MONSTERNEXTDOOR, Chapter 05: Not showing oneself doesn’t mean one doesn’t exist. It just means existing only with those you trust.
As I thought.
The next morning, as soon as I opened my door, I found a jasmine garland hanging on the door handle, plus the usual pink Pocky bag and pink Post-it.
‘Please don’t be angry, guardian spirit. I won’t make noise again.’
It was the first Post-it in a week that I crumpled and threw straight into the trash.
Who would play such a crazy prank?
Today, I wasn’t going to university. I just wanted to buy some noodles from nearby and eat them, then probably binge-watch some series in my room. I slid down the elevator from the tenth floor, ordered a bowl of beef noodles at the front of the shop. The weather was great today. If I were an active person, I’d be out jogging, but for a turtle-like me, running? I’d rather stay in my room.
I yawned widely while watching a black dog wagging its tail in front of a sausage cart nearby.
“Two sticks of sausages, please.”
Two sausages were in my hand, and the black dog looked up at me with big, bright eyes, wagging its tail excitedly when it saw me pull out the large sausages from the bag.
Not wanting it to get hit by a car, I moved away from the road, squatted down on the concrete in front of the dorm, and the dog ran up to me, mouth open to grab the sausage, but I held it back, pushing its wet nose away. If it ate it like that, it would need a trip to the vet before it could do any good.
Wait, I’ll take the stick out first.”
Once the stick was removed, I placed the sausage on the ground and watched it eat with delight.
This wasn’t the first time I bought sausages for the dog in front of the dorm. It’s not a stray, but a dog well-known to the residents named Charcoal, a Dalmatian with bright eyes whose owner doesn’t take much care, so it often comes around here begging for food.
Charcoal was like me, being black, people didn’t give it much love, but it was happy running around alone without a pack. As for me, I’m a human who doesn’t need special attention, just content in my own world.
But maybe I’ve been too much in my own world that the creatures next door thinks I’m a “ghost.”
After having breakfast and feeding Charcoal, I went back up to my room as usual.
I poured the shredded chicken into the bowl, mixed in hot rice with water until it became congee. My mother once scolded me for eating strange things, ordering shredded chicken but eating it as congee, but congee has a different taste from shredded chicken soup. So I’m content eating it this way.
I walked over to the chair in front of my study desk where there was a small laptop, about to start watching a series, but then I heard a knock at my door. I blinked, looking at the dark shadow under the door crack, furrowing my brows for a while. The owner of that shadow knocked on the door again.
And that made me start to feel suspicious.
Who is it… definitely not Phii Godt because he would just leave something and go.
My room doesn’t have a peephole, so I couldn’t tell who was knocking, or if it was someone from the dorm.
Knock, knock
I stayed silent, holding my breath as if I wasn’t in the room, even though I had just come back.
Knock, knock, knock, knock
The knocking became more rapid. This time, I closed my eyes tightly. Since I’ve been here, no one has ever knocked on my door, it’s rare enough to count. I sat still, holding the bowl of chicken congee, until the knocking stopped.
Then voices started talking instead.
“What’s up, Wan?”
“I want to know if there’s really someone living next to you, Godt.”
That’s how I found out the mysterious shadow belonged to Phii Wan, the friend of the creature next door who seems to be quite curious about me. The garland at the door must have been his doing, because Phii Godt wouldn’t play such tricks. Besides, if Phii Godt was afraid of ghosts, he wouldn’t be talking to me every night.
“Where is Godt?”
“He’s been at uni since early morning.”
“Then why do you have to knock like that? He might come open it.”
“I’m curious, Beert. Godt goes out to talk to this junior every day, they haven’t even seen each other’s faces, don’t even know each other.
Don’t you think it’s strange?”
“Nah, it’s good he doesn’t come out.”
“Why?”
“Our dear friend has been so loud for a month.”
“I just wanted to know if he is a good or bad ghost. It’s not like I’m into Godt and followed him here.”
Crazy.
I’ve been here a month before them, why would they think I followed him? Besides, I’ve never even seen Phii Godt’s face, not just his face, I’m not even sure if he really exists.
“Why would you think that?”
“It’s just strange.”
“He is not a bad ghost, I just saw him giving sausages to a dog downstairs.”
Ah, so Phii Beert saw me then.
“Hah! You saw that?”
“Yeah, I went down to buy some noodles, and then I followed him back here.”
“What does the junior look like?”
“Well… very pale, almost glowing.”
The conversation between them fell silent.
“Really like Ju-on then.”
They burst into laughter at Phii Wan’s comment.
The sound of the door closing next door signaled that they had gone back inside.
Phii Wan’s intrusion caught me off guard, but honestly, I’m not afraid of them seeing me; I go out to classes and come back, interact with friends and seniors normally. What I’m more afraid of is Godt.
I’m not ready to face him yet, because right now, I enjoy talking to him from the balcony like this. If we meet face-to-face, expectations start to form, reactions and expressions become visible, and you start to know whether they like or dislike your actions through their face and eyes.
