you’re studying here, right? And sharing a room with Ter, no less.

   What the hell am I feeling…

   “Phii Johan.” I heard Ter call out, “Why are you smiling?”

“Nothing.” I replied, straightening up from the wall, “Just saw something good.”

…

“You’ve made up your mind for sure, right? You’re done getting involved with others?” Hill asked, reiterating a question he had asked me many times before, while things between Hill and Ter were going well. I decided to stop messing around and start pursuing North seriously, especially since he was no longer with his girlfriend. And he was right here, not on the other side of the world as I had once thought.

“Finally, I have my chance.” “…”

“The chance I’ve been waiting for three years.”

“But are you sure? Why not go for it now?” Hill asked.

“You know how I get when I’m stressed with work. I don’t want to stress him out with my work issues. Plus, I don’t have much free time.” I said honestly, because my workload had been increasing, so I decided not to approach her just yet.

“Hill, look after him for me, okay?”

“Got it. But about the money, you don’t have to, I can support Ter.” Hill said, picking up the black card I had just given him.

“I feel bad that as his almost-boyfriend, I have to let someone else take care of him.”

“Yeah, it’s up to you. When will your work be finished?”

“After coming back from Boston.” I said, the plan being to keep working until the big project in Boston was done. After that, work would lighten up, “Take care of him, Hill, buy him whatever he wants.”

“Yeah, I understand.”

“And send me some pictures of him.”

“Got it.”

One night, while I was working at my condo, out of nowhere, I got a call from Hill.

(Joe. Are you free?)

   “Not really.”

(Your junior’s got into some trouble at a bar.)

   “Ha!” (He went out drinking, got drunk maybe, and then got into a fight with…uh, from what his friend told Ter, probably the new boyfriend of his exgirlfriend.)

   “…”

(It sounds like it was a big fight. Besides the bar demanding compensation for the damages, there’s a chance it might escalate to the university level, which could lead to suspension or even expulsion. But if you’re not free, I’ll go myself.)

   “I’ll go.”

“Which bar is he at?”

 

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