We two, we live in different worlds. He has his social circle. I have my small world. He can’t leave his friends’ society behind. I don’t want to leave my small world either. Our meeting would make both of us uncomfortable, so talking only through the balcony is the best option.
I watched series until almost eleven, before hearing the chime from the balcony. It was then I realized I’d been so engrossed that I forgot to eat. I opened the balcony door, and the greeting from the creature next door came instantly.
“Have you eaten yet, little turtle?”
“Sure.”
“Want to eat together?”
He said this while I heard the sound of him opening a food container. “Why do you eat dinner so late?”
“I was playing football, just finished showering, I’m super tired.”
The creature next door plays football too? I thought he only specialized in building noise.
“Then wait a bit. I’ll go heat up some rice.”
I hurried back inside to heat up a Seven Eleven rice box that I had bought to keep in case I felt too lazy to go out. Once it was warm, I came out to the balcony with a cold bottle of water. Today, the breeze on the balcony was gentle, and the chime from next door was tinkling softly.
“What’s the lonely one eating?”
“Fried rice.”
“From Seven Eleven?”
“Yes.”
“Eating it often isn’t good, way too much sodium.”
“I don’t eat it often. I eat fried rice.” My words made the other person go silent.
“So that means you’re just messing with me then.”
I let out a soft laugh.
“What kind of fried rice?”
“Crab fried rice, and what about you, what are you eating?”
“Food, obviously.”
“What kind of food?”
“Sushi.”
“Sushi from the place near the dorm?”
“Yeah, it’s good. Have you ever tried it?”
And our nightly conversation today was about the food around the university area. Whether it was the sushi place I occasionally buy from, the hotpot near the dorm, the eatery where Khun Godzilla said he likes to order their spicy shrimp curry, the bingsu place downstairs, and others.
It was the first time I sat and ate with someone else, chatting while eating.
“Phii Godt.”
“Hmm.” Today, Khun Godzilla seemed tired, probably from playing football and sweating, so he wasn’t talking much, plus he had woken up early.
“Phii Wan hung a garland in front of my room.”
“Huh?” He sounded surprised when he heard that, “Really?”
“Yeah.”
“The jerk, he was just fooling around, but he did it seriously.”
“I’m not mad or anything, but today Phii Wan knocked on my door.”
“What! Fck.”
“And Phii Beert saw me.”
“Fucccck.”
He swore in a series. After that, there was some rustling sound, and then I heard him shouting at his friends, realizing he was calling Phii Wan.
“What the fck are you doing knocking on his door… Yeah, you shouldn’t… shouldn’t do that, and you, Beert, don’t be a cheat, I haven’t even seen the junior yet and you’ve already seen him… if you do that again, I’ll curse you all with an F!”
Then he went quiet.
“I’m sorry,” his voice came with the wind, sounding dejected. I shook my head slightly as a bodily response, while scooping rice into my mouth and chewing with good humor.
“I’m not saying anything.”
“Our promise is still okay, right?”
“Yes, as long as it’s not you. It’s okay.” “You don’t want to meet me that much?”
I don’t want to meet…
“I have something to tell you.”
“Go ahead.”
“I used to talk to someone on the internet, his name was Pi. We had a lot in common, so we got along well, talked for over three years. We were always good friends. I thought he was my best friend, but recently he started changing. He went from talking about books and games to asking where I study, what I’m doing, and then he invited me to watch movies, to eat out. I went because I like talking to him. And one day, he confessed that he liked me.”
“…”
Phii Godt didn’t respond, there was only the sound of him squeezing his water bottle softly.
“But I always thought of him as a friend. So we stopped talking, even though for those three years we talked every day.”
“Diew, you are afraid I’ll think that way about you.”
“Uh-huh,” I murmured softly. “You might think I’m selfish for making that agreement, but I really can’t. I like talking to you here, I’m happy to have you as a friend to talk to, but I’m not ready to face you. I don’t want to stop talking to you.”
“Diew.”
“Yes?”
“I’ve never forced you to do anything. If you don’t want to meet me, that’s okay.”
“Yes.”
“Diew.”
“Why are you saying my name again?”
“I’m going to sleep.”
My eyebrows furrowed together with a snap, then I shook my head upon hearing that.
“Go to sleep then.”
There was no response from the creature next door. No sound of the glass door closing, just the chime tinkling along with the breeze, and then I heard his soft snoring.
I gave a small smile, picked up the book next to me to read leisurely. I wanted to wake him to go sleep inside, but it seemed he was really tired.
Even when he’s tired, he still comes out to listen to me complain.
Godzilla is hard to understand.
“Sweet dreams.”
After that, the pranks from Phii Godt’s friends became more frequent each day. I didn’t feel annoyed; rather, I found it amusing how Phii Wan genuinely believed I was some child ghost haunting the room. Phii Wan didn’t knock on my door again, just left a daily garland on the doorknob as an apology. Thankfully, he didn’t go so far as to set up a red water offering, or it would have troubled the dorm caretaker.
I was playing with Young-Master in my room after returning from my afternoon classes, with the balcony door left open to catch the cool breeze, when I heard the sound of keys from next door and the usual chatter, but today it seemed more boisterous.
He’s back in his room? Lately, he’s been coming back so late, he said he’s been playing football every day. We only get to chat briefly, sometimes he even falls asleep right there on the balcony.
Click
The sound of the balcony door opening accompanied by a shrill voice. “Godt’s room has such a nice view, I’m so jealous.”
It wasn’t Khun Godzilla, but one of his new acquaintances. Not the deep voice of Phii Beert or the slightly nasal voice of Phii Wan, trying to sound small. Not a woman, but not quite a man either—a new voice to memorize.
“Quiet down, Bell.”
“Are you the one who owns this room?”
“Godt ordered me.”
“Really, not here but he is still giving orders.”
He must not be in the room then; if he were, he’d definitely stop his friends from being so loud. I picked up Young-Master and placed him on my lap, then grabbed a book to read and kill time, listening to the people from next door chatting.
After a while, I heard the wind chime making a louder than usual sound, indicating someone was playing with it.
“Wan, what’s this bell for?”
“It’s the ghost child bell for Godt’s neighbor’s room.”
“What! Ghost next door, what’s that?”
“It’s a ghost, Bell. The kid doesn’t respond to anyone. Only to Godt.” “Real ghost or fake? Can they choose who to talk to? If it’s a real ghost, tell it not to talk to Godt, kiddo, besides his looks, he’s got nothing good going for him.”
“Ask Beert, he’s seen him float out to buy shredded chicken in front of the dorm.”
“Oh Wan, you really believe that?”
“Yeah, after being so loud, go apologize to him.”
“I’m starting to get scared… you’re serious, aren’t you?”
“My face shows I’m joking, I just offered a garland myself, hoping the junior won’t be mad.”
I quickly stifled a laugh, come on, believing in such nonsense to that extent, what ghost would go out shopping for shredded chicken in broad daylight, and even give sausages to the neighbor’s dog?
“Really, Beert?” A sharp voice turned to ask Phii Beert, the most normal-looking person in Khun Godzilla’s friend group. Phii Beert didn’t respond but left a chill for Bell to get goosebumps.
“Don’t blaspheme, Bell.”
Suddenly, I had a good idea. Since they believe it, let’s go all out.
I took out my phone, searched for the creepiest crying child sound clip, played it, and turned the volume up. Phii Bell, who was standing by the balcony first, heard it.
“Ah… Oh Wan.”
“What?”
“I hear crying.”
“You’re joking. Who would cry around here?”
“I really hear it.”
Then there was a rustling sound from next door. Seeing that, I moved the phone closer to the wall to make the sound clearer. Now then…
“Shit, let’s go!”
“Screeech, Wan, don’t leave me!”
There was a loud noise followed by the sound of the door opening. Phii Wan and Phii Bell must have run out of the room. I let out a soft laugh before a deep voice interjected, making me jump slightly.
“Well done, my neighbor junior.”
It was Phii Beert’s voice.
“Phii Beert…”
“You know my name too?”
“I hear it when you guys get loud.”
“Sorry about that.” Phii Beert’s voice and his words were calm and composed, making his personality easy to guess. This man was as different from Phii Godt as heaven is from earth; Phii Godt is boisterous, while Phii Beert is as calm as a flowing river.
“Sorry on behalf of my friend too, they’re just crazy, don’t mind them.”
“Okay.”
“But what about you? Don’t you want to meet my friend?”
I went silent, turned off my phone’s sound, and hugged the balcony.
“I’m not good at talking face-to-face, and I’m not ready for that.”
“Does that mean one day you might be ready?”
“I’m not sure about that myself. I just feel like Phii Godt is a good friend to talk to.”
“Godt cares a lot about others, you’ll start worrying about him after just a couple of days. It’s not strange to feel close to him.”
I knew that already, from the beginning, I knew he cared too much about others.
I didn’t respond to Phii Beert, just gazed out at the view below the dorm.
“I understand that you’re not good at socializing, so you’re not comfortable talking directly to people.”
“Uh-huh.”
“But if you ever feel like coming out, you can tell me.”
“…”
“I’ll help. It’s my way of making amends for all the noise we’ve made this month.”
“Thank you.”
“Looking forward to meeting you, junior…” He paused, as if waiting for my response.
“My name is Diew, sir.” Dearw, as Phii Godt likes to call me.
“Right, Nong Diew.”
Phii Beert’s voice went silent, followed by the sound of the glass door closing and the sound of the room door shutting.
Even just by the sound, I felt he was kind. Phii Beert gave off the vibe of a father or an older brother, someone very calm, as if just by sitting there, he was ready to be confided in about any secret.
But if asked who I feel more comfortable talking to between Phii Beert and Phii Godt,
I would choose Khun Godzilla without hesitation.
It might be because Phii Godt is the only one I trust.
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